Title

Curve Vol.17 No.10 December 2007 See all items with this value

Description

ToC Choo-Choo Choose Chatanooga by Jodi Helmer (p28); Cover: Can't Keep a Good Woman Down [Melissa Etheridge] by Kathy Belge (p30); Michelle Wolff is Hot by Jennifer Corday (p50); Paula Cole is Back, Baby by Aimsel L. Ponti (p52); Gay MySpace Superstars (p54); Our Guide to the Holidays: The 117 Hottest Holiday Gifts by Staff (p34); It's a DIY Holiday by Vanessa Barrington and Margaret Coble (p47); The Hot Lesbians of Theater - On the Stage in 2007: Where the Girls At? by Aziana Baker (p56); In the Spotlight by Laurie K. Schenden (p56); The Low Down on D'Lo by Tania Hammidi (p57); Best of Lesbian Theater by Colleen M. Lee (p58); Cover Photo by Danny Clinch. See all items with this value

Holiday Gift Guide See all items with this value

volume

17 See all items with this value

issue

10

Date Issued

December 2007

Format

PDF/A

Publisher

Frances Stevens

Identifier

Curve_Vol17_No10_December-2007_OCR_PDFa .pdf

Subject

Lesbian Culture See all items with this value

LGBTQ+ magazines See all items with this value

Queer history See all items with this value

Lesbian theater See all items with this value

Online dating See all items with this value

LGBTQ+ musicians See all items with this value

extracted text

A cu----bscription!

renew
d you'll get
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anyone ...

Frankly Speaking

curve
THE BEST-SELLING LESBIAN MAGAZINE

VOLUME 17 NUMBER 10
1550 Bryant Street, Suite 510
San Francisco, California 94103
Phone 415-863-6538 Facsimile 415-863-1609
Advertising Sales 415-863-6538 ext. 10 or 212-446-6700
Subscription Inquiries 818-286-3102
Advertising E-mail advertising@curvemag.com
Editorial E-mail editor@curvemag.com
Letters to the Editor E-mail letters@curvemag.com
Publisher/Editor in Chief
Executive Editor
Associate Publisher
Senior Editor
Assistant Editor
Book Review Editor
Music Review Editor
Contributing Editors

Proofreaders

Art Director
Photo Editor
Production Manager
Production Artist
Web Producer
Operations Director
Sales Department
Advertising Sales
MySpace Manager
MySpace Marketing
Marketing Representative
Editorial Assistants
Photo Assistants

Frances Stevens
Diane Anderson-Minshall
Sara Jane Keskula
Colleen M. Lee
Katie Peoples
Rachel Pepper
Margaret Coble
Julia Bloch, Victoria A.
Brownworth, Gina Daggett,
Sheryl Kay, Gretchen Lee
Theresa Johnson, Rachel
Leach, Michelle Ma, Remy
Ramirez, Katherine Wright
Stefanie Liang
Amy Silverman
Ondine Kilker
Kelly Nuti
Nikki Woelk
Flo Enriquez
Holly DeMaagd
Diana L Berry, Rivendell Media
Lindsey J. Taylor
Amanda Campa
Tammy Lam
Mea Chavez, Jenna V. Loceff,
Kristin A. Smith, Lina Swislocki
Nicole Teichman, Shari Chang

Contributing Writers Azania Baker, Vanessa Barrington,
Kathy Beige, Jennifer Corday, Lyndsey D'Arcangelo,
Maria Ginsbourg, Michele Fisher, Tania Hammidi,
Jodi Helmer, Kathy lsserman, Elle Kaycee, Charlene
Lichtenstein, Karlyn Lotney, Candace Moore, Aimsel L
Ponti, Laurie K. Schenden, Cait Smith, Ursula Steck,
Kyra Thomson, Jocelyn Voo
Illustrators Phil Cho, Katherine Streeter
Contributing Photographers Erica Beckman, Erica Berger,
Myles Boisen, Skip Bolen, Niall Carroll, David Cooper,
Bob D' Amico, Sharon Dominick, Juan Estey, Daria
Garnliel, Leah Gordon, Sara Jorde, Jen Kennedy, Gary
Kline, Brian Knopp, Amal Kouttab, Michael Loccisano,
Terrence McCarthy, Maggie Parker, Mia Nakano, Chris
Polk, Jacklyn Resciniti, Kathy Sauber, Virginia Sherwood,
Don Spiro, Shea Steel, Willie B Thomas, Denise Truscella,
John Valls, Todd Williams, Kina Williams

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Volume 17 Issue 10 Curve (ISSN 1087-867)() is published monthly (except
fOf bimonthly January/February and July/August) by Outspoken Ent8t'J)rises,
Inc., 1550 Bryant St., Ste. 510, San Francisco, CA 94103. Subscription price:
$49.95/year, $62.95 Canadian (U.S. flX1dsonly) and $71.95 international(U.
S. fmds only). Reltmed checks wl be assessed a $25 ~Periodc:als
postage paid at San Francisco, CA 94114 and at additlOOalmai6ng offices
(USPS 0010-355). Contents of Curve Magazine may not be reproduced
in any manner, either whole Of in part, without written permission frOfn the
publisher.Publicationof the name Of photograph of any persons Of Ofganizations
appearing, advertising Of listing in Curve may not be taken as an indication of
the sexual orientationof that individualOf group lXllessspecfficaly stated. Ctrve
welcomes letters, queries, lXlSOlicited
~s
and artwoo<.lnckJdeSASE
!Of response. Lack of any representation orfy signifies insufficient materials.
SubrnssionsG'WTIOIbe rel\.med lXllessa self-addressedstamped envelope is
nduded. No responstJilityis assuned for loss Of damages. The contents do
not necessarilyrepresentthe opinions of the eolOf, lXlless specfficaly stated. Al
magamessent disaeetly. ~lion
lnquries: Please write to Ctrve, 1550
Bryant Street, Sule 510, San Francisco, CA 94103, e-mail shopOcl.rvernag.
com, or call 818-286-3102. Canadian Agreement Number: 40793029.
Postmaster.
SendCanacia1
adcressclmges to shopOcuvemag.com,
Cuva, PO Box
122, Niagara Falls, ON L2E 6$8. SendU.S.adcressclmges to shopOruvemag.
com,Curve,POBox17138,N. Holywood,CA91615-7138.Pmtedn tlwlU.S.

A.

I Want It All This Year
Happy Chanukah!
Merry Christmas!
Happy Kwanzaa!
I'm still not sure how it
happened so fast, but
the holidays are upon
us once again.
Frances Stevens Publisher/Editor in Chief

Don't fret, mon amie, we've done all the hard work for you this year. Realizing that you're women on the
go-not women on the go to the mall on the busiest shopping day of the year-we've made shopping
simple for you by lining up a whole slew of goodies for every gal on your list, even your four-legged
friends.
We've packaged 117 gift suggestions into easy-to-navigate sections. So, if you've got a sporty BFF, simply
head right for the adventure section for the coolest new camping gear or fancy new workout equipment
(Hint: I'm in love with Eureka's N!ergy Tent. With its lights and electrical outlets, you can plug in all
your gadgets, including your portable DVD player. So much for roughing it.) If you're not into the
outdoors, don't stress, our other categories include: good baggage; eat, drink and be merry; home swag;
Paul Frank worship; mom, babies and pets; bath, beauty and beyond; ecofriendly green gifts; stocking
stuffers; plus tech, tools and toys. If you're looking to go a bit more kitsch, I'd suggest hitting the date
night section and ordering the new I Heart Brooklyn Girls calendar or the bling page to see where you
can score one of my new favorite tees from Citizen Body. They're super comfy and come in a variety of
regional imprints; mine says "West Coast:'
While we are on the subject of the holidays, our editorial team is also serving up a bevy of tasty treats
and DIY gift suggestions. Lipstick and Dipstick give advice on how to survive spending the holidays with
your girlfriend's family and the hilarious Michele Fisher takes a comical look at re-gifting. After all, we
all need a little comic relief this time of year.
On a more earnest note, our cover interview with musical superstar, Melissa Etheridge, is unequivocally
candid and insightful. I'd have to say that she'sthe one who's speaking frankly this issue. Writer Kathy
Belge grants us access into the world through Melissa Etheridge's eyes, offering insight on who she is
after winning an Oscar, hosting a Democratic presidential debate, performing at Live Earth concerts, undergoing chemotherapy, not to mention being a spokesperson for gay rights and breast cancer awareness.
That's a lot of weight on the shoulders of one woman. Her dedication to giving back to the community
is unprecedented. We love Melissa's courage and strength. You're our hero.

Keyword: Curvemag Web site: curvemag.com

December 2007

I1

Features

December 2007

Volume 17#10

"I was just
like everybody else,
running on
my treadmill,
trying to
get more
money.
When I
stopped ...
I touched
the part
that we're

28

Tennessee city used to have a bad reputation but

all trying to
get to that
we all think
is heaven or

our writer couldn't get enough of this Southern
hotspot. By Jodi Helmer

30

COVER: Can't Keep a Good Woman Down

Our Guide to the Holidays
34

The 117 Hottest Holiday Gifts The coolest
swag that's sure to surprise. We got something for
everyone on your list. By Staff

47

It's a DIV Holiday We go step-by-step on mak-

Melissa Etheridge has been many things: _wife,

ing cool ornaments and tasty gifts that are both

mother, rock star and even cancer survivor. In

economical and ecological. By Vanessa Barrington
and Margaret Coble

our exclusive interview she talks about children,

we think is
nirvana."
Melissa Etheridge
page 30

Choo-Choo Choose Chattanooga This

politics, money and why she'll never have a threesome-again. By ~athy Beige

50

Michelle Wolff Is Hot The latest on what's in
store for the new season of Here!'s Dante's Cove.
By Jennifer Corday

52

Paula Cole Is Back, Baby After years out of

The Hot Lesbians of Theater:
On the Stage in 2007
56 Where the Girts At? Micia Mosely wonders how
much Oakland culture translates in her one-woman show. By Aziana Baker

54

Gay MySpace Superstars Three women
tap into the massive potential of the Web. Plus,
some of our favorite social networking sites and a
YouTube hottie. By Kyra Thomson

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56 In the Spotlight South Dakotan actor Melissa
Denton is anything but a bad seed. By Laurie K.
Schenden

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57 The Low Down on D'Lo Chatting up Sri Lankan
hip-hop comedian D'Loco Kid. By TaniaHammidi
58 Best of Lesbian Theater This year's shining
stars, with a regional twist. By Colleen M. Lee

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Departments

December 2007

"It'snotjust cold
outside,I have
found.The mood
againstgivingin
the UnitedStates
is on the rise.
'Compassion
fatigue'is what
the media callsit.
I call it-to borrow
from Dickenswho
describedit
so well'scrooginess.'"
page 26

1

Frankly Speaking Our fearless
publisher in her own words.

6

17 Curvatures We get a teenage girl's perspective on Facebook and some events
you need to hit this month.

for these foreign films. So You Think You
Can Oance?'s Mia Michaels gets sexy.

and photographers.

Letters Getting political over Margaret

21 Ask Fairy Butch Vacation time. We

63 In the Stacks We take a look at
bisexuality and dirty deeds. Hilary
Goldberg's Giraffe Medicine Book
isn't about animals.

bring you classic Fairy Butch questions.

26 years of art on the world.

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until after the New Year.

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10 Open Studio Kiersten Stein unleashes

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20 Lipstick & Dipstick Text message sex
isn't sex. Or is it? Let us decide.

Cho, and somebody in Milwaukee
wants to buy us a drink.

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Contributors Get to know your
CURVE writers

8

60 Sapphic Screen Gear up the subtitles

her favorites for the holidays. Striptease
Battleshiip is powerfully sexy.

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pix than you can handle.

14 Out in Front It's all about the kids
this month with activists that are working
for a better future.

23 Relationships Home for the Holidays
guide to visiting the family.

69 Tech Grrl Gifts for that special geek in
your life. Plus the coolest USB gadgets
and a laser keyboard. So Jane Bond!

24 Dyke Drama How to avoid being a bad
gift giver and turning your nephew into a
rabid Republican.

and who's in denial.

26 Politics Giving is one addiction for
which you don't need rehab.

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Sloane is the stylish lady behind the
hip-hop renaissance.

16 Lesbofile All the gossip on who's out

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"In stereotypical lesbian fashion, I met my girlfriend 15 years ago at a Melissa Etheridge concert;'
says KathyBeige."We passed the binoculars back and forth, trying to see if one of those necklaces
around her neck was a labrys. Of course, when she came out in 1993, our gaydar was confirmed.
I don't think my life as a lesbian writer would seem complete without an interview with Melissa:'
Belge has made a name for herself as somewhat of a lesbian guru. After 10 years of working as a
counselor for LGBT youth, she is now the guide to all things lesbian on About.com and writes half
of the CURVEadvice column "Lipstick & Dipstick:'

Kathylssennan
loves reading all kinds of books. She loves listening to opinions, especially her own.
So why not turn those two passions into something constructive:' That is why she began writing
book reviews for online and print publications a few years ago. Isserman has a full-time career
in a construction-related field in the Washington, D.C. area and reads on average 20-25 books
a month, mostly LGBT fiction and nonfiction. Reading and working are not her only passions.
Isserman lives with her partner and their two very spoiled cats. She won't reveal her favorite authors
because, of course, reviewers are supposed to be unbiased.

KyraThomson
is a newlywed, so her interest in online social networking has nothing to do with
finding a partner. She lives in British Columbia and works as a teacher and a travel writer for
Gay.com and PlanetOut.com. Thomson's online discovery of the three women featured in her
article was the result of procrastination. She felt inspired to Google; an hour later, she had three
new sites to visit when she "really should have been working on something else:' Oh, what a tangled
World Wide Web we weave.

'Td never written a how-to article before, so I was kind of nervous;' says cuRvE's music review
editor, MargaretCoble,about her tutorial on making holiday ornaments from recycled CDs. 'Tve
been stenciling on recycled vinyl records, scrap wood and various textiles for years, but the idea of
recycling CDs in this way only hit me last holiday season:' Coble is a folk artist and craftswoman,
as well as a retired DJ and freelance music journalist. While she continues to write for CURVEabout
music, her main focus these days is on her crafty biz, art by mags! (artbymags.com). She lives in
Louisville, Ky.-though she hopes to return soon to her hometown of New Orleans.

"Just give me another assignment, already!" This is how Lindsey
J. Taylorfeels on a daily basis. She
is motivated to write and all she wants is another assignment. As for time to do these assignments,
Taylor wishes there were more hours in a day; however, she loves being busy and having awesome
projects to work on. She goes to school, is the arts and entertainment editor for her campus's weekly
paper, works for a local newspaper and has an internship with CURVEmagazine. 'J\nd I couldn't ask
for a better start;' she says. Taylor always has special projects and she plans to do as much as she can
with CURVE."I will be celebrating my year anniversary with CURVEin January and hope to celebrate
many more with them:'

6

Icurve

!BEAT

Letters

" she is dead wrong on Rudy Giuliani

being 'gay positive.' He most definitely is

not! All the Democratic candidates, including Clinton and Obama, recently appeared
What do you

on Logo, a gay/lesbian network on cable TV.
Practically all were very gay positive!"

19%
iPhone We Want Mo' Cho

32%
A newiPod

11%
TomTomGPS

13%
Giftcertificate
from REI

24%

I love Margaret Cho and thoroughly enjoyed your interview with her [Vol. 17 #8], but she is dead wrong on Rudy
Giuliani being "gay positive.n He most definitely is not! All the
Democratic candidates, including Clinton and Obama, recently appeared on Logo, a gay/lesbian network on cable TV.
Practically all were very gay positive! All the Republican candidates were also invited, but not one (including Mr. Giuliani)
responded to their invitation. Is that "gay positive?"
- Elaine Lotcpeich,Marlboro,NJ.
As a long time subscriber in her late 50s, I'd like to comment

I'm alreadysick on Margaret Cho in your October 2007 issue. I also identify
of the holidays! as queer, married to a man. She looked great on the cover, but
it blew my mind when I saw the photo opposite the article.

*According
toa I almost didn't recognize her. That photographer is pretty
curvemag.comamazing to present such totally different views, yet both unonlinepoll. deniably appealing ( as was the other photo, with red and white
stripes-it's like her new nickname should be Yummy Girl).
Good for her that she's happy now! I was also thrilled to read
P.S.Who'sthatgal her political views. If so many of us feel that way too, how
above?
She'sfromthe can we get things changed, confunnit?! And I find it admirable
GetFitwithAliciaiPod that, even in these vexing times, she manages to be a fount of
seriesfromPumpOne. creative energy and joy. Thank you for featuring Margaret Cho.
Pure delight. Made my day. Aloha from Honolulu.
- Kerry Taggart,Honolulu, Hawaii
Editor's Note: We have to admit we loveMargaret, too, and think
she doesa greatjob of always bringingkey issuesto theforefront in
a way that makes everyone think twice about their actions on this
planet. Keep believing,Kerry!

two). Thanks and keep up the good work, ladies.
- Bet-z Boenning, via e-mail
Editor's Note: We leftout thename of thatgreatneighborhood
joint in

WalkersPoint.Its WalkersPint! We'llbe backfor that drink.

Flashing a cuRvEShirt
Hi,just letting you know I received the CURVE T-shirt I ordered
a few days back. What a great-looking item-it's so "flash" it's
almost as cool as a tattoo! Fits well, too. None of these too-loose
men's styles. Just sorry I didn't get it in time to wear to any of
several local performances of Hedwig and the Angry Inch, which
was big fun. Looking forward to wearing it to the next exciting
queer event. (I don't go out a lot, but something will come along
sooner or later!)
- Kerry, via e-mail

Where's Vermillion Lies?
While I was stoked to see some lesser-known artists in the music
issue [Vol. 17 #6)-mosc especially D'Lo. I noticed a void that
can only be filled by the likes of Vermillion Lies. The band is a
collaboration between two sisters who each play a great number
of instruments, including a heater grate and an old metal gas can.
They sound like jazzy freak-folk with a melodic twist, and they
play and perform some of the best live shows, quite often with
a troupe of awesome burlesque dancers. Their songs range from
breakup songs to politically charged sing-alongs to creepy circus
sounds. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to try to sell the band or just
suggest them, so I'll stop here.
- Anna Hardy, via email
Editor's Note: We didn'tforget about the sister duo, Anna; in fact

Have a Beer on Us
Hello, I just wanted to pass a note on to Kelsy Chauvin, who
wrote the article "Milwaukee's Best, Hidden in Plain View:• I
thought she did a really fine job of covering what Milwaukee
has to offer in just three pages. I really believe that it is a wonderful city and getting better every day. Who knows, in the next
couple of years, it may even be worth a cover story. The best
part was her indirect mentioning of my bar. I just wanted her
to know the next time she's in these parts, I owe her a drink (or

s I curve

they werefeatured in our November 2007 issue:"Top 10 Reasons
We Love VermillionLies''.Hope you enjoyedour pieceon that crazy
vaudevillegroup.

Got Something on Your Mind?
E-mail letters@curvemag.com; write to CURVE at Letters, 1550
Bryant St., Ste. 510, San Francisco, CA 94103; fax to 415-8631609. Please include your name, city and state. Letters may be
edited for clarity and length. ■

Onlyin SanFrancisco
You'll have so many new stories to tell, you'll need proof. !=ind out what's new in Sr: at onlyinsanfrancisco.com/gaytravel

Hiiiir.Hi
BYBIJ
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Kiersten Stein
Kiersten Stein has had a long and successful career as a commercial photographer, advertiser
and event coordinator. She co-founded her own company, Unions in Paradise LLC, an eventplanning service in Hawaii. But being raised in a family of artisans nurtured a creative side,
which Stein has been too shy to show the world until recently. Now she's compiling 26 years
of work, ranging from writing and illustration to painting and photography.
''I've always been very artistic;' she says. "I really had no choice. It was in my blood, and it
was all around me:'
She was getting burned out working in the service industry, and that compelled her to
emerge as an artist.
"I make money for other people;' she says of her time with the advertising company that
she founded at 16. "I conceptualize for other people. My creativity is for other people. So I
needed to come to a place where I was giving back to myself:'
Her first two series as an emerging artist, "Mosaics" and "Quilts;' expressed her views on
the intricacies of life. Her favorite subjects are the flora and fauna of Maui, and her patterns
are inspired by the quilting she did with her grandmother. Her work brings details of life to
the viewer and has inspired a perceptive change among her gallery's
visitors.
Her amazing photographs
display vibrant color up close and
personal using a macro/wideangle technique. Stein prefers to
shoot her subjects in natural light,
without any enhancements. If a breeze blows a feather out of focus, she allows it to
happen, creating an amazing image of motion.
"I can spend five hours shooting one flower. No joke;' she says.
Her other series, "Water Garden;' also brings the haziness of coral reefs into colorful clarity and gives her work a surreal, almost alien feeling.
"I like to play with depth of field;' Stein says."So everything does not have to be
crisp, because everything in life is not crisp:'

10

I curve

1 Attorneys celebrate at the Bay Area Lawyers for Individual Freedom's annual picnic.
Pictured (in no certain order): Lisa McCally, Angie Dalfen (of Pride Law), Katie Kolan,
Liz Noteware and a law student. BALIF is the country's oldest and largest LGBT bar as~
sociation 2 Moving it at Chicago AIDS Foundation's Annual AIDS Run/Walk 3 Writer,
director and producer Nitara Lee Osbourne (second from left) with her cast and crew at a
Phoneix fundraiser for Running on Empty 4 Leslie Grossman (left) and Carly Pope at L.A:s
Itty Bitty Titty Committe premier 5 Good Vibes assistant manager Corie McMillan (left)
and girlfriend Monica Barnes flank Good Vibes board member Margaret Cho at the San
Francisco premier of Barn Barn and Celeste 6 Deborah Paul (the grown up) and friends of
Christie's Place help celebrate the 18th Annual AIDS Walk in San Diego

121 curve

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©2007 Mercedes-Benz USA, LLC

Designedto keepeyesontheroad,handson thewheel
andboredom
in therearviewmirror.
INTRODUCING THE ALL-NEW 2008 C-CLASS.
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Like the most advanced racing machines, this vehicle

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control panel that is
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This not only makes driving safer, but more fun as well.

Mercedes-Benz. That's why.
After seven years of unremitting testing, we bring you

Especially with a 450-watt Dolby Digital surround-sound

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Optimistic Activist

Fighting Complacency

Her mom was an antiwar activist in the' 60s, her
dad, the son of a Harlem numbers runner, and

Even as a doctoral student at American University

she was born in New York City just weeks after
the assassination of Martin Luther King, Jr.
It's in TanyaMayo'sDNA to be a revolutionary and use grassroots activism in the fight
for social justice. "I have spent more than half
my life speaking out," says the 39-year-old
biracial Bay Area artist, youth advocate and
queer activist. "But more importantly, putting

keeps up with her other activities. From creating a
linguistic-anthropological method of communication with politicians that involves topics of gender
and sexuality, to working with the Child Welfare
League of America in creating the first report on
LGBT youth experiences in the foster care system,
to publishing, lecturing and embarking on her dissertation research, there's little downtime.

my words into action to create systemic change
in what I consider an unjust society:'
In addition to her recent stint as a national

Her convictions are deeply rooted in her teens,
when she came out and endured gay-bashing by

organizer for Not in Our Name, Mayo has
also served as the executive director of Loco

childhood friends who thought they could make
her straight. She was scared and alienated, but she

Bloco Drum and Dance ensemble, the youth

was also well-informed and was able to find com-

program director at Brava for Women in
the Arts, and a core member of the Medea
Project: Theater for Incarcerated Women.

fort in news reports that showed gay activists and
the Pride movement.
"I knew I wanted to be a part of that struggle;'
says Marzullo. 'There's this conversation that you

Today, as program director of the Gay.Straight Alliance Network, Mayo says she is

have to have with yourself about being honest,

also am inspired to see the gender nonconfor-

about really looking into your heart and agreeing
with yourself about the struggle, about the fact
that you are all right the way you are:'
While she believes the LGBT movement has
certainly made some strides, she does not believe

mity of this younger generation:'
Today, Mayo is even more focused on that

that young gay people have a clear path to equal
rights in the U.S., and she warns against com-

future, as she just celebrated the first birthday
of her son, Kekoa Nelson Mayo.
"I hope to raise a kind, gentle, courageous
person in a harsh world," Mayo says. "I hope
to raise him to see the injustices and have the

placency in the struggle for the queer cause and
the rights of all marginalized members of
society.
"We must remain watchful to be sure that

beginning to see a bit of light at the end of
the tunnel. "I am inspired daily by the youth
movement within the LGBT scene and marvel
at the passion of the straight allies;' she says. "I

courage to go up against them:'

If you know of any LGBT activists
or any women who are Out in Front
at work, home or in the community,
please let us know by writing to
curvesoutinfront@hotmail.com.

14lcurve

and a Carlos Enrique Cisneros scholar through
the Point Foundation, MichelleMarzullostill

our successes do not equate to status quo apathy when it comes to others who share in similar struggles, whether in regard to race, socialclass status, ethnicity or income;' says Marzullo.
"If there is a worry I have, it's that many gay and
lesbian people might become complacent with
our gains and not translate our experiences of
oppression to others:'

I

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ve~ good girl...

Curvatures

Lesbofile

Coming Out Only to Go BackIn
I

These suspicious stars deny, deny, deny. By Jocelyn Voo

This month, girls are coming out (or staying in)
in droves. The one common thread? It's all being
documented by the media-or MySpace.

Sugar and Spice
Despite her whirlwind marriage in June-not
long after she gave birth to ex-boyfriend Eddie
Murphy's baby-Melanie
Brown, aka Scary
Spice, is being pulled back into the rumor mill as
two women claim they started a two-year affair
with the singer in 2004.
Christa Parker, a 35-year-old mother of two,
claims she and Brown started their affair after
meeting at the school where both their children
are students. Parker then introduced Brown to
her friend Elizabeth Rodriguez, a 26-year-old
sex-toy saleswoman, and the three women would
occasionally hit the sack. Says Parker, "I had only
had sex with a woman once before ... but Mel was
obviously very experienced with women:'
Pictures of Brown kissing a woman appeared
in the U.K:s Daily Mail in 2004. Parker claims
the honeymoon was over once Brown started seeing Murphy, but now she's dragging the skeletons
out of the closet because she's concerned about
Brown's "fragile emotional state'' ... as if Brown
hadn't always been considered the kooky one.

The Real (Gay) World
On the last season of MTV's classic teenage drama TheReal World: Denver, there were the usual
suspects: the gay guy, the sexually uninhibited girl,
the token cute white guy, the black guy with sensationalized anger issues and the emotionally unstable Southern belle. That season's emotionally
unstable one was Brooke LaBarbera, best known
for breaking down in hysterical crying fits-a lot.
But LaBarbera has recently been making news
as something else: a newly outed bisexual, purportedly in a relationship with fellow MTVer
Evelyn "Ev" Smith, who competed in The Real
World/Road Rules Challenge: Fresh Meat. Both
Smith and LaBarbera's MySpace profiles feature
photos of the two of them cheek-to-cheek.
In fact, for a short time, LaBarbera's public
profile listed her sexual orientation as bisexual,
according to an AfterEllen.com article published
on August 24. However, just a week later, in an
August 31 MySpace blog entry, LaBarbera wrote
a gushing love letter to the gay community but de-

16

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nied being gay hersel£ "I love gay people .... I have
this almost fixation on gay people. I think I've always felt that way;' she writes. "I think part of the
reason I love gay people so much is because I enjoy the gay community-I find it is accepting and
open, which are qualities I relish;' she continued.
"Even though I am not gay mysel£ I feel invited
and loved in their atmosphere:'
Gay, straight, bi, questioning-it's all the same,
Brooke. Welcome to our world.

All About Eve
For a while now, rumors have circulated that rapper Eve was in the closet. But in a recent interview with HX magazine, she just laughs it off: "I
get more accusations than I actually do get hit on
now;' she says. "Gay women are way more aggressive than men-I will definitely say that. But it
doesn't bother me. If I'm like, 'Yo, I get it, but I
don't swing that way; then it's all love:'
As far as her music is concerned, "I always felt

good if a gay person gave me props. Honestly, I
feel like if a gay person gives you props, you must
be doing something right;' she says. "I wish I remembered this drag queen's name. . . . I was in
downtown New York and she pulled me to the
side and she was like, 'Girl, you are hot! OK? You
don't let nobody tell you different!'"

A Shot of Tequila
The reality TV genre is already overburdened with
trash-tastic dating shows where hetero singles seek
their soul mate. But now, openly bisexual modelactress-singer Tila Tequila is looking for one good
man or woman on her new MTV reality show,
A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila. Crowned "the
Madonna of MySpace" by Time magazine, with
over 1.5 million "friends;' she has graced the cover
of many a men's magazine wearing little more than
what amounts to a rubber band. "May the better
sex win my love;' the vixen says. Consider that a
gauntlet being thrown down. ■

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Curvatures

Out and About This Holiday Season
33rdAnnual
Alliance
Children's
Theatre's
Christmas Utah Gay and LesbianSki Week (Park
House(Atlanta,Ga.,Nov.17-Dec.9, ticket price: City,Utah,Jan. 9-13): What began as a

$20):Help support the Alliance Children's Theatre
by visiting their Christmas House. Each year, city
designers and florists decorate one of Atlanta's
beautiful homes for the holidays, then open it for
the public to enjoy.Tues.-Fri.10 a.m.-4 p.m., Sat.
10 a.m.-5 p.m., Sun. 1 p.m.-5 p.m.

WorldAIDSDay (Dec.1): Ninety-five percent of the people living with HIV/ AIDS
are in developing countries. Raise awareness
and show support by wearing a red ribbon,
and take part in local events, such as New
York City's traditional candlelight vigil.

HollyFolly(Provincetown,
Mass.,Nov.30 -Dec.2):
P-town, known as a summer vacation hotspot,
revamped its Christmas celebration with Holly
Folly 11 years ago and created the world's only gay
and lesbian holiday party. It's been a huge success
ever since. (hollyfolly.com)

Proposition 2 boycott has turned into an
annual event. Take a breather after the holidays and escape to the mountains, where
you and the gals can hit the slopes or just
play in the snow for a whole week. (877429-6368 for more info)

MummersParade(Philadelphia,
Dec. 31
-Jan.1): Every year more than 12,000 men,
women and children dress in colorful costumes and strut through Philadelphia. The
Mummers take to the streets of Philly on
New Year's Day for a traditional celebration that predates the Revolution. One of
the first events to reach out to the gay community, the Mummers Parade ends in the
"Gayborhood" where the party goes on
into the next morning. The parade includes
string bands, colorful costumes and brigades
of jokers. (mummers.com) - KristinA. Smith

DON'T MISS THE BOAT!
SINGLES, COUPLES, FRIENDS
JOIN US ON "R" NEXT CRUI
PFLAG Mexican Riviera Cruise MARCH 1s-22, 200a
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VACATIONS

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Jb...com/ranbowN
Contact R Family Vacations.com to get your
American Airlines Discount Star Number.

Don't miss the boat! Join us on "r" next cruise and enjoy special events including singles mixers, dinners and customized
excursions. Entertainment includes Cyndi Lauper, Rosie O'Donnell, Ant, Sam Harris plus world-class DJ (and gay dad) David
Knapp. Grab your gear and bring along your friends and family and experience the magic of an R Family Vacations Cruise.
To reserve your staterooms today call 1-866-rfam-vac or your travel agent. Learn more by visiting rfamilyvacations.com.

December 2007

I 17

Curvatures

Teen Tales ofFacebook
As a new junior at the Culver Academies in the
Indiana countryside, I had to find a way to keep
in touch with my friends. At my new school, cell
phones rarely work, MySpace is blocked and mail
is very slow. This leaves us technology-starved
teenagers with only one option: Facebook.
Facebook is the fastest, easiest, trendiest way for
me to keep up with friends back home, new friends
and co-workers. Eighty-five percent of Facebook
users log in weekly.
I began using Facebook during my freshman
year because my mother would not allow me to
have a MySpace or Xanga account. Looking back,
I cannot blame her because I have had a profile on
each site and among them Facebook has caused
me the least trouble. It became a quicker, safer
way to meet people. Mark Zuckerberg developed
Facebook for just this reason. He launched the site
in February 2004. Today, 34 million people are on
Facebook and chances are that you know at least
one of them.
On Facebook, you can find many different, fun

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features. You can add pictures and show off albums.
"The Wall" is where you can type a public message
on a friend's profile. However, if you want to be
more discreet, you can also send them a private
message. Groups on Facebook are a great way to
meet people with similar interests. Some of them
are silly, like I Dance Around in My Underwear;
and I Wish My Homework Was Asexual So It
Would Do Itself Some groups, however, support
serious causes. For example, the Gay-Straight
Alliance at my old school used a Facebook group
to keep track of members and let them know about
important events. Anyone can make, or join, a
Facebook group. Facebook also has a mobile feature, so you can take it with you wherever you go.
As with any social networking site, there are
precautions you should take when using Facebook.
First, be careful about what you put on your site
and who you add as a friend. Facebook can possibly make it easier for someone to stalk you. If this
happens, you can block the person and they will no
longer be able to view your site. The best thing you

*-

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18

can do to prevent this is to make your Facebook
profile private and never put any contact information, such as phone numbers or a street address on
your profile.
And please, never put any potentially embarrassing photos on your Facebook site. Employers
can easily have access to them and a picture of
"wild partying" could possibly cost you your job.
Any photos that are sexually explicit, or of drugs
or alcohol, can tarnish your reputation. Facebook
may also ask you to remove these photos if they
receive a complaint.
Finally, never give anyone your password!
With your password, a person can also access personal information and read your private messages.
Some of my peers have had to shut down their
profiles because they gave out their password and
someone else got onto their site. While this is rare,
it is also preventable. Still, out of all the social networking sites I have used, Facebook is definitely
my favorite. -Cait Smith

*

Comic relief
Individual ~

Is $641 billion just a joke?
Gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people show up in commercials all the
time, but not because of our buying power. Advertisers often use sissies, leather
men and trans individuals as a punch line. We know they can do better.
Commercial Closet Association educates corporations, ad agencies and
universities on informed portrayals of the GLBT community for a more accepting
society while achieving business results. We're a non-profit organization that
works not as a pressure group, but by providing business guidance through:
• Advertising Sensitivity training

• Original data reports

• Best Practices guidelines

• 3,000+ ad library spanning
85 years and 33 countries, with
ratings and feedback

• Annual IMAGES IN
ADVERTISINGAWARDS
• Journalistic coverage of GLBT
issues in advertising

• Leveraging relationships with
businesses, trade organizations,
- universities and the media

We're all more than just a joke. Let's educate corporate advertisers to leave
the GLBT stereotype punch lines in the past, and start planning for the f

Commercial
Closet
Association
Learn more at commercialcloset.org

Advice

Lipstick & Dipstick

Is Text Sex Real Sex?
Dear Lipstick and Dipstick: Does text sex
count as real sex? You're using your mind
to get a reaction, not your body. You don't
have contact from the other person. You
use your brain to figure out how you'll react and what you'll do to the person in
response, but again have no real physical
contact with the other person. So, is it real
or not? - SxyTxyGrl

Dipstick:
No, it's not real. Just as reading erotica is
not the same as having sex, sending a juicy e~mail
or text message is not skin~on~skin lovin'.You can
type to someone what you wish you were doing,
but you're not doingit. There's a big difference..

Lipstick:
Well, that all depends on where you hold
the phone. And if it's on vibrate. Are you holding
it in that special spot-a little to the left and just
where you like it? To me, sexting is no different
from cybersexing, but really, how do you even
know you've had sex in the first place? There aren't
any qualifiers. Lesbian sex is subjective and means
something different to each of us. Is it when her
hand passes your panty line? When your tongue
touches her skin? When your thingamabob goes

into her hoohoo? What sex is to me may not be
sex to you. I'd spend less time worrying about
what it is and more time getting it.

Dear Lipstick and Dipstick: I am a 25-yearold lesbian in an awesome long-term relationship that is slowly making its way to the
altar. Here's the twist: My mom is a lesbian,
but she does not approve of me being one.
I love both of these women and really don't
want to lose either of them. I'm afraid to go
ahead with my engagement. It is important
to me to have my mother's blessing and my
lovely girlfriend understands this. What do I
do? - Bearing Mom's Burden

Dipstick:
As puzzling as this is, your mom's reaction
is common. Abigail Garner, the author of Families
Like Mine, calls this the Second Generation
Syndrome. Even though it's fucked up, your mom
may feel she has failed as a lesbian parent by pro~
ducing a gay child. I know, you would think she
of all people would realize you didn't choose to
be gay. But somehow she feels that having a queer
child makes gay parents look bad in society's eyes.
Your mom may be too caught up in what others

think about her. The
saddest part • is not
just that your mom is
refusing to participate
in your wedding, but
that you're missing all the
lesbo wisdom she could pass on, like
how to find the best B&B in Provincetown, how
to throw a fast pitch, and most importantly, if you
and your partner decide to have children, how to
answer the question "Where's daddy?" Go ahead
with your engagement. Invite your mom to be in
on the planning. Maybe picking out the wedding
cake will soften her up. But don't, for any reason,
give up the life you were meant to live just to gain
the approval of someone else, no matter who she
is.

Lipstick:Hmmm. I'm not sure we're getting the
whole story here, Dipstick. Bearing Mom's Burden,
tell your mom to write to us-we want to hear her
side. For now, this sounds like she's either got a
classic case of deeply internalized homophobia, or
she's a control freak, or she's got WTF syndrome.
Regardless, the bottom line is you're an adult. As
long as you're not hurting anyone, she should be
supportive, period. Unless, of course, there's some~
thing you're not telling us-like you go through
all kinds of extreme phases, e.g. you were recently
convinced that you're a Scientologist, or adopted,
or a man, only to wake up one day and change your
mind, maybe she's looking out for your girlfriend.
Dear Lipstick & Dipstick: As far back as I
can remember, I've loved girls. I like the way
they smell and look. Growing up, I played
games so I could touch my girlfriends and
even remember making out with a few of
them under a pool table. As I got older, I
was interested in cheerleading and gymnastics; I became popular at school, and
even though I was secretly dating women,
I also started dating boys because my
friends were. I only stopped dating men recently, when, after all these years, I realized
it was a waste of time, as all I think about
when I'm out with them is other women.
So, now I'm almost 30 and hardly even notice men. If there's a room full of men and
only one female, I'll find her. Recently, I've
even gone to the local gay bar and had a
one-night stand or two. Besides that, I've

20

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Ask Fairy Butch Advice

Best of Fairy
Butch 2.0
totally fallen in love with a friend of mine.
Is it possible that all this time, I've been
a lesbian and was just fighting it? Is it
just another phase (as my mother put it),
or do you girls think I'm really a lesbian?
- Popular but Pining for Pussy

Lipstick:Bingo! Ding, ding! Get the lady a
toaster oven! You are such a dyke. You only see
the boobs in a room full of men? You're wildly in
love with a woman and it's not your first time?
You're not only a lesbian, Triple P-you're me!
Weve had parallel lives: I was a cheerleader and
did gymnastics, too, and didn't stop dating guys
in hopes that, damnit, I was straight. Well, sit
tight. Your outlook on this whole thing will
soon change. (I can forecast it for you, since
were the same person.) If you're open to it,
which you will be, you'll find your home in the
lesbian community and get to the point where
you'll be grateful you're a dyke, not sorrowful.
I wouldn't change my sexuality for the world!
If you allow your gay-self time to blossom, you
won't be wondering anymore either, and, just
like Lipstick, you'll be on your knees thanking
God you're a certified rug-muncher!

The sexpert is on vacation.
Enter the classics.

Dear Fairy Butch: I
read your column
all the time, and it
has been very helpful. I'm 20 years old and met
a terrific woman online who is 15 years older than I am. I really love her and have never
felt this way about a woman in my whole
life! I was curious, though, if you think the
age difference will cause problems between
us. - Baby Butch Boi in Bakersfield

DearBabyBoi:In a word, cherub: Yes. While the
two of you may bask in the glow of the computer's
glare off your shared instant messages, once you've
brought your love out into the wide-open spaces,
it's more likely to crop up. Age is among the factors
that will pose problems for any couple. Problems
are part of the package. Thus, the age scenario
doesn't negate your chances of long-term bliss, it
just lengthens the odds-considerably. But who
knows? Maybe you'll buck conventional wisdom
and live happily ever after. (From vol. 11 #3)

Dipstick:Sometimes even Dipstick notices
men, if they're dressed especially nice. I think,
"How would that suit look on me? How would
his wife look on my arm? Do you think he'd let
me take his Lamborghini for a spin around the
block?" But other than that, men serve no purpose to dykes like you and me, unless they're
gay and they've come to help dress us for our
first big same-sex date. Welcome to the club,
sister. Makes no difference if you discover it
at 15 or SO-you're a true-blue, all-American
lesbian!

Lipstick:Did you even read the question,

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Dipstick? You're on your men-aren't-necessary
kick again. Remember, if we didn't have sperm,
which, I might remind you, doesn't come easy
out of those silicone toys, there would be no
more little lipsticks and dipsticks and no one to
poke fun at when they wander into the lesbian
bar looking for a threesome. Straight men are
silly, but in-between jobs, they're filling up our
sperm banks. ■
Ask us anything about sex, love or lesbians at
lipstickdipstick.com.

Dear Fairy Butch: I am a 22-year-old dyke,
and I have just had a wonderful experience
with the femme dom of my dreams! I'm pretty new to the top-bottom thing, and I don't
know who should plan this next date: her,
because she's the top; or me, since I initiated it. I would be indebted to you for your
help in this affair. - Nervous N.Y. Nelly

DearNervousNelly:First of all, congratulations
are in order! You've demonstrated a capacity for
expressing yourself in a respectful manner, and
I think it would be most appropriate if you were
to apply that tone in a question to this damsel as
well. If you would like to plan the date, call her, or
better yet, send a polite, well-penned note asking
her if she would honor you with her presence at
a particular place and time. But if she reserves the
privilege of determining these details, then you'll
know that she expects to retain complete control.
If you act on some carefully worded questions for
your new amor, it's quite possible that she'll find
such ministrations to be a refreshing and charming
change of pace. (From vol. 8#3) ■

December 2007

I 21

Advice

Astro Grrl

'Tis the Season
Although Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 22)
Sex: Get the vibe as she contacts you telepathically this
you work December, but don't get your signals crossed and wind up on
the wrong side of the mistletoe. Double check all plans. Career:
hard,Sag, Although you work hard, Sag, you may not see any results beNew Year's. So why go the distance when you won't even
you may fore
get cab fare? Escape ... or delegate.
not see any
Capricorn (Dec. 23-Jan. 20)
resultsbe- Sex: Caps might confuse gal pals with lovergrrls this December.
Blame it on the spiked eggnog and leave it at that. Career:
They
fore New love you at work. They think you are indispensable. Do they
Year's.So realize what you are really up to? Uh, oh.
why go the Aquarius (Jan. 21-Feb. 19)
Sex: Aqueerians are tempted to sleep
distance their way up the corporate ladder. Beware
of tread marks and that long slide down
when you when the affair ends. Career:You can do
wrong at work this December. Does
won't no
that mean sitting on the Xerox machine
even get is a good business move? Your call.
cab fare? Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20)
Sex: Guppies have a special charm this
Escape ... December. Use it to ward off unwanted
Then again, are any really unor delegate. advances.
wanted? Career:
Mixing business with

Cancer (June 22-July 23)
Sex: Be sure to attend all holiday parties. Your New Year's affaire d'amour is at one of them. Let's hope she's at the correct
Cheney event. Career:Prepare for a dramatic change at work.
Does that mean they will recognize all your efforts in the past
year? Considering what those were, let's hope not.
Leo (July 24-Aug. 23)
Sex: Proud Lionesses are homebodies this December. And there

may be one or two other bodies you can home in on during the
holidays. Career:Your job gets better and better through the
month. Try a few new things at work and see if anyone notices.
Errr, deck the halls?

pleasure sounds like a good idea but can
actually result in a lousy outcome. You
don't care as long as you get that raise
... or is it rise?

Aries (March 21-April 20)
Sex: Lambda Rams tear up the sheets with their sexploits this
December. What is in that lovely gift box? Unwrap it, but don't
kiss and tell! Career:
Career prospects brighten toward the end
of the month. Maybe it's because it's Christmas vacation and
you are out of the office.

Virgo (Aug. 24-Sept. 23)
Sex: Gal pals may get you into trouble, but you find that you can
talk your way out of it. Or maybe you won't want to get out of it.
Career:
Your intuition compels you to take a risk at work. How
big a risk is up to you, but somehow volunteering to count the
petty cash is not an option.
Libra (Sept. 24-0ct. 23)

221

curve

Taurus (April 21-May 21}
Sex: Partners and would-be lovergrrls are all over you. Is it your
animal magnetism, Sapphic Bull, or your bonus check? Career:
You daydream the hours away at work. Senior staff thinks that
you are much more productive than usual. Ahem.

Sex: You may think that love is free, but it really wears a price tag

Gemini (May 22-June 21}
Sex: Pace yourself this December, Twin. You will have more
than your fair share of lovelies to meet under the mistletoe.
Ho, ho, ho. Hey, who are you calling a ho? Career:
Tongues wag
at work as you heat up the water cooler to a rapid boil. "Miss
Chief" will get you fringe benefits.

Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22)
Sex: Women gravitate to you like moths to a flame. Will you
singe their wings or burn 'em to a crisp? Pack the marshmallows.
Career:Scarps don't feel like working this December. How
about taking a break with a certain lovely holiday elf? ■
Visit Charlene Lichtenstein, online at thestarryeye.com.

this December. Will you be a sap again for just another pretty
face? So what else is new? Career:
Libras are ready and raring to
go, go, go on the job. But don't bite off more than you can chew,
tempting though it might be.

Relationships Advice

Homo for the Holidays
Lipstick & Dipstick's simple rules for surviving the season.
For those couples who will be spending the holidays with family, be it the
first time or the 20th, may the stars shine bright wherever you are and may
you keep your sanity amidst the twinkling chaos. No matter where you spend
your holidays this year, cuRvB's advice gurus are sending lots of holiday cheer
and hoping you don't make an ass of yourself

Lipstick'sTips for Going Home with Your Honey
"Do You Queer What I Queer?" This is the song I was singing when I got off
the plane in Texas on Christmas Eve many years ago. It was the first time I
went home with my wife for the holidays. Upon arrival, what I immediately
noticed about the small Southern town was that Texans did not queer what I
queer. In fact, they didn't appear to queer at all. I'm sure there were some buttbumping cowboys on the edge of town and a dyke who built A-frame houses,
but I didn't see them. What I did see was a number oflarge, awkwardly moving machines pumping oil out of the ground and enormous trucks blaring
Toby Keith. My partner assured me that there was a gay bar in town. "Prove
it;' I've said every year we've gone back, but she's never taken me. Instead, we
just sit around playing gin rummy and listening to Lou Rawls.
I'm telling this story because I want you all to know, I feel your holiday
pain. And I want to share some tips from the trenches.

2. PrepareYourGal:Does Grandpa gets touchy after his third schnapps? Is
your sister born again and uncomfortable with you talking to her kids? Make
sure she knows exactly what she's getting herself into.

2. LetThemPicktheMovies:Christmas is not only about decorating the tree,
hanging lights and giving gifts, it's also about seeing movies. My suggestion to
rent BrokebackMountain went over as well as her grandmother's haggis pie.
Do yourself a favor and let her mom pick.

3. SetRealisticExpectations:
What do you hope to get out of this visit? Make
it through dinner without a fight? Good. Convince Uncle Henry that gay marriage should be allowed in all 50 states? A great goal, but probably won't be
accomplished over one deep-fried turkey.

3. BringGifts:Good ones, too. And give her mom the nicest one of all-like a
full day at a spa or a gift card to Neiman Marcus.

4. TakePartin FamilyActivities:
Are Mom and Sister Sue hitting the afterChristmas sales? Get up at 4 a.m. and join them. Throw a football out back
with your cousins, and of course, pitch in with cooking and deaning.

5. DrinkEggNog:Make sure it's strong and keep your glass full.

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1. PlanAhead:Be dear with your parents that you're bringing your girlfriend.
If Mom won't let you sleep in the same room, then consider staying in a motel.

1. TakePrivateBathroom
Time:Take as much time as you can get. If there's a
bathtub, even better: fill it up and soak for an hour.

4. Treatthe Animalswith HighRegard:Don't forget to bring gifts for the
pets, too, especially if one of them is an aggressive German shorthair named
Tommy. Steer clear of him.

~

Dipstick'sTips for BringingYour Honey Home for the Holidays
My parent's house is the one families drive across town to see each year.
Thousands of lights. Think Clark Griswold. In addition to the endless strands
outlining the house, there are three lighted trees in the front yard, a full-size
Santa with his reindeer in the driveway and 27 glowing snowmen on the roof
My girlfriend comes from a family that doesn't celebrate Christmas. She
was nervous enough about walking through the light display, but to make matters worse, she knew she'd have to meet all 50 of the Dipstick clan. Poor thing
got cornered by Aunt Shelly and her healing magnets spiel for almost 45 minutes before I could rescue her.
But I knew if she could survive a Dipstick family Christmas, she was a
keeper. Aside from the whipped cream faux pas, she did just great. (Note to
vegans: Just pass on the whipped cream. Don't try to whip up a tofu substitute.
It will make you the butt of jokes for years to come.) Now my mom keeps the
guest room open for us every year and the whole family looks forward to my
girlfriend's famous apple kuchen.

Despite what I go through during my Texas holidays,
and even though I sometimes sacrifice time with
my own family, there's nothing like waking up in
my partner's arms on Christmas morning. At that
moment it's all worth it. And that, my fellow dykes,
is what keeps me getting on the plane each Christmas
season. It's not just because they have damn good barbeque in Texas or because I've yet to beat her grandmother in cards (I'm certain this is my year). It's because
'tis the season to be jolly, and nothing makes me jollier than
being with my girl-even if her folks have a W sticker on
their car.

5. Breathe:
Remember we must take in oxygen to survive. It will be over soon.
Make your visit short. Five days max. ■

Dyke Drama

Michele Fisher

The Miracle of Re ...Gifting
This year, you can keep your crappy reindeer.

Last year, a friend gave me some adorable, old,fashioned, Christmas,themed
nesting boxes. You know, the kind that 6.t into one another until the last one is
only big enough to hold a strawberry, like in a Dr. Seuss story. I loved themespecially when I picked them out for her a few years earlier.
It was one of those moments that was so cliche it didn't seem like it could
ever happen.
At first I feigned interest, then delight. Then I broke down laughing, both
at the situation and at my ludicrous attempt at a coverup. Through guffaws, I
reminded her of where she had acquired my gift At first she looked horror,
stricken, but soon she joined me in a hearty laugh.
Re,gifting requires memory cells that I no longer possess, so I don't even try
it. But that same friend is still a notorious re,gifter, so look forward to hearing
more about her in next year's holiday issue.
The worst gift I ever got was a costume jewelry,encrusted plywood cross
about the size of a textbook. It had a handy hook on the back so I could display
it on my wall (as if). My sister got a matching one-well, not exactly match,
ing, because the cast,off clip,on earrings on mine were mostly lime green and
?anana yellow, while my sister's were more of a mustard and melon combo.

We were horrified, as only preteens can be, when we opened our presents from
the Norwegian neighbor down the street and found those goddamned crosses.
Later that night, when we were alone in our room, my sacrilegious sister and I
fought a duel with our respective crosses and laughed ourselves silly.
Only the holidays could make me envy heterosexuals. All hets have to do
is stop at the mall, thro~ some stuff into bags, take it home, toss a bow on
everything and presto, another great Christmas.
But if you are a dyke, every lezzie on your list expects a thoughtful, fair,
trade, environmentally friendly gift. It's too much pressure.
This year, every dyke on my list is getting a steam,powered vibrator, made
in the U.S.A.
Then you gotta deal with the whole I'm,not,sure,blank,celebrates,
Christmas dilemma. You don't want to offend anybody by giving them a gift,
of course. I wish everybody would offend me by giving me a gift. (OK, not
stupid crosses.)
Hey, Christmas is about giving, right? So, as long as you are not foisting a
gift on a Buddhist, an atheist or a Jew with the idea that you will be similarly
rewarded, then you are celebrating your holiday the right way.
No fair rolling your eyes while you are handing off your gift
and mumbling, "I know you are a heathen, but I still got you a pres,
ent, even though I know I won't be getting jack from you:' Kinda
defeats the whole holiday spirit thing.
You can turn a few token gifts into endless free meals and
fun by letting your non,Christmas,celebrating friends know that
you are open to celebrating their traditions as well. I now eel,
ebrate Tet, Chinese New Year, Diwali, Eid ul,Fitr and anything
else I can get invited to. Christians haven't cornered the market
on guilt, so believe me when I tell you that those little gifts you
give in December will be money well spent when those who feel
obligated to return the favor start calling.
Just make sure you are accepting an invitation to a feasting, not
a fasting, holiday. Believe me, Purim is fun; Yorn Kippur is not.
My friends who do celebrate the holidays will be happy
to know about one change I have made this year. No more
Christmas tree,shaped Jell,O molds or faux gingerbread light,up
Santa's workshops will be coming your way from me this season.
I used to think Christmas,chemed gifts (like old,fashioned
nesting boxes) were fab until last November, when I was rifling
through the countless items in my overpacked storage locker,
looking for the Christmas,themed gifts that I had to display in
my home. As I pried each box open, I had to consider whether
the person who gave me each item was: a) still alive b) likely
to visit me during the holiday season c) the kind of person
who would be devastated if she didn't see the item she gave me
on display.
I spent hours in that crappy locker, my hands covered in
newsprint and my mind ticking off all the great ways I could have
been spending the day. I then cursed everybody who ever gave me
Mr. and Mrs. Santa salt,and,pepper shakers and Property of the
North Pole tea towels. I thought about holding a lighter up to

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the sprinkler head in the ceiling of my unit so that I could righteously claim
water damage as the reason I had not lugged out all my Christmas "treasures"
that year. But those thoughtful folks who had given me the ho-ho-holiday
crap in the first place would just be motivated to flood me with replacement
items, so I kept opening and repacking the boxes until my car was full and
my brain would no longer take no for an answer to that Valium I had been
promising it.
Some people prefer to go giftless. There is a reason that people who throw
Christmas parties often write "No gifts, please" at the bottom of their invitations. They know they are going to get cruddy gifts. And even if you do put
that humble little postscript on your invitations, you are still going to get a
few crumb bums who thrust castoffs from their own storage lockers into your
hands and say,"I know you said no gifts, but I just couldn't resist:'
You are much better off writing "Bring one gift for a group exchange'' on
your invitations. That way, your circle of friends can pass on to one another
that same candy cane candle, Reindeer Crossing street sign and winter wonderland bric-a-brac, instead of foisting it all off on you.
I have covered the topic of what I think about homemade gifts before.
Suffice it to say that you should only give them if you are truly an artisan. Not
if your mom or second-grade teacher told you so, but if strangers, who have
no idea that you were the craftsperson, call your work masterful. I do not
think my Norwegian neighbor would have qualified.
And then there is the whole suitability issue. Did somebody really think
that I, an insomniac since birth, would want a set of ceramic wind chimes?
Sure, the gal who gave them to me was truly an artisan, but an ashtray would

have been more thoughtful.
You know what gift really sucks? Those holiday coupons. You know, the
little booklets that are either readymade or homemade and promise various
things to the recipient. Like, "one free foot rub" or "one home-cooked meal" or,
ugh, those weird sex coupons (unless they don't specify who can cash them
in). If you are in a new, very new, relationship, or if your honey is overseas
serving in the military, then these coupon books are terrific. For everybody
else, they stink.
Just give somebody that foot rub, or make her a soy meat loaf, wrap it
up and tell her it's a Christmas present, but don't give anybody an IOU for
Christmas; it's just tacky.
Another gift-giving no-no is live gifts. Unless someone specifically asks
you for a fighting fish, an orchid or a shaman, then it's probably a bad idea to
give one. The holidays are already fraught with obligations-you don't need
to hand somebody another one. Even a yeast starter kit is too much life for me
to take care of, so I sure don't want a tomato plant.
Christmas is for the young as well as the young at heart, but if you have
any real kids on your list, then listen and listen good: money and toys, period.
No sweaters, no books, no bathrobes or religious objects. They have decades
of bad gifts coming to them; they don't need them this year from you.
It's all about good will. Why did Jimmy turn into a rabid Republican?
Because his dyke auntie gave him a pair of knitted slippers rather than $20
when he was 9.
In fact, this year I am adopting that same rule for all the adults on my list,
too: money and toys, period (hint, hint). ■

December 2007

I25

Politics VictoriaA. Brownworth

The Gifts that Keep on Giving
Trust me, everyone can afford to give something.

Readers of this column know a few things about me. They know I am a lesbian and a writer. They know that I have an incurable, progressive disease and
that I have fought cancer. They know that I am a Catholic and a leftist. They
know that I am an activist whose concerns range from sexual and gender politics to the politics of the planet. And they know that I love Christmas, and
that every year I do a little homiletic commentary about giving.
I have come to realize over the years that regardless of whether you identify as Christian, Jewish, Wiccan or nothing at all, whether you celebrate
Christmas, Hanukkah, the Solstice or nothing at all, this time of year still
brings out the spirit of giving in everyone.
It certainly brings it out in me.
I like giving. I like it a lot. I wish I had more to give, because then I could
do it more. I am limited by my income, but I still give. Back in September, Bill
Clinton published his book Giving: How Each of Us Can Change the World.
It's a book people need to read, but it's more for the rich than the not-sorich. The majority of philanthropists in the United States are actually people
like me, not people like Warren Buffett or Bill Gates. They are
people who don't have a lot to give but feel really strongly that
it's something they have to do.
Giving is a subjective thing: Each of us decides whether,
how, when, to whom and for what reason we will give.
When I was a child, cats followed me home. A lot. They
followed me because I loved them, and I wanted them to follow me so I could help them. They still follow me. I have rescued cats and kittens since I found my first feral cat, Daisy,
when I was 6. Now I have a nonprofit, no-kill shelter in my
home and have rescued and placed more than 800 cats in the
last decade and a half.
When I was a child, I was taught by the nuns to give my
recess money to help the "pagan babies'' in Africa who had
nothing. Now, through a charity, I support a couple of.kids in
Dominica, where the average annual income is $3,500. I have
put three girls through school who would otherwise not have
been able to go. I can still hear the nuns talking about the little
children with no food, no clothes, no books. I can imagine no
food and no clothes better than I can imagine no books. But I
get to give all three to these girls.
When I was a child, my mother's first cousin and her husband lived on a reservation out in South Dakota, where they
were missionaries who taught Sioux Indians and helped them
with the dire poverty they lived in, poverty that my relatives
shared. Now I donate to an American Indian group that also
puts kids through school and feeds them and helps them avoid
the pandemic alcoholism that has ruined the lives of so many.
I was homeless once, for a few months, in a city where I
was a stranger. People I didn't know helped me get through
that, so I always give money to homeless people. Now I have a
home and never stop being grateful for it because I know what
it's like not to have one.
I didn't get many gifts as a child. My family was poor by

26

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most standards, and my gifts tended to come secondhand, from thrift stores.
So when my sister had kids, I wanted to give them things. New things. Neat
things. Fun things. They are all in college now, so the gifts have changed, but
I still love giving them. At Christmas, my biggest shopping spree is buying
gifts for kids who don't have any. Because I know what it feels like to want
something new, that no.one else has ever owned before you.
The most important things I have gotten in my life have been books and
knowledge. So I teach. I give my college students books. I mentor students. I
try to pass on the little key that is learning, because it has made such a difference in my own life. And I hope they in turn will pass it on.
It's cold this time of year in Philadelphia, where I live. I worry about the
cats outside and the homeless people that line the benches on the Parkway in
town. Because homelessness is supposed to be, you know, over.
It's not just cold outside, I have found. The mood against giving in the
United States is on the rise. "Compassion fatigue'' is what the media calls it. I
call it-to borrow from Dickens who described it so well-"scrooginess:'

Compassion fatigue isjust an excuse for not giving when you can. Empathy
is an integral part of who we are as humans. It's actually the thing that sets us
apart as higher life forms: We understand we have a moral obligation to care
for those who need help or cannot care for themselves at all. We know we
need to give. But that doesn't mean we do.
I don't want to turn this into a rant against the Right in this countrywell, not much, anyway-but

they are the leaders of the compassion fatigue

movement. Back in September, George Bush decided it would be best if the
State Children's Health Insurance Plan plan were scrapped. SCHIP is the
federally funded, state-monitored insurance coverage plan for children, all the

That's the thing about giving. We really all have to participate because
some of us can do more than others, and some of us need more than others.
It costs only 10 dollars to buy a mosquito net (nothingbutnets.net) that will
save a child from malaria, the most common killer of children worldwide.
Each of us can handle giving, even if we think we can't. There's always
someone who needs something we have, and there's always something we can
give. Big or small, we can do it.
Some people like to invest; I like to divest. I envy Oprah because she can
do it on such a grand scale, and I can only do it one cat at a time, one child at
a time, one book or gift or meal at a time. But I can do it. And I never, ever

children, in the country. Bush thought, and his conservative cronies agreed,

feel bad about it or think I've made a mistake. That's the unique thing about

that it was sending the wrong message to give kids free health care. That parents wouldn't try to get health care for their kids if they knew they could get
it for free.

giving. It always feels right.
This holiday season, empty your pockets for someone else, whether it's
for mosquito nets, or books for kids at an underfunded local school, or meals

We're not talking cars here, we're talking health care.

for the homeless, or a coat for someone at a women's shelter. Get your friends

Take that, Tiny Tim.
Here's a small example, but one that has huge consequences. I have asth-

together to do the same thing. Tell them that instead of getting you a gift this
year, you want them to buy a food basket for a poor family, or donate to the

ma and have had it since I was a child. My sister has it. My nephew has it.
None of us died because we were all able to get medication that saved us

Marine Corps Reserves' Toys for Tots or find something that someone else
needs more than you need another CD or sweater or bracelet.

when we had life-threatening attacks. But if you don't have health care, then
you could die. As a kid, I was rushed to the hospital many times with attacks
so bad I turned blue. Why would anyone want someone's child to turn blue
and die of an asthma attack when there are inhalers and nebulizers that can
save those kids' lives?

It may or may not be cold where you are this time of year, but your
warmth can make someone else glow with joy for the holidays. Giving is
about the best thing you can do for yoursel£ And it's definitely the best thing
you can do for others. There is one catch, though: Once you start, you may
find you don't want to stop. ■

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December 2007

I27

ga once had the unflattering distinction of being one
rtiest cities in the United States, so I had no idea what
ect when I traveled there this summer. As it turns out,
has cleaned up its act. I was surprised to find not a

gies grown on local farms. After I noshed on mushroom ravioli

downtown, but one

I arrived in the evening, when temperatures

and homemade sorbet, I headed for the heart of the Riverfront
District and watched kids splashing around in the outdoor foun-

of the hippest cities in the South.
were cooler, and

decided to take a walk. I set out in the direction of the Tennessee
River, where a $120 million waterfront revitalization project is

tains. (I later learned that architects designed the fountains so
folks could kick off their shoes and ha~e fun in the water.)
Next up was the Tennessee Aquarium. To be honest, I was

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not expecting much. I went in with an if-you've-seen-one-aquar-

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the sun started to set, but there were still a lot of shopkeepers

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eager to offer me a bit of Southern charm. I spent hours brows-

aquarium has a huge touch tank where visitors can reach into

ci5
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ing through the shelves at Rock Point Books on Broad Street,

the water and touch the silken rays as they swim past. I was a

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checking out titles like Long Time Leaving: Dispatches from Up

little kid again, giggling and jumping back each time my hand

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South and Growing Up Gay in the South and talking to the sales

passed over the back of one of the big black rays. The aquarium

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clerk about upcoming readings.

was designed to mimic the feeling of flowing downriver, with

underway. The streets of downtown Chattanooga

were quiet as

Next, it was on to dinner at 212 Market, a local restaurant

28 j curve

able power and sends leftovers home in to-go boxes made of corn.
The menu changes with the seasons but is full of fruits and veg-

smog-filled metropolis with a deteriorating

Bluff View Art District
(above) offers a fun stroll,
while Chattanooga's
riverfront (right) is just
that dam pretty

Maggie and sisters

Market composts food waste, uses renew-

was made almost four decades ago,

since that pronouncement
Chattanooga

Owned by the Moses family-mother
Suzie and Sally-212

that is said to have launched the revitalization
Chattanooga.

of downtown

It opened in 1992 and was one of the first busi-

attitude-until

I saw the stingrays. The

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After the aquarium, I decided to check out more aquatic life

nesses to sign a lease downtown. Others soon followed, but still,

on a sunset kayaking trip along the Tennessee River. Outdoor

none are as popular as 212 Market.

Chattanooga, an organization founded to provide outdoor recre-

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ation and education about the natural resources in the area, runs
trips that include kayaking equipment and a guide. We paddled
several miles along the banks of the river, past herons and huge
waterfront homes, and watched the sun set over the water.
The outdoor activities were the main reason I decided to
visit Chattanooga. It's billed itself as a progressive city with lots
to see and do, especially for people who are into the environment and the outdoors.
The one activity that everyone raves about is hang gliding. Chattanooga, it seems, is home to the largest hang gliding
school in the U.S., Lookout Mountain Flight Park. For $139,
it's possible to get strapped to an instructor, pulled into the air
attached to an ultralight plane and released at 2,000 feet, using
the wind gusts to stay airborne. It was the scariest thing I've ever
done (and I've been skydiving), but it was so worth it. Plus, the
package includes pictures, so I have photographic evidence of
my stint as Adventure Girl.
Some of Chattanooga's must-see attractions were, admittedly, a little too kitschy for me: Ruby Falls has blazing neon
signs illustrating the names of various rock formations and a
light and sound show at its underground waterfall. Add to that
the $15 admission charge and it goes from being a natural wonder to an overpriced amusement park experience.
Rock City Gardens is a beautiful place for an afternoon
stroll (and the view of seven states from the top of Lookout
Mountain is stunning), but the section of the gardens called
Fairyland Canyons-which
depicts storybook scenes in an
underground cavern complete with garishly colored sculptures
and black lights-can, and should, be skipped.
There are a lot of attractions that are worth a gander, like
Reflection Riding Arboretum. It's a 300-acre park with narrow
scenic roads that weave through dense forests and huge meadows; it's home to more than a thousand different native plant
species. You can drive through the park, stopping to check out
the wildlife and admire the lush surroundings, or-and this was
a huge draw for me-you can park at the entrance and walk
through the arboretum. There are lots of secluded spots for a
picnic, or just to relax on a blanket. I even saw a woman doing
Tai Chi one afternoon.

Not into the outdoors? There is still a lot to do in Chattanooga.
The upscale Bluff View Art District on the outskirts of downtown Chattanooga has several galleries and restaurants, including one with an outdoor bocce ball court. The food and the art in
this neighborhood are excellent, and the prices reflect that.
I loved the hip North Shore, which is across the river from
downtown Chattanooga. A bridge that used to carry cars across
the Tennessee River was turned into a pedestrian walkway when
it became too old for vehicular traffic. It's a nice, albeit long, walk
across to the up-and-coming North Shore.
I'd heard that Clumpies has the best ice cream in the South
so I ordered a double scoop (I was on vacation and had just
walked across the pedestrian bridge; I deserved a treat), and
then ate it while I walked along the waterfront.
On the North Shore, the waterfront is called Coolidge
Park and has a much more laid-back vibe than downtown
Chattanooga. There were pickup soccer games, a few women
climbing a rock wall installed on one of the bridge supports, and
tons of people, myself included, lined up to ride the Coolidge
Park Carousel.
There are restaurants, art galleries and even a doggie boutique along Frazier Avenue, the main street on the North Shore.
The shops are less ritzy and the vibe much more liberal than in
the Bluff View Art District. It's quite common to see anti-Bush
paraphernalia and women-friendly books and art.
I spent most of the trip doing outdoor activities and the little time I had left I spent shopping and eating. I did ask around
about Chattanooga's nightlife and it seems like the options for
girls are slim, though a club called Images did come up.
Still, I have to admit that I was surprised at how progressive
Chattanooga was. Aside
from being oppressed
by heat, I didn't feel like
I was in the oppressive
"old" South. Though not
one person said, "Y'all
come back now;' I know
that I'll visit Chattanooga
again. ■

TENNESSEE HOTSPOTS

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Sure, the lyrics "Pardon me, boy, is
that the Chattanooga choo-choo?"
sound familiar, but it's the real
Chattanooga Choo-Choo that is not
to be missed. The former railroad
station turned hotel still has a lot of
its original charm. It opened in 1909
as a railroad station and was converted into an entertainment complex in 1973. The 24-acre site has
a model railroad museum, several
restaurants (including one housed in a
dining car and another where servers divide their time between serving
meals and standing onstage singing

for diners), and an authentic New
Orleans trolley that runs through the
grounds. One of the biggest draws to
the Choo-Choo is the unique accommodations. There are 48 restored
train cars that have been turned into
hotel rooms. Several of the cars have
queen-size beds and others also have
trundle beds. The complex is owned
by Holiday Inn Hotels and the train
cars make up just a small number of
rooms in the hotel, so be sure to ask
for the train car accommodations
when booking a room. The rail cars
are often reserved far in advance,

so book early if you have your heart
set on staying here (choochoo.com).
Be warned: The Choo-Choo bills
itself as the premier destination in
Chattanooga for families and offers
packages like Children's Fantasy
and Conductor's Special, which are
aimed at families with two adults and
two children. Although a reservations
agent assured me it's gay-friendly, I
saw mostly grandparents and small
(het) families when I was there. Who
knows, maybe that means it's a great
place for you and your baby mama to
take the wee ones.

December 2007

I29

an't
oman
own

By Kathy Beige
Photos By Danny Clinch

Melissa Etheridge's life has been an open book. We've watched her
unfold, unravel and unload since she came out in 1993. Perhaps
she's never been more visible than now, winning an Oscar for the
song "I Need to Wake Up;' hosting a Democratic presidential
candidates' debate on Logo, performing at the Live Earth concerts and, of course, becoming a spokesperson for breast cancer.
She and her wife, Tammy Lynn Michaels, have added twins to
their family (which already includes Bailey and Beckett, the kids
she had with ex Julie Cypher). To hear about her new album and
new outlook on life, we sat down between br~nch and putting
the twins down for a nap and talked about how the world looks
- through Melissa Etheridge's eyes.
You did a fantastic job with the HRC candidates' forum
on Logo.

That was really a challenge. It's not easy trying to represent our
community, which is probably the most diverse community
in the world.
Was there one candidate who impressed you?

I have to be honest. Going into it I was a big Hillary, Obama, even
Edwards [fan]. But I came out of that forum being a Dennis
Kucinich fan. I listened to him. I was completely taken by
what he had to say and how he said it. I started to do research
on him, and he's a courageous leader. He is the kind of leader

that this country needs. I mean, he has already brought up in
Congress the bill to form a Department of Peace. It's the kind
of groundbreaking stuff that people say, "Oh, that's ridiculous" and "He'll never get elected:' Why am I denying that to
myself? If I'm going to walk my talk, I'm going to say that
Dennis Kucinich is the man who represents the future that
I want to see.
You were pretty brave, the way you confronted HIiiary
Clinton. What were you hoping to hear from her?

The last couple of weeks of the Clinton presidency, they did a
fundraiser. I told him, "You know, I came out at your inauguration, and the years since ... it was difficult, but at least you
called us in and let us sit at the table:' Afterward, he gave me
a hug and with tears in his eyes, he said, "I wish I could have
done more:' I believed that he knew that he had sold out on
those issues-that he really caved in and morally he believed
inside of him that it was wrong. [With] Hillary, I wanted to
see a little bit of what I saw in [Bill] Clinton that night. I
wanted her to go, "You know what, it's not right. I want to do
more:' I wanted a little humanity in it. I just wish she would
just stand up and say, "Yes, this is what's right:' Because I
know that she knows it.
It's almost like you could see them saying, I don't support

gay mamage-wink,

wink, wink.

December 2007

I31

I mean, come on! Do we have to do that anymore in our country?
I don't think Lyndon Johnson said to Martin Luther King,
"You'vegot to wait for everybody to catch up with you. Were
not all ready for equal rights:'No, you don't do that. You make
the radical changes, you do what's right, because you know it
in your heart and in your soul. I'll get off my soapbox.
No, no, no! When are you running for office? That's what

I want to know.
When I raise my children and my albums are done. Give me 10
years!
You won an Oscar for singing "I Need to Wake Up" in the
movie An Inconvenient Truth. How did you get involved in
that project?

like a wave. I had to be still because it was too painful to watch
television. It was too painful to read. It hurt to listen to anything. Hours and days and weeks on end on chemotherapy,
I just laid there in my bed, quiet. Pretty soon, that little tape
in your brain, it just runs out, and theres nothing. When you
sit there and have nothing in your mind and it's quiet, you
can actually hear your soul. That was a life-changing moment.
It was brilliant. I touched the part that were all trying to get
to, that we all think is heaven or we think is nirvana. And all
it was, was just being still. I just am. And I'm beautiful and
amazing and powerful, and everyone is, and theres just love. It
just came to me. I started walking in it. At first I didn't read it
in any book or anything, but it just came to me.

"I am just a girlfrom Kansas.Just like everybody·else is a person
from somewhere.Everydaypeople ... can do great thingsand we
can change the world. I have no doubt ... that tomorrowif everyone ... thoughta littledifferently,the world would change."
Al Gore is a friend. He said to me, "Melissa, were going to make
a little documentary film, and I thought I'd like a little song to
go with it:' And I was like, "Yeah, sure, I'll write a little song:•
I had no idea if it would be more than something they'd show
in high schools. Actually seeing the slide show changed my
life, because it was like, time's up, I can't just fudge along anymore. I need to start understanding that every step I take and
everything I think about my world affects everybody else. So
my last tour was biodiesel. And now at home, I have biodiesel
in my garage. I am doing everything that I can and am learning every day how to live and make less of a footprint.
You've gotten a hug from a president, a call from a vice
president. Does that ever trip you out, the level of influence of the people you associate with?

You know why it doesn't trip tne out? It's because along this journey that I have been on, I am just a girl from Kansas. Just like
everybody else is a person from somewhere. And when I meet
these people, I realize that they're all just people from somewhere, doing their thing. I am honored to know them and
speak to them, especially the ones who have done great things
in the world, because I see them as people. I see that everyday
people, you and I, can do great things, and we can change the
world. I have no doubt in my mind that tomorrow, if everyone
just got up and thought a little differently, the world would
change. I know that.
Thoughts become actions, like in The Secret.
You know what I feel about The Secret? The Secret is like the
McDonald's of the movement. I saw The Secret after I had
come upon this wisdom. This wisdom I got when I was
forced to be still, when I went through chemotherapy. 1}:iat's
why I look at the breast cancer and chemotherapy as a gift,
because it stopped me. I was just like everybody else, running
on my treadmill, trying to get more money, trying to get more
famous, when I stopped and the whole world broke over me

32

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And then I started reading. I read everything from quantum physics and string theory to cosmology, to Plato, to Don Miguel
Ruiz, to the self-help things. I'm telling you, every single one
of them is talking about the same thing. And it'sjust the thing
that I found [as I was] laying there quiet in my room. Thought
becomes reality. All there is, is atoms and space.
You've won two Grammys, an Oscar, GLAAD media
awards, what's next? The Nobel Peace Prize?

Sure! Sign me up! You know what? I don't try for those things.
Those things are the best when they just happen, when I'm
doing what I love. Like for "I Need to Wake Up;' I loved the
project, the movie and Al. I was honored. I thought it was
very important to sing about waking up because I think that's
what we're doing right now. Were all becoming aware and
awake. It was just a great opportunity to put that message forward. I got this little shiny bare-assed man statue in my room.
[Laughs]And that's fun. But I certainly didn't do it for that.
Do you ever tire of being the poster child for the gay
community?

I am honored by it every day.There are some really great gay leaders now. People are coming out on a local level now, and that's
what makes the difference. And if me being all out and loud
helps with that, awesome! I was asked to sing at a NASCAR
race last week. Any time I'm asked to go into the heart of fear
of the people who fear gay people and think they don't know
gay people, that's when I want to step up now. I'm through
with the us and them thing. We are all just people. We need
to stop being afraid.
Do you ever wish you could just go back to playing the
bars again?

I_do wish that I could walk into a bar and just sing. I have this
little dream of walking into a blues bar and theres a band and
we do a couple of songs. That it could just be that. Tammy
and I will sometimes go out when were on the road and well

go into a bar and we know we'll have 30 minutes before peo,
ple call other people. We have a drink and pretend nobody
knows us, and then we run outside.
Thank you for the invitation to just sit and listen to your
new album. And I know you're calling this a concept
album, and I'm wondering why you're doing that now. Is
it because of the place where music has moved, where
people are just downloading songs?

Because that's not the art I'm making. Because, like you, I miss
running out and getting an album and knowing that the artist
is going to say something to me from the first song to the last.
And knowing that the artist is thinking about the world and
their soul and things that music transcends. I put that into this
album. I'm not an artist who just wants to put a song on the
radio. I'm done with that. They have marketed and researched
themselves into such a little bitty comer that all the music
sounds like everybody else. While I was on chemo and going
through everything, I said there is no reason on earth why I
shouldn't love everything I do and everything I make. Isn't that
what you want as a listener? That's what music's about.
This album does feel different to me than your other
albums, and one of the things that feels different is
how overtly political you are. The song that struck me
was "Imagine That," with the references to the anti-war
movement. Was there any fear in putting such an overtly
political song on an album?

Yeah. Let me tell you. When I started writing the songs, I liter,
ally sat down and made a deal with myself I said, if I fear
anything that I'm writing, I promise to go straight into it and
do it and finish it. That fear is exactly where I need to go. I
would start things and go,"No, I can't do that:' I did that with
"Imagine That;'"Kingdom of Heaven;' with "Threesome:'
"The Unexpected Rain" is so bluesy, it's sad. What were
you really trying to convey with that song?

The concept of the album starts with that dream of Hollywood,
of I'm going to California and I'm gonna be rich and famous
and I'm going to be gay. While I was looking professionally
for those things, of course I was personally looking for rela,
tions in the gay community. Actually, right down the street
from my aunt's house was the Pink Flamingo. It was a bar,
and I would go there and sit and wait for someone to talk to.
I met a couple someones. It was me trying out my gay legs.
I met a lot of women, played a lot of games and did a lot of
things that I'm not proud 0£ That song is talking about that,
the things that we do to each other, relationship,wise. It was
my coming clean. I wanted people to see that there are things
we have inside of us (and] if we just talk about it and get it
out, we can let it go.
The lesbians are going to be very upset. You're never goIng to have a threesome again?

I'll tell you the story. Tammy was pregnant. She was taking a nap
and I was poking around on my guitar. She woke up and she
said, "Oh my God, I just had a dream that you and I had a
threesome with Linda Evans from Dynasty:'And it really up,
set her. I had my guitar, so I (sang], "I don't want to have a
threesome:' I just joked around with her and I just started
writing it. And I finished it and went, "I can't put that on the

album. Uh oh, now I have to put that on the album:'
I've got a lot of friends who are having kids. I'm wondering why you chose an anonymous donor this time?

Having had the experience of my older children knowing their
biological father, it's really great. That was important at the
time. (In] my experience with my last relationship, that's what
made sense. They love him, they know that he's their biologi,
cal father, even though David (Crosby] doesn't parent them
at all. So when Tammy and I wanted to make babies-she
didn't know her father, really. He really wasn't a part of her
upbringing, so that needing to know who your father is just
didn't exist. We both knew that we wanted these babies, and
we are their parents, and we didn't want it to get any more
complicated than that.
What else do you want to tell me?

I love the gay community, and I especially love the lesbian com,
munity. They've always been there for me, through my ups
and downs. Love to all my sisters. ■

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5. PILATES POOL PARTY
Water offers one of the best excercise options so the portable Aquavee Pilates, a
resistance and swim workout for the pool,
makes the most of it. Instructional DVD
included. $120, aquaveeonline.com

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6. WORKOUT WHEN YOU'RE NOT EVEN
TRYING
Getting fit and fabulous is easy when you
wear MBT Physiological Footwear-shoes
that increase muscle activity in leg and core
muscles, and relieve pressure in the knee and
hip joints. $240 and up, swissmasaius.com

1. SAVE THE PLANET
Spend time with a pack on your back? Why not put all that sun exposure to good use? The revolutionary Solar-Powered Juice Bag allows
you to charge your cell phone, iPod, Blackberry or GPS. It stores the
energy it absorbs throughout the day, so there's no need to worry
about a lack of sunshine when you need to recharge. Plug in anytime,
day or night, and you're a self-sufficient machine. $270, gaiam.com
2. IDIOT-PROOF CAMPING
This Portable Gas Stove couldn't be easier to use. It comes in a
lightweight briefcase-size carrying case and its one-touch auto
ignition instantly brings the fire to life. It's safe and easy, and
there's no need to worry about your matches blowing out or
getting wet. $30, firebox.com
3. MOVE OVER CROCS
Splash through puddles, brave city streets, or take
a hike in LL. Bean's waterproof women's Storm
Chaser Clogs. $49, llbean.com
4. TAKE IT WITH YOU
The organized pockets, pouches and compartments of the Shockwave Book Pack
give angsty teens quick and easy access to
whatever it is they're carrying these days.
$69, llbean.com

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7. TOOL TIME
You'd be lost without a flashlight, but think
of everything else you need to camp. Enter
the Adventure Pius's 7-tools-in-1 , with a
thermometer, mirror, magnifier and match
storage compartment. $24, gaiam.com

0
8. A WET DREAM
OF A TENT
Eureka's N!ergy 1310 Tent
has cigarette lighter type
outlets inside (powered
by the E!Power Pak) that
let you plug in everything
a girl could need in the
woods from lights and
fans to cell phones, iPods
and portable DVD pl~yers.
Combine it with the Casper
15° Women's Mummy Sleeping
Bag (try Cimarron or Copper River) and the
N!ergy Pillow (which fits in the Casper's
pillow pocket) and features two speakers so
you can play movies or your iPod in stereo.
Why go home? $25-$290, eurekatent.com
9. NOT PICTURED: TRAVEL DOOHICKEY
The funky sleek 4-in-1 Nomad Travel Silverware has a sturdy fork/knife/spoon/bottle
opener that folds into one and hangs from a
cool lanyard. $20, uncommongoods.com

10. DYKESVILLE HARDWARE MESSENGER BAG
Be bold as a highlighter while alluding to what's inside your bag
of "tools." The perfect alternative to the boring old briefcase.
$23, dyketees.com
11. CLUTCHING YOUR STUFF
These Femme Sud purses put a retro spin on the modern-day
woman's clutch. Our fave? The Limited Edition red lambskin Ex
Libris Yearbook, which looks remarkably like the real thing, and
the First Place Grand Prix Wristlet. $225 and up, femmesud.com

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12. BETTE BAGGAGE
The Lements Travel Bag is hot, black is always
in and the Love and Pride's L Word Collection
screams sophisticated style worthy of Ms.
Porter and her peeps. $175, loveandpride.com
13. BREAST CANCER AWARENESS
Krina's Isadora Bag is a tasteful blush color
that's not only as sexy as satin panties, but
helps support breast cancer research. $360,
krinabag.com

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15. COWGIRL CHOCOLATES
Owned and operated by women, Cowgirl Chocolates offers Somethin' Fancy Caramel Corn (think Pumpkin Spice
or Chipotle Vanilla), Hot Hazelnut Toffee or Spicy Caramel
Nut Clusters. $11 and up, cowgirlchocolates.com

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14. OLIVE JUICE
With exotic flavor combos like Maison Verlet's Coffee &
Black Olive Tapenade, a Discovery Set of exotic oils (White
truffle? Chile?) and Mint Olive Oil, O&Co. has it all for the
gourmand on your list. $12 and up, oliviersandco.com

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16. ESCAPE TO ITALY AT HOME
Missing that Italian flair? Make your own gelato using fresh organic
ingredients with this supreme Villa Dolce Gelato Maker. $110,
villadolcegelato.com
17. FOLLOW THE RABBIT
Zen Rabbit Gratitude Cookies's buttery, sweet, thin, crunchy cookies will show your coworkers how much you appreciate them. $22,
zenrabbitcookies.com
18. BLOOMING CUP OF HEAVEN
The Teaposy Garden Gift Set includes a 16-ounce glass teapot with
loose-leaf tea filter, a pair of glass teacups and a medley box of six
different gourmet teas. $59, wishingfish.com
19. PURSE-SIZE PROTECTION
Both compact and portable, the Salter Nutri-Weigh Travel Scale can
record your daily food intake on the go for up to seven days. This
sleek Iii' computer can actually calculate the nutritional values like
calories, protein, carbs, cholesterol and more. $60, int.com
20. PERK YOURSELF UP
The innovative Capresso Burr Grinder minimizes
static, prevents clogging and ensures that no
ground coffee remains inside the grinder. It has 17
different settings and a timer. $50, capresso.com

38

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21. ICE CREAM BY THE FIREPLACE?
Sure you don't want ice cream
samples in your stockings, but
these delicious ice cream samplers
are perfect hostess gifts. $3 and up,
sheerbliss.com

22. NOT PICTURED: VEGAN
DONE RIGHT
Want a vegan dessert but frightened by
rumors of cardboard-textured disgustingness?
Fear no more. Allison's Gourmet has perfected
the art of the delicious, cruelty-free cookie.
Try the cookie or brownie of the month club,
or both, because you can. $32 per month,
allisongourmet.com

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23. FORGET ABOUT MUDFLAPS
Eat with a sexy girl every night with these
Naked Lunch Pop Ink plates that will
delight your dinner guests long after they've
licked them clean. $14, popink.com

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24. THE ELEPHANT IN THE BARROOM
Serve up some fun from this retro remake of a classic, the Liquor Elephant,
$25, fuzzydude.com
25. CAN YOU SMELL WHAT I SMELL?
Get into the season with Aroma Cones, richlyscented wax-dipped natural pinecones that
bring the beauty of the forest home with scents
like clove and sage. $8 and up, lightstone.com

26. WHO DOESN'T LOVE THE MONKEY?
Fashion accessories from Paul Frank come in
sleek or quirky looks. We adore (above, left to
right) the Dazzle the Unicorn watch, sophisticated
Freedom of Choice watch, Lulu watch in wood
or pink, and the Fistful of Dollars sunglasses (in
chocolate stripe). $65 and up, paulfrank.com
27. DOGGIE STYLE BABY
Show her you're smitten with a
ChaChi Loves Esperanza Hoodie
or a cute tee like (not pictured)
Chachi in Love or Skurvy Rainbow
$26 and up, paulfrank.com
28. TIE ME UP, TIE ME DOWN
OK, this bike babe isn't sporting
Paul Frank but we love the Tomcat's Lizzie Borden Tie (Rigged's
Outlaw Shirt on pg. 48). $10, tomcatthreads.com

29. AHOY, WENCHES!
Sail around on the super hot Pirate Scurvy
Cruiser bike with its gloss black finish, basket
and "I love my bike" bell. If your girl is this
cute, even better. $330, nirve.com

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30. TRES CHIC POOCHIE
Your dog will be as fabulous as you with Fab Dog toys,
inspired by chic status symbols like the classic tennis
bracelet and laptop. $13 and up, fabdog.com
31. IT'S BEGIN.NING TO TASTE A LOT LIKE
CHRISTMAS
Cloud Star's Buddy Biscuits gingerbread-flavored dog
treats are all-natural, don't contain salt, sugar, dairy or artificial flavors or colors. Cloud Star also donates a portion of
its proceeds to animal shelters. $6, cloudstar.com

32. BASH THAT BUSH
Now your kitties or doggies can take a bite out of Bush as
they chew on George the Lame Duck catnip-stuffed duck
or squeaky dog toy. $6 and up, moodypet.com
33. MOM MAINTENANCE
Cleaning can be fashionable with these extra chic Red
Cherries Gloveables. $14, wishingfish.com
34. GIFT BOX TO GO
Surprise a Pet allows you to create a variety of gift packages containing combinations of tasty treats like Pawbreakers cat candy, fun toys and pet-pampering spa items.
$30 and up, surpriseapet.~om

35. AFFIRMATION IN FLEECE
Affirrnawraps are fleece blanl<ets with affirmations
(strength, courage and more) printed on them. They
come in adult and baby sizes too, but our fave is this
cute pet blanket. $30, affirrnagy.com
36. PUCCI FOR POOCHIES
While chewing on Dancing Dog's adorable high-heel
and purse-shaped toys, your pup can have a taste of
fashion and leave your costly goods untouched. $6,
petco.com
37. PURFECTLY SWEET COMBOS
Match your doggy's leash and collar with hip color
coordinated paisley, polka dot or striped choices from
chic Owen + Olivia. $26 and up, owenandolivia.com

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39. SPIRITUAL SKIN
Health and beauty magnate Akhassa's new Varada Hand Therapy
ritual is inspired by the Varada mudra-the Buddhist hand position
signifying charity and compassion. The lovely fragrance and packaging make it a perfect gift set. $16 and up, akhassausa.com
38. STYLISH TODDLERS
Made by moms for moms, Right Bank
Babies aims to make your kids' clothes
last. Reversible, comfortable and fashionable, we love the paisley-printed
dresses and tattoo-patterned pants.
$53 and up, rightbankbabies.com

40. GET BALANCED, BABY
The rainbow, or "wheel" of the seven chakras, originating thousands
of years ago in the ancient Hindu system of healing, represents
aspects of consciousness from wisdom and self-expression to love
and sexuality. Abrione's new Chakra Masques (made with green tea,
pomegranate and more) help to stabilize chakras that are not balanced. $30 for set, vbcosmetics.com
41. A PERFECT HOSTESS GIFT
If you want to give your host a little of everything, this Chicks Mix
collection includes a candle, shower gel, lip balm, tea, chocolates,
trinkets and cards with words of wisdom. $25, lightmyfiregifts.com

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49. ULTIMATE GREEN ODOR EATER
Rub this Stainless Steel Soap between your hands and find
that the garlic smell on your paws goes away. $10, uncommongoods.com
42. FERRIS WHEEL BIRDFEEDER
Hummingbirds will delight in this triple Red Ferris Wheel
Birdfeeder. $55, uncommongoods.com

50. SAVE THE PLANET, SAVE THE DUCT TAPE
Have fun creating a one-of-a-kind wallet from this Do-ItYourself Duct Tape Kit. $20, myductbills.com

43. THE ULTIMATE RECYCLED LAMP
New Orleans-based Unique Products creatively fashioned
this Green Gain Pig Laundry Lamp from empty bottles of
detergent and a lot of chutzpah. They're sure to brighten up
any room with color and humor. $30, letsgetup.com

51. CLEAN BUT GREEN
The Wonderwash is a pressure compact washing machine that uses 90 percent less detergent and water than
conventional models. Portable and compact, the Wonderwash and the Countertop Spin Dryer are perfect for
apartment living, RV dwellers, students or anyone who
wants an environmentally friendly washer. $43 and up,
laundry-alternative.com

44. RENEWABLE RESOURCE
New Balance's CoCoNa Run Jacket is made of coconut shell
and natural fibers, which combat UV rays and keep you warm,
dry and chafe-free. $70, coconafabrics.com
45. RECYLCED HURRICANE WEAR
New Orleanians have little love for FEMA but you've got
to dig their nearly indestructible tarps, which have been
turned bags. $30, letsgetup.com
46. BILLS, BILLS, BILLS
Made from ecofriendly material, the sleek Tope Version
3 Wallet-which is also vegan, enviro-friendly and animal
free-sports super cool graphics like this landscape design,
which looks like it belongs on an old k.d. lang album cover.
$48, dbclay.com
47. WIPE YOUR FEET
These monkeys offer guests a playful reminder to speak no
evil with the Monkey See doormat. As with all Uncommon
Goods purchases, partial proceeds will benefit a charity.
$30, uncommongoods.com
48. CREDIT GRANTED
These whimsicle Take Charge earrings are made of reclaimed
credit cards and sterling silver. $12, replayground.com

56. FAMILY GUY FREAl<IN' PARTY COLLECTION
The most complete collection of Family Guy episodes
you could ever purchase, includes five seasons. Make it a
Family Guy game night with the ping pong or poker sets,
which are both included along with the DVD set. Store
your favorite show in the collectible carrying case for
organized season marathons. $105, fox.com
57. HELLO LEELA
Who can save the world from alien Internet scammers?
The first Futurama movie, Bender's Big Score, is set to
appease fans who are still hating on Fox. The secret to
time travel is tattooed on Fry's ass and one-eyed, shouldbe-a-lesbian Leela finds true love. $20, fox.com
58. SPIDER PIG, SPIDER PIG
Doh! ... The Simpsons are back with a movie. Sure to be
a classic, the DVD packs in special features: comments,
deleted scenes, and funny stuff like "Homer's Monologue
on the Tonight Show" and "The Simpsons Judge American Idol." $30, fox.com
59. DOING TIME THE LESBIAN WAY
Hothead Paison is back, baby. At least in calendar form.
$20, hotheadpaison.com

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60. CINEMA LOVERS UNITE
Decorate your wall with the kinky 2008 Dykesploitation wall calendar, which features a different vintage film
poster each month. $19, dykesploitation.com
61. WE LOVE NEW YORK (GIRLS)
Twelve queer Brooklyn girls pose at Coney Island in swimsuits made by Brooklyn designers in the I Heart Brooklyn
Girls calendar, which revisions traditional pin-up through a
lezzie lens. $15, iheartbrooklyngirls.com

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62. WE LOVE HELEN MIRREN
Own the conclusion of the hit crime drama,
Prime Suspect 7: The Final Act, in which
Oscar-winner Helen Mirren is soon-to-retire
Detective Superintendent Jane Tennison who
must solve the mystery of missing 14-year-old
Sallie Sturdy. $30, acornmedia.com
63. SLEUTHING HOUSEWIFE
Patricia Routledge headlines this cool BBC
mystery series Hetty Wainthropp Investigates: The
Complete Collection. With a teenage apprentice in
tow, Hetty gets to the bottom of the investigation
with justice and empathy. $150, acornmedia.com
64. SECOND ROUND OF BIG LOVE
Who outed America's favorite polygamists in the
gay-produced Big Love? Who knows, but the second
season of this fictional family's struggle to stay mum
and save face in Salt Lake City is a perfect gift for
the closeted Love addict in your life. $60, hbo.com
65. MYSTERIOUS WOMAN WRITER
Let the suspense thrill you with set 2 of The Ruth
Rendell Mysteries. Dubbed the Queen of Crime,
Rendell is one of the most acclaimed modern crime
writers-female or male. $50, acornmedia.com

December 2007

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66. GET YOUR SLING ON, GIRLS
Ice it up with Fuzzydude.com's Sparkly Gun and Handcuff
necklaces, Sling Cherries pin and Batty Pink broach. $13
and up, fuzzydude.com
67. PAINTED PIZAZZ
These two boy shirts from SAAZ Designs feature their
paint spill look and are embroidered around the cuffs and
hems. $70, saazdesigns.com
68. A BRACELET SHANE WOULD LOVE
This beautiful Bone Cuff bracelet from Love and Pride's
L Word Collection is edgy enough for Shane and pretty
enough for Jenny. $495, loveandpride.com
69. HEART ON YOUR SLEEVE (ER, BELT)
Phoenix's queer clothier Tomcat's new Corazon Belt
Buckle is a must for any babe. $17, tomcatthreads.com
70. MADE BY LESBIANS FOR LESBIANS
Debri Field is an online store for "individuals who enjoy
mixing fashion, politics, sexuality and plain old silliness."
Well, that's us to a t(ee). Our faves are the Mudflap Girl,
Pirate Ponytail, Gender and especially the Mrs. DeGeneres
T-shirts. Even better: Wooden Earrings in Kitty or Deer
prints. $10 and up, debrifield.com
71. GIDDYUP PARTNERS
Liz Rosino, owner, operator, designer and seamstress
extraordinaire behind LuckyKat, is our new guru. Our
editor lost her mind over this sexy Western Skull Dress
in lightweight black twill with skull bandana print. Get the
tattoo look without the needles. $70, luckykat.net

44

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72. 2Q2BEAT
No tofu was harmed in the making of this "Soy Friendly" shirt.
Asian-inspired cartoons are just
as sweet and silly as your gal pal.
$22, spicybrown.com
73. WHERE YOU FROM?
You'll start the conversation
before it even begins with these
region-repping tees embalzoned with East Coast, Deep
South, Midwest and more. San
Francisco's Citizen Body makes
these tees for cuties all over the
country. $23, citizenbody.com
74. THE OUT-LAW TUXEDO SHIRT
Fancy business in front, party in the back, kinda like a
mullet. So cute, Rigged Out/Fitters Outlaw Pistols Tuxedo
Shirt will have you fighting off dyke admirers in droves.
Not enough? Get her Rigged's Customizable Tuxedo Shirt
with your own words and tattoo-inspired images. $45,
riggedoutfit.com

(/)
75. NO BAG NECESSARY
All you really need for a night out (cash
and ID) will fit in this sexy leather cuff
that doubles as a wallet. This lesbiandesigned wrist wallet is a Sheryl Crow
fave. $88, wilmawor1d.com
76. LISTENING IN STYLE
You Go Gir1iPod Black Jeweled Ear
Loops work with any digital music
source-CD players, iPod, even an
old school cassette player-and come
decked with pink Austrian crystals.
Other styles and colors available. $20,
u-go-g.com
77. KEEP YOUR CRITTERS CLOSE
The popular furry Fun Friends now
offers Plush iPod Covers in tweenfriendly characters like hippo,
penguin, koala and more. $10,
funfriends.com
78. PLAY ANYTIME!
Tote your childhood game faves on
your grown-up keys. These nostalgic
toys aren't just for looks, you can
really play on them! Scrabble, Etcha-Scetch, Rubix Cube, Clue, even
Operation! Who knew you could stuff
a whole board game into a stocking?
Now you can with Ultimate Key Chains
picks. $3-$6, ultimatekeychains.com

I

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e,
79. METAL PEN-WRITING IN METAL
No ink, no smudging, no sharpening
with this crazy pen made of a metal
alloy that leaves a mark on most types
of paper. Fashioned like the styluses
of Leonardo da Vinci, Durer and Rembrandt, this pen won't wear down.
$30, grand-illusions.com
80. STICK IT TO HIM
Be a voodoo seamstress with this
awesome "Stick
it to Bush" pin
cushion. $7, gerberadesigns.com.
81. DANCEDANCE REVOLUTION
An Asian-centric stocking stuffer
we adore: Momjii (our fave is called
dancedancedance). Hidden inside every
doll is a tiny folded card for your own
special message. $15, firebox.com
82. HEEL, GIRL
Keep your bedroom door open with
this sexy Foot in the Door stopper.
$15, firebox.com

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83. DE-STRESS YO'SELF
Featuring Deepak Chopra, Andrew Weil and Dean Ornish,
Healing Rhythms's Biofeedback Training Program has
over 30 mind-body exercises to train your body to activate, balance, release and recover for optimal health.
$300, wilddivine.com
84. HOOK IT UP, DJ
Already have a sweet sound system, but need a way
to hook up your iPod? The iPort FS-2 allows you
to attach your iPod to your TV to play videos, and
computer or stereo speakers to play music. Have your
friends bring over their iPods with playlists and take
turns DJ-ing all night. $150, iportmusic.com
85. A TECHNOLOGICAL GENIUS
Samsung's Q1 Ultra mobile PC with mini 7-inch
screen is smaller than a laptop, bigger than a PDA.
It's faster and holds more memory than a PDA, has
full PC functionality, allows access to Bluetooth,
e-mail and Internet, and has a webcam. $1155 and
up, samsung.com
86. SNAP-HAPPY
What's not to love about the new Camera Exilim EX
588ORD? A piece of art in itself, highly intuitive and light
as a feather, this camera is smaller than a video iPod, and
can make YouTube ready videos, it's already formatted.
You're your favorite mode of creative expression. $280
and up, exilim.casio.com
87. CHEAP SKATE
Carpeting is no fun because you can't slide on it! The
tragedy of carpeted floors can be overcome with Fun
Slides, carpet skates made to be worn over athletic
shoes for friction resistance fun. Available in blue, green,
silver, red, purple and hot pink. $20, funslides.com
88. V-CAST MOBILE T-PHONE BY VERIZON
Remember when they added cameras, Bluetooth and
MP3s to cell phones and you thought it couldn't get any
better? Well, it has. The LGVX9400 not only does all those
things, but it also gets TV. No downloading or anything.
And it has a large color display, so you may never watch
your home set again. (price varies, lgusa.com)

46

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89. TINY AND FAST
Check out the smallest scanner ever! The size of a
pen (8 inches), the portable Docupen Scanner Pen
model Color RC 800, scans an entire page of text and
graphics in just four seconds. It stores up to 100 pages
in 2 megabites of flash memory, only weighs 2 ounces
and has rechargeable batteries. $300, planon.com
90. WHO NEEDS A PORTABLE DVD PLAYER
The Zen Vision multimedia center will let you view photos, music, TV and videos. You can also listen to the radio, record your voice, and get organized with a personal
calendar. $300, us.creative.com
91. IT'S NOT ALL ABOUT APPLE
In an age of feigned enlightenment, even your MP3
player can be Zen. Maybe the bright happy colors of the
Zen Stone Plus MP3 player will awaken you. If not, this
MP3 player will still set you apart from the crowd. $70,
us.creative.com

Tasty Treats
A little sweet, a little spice, homemade food gifts are really nice.

By Vanessa Barrington
Just when you think you can relax and enjoy the holidays, another gift~giving
event pops up. If you hate the thought of hitting the stores in a desperate
search for the one thing that will perfectly express your regard for your new
lover's sister or the person whose name you drew at the office, you might
consider going the DIY route. Spending a little time in the kitchen is a good
way to savor the moment, save money and inject a little meaning into what
can be a soulless cacophony of commerce. After all, everyone loves food and
food gifts are so easily repurposed (never say re~gifted). Your recipient may
take your gift to a party and share it with people you don't know. But does it
matter? Your spirit of generosity just keeps radiating outward.
Spending your time and energy instead of dollars makes homemade gifts
rewarding in a way that those hastily purchased generic gifts can never be.
Spread the joy by turning the gift making into an event. Invite friends over,
serve drinks and snacks and make big batches of jam, chutney, spiced vinegar,

Nutty Cranberry Maple Granola

Sweet and Spicy Pecans

Ingredients

Ingredients

Ingredients

1 pound granulated white sugar
2 vanilla beans

2 cups kamut (or other cereal grain) flakes
2 cups rolled oats
1/2 cup sesame seeds
1 cup sunflower seeds
1/2 cup sliced almonds
1 cup dried cranberries
1/2 cup mild vegetable oil
1/2 cup maple syrup
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

6 tablespoons butter (plus more to butter
baking sheets)
6 tablespoons water
11/4 cups packed brown sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
3 teaspoons ground ginger
1 1/2 teaspoons ground cayenne
1 1/2 teaspoons ground cardamom
3/4 teaspoon nutmeg
6 cups shelled pecan halves

Fair warning: You can't make this overnight.
It takes two weeks for the vanilla to flavor
the sugar.

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Put the sugar in a large bowl. With a sharp
paring knife, cut the vanilla beans open
from end to end, without cutting all the
way through. Using the knife, scrape the
vanilla seeds into the sugar, mixing with
your hands and using your fingertips to
distribute the vanilla
seeds evenly. Add the
pods to the sugar and
transfer to a large jar.
Shake every couple of
days for two weeks to
give the vanilla time to
thoroughly perfume the
sugar. Remove the pods and add them to
another pound of sugar for your own use.
They will keep on flavoring the sugar for
months. You can even keep adding sugar
as you use it up. Package it up in little jars
with handmade hangtags printed with usage suggestions like "great on French toast
and pancakes" or "extra sweet in coffee
and cocoa."

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hefty mugs.
The three recipes below are a great place to start. If the thought of
sterilizing jars and processing them in .water makes you want to run for
the nearest mall, fear not. Each of these recipes is shelf~stable, requires
no preserving and will last at least a few weeks when stored properly.

Vanilla Sugar

(Makes 1 pound)

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cookies, candy or any of the recipes below.
One visit to the store and a few hours in the kitchen and you can have
a nice stockpile of gifts when you need to give one unexpectedly. You might
even enjoy yourself so much that you'll choose to overlook the commercial
side of the holidays and make gifts for everyone on your list.
Even if your craftiness doesn't extend to the culinary arts, you can still
give wonderful gifts of food. Pour your creativity into the packaging. Pair
up a nice jar of jam with muffin mix and package them both up with muffin
tins. Combine hot chocolate mix with gourmet marshmallows and a set of

For a variation, add cinnamon, nutmeg or
other spices. Stores indefinitely.

(Makes about 8 cups)

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. In a
small saucepan, over medium-low heat,
warm the oil, maple syrup, and vanilla
extract. Do not boil. In a large bowl,
combine the kamut flakes, oats, sesame
seeds, sunflower seeds, almonds and
cranberries. Toss to mix.
Pour the maple syrup
mixture over the dry
ingredients and toss until
they're evenly and lightly
coated.
Transfer the mixture to a
large baking sheet and
spread out evenly. Bake
for 15 to 20 minutes. Stop
halfway through and stir the ingredients so
they brown evenly. Let them cool completely in the pan. Pack granola up in a
decorative bag and tie it with a ribbon, or
decorate little paper bags with stamps or
seasonal ephemera. Store in an airtight
container for up to two weeks.

(Makes 6 cups)
Preheat the oven to
350 degrees F. Lightly
butter two baking
sheets.
In a large skillet over
medium heat, melt the
butter. Add the water, brown sugar, salt,
ginger, cayenne, cardamom, and nutmeg.
With a wooden spoon, stir just until the
sugar dissolves. Add the nuts to the sugar
mixture and cook, stirring, until the nuts
are coated, about five minutes. Transfer to
the buttered baking sheets, spreading the
nuts out in a single layer and dividing them
evenly between the two sheets. Bake for
about 10 minutes, until golden and crisp.
Let cool in the pan.
Perfect for snacking or adding to salads.
Package up in little cellophane bags tied
with a ribbon. Store in an airtight container
for up to two weeks.

DIV Holiday Gifts
Put those old CDs and DVDs to work again.

Text and photos by Margaret Coble
Whether you're the crafty type or not, it's always fun
to give handmade holiday presents to your friends and
family. And recycling things that would otherwise end up
in the landfill is always a good idea. So why not combine
these two concepts and make some easily customizable
holiday ornaments out of all the old CDs sitting around
your home? Scratched-up home-burns, dead DVDs and
those free promotional CDs that come in the mail are
perfect for this project.

YOU WILL NEED:
CDs/DVDs

drill with 3/16-inch bit
fine grit sand paper
respirator
gray primer enamel spray paint
enamel spray paint in other colors
stencil on cardstock or acetate
X-acto knife
spray adhesive (optional)
glitter
spray-on clear gloss
silver elastic cord
scissors

1. Prep your CD by first wiping off any dirt or grease that might be on it.
Next, use a drill with a small bit (preferably 3/16,inch), to drill a hole near
the edge of each ornament you intend to make. (You'll be looping some
elastic cord through it later, to hang it by.) Don't get too close to the edge or
the CD might crack; about 1/8,inch from the edge is good. If you don't get
a good, clean hole, use a little sandpaper to sand around the edges to make
it smooth.
2. Next, set yourself up somewhere where you can spray,paint, preferably
somewhere with good ventilation, like outdoors, in a garage or at least
somewhere with an exhaust fan. Prep a surface to paint on by putting down
newspapers, cardboard or something else to keep the paint off of everything.
Wear clothes you don't mind getting paint on, and use latex gloves if you
don't want paint on your hands. And always use a respirator over your face,
if possible. Paint fumes are nothing to fool around with.
The first step is to spray the disc with some gray enamel primer to cover
up any writing or printing that might be on the face of the CD, and to make
a better surface for the paint to adhere to. Try to keep the spray can at least
6 inches away from the CD's surface, and keep your hand moving back and
forth, laying down light layers of paint until you have full coverage or else
you might end up with big globs of paint that will drip and be uneven.
3. Let the primer dry thoroughly, and repeat if you can still anything through
it. Depending on the weather where you are and the environment you are
working in, it might take a few minutes or up to a few hours for the primer
to dry. Once you' re sure it is thoroughly dry, do the other side of the disc
and let it dry.
Now would be a good time to get your stencil ready. If you can draw or
are able to manipulate images in a graphics program on your computer, just
turn your favorite object or picture into a silhouette, and fit it into a 5,inch
circle. It might take some trial and error, but with some patience, you can
create an infinite number of designs, from simple geometric shapes to ani,
mals to symbols or anything, really!

4Sjcurve

4. If you're not confident in your drawing skills or your aptitude for computer graphics,
then you can download my template for the bird stencil shown here on cuRvE's Web site
and print it out on cardstock or acetate (a transparency sheet), and then carefully cut it
out with an X,acto knife. I've added a few little wavy lines to give the bird some motion.

5. Back to the CDs. Once both sides are dry, spray on a layer of color, whichever you
choose as your background color. For mine, I'm choosing engine red. Remember to spray
lightly, back and forth, building layers until you have complete coverage. While the paint
is still wet, carefully sprinkle a small amount of glitter onto the disc, preferably in a con,
trasting color. This way, when the paint dries, it will glue the glitter onto the surface of
the disc.

6. When your CD is thoroughly dry, take your stencil and line it up with the disc. This
can be tricky if it's not on acetate (which is see,through), but you can get the placement
right by using your fingers to feel the edges of the disc through the sheet of paper. A very
light dusting of spray adhesive is optional here, on the back of the stencil. It will help keep
the stencil adhered to the disc and give you a better print from the spray paint. But if you
use too much, it might also make the stencil stick to the disc, causing paint or glitter to
come off when you remove the stencil. So use it sparingly if you have to, just enough to
barely tack the stencil down. (Another reason why it's very important for all the coats of
paint to be absolutely dry before you print the stencil.)
7. Once the stencil is in place, use a contrasting color of spray paint to spray on your
design. I've choosen a bright yellow.When you're sure you've got sufficient coverage on all
the open areas of the stencil, lift the stencil up off the disc carefully, without touching it
to the wet paint. Again, it might tak some trial and error to get it right, but once you do,
you'll be able to replicate the process easily.
While the paint is still wet, you can again sprinkle on some more glitter. Some of the
glitter from the first layer will have been covered with paint, so I usually go for the second
layer; it adds texture.

8. Let it dry thoroughly. Repeat the process on the other side if you want a two,sided
ornament. If you only want a one,sided ornament, you can leave the back painted with
just the background color. Or you can skip that step entirely and leave the shiny side of
the disc blank, as the back, if it's not too scratched up.
When the paint is thoroughly dry, use clear gloss for a top coat, which will help seal
the glitter again. Spray a very thin layer, or it might get cloudy. Just enough to give it a
shine!
When it's all completely dry, it's time to thread the elastic cord through the hole for
hanging. You can use other materials to hang it by-ribbon, yarn, thread, twine, mono,
filament, etc. I like silver elastic cord; it's cheap, easily found at any. fabric store, and is
festive. I cut about an 8,inch piece and make a slipknot through the hole, tying off the
other end.
And voila! A highly personal, handmade, recycled holiday ornament is yours. Make them
for yout'self or your friends and family. Change up the colors, the glitter, or the designs for
an infinite variety of possibilities. Hang the ornaments on your tree, on the wall, or from
the ceiling, or string several of them together for a mobile. Happy holiday recycling!

To see more examplesof Mags' ornamentdesigns,or to purchasesome of her own handmade
recycledornamentsor her othercraftywares,visit her Web site, artbymags.com.
December 2007

I49

Behind·the Scenes of

an

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Television's queerest gothic soap opera
offers a lesbian threesome never before
seen on TV. By Jennifer Corday

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The
rd season of Dante's Cove has a mysterious and vibrant lesbian buzz,
with w characters, new magic spells and some hot lesbian sex scenes that
will
ely pique your interest. here! Networks, home to the drama series, is
now lulablethrough subscription in over 40 million homes across the United
States and, according to Senior Vice President of Original Programming
Meredith Kadlec, the third season of Dante's Cove will be groundbreaking."We
have some great new additions to the cast and we have some really great writers
and actors. I think this is our signature series:•
Here! is battling Logo to be the flagship of gay TV and is well ahead of
the industry in creating gay-themed shows for prime time. Even better: Dante's
Cove is the first ever prime-time show starring three out lesbian actors playing
three out lesbian characters, programmed by-you got it-a lesbian executive.
"How great that our community has gotten to a place where a lesbian
producer is talking to lesbian actors about what to do in a lesbian scene for
lesbian viewers;' says Kadlec.
The series stars out actors Michelle Wolff, Jill Bennett and Jenny Shimizu
in a love triangle, which required some interesting casting. Wolff plays Brit,
the tall, muscular scuba buff (who looks hot in a bathing suit, I must add),
whose role will be much more developed this season. 'Tm not the bartender
anymore;' Wolff explains. "I guess she decided to give that up:' Brit is now a
full-time oceanographer, with a new girlfriend played by model-turned-actress
Shimizu. The two butch women form a sexy and unique couple not commonly
represented on screen.
"Both of us are, and play, androgynous women;' says Wolff. "I thought it
was a really interesting choice to go with that. In terms of film and TV, you
rarely see two butch women together:'
Shimizu agrees. "From an actor's point of view I thought it was a good
choice to have two really strong characters coming together. We're both independent and secure in our own sexuality. You rarely see that represented on
TV: Realistically, I think a lot of lesbians, in L.A. and New York at least, are
attracted to similar styles:•
Shimizu plays Elena, an antique dealer vacationing at Dante's Cove, only
to fall for the sexy diver. "I wasn't familiar with the show so I met Michelle
(Wolff] on the set. I think it's better that way:' Shimizu made the jump from
modeling to acting and is enjoying the work on Dante's Cove. 'i\cting is a little
more exciting because you get to interact with other people. I really like that
here! casts different types of people and I had been wanting to work with them
for a long time:'
Newcomer Bennett plays Michelle, who stepped in this season to replace
Erin Cummings in the role. "The timing just worked out perfectly;' explains
Bennett, who had already played the role of Grace in the pilot, which never
aired. Because of scheduling difficulties, she missed the boat on seasons one
and two, but was called back to audition for the part of Michelle. "It was very
last-minute. It's never fun to be the person swooping in and replacing someone,
but thankfully I already knew some of the cast members and Michelle (Wolff]
and I were already good friends:' The sexy brunette beat out over 200 actresses
competing for the role, and is thrilled to have landed the part.
"There was obviously something that I was doing that they liked. And because I am gay I think I really connected with the character:' Bennett says she
believes the gay community is hungry for representation and is proud to be one
of very few out lesbian actors in Los Angeles.

The character of Michelle was formerly played by a more vulnerable actor, so she had to make some acljustments. Replacing a recurring
character isn't always the network's first choice, but soap operas can get
away with it. "Because the character underwent a major transformation
between season two and season three, it worked out;' Bennett says."They
didn't have time to rewrite. They were in a panic. I was reading the script
as I was flying to Hawaii. I got to the set at 10 p.m. Sunday night and at 8
a.m. the next day I was filming:'
To make things more difficult, she hadn't actually seen the show.
Bennett had her work cut out for her, but she impressed everyone with
her professionalism. "Stylistically, it's, well, a supernatural erotic-thriller
soap opera-and it's also a comedy. So more than anything, I was concerned about getting the style of it;' she says.
The style is quirky, magical and truly entertaining-Buffy the Vampire
Slayer meets Baywatch. "It's campy, ic's fun and it's completely addictive;'
says Wolff. "It's a guilty pleasure-basically a gay soap opera:'
And what's a soap opera without a few steamy love scenes? Season
three won't let you down, with some very sexy bedroom footage of the
ladies-not all at once, but in an interesting montage of flashbacks and
fantasy.
Jumping into bed on camera is ofren an actor's job, but was an especially interesting and exciting process. "Filming a love scene is based on
trust;' says Bennett. 'i\nd it's going to come across if people are holding
back:' Doing a love scene with her friend Wolff was admittedly a little
odd. "It was weird in that we're friends, and she's also friends with my
girlfriend. But because of our friendship, there's absolutely no question
that we trust each other;' Bennett says."We were not going to do anything
to make each other uncomfortable. We had a glass of wine beforehand
and sort of relaxed and said OK, let's do this:'
The girls also had a pre-scene talk where they set some boundaries. They
discussed what they would like to see on screen."We wanted to see realistic
love scenes, not two uncomfortable straight girls pawing at each other;' says
Bennett. Though she acknowledges any great actor can pull off a great sex
scene, she feels real lesbians have a slight edge.'Tuere's a reason why Leisha
Hailey's love scenes look better than everyone else'son TheL Word:'
Kadlec agrees. "Not to say there haven't been outstanding lesbian
scenes conceived by straight women, but we as lesbians know best what
we want to see. It's the mind connection that makes it hot, the build-up
and the undressing of each other;' she says. "I think the hottest scenes in
the movie Bound were when they were flirting in the elevator, and the part
with them sitting on the couch. Sure, the hard-core is hot too, but I think
what women really find erotic is the intense unveiling of each other:'
Gay director Sam Irvin admitted he had no idea what to tell the
women to do in bed. "He left it up to us;' says Wolff. "So it was great
working with Jenny and Jill. We all know what looks good and hot and
sexy:' The love triangle will undoubtedly set the stage for some delicious
lesbian drama in season three, making Dante's Cove a possible new fave for
those of us craving some prime-time fun.
'Tm really proud to be on the show;' Wolff beams. "The writing is
great this year and all the characters really have some depth, so it's much
more interesting. We all interact with one another, so it really feels like
an ensemble:'
Kadlec is equally excited and confident that the series will get picked
up for another season. "We gauge the reaction to the show based on a variety of things;' she says.'Tm thinking we'll want to bring it back. I'm just
really excited to get this season out there to have people see it:' ■

December 2007

I51

EEN YEARS since the mega~surge of Paula Cole. After hitting the
stratosphere of popularity with songs like "Where Have All the
Gone" and "I Don't Want to Wait;' Cole needed a break from
the roller coaster life. She got married, had a daughter and went through a
tumultuous divorce. She returns to the music scene on her own terms with her
new album, Courage,a new attitude and a heck of a lot of perspective. Cole first
caught our attention in 1994 with the release of the achingly honest Harbinger,
which is home to the heartrending'Tm So Ordinary:' Tue following year, This
Firespawned several hits and life as Cole knew it was forever changed. Cole is
also a proud veteran of the first Lilith Fair tour in 1997.
Let me ask you about Lilith Fair. What do you think about when you
recall that time and being part of that tour?

I was at the very first show of Lilith Fair, and I was even at the shows with
Sarah [McLachlan] kind of leading up to Lilith Fair, when it was gestat~
ing in our minds. I was her open.ing act in '95 in theaters for the Fumbling
TowardsEcstasytour and I would go out on stage every night and thank
her for having me, another female artist, on the bill-because it was so rare
at the time.
What are some of your most cherished memories from Lilith?

One, the audiences were just amazing. There was something special in the
air-especially before the media got ahold of it-when it was just ours.
They sold out and the audiences were cool and left and it was our precious
little entity and there was so much love in the air. Lilith Fair definitely had
some of the best audiences I've ever felt. Two, the feeling I got in my bones
and heart when we were able to give back to some of the local women's
organizations. Three was being able to meet some of my fellow artists. In
particular, Emmylou Harris.
What, if any, was your fear or anxiety level when releasing Courage as far as how it was going to be received, and how did you feel
about this in comparison to your other records?
I definitely felt scared and wondered if anyone still cared or remembered. On
the other hand, I embrace my age, and I've liv~d enough life that I have
some kind of Buddhist sense of unattachment. I want to come into this
more humbly, so that everyone knows I'm in it for the marathon, not the
sprint. I want to be doing this into my 70s because I need to. I need music.
I'm in it to make honest, meaningful, unique art.
So how much does it crack you up that people can have Paula Cole
ringtones on their cell phones, if they're so inclined?
It's so, so funny. [Laughs.]I'm in a different world now. They have ringtone
charts, download charts, American Idol and MySpace. It's really a differ~
ent landscape. I don't know how I feel about it. I feel like I'm really like a
singeMongwriter who should have had her heyday in the '70s. I'm in the
wrong era.
When you say that, it makes me think of "Lonelytown" from the new
record. I read that you were the queen of the high school musical
and that song made me think of the Cole Porter, George Gershwin,
etc. songbooks.
I have a lot of roots in jazz, and I wanted to be a jazz singer for a while.
Sometimes I loved the songs and sometimes they really didn't feel authen ~

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tic, especially as a female. I had to sing [a song] in high school and I had
to wear a negligee and high heels and I'm 16, parading my little body in
this tarty outfit, singing"! Enjoy Being a Girl;' and I'm thinking about the
lyrics. They're still so absurd to me. It kind of had an impact. All these
paralyzing statements of womanhood, Billie Holiday singing about men
who beat her, "But I Love Him;' and I just didn't want to sing those songs,
I didn't want to be part of that. I wanted to write my truth that felt more
meaningful to today.
Moving on to another song from Courage, "Hard to Be Soft."

It's kind of like my "Cowboys;' part two, although nobody would probably get
that because it's a bossa nova and it has these complex chord changes. But
it's like exploration of gender roles-in a lighthearted way-and so I kind
of think of it as a continuation of that thinking, which I actually think
about a lot in my life. It's nice to have this conversation in an interview,
because I don't normally go there in interviews.
Well, here we are.
Yeah. It's nice. I wanted to sing and explore thoughts behind a woman being
the breadwinner and being altogether kind of dominant in the world and
then coming home and being maybe passive in a home situation and also
the role of a man. It's hard to be a woman in the world who's so strong and
then come home and be soft. It's also hard for a man to be in the world and
be perceived in a soft light.
You must be aware you have a huge lesbian following; we have good
taste in music. And although I don't have it on my fridge, I'm sure
there are some gals out there with that famous pie of you and Sarah
Mclachlan smooching.
Oh, really?
I once read that Sarah Mclachlan was amused by people wondering
about her sexuality. She really got a kick out of it. Was it anything
that you ever got a kick out of, people speculating about you?
Oh, I love it. I've been with men, but I love women, I'm attracted to women. I
love them. I love my lesbian following. I feel at home there. I think the soul
is androgynous, and I love women that have a strong animus and I love
men that have strong anima. I'm reluctant to categorize. I fall in love with
the soul inside the body.
You just put out this new record, and you're entering into this
whole new phase of your career and your life. What are your coping
mechanisms?
I know that the people around me will manage my career much better than
before. I feel safer, that I'm in better hands as I go into the world, and
sometimes I'm scared. I'm a hermetic, introverted person. My music heals
me. I couldn't be without it. I have a responsibility to keep doing it. I hope I
can make a little difference in the world with it-that's why I'm here. I just
hope I can braid a personal life harmoniously with a career. I wasn't able to
do that before, and I've learned some hard lessons, and I hope that I have a
happy home life and a long, meaningful career.
I don't think that's really asking for too much.
I'll walk this path and I'll see what happens. I don't know. But I thank you for
your intelligent questions, and I'm really proud and glad to be part of an
interview for CURVE. ■

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Networking Lesbians
Three women find the MySpace connection. By Kyra Thomson
!though the invitation to "see who knows who, or how you are

While Hamilton was setting up her first MySpace account in California,

connected" may sound like the theme of your next local lesbian

Web designer and filmmaker Ruth Selwyn was following a similar path in

event, it's actually a line used by MySpace.com to successfully

Tel Aviv,Israel. A friend suggested that she join MySpace to get support from

encourage an average of 230,000 new people to join its social
networking site each day. MySpace skyrocketed to fame when it launched in
2004 and now ranks as the sixth most visited site in the world, according to

other filmmakers and possibly find a girlfriend. However, faced with a blank
MySpace page, Selwyn Googled "lesbian animation;' and was disappointed
with the results. "I figured there was a hole in the market;' she recalls, "and

Internet traffic analysis company Alexa.
However, just as it was with the first fax machines, a communication trend

fantasized about filling it:'
Selwyn satisfied this need by combining her skills as a Flash

A

doesn't develop unless everyone is onboard. When Arlan Hamilton first

animator, her experiences as a filmmaker and her opinions

jumped on the MySpace bandwagon, it was at the encouragement of a
friend who had discovered the Web site and wanted others to join her

about being a lesbian to create the out-and-proud animation
sensation Lizzy the Lezzy.
"Afrer she was drawn, I recorded some text about being

online. Hamilton eventually used this virtual community to successfully sell T-shirts bearing slogans such as"Shane is my HOMOgirl;' and
to promote her music magazine Interlude."I realized;' she explains, "that

a lesbian and animated her mouth;' explains Selwyn. "Every
TV program has a theme song so the idea for a song came next,

MySpace was the easiest way to reach people who would be interested in
its content:'

and episode one was complete:' The 2-D delight was uploaded onto
her page. Lizzy declared, 'Tm a muff muncher!" to the online world,

This interest and popularity encouraged Hamilton to develop the

and her popularity grew.

blog Your Daily Lesbian Moment, which now attracts thousands of readers each day. "Being able to reach so many people with a push of a button

Meanwhile, in Texas, Steph Stance was also noticing a virtual gap in lesbian representation when it came to YouTube.com

is really astounding and beautiful to me;' says Hamilton.

vlogging or personal video biogs. Founded in 2005, YouTube is currently ranked as the fourth most frequently visited Web site in the

Lizzy the
Lezzy

world, and is the leader in online video viewing and sharing.

Our Top Eight ... Er, 10
We pick out favorites for how to get and stay connected on the Web.
Admit it. You have a profile on at least one if not three or four
of these sites. It all starts with that one little invite, and the next
thiJlg you know you're surfing OurChart for a date, checking out
a new band on MySpace and updating your resume on GLEE. A
recent Harris lnteractive/Witeck-Combs survey showed that queer
women use social networking sites much more than straight gals.
While sites like YouTube and Craigslist are visited most often, we
prefer this crop of gay-friendly sites. - Katie Peoples

Bebo: They call themselves the next generation of social networking, and indeed Bebo is a pretty site. It boasts a clean design
with all the features we've come to know and love, and Bebo
welcomes input from users when developing new features.
FabFemme: Ladies only. FabFemme is social networking for lesbian and bisexual women who want to make friends in new areas, or
find a date. The site has an invite feature that allows you to invite
people in your network to hang out outside the virtural world.
Facebook: Aimed at the college set, Facebook has become one of
the top 10 most visited sites on the Web. With tons of applications,
there are endless possibilities for customizing your profile page.
Flickr: A photo-centric Web site, Flickr makes creating and sharing albums easy. It's also a great place to see work by amateur
and professional photographers or privately share your photos
with family across the country.

GLEE: Gay, Lesbian and Everyone Else, like Community Connect
Inc. 's other niche social networking sites {BlackPlanet, AsianAve
and MiGente), has professional and personal networking, and
news feeds specific to the LGBT community running on its site.
One of the fastest-growing gay sites, GLEE boasts over 20,000
members and 700,000 page views since June 2007.
lmeem: A different spin on the networking concept, lmeem is
music-centric. Here users can find new music, video and photos,
or upload their own work for people to share.
Linkedln: For a more professional way of introducing yourself to
a potential employer, try Linkedln, the Internet's answer to doing
lunch.
MySpace: The largest and most popular networking site,
MySpace set the standard for Internet socializing.
Olivia: Olivia.com raised some brows when it announced it would
launch its own social networking site, Olivia.com/Connect. But
this lifestyle company certainly caters to its target audience with
travel tips and news on upcoming performances.
OurChart: The lesbian networking site may have seemed like a
TV spinoff or a clever marketing ploy, but this site has skyrocketed s_inceits launch in January 2007. It has biogs, comments and
photo albums, but it's the visual web of your chart that makes
it fun.

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Stance became curious about the site after
seeing a story about YouTube on TV, and began watching other people's videos. "Although
there were many talented people from all
walks of life represented on YouTube, I could
not find even one lesbian vlogger;' she reflects.
That's when Stance decided to contribute to
this online community she describes as "without boundaries or limitations" by filming her
opinions and initiating dialogue about various
topics with her viewers.
Through her YouTube page, Stance is able
to voice LGBT concerns to a broader audience, with the hope of fostering greater tolerance. "YouTube is a new frontier that offers enormous opportunity for making connections. If you want to show off your talents and gain visibility, it's the
best place in cyberspace to start:'
Though separated geographically, these three opinionated women are as
easily connected as MySpace promised they would be. Stance eventually set
up a MySpace account to promote her YouTube site, while Selwyn added
Lizzy episodes to YouTube in order to introduce people to her MySpace
page. Hamilton mentioned Lizzy on her blog, which sent thousands more
MySpace users to Selwyn's site. Among Lizzy's new fans were the creators
of LWord Online.com, who asked Selwyn to create an L Word-themed Lizzy
episode. From there Selwyn's audience grew even more, until she was noticed

and approached by Stance to appear in
her vlog. A video of Lizzy the Lezzy
wearing one of Hamilton's famous
shirts and encouraging viewers to help
Hamilton find a mate completed the
connection.
Another thing all three lesbian online celebrities have in common is their
use of this new-found virtual stardom
to promote personal projects and to
further their careers. As a result of her
huge readership, Hamilton is now able
to make a living as a writer, contributing to the Web sites Queersighted,
SuicideGirls and OurChart. Stance has used her video venue to promote
emerging artists through her onlilne series Tune Time. Selwyn's success on
MySpace allowed her to ink a deal with MTV Networks; fans can now find
Lizzy-themed T-shirts, ringtones and e-cards, and she is currently planning a
Lizzy series for television or film.
When asked about the secret to turning their virtual soapboxes into
springboards for success, all three enthuse about the need to inspire one another, to receive instant feedback from fans and communicate back to them,
and so to create a sense of belonging to a global lesbian community.
"It also doesn't hurt to have clips of chicks making out on your page, any
chance you get;' adds Hamilton. "It's like lesbian honey to a lesbian bear:' ■

December 2007

I55

Nota BadSeed
MelissaDentonreflectson hercareerin
theater.ByLaurieK.Schenden
South Dakota doesn't exactly top the list of breeding grounds for actors or
hotbeds of theatrical training. Heck, it probably doesn't even make the list.
But Melissa Denton built a foundation there for an acting career on the
stage, in film and on television.
"My father was a theater professor at South Dakota State University, so I've
been around theater since birth;' she said after a recent performance as the notso-closeted lesbian Miss Fern in the Los Angeles stage production of Bad Seed.

"At"Girl

MiciaMoselytakesherone-woman
showonthe road.ByAzaniaBaker

Micia Mosely's hilarious Where My Girls At? is
coming to a state near you. Mosely, a San Francisco
Bay Area resident by way of Brooklyn, N.Y., is taking this one-woman act on the road and will be
touring the East Coast before setting her sights on
going international. Luckily, I had a chance to chat
with the sexy actor before she packed her bagsand took all of her five characters with her.
What was It like moving to the Bay Area?

I moved to the Bay in '95. I think moving to the Bay
from someplace else is what helped me really
be able to identify the characters because, you
know, when you move, you can really see things
that people who are native to the particular
place aren't able to see, because it feels normal
to them. And for me, I'm kind of like, you don't
find this strange? [Laughs.]
Can you talk about the concept behind the
show?

Oh, and South Dakota isn't exactly a hotbed for lesbians either.
While she remembers basking in the applause doing classic plays such as
Cat on a Hot Tin Roof as a 5-year-old, these days Denton may have found her
niche in parts that embrace the quirky, campy and unconventional instead.
Bad Seed,for instance, was a serious play and a cautionary film in the 1950s
before the Buzzworks Theater Co. of Minneapolis, of which Denton is a member, got a hold of it. The Buzzworks version begins with a character called the
Facilitator, who's basically a dexterous young man (or woman) who sits atop a
refrigerator and monitors the action for the audience.
Every time the dialogue strays from the original script, by Broadway playwright and Pulitzer Prize-winner Maxwell Anderson, the Facilitator tosses a
tissue to the floor. Even during a flurry of flying tissues in certain raucous and
raunchy scenes, it's a hoot to note how much of the original script, meant to
be a "chilling horror story of an 8-year-old murderess born without pity;' has
actually been left intact.
But what actor-director-producer Danny Schmitz recognized when he
staged a less conventional version of the play at the Lake Bowl in Minneapolis
in 1992 is that context is everything.
The Lake Bowl was a combination theater and bowling alley."When you
do shows there, you can hear the smash of the pins;' Denton says.
Schmitz-one of four gay and lesbian actors in the current Los Angeles
production of the play-dons a cutesy dress and pigtails for the role of the
8-year-old demon, and sets the play in surroundings opposite from what the
author intended. Suddenly, the words take on an entirely new, unintentionally
hilarious meaning.
Denton and a number of the cast
members and others in the closely knit
Minneapolis theater community caravanned to Los Angeles for the TV pilot
season in 1996, where they planned to

The premise is that there are auditions being held
Playa won and
for Black Beauty: Americas Next Top Negress,
I have to
admit, so far, Playa's won every time. And from
which is a reality television show where 10
black women live in a house together for 30
the feedback that we've gotten so far, people
days. And the show features four finalists who
have really enjoyed Playa. So some people in
Detroit or Chicago or New York, they'll recare vying for one spot in the house. And then
there's a fifthcharacter who's kind of the host. I
ognize Playa because they have a Playa of their
knew I wanted to do something where I would
own. They won't probably be as attached to her
be able to share four or five characters that I've
being from the Bay.
just come to know, living in the Bay Area.
Are the characters all facets of your personality, or did you pick them up from people
Did you purposefully make your characters
extreme in nature?
that you've met and associate with?
I've gone back and forth. I think the best way to
They are all facets of my personality and, for some
describe it was kind of an archetype. They are
characters, they're more rooted in other people.
definitely extreme, and they're extreme [so they
For example, Lady D is my mother. I was Ziggy
are] able to really get at their uniqueness. I try
when I moved here in '95. Then Playa-when
to tell you a little bit about their story and make
I go to a dub, Playa is everywhere. I tell people,
them a little bit more complex.
I don't have to make this up. All I have to do is
pay attention.
All the characters are great, but Playa sort
"Ar'Girlcontinued on page65
of won the audience over, right?

Spreadingthe D' LoWord
mount a bigger and broader production of Bad Seed.
"We thought it would be a great way to be seen and to get agents'
attention;' says Denton.
They had no idea that the play would become a hit. It won the LA
Weekly award for best comedy ensemble and became a critic's choice
in the Los AngelesTimes.

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With that kind of success,"Everybody stayed;' says Denton. Some
got jobs in TV-Mo
Collins spent five years on MadTV; Melissa
Peterman became a regular on Reba.Denton became the voice of Izzy,
the official mascot of the 1996 Olympics, and later added Seinfeldand
the lesbian film Sex Monster (with Mariel Hemingway) to her credits.
Nearly all of the actors continued to do theater and returned for
Bad Seed revivals five and now 12 years after the original Los Angeles
production. Recently, it was extended at the Lounge Theater, one of
many hip little theaters strung along Santa Monica Boulevard.
The move to Los Angeles also marked Denton's corning out as a
lesbian. She fell for the actress Dana Farner, the woman atop the fridge
in the original Los Angeles production. They've been together for 12
years and recently bought a home in Eagle Rock, outside Los Angeles,
where they live with their two cats.
Needless to say, Miss Fern's lesbianism in Bad Seed has become
more pronounced since then. She will forever see West Hollywood as
the place where she took that major step-being truthful, admitting
who she was. 'J\nd nothing fell apart!" she says, dramatically. The duo
went to city hall to register their domestic partnership, and "confetti
came flying out and the staff from city hall came out applauding:'
It was a defining moment.
Farner has since left her perch on the fridge to become Wolfgang
Puck's rock star sommelier, while Denton continues to work with
Buzzworks productions and also as a program manager with the
Unusual Suspects Theater Co., leading a theater camp for young pro,
bationers, under the auspices of the criminal justice system.
"When I first came to L.A., my focus was getting on TV. I devoted
a lot of energy to that. Then I got into education-using theater as a
way to transform youth:'
Unusual Suspects leads a sort of 12,week theatrical boot camp for
at,risk youth from volatile areas of Los Angeles.
"We write a show with them, then stage it at the end with all the
participants;' says Denton.
After the initial success of Bad Seed in Los Angeles, Buzzworks
produced a piece Denton wrote and directed, Cabin Pressure,at the
Hudson Theater. In between theater work she also performed onstage
at venues such as the Improv in New York City, the Comedy Store in
Los Angeles, and Catch a Rising Star in Boston.
She's now on the board at Buzzworks and looks forward to the
company's next production that she is directing in February 2008,
The Invasion of the Minnesota Normals by Jen Ellison. Based on the
Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory, a 1960s personality
test that, according to Denton, is still in use in mental health fields
today, it's in the same satiric vein as Bad Seed.
"It talks about the psychology of that day-is there a genetic con,
nection to the parents, is bad behavior in the genes?"
The idea, as with Bad Seed,is to twist a serious subject and skewer
pompous prognosticators, to the delight of audiences who love a good
laugh at the expense of the voice of authority. "We're not offending
them ... or we think we're not;' she says. ■

TheSri Lankancomediantalks abouther latest
show.ByTaniaHammidi
Say "D' Lo" to anyone in the know and the name
is sure to bring a smile. D' Lo, also known as the
D' Loco Kid, is a self,described "bald boyish
mofo" who transforms the everyday experiences
of being a butch Sri Lankan into stage comedy.
She uses music, art, storytelling and her hip,hop
and Bharatanatyam dance moves to archive and
honor all the struggles of LGBTs and the diversi,
ties of our lives. Hold on to your hats, ladies and
gentlemen. Here comes D' Lo.
How has your year been?

This year has been intense. I started off rehearsing
with Alison De La Cruz and Adelina Anthony
for our sketch,theater group, Spotlight
Stealerz. We premiered the show with a three,day run in the Bay Area. I was
also in a short film called Heart,ShapedAnus, where I play a militant lesbian.
One of the many highlights was receiving a National Performance Network
grant. I was able to workshop my solo show at a residency in Amherst (Mass.]
and then take the show to the National Asian American Theater Festival in
New York City.
What inspired you to take up a life in the theater?

[It's] where I get the chance to tackle the breadth of what I want to say and, more
importantly, how I want to say it.
Tell me about Ramble-Ations.
Born gay into a Hindu family and raised by hip,hop-gay, Hindu, hip,hop,
these three things make me up, but don't allow for each other. I flip from
being an immigrant mother, to a suburban princess giving a eulogy for her
friend who died in the tsunami, to a spiritual guide named White Eagle who
believes that spirits have a gender, to a reincarnated avatar of Gandhi who
wants to share his lessons with the world, to a butch kid who talks about her
love for her bois. These characters are all so different from one another and
are complex and filled with contradictions, but they all offer their stories with
a lot of love.
What journey do you take your audiences on?

To some South Asians or Sri Lankans, I might be the only gay person they are
close with. And the same goes with my gay folks-I'm the only Sri Lankan
they know. Through storytelling, getting close with folks, it is plain and
simple-we are so much more similar than we'd like to think. Sometimes
it's through intimate storytelling that we're finally able to drop our bags of
prejudice.
What is a favorite line from your work?

The true revolutionaries are the ones who are nicest.
Who does your work speak to?

My work speaks to all the communities I feel a part of, and therefore a respon,
sibility to-Sri Lankan, Sri Lankan American, South Asian, people of color,
gay folks, queers, transgendered, activists, artists, religious and spiritual.
What does the world need?

An understanding that everyone is walking with various degrees of hurt and
pain. Compassion in the way we talk. Patience in the way we listen. Upon
waking up, we should be in competition with ourselves to do as many good
deeds as we can. ■

December 2007

I57

TheBestof

~

•

By Colleen M. Lee

Lesbian"
Theater
As many of our readers know, each December CURVE puts together a list of the
best lesbian theater in the country. We decided to mix things up this time. This
year we shine the spotlight on the little gals. The small regional theaters you
probably haven't heard of, the aspiring high schooler working her way from
audition to audition, and the women who took initiative and founded their
own theater companies.

Renita Martin, Actor, Director and Playwright, Brooklyn, N.Y.
Being involved in lesbian theater for over 15 years hasn't always been easy, but
Renita Martin takes it in stride. "My challenge has been being a lesbian of
color and straddling all the communities I live in;' Martin says. She has written
and performed in countless productions, including this year's It Is the Seeing,
a retrospective of war that focuses on poor
people, people of color, women, gays and lesbians who have been engaged in quiet battles. Her most recent Blue Fire on the Water
touches on two women blues musicians who
are lovers, and explores Hurricane Katrina
as a metaphor for exposure. "What happens
when everything is swept away?" she asks.
Blue Fire will appear at both The Theatre
Offensive in Boston and Dixon Place in New
York City.

Teresa Mock, Actor, Producer and Writer, Minneapolis
Teresa Mock has done her share of producing and writing for the theater. She
did cabaret work to benefit Hurricane Katrina relief, and directed Body and
Sold, a play that focuses on victims of human traffic.king (all proceeds of the
play went to Breaking Free, an organization seeks to help victims of human
trafficking)."! believe that queer artists have a unique responsibility to themselves because it is so important for us to do our part in the fight for equality
by bringing ideas and being visible in the works of theater productions;' says
Mock. Her latest project is her autobiographical solo performance PieceStory,
which takes the audience on a journey through her
life."The performance focuses on [my] experiences,
some trying, some joyous;' says Mock. However,
she is putting her career on hold for the moment
and heading to London to work on a master of fine
arts degree through Naropa University, Boulder,
Colo., and the London International School for
Performing Arts.
Susan Jeremy, Stand-up Comic, Actor and Writer, Brooklyn, N.Y.
Susan Jeremy started her career cracking jokes as a stand-up comic for gay
and straight audiences, but has since made her way into theater to develop
her characters. Since then, she has co-written three plays: Was That My 15
Minutes?,P.S. 69 and Moving in Reverse.She has toured extensively for each

ss Icurve

during the past eight years. Her 10-year relationship with a Brazilian immigrant inspired a play
she is currently working on, Brazil Nut, about
cultural differences and the trials and tribulations
of immigration. For Jeremy the sexual preference
of her audience makes no difference. "If [a play)
moves the audience, it has achieved its purpose;'
she says.

Kelli Simpkins and Amy Matheny, Actors (and Partners),
Chicago
You might recognize Kelli Simpkins from the bit parts she had in major
Hollywood films like A Leagueof Their Own and ChasingAmy, but she's better known for her work in theater. She is the creator of and an original actor in
The LaramieProject,and also acted in I Think I Like Girls-she played two lesbians and a trans character. She is currently working on a new elay ( thanks to
a natir,nal grant) about lesbian actor Charlotte Cushman. At Chicago's famed
Steppenwolf Theater Company, Simpkens met her partner Amy Matheny,
also no stranger to the stage. Matheny has performed in over 35 playsbut
her claim to fame in Chicago's lesbian community is playing Gabrielle in both
productions of Xena Live: EpisodeOne and Xena Live: Episode2, The Musical.
Both Matheny and Simpkins appeared in the play ExecutionofJustice.
Sue Hamilton, Director and Producer, Los Angeles
Sue Hamilton began her career as an actor, but now directs and produces original and women's plays. Her earlier training makes her the perfect actor's director because it helped her understand what actors
go through on opening night and beyond. "I give
actors a long leash and empower them to create
a character that they can call their own;' she says.
She made her directorial debut with Eve Ensler's
FloatingRhoda & the GlueMan and from there she
went on to direct another 13 plays before becoming
the producing artistic director for the Los Angeles
Gay & Lesbian Center's Lily Tomlin Jane Wagner
Cultural Arts Center. ''As a director and concept
creator, knowing your audience is one of the most
important things to determine before you do anything;' she says. "Who will
want to see this? And how long can we expect that this project will inspire
people to support it?"
Rayne Puertos, Actor, Tampa, Fla.
"(I've been) bouncing from audition to audition since I could speak;' says 17-yearold actor Rayne Puertos. Puertos has been involved in plays such as The Vagina
Monologues,Cats, Into the Woods, Grease,The Tempestand Chicago-just to
name a few.She attended the Howard W. Blake Performing Arts High School
in Tampa, Fla., until she came out to her parents. "When I told my parents,

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they flipped out and yanked me out of school, calling me fragile and disillusioned;'
says Puertos. She has since returned to the school and is now active in all areas of
theater. Currently, she's working behind the scenes in a production of Too Much
Light Makes the Baby Go Blind.

Claire Avitabile, Director, Producer and Theater Owner, Minneapolis
Claire Avitabile and her life partner, Blythe Davis, started and are owners of the
20% Theatre Company Twin Cities located in Minneapolis. "We focus on raw, new
work, [and) the underrepresented females in professional
theatre;' says Avitabile. Last year they produced Piece Story
and also Carolyn Gage's TheSecond Coming ofJoan of Arc,
which includes a bold interpretation of Joan of Arc as a
lesbian. There are 20% Theatres in New York and another one in Chicago, which are run independently of each
other, and all the artistic directors are lesbians. "Our mission [is to) support female playwrights and artists;' Avitabile says proudly. The 20%
Theatre is now playing Gina Gionfriddo's After Ashley and Avitabile is directing
Standards of Care by transgender playwright Tobias K. Davis.

Tammy Shanley, Actor, Key West, Fla.
Tammy Shanley is passionate about theater. She has acted in The Tempest,
Macbeth and Emma. "I believe queer theater is just as important as any other work

chat deals with education, provoking new thought, laughter, offending, history;'
she says."I am a lesbian; however, I am an actor, too:' She studied in Akron, Ohio,
and recently relocated from Minneapolis co Key West, Fla. Before she moved,
Shanley was a part of Theatre Unbound, an organization dedicated co opening
opportunities for women actors, directors, playwrights and designers. She is currently working on a script.

Diana "Dayne" Voorheis, Actor and Writer, Long Beach, Calif.
Diana "Dayne" Voorheis has accomplished many things. But how many actors
can saythey'veplayed Alice from TheL Word on stage? Voorheis and her friend
entered a contest to perform a scene from TheL Word and won. And how did
she do~"[I] got a lot of sweet comments and warm attention after the performance,"she says. After several years away from live theater, she happily says today,
"Finally-I'm back on stage!" She has performed in productions including Steel
Magnolias
and Lettice and Lovage. What can she say? She's a multitasker. "I went
fromplaying a nun in Handy Dandy one night to a young Bronx punk in TheDay
theBronx Died the next;' she says. It was her best performance, she says, because
no one expected her to play a male role-something she prepared for by observing how street-smart men walk, dress and talk. She even wore male underwear.
"Dressing chis way made me feel that I was really a male youth, which helped me
reach deep into his character;' she says. •

Cl)

~
Q
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Maryanna Clarke, Theater Project Founder, Nashville, Tenn.
The mission of the Tennessee Women's Theater Project, says its founder Maryanna
Clarke, is to create opportunities for women in professional theater. "Women are underrepresented onstage, backstage and in theater management. While all roles are by
default for men, roles fur women have to be specificallywritten for them;' Clarke says.
The goal is to increase positive representation of women in theater through education
and equality practices. "We will never produce a show that has more roles for men
than it has for women;' she says. The project strives to bring professional women in
theater to the forefront and live theater to underserved audiences in Tennessee."We
create opportunities for women in professional theater;' Clarke adds. ■
Additional research by Lindsey]. Taylor.

LOCALPLAYHOUSESWE LOVE
1. The20%TheatreCompany,
lwin Cities,Minn.:Produces
new
andprogressive
workby female,transgender
andgender-queer
theatreartists,whilesupportingthe samegenderminoritiesartisticallybehindthe scenes.(twentypercent.org)
2. ActOutProductions,
Columbus,
Ohio:Promotes
gayand
lesbiantheaterandmulticulturaltheatricalservices.ActOuthasproducedmanyaward-winning
shows.In additionto performinglocally
in Ohio,theyalsotravelnationally.(members.aol.com/FabAct1)
3. DRAMA!,
NewOrleans:
Catersto theLGBT
community
andis committedto representing
thecommunity
throughits theaterandthearts
performances
in the BigEasy~ven afterKatrina.(dramano.org)
4. Jump-StartPerformance
Company,
SanAntonio,
Texas:Is
committedto the creationof art that is a lastingvoicefor diverse
communities.
uump-start.org)
5. NewConservatory
TheatreCenter,SanFrancisco:
Advances
the LGBTcommunityby usingtheaterto bringenlightenment
and
changeto youth,adultsandartists.(nctcsf.org)
6. OutProductions/Les
Productions
Out,Montreal:
A nonprofit
arts groupandregisteredcharitythat exploresandcelebrates
queer
culture,historyandidentity,theyproduceplaysin bothEnglishand
French.(out.ca)
7. OutwardSpiralTheatreCompany,
Minneapolis:
Champions
the queercommunitywith its dedicationto producingtheaterfroma
queerpointof view.(outwardspiral.org)
8. StageQ,Inc.,Madison,Wis.:Promoteslesbian,gayandother
queerpersonsin the arts by featuring"out" actors,artists,musicians,writersandperformers.(stageq.com)
9. TheatreAskew,NewYorkCity:Believesin a radicalnew
approachto the representation
of "queerness"as onethat encompassesa varietyof identities.(theatreaskew.com)
1O.TheaterOffensive,
Cambridge,
Mass.:Represents
the diverse
realitiesof queerlivesin art with the goalof buildinga progressive
community.(thetheateroffensive.org)
11. TheaterOut,Anaheim,Calif.:Presentsworkby lesbianandgay
playwrightsandproducesbothclassicandnewworkrelatedto gay
culture.(theatreout.com)
12. Threshold
Theatre,Belmont,Mass.:Thisnot-for-profitorganizationis dedicatedto the discoveryanddevelopment
of women
artistsfromthe past,presentandfuture.(thresholdtheatre.org)
13. TheatreRhinoceros,
SanFrancisco:
Theoldestqueertheater
in the UnitedStates,acclaimedRhinoturns30thisyear.(therhino.org)
14. TriangleProductions,
Portland,Ore.:Is a not-for-profitorganizationthat's in its 17thseasonof cateringto the LGBTQ
community
with award-winning
productions.
(tripro.org)
15. WhoWantsCake?Theatre,Ferndale,Mich.:Blursthe lines
betweenrace,income,religionandsexuality-this newtheateris
locatedin Detroit'sgayborhood.
(whowantscaketheatre.com)
16. WowcateTheatre,NewYork:Catersto all women.It beganas
a festivalbut madeits wayintoa permanent
spotandlesbiansloveit.
(wowcafe.org)
- LindseyJ. Taylor
December 2007

I 59

Reviews Sapphic Screen

Worlds for Two
Love is about shared perspective.

I By Candace Moore

TheGolden
Compass
(NewLine):Afterthis
month'sreleaseof
TheGoldenCompass,
the nationwill finally
believethata 12-yearoldgirl couldsavethe
world.In Compass,
whichhitstheaters
Dec.7, Lyra(playedby
DakotaBlueRichards)
setsoutto saveher
kidnapped
bestfriend,
butalongthejourney
discovers
she'sdestinedto savenotonly
herworld-in which
humanshaveanimal
alteregosandwitches,
bearsandGyptians
roam-but alsoours.
Theepic,whichalso
starsNicoleKidmanand
These new imports don't tell girl-meets-girl tales from the
DanielCraig,is based
outside looking in. They evocatively enter the inter-subjective
onthefirst novelof
the HisDarkMaterials spaces of lesbian romance.
booktrilogyby Philip
Spider Lilies (Wolfe): This visually lush Taiwanese lesbian
Pullman,
famousfor
love story vividly portrays the worlds of performance, internal
havingcriticizedC.S.
Lewisfor hismilandscape, online connection, artistry, memory and desire. Two
sogyny,racismand
women who fooled around as young neighbors meet again
sadomasochistic
relish years later in a tattoo parlor. Jade (Rainie Yang) is a chipper
for violence.
Weget
webcam girl in a green wig who confesses childhood secrets into seehowPullman's
stead of disrobing and plays with a doll rather than a G-string.
series-considered
a
Plus, her grandmother keeps stumbling in front of the digital
directrebuttalto Lewis'
camera. While her goofy show is not attracting one-on-one
propagandist
workcustomers, the stammering cop (Jian-hung Shen) who's supposed
playsin Peoria.
And,to
to bust her is enamored. In search of a sexy tattoo to drum up
watcha 12-year-old
business, Jade ends up face-to-face with her first love Takeko
provegirlsgotgame.
(goldencompassmovie.(Isabella Leong) behind the needle. Trying to unlock stonecom)- MeaChavez
faced Takeko's acknowledgment of their adolescent romance,
Jade commissions her to ink a design of"love" onto her body,
only to find that Takeko's tattoos aren't decorative, they're talismans that cause real and surreal things to happen. The winner
of the Berlin Film Festival's Teddy Award, Zero Chou's second
feature imaginatively captures how experiencing others and

60

Icurve

fantasizing about ourselves sometimes leads to missed connections, and occasionally to beautiful overlaps. (wolfevideo.com)

Love Sick (Cinequest): In Romanian, the title of this
film (and the novel it's adapted from) means "sickly relationships;' and it is to director Tudor Giurgiu and novelist Cecilia
Stefaneschu's great discredit that the love between two
Bucharest college girls is equated with incest between brother
and sister. That said, the film version of the relationship between Alex (Joana Barbu), a book-smart country mouse, and
Kiki (Maria Popistasu), the jaded party girl who becomes her
confidante, best friend and lover, is portrayed as anything but
sick. The camera dotes on the deepening bond between the two
girls during the year Alex boards upstairs from Kiki's family
home, and the lovers are depicted as two people who fall in love
by meeting each other halfway-physically, mentally and emotionally. Kiki's abusive relationship with her brother Sandu, on
the other hand, wreaks havoc wherever it touches down. But
troubling parallels aren't the only problem here; scenes in real
time that have scarcely been cut or edited cause this picture,
with its hyper-dramatic incest subplot and overwrought narrative, to drag. While she doesn't singlehandedly save the show,
Worldsfor Two continuedon page62

DVD PICKS
authorof international
bestsellerRebecca,
andit shows
the writeras a gorgeous,
somewhatawkwardupperclassBritwhois marriedwith
children,buthas"the heartof a
boy,"andwhobecomesutterly
infatuatedwiththe glamorous
wife of herAmericanpublisher.Butthenthereis alsothe
olderwomanin Daphne'slife,
GertrudeLawrence,
the actor,
whohasthe auraof a witty,
Thethree
TwoWeeks(MGM):A portrayal seductivepanther.
of foursiblingsfacingthe death womencirclearoundeach
of theirmother,in whichhumor otherfor yearswith Daphne
at the center,andthe ultimate
heals,angerexacerbates
and
directionof theirmutualdestiny
lovehelpsthisfamilyfacethe
remainsa mysteryuntilthe end
inevitable.
SallyFieldplays
of thefilm. (logoonline.com)
Anita,the motherof three
- UrsulaSteck
grownsonsanda daughter.
Aftertryingeverythingelse,
Anitafacesherlastweeksof
life in hospicecareat the home
sheshareswith hersecond
husband.Herdutifuldaughter
Emilyhasbeencaringfor her.
Anita'ssonsarrivefromtheir
busylivesunsureof whatto
expect.Keith,the oldestanda
filmmaker,shootsan interview
with his motherin whichshe
appearspolished,bright-eyed
andmostlyhappy.Clipsof this
footageareshownthroughout Dorm(TartanU.S.A.):Inthis
crazy,Asianhorror
the movie.Theinterviewoffers supremely
flick, 12-year-old
Chatreeis
viewersthe arcof Anita'slife
transferred
to anall-boyboardas shegoesfromchildhood
to
ingschoolwheretheteachparenthood,
fromfightingcaners
don'tcareandthe other
certo finallyfacingdeath.The
boysbullyhimwith storiesof
siblingsjoketo easetheirpain
hanginggirlsanddeadboys.
andAnitais just as involvedin
the laughterastheyare.Bonus Finallyhe makesa friend,only
to discoverthatVichienhas
points:HeroesCleaDuVall
a darksecretof hisownand
co-stars.(mgm.com)
- Mea
thenthe creepyallusionsto
Chavez
sexualrepression
seemclear.
Daphne(Logo):If you'rein the (Tartanfilmsusa.com)-Diane
Anderson-Minshall
moodto completely
immerse
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TheUnderworld
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Trout:Vol.1 Discovery
&
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diveintothe melancholy
of
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lovestoriesof post- Entertainment):
friendwith a loveof hydrology
WorldWarII Europe,
thenthisis
(orfreshwaterfishing)?Thisis
themoviefor you.Thebeautithe gift for her.Thisacclaimed
fullyshotfilm is inspiredbythe
seriesgoesinsidestreamslettersof Daphne
duMaurier,
MIU

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cu;,.

N!I..DOtAl'UNCA.VA.l,fAQtNICHJUONa::MUTOHDU'IAU.

alivewithtrout,insects,
crawfishandmore-and offers
upWendell"Ozzie"Ozefovich's
PBS-style
narrationonwhat
goeson in that murkyH2O.
Focusing
onthe secretsof wild
andhatcherytrout,Underworld
givesthoseaquaticbeasts
thesamelovingattentionthat
othersheaponwhalesand
tropicalstunnerswithoutthe
usualcannedaquariumshots.
(lifesizeentertainmentcom)
- SusanHernandez

LouisC.K.:Shameless
(HBO):
Whatdoesthisstraightwhite
dudehaveto offerqueers?A
hilariouspro-gayandsometimeshomoerotic
stand-up
specialwitha charactersimilar
to C.K.'sownlesbo-friendly
HBOseries,LuckyLouis.His
riffson EwanMcGregor
and
gaymarriageareworththe
rental.Hisfirst HBOcomedy
half-hourspecialis a bonus.
(HBO.com)
- DAM
LuellaMiller(LifeSize
Entertainment):
DianeGiraud's
taut psychological
thrillerhas
shadesof Polanski.
When
3O-something
Lydiatakesin
seductiveLuellaafterfinding
herhiding,she'sin for more
thanshebargained
for.As
Luellaunleashes
hersexual
power,it disruptsLydiaandthe
restoftheirsmallNewZealand
town.Theshocking
endwill
leaveyoudebating
for.days.
(Lifesizeentertainmentcom)
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connecting lesbians
December 2007

I61

Q+A

Mia Michaels
Worlds for Two continued from page 60

Mia Michaels started taking dance classes at
the age of three and began choreographing at
11. In addition to being one of the most popular
choreographers on Fox's hit show So You Think
You Can Dance, she is also the founder of a
New York-based dance company called RAW.
Michaels talks with CURVE about her amazing choreography, a possible guest spot on The
L Word, and the artist she'd love to work with
most. - Lyndsey D:4.rcangelo

How does it feel to be in the spotlight?
You know, I don't think much about it because
I'm kind of an internal person. It's a little
strange when I go out and people are like,
"Ahhhh!" because I don't understand it. I'm
just doing what I love to do.

The dance you choreographed for So You
Think You Can Dance about meeting your
father in heaven was very powerful and
incredibly personal.
It was personal. When we were in rehearsal, I couldn't ... to this day I can't even get into it about my
dad because it's such a touchy thing for me and so emotional. We had an amazing relationship,
so when I was in rehearsal I couldn't even talk about it. I would write notes to the dancers about
what I wanted them to do because I didn't want to be that vulnerable on camera.

Was it hard to put so much of yourself out there?
I wasn't really thinking about it. I was just thinking about the idea of meeting my dad in heaven and
how cool it would be. My dad was a smoker and died of lung cancer. I had been a smoker since
I was 14. The day of rehearsal I had just come in from having a smoke and it hit me ... why am
I creating a dance about meeting my dad in heaven? It freaked me out because I was thinking, I
don't want to meet him right now. I want to live my life. I quit smoking that day.

Tell me a little bit about Reality at Work, aka RAW, and what it means.
RAW was a dance company I created in New York. ft lasted for two years. It was at a time when I really found myself and understood my movement. The response was amazing, and it kind of put
my name on the map. That's when everything started happening commercially, and one thing led
to another, so I had to let the company go. RAW is about me not conforming to commercialism.
I stay true to what my vision and instincts are. I am very proud of chat.

You've worked with Madonna and Prince; who else would you like to work with?
I'd love to work with Bjork. I love artists who aren't afraid to be different and be who they are.

How about other projects? Would you be open to a guest spot on The L Word?
Yes. [Laughs.]

With such a lesbian following, there's been some speculation about your sexuality.
Well, I've always been with men. But I am also a very free spirit and I believe that who we fall for
is more about the human spirit and not sexuality. I've been with men because that's who I have
connected to at this point in my life. But who's to say? I have no idea what tomorrow will bring
or who I'm going to meet. That's just how I look at it.

What's up next for Mia?
I'm creating a clothing line called RAW. It should be in stores by spring or summer of 2008. It's
unisex lifestyle-wear made from natural fabrics like hemps and cottons. It's amazing, really raw.
It's like Jesus meets Lenny Kravitz. I have a couple of stage projects floating around. I love doing
stage. Ocher than that, I'm going to just be Mia for a while. ■

62

Icurve

Popistasu is irresistibly watchable, and renders
her character skillfully. (cinequestonline.org)

Looking
for
Cheyenne
(Regent
Releasing): This off-the-map, zany French
drama about a high school science teacher's reunion with her ex-girlfriend on the outskirts of
capitalistic society explores alternatives to "the
system" that might sustain life, love and the longing to be social. Director Valerie Minetto's poetic
and theoretical-if
abstract-film
offers philosophical and radical notions to those who are
hungry for dissension. But it proceeds too intellectually at times and its use of magical realism
feels stretched. While we buy Cheyenne's (Mila
Dekker) telepathic visits to Sonia (Aurelia Petit)
and understand chat their love suffers the taint of
the real, the film takes a too-theatrical turn when
Sonia's past lovers materialize and offer dueling
monologues while she's in bed with someone new.
It's hard to distinguish what's really happening
from what Sonia is working through internally,
aided by fantasy, though this is equally the pleasure of the film. Sonia's journey to the caravan
where Cheyenne lives among exiles leaves her
sure that living by candlelight and skinning rabbits for dinner doesn't solve anything, but on her
return to Paris, she doubts the widespread need
for Prozac, too. Cheyenne sees Sonia's struggle
with leaving material things as a lack of creativity: "To live together;' she says, "you need lots of
imagination:' This film is certainly not lacking in
that department; it's as much an allegorical love
story as a manifesto, suggesting that we can still
find sustenance in the realities we construct with
others. (regentreleasing.com) ■

In the Stacks

Reviews

Looking Both Ways
It's all about sex, except when it isn't. IBy Rachel Pepper
From the touchy topic of women's bisexuality to that of female
masturbation, weve got dibs on the dirt you need to be happily
buzzed, or bi, this issue.

Look Both Ways, Jennifer Baumgardner (Farrar,
Straus and Giroux): At the conclusion of Baumgardner's
latest book on bisexuality, Look Both Ways: Bisexual Politics,
one is left unsure of the exact message she's trying to convey.
Is it that feminism causes
female bisexuality? That
we re all bisexual, really?
That college plus the
music of Ani DiFranco
make bisexuality a natural choice for young
women? And is this book
really about politics?
Well, not really. But no
matter. Look Both Ways
is still an engaging read,
exploring the many layers of female bisexuality
(the book doesn't touch
on male sexuality much,
which isn't clarified in

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the title) for a generation
influenced by feminism,
lesbian activism on campus and yes, great music.
Baumgardner, who was
an intern at Ms. magazine
in the early '90s, wrote
several books on young
women and feminism,
such as Manifesta: Young
Women, Feminism, and
the Future and Grassroots:
A Field Guide for Feminist Activism. She dated Amy Ray of the
Indigo Girls and, after they broke up, got pregnant by a male
partner. Shes a lively writer, and the book is a personal, fun
introduction to what bisexuality means to younger women, as
well as the problems inherent in an often misunderstood identity. Indeed, bisexuality is a tricky identity to inhabit, especially
in the lesbian world, where bisexual women are often seen as
psychosexually incomplete, as competitors or even as traitors.
Even the word itself is problematic. "The word bisexual makes
me cringe at times, but saying I'm heterosexual or a lesbian feels
inaccurate, regardless of who I am in a relationship with. [T]he
label bi sounds bad because, at least in some ways, bisexuals are an unliberated, invisible and disparaged social group;'

Baumgardner writes. Still, bisexual women must be seen as having their own identity, she suggests, not as part-time lesbians,
since "bisexual women don't know what it's like to be lesbian, if
there are even universal elements oflesbian experience:' So how
do we find common ground with our bisexual sisters, whom the
author calls the "conduits for the cultural conversation America
is having about gay rights?" Baumgardner doesn't seem to know,
other than simply telling everyone to keep looking both ways.
But hey, at least the view is good.

Getting Off, Jamye Waxman (Seal Press): Former
Babeland employee and sex writer Jamye Waxman sheds light
on one of the most taboo topics around: female masturbation.
From definitions of what an orgasm is-and how to have oneto a rundown on current models of vibrators (sure, you've heard
of the Hitachi Magic Wand, but what about the Lelo or the
Cone?) to celebrity confessions,
this book has
the right buzz
on the topic. Yes,
there are other
books on the
subject out there,
but Waxman is
both
seriously
informed
and
sweetly
informal,
lending
A WOMAN'S
GUIDf
TO MASTUOATION
this text a sense of history
(who knew the Greeks were
known for making dildos, or
that the motivation behind
Kellogg brand cereals was
to prevent kids from masturbating by serving them a
cold breakfast?) and science
( the U-spot orgasm is a new
one
to me). Waxman is at
J•mye W•xm•n
her best when she's acting
the sex saleswoman, like in
the "Self Love and Sex Toys Too" chapter, when describing the
varieties of dildos one can buy, like "curvy, straight, or bumpy;'
"vibrating or static;' "butt stuff" and even phthalate-free, an
important consideration if you don't want toxic chemicals in
your privates. There are, however, a few topics Waxman skimps
on. For example, on the topic of multiple orgasms she fails
to provide an accurate description. Still, for any woman who
wants to know how to masturbate or expand her repertoire
(should she already be experienced), this book will be a most
pleasurable read. ■

Getting Off

EDITOR'S
PICK
WordWarriors,
Ed.
AlixOlson(Seal
Press):
Prize-winningpoetAlixOlson
hasputtogetheran
amazingcollectionof
workby35 of today's
mostprominent
female
spoken-word
poets.
Theessaysbythe
contributors
abouta
particularmomentin
theirlivesareespecially
interesting
because
theygivea greatinsight
intotheworkof these
women.Mostof the
womenfromSisterSpit
_make
appearances
here,including
the
poetrygroup'sfounder,
Michelle
Tea.Thebook
alsoincludespieces
by EileenMylesand
PatriciaSmith.Some
of themoreinteresting
contributors:
NatalieE.
Ilium,a poetbornwith
cerebralpalsywhose
poetryhelpedherfind
hervoice,andAyaDe
Leon,whosepoem
"Cellulite"encourages
womento "go 'head"
andjiggle.Thepoems
areencouraging
and
inspiring;definitely
a must-read
for any
spoken-word
fan.
- KatiePeoples

December 2007

I63

Q+A

Smarty-Pants

Hilary Goldberg

Our roundup of the year's most
thought-provoking academic rags.

Whether she is bouncing onto the set
of her latest film production or sinking
into the red vinyl booth of her favor~
ire writing spot, director, writer and
poet Hilary Goldberg has a knack for
telling lesbian stories. Her currently
touring film, In the Spotlight,brings
starlets Guinevere Turner, Michelle
Tea and Clint Catalyst into a metafic~
tional tale of finding one's own voice
(hilarygoldberg.com). Logo picked up
her work in 2007, and she received the
Filmmaker's Development Grant from
POWER UP this year. We caught up
with Goldberg on tour with Giraffe
MedicineBook,her recently published
book based on her 2003 poetry al~
bum. - Tania Hammidi

You are a talented lesbian and genderqueer storyteller. What
inspires you?
My art begins and ends in my heart. On remarkable occasions, I am moved
outside of myself, like a Cubist painting, and then I have to negotiate ev~
ery aspect of it. My compulsion to share this through art is unavoidable.
Your work is smart and so funny.
"Hilary" is derived from hilarious, and I think my parents knew that they
were going to need a sense of humor to deal with me, and that I would
need one too.
I dropped acid at 14, sat at the bottom of a swimming pool in Miami, Fla.,
and asked myself why I shouldn't just stay down there. The answer came
back that I'm here to make people laugh, so I suppose it is part of the
bargain for my continued existence.
Tell me about the poem "Zero Point" from Giraffe Medicine Book.
Zero point is the lowest energy-like a vacuum state or empty space. I had
a particularly hard time after the ending of a significant relationship that
defined my early 20s and walked around like my pilot light was out. I
seemed to attract lots of people into my life that were at one time combus~
tible but were also burnt out.
When I chose to return to waking life, I tried to bring my friends with me, but
it doesn't work that way, as everyone is on their own journey outside of the
collective one. So for mysel£ I walked darkness home.
Penny Arcade introduces the book. Cool.
Penny Arcade is the first artist to put how she feels about my work in writ~
ing, and I'm incredibly appreciative of that. We joke about how I was just
beyond the veil, chomping at the bit to incarnate and join all of the radical
movements in the late '70s, but then I got here and I didn't know how to
speak yet, or walk, let alone march.
What message does your work give to lesbians?
Be unapologetic, never lose your voice and carve out the world you want to
live in. ■

Bridges:JewishFeminist
Journal:
Withessays,
fiction,poetry,art
andreviewsontopicsof interestto activists,
Jews,feminists
and
queers-including
celebrated
translations
of Latino,Spanish
and
Yiddish
lit-this biannual
journalis oneof themostdiverseofferings
available
in women'sstudies.Recent
piecesincludeMaskitBendel's
penetrating
reportonbreastcanceramongPalestinian
womenand
TerriSchiavo
Inc.,a performance
piecebyJylLynnFelman.
(bridgesjoumal.org)
Hypatia:AJournal
of Feminist
Philosophy:
Named
fortheancientEgyptian
woman
philosopher,thequarterly
Hypatia
hasbecome
anindispensable
source
for newworkonphilosophyandwomen's
studiessinceit began in
1986.Alltheusualdal11ngs
of lesbian
feminist
philosophy,
likeClaudia
GardandAlisonJaggar,
arehere,joinedbynewcomers
writingabout
homophobia
andpower,Sept11 andevenThe
L Word.
Academics
tacklingTheL Word.How
canyouresist?(msu.edul~hypatia)

TheJournal
ofFeminist
studiesIn
lllllglon: StraightouttaGambridge,
the
biannual
JFSRisthenation'soldest
Interdisciplinary,
interreligious
feminist
academic
journalin religious
studies.
Recentdispatches
includeHollyJoan
Toensing's
"Women
of Sodom
and
Gomorrah:
Collateral
Damage
in theWar
AgainstHomosexuality?"
anda debate
onAfricanAmerican
womanism.
The
joumafalsosponsors
a NewScholar
Awardforemerging
offeministand religiousschool&-note
thatyoudon'tneed1Dhaveanadvancedacademic
degreeto apply.
(hds.harvard.eduljfsrJ
..-.c11111· Fllllilllllft,Rw, 1'rlnlnlttonallam:
Hostedbythegals
at SmithCollege,
MBridianB
is a biannual
journalthatoffersexciting
newapproaches1D,ct10larlY
and creative
workbyand aboutwomen
of color.WhileHelenaGrlce'spiece lastyearontransracial
adoption
doesnotfocusonsame-sex
U.S.couples,
her overview
of adoption
narratives
shouldberequired
readingforanyone
consideringadoptingfromabroad.(smlth.Bdulmerldians)

SocialTextThisdaringcultural-studies
quarter1y
madewaves
lastfaUwithi1sspecial iUuesubtitledWhat'sQuser
AboutfJutJtJt'
Studies
Now?Co-editedbyDavid
L Eng(editorof OueBr
InAsian
America),thealwayscompelngJudith
Halberstam
(Oude,
Whn's MyGend8f?
orIs There
LifeonUtanus?J
andJose
Esteban
Munoz
(OlsidtJnllt'ica:
Queers
of ColorandthePerformance
of
Politics,.
(socialtext.duks}Ountals.org)
- JuliaBloch

C,

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(!)

fr
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64

I curve

PAGE TURNERS
DianeKeaton'srabble-rouser
characterfrom Sleeper.Each
namealsohasanorigin,source
andquotesoyoucanbrushup
onyourgeektriviawhiledecidingwhatto callyourbundleof
joy.(quirkbooks.com)
- Jenna
Loceff

Iridescence,
ed.Joliedu Pre
(AlysonBooks):Thechallenge
is findinganeroticaanthology
that is differentfromthe rest,
with storiesthat donotall have
familiarthemes.Iridescence
breaksthat pattern,providingus
witha culturallydiverseandvery
sensualcollection.It embraces
anassortment
of storytypesand
styles,recognizing
that eroticais
veryindividualandpersonalto
the reader.Includedin this 23storyanthology
aresomewellknownauthorslikeFionaZedde,
aswell as lesser-known
authors
likeWinnieJerome.Thecommon
threadis thatall arewell-written,
andtheyareactuallystories,not
just scenes.It is a collectionthat
trulycapturesthe rainbowthat
ourflag represents.
(alyson.com)
- Kathilsserman

AnnetteVallon,
JamesTipton
(HarperCollins
Publishers):
A fictionalstorybasedon real
characters,
JamesTiptonrecreatesAnnetteVallon'slife in one
of thosefictionalbiographies
that areso popularrightnow.In
hisstory,Vallon,the mistressof
EnglishpoetWilliamWordsworth,
is a smart,braveandwillful
heroine,whousesall herskills
to survivethe FrenchRevolution
andkeepherdaughtersafe.
Nodirectlesbianinterest,but
certainlya greatladyherokind
of story.(harpercol/ins.com)
- MariaGinsbourg

accidental
first meetingwith
JuliaValiant,whomsheinstantly
fallsfor.Butfiguringouthowto
actuponthosefeelingswhileshe
is in hidingposesa seemingly
insurmountable
problem-a
problemthat,asthe readersoon
learns,is the leastof Rhianna's
concerns.
DarkValentine
vividly
illustrateshowbeingstalked
canroba womanof everything,
forcingthevictimto livein
constantfearof beingdiscovered.Thenovelis a quickread,
butthe messages
that Fulton
impartsleavetheirimpression
longafterthe bookis putdown.
(boldstrokesbooks.com)
- Kl

"At"Girl continued from page 56

Are you interested in pursuing acting in a
more commercial field?
I definitely am. I know people who are in the business. I've seen my share of all the movies and
TV shows about the pitfalls of the business.
But I'm not 17, with all my hopes and dreams
riding on whether I get that commercial. I
want to definitely move into more commercial
acting, but there's a certain way that's important for me to do it. I'm not going to sell stuff
that I don't believe in, or find myself in some
crazy movie just because somebody says it's a
great opportunity.
Did you gear the show toward a particular
audience?

Not really. I kind of was hoping some black brethren would come, check it out, make sure I got
it right. To the extent that I've thought about
audiences, it was always like, the biggest issue
was how much Oakland slang to put in, knowing that we want to go on the road. Would the
joke translate if I'm saying, "You feel me, hella
hyphy;' you know? So I'm like, I can't believe
I'm depending on the hyphy movement to go
national. [Laughs.]
What are your future plans for the show?
We want to take the show international. Mexico,
Canada, [particularly] Toronto. Again, really
trying to get people-because we feel like a
lot of these characters, while they are rooted in

HonorUnderSiege,Radclyffe
(BoldStrokesBooks):
This
sixthbookin the Honorseries
is unpredictable
andexplosive,
the Bay, these characters are pretty typical of
makingit the mostcomplex
black lesbians in the United States and I think
andcompelling
in the series.
right now were trying to get the national tour
CamandBlair'sstoryremains
kicked
off, so that we can see how people are
in theforefront,butwe alsoget
relating. And part of the beauty of the show
to knowCIAagentValerieRoss
is the question-and-answer period. For me, it's
betterandseeherinnerturmoil
with herlife,herjudgments
my favorite part.
and
her
past.
The
book
takes
The
question-and-answer period of the
<i.·.·,,-;--~
placein a verysmallwindow
show is real?
of time,similarto whatwe see
A lot of people think that they are [planted]. I'm
in JDRobb'sDeathbooksand
curious as to what are some of the questions
in theTVshow24. It occursin
people are going to ask. We really want to go
oneweek'stime,makingthe
Sci-FiBabyNames,Robert
to Atlanta because we think that would be a
actionfeellikereal-timeevents,
Schnakenberg
(QuirkBooks):
great
place for the show and, you know, people
andthecharacterdevelopment
Calfingall soon-to-bemommies!
are
closeted
in the South. I mean, there is a
concentrated.
HonorUnderSiege
If yougetonanelevatorand
thriving
black
lesbian community there but I
DarkValentine,
JenniferFulton usesthe eventssurrounding
think,"Beammeup,Scotty,"or
(BoldStrokes):
Thissolid,
don't know that they would talk to each other,
Sept.11,whichthe authorhas
dreamof frequenting
the barin
believable
anderoticromance
integrated
withsensitivityand
at least during the day. And that was my expeStarWars,Sci-FiBabyNames
addresses
a troublingsocialismaturity.Asanaddedbonus,
rience when I was there in the early 2000s just
is the bookfor you.Choose
suethat is largelyignoredbythe thereaderis alwaystreatedto a
really wanting to see more people come to the
from500nameslikeTrillian,
mainstream:
stalking.Themain
romance
withineveryRadclyffe
show who aren't black lesbians. And at both
ArthurDent'sloveinterestin The
character,
Rhianna
Lamb,buries tale. (boldstrokesbooks.com)
Hitchhikers
Guideto theGalaxy;
shows this past weekend, we certainly had our
heridentityandlivesunderthe
-Kl
Lara,the womanwhogavebirth
fair amount of black lesbians and we certainly
radarto escapeherstalker.
to Superman;
lnara,the beautiful
had a lot of people who didn't fit into either of
Duringthistime,shehasan
courtesan
fromFirefly;andLuna,
those categories. ■

~~~y NAMES

,,,,·,~:6)

December 2007

I65

Reviews Music Watch

Best Bets for Holiday Gifts
I

Spread the joy of these albums this year. By Margaret Coble
anism in the press, TheCon
is full of references to their
private lives and relationships with women, from
the gay marriage piano
prelude "I Was Married" to

EDITOR'S
PICK
BetterThanBlood,
MeganMcCauley
(Fly-LifeInc.):The
newalbumfromthis
Ohionativeis whatAvril
Lavignewouldsound
likeif shewasn't,you
know,fakingpunk.
McCauley's
albumis
an impressive
foray
intopop-rock.
This19year-oldchannels
the
independent
spiritof
herheroandinfluence,
JanisJoplin.Andunlike
somewannaberockers
outthere,McCauley
actuallywritesherown
songs.Theragebehind
"I'll PayYouto Shoot
Him"is inspiredbya
domesticfightbetween
herparents.(McCauley
actuallytolda copshe'd
payhimto shoother
fatherwhentheywere Just in time for your holiday gift-shopping frenzy, here are a few
calledto thescene.) sure-to-be-requested CDs that I somehow overlooked when
Thepartytune"Tap they were released earlier this year. Horse McDonald, Tegan and
That"is reminiscent
of Sara, and Laura Love are all longtime lesbian favorites, and their
Pinkandthe Donnas. latest albums do not disappoint. In fact, I'd say they are some of
Definitely
analbumthat the best albums of the ye~r.
shouldn'tbe missed.
(meganmccauley.com)
The Con, Tegan and Sara (Vapor/Sire): After the
- KatiePeoples huge success of 2004's So Jealous and 18 months of consecutive touring, Canadian out-queer twins Tegan and Sara needed
a break-from the rock-star life and from each other. So they
took their time, working up demos over the course of the next
year, and eventually teamed up with Death Cab for Curie's Chris
Walla in his Portland, Ore., studio to record this, their fifth album. The 14-track set is full of dark, introspective indie rock
songs with new wave-ish electronic flourishes, most notably
on the minimalist ';\re You Ten Years Ago?;' a Joy Division-ish
rumination on the end of a relationship. "Back in Your Head"
goes a perkier, bouncier route, musically, but lyrically still mines
anxious emotional territory regarding intimacy with a lover. The
title track is a more straight-on rocker about relationship drama,
while the teen-angst "Like 0, Like H" is an odd little tune, vacillating
between sweet melancholia and tortured outburst.
Considering that this duo doesn't much like to tout their lesbi-

66

I

curve

the hushed heartbreak of
"Call It Off" that ends the
disc. All in all, The Con is
expertly produced and flows
effortlessly from beginning
to end; it will no doubt put
the dyke twins back in the
hipster-rock spotlight again.

(teganandsara.com)

Red Haired Girl, Horse
(Kosmic): With her distinctive voice, often compared to that of Alison Moyet
and Joan Armatrading, out
Scottish singer-songwriter
Horse McDonald has been
something of a cult figure
in the States. Lesbianand women's-music fans
swooned over her 1990 album The Same Sky, particularly the
poignant "Careful;' which later gained worldwide dance club
notoriety via remixes by Sasha and Brothers In Rhythm. But
after 1993's God'sHome Movie, not much has been heard from
the singer here in the U.S. In Europe, however, she's had a
higher profile, with seven albums and eight singles released over
the past three decades. Now she's getting some well-deserved
American love via her new independent U.S. release, Red Haired
Girl,a passionate 10-track set of jazzy acoustic pop and soulful
torch songs, all remixed from her U.K. album of the same name,
which was released last year. The result is a much more cohesive
album where every song "pops:• From the upbeat opener "This
Time'' to the melancholy "Same Old, Same Old;' it's not just
Horse's emotive voice that draws you in. She can craft a flawless
pop song, too. The mesmerizing "Make Love to Me" is
-~-----·,=-•

a personal favorite, with its
combination of muted horns
and a haunting drum beat,
while the soaring"Catch My
Fall" is purportedly Horse's
own favorite from the set
and likely her first radio
single. (randan.org)

Q+A
Striptease Battleshiip
NeGrass,
Laura
Love
(Octaroon
Biography): This amazing 12,cut collection
from the quirky, queer African American funk
bassist is a concept album and period piece that
succeeds in mingling traditional bluegrass and
Negro spirituals with Love's unique storytelling
ability and musical prowess. In the liner notes,
Love explains that, like many African Americans,
she can't trace her family via official documents
beyond her grandparents, due to slavery. And so,
on this album, she offers an imagined history of
her great,grandparents' lives, starting at the end
of the Civil War, as they were freed from slav,
ery. From traditional banjo,and,fiddle bluegrass
numbers like 'John Hardy" and "Shady Grove;'
to original compositions like the album opener
"Saskatchewan (Juneteenth):' which imagines her
great,grandmother's migration from Galveston,
Texas, after receiving word of the Emancipation
Proclamation, each song sets the scene as the lis,
tener delves deeper and deeper into the emotional
lives of Love's family."Passin;' another original, is a
love story between Love's mother and father, based
around the issue of light,skin privilege and dark,
skin discrimination within the African American

Mix the sounds of the Ramones, Bikini Kill and the Breeders, then add the thought process of
the advocacy group Guerrilla Girls, and you have Striptease Battleshiip. The band includes Jena
Lacomis Garcia as vocalist, Giselle Basnuevo on drums, Didi Valencia on guitar and Omar Garcia
on bass. Together, they rock out and have a unique sound and a familial style, but who is Striptease
Batdeshiip, really:>- Lindsey]. Taylor
How long has Striptease Battleshiip been together?

Jena:I met Omar first, and we had a lot in common. He was one of the only guys who responded
well to me and wasn't like, you can't do the music thing because you're a girl. After that, he in,
traduced me to Didi and Giselle, who were both involved in other bands, and it only seemed
natural to acquire their talents and start a band.
Why the name Striptease Battleshiip?
Jena:I came up with the name with some friends of mine. We talked about how the music scene

was dominated by boys and decided to start a revolution, and after some word play we came up
with Striptease Batdeshiip because it alludes to sexuality and power, and we felt like this name
was representative of a return of that balance.
Who inspires the music of Striptease?
Basnuevo:
Bad breakups! Bikini Kill, the Police, hip,hop and anything with a heavy drum beat.
Omar:The Breeders and the Ramones.
Valencia:
That Dog, the Misfits, Mika Miko and Heavens to Betsy.
What would be your dream performance?
Basnuevo:
Travis Barker is my idol.
Jena:The Gossip and/ or Kathleen Hanna.
Valencia:
Traveling festivals all over the world would be amazing.
Omar:Madison Square Garden with the Breeders.
What do you do when you're not rocking out?
Jena:I like photography and writing.
Basnuevo:
I love drums and the ladies, which is not a bad combo!
Valencia:
I work with makeup and clothes whenever I get the chance.

Omar:If I'm not in the studio recording, then I am designing something. I am a graphic designer.
Do you have any plans to drop a CD soon?

Basnuevo:
We always have that plan ... hopefully, in a couple of months, we can make (it] happen. ■

community, while "Load Up'' is a Love,concocted
field holler like the ones slaves sang while working.
Originals like 'i\ngry Days" and "Can't Understand"
don't have any specifichistorical referencesbut none,
theless fit in with the spiritual tone of the disc, along
with the album,closing gospel throwdown "He Is
My Rock:' Truly a masterpiece from one of the
most authentic singer,songwriters in the biz today.
(lauralove.net)■

OTHER LICKS

Out of This World
The Planet podcast dishes on all things
L Word and lesbians are loving it.

BetweenDaylight
AndDark,
MaryGauthier
(LostHighway):
TheopenlylesbianLouisiana
native
offersup herfifth setof sublime
down-and-out
folk bluesandcountry noir,epitomized
bythe poignant
Hurricane
Katrinaode"Can'tFind
theWay."(marygauthier.com)

TheCoathangers
(Rob'sHouse):
Formedonthe driveto ananti-Bush
rally,thisfeministexperimental
pop-punkquartetfromAtlantais
moreirreverent
thanpolitical,with
tongue-in-cheek
screamers
like
"Don'tTouchMyShit"and"Nestle
in MyBoobies,"
alongside
dancefriendlydittieslike"Shutthe Fuck
Up."(thecoathangers.com)

Haveyouheard
about
anL Word
podcast
following
known
asthe
Kelkians?
Sounds
likesomething
straight
outofRoswell,
doesn't
It?Thenagain,
themysterious
podcasters
dolivein NewMexico.
Albuquerque,
to be exact.Known
simplyas KCand Bka,these Ober
sarcasticand uncensoredlesbians
createda podcastknownas The
Planetbreakingdowneveryepisode
of TheL Wontin Its entirety
whilesippingwine,barkingat theirdogand engagingInfriendly
flirtatiousbanterwithoneanother.AndKelkians
aroundthe world
loveeveryminuteof it - Lyndsay
O'Arcangelo
andwllycld
stal1DOdlJlllillll
on TIieL Mdl
KC:Bka mademedo it!Weslart8dpodcastingwithseasonthreeof
TheLWont.
Elka:Westartedpodcastingaothat we couldgossipaboutour
favoriteshowwithotherfans.Wedidn'texpectit to growintothe
phenomenon
It's become.

100Days100Nights,Sharon
Jones& theDap-Kings
(Daptone):
LikeAmyWinehouse,
doyou?Well,
the Dap-Kings
wereherbandon
morethanhalfof heralbum,but
showcasing
funk-queen
Sharon
Jonesis wheretheyreallyexcel.
Deepfunkfor dayshere,y'all.Turn
it up,andlet looseonthe dance
floor.(daptonerecords.
com)

Divahn
(MizRocky):
ThisNYCbasedcollectiveplaysgorgeous
anddynamicMiddleEastern
and
Sephardic
grooves,
hopingto show
themasses
thatJewishmusicgoes
beyondthe klezmerstereotype,
whilepromoting
mutualunderstanding,peaceandrespectbetween
ArabsandJews.(divahn.corrf)

DidJOUllaveany Ideatllatyouwouldgaina nationalfollowllag?
KC:Wethoughtthat we mightget 100 listeners,not20,000!And,we
havean•intematio11&1
following,•
thankyouverymuch.
Wlllcllofyauwould1118U
a......, guestCMl'ICIII'onTIieL
..,.,, Elka. KC?
KC:Elkawouldmakea betterguestcharacter.She'sa hotscientist.A
labcoatcanbe sexy,right?
Bka:DefinitelyKC.HerhairIsveryshiny.
WbatwouldJ811 1D
• 11leL 11tn1
?
KC:Ironically,
I wouldactuallyHice
maee drama(but,moreta
and steamysex9C81188).
Elka:Moreboobies.AndanothervisitfromghostDana!
..
your
clllnlcllr?
KC:Aliceand Shane.Theyseem
1hemostrelatableof the bundl.
TheirstoryUnes
seemthe mostplausible.ButJennyis the hottest

character.
Elka:I lovedTonyasomuch.I missher whitepants.

I WasJustComforting
Her,
Gretchen
Phillips(Seasick
Sailor):Austin'sGretchen
Phillips
continues
herlifelongdedication
to lezzierockwiththis eclectic
10-songdisc,largelywrittenduring
a recentstayin Parisandfilledwith
ruminations,
includinga supersweetpaeanto herlongtimelove
("Tothe LadyC").(gretchen-phillips.com)
68

I curve

YourTownTonight,
ElizaGilkyson
(RedHouse):
Finally,a liveset
fromoneofTexas'greatestmusical
treasures!Intimateandwarm,
this recording
aptlycapturesthe
folksinger'sessence,
witha setlist
spanningherthree-decade
career,
fromearlyfavoriteslike"Roseof
Sharon"to morerecentclassics
like"Requiem."
(elizagi/kyson.com)
- Margaret
Coble

Wllaldi JOUtwodo
,. .........
,
KC:Whenyousay-,OUtwo,•doyoumean
whatdowe do tDgethtJn
You~
Honestly,durtng Th8L Wontseason,
we spenda lotof
flmean1118
podcast.Wewatchthe showtwice,recordand editthe
podc8lt,respondtoli8llnersand keepouronllnecommunlllesblog,forum,MySpace-up-to-date. Notto mentionourfull-time

careers.
ThePlant1t
Podcatll
canbBfoUndat th8plan8tcaBt.blogspot.com.
ThePlanlllForumIs thep/antJ/aJst.pmbotlrds106.com.
Conlactthe
litlttJntJr
hDIJlne
at (206)203-3552.

Tech Girl

Reviews

Gadgets She'll Go Gaga For
Tech gifts for the wired folks on your list. I By Elle Kaycee
I'm not really one who loves to shop, but so much gift-giving on the brain means I get to dream a lot while I search for that I'll-know-it-when-I-see-it
something. Here's a roundup of gadgets that could be just perfect for the tech girl on your list this holiday.

Can You See Me Now?
A lot of us have families scattered around the country, if not the world, and
choosing whom to visit for the holidays is tough. With Ceiva Digital Photo
Frames with Wi- Fi, you can instantly share that look of happiness you get
while opening presents. Available in 7- or 8-inch sizes, Ceiva frames include
PicturePlan service so you can upload pictures to display instantly on other
frames connected online. Now Aunt Fanny can know just what you look like
in that new knit sweater, without having to download pies from a computer.
($175 and up, ceiva.com)

ltty Bitty USB
Even on my butchest days, I giggle over all the cute little things that now protrude from the other end of USB devices. How can you not love storage drives
like Dynamism's 128MB rubbery iDuck or the Stuffed Hippo with a heart on its
side? USBgeek's Penguin Mouse is also sure to tickle someone's silly side. If you
have a more high-class woman on your list, try the Swarovski-encrusted Active
Crystals line of storage drives from Philips.A line of Active Crystals headphones
is also available.($15 and up, dynamism.com, usbgeek.com, active-crystals.com)

A Pack of iPicks
Apple certainly has given us plenty of options for the musically inclined on
our gift lists. Whether it's an iPod Classic, a Shuffie •in a new color, a fatty
Nano or the iPhone-without-a-phone iPod Touch, there's a bushel of options
to pick from. Sure, she may already have an iPod, but with its increased storage
capacity, and more colors in the rainbow, maybe it's time for another one.
($79 to $399, apple.com)

For the Laser-Loving Lesbo

From top down: Ceiva Digital
Photo Frame with Wi-Fi, USSGeek's Penguin Mouse, Philips'
Active Crystals Storage Drive, the •
iPod Touch and a range of iPods.

I'd be lying if I said the Celluon Laserkey CL800BT made a great first
impression. I laughed at what I thought would be an ultimately uselessalbeit unique-keyboard.
But the chuckles stopped once I considered its
flexibility.This small, wireless box can provide a full-size keyboard for laptops,
smart phones or PD As. It's capable of projecting its red laser keys onto any flat
surface, and its response to finger movement is surprisingly quick and accurate.
(price to be announced, celluon.com) ■

December 2007

I

69

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I 71

Top Ten ReasonsWe Love CourtneySloane

5. She'sa self-madewoman."I built the business
furniture piece by furniture piece and room by
room;' she says about the beginning of her firm.
Sloane worked her way through the designing
ranks, working for Formica Corporation before
breaking out on her own.

6. Yep,she'sa lesbian.Not that it matters, to her
or us. "I view myself as a citizen of the world;' she
says. "I don't necessarily identify myself purely by
my sexuality. What I bring to the project is me,
and that is who I am:'

7. She'sa writer,too!Sloane got her start in media
working as a contributing editor and columnist for
Essence magazine, where her monthly column, "By

Design;' dispensed advice and information. She's
also been featured in two books, How You Livin'
and Designers of Color. She even describes interior
design as a form of storytelling."ln essence, I'm creating a story for (th~ client] that becomes more of
a space or an environment;' she says."! like to think
of myself as a storyteller, but in a physical space:•
Courtney Sloane, founder of Alternative Design
(AD), is one of the country's leading designers
and her influence can be seen most prominently in
hip-hop culture thanks to a roster of A-list clients.
When she founded AD in 1993, hip-hop was
emerging as a powerhouse in pop culture-and
Sloane was at the helm when its influence went
worldwide. Her company has grown immensely.
in 14 years and her client base is hugely diverse.
She does high-end home and office design, commercial design and set design for hot TV shows
like Americas Next Top Model. It seems there's no
stopping this stylish heavy hitter. - Katie Peoples

1. She'sversatile.Sloane has designed everything,
from watches to furniture. Her style is a mix of
high-tech and soft touch. She combines modern
style with African and Asian accents. She's created
the lobby at Vibe magazine, a music studio at Sony
and interiors at Disney, among other things.

"In essence,I'm creatinga story... that becomes

moreof a space or an environment... I liketo thinkof
myselfas a storyteller,
but in a physicalspace."
2002. Sloane was named one of the "emerging designers of the millennium" by the Decorating and
Design Building.

3. She;saccessible:Don't let her place in the
Harnptons or the fact that her clients are celebs
fool you. Sloane is down-to-earth, doing educational specials on HGTV and TLC and offering
design advice for magazines like Seventeen. She
also offers Total Design Prescription, which gives
commercial customers one-on-one help with their
design woes, and Group Therapy, educational sessions held at the AD studios for groups of commercial customers.

8. She's a smarty-pants.
Sloane was educated
at Rutgers University, the Fashion Institute of
Technology and Pratt Institute. She also spent plenty of time simply observing other people create
things-from cabinets to fabrics-in order to learn
how things were made. The experience gave her a
better understanding of her future as a designer.

9. She'sa homebody.
Sloane likes to take time
to live and move in whatever space she's decorating-especially if it's her own. "I like to do more
experimental things that I may or may not do with
clients;' she says. "My place is like a laboratory:'

10.She'sfocusedonyou.Sloane wants her clients
2. Hercompanyis oneof the top designfirmsin
NewYorkCity.AD has made a name for itself as
the go-to shop for hip-hop style, but also made the
House Beautiful Top 101 designer's list for three
consecutive years and Home Design magazine's
Top 100 best architects and decorators list in

121curve

4. She'sworkedwith QueenLatifah.And Diddy.
And Jay-Z. And BET, Essence, Sony Music and
Viacom. Sloane's big break came in 1993 when
she decorated Latifah's house. Ever since, Sloane's
been at the forefront of hip-hop style and design
and her influence on them is immeasurable.

to be as involved as possible. She does extensive
interviews on what they want, and tries to bring
out their personality as much as possible. But it
goes both ways."They've got to be willing to go the
distance because it is as much their responsibility
as it is yours:' ■

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against defamation

www.glaad.org

SAVETHE DATES
January 18to 24, 20
60~ Main Street, Par

For 2008 sponsorship opJ:?
please contact Phil at (323)
or phil@queerloung

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Frankly Speaking

curve
THE BEST-SELLING LESBIAN MAGAZINE

VOLUME 17 NUMBER 10
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San Francisco, California 94103
Phone 415-863-6538 Facsimile 415-863-1609
Advertising Sales 415-863-6538 ext. 10 or 212-446-6700
Subscription Inquiries 818-286-3102
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Frances Stevens
Diane Anderson-Minshall
Sara Jane Keskula
Colleen M. Lee
Katie Peoples
Rachel Pepper
Margaret Coble
Julia Bloch, Victoria A.
Brownworth, Gina Daggett,
Sheryl Kay, Gretchen Lee
Theresa Johnson, Rachel
Leach, Michelle Ma, Remy
Ramirez, Katherine Wright
Stefanie Liang
Amy Silverman
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Kelly Nuti
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Amanda Campa
Tammy Lam
Mea Chavez, Jenna V. Loceff,
Kristin A. Smith, Lina Swislocki
Nicole Teichman, Shari Chang

Contributing Writers Azania Baker, Vanessa Barrington,
Kathy Beige, Jennifer Corday, Lyndsey D'Arcangelo,
Maria Ginsbourg, Michele Fisher, Tania Hammidi,
Jodi Helmer, Kathy lsserman, Elle Kaycee, Charlene
Lichtenstein, Karlyn Lotney, Candace Moore, Aimsel L
Ponti, Laurie K. Schenden, Cait Smith, Ursula Steck,
Kyra Thomson, Jocelyn Voo
Illustrators Phil Cho, Katherine Streeter
Contributing Photographers Erica Beckman, Erica Berger,
Myles Boisen, Skip Bolen, Niall Carroll, David Cooper,
Bob D' Amico, Sharon Dominick, Juan Estey, Daria
Garnliel, Leah Gordon, Sara Jorde, Jen Kennedy, Gary
Kline, Brian Knopp, Amal Kouttab, Michael Loccisano,
Terrence McCarthy, Maggie Parker, Mia Nakano, Chris
Polk, Jacklyn Resciniti, Kathy Sauber, Virginia Sherwood,
Don Spiro, Shea Steel, Willie B Thomas, Denise Truscella,
John Valls, Todd Williams, Kina Williams

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Volume 17 Issue 10 Curve (ISSN 1087-867)() is published monthly (except
fOf bimonthly January/February and July/August) by Outspoken Ent8t'J)rises,
Inc., 1550 Bryant St., Ste. 510, San Francisco, CA 94103. Subscription price:
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A.

I Want It All This Year
Happy Chanukah!
Merry Christmas!
Happy Kwanzaa!
I'm still not sure how it
happened so fast, but
the holidays are upon
us once again.
Frances Stevens Publisher/Editor in Chief

Don't fret, mon amie, we've done all the hard work for you this year. Realizing that you're women on the
go-not women on the go to the mall on the busiest shopping day of the year-we've made shopping
simple for you by lining up a whole slew of goodies for every gal on your list, even your four-legged
friends.
We've packaged 117 gift suggestions into easy-to-navigate sections. So, if you've got a sporty BFF, simply
head right for the adventure section for the coolest new camping gear or fancy new workout equipment
(Hint: I'm in love with Eureka's N!ergy Tent. With its lights and electrical outlets, you can plug in all
your gadgets, including your portable DVD player. So much for roughing it.) If you're not into the
outdoors, don't stress, our other categories include: good baggage; eat, drink and be merry; home swag;
Paul Frank worship; mom, babies and pets; bath, beauty and beyond; ecofriendly green gifts; stocking
stuffers; plus tech, tools and toys. If you're looking to go a bit more kitsch, I'd suggest hitting the date
night section and ordering the new I Heart Brooklyn Girls calendar or the bling page to see where you
can score one of my new favorite tees from Citizen Body. They're super comfy and come in a variety of
regional imprints; mine says "West Coast:'
While we are on the subject of the holidays, our editorial team is also serving up a bevy of tasty treats
and DIY gift suggestions. Lipstick and Dipstick give advice on how to survive spending the holidays with
your girlfriend's family and the hilarious Michele Fisher takes a comical look at re-gifting. After all, we
all need a little comic relief this time of year.
On a more earnest note, our cover interview with musical superstar, Melissa Etheridge, is unequivocally
candid and insightful. I'd have to say that she'sthe one who's speaking frankly this issue. Writer Kathy
Belge grants us access into the world through Melissa Etheridge's eyes, offering insight on who she is
after winning an Oscar, hosting a Democratic presidential debate, performing at Live Earth concerts, undergoing chemotherapy, not to mention being a spokesperson for gay rights and breast cancer awareness.
That's a lot of weight on the shoulders of one woman. Her dedication to giving back to the community
is unprecedented. We love Melissa's courage and strength. You're our hero.

Keyword: Curvemag Web site: curvemag.com

December 2007

I1

Features

December 2007

Volume 17#10

"I was just
like everybody else,
running on
my treadmill,
trying to
get more
money.
When I
stopped ...
I touched
the part
that we're

28

Tennessee city used to have a bad reputation but

all trying to
get to that
we all think
is heaven or

our writer couldn't get enough of this Southern
hotspot. By Jodi Helmer

30

COVER: Can't Keep a Good Woman Down

Our Guide to the Holidays
34

The 117 Hottest Holiday Gifts The coolest
swag that's sure to surprise. We got something for
everyone on your list. By Staff

47

It's a DIV Holiday We go step-by-step on mak-

Melissa Etheridge has been many things: _wife,

ing cool ornaments and tasty gifts that are both

mother, rock star and even cancer survivor. In

economical and ecological. By Vanessa Barrington
and Margaret Coble

our exclusive interview she talks about children,

we think is
nirvana."
Melissa Etheridge
page 30

Choo-Choo Choose Chattanooga This

politics, money and why she'll never have a threesome-again. By ~athy Beige

50

Michelle Wolff Is Hot The latest on what's in
store for the new season of Here!'s Dante's Cove.
By Jennifer Corday

52

Paula Cole Is Back, Baby After years out of

The Hot Lesbians of Theater:
On the Stage in 2007
56 Where the Girts At? Micia Mosely wonders how
much Oakland culture translates in her one-woman show. By Aziana Baker

54

Gay MySpace Superstars Three women
tap into the massive potential of the Web. Plus,
some of our favorite social networking sites and a
YouTube hottie. By Kyra Thomson

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album, being a mom and why she loves lesbians.
By Aimsel L. Ponti

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Denton is anything but a bad seed. By Laurie K.
Schenden

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57 The Low Down on D'Lo Chatting up Sri Lankan
hip-hop comedian D'Loco Kid. By TaniaHammidi
58 Best of Lesbian Theater This year's shining
stars, with a regional twist. By Colleen M. Lee

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Departments

December 2007

"It'snotjust cold
outside,I have
found.The mood
againstgivingin
the UnitedStates
is on the rise.
'Compassion
fatigue'is what
the media callsit.
I call it-to borrow
from Dickenswho
describedit
so well'scrooginess.'"
page 26

1

Frankly Speaking Our fearless
publisher in her own words.

6

17 Curvatures We get a teenage girl's perspective on Facebook and some events
you need to hit this month.

for these foreign films. So You Think You
Can Oance?'s Mia Michaels gets sexy.

and photographers.

Letters Getting political over Margaret

21 Ask Fairy Butch Vacation time. We

63 In the Stacks We take a look at
bisexuality and dirty deeds. Hilary
Goldberg's Giraffe Medicine Book
isn't about animals.

bring you classic Fairy Butch questions.

26 years of art on the world.

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until after the New Year.

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10 Open Studio Kiersten Stein unleashes

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20 Lipstick & Dipstick Text message sex
isn't sex. Or is it? Let us decide.

Cho, and somebody in Milwaukee
wants to buy us a drink.

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CURVE writers

8

60 Sapphic Screen Gear up the subtitles

her favorites for the holidays. Striptease
Battleshiip is powerfully sexy.

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12 Scene Bringing you more hot lady
pix than you can handle.

14 Out in Front It's all about the kids
this month with activists that are working
for a better future.

23 Relationships Home for the Holidays
guide to visiting the family.

69 Tech Grrl Gifts for that special geek in
your life. Plus the coolest USB gadgets
and a laser keyboard. So Jane Bond!

24 Dyke Drama How to avoid being a bad
gift giver and turning your nephew into a
rabid Republican.

and who's in denial.

26 Politics Giving is one addiction for
which you don't need rehab.

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Sloane is the stylish lady behind the
hip-hop renaissance.

16 Lesbofile All the gossip on who's out

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"In stereotypical lesbian fashion, I met my girlfriend 15 years ago at a Melissa Etheridge concert;'
says KathyBeige."We passed the binoculars back and forth, trying to see if one of those necklaces
around her neck was a labrys. Of course, when she came out in 1993, our gaydar was confirmed.
I don't think my life as a lesbian writer would seem complete without an interview with Melissa:'
Belge has made a name for herself as somewhat of a lesbian guru. After 10 years of working as a
counselor for LGBT youth, she is now the guide to all things lesbian on About.com and writes half
of the CURVEadvice column "Lipstick & Dipstick:'

Kathylssennan
loves reading all kinds of books. She loves listening to opinions, especially her own.
So why not turn those two passions into something constructive:' That is why she began writing
book reviews for online and print publications a few years ago. Isserman has a full-time career
in a construction-related field in the Washington, D.C. area and reads on average 20-25 books
a month, mostly LGBT fiction and nonfiction. Reading and working are not her only passions.
Isserman lives with her partner and their two very spoiled cats. She won't reveal her favorite authors
because, of course, reviewers are supposed to be unbiased.

KyraThomson
is a newlywed, so her interest in online social networking has nothing to do with
finding a partner. She lives in British Columbia and works as a teacher and a travel writer for
Gay.com and PlanetOut.com. Thomson's online discovery of the three women featured in her
article was the result of procrastination. She felt inspired to Google; an hour later, she had three
new sites to visit when she "really should have been working on something else:' Oh, what a tangled
World Wide Web we weave.

'Td never written a how-to article before, so I was kind of nervous;' says cuRvE's music review
editor, MargaretCoble,about her tutorial on making holiday ornaments from recycled CDs. 'Tve
been stenciling on recycled vinyl records, scrap wood and various textiles for years, but the idea of
recycling CDs in this way only hit me last holiday season:' Coble is a folk artist and craftswoman,
as well as a retired DJ and freelance music journalist. While she continues to write for CURVEabout
music, her main focus these days is on her crafty biz, art by mags! (artbymags.com). She lives in
Louisville, Ky.-though she hopes to return soon to her hometown of New Orleans.

"Just give me another assignment, already!" This is how Lindsey
J. Taylorfeels on a daily basis. She
is motivated to write and all she wants is another assignment. As for time to do these assignments,
Taylor wishes there were more hours in a day; however, she loves being busy and having awesome
projects to work on. She goes to school, is the arts and entertainment editor for her campus's weekly
paper, works for a local newspaper and has an internship with CURVEmagazine. 'J\nd I couldn't ask
for a better start;' she says. Taylor always has special projects and she plans to do as much as she can
with CURVE."I will be celebrating my year anniversary with CURVEin January and hope to celebrate
many more with them:'

6

Icurve

!BEAT

Letters

" she is dead wrong on Rudy Giuliani

being 'gay positive.' He most definitely is

not! All the Democratic candidates, including Clinton and Obama, recently appeared
What do you

on Logo, a gay/lesbian network on cable TV.
Practically all were very gay positive!"

19%
iPhone We Want Mo' Cho

32%
A newiPod

11%
TomTomGPS

13%
Giftcertificate
from REI

24%

I love Margaret Cho and thoroughly enjoyed your interview with her [Vol. 17 #8], but she is dead wrong on Rudy
Giuliani being "gay positive.n He most definitely is not! All the
Democratic candidates, including Clinton and Obama, recently appeared on Logo, a gay/lesbian network on cable TV.
Practically all were very gay positive! All the Republican candidates were also invited, but not one (including Mr. Giuliani)
responded to their invitation. Is that "gay positive?"
- Elaine Lotcpeich,Marlboro,NJ.
As a long time subscriber in her late 50s, I'd like to comment

I'm alreadysick on Margaret Cho in your October 2007 issue. I also identify
of the holidays! as queer, married to a man. She looked great on the cover, but
it blew my mind when I saw the photo opposite the article.

*According
toa I almost didn't recognize her. That photographer is pretty
curvemag.comamazing to present such totally different views, yet both unonlinepoll. deniably appealing ( as was the other photo, with red and white
stripes-it's like her new nickname should be Yummy Girl).
Good for her that she's happy now! I was also thrilled to read
P.S.Who'sthatgal her political views. If so many of us feel that way too, how
above?
She'sfromthe can we get things changed, confunnit?! And I find it admirable
GetFitwithAliciaiPod that, even in these vexing times, she manages to be a fount of
seriesfromPumpOne. creative energy and joy. Thank you for featuring Margaret Cho.
Pure delight. Made my day. Aloha from Honolulu.
- Kerry Taggart,Honolulu, Hawaii
Editor's Note: We have to admit we loveMargaret, too, and think
she doesa greatjob of always bringingkey issuesto theforefront in
a way that makes everyone think twice about their actions on this
planet. Keep believing,Kerry!

two). Thanks and keep up the good work, ladies.
- Bet-z Boenning, via e-mail
Editor's Note: We leftout thename of thatgreatneighborhood
joint in

WalkersPoint.Its WalkersPint! We'llbe backfor that drink.

Flashing a cuRvEShirt
Hi,just letting you know I received the CURVE T-shirt I ordered
a few days back. What a great-looking item-it's so "flash" it's
almost as cool as a tattoo! Fits well, too. None of these too-loose
men's styles. Just sorry I didn't get it in time to wear to any of
several local performances of Hedwig and the Angry Inch, which
was big fun. Looking forward to wearing it to the next exciting
queer event. (I don't go out a lot, but something will come along
sooner or later!)
- Kerry, via e-mail

Where's Vermillion Lies?
While I was stoked to see some lesser-known artists in the music
issue [Vol. 17 #6)-mosc especially D'Lo. I noticed a void that
can only be filled by the likes of Vermillion Lies. The band is a
collaboration between two sisters who each play a great number
of instruments, including a heater grate and an old metal gas can.
They sound like jazzy freak-folk with a melodic twist, and they
play and perform some of the best live shows, quite often with
a troupe of awesome burlesque dancers. Their songs range from
breakup songs to politically charged sing-alongs to creepy circus
sounds. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to try to sell the band or just
suggest them, so I'll stop here.
- Anna Hardy, via email
Editor's Note: We didn'tforget about the sister duo, Anna; in fact

Have a Beer on Us
Hello, I just wanted to pass a note on to Kelsy Chauvin, who
wrote the article "Milwaukee's Best, Hidden in Plain View:• I
thought she did a really fine job of covering what Milwaukee
has to offer in just three pages. I really believe that it is a wonderful city and getting better every day. Who knows, in the next
couple of years, it may even be worth a cover story. The best
part was her indirect mentioning of my bar. I just wanted her
to know the next time she's in these parts, I owe her a drink (or

s I curve

they werefeatured in our November 2007 issue:"Top 10 Reasons
We Love VermillionLies''.Hope you enjoyedour pieceon that crazy
vaudevillegroup.

Got Something on Your Mind?
E-mail letters@curvemag.com; write to CURVE at Letters, 1550
Bryant St., Ste. 510, San Francisco, CA 94103; fax to 415-8631609. Please include your name, city and state. Letters may be
edited for clarity and length. ■

Onlyin SanFrancisco
You'll have so many new stories to tell, you'll need proof. !=ind out what's new in Sr: at onlyinsanfrancisco.com/gaytravel

Hiiiir.Hi
BYBIJ
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Kiersten Stein
Kiersten Stein has had a long and successful career as a commercial photographer, advertiser
and event coordinator. She co-founded her own company, Unions in Paradise LLC, an eventplanning service in Hawaii. But being raised in a family of artisans nurtured a creative side,
which Stein has been too shy to show the world until recently. Now she's compiling 26 years
of work, ranging from writing and illustration to painting and photography.
''I've always been very artistic;' she says. "I really had no choice. It was in my blood, and it
was all around me:'
She was getting burned out working in the service industry, and that compelled her to
emerge as an artist.
"I make money for other people;' she says of her time with the advertising company that
she founded at 16. "I conceptualize for other people. My creativity is for other people. So I
needed to come to a place where I was giving back to myself:'
Her first two series as an emerging artist, "Mosaics" and "Quilts;' expressed her views on
the intricacies of life. Her favorite subjects are the flora and fauna of Maui, and her patterns
are inspired by the quilting she did with her grandmother. Her work brings details of life to
the viewer and has inspired a perceptive change among her gallery's
visitors.
Her amazing photographs
display vibrant color up close and
personal using a macro/wideangle technique. Stein prefers to
shoot her subjects in natural light,
without any enhancements. If a breeze blows a feather out of focus, she allows it to
happen, creating an amazing image of motion.
"I can spend five hours shooting one flower. No joke;' she says.
Her other series, "Water Garden;' also brings the haziness of coral reefs into colorful clarity and gives her work a surreal, almost alien feeling.
"I like to play with depth of field;' Stein says."So everything does not have to be
crisp, because everything in life is not crisp:'

10

I curve

1 Attorneys celebrate at the Bay Area Lawyers for Individual Freedom's annual picnic.
Pictured (in no certain order): Lisa McCally, Angie Dalfen (of Pride Law), Katie Kolan,
Liz Noteware and a law student. BALIF is the country's oldest and largest LGBT bar as~
sociation 2 Moving it at Chicago AIDS Foundation's Annual AIDS Run/Walk 3 Writer,
director and producer Nitara Lee Osbourne (second from left) with her cast and crew at a
Phoneix fundraiser for Running on Empty 4 Leslie Grossman (left) and Carly Pope at L.A:s
Itty Bitty Titty Committe premier 5 Good Vibes assistant manager Corie McMillan (left)
and girlfriend Monica Barnes flank Good Vibes board member Margaret Cho at the San
Francisco premier of Barn Barn and Celeste 6 Deborah Paul (the grown up) and friends of
Christie's Place help celebrate the 18th Annual AIDS Walk in San Diego

121 curve

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©2007 Mercedes-Benz USA, LLC

Designedto keepeyesontheroad,handson thewheel
andboredom
in therearviewmirror.
INTRODUCING THE ALL-NEW 2008 C-CLASS.
Why did we devote so much research to the placement

The car's dexterous handling is complemented by

of every switch and

a pair of V-6 engines, which deliver rocket-like torque,

every dial? Why did

even at low rpm, through the category's only 7-speed

we study the driver's

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seat

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Optimistic Activist

Fighting Complacency

Her mom was an antiwar activist in the' 60s, her
dad, the son of a Harlem numbers runner, and

Even as a doctoral student at American University

she was born in New York City just weeks after
the assassination of Martin Luther King, Jr.
It's in TanyaMayo'sDNA to be a revolutionary and use grassroots activism in the fight
for social justice. "I have spent more than half
my life speaking out," says the 39-year-old
biracial Bay Area artist, youth advocate and
queer activist. "But more importantly, putting

keeps up with her other activities. From creating a
linguistic-anthropological method of communication with politicians that involves topics of gender
and sexuality, to working with the Child Welfare
League of America in creating the first report on
LGBT youth experiences in the foster care system,
to publishing, lecturing and embarking on her dissertation research, there's little downtime.

my words into action to create systemic change
in what I consider an unjust society:'
In addition to her recent stint as a national

Her convictions are deeply rooted in her teens,
when she came out and endured gay-bashing by

organizer for Not in Our Name, Mayo has
also served as the executive director of Loco

childhood friends who thought they could make
her straight. She was scared and alienated, but she

Bloco Drum and Dance ensemble, the youth

was also well-informed and was able to find com-

program director at Brava for Women in
the Arts, and a core member of the Medea
Project: Theater for Incarcerated Women.

fort in news reports that showed gay activists and
the Pride movement.
"I knew I wanted to be a part of that struggle;'
says Marzullo. 'There's this conversation that you

Today, as program director of the Gay.Straight Alliance Network, Mayo says she is

have to have with yourself about being honest,

also am inspired to see the gender nonconfor-

about really looking into your heart and agreeing
with yourself about the struggle, about the fact
that you are all right the way you are:'
While she believes the LGBT movement has
certainly made some strides, she does not believe

mity of this younger generation:'
Today, Mayo is even more focused on that

that young gay people have a clear path to equal
rights in the U.S., and she warns against com-

future, as she just celebrated the first birthday
of her son, Kekoa Nelson Mayo.
"I hope to raise a kind, gentle, courageous
person in a harsh world," Mayo says. "I hope
to raise him to see the injustices and have the

placency in the struggle for the queer cause and
the rights of all marginalized members of
society.
"We must remain watchful to be sure that

beginning to see a bit of light at the end of
the tunnel. "I am inspired daily by the youth
movement within the LGBT scene and marvel
at the passion of the straight allies;' she says. "I

courage to go up against them:'

If you know of any LGBT activists
or any women who are Out in Front
at work, home or in the community,
please let us know by writing to
curvesoutinfront@hotmail.com.

14lcurve

and a Carlos Enrique Cisneros scholar through
the Point Foundation, MichelleMarzullostill

our successes do not equate to status quo apathy when it comes to others who share in similar struggles, whether in regard to race, socialclass status, ethnicity or income;' says Marzullo.
"If there is a worry I have, it's that many gay and
lesbian people might become complacent with
our gains and not translate our experiences of
oppression to others:'

I

•

Ive been~
ve~ good girl...

Curvatures

Lesbofile

Coming Out Only to Go BackIn
I

These suspicious stars deny, deny, deny. By Jocelyn Voo

This month, girls are coming out (or staying in)
in droves. The one common thread? It's all being
documented by the media-or MySpace.

Sugar and Spice
Despite her whirlwind marriage in June-not
long after she gave birth to ex-boyfriend Eddie
Murphy's baby-Melanie
Brown, aka Scary
Spice, is being pulled back into the rumor mill as
two women claim they started a two-year affair
with the singer in 2004.
Christa Parker, a 35-year-old mother of two,
claims she and Brown started their affair after
meeting at the school where both their children
are students. Parker then introduced Brown to
her friend Elizabeth Rodriguez, a 26-year-old
sex-toy saleswoman, and the three women would
occasionally hit the sack. Says Parker, "I had only
had sex with a woman once before ... but Mel was
obviously very experienced with women:'
Pictures of Brown kissing a woman appeared
in the U.K:s Daily Mail in 2004. Parker claims
the honeymoon was over once Brown started seeing Murphy, but now she's dragging the skeletons
out of the closet because she's concerned about
Brown's "fragile emotional state'' ... as if Brown
hadn't always been considered the kooky one.

The Real (Gay) World
On the last season of MTV's classic teenage drama TheReal World: Denver, there were the usual
suspects: the gay guy, the sexually uninhibited girl,
the token cute white guy, the black guy with sensationalized anger issues and the emotionally unstable Southern belle. That season's emotionally
unstable one was Brooke LaBarbera, best known
for breaking down in hysterical crying fits-a lot.
But LaBarbera has recently been making news
as something else: a newly outed bisexual, purportedly in a relationship with fellow MTVer
Evelyn "Ev" Smith, who competed in The Real
World/Road Rules Challenge: Fresh Meat. Both
Smith and LaBarbera's MySpace profiles feature
photos of the two of them cheek-to-cheek.
In fact, for a short time, LaBarbera's public
profile listed her sexual orientation as bisexual,
according to an AfterEllen.com article published
on August 24. However, just a week later, in an
August 31 MySpace blog entry, LaBarbera wrote
a gushing love letter to the gay community but de-

16

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nied being gay hersel£ "I love gay people .... I have
this almost fixation on gay people. I think I've always felt that way;' she writes. "I think part of the
reason I love gay people so much is because I enjoy the gay community-I find it is accepting and
open, which are qualities I relish;' she continued.
"Even though I am not gay mysel£ I feel invited
and loved in their atmosphere:'
Gay, straight, bi, questioning-it's all the same,
Brooke. Welcome to our world.

All About Eve
For a while now, rumors have circulated that rapper Eve was in the closet. But in a recent interview with HX magazine, she just laughs it off: "I
get more accusations than I actually do get hit on
now;' she says. "Gay women are way more aggressive than men-I will definitely say that. But it
doesn't bother me. If I'm like, 'Yo, I get it, but I
don't swing that way; then it's all love:'
As far as her music is concerned, "I always felt

good if a gay person gave me props. Honestly, I
feel like if a gay person gives you props, you must
be doing something right;' she says. "I wish I remembered this drag queen's name. . . . I was in
downtown New York and she pulled me to the
side and she was like, 'Girl, you are hot! OK? You
don't let nobody tell you different!'"

A Shot of Tequila
The reality TV genre is already overburdened with
trash-tastic dating shows where hetero singles seek
their soul mate. But now, openly bisexual modelactress-singer Tila Tequila is looking for one good
man or woman on her new MTV reality show,
A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila. Crowned "the
Madonna of MySpace" by Time magazine, with
over 1.5 million "friends;' she has graced the cover
of many a men's magazine wearing little more than
what amounts to a rubber band. "May the better
sex win my love;' the vixen says. Consider that a
gauntlet being thrown down. ■

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Curvatures

Out and About This Holiday Season
33rdAnnual
Alliance
Children's
Theatre's
Christmas Utah Gay and LesbianSki Week (Park
House(Atlanta,Ga.,Nov.17-Dec.9, ticket price: City,Utah,Jan. 9-13): What began as a

$20):Help support the Alliance Children's Theatre
by visiting their Christmas House. Each year, city
designers and florists decorate one of Atlanta's
beautiful homes for the holidays, then open it for
the public to enjoy.Tues.-Fri.10 a.m.-4 p.m., Sat.
10 a.m.-5 p.m., Sun. 1 p.m.-5 p.m.

WorldAIDSDay (Dec.1): Ninety-five percent of the people living with HIV/ AIDS
are in developing countries. Raise awareness
and show support by wearing a red ribbon,
and take part in local events, such as New
York City's traditional candlelight vigil.

HollyFolly(Provincetown,
Mass.,Nov.30 -Dec.2):
P-town, known as a summer vacation hotspot,
revamped its Christmas celebration with Holly
Folly 11 years ago and created the world's only gay
and lesbian holiday party. It's been a huge success
ever since. (hollyfolly.com)

Proposition 2 boycott has turned into an
annual event. Take a breather after the holidays and escape to the mountains, where
you and the gals can hit the slopes or just
play in the snow for a whole week. (877429-6368 for more info)

MummersParade(Philadelphia,
Dec. 31
-Jan.1): Every year more than 12,000 men,
women and children dress in colorful costumes and strut through Philadelphia. The
Mummers take to the streets of Philly on
New Year's Day for a traditional celebration that predates the Revolution. One of
the first events to reach out to the gay community, the Mummers Parade ends in the
"Gayborhood" where the party goes on
into the next morning. The parade includes
string bands, colorful costumes and brigades
of jokers. (mummers.com) - KristinA. Smith

DON'T MISS THE BOAT!
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Don't miss the boat! Join us on "r" next cruise and enjoy special events including singles mixers, dinners and customized
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Knapp. Grab your gear and bring along your friends and family and experience the magic of an R Family Vacations Cruise.
To reserve your staterooms today call 1-866-rfam-vac or your travel agent. Learn more by visiting rfamilyvacations.com.

December 2007

I 17

Curvatures

Teen Tales ofFacebook
As a new junior at the Culver Academies in the
Indiana countryside, I had to find a way to keep
in touch with my friends. At my new school, cell
phones rarely work, MySpace is blocked and mail
is very slow. This leaves us technology-starved
teenagers with only one option: Facebook.
Facebook is the fastest, easiest, trendiest way for
me to keep up with friends back home, new friends
and co-workers. Eighty-five percent of Facebook
users log in weekly.
I began using Facebook during my freshman
year because my mother would not allow me to
have a MySpace or Xanga account. Looking back,
I cannot blame her because I have had a profile on
each site and among them Facebook has caused
me the least trouble. It became a quicker, safer
way to meet people. Mark Zuckerberg developed
Facebook for just this reason. He launched the site
in February 2004. Today, 34 million people are on
Facebook and chances are that you know at least
one of them.
On Facebook, you can find many different, fun

, ...
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features. You can add pictures and show off albums.
"The Wall" is where you can type a public message
on a friend's profile. However, if you want to be
more discreet, you can also send them a private
message. Groups on Facebook are a great way to
meet people with similar interests. Some of them
are silly, like I Dance Around in My Underwear;
and I Wish My Homework Was Asexual So It
Would Do Itself Some groups, however, support
serious causes. For example, the Gay-Straight
Alliance at my old school used a Facebook group
to keep track of members and let them know about
important events. Anyone can make, or join, a
Facebook group. Facebook also has a mobile feature, so you can take it with you wherever you go.
As with any social networking site, there are
precautions you should take when using Facebook.
First, be careful about what you put on your site
and who you add as a friend. Facebook can possibly make it easier for someone to stalk you. If this
happens, you can block the person and they will no
longer be able to view your site. The best thing you

*-

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18

can do to prevent this is to make your Facebook
profile private and never put any contact information, such as phone numbers or a street address on
your profile.
And please, never put any potentially embarrassing photos on your Facebook site. Employers
can easily have access to them and a picture of
"wild partying" could possibly cost you your job.
Any photos that are sexually explicit, or of drugs
or alcohol, can tarnish your reputation. Facebook
may also ask you to remove these photos if they
receive a complaint.
Finally, never give anyone your password!
With your password, a person can also access personal information and read your private messages.
Some of my peers have had to shut down their
profiles because they gave out their password and
someone else got onto their site. While this is rare,
it is also preventable. Still, out of all the social networking sites I have used, Facebook is definitely
my favorite. -Cait Smith

*

Comic relief
Individual ~

Is $641 billion just a joke?
Gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people show up in commercials all the
time, but not because of our buying power. Advertisers often use sissies, leather
men and trans individuals as a punch line. We know they can do better.
Commercial Closet Association educates corporations, ad agencies and
universities on informed portrayals of the GLBT community for a more accepting
society while achieving business results. We're a non-profit organization that
works not as a pressure group, but by providing business guidance through:
• Advertising Sensitivity training

• Original data reports

• Best Practices guidelines

• 3,000+ ad library spanning
85 years and 33 countries, with
ratings and feedback

• Annual IMAGES IN
ADVERTISINGAWARDS
• Journalistic coverage of GLBT
issues in advertising

• Leveraging relationships with
businesses, trade organizations,
- universities and the media

We're all more than just a joke. Let's educate corporate advertisers to leave
the GLBT stereotype punch lines in the past, and start planning for the f

Commercial
Closet
Association
Learn more at commercialcloset.org

Advice

Lipstick & Dipstick

Is Text Sex Real Sex?
Dear Lipstick and Dipstick: Does text sex
count as real sex? You're using your mind
to get a reaction, not your body. You don't
have contact from the other person. You
use your brain to figure out how you'll react and what you'll do to the person in
response, but again have no real physical
contact with the other person. So, is it real
or not? - SxyTxyGrl

Dipstick:
No, it's not real. Just as reading erotica is
not the same as having sex, sending a juicy e~mail
or text message is not skin~on~skin lovin'.You can
type to someone what you wish you were doing,
but you're not doingit. There's a big difference..

Lipstick:
Well, that all depends on where you hold
the phone. And if it's on vibrate. Are you holding
it in that special spot-a little to the left and just
where you like it? To me, sexting is no different
from cybersexing, but really, how do you even
know you've had sex in the first place? There aren't
any qualifiers. Lesbian sex is subjective and means
something different to each of us. Is it when her
hand passes your panty line? When your tongue
touches her skin? When your thingamabob goes

into her hoohoo? What sex is to me may not be
sex to you. I'd spend less time worrying about
what it is and more time getting it.

Dear Lipstick and Dipstick: I am a 25-yearold lesbian in an awesome long-term relationship that is slowly making its way to the
altar. Here's the twist: My mom is a lesbian,
but she does not approve of me being one.
I love both of these women and really don't
want to lose either of them. I'm afraid to go
ahead with my engagement. It is important
to me to have my mother's blessing and my
lovely girlfriend understands this. What do I
do? - Bearing Mom's Burden

Dipstick:
As puzzling as this is, your mom's reaction
is common. Abigail Garner, the author of Families
Like Mine, calls this the Second Generation
Syndrome. Even though it's fucked up, your mom
may feel she has failed as a lesbian parent by pro~
ducing a gay child. I know, you would think she
of all people would realize you didn't choose to
be gay. But somehow she feels that having a queer
child makes gay parents look bad in society's eyes.
Your mom may be too caught up in what others

think about her. The
saddest part • is not
just that your mom is
refusing to participate
in your wedding, but
that you're missing all the
lesbo wisdom she could pass on, like
how to find the best B&B in Provincetown, how
to throw a fast pitch, and most importantly, if you
and your partner decide to have children, how to
answer the question "Where's daddy?" Go ahead
with your engagement. Invite your mom to be in
on the planning. Maybe picking out the wedding
cake will soften her up. But don't, for any reason,
give up the life you were meant to live just to gain
the approval of someone else, no matter who she
is.

Lipstick:Hmmm. I'm not sure we're getting the
whole story here, Dipstick. Bearing Mom's Burden,
tell your mom to write to us-we want to hear her
side. For now, this sounds like she's either got a
classic case of deeply internalized homophobia, or
she's a control freak, or she's got WTF syndrome.
Regardless, the bottom line is you're an adult. As
long as you're not hurting anyone, she should be
supportive, period. Unless, of course, there's some~
thing you're not telling us-like you go through
all kinds of extreme phases, e.g. you were recently
convinced that you're a Scientologist, or adopted,
or a man, only to wake up one day and change your
mind, maybe she's looking out for your girlfriend.
Dear Lipstick & Dipstick: As far back as I
can remember, I've loved girls. I like the way
they smell and look. Growing up, I played
games so I could touch my girlfriends and
even remember making out with a few of
them under a pool table. As I got older, I
was interested in cheerleading and gymnastics; I became popular at school, and
even though I was secretly dating women,
I also started dating boys because my
friends were. I only stopped dating men recently, when, after all these years, I realized
it was a waste of time, as all I think about
when I'm out with them is other women.
So, now I'm almost 30 and hardly even notice men. If there's a room full of men and
only one female, I'll find her. Recently, I've
even gone to the local gay bar and had a
one-night stand or two. Besides that, I've

20

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Ask Fairy Butch Advice

Best of Fairy
Butch 2.0
totally fallen in love with a friend of mine.
Is it possible that all this time, I've been
a lesbian and was just fighting it? Is it
just another phase (as my mother put it),
or do you girls think I'm really a lesbian?
- Popular but Pining for Pussy

Lipstick:Bingo! Ding, ding! Get the lady a
toaster oven! You are such a dyke. You only see
the boobs in a room full of men? You're wildly in
love with a woman and it's not your first time?
You're not only a lesbian, Triple P-you're me!
Weve had parallel lives: I was a cheerleader and
did gymnastics, too, and didn't stop dating guys
in hopes that, damnit, I was straight. Well, sit
tight. Your outlook on this whole thing will
soon change. (I can forecast it for you, since
were the same person.) If you're open to it,
which you will be, you'll find your home in the
lesbian community and get to the point where
you'll be grateful you're a dyke, not sorrowful.
I wouldn't change my sexuality for the world!
If you allow your gay-self time to blossom, you
won't be wondering anymore either, and, just
like Lipstick, you'll be on your knees thanking
God you're a certified rug-muncher!

The sexpert is on vacation.
Enter the classics.

Dear Fairy Butch: I
read your column
all the time, and it
has been very helpful. I'm 20 years old and met
a terrific woman online who is 15 years older than I am. I really love her and have never
felt this way about a woman in my whole
life! I was curious, though, if you think the
age difference will cause problems between
us. - Baby Butch Boi in Bakersfield

DearBabyBoi:In a word, cherub: Yes. While the
two of you may bask in the glow of the computer's
glare off your shared instant messages, once you've
brought your love out into the wide-open spaces,
it's more likely to crop up. Age is among the factors
that will pose problems for any couple. Problems
are part of the package. Thus, the age scenario
doesn't negate your chances of long-term bliss, it
just lengthens the odds-considerably. But who
knows? Maybe you'll buck conventional wisdom
and live happily ever after. (From vol. 11 #3)

Dipstick:Sometimes even Dipstick notices
men, if they're dressed especially nice. I think,
"How would that suit look on me? How would
his wife look on my arm? Do you think he'd let
me take his Lamborghini for a spin around the
block?" But other than that, men serve no purpose to dykes like you and me, unless they're
gay and they've come to help dress us for our
first big same-sex date. Welcome to the club,
sister. Makes no difference if you discover it
at 15 or SO-you're a true-blue, all-American
lesbian!

Lipstick:Did you even read the question,

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Dipstick? You're on your men-aren't-necessary
kick again. Remember, if we didn't have sperm,
which, I might remind you, doesn't come easy
out of those silicone toys, there would be no
more little lipsticks and dipsticks and no one to
poke fun at when they wander into the lesbian
bar looking for a threesome. Straight men are
silly, but in-between jobs, they're filling up our
sperm banks. ■
Ask us anything about sex, love or lesbians at
lipstickdipstick.com.

Dear Fairy Butch: I am a 22-year-old dyke,
and I have just had a wonderful experience
with the femme dom of my dreams! I'm pretty new to the top-bottom thing, and I don't
know who should plan this next date: her,
because she's the top; or me, since I initiated it. I would be indebted to you for your
help in this affair. - Nervous N.Y. Nelly

DearNervousNelly:First of all, congratulations
are in order! You've demonstrated a capacity for
expressing yourself in a respectful manner, and
I think it would be most appropriate if you were
to apply that tone in a question to this damsel as
well. If you would like to plan the date, call her, or
better yet, send a polite, well-penned note asking
her if she would honor you with her presence at
a particular place and time. But if she reserves the
privilege of determining these details, then you'll
know that she expects to retain complete control.
If you act on some carefully worded questions for
your new amor, it's quite possible that she'll find
such ministrations to be a refreshing and charming
change of pace. (From vol. 8#3) ■

December 2007

I 21

Advice

Astro Grrl

'Tis the Season
Although Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 22)
Sex: Get the vibe as she contacts you telepathically this
you work December, but don't get your signals crossed and wind up on
the wrong side of the mistletoe. Double check all plans. Career:
hard,Sag, Although you work hard, Sag, you may not see any results beNew Year's. So why go the distance when you won't even
you may fore
get cab fare? Escape ... or delegate.
not see any
Capricorn (Dec. 23-Jan. 20)
resultsbe- Sex: Caps might confuse gal pals with lovergrrls this December.
Blame it on the spiked eggnog and leave it at that. Career:
They
fore New love you at work. They think you are indispensable. Do they
Year's.So realize what you are really up to? Uh, oh.
why go the Aquarius (Jan. 21-Feb. 19)
Sex: Aqueerians are tempted to sleep
distance their way up the corporate ladder. Beware
of tread marks and that long slide down
when you when the affair ends. Career:You can do
wrong at work this December. Does
won't no
that mean sitting on the Xerox machine
even get is a good business move? Your call.
cab fare? Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20)
Sex: Guppies have a special charm this
Escape ... December. Use it to ward off unwanted
Then again, are any really unor delegate. advances.
wanted? Career:
Mixing business with

Cancer (June 22-July 23)
Sex: Be sure to attend all holiday parties. Your New Year's affaire d'amour is at one of them. Let's hope she's at the correct
Cheney event. Career:Prepare for a dramatic change at work.
Does that mean they will recognize all your efforts in the past
year? Considering what those were, let's hope not.
Leo (July 24-Aug. 23)
Sex: Proud Lionesses are homebodies this December. And there

may be one or two other bodies you can home in on during the
holidays. Career:Your job gets better and better through the
month. Try a few new things at work and see if anyone notices.
Errr, deck the halls?

pleasure sounds like a good idea but can
actually result in a lousy outcome. You
don't care as long as you get that raise
... or is it rise?

Aries (March 21-April 20)
Sex: Lambda Rams tear up the sheets with their sexploits this
December. What is in that lovely gift box? Unwrap it, but don't
kiss and tell! Career:
Career prospects brighten toward the end
of the month. Maybe it's because it's Christmas vacation and
you are out of the office.

Virgo (Aug. 24-Sept. 23)
Sex: Gal pals may get you into trouble, but you find that you can
talk your way out of it. Or maybe you won't want to get out of it.
Career:
Your intuition compels you to take a risk at work. How
big a risk is up to you, but somehow volunteering to count the
petty cash is not an option.
Libra (Sept. 24-0ct. 23)

221

curve

Taurus (April 21-May 21}
Sex: Partners and would-be lovergrrls are all over you. Is it your
animal magnetism, Sapphic Bull, or your bonus check? Career:
You daydream the hours away at work. Senior staff thinks that
you are much more productive than usual. Ahem.

Sex: You may think that love is free, but it really wears a price tag

Gemini (May 22-June 21}
Sex: Pace yourself this December, Twin. You will have more
than your fair share of lovelies to meet under the mistletoe.
Ho, ho, ho. Hey, who are you calling a ho? Career:
Tongues wag
at work as you heat up the water cooler to a rapid boil. "Miss
Chief" will get you fringe benefits.

Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22)
Sex: Women gravitate to you like moths to a flame. Will you
singe their wings or burn 'em to a crisp? Pack the marshmallows.
Career:Scarps don't feel like working this December. How
about taking a break with a certain lovely holiday elf? ■
Visit Charlene Lichtenstein, online at thestarryeye.com.

this December. Will you be a sap again for just another pretty
face? So what else is new? Career:
Libras are ready and raring to
go, go, go on the job. But don't bite off more than you can chew,
tempting though it might be.

Relationships Advice

Homo for the Holidays
Lipstick & Dipstick's simple rules for surviving the season.
For those couples who will be spending the holidays with family, be it the
first time or the 20th, may the stars shine bright wherever you are and may
you keep your sanity amidst the twinkling chaos. No matter where you spend
your holidays this year, cuRvB's advice gurus are sending lots of holiday cheer
and hoping you don't make an ass of yourself

Lipstick'sTips for Going Home with Your Honey
"Do You Queer What I Queer?" This is the song I was singing when I got off
the plane in Texas on Christmas Eve many years ago. It was the first time I
went home with my wife for the holidays. Upon arrival, what I immediately
noticed about the small Southern town was that Texans did not queer what I
queer. In fact, they didn't appear to queer at all. I'm sure there were some buttbumping cowboys on the edge of town and a dyke who built A-frame houses,
but I didn't see them. What I did see was a number oflarge, awkwardly moving machines pumping oil out of the ground and enormous trucks blaring
Toby Keith. My partner assured me that there was a gay bar in town. "Prove
it;' I've said every year we've gone back, but she's never taken me. Instead, we
just sit around playing gin rummy and listening to Lou Rawls.
I'm telling this story because I want you all to know, I feel your holiday
pain. And I want to share some tips from the trenches.

2. PrepareYourGal:Does Grandpa gets touchy after his third schnapps? Is
your sister born again and uncomfortable with you talking to her kids? Make
sure she knows exactly what she's getting herself into.

2. LetThemPicktheMovies:Christmas is not only about decorating the tree,
hanging lights and giving gifts, it's also about seeing movies. My suggestion to
rent BrokebackMountain went over as well as her grandmother's haggis pie.
Do yourself a favor and let her mom pick.

3. SetRealisticExpectations:
What do you hope to get out of this visit? Make
it through dinner without a fight? Good. Convince Uncle Henry that gay marriage should be allowed in all 50 states? A great goal, but probably won't be
accomplished over one deep-fried turkey.

3. BringGifts:Good ones, too. And give her mom the nicest one of all-like a
full day at a spa or a gift card to Neiman Marcus.

4. TakePartin FamilyActivities:
Are Mom and Sister Sue hitting the afterChristmas sales? Get up at 4 a.m. and join them. Throw a football out back
with your cousins, and of course, pitch in with cooking and deaning.

5. DrinkEggNog:Make sure it's strong and keep your glass full.

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1. PlanAhead:Be dear with your parents that you're bringing your girlfriend.
If Mom won't let you sleep in the same room, then consider staying in a motel.

1. TakePrivateBathroom
Time:Take as much time as you can get. If there's a
bathtub, even better: fill it up and soak for an hour.

4. Treatthe Animalswith HighRegard:Don't forget to bring gifts for the
pets, too, especially if one of them is an aggressive German shorthair named
Tommy. Steer clear of him.

~

Dipstick'sTips for BringingYour Honey Home for the Holidays
My parent's house is the one families drive across town to see each year.
Thousands of lights. Think Clark Griswold. In addition to the endless strands
outlining the house, there are three lighted trees in the front yard, a full-size
Santa with his reindeer in the driveway and 27 glowing snowmen on the roof
My girlfriend comes from a family that doesn't celebrate Christmas. She
was nervous enough about walking through the light display, but to make matters worse, she knew she'd have to meet all 50 of the Dipstick clan. Poor thing
got cornered by Aunt Shelly and her healing magnets spiel for almost 45 minutes before I could rescue her.
But I knew if she could survive a Dipstick family Christmas, she was a
keeper. Aside from the whipped cream faux pas, she did just great. (Note to
vegans: Just pass on the whipped cream. Don't try to whip up a tofu substitute.
It will make you the butt of jokes for years to come.) Now my mom keeps the
guest room open for us every year and the whole family looks forward to my
girlfriend's famous apple kuchen.

Despite what I go through during my Texas holidays,
and even though I sometimes sacrifice time with
my own family, there's nothing like waking up in
my partner's arms on Christmas morning. At that
moment it's all worth it. And that, my fellow dykes,
is what keeps me getting on the plane each Christmas
season. It's not just because they have damn good barbeque in Texas or because I've yet to beat her grandmother in cards (I'm certain this is my year). It's because
'tis the season to be jolly, and nothing makes me jollier than
being with my girl-even if her folks have a W sticker on
their car.

5. Breathe:
Remember we must take in oxygen to survive. It will be over soon.
Make your visit short. Five days max. ■

Dyke Drama

Michele Fisher

The Miracle of Re ...Gifting
This year, you can keep your crappy reindeer.

Last year, a friend gave me some adorable, old,fashioned, Christmas,themed
nesting boxes. You know, the kind that 6.t into one another until the last one is
only big enough to hold a strawberry, like in a Dr. Seuss story. I loved themespecially when I picked them out for her a few years earlier.
It was one of those moments that was so cliche it didn't seem like it could
ever happen.
At first I feigned interest, then delight. Then I broke down laughing, both
at the situation and at my ludicrous attempt at a coverup. Through guffaws, I
reminded her of where she had acquired my gift At first she looked horror,
stricken, but soon she joined me in a hearty laugh.
Re,gifting requires memory cells that I no longer possess, so I don't even try
it. But that same friend is still a notorious re,gifter, so look forward to hearing
more about her in next year's holiday issue.
The worst gift I ever got was a costume jewelry,encrusted plywood cross
about the size of a textbook. It had a handy hook on the back so I could display
it on my wall (as if). My sister got a matching one-well, not exactly match,
ing, because the cast,off clip,on earrings on mine were mostly lime green and
?anana yellow, while my sister's were more of a mustard and melon combo.

We were horrified, as only preteens can be, when we opened our presents from
the Norwegian neighbor down the street and found those goddamned crosses.
Later that night, when we were alone in our room, my sacrilegious sister and I
fought a duel with our respective crosses and laughed ourselves silly.
Only the holidays could make me envy heterosexuals. All hets have to do
is stop at the mall, thro~ some stuff into bags, take it home, toss a bow on
everything and presto, another great Christmas.
But if you are a dyke, every lezzie on your list expects a thoughtful, fair,
trade, environmentally friendly gift. It's too much pressure.
This year, every dyke on my list is getting a steam,powered vibrator, made
in the U.S.A.
Then you gotta deal with the whole I'm,not,sure,blank,celebrates,
Christmas dilemma. You don't want to offend anybody by giving them a gift,
of course. I wish everybody would offend me by giving me a gift. (OK, not
stupid crosses.)
Hey, Christmas is about giving, right? So, as long as you are not foisting a
gift on a Buddhist, an atheist or a Jew with the idea that you will be similarly
rewarded, then you are celebrating your holiday the right way.
No fair rolling your eyes while you are handing off your gift
and mumbling, "I know you are a heathen, but I still got you a pres,
ent, even though I know I won't be getting jack from you:' Kinda
defeats the whole holiday spirit thing.
You can turn a few token gifts into endless free meals and
fun by letting your non,Christmas,celebrating friends know that
you are open to celebrating their traditions as well. I now eel,
ebrate Tet, Chinese New Year, Diwali, Eid ul,Fitr and anything
else I can get invited to. Christians haven't cornered the market
on guilt, so believe me when I tell you that those little gifts you
give in December will be money well spent when those who feel
obligated to return the favor start calling.
Just make sure you are accepting an invitation to a feasting, not
a fasting, holiday. Believe me, Purim is fun; Yorn Kippur is not.
My friends who do celebrate the holidays will be happy
to know about one change I have made this year. No more
Christmas tree,shaped Jell,O molds or faux gingerbread light,up
Santa's workshops will be coming your way from me this season.
I used to think Christmas,chemed gifts (like old,fashioned
nesting boxes) were fab until last November, when I was rifling
through the countless items in my overpacked storage locker,
looking for the Christmas,themed gifts that I had to display in
my home. As I pried each box open, I had to consider whether
the person who gave me each item was: a) still alive b) likely
to visit me during the holiday season c) the kind of person
who would be devastated if she didn't see the item she gave me
on display.
I spent hours in that crappy locker, my hands covered in
newsprint and my mind ticking off all the great ways I could have
been spending the day. I then cursed everybody who ever gave me
Mr. and Mrs. Santa salt,and,pepper shakers and Property of the
North Pole tea towels. I thought about holding a lighter up to

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the sprinkler head in the ceiling of my unit so that I could righteously claim
water damage as the reason I had not lugged out all my Christmas "treasures"
that year. But those thoughtful folks who had given me the ho-ho-holiday
crap in the first place would just be motivated to flood me with replacement
items, so I kept opening and repacking the boxes until my car was full and
my brain would no longer take no for an answer to that Valium I had been
promising it.
Some people prefer to go giftless. There is a reason that people who throw
Christmas parties often write "No gifts, please" at the bottom of their invitations. They know they are going to get cruddy gifts. And even if you do put
that humble little postscript on your invitations, you are still going to get a
few crumb bums who thrust castoffs from their own storage lockers into your
hands and say,"I know you said no gifts, but I just couldn't resist:'
You are much better off writing "Bring one gift for a group exchange'' on
your invitations. That way, your circle of friends can pass on to one another
that same candy cane candle, Reindeer Crossing street sign and winter wonderland bric-a-brac, instead of foisting it all off on you.
I have covered the topic of what I think about homemade gifts before.
Suffice it to say that you should only give them if you are truly an artisan. Not
if your mom or second-grade teacher told you so, but if strangers, who have
no idea that you were the craftsperson, call your work masterful. I do not
think my Norwegian neighbor would have qualified.
And then there is the whole suitability issue. Did somebody really think
that I, an insomniac since birth, would want a set of ceramic wind chimes?
Sure, the gal who gave them to me was truly an artisan, but an ashtray would

have been more thoughtful.
You know what gift really sucks? Those holiday coupons. You know, the
little booklets that are either readymade or homemade and promise various
things to the recipient. Like, "one free foot rub" or "one home-cooked meal" or,
ugh, those weird sex coupons (unless they don't specify who can cash them
in). If you are in a new, very new, relationship, or if your honey is overseas
serving in the military, then these coupon books are terrific. For everybody
else, they stink.
Just give somebody that foot rub, or make her a soy meat loaf, wrap it
up and tell her it's a Christmas present, but don't give anybody an IOU for
Christmas; it's just tacky.
Another gift-giving no-no is live gifts. Unless someone specifically asks
you for a fighting fish, an orchid or a shaman, then it's probably a bad idea to
give one. The holidays are already fraught with obligations-you don't need
to hand somebody another one. Even a yeast starter kit is too much life for me
to take care of, so I sure don't want a tomato plant.
Christmas is for the young as well as the young at heart, but if you have
any real kids on your list, then listen and listen good: money and toys, period.
No sweaters, no books, no bathrobes or religious objects. They have decades
of bad gifts coming to them; they don't need them this year from you.
It's all about good will. Why did Jimmy turn into a rabid Republican?
Because his dyke auntie gave him a pair of knitted slippers rather than $20
when he was 9.
In fact, this year I am adopting that same rule for all the adults on my list,
too: money and toys, period (hint, hint). ■

December 2007

I25

Politics VictoriaA. Brownworth

The Gifts that Keep on Giving
Trust me, everyone can afford to give something.

Readers of this column know a few things about me. They know I am a lesbian and a writer. They know that I have an incurable, progressive disease and
that I have fought cancer. They know that I am a Catholic and a leftist. They
know that I am an activist whose concerns range from sexual and gender politics to the politics of the planet. And they know that I love Christmas, and
that every year I do a little homiletic commentary about giving.
I have come to realize over the years that regardless of whether you identify as Christian, Jewish, Wiccan or nothing at all, whether you celebrate
Christmas, Hanukkah, the Solstice or nothing at all, this time of year still
brings out the spirit of giving in everyone.
It certainly brings it out in me.
I like giving. I like it a lot. I wish I had more to give, because then I could
do it more. I am limited by my income, but I still give. Back in September, Bill
Clinton published his book Giving: How Each of Us Can Change the World.
It's a book people need to read, but it's more for the rich than the not-sorich. The majority of philanthropists in the United States are actually people
like me, not people like Warren Buffett or Bill Gates. They are
people who don't have a lot to give but feel really strongly that
it's something they have to do.
Giving is a subjective thing: Each of us decides whether,
how, when, to whom and for what reason we will give.
When I was a child, cats followed me home. A lot. They
followed me because I loved them, and I wanted them to follow me so I could help them. They still follow me. I have rescued cats and kittens since I found my first feral cat, Daisy,
when I was 6. Now I have a nonprofit, no-kill shelter in my
home and have rescued and placed more than 800 cats in the
last decade and a half.
When I was a child, I was taught by the nuns to give my
recess money to help the "pagan babies'' in Africa who had
nothing. Now, through a charity, I support a couple of.kids in
Dominica, where the average annual income is $3,500. I have
put three girls through school who would otherwise not have
been able to go. I can still hear the nuns talking about the little
children with no food, no clothes, no books. I can imagine no
food and no clothes better than I can imagine no books. But I
get to give all three to these girls.
When I was a child, my mother's first cousin and her husband lived on a reservation out in South Dakota, where they
were missionaries who taught Sioux Indians and helped them
with the dire poverty they lived in, poverty that my relatives
shared. Now I donate to an American Indian group that also
puts kids through school and feeds them and helps them avoid
the pandemic alcoholism that has ruined the lives of so many.
I was homeless once, for a few months, in a city where I
was a stranger. People I didn't know helped me get through
that, so I always give money to homeless people. Now I have a
home and never stop being grateful for it because I know what
it's like not to have one.
I didn't get many gifts as a child. My family was poor by

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most standards, and my gifts tended to come secondhand, from thrift stores.
So when my sister had kids, I wanted to give them things. New things. Neat
things. Fun things. They are all in college now, so the gifts have changed, but
I still love giving them. At Christmas, my biggest shopping spree is buying
gifts for kids who don't have any. Because I know what it feels like to want
something new, that no.one else has ever owned before you.
The most important things I have gotten in my life have been books and
knowledge. So I teach. I give my college students books. I mentor students. I
try to pass on the little key that is learning, because it has made such a difference in my own life. And I hope they in turn will pass it on.
It's cold this time of year in Philadelphia, where I live. I worry about the
cats outside and the homeless people that line the benches on the Parkway in
town. Because homelessness is supposed to be, you know, over.
It's not just cold outside, I have found. The mood against giving in the
United States is on the rise. "Compassion fatigue'' is what the media calls it. I
call it-to borrow from Dickens who described it so well-"scrooginess:'

Compassion fatigue isjust an excuse for not giving when you can. Empathy
is an integral part of who we are as humans. It's actually the thing that sets us
apart as higher life forms: We understand we have a moral obligation to care
for those who need help or cannot care for themselves at all. We know we
need to give. But that doesn't mean we do.
I don't want to turn this into a rant against the Right in this countrywell, not much, anyway-but

they are the leaders of the compassion fatigue

movement. Back in September, George Bush decided it would be best if the
State Children's Health Insurance Plan plan were scrapped. SCHIP is the
federally funded, state-monitored insurance coverage plan for children, all the

That's the thing about giving. We really all have to participate because
some of us can do more than others, and some of us need more than others.
It costs only 10 dollars to buy a mosquito net (nothingbutnets.net) that will
save a child from malaria, the most common killer of children worldwide.
Each of us can handle giving, even if we think we can't. There's always
someone who needs something we have, and there's always something we can
give. Big or small, we can do it.
Some people like to invest; I like to divest. I envy Oprah because she can
do it on such a grand scale, and I can only do it one cat at a time, one child at
a time, one book or gift or meal at a time. But I can do it. And I never, ever

children, in the country. Bush thought, and his conservative cronies agreed,

feel bad about it or think I've made a mistake. That's the unique thing about

that it was sending the wrong message to give kids free health care. That parents wouldn't try to get health care for their kids if they knew they could get
it for free.

giving. It always feels right.
This holiday season, empty your pockets for someone else, whether it's
for mosquito nets, or books for kids at an underfunded local school, or meals

We're not talking cars here, we're talking health care.

for the homeless, or a coat for someone at a women's shelter. Get your friends

Take that, Tiny Tim.
Here's a small example, but one that has huge consequences. I have asth-

together to do the same thing. Tell them that instead of getting you a gift this
year, you want them to buy a food basket for a poor family, or donate to the

ma and have had it since I was a child. My sister has it. My nephew has it.
None of us died because we were all able to get medication that saved us

Marine Corps Reserves' Toys for Tots or find something that someone else
needs more than you need another CD or sweater or bracelet.

when we had life-threatening attacks. But if you don't have health care, then
you could die. As a kid, I was rushed to the hospital many times with attacks
so bad I turned blue. Why would anyone want someone's child to turn blue
and die of an asthma attack when there are inhalers and nebulizers that can
save those kids' lives?

It may or may not be cold where you are this time of year, but your
warmth can make someone else glow with joy for the holidays. Giving is
about the best thing you can do for yoursel£ And it's definitely the best thing
you can do for others. There is one catch, though: Once you start, you may
find you don't want to stop. ■

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December 2007

I27

ga once had the unflattering distinction of being one
rtiest cities in the United States, so I had no idea what
ect when I traveled there this summer. As it turns out,
has cleaned up its act. I was surprised to find not a

gies grown on local farms. After I noshed on mushroom ravioli

downtown, but one

I arrived in the evening, when temperatures

and homemade sorbet, I headed for the heart of the Riverfront
District and watched kids splashing around in the outdoor foun-

of the hippest cities in the South.
were cooler, and

decided to take a walk. I set out in the direction of the Tennessee
River, where a $120 million waterfront revitalization project is

tains. (I later learned that architects designed the fountains so
folks could kick off their shoes and ha~e fun in the water.)
Next up was the Tennessee Aquarium. To be honest, I was

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not expecting much. I went in with an if-you've-seen-one-aquar-

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the sun started to set, but there were still a lot of shopkeepers

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eager to offer me a bit of Southern charm. I spent hours brows-

aquarium has a huge touch tank where visitors can reach into

ci5
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ing through the shelves at Rock Point Books on Broad Street,

the water and touch the silken rays as they swim past. I was a

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checking out titles like Long Time Leaving: Dispatches from Up

little kid again, giggling and jumping back each time my hand

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South and Growing Up Gay in the South and talking to the sales

passed over the back of one of the big black rays. The aquarium

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clerk about upcoming readings.

was designed to mimic the feeling of flowing downriver, with

underway. The streets of downtown Chattanooga

were quiet as

Next, it was on to dinner at 212 Market, a local restaurant

28 j curve

able power and sends leftovers home in to-go boxes made of corn.
The menu changes with the seasons but is full of fruits and veg-

smog-filled metropolis with a deteriorating

Bluff View Art District
(above) offers a fun stroll,
while Chattanooga's
riverfront (right) is just
that dam pretty

Maggie and sisters

Market composts food waste, uses renew-

was made almost four decades ago,

since that pronouncement
Chattanooga

Owned by the Moses family-mother
Suzie and Sally-212

that is said to have launched the revitalization
Chattanooga.

of downtown

It opened in 1992 and was one of the first busi-

attitude-until

I saw the stingrays. The

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After the aquarium, I decided to check out more aquatic life

nesses to sign a lease downtown. Others soon followed, but still,

on a sunset kayaking trip along the Tennessee River. Outdoor

none are as popular as 212 Market.

Chattanooga, an organization founded to provide outdoor recre-

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ation and education about the natural resources in the area, runs
trips that include kayaking equipment and a guide. We paddled
several miles along the banks of the river, past herons and huge
waterfront homes, and watched the sun set over the water.
The outdoor activities were the main reason I decided to
visit Chattanooga. It's billed itself as a progressive city with lots
to see and do, especially for people who are into the environment and the outdoors.
The one activity that everyone raves about is hang gliding. Chattanooga, it seems, is home to the largest hang gliding
school in the U.S., Lookout Mountain Flight Park. For $139,
it's possible to get strapped to an instructor, pulled into the air
attached to an ultralight plane and released at 2,000 feet, using
the wind gusts to stay airborne. It was the scariest thing I've ever
done (and I've been skydiving), but it was so worth it. Plus, the
package includes pictures, so I have photographic evidence of
my stint as Adventure Girl.
Some of Chattanooga's must-see attractions were, admittedly, a little too kitschy for me: Ruby Falls has blazing neon
signs illustrating the names of various rock formations and a
light and sound show at its underground waterfall. Add to that
the $15 admission charge and it goes from being a natural wonder to an overpriced amusement park experience.
Rock City Gardens is a beautiful place for an afternoon
stroll (and the view of seven states from the top of Lookout
Mountain is stunning), but the section of the gardens called
Fairyland Canyons-which
depicts storybook scenes in an
underground cavern complete with garishly colored sculptures
and black lights-can, and should, be skipped.
There are a lot of attractions that are worth a gander, like
Reflection Riding Arboretum. It's a 300-acre park with narrow
scenic roads that weave through dense forests and huge meadows; it's home to more than a thousand different native plant
species. You can drive through the park, stopping to check out
the wildlife and admire the lush surroundings, or-and this was
a huge draw for me-you can park at the entrance and walk
through the arboretum. There are lots of secluded spots for a
picnic, or just to relax on a blanket. I even saw a woman doing
Tai Chi one afternoon.

Not into the outdoors? There is still a lot to do in Chattanooga.
The upscale Bluff View Art District on the outskirts of downtown Chattanooga has several galleries and restaurants, including one with an outdoor bocce ball court. The food and the art in
this neighborhood are excellent, and the prices reflect that.
I loved the hip North Shore, which is across the river from
downtown Chattanooga. A bridge that used to carry cars across
the Tennessee River was turned into a pedestrian walkway when
it became too old for vehicular traffic. It's a nice, albeit long, walk
across to the up-and-coming North Shore.
I'd heard that Clumpies has the best ice cream in the South
so I ordered a double scoop (I was on vacation and had just
walked across the pedestrian bridge; I deserved a treat), and
then ate it while I walked along the waterfront.
On the North Shore, the waterfront is called Coolidge
Park and has a much more laid-back vibe than downtown
Chattanooga. There were pickup soccer games, a few women
climbing a rock wall installed on one of the bridge supports, and
tons of people, myself included, lined up to ride the Coolidge
Park Carousel.
There are restaurants, art galleries and even a doggie boutique along Frazier Avenue, the main street on the North Shore.
The shops are less ritzy and the vibe much more liberal than in
the Bluff View Art District. It's quite common to see anti-Bush
paraphernalia and women-friendly books and art.
I spent most of the trip doing outdoor activities and the little time I had left I spent shopping and eating. I did ask around
about Chattanooga's nightlife and it seems like the options for
girls are slim, though a club called Images did come up.
Still, I have to admit that I was surprised at how progressive
Chattanooga was. Aside
from being oppressed
by heat, I didn't feel like
I was in the oppressive
"old" South. Though not
one person said, "Y'all
come back now;' I know
that I'll visit Chattanooga
again. ■

TENNESSEE HOTSPOTS

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Sure, the lyrics "Pardon me, boy, is
that the Chattanooga choo-choo?"
sound familiar, but it's the real
Chattanooga Choo-Choo that is not
to be missed. The former railroad
station turned hotel still has a lot of
its original charm. It opened in 1909
as a railroad station and was converted into an entertainment complex in 1973. The 24-acre site has
a model railroad museum, several
restaurants (including one housed in a
dining car and another where servers divide their time between serving
meals and standing onstage singing

for diners), and an authentic New
Orleans trolley that runs through the
grounds. One of the biggest draws to
the Choo-Choo is the unique accommodations. There are 48 restored
train cars that have been turned into
hotel rooms. Several of the cars have
queen-size beds and others also have
trundle beds. The complex is owned
by Holiday Inn Hotels and the train
cars make up just a small number of
rooms in the hotel, so be sure to ask
for the train car accommodations
when booking a room. The rail cars
are often reserved far in advance,

so book early if you have your heart
set on staying here (choochoo.com).
Be warned: The Choo-Choo bills
itself as the premier destination in
Chattanooga for families and offers
packages like Children's Fantasy
and Conductor's Special, which are
aimed at families with two adults and
two children. Although a reservations
agent assured me it's gay-friendly, I
saw mostly grandparents and small
(het) families when I was there. Who
knows, maybe that means it's a great
place for you and your baby mama to
take the wee ones.

December 2007

I29

an't
oman
own

By Kathy Beige
Photos By Danny Clinch

Melissa Etheridge's life has been an open book. We've watched her
unfold, unravel and unload since she came out in 1993. Perhaps
she's never been more visible than now, winning an Oscar for the
song "I Need to Wake Up;' hosting a Democratic presidential
candidates' debate on Logo, performing at the Live Earth concerts and, of course, becoming a spokesperson for breast cancer.
She and her wife, Tammy Lynn Michaels, have added twins to
their family (which already includes Bailey and Beckett, the kids
she had with ex Julie Cypher). To hear about her new album and
new outlook on life, we sat down between br~nch and putting
the twins down for a nap and talked about how the world looks
- through Melissa Etheridge's eyes.
You did a fantastic job with the HRC candidates' forum
on Logo.

That was really a challenge. It's not easy trying to represent our
community, which is probably the most diverse community
in the world.
Was there one candidate who impressed you?

I have to be honest. Going into it I was a big Hillary, Obama, even
Edwards [fan]. But I came out of that forum being a Dennis
Kucinich fan. I listened to him. I was completely taken by
what he had to say and how he said it. I started to do research
on him, and he's a courageous leader. He is the kind of leader

that this country needs. I mean, he has already brought up in
Congress the bill to form a Department of Peace. It's the kind
of groundbreaking stuff that people say, "Oh, that's ridiculous" and "He'll never get elected:' Why am I denying that to
myself? If I'm going to walk my talk, I'm going to say that
Dennis Kucinich is the man who represents the future that
I want to see.
You were pretty brave, the way you confronted HIiiary
Clinton. What were you hoping to hear from her?

The last couple of weeks of the Clinton presidency, they did a
fundraiser. I told him, "You know, I came out at your inauguration, and the years since ... it was difficult, but at least you
called us in and let us sit at the table:' Afterward, he gave me
a hug and with tears in his eyes, he said, "I wish I could have
done more:' I believed that he knew that he had sold out on
those issues-that he really caved in and morally he believed
inside of him that it was wrong. [With] Hillary, I wanted to
see a little bit of what I saw in [Bill] Clinton that night. I
wanted her to go, "You know what, it's not right. I want to do
more:' I wanted a little humanity in it. I just wish she would
just stand up and say, "Yes, this is what's right:' Because I
know that she knows it.
It's almost like you could see them saying, I don't support

gay mamage-wink,

wink, wink.

December 2007

I31

I mean, come on! Do we have to do that anymore in our country?
I don't think Lyndon Johnson said to Martin Luther King,
"You'vegot to wait for everybody to catch up with you. Were
not all ready for equal rights:'No, you don't do that. You make
the radical changes, you do what's right, because you know it
in your heart and in your soul. I'll get off my soapbox.
No, no, no! When are you running for office? That's what

I want to know.
When I raise my children and my albums are done. Give me 10
years!
You won an Oscar for singing "I Need to Wake Up" in the
movie An Inconvenient Truth. How did you get involved in
that project?

like a wave. I had to be still because it was too painful to watch
television. It was too painful to read. It hurt to listen to anything. Hours and days and weeks on end on chemotherapy,
I just laid there in my bed, quiet. Pretty soon, that little tape
in your brain, it just runs out, and theres nothing. When you
sit there and have nothing in your mind and it's quiet, you
can actually hear your soul. That was a life-changing moment.
It was brilliant. I touched the part that were all trying to get
to, that we all think is heaven or we think is nirvana. And all
it was, was just being still. I just am. And I'm beautiful and
amazing and powerful, and everyone is, and theres just love. It
just came to me. I started walking in it. At first I didn't read it
in any book or anything, but it just came to me.

"I am just a girlfrom Kansas.Just like everybody·else is a person
from somewhere.Everydaypeople ... can do great thingsand we
can change the world. I have no doubt ... that tomorrowif everyone ... thoughta littledifferently,the world would change."
Al Gore is a friend. He said to me, "Melissa, were going to make
a little documentary film, and I thought I'd like a little song to
go with it:' And I was like, "Yeah, sure, I'll write a little song:•
I had no idea if it would be more than something they'd show
in high schools. Actually seeing the slide show changed my
life, because it was like, time's up, I can't just fudge along anymore. I need to start understanding that every step I take and
everything I think about my world affects everybody else. So
my last tour was biodiesel. And now at home, I have biodiesel
in my garage. I am doing everything that I can and am learning every day how to live and make less of a footprint.
You've gotten a hug from a president, a call from a vice
president. Does that ever trip you out, the level of influence of the people you associate with?

You know why it doesn't trip tne out? It's because along this journey that I have been on, I am just a girl from Kansas. Just like
everybody else is a person from somewhere. And when I meet
these people, I realize that they're all just people from somewhere, doing their thing. I am honored to know them and
speak to them, especially the ones who have done great things
in the world, because I see them as people. I see that everyday
people, you and I, can do great things, and we can change the
world. I have no doubt in my mind that tomorrow, if everyone
just got up and thought a little differently, the world would
change. I know that.
Thoughts become actions, like in The Secret.
You know what I feel about The Secret? The Secret is like the
McDonald's of the movement. I saw The Secret after I had
come upon this wisdom. This wisdom I got when I was
forced to be still, when I went through chemotherapy. 1}:iat's
why I look at the breast cancer and chemotherapy as a gift,
because it stopped me. I was just like everybody else, running
on my treadmill, trying to get more money, trying to get more
famous, when I stopped and the whole world broke over me

32

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And then I started reading. I read everything from quantum physics and string theory to cosmology, to Plato, to Don Miguel
Ruiz, to the self-help things. I'm telling you, every single one
of them is talking about the same thing. And it'sjust the thing
that I found [as I was] laying there quiet in my room. Thought
becomes reality. All there is, is atoms and space.
You've won two Grammys, an Oscar, GLAAD media
awards, what's next? The Nobel Peace Prize?

Sure! Sign me up! You know what? I don't try for those things.
Those things are the best when they just happen, when I'm
doing what I love. Like for "I Need to Wake Up;' I loved the
project, the movie and Al. I was honored. I thought it was
very important to sing about waking up because I think that's
what we're doing right now. Were all becoming aware and
awake. It was just a great opportunity to put that message forward. I got this little shiny bare-assed man statue in my room.
[Laughs]And that's fun. But I certainly didn't do it for that.
Do you ever tire of being the poster child for the gay
community?

I am honored by it every day.There are some really great gay leaders now. People are coming out on a local level now, and that's
what makes the difference. And if me being all out and loud
helps with that, awesome! I was asked to sing at a NASCAR
race last week. Any time I'm asked to go into the heart of fear
of the people who fear gay people and think they don't know
gay people, that's when I want to step up now. I'm through
with the us and them thing. We are all just people. We need
to stop being afraid.
Do you ever wish you could just go back to playing the
bars again?

I_do wish that I could walk into a bar and just sing. I have this
little dream of walking into a blues bar and theres a band and
we do a couple of songs. That it could just be that. Tammy
and I will sometimes go out when were on the road and well

go into a bar and we know we'll have 30 minutes before peo,
ple call other people. We have a drink and pretend nobody
knows us, and then we run outside.
Thank you for the invitation to just sit and listen to your
new album. And I know you're calling this a concept
album, and I'm wondering why you're doing that now. Is
it because of the place where music has moved, where
people are just downloading songs?

Because that's not the art I'm making. Because, like you, I miss
running out and getting an album and knowing that the artist
is going to say something to me from the first song to the last.
And knowing that the artist is thinking about the world and
their soul and things that music transcends. I put that into this
album. I'm not an artist who just wants to put a song on the
radio. I'm done with that. They have marketed and researched
themselves into such a little bitty comer that all the music
sounds like everybody else. While I was on chemo and going
through everything, I said there is no reason on earth why I
shouldn't love everything I do and everything I make. Isn't that
what you want as a listener? That's what music's about.
This album does feel different to me than your other
albums, and one of the things that feels different is
how overtly political you are. The song that struck me
was "Imagine That," with the references to the anti-war
movement. Was there any fear in putting such an overtly
political song on an album?

Yeah. Let me tell you. When I started writing the songs, I liter,
ally sat down and made a deal with myself I said, if I fear
anything that I'm writing, I promise to go straight into it and
do it and finish it. That fear is exactly where I need to go. I
would start things and go,"No, I can't do that:' I did that with
"Imagine That;'"Kingdom of Heaven;' with "Threesome:'
"The Unexpected Rain" is so bluesy, it's sad. What were
you really trying to convey with that song?

The concept of the album starts with that dream of Hollywood,
of I'm going to California and I'm gonna be rich and famous
and I'm going to be gay. While I was looking professionally
for those things, of course I was personally looking for rela,
tions in the gay community. Actually, right down the street
from my aunt's house was the Pink Flamingo. It was a bar,
and I would go there and sit and wait for someone to talk to.
I met a couple someones. It was me trying out my gay legs.
I met a lot of women, played a lot of games and did a lot of
things that I'm not proud 0£ That song is talking about that,
the things that we do to each other, relationship,wise. It was
my coming clean. I wanted people to see that there are things
we have inside of us (and] if we just talk about it and get it
out, we can let it go.
The lesbians are going to be very upset. You're never goIng to have a threesome again?

I'll tell you the story. Tammy was pregnant. She was taking a nap
and I was poking around on my guitar. She woke up and she
said, "Oh my God, I just had a dream that you and I had a
threesome with Linda Evans from Dynasty:'And it really up,
set her. I had my guitar, so I (sang], "I don't want to have a
threesome:' I just joked around with her and I just started
writing it. And I finished it and went, "I can't put that on the

album. Uh oh, now I have to put that on the album:'
I've got a lot of friends who are having kids. I'm wondering why you chose an anonymous donor this time?

Having had the experience of my older children knowing their
biological father, it's really great. That was important at the
time. (In] my experience with my last relationship, that's what
made sense. They love him, they know that he's their biologi,
cal father, even though David (Crosby] doesn't parent them
at all. So when Tammy and I wanted to make babies-she
didn't know her father, really. He really wasn't a part of her
upbringing, so that needing to know who your father is just
didn't exist. We both knew that we wanted these babies, and
we are their parents, and we didn't want it to get any more
complicated than that.
What else do you want to tell me?

I love the gay community, and I especially love the lesbian com,
munity. They've always been there for me, through my ups
and downs. Love to all my sisters. ■

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5. PILATES POOL PARTY
Water offers one of the best excercise options so the portable Aquavee Pilates, a
resistance and swim workout for the pool,
makes the most of it. Instructional DVD
included. $120, aquaveeonline.com

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6. WORKOUT WHEN YOU'RE NOT EVEN
TRYING
Getting fit and fabulous is easy when you
wear MBT Physiological Footwear-shoes
that increase muscle activity in leg and core
muscles, and relieve pressure in the knee and
hip joints. $240 and up, swissmasaius.com

1. SAVE THE PLANET
Spend time with a pack on your back? Why not put all that sun exposure to good use? The revolutionary Solar-Powered Juice Bag allows
you to charge your cell phone, iPod, Blackberry or GPS. It stores the
energy it absorbs throughout the day, so there's no need to worry
about a lack of sunshine when you need to recharge. Plug in anytime,
day or night, and you're a self-sufficient machine. $270, gaiam.com
2. IDIOT-PROOF CAMPING
This Portable Gas Stove couldn't be easier to use. It comes in a
lightweight briefcase-size carrying case and its one-touch auto
ignition instantly brings the fire to life. It's safe and easy, and
there's no need to worry about your matches blowing out or
getting wet. $30, firebox.com
3. MOVE OVER CROCS
Splash through puddles, brave city streets, or take
a hike in LL. Bean's waterproof women's Storm
Chaser Clogs. $49, llbean.com
4. TAKE IT WITH YOU
The organized pockets, pouches and compartments of the Shockwave Book Pack
give angsty teens quick and easy access to
whatever it is they're carrying these days.
$69, llbean.com

36

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7. TOOL TIME
You'd be lost without a flashlight, but think
of everything else you need to camp. Enter
the Adventure Pius's 7-tools-in-1 , with a
thermometer, mirror, magnifier and match
storage compartment. $24, gaiam.com

0
8. A WET DREAM
OF A TENT
Eureka's N!ergy 1310 Tent
has cigarette lighter type
outlets inside (powered
by the E!Power Pak) that
let you plug in everything
a girl could need in the
woods from lights and
fans to cell phones, iPods
and portable DVD pl~yers.
Combine it with the Casper
15° Women's Mummy Sleeping
Bag (try Cimarron or Copper River) and the
N!ergy Pillow (which fits in the Casper's
pillow pocket) and features two speakers so
you can play movies or your iPod in stereo.
Why go home? $25-$290, eurekatent.com
9. NOT PICTURED: TRAVEL DOOHICKEY
The funky sleek 4-in-1 Nomad Travel Silverware has a sturdy fork/knife/spoon/bottle
opener that folds into one and hangs from a
cool lanyard. $20, uncommongoods.com

10. DYKESVILLE HARDWARE MESSENGER BAG
Be bold as a highlighter while alluding to what's inside your bag
of "tools." The perfect alternative to the boring old briefcase.
$23, dyketees.com
11. CLUTCHING YOUR STUFF
These Femme Sud purses put a retro spin on the modern-day
woman's clutch. Our fave? The Limited Edition red lambskin Ex
Libris Yearbook, which looks remarkably like the real thing, and
the First Place Grand Prix Wristlet. $225 and up, femmesud.com

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12. BETTE BAGGAGE
The Lements Travel Bag is hot, black is always
in and the Love and Pride's L Word Collection
screams sophisticated style worthy of Ms.
Porter and her peeps. $175, loveandpride.com
13. BREAST CANCER AWARENESS
Krina's Isadora Bag is a tasteful blush color
that's not only as sexy as satin panties, but
helps support breast cancer research. $360,
krinabag.com

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15. COWGIRL CHOCOLATES
Owned and operated by women, Cowgirl Chocolates offers Somethin' Fancy Caramel Corn (think Pumpkin Spice
or Chipotle Vanilla), Hot Hazelnut Toffee or Spicy Caramel
Nut Clusters. $11 and up, cowgirlchocolates.com

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14. OLIVE JUICE
With exotic flavor combos like Maison Verlet's Coffee &
Black Olive Tapenade, a Discovery Set of exotic oils (White
truffle? Chile?) and Mint Olive Oil, O&Co. has it all for the
gourmand on your list. $12 and up, oliviersandco.com

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16. ESCAPE TO ITALY AT HOME
Missing that Italian flair? Make your own gelato using fresh organic
ingredients with this supreme Villa Dolce Gelato Maker. $110,
villadolcegelato.com
17. FOLLOW THE RABBIT
Zen Rabbit Gratitude Cookies's buttery, sweet, thin, crunchy cookies will show your coworkers how much you appreciate them. $22,
zenrabbitcookies.com
18. BLOOMING CUP OF HEAVEN
The Teaposy Garden Gift Set includes a 16-ounce glass teapot with
loose-leaf tea filter, a pair of glass teacups and a medley box of six
different gourmet teas. $59, wishingfish.com
19. PURSE-SIZE PROTECTION
Both compact and portable, the Salter Nutri-Weigh Travel Scale can
record your daily food intake on the go for up to seven days. This
sleek Iii' computer can actually calculate the nutritional values like
calories, protein, carbs, cholesterol and more. $60, int.com
20. PERK YOURSELF UP
The innovative Capresso Burr Grinder minimizes
static, prevents clogging and ensures that no
ground coffee remains inside the grinder. It has 17
different settings and a timer. $50, capresso.com

38

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21. ICE CREAM BY THE FIREPLACE?
Sure you don't want ice cream
samples in your stockings, but
these delicious ice cream samplers
are perfect hostess gifts. $3 and up,
sheerbliss.com

22. NOT PICTURED: VEGAN
DONE RIGHT
Want a vegan dessert but frightened by
rumors of cardboard-textured disgustingness?
Fear no more. Allison's Gourmet has perfected
the art of the delicious, cruelty-free cookie.
Try the cookie or brownie of the month club,
or both, because you can. $32 per month,
allisongourmet.com

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23. FORGET ABOUT MUDFLAPS
Eat with a sexy girl every night with these
Naked Lunch Pop Ink plates that will
delight your dinner guests long after they've
licked them clean. $14, popink.com

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24. THE ELEPHANT IN THE BARROOM
Serve up some fun from this retro remake of a classic, the Liquor Elephant,
$25, fuzzydude.com
25. CAN YOU SMELL WHAT I SMELL?
Get into the season with Aroma Cones, richlyscented wax-dipped natural pinecones that
bring the beauty of the forest home with scents
like clove and sage. $8 and up, lightstone.com

26. WHO DOESN'T LOVE THE MONKEY?
Fashion accessories from Paul Frank come in
sleek or quirky looks. We adore (above, left to
right) the Dazzle the Unicorn watch, sophisticated
Freedom of Choice watch, Lulu watch in wood
or pink, and the Fistful of Dollars sunglasses (in
chocolate stripe). $65 and up, paulfrank.com
27. DOGGIE STYLE BABY
Show her you're smitten with a
ChaChi Loves Esperanza Hoodie
or a cute tee like (not pictured)
Chachi in Love or Skurvy Rainbow
$26 and up, paulfrank.com
28. TIE ME UP, TIE ME DOWN
OK, this bike babe isn't sporting
Paul Frank but we love the Tomcat's Lizzie Borden Tie (Rigged's
Outlaw Shirt on pg. 48). $10, tomcatthreads.com

29. AHOY, WENCHES!
Sail around on the super hot Pirate Scurvy
Cruiser bike with its gloss black finish, basket
and "I love my bike" bell. If your girl is this
cute, even better. $330, nirve.com

paulfrankworship

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30. TRES CHIC POOCHIE
Your dog will be as fabulous as you with Fab Dog toys,
inspired by chic status symbols like the classic tennis
bracelet and laptop. $13 and up, fabdog.com
31. IT'S BEGIN.NING TO TASTE A LOT LIKE
CHRISTMAS
Cloud Star's Buddy Biscuits gingerbread-flavored dog
treats are all-natural, don't contain salt, sugar, dairy or artificial flavors or colors. Cloud Star also donates a portion of
its proceeds to animal shelters. $6, cloudstar.com

32. BASH THAT BUSH
Now your kitties or doggies can take a bite out of Bush as
they chew on George the Lame Duck catnip-stuffed duck
or squeaky dog toy. $6 and up, moodypet.com
33. MOM MAINTENANCE
Cleaning can be fashionable with these extra chic Red
Cherries Gloveables. $14, wishingfish.com
34. GIFT BOX TO GO
Surprise a Pet allows you to create a variety of gift packages containing combinations of tasty treats like Pawbreakers cat candy, fun toys and pet-pampering spa items.
$30 and up, surpriseapet.~om

35. AFFIRMATION IN FLEECE
Affirrnawraps are fleece blanl<ets with affirmations
(strength, courage and more) printed on them. They
come in adult and baby sizes too, but our fave is this
cute pet blanket. $30, affirrnagy.com
36. PUCCI FOR POOCHIES
While chewing on Dancing Dog's adorable high-heel
and purse-shaped toys, your pup can have a taste of
fashion and leave your costly goods untouched. $6,
petco.com
37. PURFECTLY SWEET COMBOS
Match your doggy's leash and collar with hip color
coordinated paisley, polka dot or striped choices from
chic Owen + Olivia. $26 and up, owenandolivia.com

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39. SPIRITUAL SKIN
Health and beauty magnate Akhassa's new Varada Hand Therapy
ritual is inspired by the Varada mudra-the Buddhist hand position
signifying charity and compassion. The lovely fragrance and packaging make it a perfect gift set. $16 and up, akhassausa.com
38. STYLISH TODDLERS
Made by moms for moms, Right Bank
Babies aims to make your kids' clothes
last. Reversible, comfortable and fashionable, we love the paisley-printed
dresses and tattoo-patterned pants.
$53 and up, rightbankbabies.com

40. GET BALANCED, BABY
The rainbow, or "wheel" of the seven chakras, originating thousands
of years ago in the ancient Hindu system of healing, represents
aspects of consciousness from wisdom and self-expression to love
and sexuality. Abrione's new Chakra Masques (made with green tea,
pomegranate and more) help to stabilize chakras that are not balanced. $30 for set, vbcosmetics.com
41. A PERFECT HOSTESS GIFT
If you want to give your host a little of everything, this Chicks Mix
collection includes a candle, shower gel, lip balm, tea, chocolates,
trinkets and cards with words of wisdom. $25, lightmyfiregifts.com

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49. ULTIMATE GREEN ODOR EATER
Rub this Stainless Steel Soap between your hands and find
that the garlic smell on your paws goes away. $10, uncommongoods.com
42. FERRIS WHEEL BIRDFEEDER
Hummingbirds will delight in this triple Red Ferris Wheel
Birdfeeder. $55, uncommongoods.com

50. SAVE THE PLANET, SAVE THE DUCT TAPE
Have fun creating a one-of-a-kind wallet from this Do-ItYourself Duct Tape Kit. $20, myductbills.com

43. THE ULTIMATE RECYCLED LAMP
New Orleans-based Unique Products creatively fashioned
this Green Gain Pig Laundry Lamp from empty bottles of
detergent and a lot of chutzpah. They're sure to brighten up
any room with color and humor. $30, letsgetup.com

51. CLEAN BUT GREEN
The Wonderwash is a pressure compact washing machine that uses 90 percent less detergent and water than
conventional models. Portable and compact, the Wonderwash and the Countertop Spin Dryer are perfect for
apartment living, RV dwellers, students or anyone who
wants an environmentally friendly washer. $43 and up,
laundry-alternative.com

44. RENEWABLE RESOURCE
New Balance's CoCoNa Run Jacket is made of coconut shell
and natural fibers, which combat UV rays and keep you warm,
dry and chafe-free. $70, coconafabrics.com
45. RECYLCED HURRICANE WEAR
New Orleanians have little love for FEMA but you've got
to dig their nearly indestructible tarps, which have been
turned bags. $30, letsgetup.com
46. BILLS, BILLS, BILLS
Made from ecofriendly material, the sleek Tope Version
3 Wallet-which is also vegan, enviro-friendly and animal
free-sports super cool graphics like this landscape design,
which looks like it belongs on an old k.d. lang album cover.
$48, dbclay.com
47. WIPE YOUR FEET
These monkeys offer guests a playful reminder to speak no
evil with the Monkey See doormat. As with all Uncommon
Goods purchases, partial proceeds will benefit a charity.
$30, uncommongoods.com
48. CREDIT GRANTED
These whimsicle Take Charge earrings are made of reclaimed
credit cards and sterling silver. $12, replayground.com

56. FAMILY GUY FREAl<IN' PARTY COLLECTION
The most complete collection of Family Guy episodes
you could ever purchase, includes five seasons. Make it a
Family Guy game night with the ping pong or poker sets,
which are both included along with the DVD set. Store
your favorite show in the collectible carrying case for
organized season marathons. $105, fox.com
57. HELLO LEELA
Who can save the world from alien Internet scammers?
The first Futurama movie, Bender's Big Score, is set to
appease fans who are still hating on Fox. The secret to
time travel is tattooed on Fry's ass and one-eyed, shouldbe-a-lesbian Leela finds true love. $20, fox.com
58. SPIDER PIG, SPIDER PIG
Doh! ... The Simpsons are back with a movie. Sure to be
a classic, the DVD packs in special features: comments,
deleted scenes, and funny stuff like "Homer's Monologue
on the Tonight Show" and "The Simpsons Judge American Idol." $30, fox.com
59. DOING TIME THE LESBIAN WAY
Hothead Paison is back, baby. At least in calendar form.
$20, hotheadpaison.com

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60. CINEMA LOVERS UNITE
Decorate your wall with the kinky 2008 Dykesploitation wall calendar, which features a different vintage film
poster each month. $19, dykesploitation.com
61. WE LOVE NEW YORK (GIRLS)
Twelve queer Brooklyn girls pose at Coney Island in swimsuits made by Brooklyn designers in the I Heart Brooklyn
Girls calendar, which revisions traditional pin-up through a
lezzie lens. $15, iheartbrooklyngirls.com

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62. WE LOVE HELEN MIRREN
Own the conclusion of the hit crime drama,
Prime Suspect 7: The Final Act, in which
Oscar-winner Helen Mirren is soon-to-retire
Detective Superintendent Jane Tennison who
must solve the mystery of missing 14-year-old
Sallie Sturdy. $30, acornmedia.com
63. SLEUTHING HOUSEWIFE
Patricia Routledge headlines this cool BBC
mystery series Hetty Wainthropp Investigates: The
Complete Collection. With a teenage apprentice in
tow, Hetty gets to the bottom of the investigation
with justice and empathy. $150, acornmedia.com
64. SECOND ROUND OF BIG LOVE
Who outed America's favorite polygamists in the
gay-produced Big Love? Who knows, but the second
season of this fictional family's struggle to stay mum
and save face in Salt Lake City is a perfect gift for
the closeted Love addict in your life. $60, hbo.com
65. MYSTERIOUS WOMAN WRITER
Let the suspense thrill you with set 2 of The Ruth
Rendell Mysteries. Dubbed the Queen of Crime,
Rendell is one of the most acclaimed modern crime
writers-female or male. $50, acornmedia.com

December 2007

I43

66. GET YOUR SLING ON, GIRLS
Ice it up with Fuzzydude.com's Sparkly Gun and Handcuff
necklaces, Sling Cherries pin and Batty Pink broach. $13
and up, fuzzydude.com
67. PAINTED PIZAZZ
These two boy shirts from SAAZ Designs feature their
paint spill look and are embroidered around the cuffs and
hems. $70, saazdesigns.com
68. A BRACELET SHANE WOULD LOVE
This beautiful Bone Cuff bracelet from Love and Pride's
L Word Collection is edgy enough for Shane and pretty
enough for Jenny. $495, loveandpride.com
69. HEART ON YOUR SLEEVE (ER, BELT)
Phoenix's queer clothier Tomcat's new Corazon Belt
Buckle is a must for any babe. $17, tomcatthreads.com
70. MADE BY LESBIANS FOR LESBIANS
Debri Field is an online store for "individuals who enjoy
mixing fashion, politics, sexuality and plain old silliness."
Well, that's us to a t(ee). Our faves are the Mudflap Girl,
Pirate Ponytail, Gender and especially the Mrs. DeGeneres
T-shirts. Even better: Wooden Earrings in Kitty or Deer
prints. $10 and up, debrifield.com
71. GIDDYUP PARTNERS
Liz Rosino, owner, operator, designer and seamstress
extraordinaire behind LuckyKat, is our new guru. Our
editor lost her mind over this sexy Western Skull Dress
in lightweight black twill with skull bandana print. Get the
tattoo look without the needles. $70, luckykat.net

44

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72. 2Q2BEAT
No tofu was harmed in the making of this "Soy Friendly" shirt.
Asian-inspired cartoons are just
as sweet and silly as your gal pal.
$22, spicybrown.com
73. WHERE YOU FROM?
You'll start the conversation
before it even begins with these
region-repping tees embalzoned with East Coast, Deep
South, Midwest and more. San
Francisco's Citizen Body makes
these tees for cuties all over the
country. $23, citizenbody.com
74. THE OUT-LAW TUXEDO SHIRT
Fancy business in front, party in the back, kinda like a
mullet. So cute, Rigged Out/Fitters Outlaw Pistols Tuxedo
Shirt will have you fighting off dyke admirers in droves.
Not enough? Get her Rigged's Customizable Tuxedo Shirt
with your own words and tattoo-inspired images. $45,
riggedoutfit.com

(/)
75. NO BAG NECESSARY
All you really need for a night out (cash
and ID) will fit in this sexy leather cuff
that doubles as a wallet. This lesbiandesigned wrist wallet is a Sheryl Crow
fave. $88, wilmawor1d.com
76. LISTENING IN STYLE
You Go Gir1iPod Black Jeweled Ear
Loops work with any digital music
source-CD players, iPod, even an
old school cassette player-and come
decked with pink Austrian crystals.
Other styles and colors available. $20,
u-go-g.com
77. KEEP YOUR CRITTERS CLOSE
The popular furry Fun Friends now
offers Plush iPod Covers in tweenfriendly characters like hippo,
penguin, koala and more. $10,
funfriends.com
78. PLAY ANYTIME!
Tote your childhood game faves on
your grown-up keys. These nostalgic
toys aren't just for looks, you can
really play on them! Scrabble, Etcha-Scetch, Rubix Cube, Clue, even
Operation! Who knew you could stuff
a whole board game into a stocking?
Now you can with Ultimate Key Chains
picks. $3-$6, ultimatekeychains.com

I

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e,
79. METAL PEN-WRITING IN METAL
No ink, no smudging, no sharpening
with this crazy pen made of a metal
alloy that leaves a mark on most types
of paper. Fashioned like the styluses
of Leonardo da Vinci, Durer and Rembrandt, this pen won't wear down.
$30, grand-illusions.com
80. STICK IT TO HIM
Be a voodoo seamstress with this
awesome "Stick
it to Bush" pin
cushion. $7, gerberadesigns.com.
81. DANCEDANCE REVOLUTION
An Asian-centric stocking stuffer
we adore: Momjii (our fave is called
dancedancedance). Hidden inside every
doll is a tiny folded card for your own
special message. $15, firebox.com
82. HEEL, GIRL
Keep your bedroom door open with
this sexy Foot in the Door stopper.
$15, firebox.com

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83. DE-STRESS YO'SELF
Featuring Deepak Chopra, Andrew Weil and Dean Ornish,
Healing Rhythms's Biofeedback Training Program has
over 30 mind-body exercises to train your body to activate, balance, release and recover for optimal health.
$300, wilddivine.com
84. HOOK IT UP, DJ
Already have a sweet sound system, but need a way
to hook up your iPod? The iPort FS-2 allows you
to attach your iPod to your TV to play videos, and
computer or stereo speakers to play music. Have your
friends bring over their iPods with playlists and take
turns DJ-ing all night. $150, iportmusic.com
85. A TECHNOLOGICAL GENIUS
Samsung's Q1 Ultra mobile PC with mini 7-inch
screen is smaller than a laptop, bigger than a PDA.
It's faster and holds more memory than a PDA, has
full PC functionality, allows access to Bluetooth,
e-mail and Internet, and has a webcam. $1155 and
up, samsung.com
86. SNAP-HAPPY
What's not to love about the new Camera Exilim EX
588ORD? A piece of art in itself, highly intuitive and light
as a feather, this camera is smaller than a video iPod, and
can make YouTube ready videos, it's already formatted.
You're your favorite mode of creative expression. $280
and up, exilim.casio.com
87. CHEAP SKATE
Carpeting is no fun because you can't slide on it! The
tragedy of carpeted floors can be overcome with Fun
Slides, carpet skates made to be worn over athletic
shoes for friction resistance fun. Available in blue, green,
silver, red, purple and hot pink. $20, funslides.com
88. V-CAST MOBILE T-PHONE BY VERIZON
Remember when they added cameras, Bluetooth and
MP3s to cell phones and you thought it couldn't get any
better? Well, it has. The LGVX9400 not only does all those
things, but it also gets TV. No downloading or anything.
And it has a large color display, so you may never watch
your home set again. (price varies, lgusa.com)

46

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89. TINY AND FAST
Check out the smallest scanner ever! The size of a
pen (8 inches), the portable Docupen Scanner Pen
model Color RC 800, scans an entire page of text and
graphics in just four seconds. It stores up to 100 pages
in 2 megabites of flash memory, only weighs 2 ounces
and has rechargeable batteries. $300, planon.com
90. WHO NEEDS A PORTABLE DVD PLAYER
The Zen Vision multimedia center will let you view photos, music, TV and videos. You can also listen to the radio, record your voice, and get organized with a personal
calendar. $300, us.creative.com
91. IT'S NOT ALL ABOUT APPLE
In an age of feigned enlightenment, even your MP3
player can be Zen. Maybe the bright happy colors of the
Zen Stone Plus MP3 player will awaken you. If not, this
MP3 player will still set you apart from the crowd. $70,
us.creative.com

Tasty Treats
A little sweet, a little spice, homemade food gifts are really nice.

By Vanessa Barrington
Just when you think you can relax and enjoy the holidays, another gift~giving
event pops up. If you hate the thought of hitting the stores in a desperate
search for the one thing that will perfectly express your regard for your new
lover's sister or the person whose name you drew at the office, you might
consider going the DIY route. Spending a little time in the kitchen is a good
way to savor the moment, save money and inject a little meaning into what
can be a soulless cacophony of commerce. After all, everyone loves food and
food gifts are so easily repurposed (never say re~gifted). Your recipient may
take your gift to a party and share it with people you don't know. But does it
matter? Your spirit of generosity just keeps radiating outward.
Spending your time and energy instead of dollars makes homemade gifts
rewarding in a way that those hastily purchased generic gifts can never be.
Spread the joy by turning the gift making into an event. Invite friends over,
serve drinks and snacks and make big batches of jam, chutney, spiced vinegar,

Nutty Cranberry Maple Granola

Sweet and Spicy Pecans

Ingredients

Ingredients

Ingredients

1 pound granulated white sugar
2 vanilla beans

2 cups kamut (or other cereal grain) flakes
2 cups rolled oats
1/2 cup sesame seeds
1 cup sunflower seeds
1/2 cup sliced almonds
1 cup dried cranberries
1/2 cup mild vegetable oil
1/2 cup maple syrup
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

6 tablespoons butter (plus more to butter
baking sheets)
6 tablespoons water
11/4 cups packed brown sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
3 teaspoons ground ginger
1 1/2 teaspoons ground cayenne
1 1/2 teaspoons ground cardamom
3/4 teaspoon nutmeg
6 cups shelled pecan halves

Fair warning: You can't make this overnight.
It takes two weeks for the vanilla to flavor
the sugar.

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Put the sugar in a large bowl. With a sharp
paring knife, cut the vanilla beans open
from end to end, without cutting all the
way through. Using the knife, scrape the
vanilla seeds into the sugar, mixing with
your hands and using your fingertips to
distribute the vanilla
seeds evenly. Add the
pods to the sugar and
transfer to a large jar.
Shake every couple of
days for two weeks to
give the vanilla time to
thoroughly perfume the
sugar. Remove the pods and add them to
another pound of sugar for your own use.
They will keep on flavoring the sugar for
months. You can even keep adding sugar
as you use it up. Package it up in little jars
with handmade hangtags printed with usage suggestions like "great on French toast
and pancakes" or "extra sweet in coffee
and cocoa."

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hefty mugs.
The three recipes below are a great place to start. If the thought of
sterilizing jars and processing them in .water makes you want to run for
the nearest mall, fear not. Each of these recipes is shelf~stable, requires
no preserving and will last at least a few weeks when stored properly.

Vanilla Sugar

(Makes 1 pound)

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cookies, candy or any of the recipes below.
One visit to the store and a few hours in the kitchen and you can have
a nice stockpile of gifts when you need to give one unexpectedly. You might
even enjoy yourself so much that you'll choose to overlook the commercial
side of the holidays and make gifts for everyone on your list.
Even if your craftiness doesn't extend to the culinary arts, you can still
give wonderful gifts of food. Pour your creativity into the packaging. Pair
up a nice jar of jam with muffin mix and package them both up with muffin
tins. Combine hot chocolate mix with gourmet marshmallows and a set of

For a variation, add cinnamon, nutmeg or
other spices. Stores indefinitely.

(Makes about 8 cups)

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. In a
small saucepan, over medium-low heat,
warm the oil, maple syrup, and vanilla
extract. Do not boil. In a large bowl,
combine the kamut flakes, oats, sesame
seeds, sunflower seeds, almonds and
cranberries. Toss to mix.
Pour the maple syrup
mixture over the dry
ingredients and toss until
they're evenly and lightly
coated.
Transfer the mixture to a
large baking sheet and
spread out evenly. Bake
for 15 to 20 minutes. Stop
halfway through and stir the ingredients so
they brown evenly. Let them cool completely in the pan. Pack granola up in a
decorative bag and tie it with a ribbon, or
decorate little paper bags with stamps or
seasonal ephemera. Store in an airtight
container for up to two weeks.

(Makes 6 cups)
Preheat the oven to
350 degrees F. Lightly
butter two baking
sheets.
In a large skillet over
medium heat, melt the
butter. Add the water, brown sugar, salt,
ginger, cayenne, cardamom, and nutmeg.
With a wooden spoon, stir just until the
sugar dissolves. Add the nuts to the sugar
mixture and cook, stirring, until the nuts
are coated, about five minutes. Transfer to
the buttered baking sheets, spreading the
nuts out in a single layer and dividing them
evenly between the two sheets. Bake for
about 10 minutes, until golden and crisp.
Let cool in the pan.
Perfect for snacking or adding to salads.
Package up in little cellophane bags tied
with a ribbon. Store in an airtight container
for up to two weeks.

DIV Holiday Gifts
Put those old CDs and DVDs to work again.

Text and photos by Margaret Coble
Whether you're the crafty type or not, it's always fun
to give handmade holiday presents to your friends and
family. And recycling things that would otherwise end up
in the landfill is always a good idea. So why not combine
these two concepts and make some easily customizable
holiday ornaments out of all the old CDs sitting around
your home? Scratched-up home-burns, dead DVDs and
those free promotional CDs that come in the mail are
perfect for this project.

YOU WILL NEED:
CDs/DVDs

drill with 3/16-inch bit
fine grit sand paper
respirator
gray primer enamel spray paint
enamel spray paint in other colors
stencil on cardstock or acetate
X-acto knife
spray adhesive (optional)
glitter
spray-on clear gloss
silver elastic cord
scissors

1. Prep your CD by first wiping off any dirt or grease that might be on it.
Next, use a drill with a small bit (preferably 3/16,inch), to drill a hole near
the edge of each ornament you intend to make. (You'll be looping some
elastic cord through it later, to hang it by.) Don't get too close to the edge or
the CD might crack; about 1/8,inch from the edge is good. If you don't get
a good, clean hole, use a little sandpaper to sand around the edges to make
it smooth.
2. Next, set yourself up somewhere where you can spray,paint, preferably
somewhere with good ventilation, like outdoors, in a garage or at least
somewhere with an exhaust fan. Prep a surface to paint on by putting down
newspapers, cardboard or something else to keep the paint off of everything.
Wear clothes you don't mind getting paint on, and use latex gloves if you
don't want paint on your hands. And always use a respirator over your face,
if possible. Paint fumes are nothing to fool around with.
The first step is to spray the disc with some gray enamel primer to cover
up any writing or printing that might be on the face of the CD, and to make
a better surface for the paint to adhere to. Try to keep the spray can at least
6 inches away from the CD's surface, and keep your hand moving back and
forth, laying down light layers of paint until you have full coverage or else
you might end up with big globs of paint that will drip and be uneven.
3. Let the primer dry thoroughly, and repeat if you can still anything through
it. Depending on the weather where you are and the environment you are
working in, it might take a few minutes or up to a few hours for the primer
to dry. Once you' re sure it is thoroughly dry, do the other side of the disc
and let it dry.
Now would be a good time to get your stencil ready. If you can draw or
are able to manipulate images in a graphics program on your computer, just
turn your favorite object or picture into a silhouette, and fit it into a 5,inch
circle. It might take some trial and error, but with some patience, you can
create an infinite number of designs, from simple geometric shapes to ani,
mals to symbols or anything, really!

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4. If you're not confident in your drawing skills or your aptitude for computer graphics,
then you can download my template for the bird stencil shown here on cuRvE's Web site
and print it out on cardstock or acetate (a transparency sheet), and then carefully cut it
out with an X,acto knife. I've added a few little wavy lines to give the bird some motion.

5. Back to the CDs. Once both sides are dry, spray on a layer of color, whichever you
choose as your background color. For mine, I'm choosing engine red. Remember to spray
lightly, back and forth, building layers until you have complete coverage. While the paint
is still wet, carefully sprinkle a small amount of glitter onto the disc, preferably in a con,
trasting color. This way, when the paint dries, it will glue the glitter onto the surface of
the disc.

6. When your CD is thoroughly dry, take your stencil and line it up with the disc. This
can be tricky if it's not on acetate (which is see,through), but you can get the placement
right by using your fingers to feel the edges of the disc through the sheet of paper. A very
light dusting of spray adhesive is optional here, on the back of the stencil. It will help keep
the stencil adhered to the disc and give you a better print from the spray paint. But if you
use too much, it might also make the stencil stick to the disc, causing paint or glitter to
come off when you remove the stencil. So use it sparingly if you have to, just enough to
barely tack the stencil down. (Another reason why it's very important for all the coats of
paint to be absolutely dry before you print the stencil.)
7. Once the stencil is in place, use a contrasting color of spray paint to spray on your
design. I've choosen a bright yellow.When you're sure you've got sufficient coverage on all
the open areas of the stencil, lift the stencil up off the disc carefully, without touching it
to the wet paint. Again, it might tak some trial and error to get it right, but once you do,
you'll be able to replicate the process easily.
While the paint is still wet, you can again sprinkle on some more glitter. Some of the
glitter from the first layer will have been covered with paint, so I usually go for the second
layer; it adds texture.

8. Let it dry thoroughly. Repeat the process on the other side if you want a two,sided
ornament. If you only want a one,sided ornament, you can leave the back painted with
just the background color. Or you can skip that step entirely and leave the shiny side of
the disc blank, as the back, if it's not too scratched up.
When the paint is thoroughly dry, use clear gloss for a top coat, which will help seal
the glitter again. Spray a very thin layer, or it might get cloudy. Just enough to give it a
shine!
When it's all completely dry, it's time to thread the elastic cord through the hole for
hanging. You can use other materials to hang it by-ribbon, yarn, thread, twine, mono,
filament, etc. I like silver elastic cord; it's cheap, easily found at any. fabric store, and is
festive. I cut about an 8,inch piece and make a slipknot through the hole, tying off the
other end.
And voila! A highly personal, handmade, recycled holiday ornament is yours. Make them
for yout'self or your friends and family. Change up the colors, the glitter, or the designs for
an infinite variety of possibilities. Hang the ornaments on your tree, on the wall, or from
the ceiling, or string several of them together for a mobile. Happy holiday recycling!

To see more examplesof Mags' ornamentdesigns,or to purchasesome of her own handmade
recycledornamentsor her othercraftywares,visit her Web site, artbymags.com.
December 2007

I49

Behind·the Scenes of

an

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Television's queerest gothic soap opera
offers a lesbian threesome never before
seen on TV. By Jennifer Corday

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The
rd season of Dante's Cove has a mysterious and vibrant lesbian buzz,
with w characters, new magic spells and some hot lesbian sex scenes that
will
ely pique your interest. here! Networks, home to the drama series, is
now lulablethrough subscription in over 40 million homes across the United
States and, according to Senior Vice President of Original Programming
Meredith Kadlec, the third season of Dante's Cove will be groundbreaking."We
have some great new additions to the cast and we have some really great writers
and actors. I think this is our signature series:•
Here! is battling Logo to be the flagship of gay TV and is well ahead of
the industry in creating gay-themed shows for prime time. Even better: Dante's
Cove is the first ever prime-time show starring three out lesbian actors playing
three out lesbian characters, programmed by-you got it-a lesbian executive.
"How great that our community has gotten to a place where a lesbian
producer is talking to lesbian actors about what to do in a lesbian scene for
lesbian viewers;' says Kadlec.
The series stars out actors Michelle Wolff, Jill Bennett and Jenny Shimizu
in a love triangle, which required some interesting casting. Wolff plays Brit,
the tall, muscular scuba buff (who looks hot in a bathing suit, I must add),
whose role will be much more developed this season. 'Tm not the bartender
anymore;' Wolff explains. "I guess she decided to give that up:' Brit is now a
full-time oceanographer, with a new girlfriend played by model-turned-actress
Shimizu. The two butch women form a sexy and unique couple not commonly
represented on screen.
"Both of us are, and play, androgynous women;' says Wolff. "I thought it
was a really interesting choice to go with that. In terms of film and TV, you
rarely see two butch women together:'
Shimizu agrees. "From an actor's point of view I thought it was a good
choice to have two really strong characters coming together. We're both independent and secure in our own sexuality. You rarely see that represented on
TV: Realistically, I think a lot of lesbians, in L.A. and New York at least, are
attracted to similar styles:•
Shimizu plays Elena, an antique dealer vacationing at Dante's Cove, only
to fall for the sexy diver. "I wasn't familiar with the show so I met Michelle
(Wolff] on the set. I think it's better that way:' Shimizu made the jump from
modeling to acting and is enjoying the work on Dante's Cove. 'i\cting is a little
more exciting because you get to interact with other people. I really like that
here! casts different types of people and I had been wanting to work with them
for a long time:'
Newcomer Bennett plays Michelle, who stepped in this season to replace
Erin Cummings in the role. "The timing just worked out perfectly;' explains
Bennett, who had already played the role of Grace in the pilot, which never
aired. Because of scheduling difficulties, she missed the boat on seasons one
and two, but was called back to audition for the part of Michelle. "It was very
last-minute. It's never fun to be the person swooping in and replacing someone,
but thankfully I already knew some of the cast members and Michelle (Wolff]
and I were already good friends:' The sexy brunette beat out over 200 actresses
competing for the role, and is thrilled to have landed the part.
"There was obviously something that I was doing that they liked. And because I am gay I think I really connected with the character:' Bennett says she
believes the gay community is hungry for representation and is proud to be one
of very few out lesbian actors in Los Angeles.

The character of Michelle was formerly played by a more vulnerable actor, so she had to make some acljustments. Replacing a recurring
character isn't always the network's first choice, but soap operas can get
away with it. "Because the character underwent a major transformation
between season two and season three, it worked out;' Bennett says."They
didn't have time to rewrite. They were in a panic. I was reading the script
as I was flying to Hawaii. I got to the set at 10 p.m. Sunday night and at 8
a.m. the next day I was filming:'
To make things more difficult, she hadn't actually seen the show.
Bennett had her work cut out for her, but she impressed everyone with
her professionalism. "Stylistically, it's, well, a supernatural erotic-thriller
soap opera-and it's also a comedy. So more than anything, I was concerned about getting the style of it;' she says.
The style is quirky, magical and truly entertaining-Buffy the Vampire
Slayer meets Baywatch. "It's campy, ic's fun and it's completely addictive;'
says Wolff. "It's a guilty pleasure-basically a gay soap opera:'
And what's a soap opera without a few steamy love scenes? Season
three won't let you down, with some very sexy bedroom footage of the
ladies-not all at once, but in an interesting montage of flashbacks and
fantasy.
Jumping into bed on camera is ofren an actor's job, but was an especially interesting and exciting process. "Filming a love scene is based on
trust;' says Bennett. 'i\nd it's going to come across if people are holding
back:' Doing a love scene with her friend Wolff was admittedly a little
odd. "It was weird in that we're friends, and she's also friends with my
girlfriend. But because of our friendship, there's absolutely no question
that we trust each other;' Bennett says."We were not going to do anything
to make each other uncomfortable. We had a glass of wine beforehand
and sort of relaxed and said OK, let's do this:'
The girls also had a pre-scene talk where they set some boundaries. They
discussed what they would like to see on screen."We wanted to see realistic
love scenes, not two uncomfortable straight girls pawing at each other;' says
Bennett. Though she acknowledges any great actor can pull off a great sex
scene, she feels real lesbians have a slight edge.'Tuere's a reason why Leisha
Hailey's love scenes look better than everyone else'son TheL Word:'
Kadlec agrees. "Not to say there haven't been outstanding lesbian
scenes conceived by straight women, but we as lesbians know best what
we want to see. It's the mind connection that makes it hot, the build-up
and the undressing of each other;' she says. "I think the hottest scenes in
the movie Bound were when they were flirting in the elevator, and the part
with them sitting on the couch. Sure, the hard-core is hot too, but I think
what women really find erotic is the intense unveiling of each other:'
Gay director Sam Irvin admitted he had no idea what to tell the
women to do in bed. "He left it up to us;' says Wolff. "So it was great
working with Jenny and Jill. We all know what looks good and hot and
sexy:' The love triangle will undoubtedly set the stage for some delicious
lesbian drama in season three, making Dante's Cove a possible new fave for
those of us craving some prime-time fun.
'Tm really proud to be on the show;' Wolff beams. "The writing is
great this year and all the characters really have some depth, so it's much
more interesting. We all interact with one another, so it really feels like
an ensemble:'
Kadlec is equally excited and confident that the series will get picked
up for another season. "We gauge the reaction to the show based on a variety of things;' she says.'Tm thinking we'll want to bring it back. I'm just
really excited to get this season out there to have people see it:' ■

December 2007

I51

EEN YEARS since the mega~surge of Paula Cole. After hitting the
stratosphere of popularity with songs like "Where Have All the
Gone" and "I Don't Want to Wait;' Cole needed a break from
the roller coaster life. She got married, had a daughter and went through a
tumultuous divorce. She returns to the music scene on her own terms with her
new album, Courage,a new attitude and a heck of a lot of perspective. Cole first
caught our attention in 1994 with the release of the achingly honest Harbinger,
which is home to the heartrending'Tm So Ordinary:' Tue following year, This
Firespawned several hits and life as Cole knew it was forever changed. Cole is
also a proud veteran of the first Lilith Fair tour in 1997.
Let me ask you about Lilith Fair. What do you think about when you
recall that time and being part of that tour?

I was at the very first show of Lilith Fair, and I was even at the shows with
Sarah [McLachlan] kind of leading up to Lilith Fair, when it was gestat~
ing in our minds. I was her open.ing act in '95 in theaters for the Fumbling
TowardsEcstasytour and I would go out on stage every night and thank
her for having me, another female artist, on the bill-because it was so rare
at the time.
What are some of your most cherished memories from Lilith?

One, the audiences were just amazing. There was something special in the
air-especially before the media got ahold of it-when it was just ours.
They sold out and the audiences were cool and left and it was our precious
little entity and there was so much love in the air. Lilith Fair definitely had
some of the best audiences I've ever felt. Two, the feeling I got in my bones
and heart when we were able to give back to some of the local women's
organizations. Three was being able to meet some of my fellow artists. In
particular, Emmylou Harris.
What, if any, was your fear or anxiety level when releasing Courage as far as how it was going to be received, and how did you feel
about this in comparison to your other records?
I definitely felt scared and wondered if anyone still cared or remembered. On
the other hand, I embrace my age, and I've liv~d enough life that I have
some kind of Buddhist sense of unattachment. I want to come into this
more humbly, so that everyone knows I'm in it for the marathon, not the
sprint. I want to be doing this into my 70s because I need to. I need music.
I'm in it to make honest, meaningful, unique art.
So how much does it crack you up that people can have Paula Cole
ringtones on their cell phones, if they're so inclined?
It's so, so funny. [Laughs.]I'm in a different world now. They have ringtone
charts, download charts, American Idol and MySpace. It's really a differ~
ent landscape. I don't know how I feel about it. I feel like I'm really like a
singeMongwriter who should have had her heyday in the '70s. I'm in the
wrong era.
When you say that, it makes me think of "Lonelytown" from the new
record. I read that you were the queen of the high school musical
and that song made me think of the Cole Porter, George Gershwin,
etc. songbooks.
I have a lot of roots in jazz, and I wanted to be a jazz singer for a while.
Sometimes I loved the songs and sometimes they really didn't feel authen ~

52

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tic, especially as a female. I had to sing [a song] in high school and I had
to wear a negligee and high heels and I'm 16, parading my little body in
this tarty outfit, singing"! Enjoy Being a Girl;' and I'm thinking about the
lyrics. They're still so absurd to me. It kind of had an impact. All these
paralyzing statements of womanhood, Billie Holiday singing about men
who beat her, "But I Love Him;' and I just didn't want to sing those songs,
I didn't want to be part of that. I wanted to write my truth that felt more
meaningful to today.
Moving on to another song from Courage, "Hard to Be Soft."

It's kind of like my "Cowboys;' part two, although nobody would probably get
that because it's a bossa nova and it has these complex chord changes. But
it's like exploration of gender roles-in a lighthearted way-and so I kind
of think of it as a continuation of that thinking, which I actually think
about a lot in my life. It's nice to have this conversation in an interview,
because I don't normally go there in interviews.
Well, here we are.
Yeah. It's nice. I wanted to sing and explore thoughts behind a woman being
the breadwinner and being altogether kind of dominant in the world and
then coming home and being maybe passive in a home situation and also
the role of a man. It's hard to be a woman in the world who's so strong and
then come home and be soft. It's also hard for a man to be in the world and
be perceived in a soft light.
You must be aware you have a huge lesbian following; we have good
taste in music. And although I don't have it on my fridge, I'm sure
there are some gals out there with that famous pie of you and Sarah
Mclachlan smooching.
Oh, really?
I once read that Sarah Mclachlan was amused by people wondering
about her sexuality. She really got a kick out of it. Was it anything
that you ever got a kick out of, people speculating about you?
Oh, I love it. I've been with men, but I love women, I'm attracted to women. I
love them. I love my lesbian following. I feel at home there. I think the soul
is androgynous, and I love women that have a strong animus and I love
men that have strong anima. I'm reluctant to categorize. I fall in love with
the soul inside the body.
You just put out this new record, and you're entering into this
whole new phase of your career and your life. What are your coping
mechanisms?
I know that the people around me will manage my career much better than
before. I feel safer, that I'm in better hands as I go into the world, and
sometimes I'm scared. I'm a hermetic, introverted person. My music heals
me. I couldn't be without it. I have a responsibility to keep doing it. I hope I
can make a little difference in the world with it-that's why I'm here. I just
hope I can braid a personal life harmoniously with a career. I wasn't able to
do that before, and I've learned some hard lessons, and I hope that I have a
happy home life and a long, meaningful career.
I don't think that's really asking for too much.
I'll walk this path and I'll see what happens. I don't know. But I thank you for
your intelligent questions, and I'm really proud and glad to be part of an
interview for CURVE. ■

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Networking Lesbians
Three women find the MySpace connection. By Kyra Thomson
!though the invitation to "see who knows who, or how you are

While Hamilton was setting up her first MySpace account in California,

connected" may sound like the theme of your next local lesbian

Web designer and filmmaker Ruth Selwyn was following a similar path in

event, it's actually a line used by MySpace.com to successfully

Tel Aviv,Israel. A friend suggested that she join MySpace to get support from

encourage an average of 230,000 new people to join its social
networking site each day. MySpace skyrocketed to fame when it launched in
2004 and now ranks as the sixth most visited site in the world, according to

other filmmakers and possibly find a girlfriend. However, faced with a blank
MySpace page, Selwyn Googled "lesbian animation;' and was disappointed
with the results. "I figured there was a hole in the market;' she recalls, "and

Internet traffic analysis company Alexa.
However, just as it was with the first fax machines, a communication trend

fantasized about filling it:'
Selwyn satisfied this need by combining her skills as a Flash

A

doesn't develop unless everyone is onboard. When Arlan Hamilton first

animator, her experiences as a filmmaker and her opinions

jumped on the MySpace bandwagon, it was at the encouragement of a
friend who had discovered the Web site and wanted others to join her

about being a lesbian to create the out-and-proud animation
sensation Lizzy the Lezzy.
"Afrer she was drawn, I recorded some text about being

online. Hamilton eventually used this virtual community to successfully sell T-shirts bearing slogans such as"Shane is my HOMOgirl;' and
to promote her music magazine Interlude."I realized;' she explains, "that

a lesbian and animated her mouth;' explains Selwyn. "Every
TV program has a theme song so the idea for a song came next,

MySpace was the easiest way to reach people who would be interested in
its content:'

and episode one was complete:' The 2-D delight was uploaded onto
her page. Lizzy declared, 'Tm a muff muncher!" to the online world,

This interest and popularity encouraged Hamilton to develop the

and her popularity grew.

blog Your Daily Lesbian Moment, which now attracts thousands of readers each day. "Being able to reach so many people with a push of a button

Meanwhile, in Texas, Steph Stance was also noticing a virtual gap in lesbian representation when it came to YouTube.com

is really astounding and beautiful to me;' says Hamilton.

vlogging or personal video biogs. Founded in 2005, YouTube is currently ranked as the fourth most frequently visited Web site in the

Lizzy the
Lezzy

world, and is the leader in online video viewing and sharing.

Our Top Eight ... Er, 10
We pick out favorites for how to get and stay connected on the Web.
Admit it. You have a profile on at least one if not three or four
of these sites. It all starts with that one little invite, and the next
thiJlg you know you're surfing OurChart for a date, checking out
a new band on MySpace and updating your resume on GLEE. A
recent Harris lnteractive/Witeck-Combs survey showed that queer
women use social networking sites much more than straight gals.
While sites like YouTube and Craigslist are visited most often, we
prefer this crop of gay-friendly sites. - Katie Peoples

Bebo: They call themselves the next generation of social networking, and indeed Bebo is a pretty site. It boasts a clean design
with all the features we've come to know and love, and Bebo
welcomes input from users when developing new features.
FabFemme: Ladies only. FabFemme is social networking for lesbian and bisexual women who want to make friends in new areas, or
find a date. The site has an invite feature that allows you to invite
people in your network to hang out outside the virtural world.
Facebook: Aimed at the college set, Facebook has become one of
the top 10 most visited sites on the Web. With tons of applications,
there are endless possibilities for customizing your profile page.
Flickr: A photo-centric Web site, Flickr makes creating and sharing albums easy. It's also a great place to see work by amateur
and professional photographers or privately share your photos
with family across the country.

GLEE: Gay, Lesbian and Everyone Else, like Community Connect
Inc. 's other niche social networking sites {BlackPlanet, AsianAve
and MiGente), has professional and personal networking, and
news feeds specific to the LGBT community running on its site.
One of the fastest-growing gay sites, GLEE boasts over 20,000
members and 700,000 page views since June 2007.
lmeem: A different spin on the networking concept, lmeem is
music-centric. Here users can find new music, video and photos,
or upload their own work for people to share.
Linkedln: For a more professional way of introducing yourself to
a potential employer, try Linkedln, the Internet's answer to doing
lunch.
MySpace: The largest and most popular networking site,
MySpace set the standard for Internet socializing.
Olivia: Olivia.com raised some brows when it announced it would
launch its own social networking site, Olivia.com/Connect. But
this lifestyle company certainly caters to its target audience with
travel tips and news on upcoming performances.
OurChart: The lesbian networking site may have seemed like a
TV spinoff or a clever marketing ploy, but this site has skyrocketed s_inceits launch in January 2007. It has biogs, comments and
photo albums, but it's the visual web of your chart that makes
it fun.

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Stance became curious about the site after
seeing a story about YouTube on TV, and began watching other people's videos. "Although
there were many talented people from all
walks of life represented on YouTube, I could
not find even one lesbian vlogger;' she reflects.
That's when Stance decided to contribute to
this online community she describes as "without boundaries or limitations" by filming her
opinions and initiating dialogue about various
topics with her viewers.
Through her YouTube page, Stance is able
to voice LGBT concerns to a broader audience, with the hope of fostering greater tolerance. "YouTube is a new frontier that offers enormous opportunity for making connections. If you want to show off your talents and gain visibility, it's the
best place in cyberspace to start:'
Though separated geographically, these three opinionated women are as
easily connected as MySpace promised they would be. Stance eventually set
up a MySpace account to promote her YouTube site, while Selwyn added
Lizzy episodes to YouTube in order to introduce people to her MySpace
page. Hamilton mentioned Lizzy on her blog, which sent thousands more
MySpace users to Selwyn's site. Among Lizzy's new fans were the creators
of LWord Online.com, who asked Selwyn to create an L Word-themed Lizzy
episode. From there Selwyn's audience grew even more, until she was noticed

and approached by Stance to appear in
her vlog. A video of Lizzy the Lezzy
wearing one of Hamilton's famous
shirts and encouraging viewers to help
Hamilton find a mate completed the
connection.
Another thing all three lesbian online celebrities have in common is their
use of this new-found virtual stardom
to promote personal projects and to
further their careers. As a result of her
huge readership, Hamilton is now able
to make a living as a writer, contributing to the Web sites Queersighted,
SuicideGirls and OurChart. Stance has used her video venue to promote
emerging artists through her onlilne series Tune Time. Selwyn's success on
MySpace allowed her to ink a deal with MTV Networks; fans can now find
Lizzy-themed T-shirts, ringtones and e-cards, and she is currently planning a
Lizzy series for television or film.
When asked about the secret to turning their virtual soapboxes into
springboards for success, all three enthuse about the need to inspire one another, to receive instant feedback from fans and communicate back to them,
and so to create a sense of belonging to a global lesbian community.
"It also doesn't hurt to have clips of chicks making out on your page, any
chance you get;' adds Hamilton. "It's like lesbian honey to a lesbian bear:' ■

December 2007

I55

Nota BadSeed
MelissaDentonreflectson hercareerin
theater.ByLaurieK.Schenden
South Dakota doesn't exactly top the list of breeding grounds for actors or
hotbeds of theatrical training. Heck, it probably doesn't even make the list.
But Melissa Denton built a foundation there for an acting career on the
stage, in film and on television.
"My father was a theater professor at South Dakota State University, so I've
been around theater since birth;' she said after a recent performance as the notso-closeted lesbian Miss Fern in the Los Angeles stage production of Bad Seed.

"At"Girl

MiciaMoselytakesherone-woman
showonthe road.ByAzaniaBaker

Micia Mosely's hilarious Where My Girls At? is
coming to a state near you. Mosely, a San Francisco
Bay Area resident by way of Brooklyn, N.Y., is taking this one-woman act on the road and will be
touring the East Coast before setting her sights on
going international. Luckily, I had a chance to chat
with the sexy actor before she packed her bagsand took all of her five characters with her.
What was It like moving to the Bay Area?

I moved to the Bay in '95. I think moving to the Bay
from someplace else is what helped me really
be able to identify the characters because, you
know, when you move, you can really see things
that people who are native to the particular
place aren't able to see, because it feels normal
to them. And for me, I'm kind of like, you don't
find this strange? [Laughs.]
Can you talk about the concept behind the
show?

Oh, and South Dakota isn't exactly a hotbed for lesbians either.
While she remembers basking in the applause doing classic plays such as
Cat on a Hot Tin Roof as a 5-year-old, these days Denton may have found her
niche in parts that embrace the quirky, campy and unconventional instead.
Bad Seed,for instance, was a serious play and a cautionary film in the 1950s
before the Buzzworks Theater Co. of Minneapolis, of which Denton is a member, got a hold of it. The Buzzworks version begins with a character called the
Facilitator, who's basically a dexterous young man (or woman) who sits atop a
refrigerator and monitors the action for the audience.
Every time the dialogue strays from the original script, by Broadway playwright and Pulitzer Prize-winner Maxwell Anderson, the Facilitator tosses a
tissue to the floor. Even during a flurry of flying tissues in certain raucous and
raunchy scenes, it's a hoot to note how much of the original script, meant to
be a "chilling horror story of an 8-year-old murderess born without pity;' has
actually been left intact.
But what actor-director-producer Danny Schmitz recognized when he
staged a less conventional version of the play at the Lake Bowl in Minneapolis
in 1992 is that context is everything.
The Lake Bowl was a combination theater and bowling alley."When you
do shows there, you can hear the smash of the pins;' Denton says.
Schmitz-one of four gay and lesbian actors in the current Los Angeles
production of the play-dons a cutesy dress and pigtails for the role of the
8-year-old demon, and sets the play in surroundings opposite from what the
author intended. Suddenly, the words take on an entirely new, unintentionally
hilarious meaning.
Denton and a number of the cast
members and others in the closely knit
Minneapolis theater community caravanned to Los Angeles for the TV pilot
season in 1996, where they planned to

The premise is that there are auditions being held
Playa won and
for Black Beauty: Americas Next Top Negress,
I have to
admit, so far, Playa's won every time. And from
which is a reality television show where 10
black women live in a house together for 30
the feedback that we've gotten so far, people
days. And the show features four finalists who
have really enjoyed Playa. So some people in
Detroit or Chicago or New York, they'll recare vying for one spot in the house. And then
there's a fifthcharacter who's kind of the host. I
ognize Playa because they have a Playa of their
knew I wanted to do something where I would
own. They won't probably be as attached to her
be able to share four or five characters that I've
being from the Bay.
just come to know, living in the Bay Area.
Are the characters all facets of your personality, or did you pick them up from people
Did you purposefully make your characters
extreme in nature?
that you've met and associate with?
I've gone back and forth. I think the best way to
They are all facets of my personality and, for some
describe it was kind of an archetype. They are
characters, they're more rooted in other people.
definitely extreme, and they're extreme [so they
For example, Lady D is my mother. I was Ziggy
are] able to really get at their uniqueness. I try
when I moved here in '95. Then Playa-when
to tell you a little bit about their story and make
I go to a dub, Playa is everywhere. I tell people,
them a little bit more complex.
I don't have to make this up. All I have to do is
pay attention.
All the characters are great, but Playa sort
"Ar'Girlcontinued on page65
of won the audience over, right?

Spreadingthe D' LoWord
mount a bigger and broader production of Bad Seed.
"We thought it would be a great way to be seen and to get agents'
attention;' says Denton.
They had no idea that the play would become a hit. It won the LA
Weekly award for best comedy ensemble and became a critic's choice
in the Los AngelesTimes.

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With that kind of success,"Everybody stayed;' says Denton. Some
got jobs in TV-Mo
Collins spent five years on MadTV; Melissa
Peterman became a regular on Reba.Denton became the voice of Izzy,
the official mascot of the 1996 Olympics, and later added Seinfeldand
the lesbian film Sex Monster (with Mariel Hemingway) to her credits.
Nearly all of the actors continued to do theater and returned for
Bad Seed revivals five and now 12 years after the original Los Angeles
production. Recently, it was extended at the Lounge Theater, one of
many hip little theaters strung along Santa Monica Boulevard.
The move to Los Angeles also marked Denton's corning out as a
lesbian. She fell for the actress Dana Farner, the woman atop the fridge
in the original Los Angeles production. They've been together for 12
years and recently bought a home in Eagle Rock, outside Los Angeles,
where they live with their two cats.
Needless to say, Miss Fern's lesbianism in Bad Seed has become
more pronounced since then. She will forever see West Hollywood as
the place where she took that major step-being truthful, admitting
who she was. 'J\nd nothing fell apart!" she says, dramatically. The duo
went to city hall to register their domestic partnership, and "confetti
came flying out and the staff from city hall came out applauding:'
It was a defining moment.
Farner has since left her perch on the fridge to become Wolfgang
Puck's rock star sommelier, while Denton continues to work with
Buzzworks productions and also as a program manager with the
Unusual Suspects Theater Co., leading a theater camp for young pro,
bationers, under the auspices of the criminal justice system.
"When I first came to L.A., my focus was getting on TV. I devoted
a lot of energy to that. Then I got into education-using theater as a
way to transform youth:'
Unusual Suspects leads a sort of 12,week theatrical boot camp for
at,risk youth from volatile areas of Los Angeles.
"We write a show with them, then stage it at the end with all the
participants;' says Denton.
After the initial success of Bad Seed in Los Angeles, Buzzworks
produced a piece Denton wrote and directed, Cabin Pressure,at the
Hudson Theater. In between theater work she also performed onstage
at venues such as the Improv in New York City, the Comedy Store in
Los Angeles, and Catch a Rising Star in Boston.
She's now on the board at Buzzworks and looks forward to the
company's next production that she is directing in February 2008,
The Invasion of the Minnesota Normals by Jen Ellison. Based on the
Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory, a 1960s personality
test that, according to Denton, is still in use in mental health fields
today, it's in the same satiric vein as Bad Seed.
"It talks about the psychology of that day-is there a genetic con,
nection to the parents, is bad behavior in the genes?"
The idea, as with Bad Seed,is to twist a serious subject and skewer
pompous prognosticators, to the delight of audiences who love a good
laugh at the expense of the voice of authority. "We're not offending
them ... or we think we're not;' she says. ■

TheSri Lankancomediantalks abouther latest
show.ByTaniaHammidi
Say "D' Lo" to anyone in the know and the name
is sure to bring a smile. D' Lo, also known as the
D' Loco Kid, is a self,described "bald boyish
mofo" who transforms the everyday experiences
of being a butch Sri Lankan into stage comedy.
She uses music, art, storytelling and her hip,hop
and Bharatanatyam dance moves to archive and
honor all the struggles of LGBTs and the diversi,
ties of our lives. Hold on to your hats, ladies and
gentlemen. Here comes D' Lo.
How has your year been?

This year has been intense. I started off rehearsing
with Alison De La Cruz and Adelina Anthony
for our sketch,theater group, Spotlight
Stealerz. We premiered the show with a three,day run in the Bay Area. I was
also in a short film called Heart,ShapedAnus, where I play a militant lesbian.
One of the many highlights was receiving a National Performance Network
grant. I was able to workshop my solo show at a residency in Amherst (Mass.]
and then take the show to the National Asian American Theater Festival in
New York City.
What inspired you to take up a life in the theater?

[It's] where I get the chance to tackle the breadth of what I want to say and, more
importantly, how I want to say it.
Tell me about Ramble-Ations.
Born gay into a Hindu family and raised by hip,hop-gay, Hindu, hip,hop,
these three things make me up, but don't allow for each other. I flip from
being an immigrant mother, to a suburban princess giving a eulogy for her
friend who died in the tsunami, to a spiritual guide named White Eagle who
believes that spirits have a gender, to a reincarnated avatar of Gandhi who
wants to share his lessons with the world, to a butch kid who talks about her
love for her bois. These characters are all so different from one another and
are complex and filled with contradictions, but they all offer their stories with
a lot of love.
What journey do you take your audiences on?

To some South Asians or Sri Lankans, I might be the only gay person they are
close with. And the same goes with my gay folks-I'm the only Sri Lankan
they know. Through storytelling, getting close with folks, it is plain and
simple-we are so much more similar than we'd like to think. Sometimes
it's through intimate storytelling that we're finally able to drop our bags of
prejudice.
What is a favorite line from your work?

The true revolutionaries are the ones who are nicest.
Who does your work speak to?

My work speaks to all the communities I feel a part of, and therefore a respon,
sibility to-Sri Lankan, Sri Lankan American, South Asian, people of color,
gay folks, queers, transgendered, activists, artists, religious and spiritual.
What does the world need?

An understanding that everyone is walking with various degrees of hurt and
pain. Compassion in the way we talk. Patience in the way we listen. Upon
waking up, we should be in competition with ourselves to do as many good
deeds as we can. ■

December 2007

I57

TheBestof

~

•

By Colleen M. Lee

Lesbian"
Theater
As many of our readers know, each December CURVE puts together a list of the
best lesbian theater in the country. We decided to mix things up this time. This
year we shine the spotlight on the little gals. The small regional theaters you
probably haven't heard of, the aspiring high schooler working her way from
audition to audition, and the women who took initiative and founded their
own theater companies.

Renita Martin, Actor, Director and Playwright, Brooklyn, N.Y.
Being involved in lesbian theater for over 15 years hasn't always been easy, but
Renita Martin takes it in stride. "My challenge has been being a lesbian of
color and straddling all the communities I live in;' Martin says. She has written
and performed in countless productions, including this year's It Is the Seeing,
a retrospective of war that focuses on poor
people, people of color, women, gays and lesbians who have been engaged in quiet battles. Her most recent Blue Fire on the Water
touches on two women blues musicians who
are lovers, and explores Hurricane Katrina
as a metaphor for exposure. "What happens
when everything is swept away?" she asks.
Blue Fire will appear at both The Theatre
Offensive in Boston and Dixon Place in New
York City.

Teresa Mock, Actor, Producer and Writer, Minneapolis
Teresa Mock has done her share of producing and writing for the theater. She
did cabaret work to benefit Hurricane Katrina relief, and directed Body and
Sold, a play that focuses on victims of human traffic.king (all proceeds of the
play went to Breaking Free, an organization seeks to help victims of human
trafficking)."! believe that queer artists have a unique responsibility to themselves because it is so important for us to do our part in the fight for equality
by bringing ideas and being visible in the works of theater productions;' says
Mock. Her latest project is her autobiographical solo performance PieceStory,
which takes the audience on a journey through her
life."The performance focuses on [my] experiences,
some trying, some joyous;' says Mock. However,
she is putting her career on hold for the moment
and heading to London to work on a master of fine
arts degree through Naropa University, Boulder,
Colo., and the London International School for
Performing Arts.
Susan Jeremy, Stand-up Comic, Actor and Writer, Brooklyn, N.Y.
Susan Jeremy started her career cracking jokes as a stand-up comic for gay
and straight audiences, but has since made her way into theater to develop
her characters. Since then, she has co-written three plays: Was That My 15
Minutes?,P.S. 69 and Moving in Reverse.She has toured extensively for each

ss Icurve

during the past eight years. Her 10-year relationship with a Brazilian immigrant inspired a play
she is currently working on, Brazil Nut, about
cultural differences and the trials and tribulations
of immigration. For Jeremy the sexual preference
of her audience makes no difference. "If [a play)
moves the audience, it has achieved its purpose;'
she says.

Kelli Simpkins and Amy Matheny, Actors (and Partners),
Chicago
You might recognize Kelli Simpkins from the bit parts she had in major
Hollywood films like A Leagueof Their Own and ChasingAmy, but she's better known for her work in theater. She is the creator of and an original actor in
The LaramieProject,and also acted in I Think I Like Girls-she played two lesbians and a trans character. She is currently working on a new elay ( thanks to
a natir,nal grant) about lesbian actor Charlotte Cushman. At Chicago's famed
Steppenwolf Theater Company, Simpkens met her partner Amy Matheny,
also no stranger to the stage. Matheny has performed in over 35 playsbut
her claim to fame in Chicago's lesbian community is playing Gabrielle in both
productions of Xena Live: EpisodeOne and Xena Live: Episode2, The Musical.
Both Matheny and Simpkins appeared in the play ExecutionofJustice.
Sue Hamilton, Director and Producer, Los Angeles
Sue Hamilton began her career as an actor, but now directs and produces original and women's plays. Her earlier training makes her the perfect actor's director because it helped her understand what actors
go through on opening night and beyond. "I give
actors a long leash and empower them to create
a character that they can call their own;' she says.
She made her directorial debut with Eve Ensler's
FloatingRhoda & the GlueMan and from there she
went on to direct another 13 plays before becoming
the producing artistic director for the Los Angeles
Gay & Lesbian Center's Lily Tomlin Jane Wagner
Cultural Arts Center. ''As a director and concept
creator, knowing your audience is one of the most
important things to determine before you do anything;' she says. "Who will
want to see this? And how long can we expect that this project will inspire
people to support it?"
Rayne Puertos, Actor, Tampa, Fla.
"(I've been) bouncing from audition to audition since I could speak;' says 17-yearold actor Rayne Puertos. Puertos has been involved in plays such as The Vagina
Monologues,Cats, Into the Woods, Grease,The Tempestand Chicago-just to
name a few.She attended the Howard W. Blake Performing Arts High School
in Tampa, Fla., until she came out to her parents. "When I told my parents,

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they flipped out and yanked me out of school, calling me fragile and disillusioned;'
says Puertos. She has since returned to the school and is now active in all areas of
theater. Currently, she's working behind the scenes in a production of Too Much
Light Makes the Baby Go Blind.

Claire Avitabile, Director, Producer and Theater Owner, Minneapolis
Claire Avitabile and her life partner, Blythe Davis, started and are owners of the
20% Theatre Company Twin Cities located in Minneapolis. "We focus on raw, new
work, [and) the underrepresented females in professional
theatre;' says Avitabile. Last year they produced Piece Story
and also Carolyn Gage's TheSecond Coming ofJoan of Arc,
which includes a bold interpretation of Joan of Arc as a
lesbian. There are 20% Theatres in New York and another one in Chicago, which are run independently of each
other, and all the artistic directors are lesbians. "Our mission [is to) support female playwrights and artists;' Avitabile says proudly. The 20%
Theatre is now playing Gina Gionfriddo's After Ashley and Avitabile is directing
Standards of Care by transgender playwright Tobias K. Davis.

Tammy Shanley, Actor, Key West, Fla.
Tammy Shanley is passionate about theater. She has acted in The Tempest,
Macbeth and Emma. "I believe queer theater is just as important as any other work

chat deals with education, provoking new thought, laughter, offending, history;'
she says."I am a lesbian; however, I am an actor, too:' She studied in Akron, Ohio,
and recently relocated from Minneapolis co Key West, Fla. Before she moved,
Shanley was a part of Theatre Unbound, an organization dedicated co opening
opportunities for women actors, directors, playwrights and designers. She is currently working on a script.

Diana "Dayne" Voorheis, Actor and Writer, Long Beach, Calif.
Diana "Dayne" Voorheis has accomplished many things. But how many actors
can saythey'veplayed Alice from TheL Word on stage? Voorheis and her friend
entered a contest to perform a scene from TheL Word and won. And how did
she do~"[I] got a lot of sweet comments and warm attention after the performance,"she says. After several years away from live theater, she happily says today,
"Finally-I'm back on stage!" She has performed in productions including Steel
Magnolias
and Lettice and Lovage. What can she say? She's a multitasker. "I went
fromplaying a nun in Handy Dandy one night to a young Bronx punk in TheDay
theBronx Died the next;' she says. It was her best performance, she says, because
no one expected her to play a male role-something she prepared for by observing how street-smart men walk, dress and talk. She even wore male underwear.
"Dressing chis way made me feel that I was really a male youth, which helped me
reach deep into his character;' she says. •

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Maryanna Clarke, Theater Project Founder, Nashville, Tenn.
The mission of the Tennessee Women's Theater Project, says its founder Maryanna
Clarke, is to create opportunities for women in professional theater. "Women are underrepresented onstage, backstage and in theater management. While all roles are by
default for men, roles fur women have to be specificallywritten for them;' Clarke says.
The goal is to increase positive representation of women in theater through education
and equality practices. "We will never produce a show that has more roles for men
than it has for women;' she says. The project strives to bring professional women in
theater to the forefront and live theater to underserved audiences in Tennessee."We
create opportunities for women in professional theater;' Clarke adds. ■
Additional research by Lindsey]. Taylor.

LOCALPLAYHOUSESWE LOVE
1. The20%TheatreCompany,
lwin Cities,Minn.:Produces
new
andprogressive
workby female,transgender
andgender-queer
theatreartists,whilesupportingthe samegenderminoritiesartisticallybehindthe scenes.(twentypercent.org)
2. ActOutProductions,
Columbus,
Ohio:Promotes
gayand
lesbiantheaterandmulticulturaltheatricalservices.ActOuthasproducedmanyaward-winning
shows.In additionto performinglocally
in Ohio,theyalsotravelnationally.(members.aol.com/FabAct1)
3. DRAMA!,
NewOrleans:
Catersto theLGBT
community
andis committedto representing
thecommunity
throughits theaterandthearts
performances
in the BigEasy~ven afterKatrina.(dramano.org)
4. Jump-StartPerformance
Company,
SanAntonio,
Texas:Is
committedto the creationof art that is a lastingvoicefor diverse
communities.
uump-start.org)
5. NewConservatory
TheatreCenter,SanFrancisco:
Advances
the LGBTcommunityby usingtheaterto bringenlightenment
and
changeto youth,adultsandartists.(nctcsf.org)
6. OutProductions/Les
Productions
Out,Montreal:
A nonprofit
arts groupandregisteredcharitythat exploresandcelebrates
queer
culture,historyandidentity,theyproduceplaysin bothEnglishand
French.(out.ca)
7. OutwardSpiralTheatreCompany,
Minneapolis:
Champions
the queercommunitywith its dedicationto producingtheaterfroma
queerpointof view.(outwardspiral.org)
8. StageQ,Inc.,Madison,Wis.:Promoteslesbian,gayandother
queerpersonsin the arts by featuring"out" actors,artists,musicians,writersandperformers.(stageq.com)
9. TheatreAskew,NewYorkCity:Believesin a radicalnew
approachto the representation
of "queerness"as onethat encompassesa varietyof identities.(theatreaskew.com)
1O.TheaterOffensive,
Cambridge,
Mass.:Represents
the diverse
realitiesof queerlivesin art with the goalof buildinga progressive
community.(thetheateroffensive.org)
11. TheaterOut,Anaheim,Calif.:Presentsworkby lesbianandgay
playwrightsandproducesbothclassicandnewworkrelatedto gay
culture.(theatreout.com)
12. Threshold
Theatre,Belmont,Mass.:Thisnot-for-profitorganizationis dedicatedto the discoveryanddevelopment
of women
artistsfromthe past,presentandfuture.(thresholdtheatre.org)
13. TheatreRhinoceros,
SanFrancisco:
Theoldestqueertheater
in the UnitedStates,acclaimedRhinoturns30thisyear.(therhino.org)
14. TriangleProductions,
Portland,Ore.:Is a not-for-profitorganizationthat's in its 17thseasonof cateringto the LGBTQ
community
with award-winning
productions.
(tripro.org)
15. WhoWantsCake?Theatre,Ferndale,Mich.:Blursthe lines
betweenrace,income,religionandsexuality-this newtheateris
locatedin Detroit'sgayborhood.
(whowantscaketheatre.com)
16. WowcateTheatre,NewYork:Catersto all women.It beganas
a festivalbut madeits wayintoa permanent
spotandlesbiansloveit.
(wowcafe.org)
- LindseyJ. Taylor
December 2007

I 59

Reviews Sapphic Screen

Worlds for Two
Love is about shared perspective.

I By Candace Moore

TheGolden
Compass
(NewLine):Afterthis
month'sreleaseof
TheGoldenCompass,
the nationwill finally
believethata 12-yearoldgirl couldsavethe
world.In Compass,
whichhitstheaters
Dec.7, Lyra(playedby
DakotaBlueRichards)
setsoutto saveher
kidnapped
bestfriend,
butalongthejourney
discovers
she'sdestinedto savenotonly
herworld-in which
humanshaveanimal
alteregosandwitches,
bearsandGyptians
roam-but alsoours.
Theepic,whichalso
starsNicoleKidmanand
These new imports don't tell girl-meets-girl tales from the
DanielCraig,is based
outside looking in. They evocatively enter the inter-subjective
onthefirst novelof
the HisDarkMaterials spaces of lesbian romance.
booktrilogyby Philip
Spider Lilies (Wolfe): This visually lush Taiwanese lesbian
Pullman,
famousfor
love story vividly portrays the worlds of performance, internal
havingcriticizedC.S.
Lewisfor hismilandscape, online connection, artistry, memory and desire. Two
sogyny,racismand
women who fooled around as young neighbors meet again
sadomasochistic
relish years later in a tattoo parlor. Jade (Rainie Yang) is a chipper
for violence.
Weget
webcam girl in a green wig who confesses childhood secrets into seehowPullman's
stead of disrobing and plays with a doll rather than a G-string.
series-considered
a
Plus, her grandmother keeps stumbling in front of the digital
directrebuttalto Lewis'
camera. While her goofy show is not attracting one-on-one
propagandist
workcustomers, the stammering cop (Jian-hung Shen) who's supposed
playsin Peoria.
And,to
to bust her is enamored. In search of a sexy tattoo to drum up
watcha 12-year-old
business, Jade ends up face-to-face with her first love Takeko
provegirlsgotgame.
(goldencompassmovie.(Isabella Leong) behind the needle. Trying to unlock stonecom)- MeaChavez
faced Takeko's acknowledgment of their adolescent romance,
Jade commissions her to ink a design of"love" onto her body,
only to find that Takeko's tattoos aren't decorative, they're talismans that cause real and surreal things to happen. The winner
of the Berlin Film Festival's Teddy Award, Zero Chou's second
feature imaginatively captures how experiencing others and

60

Icurve

fantasizing about ourselves sometimes leads to missed connections, and occasionally to beautiful overlaps. (wolfevideo.com)

Love Sick (Cinequest): In Romanian, the title of this
film (and the novel it's adapted from) means "sickly relationships;' and it is to director Tudor Giurgiu and novelist Cecilia
Stefaneschu's great discredit that the love between two
Bucharest college girls is equated with incest between brother
and sister. That said, the film version of the relationship between Alex (Joana Barbu), a book-smart country mouse, and
Kiki (Maria Popistasu), the jaded party girl who becomes her
confidante, best friend and lover, is portrayed as anything but
sick. The camera dotes on the deepening bond between the two
girls during the year Alex boards upstairs from Kiki's family
home, and the lovers are depicted as two people who fall in love
by meeting each other halfway-physically, mentally and emotionally. Kiki's abusive relationship with her brother Sandu, on
the other hand, wreaks havoc wherever it touches down. But
troubling parallels aren't the only problem here; scenes in real
time that have scarcely been cut or edited cause this picture,
with its hyper-dramatic incest subplot and overwrought narrative, to drag. While she doesn't singlehandedly save the show,
Worldsfor Two continuedon page62

DVD PICKS
authorof international
bestsellerRebecca,
andit shows
the writeras a gorgeous,
somewhatawkwardupperclassBritwhois marriedwith
children,buthas"the heartof a
boy,"andwhobecomesutterly
infatuatedwiththe glamorous
wife of herAmericanpublisher.Butthenthereis alsothe
olderwomanin Daphne'slife,
GertrudeLawrence,
the actor,
whohasthe auraof a witty,
Thethree
TwoWeeks(MGM):A portrayal seductivepanther.
of foursiblingsfacingthe death womencirclearoundeach
of theirmother,in whichhumor otherfor yearswith Daphne
at the center,andthe ultimate
heals,angerexacerbates
and
directionof theirmutualdestiny
lovehelpsthisfamilyfacethe
remainsa mysteryuntilthe end
inevitable.
SallyFieldplays
of thefilm. (logoonline.com)
Anita,the motherof three
- UrsulaSteck
grownsonsanda daughter.
Aftertryingeverythingelse,
Anitafacesherlastweeksof
life in hospicecareat the home
sheshareswith hersecond
husband.Herdutifuldaughter
Emilyhasbeencaringfor her.
Anita'ssonsarrivefromtheir
busylivesunsureof whatto
expect.Keith,the oldestanda
filmmaker,shootsan interview
with his motherin whichshe
appearspolished,bright-eyed
andmostlyhappy.Clipsof this
footageareshownthroughout Dorm(TartanU.S.A.):Inthis
crazy,Asianhorror
the movie.Theinterviewoffers supremely
flick, 12-year-old
Chatreeis
viewersthe arcof Anita'slife
transferred
to anall-boyboardas shegoesfromchildhood
to
ingschoolwheretheteachparenthood,
fromfightingcaners
don'tcareandthe other
certo finallyfacingdeath.The
boysbullyhimwith storiesof
siblingsjoketo easetheirpain
hanginggirlsanddeadboys.
andAnitais just as involvedin
the laughterastheyare.Bonus Finallyhe makesa friend,only
to discoverthatVichienhas
points:HeroesCleaDuVall
a darksecretof hisownand
co-stars.(mgm.com)
- Mea
thenthe creepyallusionsto
Chavez
sexualrepression
seemclear.
Daphne(Logo):If you'rein the (Tartanfilmsusa.com)-Diane
Anderson-Minshall
moodto completely
immerse
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TheUnderworld
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Trout:Vol.1 Discovery
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lovestoriesof post- Entertainment):
friendwith a loveof hydrology
WorldWarII Europe,
thenthisis
(orfreshwaterfishing)?Thisis
themoviefor you.Thebeautithe gift for her.Thisacclaimed
fullyshotfilm is inspiredbythe
seriesgoesinsidestreamslettersof Daphne
duMaurier,
MIU

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N!I..DOtAl'UNCA.VA.l,fAQtNICHJUONa::MUTOHDU'IAU.

alivewithtrout,insects,
crawfishandmore-and offers
upWendell"Ozzie"Ozefovich's
PBS-style
narrationonwhat
goeson in that murkyH2O.
Focusing
onthe secretsof wild
andhatcherytrout,Underworld
givesthoseaquaticbeasts
thesamelovingattentionthat
othersheaponwhalesand
tropicalstunnerswithoutthe
usualcannedaquariumshots.
(lifesizeentertainmentcom)
- SusanHernandez

LouisC.K.:Shameless
(HBO):
Whatdoesthisstraightwhite
dudehaveto offerqueers?A
hilariouspro-gayandsometimeshomoerotic
stand-up
specialwitha charactersimilar
to C.K.'sownlesbo-friendly
HBOseries,LuckyLouis.His
riffson EwanMcGregor
and
gaymarriageareworththe
rental.Hisfirst HBOcomedy
half-hourspecialis a bonus.
(HBO.com)
- DAM
LuellaMiller(LifeSize
Entertainment):
DianeGiraud's
taut psychological
thrillerhas
shadesof Polanski.
When
3O-something
Lydiatakesin
seductiveLuellaafterfinding
herhiding,she'sin for more
thanshebargained
for.As
Luellaunleashes
hersexual
power,it disruptsLydiaandthe
restoftheirsmallNewZealand
town.Theshocking
endwill
leaveyoudebating
for.days.
(Lifesizeentertainmentcom)
-DAM

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connecting lesbians
December 2007

I61

Q+A

Mia Michaels
Worlds for Two continued from page 60

Mia Michaels started taking dance classes at
the age of three and began choreographing at
11. In addition to being one of the most popular
choreographers on Fox's hit show So You Think
You Can Dance, she is also the founder of a
New York-based dance company called RAW.
Michaels talks with CURVE about her amazing choreography, a possible guest spot on The
L Word, and the artist she'd love to work with
most. - Lyndsey D:4.rcangelo

How does it feel to be in the spotlight?
You know, I don't think much about it because
I'm kind of an internal person. It's a little
strange when I go out and people are like,
"Ahhhh!" because I don't understand it. I'm
just doing what I love to do.

The dance you choreographed for So You
Think You Can Dance about meeting your
father in heaven was very powerful and
incredibly personal.
It was personal. When we were in rehearsal, I couldn't ... to this day I can't even get into it about my
dad because it's such a touchy thing for me and so emotional. We had an amazing relationship,
so when I was in rehearsal I couldn't even talk about it. I would write notes to the dancers about
what I wanted them to do because I didn't want to be that vulnerable on camera.

Was it hard to put so much of yourself out there?
I wasn't really thinking about it. I was just thinking about the idea of meeting my dad in heaven and
how cool it would be. My dad was a smoker and died of lung cancer. I had been a smoker since
I was 14. The day of rehearsal I had just come in from having a smoke and it hit me ... why am
I creating a dance about meeting my dad in heaven? It freaked me out because I was thinking, I
don't want to meet him right now. I want to live my life. I quit smoking that day.

Tell me a little bit about Reality at Work, aka RAW, and what it means.
RAW was a dance company I created in New York. ft lasted for two years. It was at a time when I really found myself and understood my movement. The response was amazing, and it kind of put
my name on the map. That's when everything started happening commercially, and one thing led
to another, so I had to let the company go. RAW is about me not conforming to commercialism.
I stay true to what my vision and instincts are. I am very proud of chat.

You've worked with Madonna and Prince; who else would you like to work with?
I'd love to work with Bjork. I love artists who aren't afraid to be different and be who they are.

How about other projects? Would you be open to a guest spot on The L Word?
Yes. [Laughs.]

With such a lesbian following, there's been some speculation about your sexuality.
Well, I've always been with men. But I am also a very free spirit and I believe that who we fall for
is more about the human spirit and not sexuality. I've been with men because that's who I have
connected to at this point in my life. But who's to say? I have no idea what tomorrow will bring
or who I'm going to meet. That's just how I look at it.

What's up next for Mia?
I'm creating a clothing line called RAW. It should be in stores by spring or summer of 2008. It's
unisex lifestyle-wear made from natural fabrics like hemps and cottons. It's amazing, really raw.
It's like Jesus meets Lenny Kravitz. I have a couple of stage projects floating around. I love doing
stage. Ocher than that, I'm going to just be Mia for a while. ■

62

Icurve

Popistasu is irresistibly watchable, and renders
her character skillfully. (cinequestonline.org)

Looking
for
Cheyenne
(Regent
Releasing): This off-the-map, zany French
drama about a high school science teacher's reunion with her ex-girlfriend on the outskirts of
capitalistic society explores alternatives to "the
system" that might sustain life, love and the longing to be social. Director Valerie Minetto's poetic
and theoretical-if
abstract-film
offers philosophical and radical notions to those who are
hungry for dissension. But it proceeds too intellectually at times and its use of magical realism
feels stretched. While we buy Cheyenne's (Mila
Dekker) telepathic visits to Sonia (Aurelia Petit)
and understand chat their love suffers the taint of
the real, the film takes a too-theatrical turn when
Sonia's past lovers materialize and offer dueling
monologues while she's in bed with someone new.
It's hard to distinguish what's really happening
from what Sonia is working through internally,
aided by fantasy, though this is equally the pleasure of the film. Sonia's journey to the caravan
where Cheyenne lives among exiles leaves her
sure that living by candlelight and skinning rabbits for dinner doesn't solve anything, but on her
return to Paris, she doubts the widespread need
for Prozac, too. Cheyenne sees Sonia's struggle
with leaving material things as a lack of creativity: "To live together;' she says, "you need lots of
imagination:' This film is certainly not lacking in
that department; it's as much an allegorical love
story as a manifesto, suggesting that we can still
find sustenance in the realities we construct with
others. (regentreleasing.com) ■

In the Stacks

Reviews

Looking Both Ways
It's all about sex, except when it isn't. IBy Rachel Pepper
From the touchy topic of women's bisexuality to that of female
masturbation, weve got dibs on the dirt you need to be happily
buzzed, or bi, this issue.

Look Both Ways, Jennifer Baumgardner (Farrar,
Straus and Giroux): At the conclusion of Baumgardner's
latest book on bisexuality, Look Both Ways: Bisexual Politics,
one is left unsure of the exact message she's trying to convey.
Is it that feminism causes
female bisexuality? That
we re all bisexual, really?
That college plus the
music of Ani DiFranco
make bisexuality a natural choice for young
women? And is this book
really about politics?
Well, not really. But no
matter. Look Both Ways
is still an engaging read,
exploring the many layers of female bisexuality
(the book doesn't touch
on male sexuality much,
which isn't clarified in

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the title) for a generation
influenced by feminism,
lesbian activism on campus and yes, great music.
Baumgardner, who was
an intern at Ms. magazine
in the early '90s, wrote
several books on young
women and feminism,
such as Manifesta: Young
Women, Feminism, and
the Future and Grassroots:
A Field Guide for Feminist Activism. She dated Amy Ray of the
Indigo Girls and, after they broke up, got pregnant by a male
partner. Shes a lively writer, and the book is a personal, fun
introduction to what bisexuality means to younger women, as
well as the problems inherent in an often misunderstood identity. Indeed, bisexuality is a tricky identity to inhabit, especially
in the lesbian world, where bisexual women are often seen as
psychosexually incomplete, as competitors or even as traitors.
Even the word itself is problematic. "The word bisexual makes
me cringe at times, but saying I'm heterosexual or a lesbian feels
inaccurate, regardless of who I am in a relationship with. [T]he
label bi sounds bad because, at least in some ways, bisexuals are an unliberated, invisible and disparaged social group;'

Baumgardner writes. Still, bisexual women must be seen as having their own identity, she suggests, not as part-time lesbians,
since "bisexual women don't know what it's like to be lesbian, if
there are even universal elements oflesbian experience:' So how
do we find common ground with our bisexual sisters, whom the
author calls the "conduits for the cultural conversation America
is having about gay rights?" Baumgardner doesn't seem to know,
other than simply telling everyone to keep looking both ways.
But hey, at least the view is good.

Getting Off, Jamye Waxman (Seal Press): Former
Babeland employee and sex writer Jamye Waxman sheds light
on one of the most taboo topics around: female masturbation.
From definitions of what an orgasm is-and how to have oneto a rundown on current models of vibrators (sure, you've heard
of the Hitachi Magic Wand, but what about the Lelo or the
Cone?) to celebrity confessions,
this book has
the right buzz
on the topic. Yes,
there are other
books on the
subject out there,
but Waxman is
both
seriously
informed
and
sweetly
informal,
lending
A WOMAN'S
GUIDf
TO MASTUOATION
this text a sense of history
(who knew the Greeks were
known for making dildos, or
that the motivation behind
Kellogg brand cereals was
to prevent kids from masturbating by serving them a
cold breakfast?) and science
( the U-spot orgasm is a new
one
to me). Waxman is at
J•mye W•xm•n
her best when she's acting
the sex saleswoman, like in
the "Self Love and Sex Toys Too" chapter, when describing the
varieties of dildos one can buy, like "curvy, straight, or bumpy;'
"vibrating or static;' "butt stuff" and even phthalate-free, an
important consideration if you don't want toxic chemicals in
your privates. There are, however, a few topics Waxman skimps
on. For example, on the topic of multiple orgasms she fails
to provide an accurate description. Still, for any woman who
wants to know how to masturbate or expand her repertoire
(should she already be experienced), this book will be a most
pleasurable read. ■

Getting Off

EDITOR'S
PICK
WordWarriors,
Ed.
AlixOlson(Seal
Press):
Prize-winningpoetAlixOlson
hasputtogetheran
amazingcollectionof
workby35 of today's
mostprominent
female
spoken-word
poets.
Theessaysbythe
contributors
abouta
particularmomentin
theirlivesareespecially
interesting
because
theygivea greatinsight
intotheworkof these
women.Mostof the
womenfromSisterSpit
_make
appearances
here,including
the
poetrygroup'sfounder,
Michelle
Tea.Thebook
alsoincludespieces
by EileenMylesand
PatriciaSmith.Some
of themoreinteresting
contributors:
NatalieE.
Ilium,a poetbornwith
cerebralpalsywhose
poetryhelpedherfind
hervoice,andAyaDe
Leon,whosepoem
"Cellulite"encourages
womento "go 'head"
andjiggle.Thepoems
areencouraging
and
inspiring;definitely
a must-read
for any
spoken-word
fan.
- KatiePeoples

December 2007

I63

Q+A

Smarty-Pants

Hilary Goldberg

Our roundup of the year's most
thought-provoking academic rags.

Whether she is bouncing onto the set
of her latest film production or sinking
into the red vinyl booth of her favor~
ire writing spot, director, writer and
poet Hilary Goldberg has a knack for
telling lesbian stories. Her currently
touring film, In the Spotlight,brings
starlets Guinevere Turner, Michelle
Tea and Clint Catalyst into a metafic~
tional tale of finding one's own voice
(hilarygoldberg.com). Logo picked up
her work in 2007, and she received the
Filmmaker's Development Grant from
POWER UP this year. We caught up
with Goldberg on tour with Giraffe
MedicineBook,her recently published
book based on her 2003 poetry al~
bum. - Tania Hammidi

You are a talented lesbian and genderqueer storyteller. What
inspires you?
My art begins and ends in my heart. On remarkable occasions, I am moved
outside of myself, like a Cubist painting, and then I have to negotiate ev~
ery aspect of it. My compulsion to share this through art is unavoidable.
Your work is smart and so funny.
"Hilary" is derived from hilarious, and I think my parents knew that they
were going to need a sense of humor to deal with me, and that I would
need one too.
I dropped acid at 14, sat at the bottom of a swimming pool in Miami, Fla.,
and asked myself why I shouldn't just stay down there. The answer came
back that I'm here to make people laugh, so I suppose it is part of the
bargain for my continued existence.
Tell me about the poem "Zero Point" from Giraffe Medicine Book.
Zero point is the lowest energy-like a vacuum state or empty space. I had
a particularly hard time after the ending of a significant relationship that
defined my early 20s and walked around like my pilot light was out. I
seemed to attract lots of people into my life that were at one time combus~
tible but were also burnt out.
When I chose to return to waking life, I tried to bring my friends with me, but
it doesn't work that way, as everyone is on their own journey outside of the
collective one. So for mysel£ I walked darkness home.
Penny Arcade introduces the book. Cool.
Penny Arcade is the first artist to put how she feels about my work in writ~
ing, and I'm incredibly appreciative of that. We joke about how I was just
beyond the veil, chomping at the bit to incarnate and join all of the radical
movements in the late '70s, but then I got here and I didn't know how to
speak yet, or walk, let alone march.
What message does your work give to lesbians?
Be unapologetic, never lose your voice and carve out the world you want to
live in. ■

Bridges:JewishFeminist
Journal:
Withessays,
fiction,poetry,art
andreviewsontopicsof interestto activists,
Jews,feminists
and
queers-including
celebrated
translations
of Latino,Spanish
and
Yiddish
lit-this biannual
journalis oneof themostdiverseofferings
available
in women'sstudies.Recent
piecesincludeMaskitBendel's
penetrating
reportonbreastcanceramongPalestinian
womenand
TerriSchiavo
Inc.,a performance
piecebyJylLynnFelman.
(bridgesjoumal.org)
Hypatia:AJournal
of Feminist
Philosophy:
Named
fortheancientEgyptian
woman
philosopher,thequarterly
Hypatia
hasbecome
anindispensable
source
for newworkonphilosophyandwomen's
studiessinceit began in
1986.Alltheusualdal11ngs
of lesbian
feminist
philosophy,
likeClaudia
GardandAlisonJaggar,
arehere,joinedbynewcomers
writingabout
homophobia
andpower,Sept11 andevenThe
L Word.
Academics
tacklingTheL Word.How
canyouresist?(msu.edul~hypatia)

TheJournal
ofFeminist
studiesIn
lllllglon: StraightouttaGambridge,
the
biannual
JFSRisthenation'soldest
Interdisciplinary,
interreligious
feminist
academic
journalin religious
studies.
Recentdispatches
includeHollyJoan
Toensing's
"Women
of Sodom
and
Gomorrah:
Collateral
Damage
in theWar
AgainstHomosexuality?"
anda debate
onAfricanAmerican
womanism.
The
joumafalsosponsors
a NewScholar
Awardforemerging
offeministand religiousschool&-note
thatyoudon'tneed1Dhaveanadvancedacademic
degreeto apply.
(hds.harvard.eduljfsrJ
..-.c11111· Fllllilllllft,Rw, 1'rlnlnlttonallam:
Hostedbythegals
at SmithCollege,
MBridianB
is a biannual
journalthatoffersexciting
newapproaches1D,ct10larlY
and creative
workbyand aboutwomen
of color.WhileHelenaGrlce'spiece lastyearontransracial
adoption
doesnotfocusonsame-sex
U.S.couples,
her overview
of adoption
narratives
shouldberequired
readingforanyone
consideringadoptingfromabroad.(smlth.Bdulmerldians)

SocialTextThisdaringcultural-studies
quarter1y
madewaves
lastfaUwithi1sspecial iUuesubtitledWhat'sQuser
AboutfJutJtJt'
Studies
Now?Co-editedbyDavid
L Eng(editorof OueBr
InAsian
America),thealwayscompelngJudith
Halberstam
(Oude,
Whn's MyGend8f?
orIs There
LifeonUtanus?J
andJose
Esteban
Munoz
(OlsidtJnllt'ica:
Queers
of ColorandthePerformance
of
Politics,.
(socialtext.duks}Ountals.org)
- JuliaBloch

C,

a:
w

co

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0

(!)

fr
:5
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64

I curve

PAGE TURNERS
DianeKeaton'srabble-rouser
characterfrom Sleeper.Each
namealsohasanorigin,source
andquotesoyoucanbrushup
onyourgeektriviawhiledecidingwhatto callyourbundleof
joy.(quirkbooks.com)
- Jenna
Loceff

Iridescence,
ed.Joliedu Pre
(AlysonBooks):Thechallenge
is findinganeroticaanthology
that is differentfromthe rest,
with storiesthat donotall have
familiarthemes.Iridescence
breaksthat pattern,providingus
witha culturallydiverseandvery
sensualcollection.It embraces
anassortment
of storytypesand
styles,recognizing
that eroticais
veryindividualandpersonalto
the reader.Includedin this 23storyanthology
aresomewellknownauthorslikeFionaZedde,
aswell as lesser-known
authors
likeWinnieJerome.Thecommon
threadis thatall arewell-written,
andtheyareactuallystories,not
just scenes.It is a collectionthat
trulycapturesthe rainbowthat
ourflag represents.
(alyson.com)
- Kathilsserman

AnnetteVallon,
JamesTipton
(HarperCollins
Publishers):
A fictionalstorybasedon real
characters,
JamesTiptonrecreatesAnnetteVallon'slife in one
of thosefictionalbiographies
that areso popularrightnow.In
hisstory,Vallon,the mistressof
EnglishpoetWilliamWordsworth,
is a smart,braveandwillful
heroine,whousesall herskills
to survivethe FrenchRevolution
andkeepherdaughtersafe.
Nodirectlesbianinterest,but
certainlya greatladyherokind
of story.(harpercol/ins.com)
- MariaGinsbourg

accidental
first meetingwith
JuliaValiant,whomsheinstantly
fallsfor.Butfiguringouthowto
actuponthosefeelingswhileshe
is in hidingposesa seemingly
insurmountable
problem-a
problemthat,asthe readersoon
learns,is the leastof Rhianna's
concerns.
DarkValentine
vividly
illustrateshowbeingstalked
canroba womanof everything,
forcingthevictimto livein
constantfearof beingdiscovered.Thenovelis a quickread,
butthe messages
that Fulton
impartsleavetheirimpression
longafterthe bookis putdown.
(boldstrokesbooks.com)
- Kl

"At"Girl continued from page 56

Are you interested in pursuing acting in a
more commercial field?
I definitely am. I know people who are in the business. I've seen my share of all the movies and
TV shows about the pitfalls of the business.
But I'm not 17, with all my hopes and dreams
riding on whether I get that commercial. I
want to definitely move into more commercial
acting, but there's a certain way that's important for me to do it. I'm not going to sell stuff
that I don't believe in, or find myself in some
crazy movie just because somebody says it's a
great opportunity.
Did you gear the show toward a particular
audience?

Not really. I kind of was hoping some black brethren would come, check it out, make sure I got
it right. To the extent that I've thought about
audiences, it was always like, the biggest issue
was how much Oakland slang to put in, knowing that we want to go on the road. Would the
joke translate if I'm saying, "You feel me, hella
hyphy;' you know? So I'm like, I can't believe
I'm depending on the hyphy movement to go
national. [Laughs.]
What are your future plans for the show?
We want to take the show international. Mexico,
Canada, [particularly] Toronto. Again, really
trying to get people-because we feel like a
lot of these characters, while they are rooted in

HonorUnderSiege,Radclyffe
(BoldStrokesBooks):
This
sixthbookin the Honorseries
is unpredictable
andexplosive,
the Bay, these characters are pretty typical of
makingit the mostcomplex
black lesbians in the United States and I think
andcompelling
in the series.
right now were trying to get the national tour
CamandBlair'sstoryremains
kicked
off, so that we can see how people are
in theforefront,butwe alsoget
relating. And part of the beauty of the show
to knowCIAagentValerieRoss
is the question-and-answer period. For me, it's
betterandseeherinnerturmoil
with herlife,herjudgments
my favorite part.
and
her
past.
The
book
takes
The
question-and-answer period of the
<i.·.·,,-;--~
placein a verysmallwindow
show is real?
of time,similarto whatwe see
A lot of people think that they are [planted]. I'm
in JDRobb'sDeathbooksand
curious as to what are some of the questions
in theTVshow24. It occursin
people are going to ask. We really want to go
oneweek'stime,makingthe
Sci-FiBabyNames,Robert
to Atlanta because we think that would be a
actionfeellikereal-timeevents,
Schnakenberg
(QuirkBooks):
great
place for the show and, you know, people
andthecharacterdevelopment
Calfingall soon-to-bemommies!
are
closeted
in the South. I mean, there is a
concentrated.
HonorUnderSiege
If yougetonanelevatorand
thriving
black
lesbian community there but I
DarkValentine,
JenniferFulton usesthe eventssurrounding
think,"Beammeup,Scotty,"or
(BoldStrokes):
Thissolid,
don't know that they would talk to each other,
Sept.11,whichthe authorhas
dreamof frequenting
the barin
believable
anderoticromance
integrated
withsensitivityand
at least during the day. And that was my expeStarWars,Sci-FiBabyNames
addresses
a troublingsocialismaturity.Asanaddedbonus,
rience when I was there in the early 2000s just
is the bookfor you.Choose
suethat is largelyignoredbythe thereaderis alwaystreatedto a
really wanting to see more people come to the
from500nameslikeTrillian,
mainstream:
stalking.Themain
romance
withineveryRadclyffe
show who aren't black lesbians. And at both
ArthurDent'sloveinterestin The
character,
Rhianna
Lamb,buries tale. (boldstrokesbooks.com)
Hitchhikers
Guideto theGalaxy;
shows this past weekend, we certainly had our
heridentityandlivesunderthe
-Kl
Lara,the womanwhogavebirth
fair amount of black lesbians and we certainly
radarto escapeherstalker.
to Superman;
lnara,the beautiful
had a lot of people who didn't fit into either of
Duringthistime,shehasan
courtesan
fromFirefly;andLuna,
those categories. ■

~~~y NAMES

,,,,·,~:6)

December 2007

I65

Reviews Music Watch

Best Bets for Holiday Gifts
I

Spread the joy of these albums this year. By Margaret Coble
anism in the press, TheCon
is full of references to their
private lives and relationships with women, from
the gay marriage piano
prelude "I Was Married" to

EDITOR'S
PICK
BetterThanBlood,
MeganMcCauley
(Fly-LifeInc.):The
newalbumfromthis
Ohionativeis whatAvril
Lavignewouldsound
likeif shewasn't,you
know,fakingpunk.
McCauley's
albumis
an impressive
foray
intopop-rock.
This19year-oldchannels
the
independent
spiritof
herheroandinfluence,
JanisJoplin.Andunlike
somewannaberockers
outthere,McCauley
actuallywritesherown
songs.Theragebehind
"I'll PayYouto Shoot
Him"is inspiredbya
domesticfightbetween
herparents.(McCauley
actuallytolda copshe'd
payhimto shoother
fatherwhentheywere Just in time for your holiday gift-shopping frenzy, here are a few
calledto thescene.) sure-to-be-requested CDs that I somehow overlooked when
Thepartytune"Tap they were released earlier this year. Horse McDonald, Tegan and
That"is reminiscent
of Sara, and Laura Love are all longtime lesbian favorites, and their
Pinkandthe Donnas. latest albums do not disappoint. In fact, I'd say they are some of
Definitely
analbumthat the best albums of the ye~r.
shouldn'tbe missed.
(meganmccauley.com)
The Con, Tegan and Sara (Vapor/Sire): After the
- KatiePeoples huge success of 2004's So Jealous and 18 months of consecutive touring, Canadian out-queer twins Tegan and Sara needed
a break-from the rock-star life and from each other. So they
took their time, working up demos over the course of the next
year, and eventually teamed up with Death Cab for Curie's Chris
Walla in his Portland, Ore., studio to record this, their fifth album. The 14-track set is full of dark, introspective indie rock
songs with new wave-ish electronic flourishes, most notably
on the minimalist ';\re You Ten Years Ago?;' a Joy Division-ish
rumination on the end of a relationship. "Back in Your Head"
goes a perkier, bouncier route, musically, but lyrically still mines
anxious emotional territory regarding intimacy with a lover. The
title track is a more straight-on rocker about relationship drama,
while the teen-angst "Like 0, Like H" is an odd little tune, vacillating
between sweet melancholia and tortured outburst.
Considering that this duo doesn't much like to tout their lesbi-

66

I

curve

the hushed heartbreak of
"Call It Off" that ends the
disc. All in all, The Con is
expertly produced and flows
effortlessly from beginning
to end; it will no doubt put
the dyke twins back in the
hipster-rock spotlight again.

(teganandsara.com)

Red Haired Girl, Horse
(Kosmic): With her distinctive voice, often compared to that of Alison Moyet
and Joan Armatrading, out
Scottish singer-songwriter
Horse McDonald has been
something of a cult figure
in the States. Lesbianand women's-music fans
swooned over her 1990 album The Same Sky, particularly the
poignant "Careful;' which later gained worldwide dance club
notoriety via remixes by Sasha and Brothers In Rhythm. But
after 1993's God'sHome Movie, not much has been heard from
the singer here in the U.S. In Europe, however, she's had a
higher profile, with seven albums and eight singles released over
the past three decades. Now she's getting some well-deserved
American love via her new independent U.S. release, Red Haired
Girl,a passionate 10-track set of jazzy acoustic pop and soulful
torch songs, all remixed from her U.K. album of the same name,
which was released last year. The result is a much more cohesive
album where every song "pops:• From the upbeat opener "This
Time'' to the melancholy "Same Old, Same Old;' it's not just
Horse's emotive voice that draws you in. She can craft a flawless
pop song, too. The mesmerizing "Make Love to Me" is
-~-----·,=-•

a personal favorite, with its
combination of muted horns
and a haunting drum beat,
while the soaring"Catch My
Fall" is purportedly Horse's
own favorite from the set
and likely her first radio
single. (randan.org)

Q+A
Striptease Battleshiip
NeGrass,
Laura
Love
(Octaroon
Biography): This amazing 12,cut collection
from the quirky, queer African American funk
bassist is a concept album and period piece that
succeeds in mingling traditional bluegrass and
Negro spirituals with Love's unique storytelling
ability and musical prowess. In the liner notes,
Love explains that, like many African Americans,
she can't trace her family via official documents
beyond her grandparents, due to slavery. And so,
on this album, she offers an imagined history of
her great,grandparents' lives, starting at the end
of the Civil War, as they were freed from slav,
ery. From traditional banjo,and,fiddle bluegrass
numbers like 'John Hardy" and "Shady Grove;'
to original compositions like the album opener
"Saskatchewan (Juneteenth):' which imagines her
great,grandmother's migration from Galveston,
Texas, after receiving word of the Emancipation
Proclamation, each song sets the scene as the lis,
tener delves deeper and deeper into the emotional
lives of Love's family."Passin;' another original, is a
love story between Love's mother and father, based
around the issue of light,skin privilege and dark,
skin discrimination within the African American

Mix the sounds of the Ramones, Bikini Kill and the Breeders, then add the thought process of
the advocacy group Guerrilla Girls, and you have Striptease Battleshiip. The band includes Jena
Lacomis Garcia as vocalist, Giselle Basnuevo on drums, Didi Valencia on guitar and Omar Garcia
on bass. Together, they rock out and have a unique sound and a familial style, but who is Striptease
Batdeshiip, really:>- Lindsey]. Taylor
How long has Striptease Battleshiip been together?

Jena:I met Omar first, and we had a lot in common. He was one of the only guys who responded
well to me and wasn't like, you can't do the music thing because you're a girl. After that, he in,
traduced me to Didi and Giselle, who were both involved in other bands, and it only seemed
natural to acquire their talents and start a band.
Why the name Striptease Battleshiip?
Jena:I came up with the name with some friends of mine. We talked about how the music scene

was dominated by boys and decided to start a revolution, and after some word play we came up
with Striptease Batdeshiip because it alludes to sexuality and power, and we felt like this name
was representative of a return of that balance.
Who inspires the music of Striptease?
Basnuevo:
Bad breakups! Bikini Kill, the Police, hip,hop and anything with a heavy drum beat.
Omar:The Breeders and the Ramones.
Valencia:
That Dog, the Misfits, Mika Miko and Heavens to Betsy.
What would be your dream performance?
Basnuevo:
Travis Barker is my idol.
Jena:The Gossip and/ or Kathleen Hanna.
Valencia:
Traveling festivals all over the world would be amazing.
Omar:Madison Square Garden with the Breeders.
What do you do when you're not rocking out?
Jena:I like photography and writing.
Basnuevo:
I love drums and the ladies, which is not a bad combo!
Valencia:
I work with makeup and clothes whenever I get the chance.

Omar:If I'm not in the studio recording, then I am designing something. I am a graphic designer.
Do you have any plans to drop a CD soon?

Basnuevo:
We always have that plan ... hopefully, in a couple of months, we can make (it] happen. ■

community, while "Load Up'' is a Love,concocted
field holler like the ones slaves sang while working.
Originals like 'i\ngry Days" and "Can't Understand"
don't have any specifichistorical referencesbut none,
theless fit in with the spiritual tone of the disc, along
with the album,closing gospel throwdown "He Is
My Rock:' Truly a masterpiece from one of the
most authentic singer,songwriters in the biz today.
(lauralove.net)■

OTHER LICKS

Out of This World
The Planet podcast dishes on all things
L Word and lesbians are loving it.

BetweenDaylight
AndDark,
MaryGauthier
(LostHighway):
TheopenlylesbianLouisiana
native
offersup herfifth setof sublime
down-and-out
folk bluesandcountry noir,epitomized
bythe poignant
Hurricane
Katrinaode"Can'tFind
theWay."(marygauthier.com)

TheCoathangers
(Rob'sHouse):
Formedonthe driveto ananti-Bush
rally,thisfeministexperimental
pop-punkquartetfromAtlantais
moreirreverent
thanpolitical,with
tongue-in-cheek
screamers
like
"Don'tTouchMyShit"and"Nestle
in MyBoobies,"
alongside
dancefriendlydittieslike"Shutthe Fuck
Up."(thecoathangers.com)

Haveyouheard
about
anL Word
podcast
following
known
asthe
Kelkians?
Sounds
likesomething
straight
outofRoswell,
doesn't
It?Thenagain,
themysterious
podcasters
dolivein NewMexico.
Albuquerque,
to be exact.Known
simplyas KCand Bka,these Ober
sarcasticand uncensoredlesbians
createda podcastknownas The
Planetbreakingdowneveryepisode
of TheL Wontin Its entirety
whilesippingwine,barkingat theirdogand engagingInfriendly
flirtatiousbanterwithoneanother.AndKelkians
aroundthe world
loveeveryminuteof it - Lyndsay
O'Arcangelo
andwllycld
stal1DOdlJlllillll
on TIieL Mdl
KC:Bka mademedo it!Weslart8dpodcastingwithseasonthreeof
TheLWont.
Elka:Westartedpodcastingaothat we couldgossipaboutour
favoriteshowwithotherfans.Wedidn'texpectit to growintothe
phenomenon
It's become.

100Days100Nights,Sharon
Jones& theDap-Kings
(Daptone):
LikeAmyWinehouse,
doyou?Well,
the Dap-Kings
wereherbandon
morethanhalfof heralbum,but
showcasing
funk-queen
Sharon
Jonesis wheretheyreallyexcel.
Deepfunkfor dayshere,y'all.Turn
it up,andlet looseonthe dance
floor.(daptonerecords.
com)

Divahn
(MizRocky):
ThisNYCbasedcollectiveplaysgorgeous
anddynamicMiddleEastern
and
Sephardic
grooves,
hopingto show
themasses
thatJewishmusicgoes
beyondthe klezmerstereotype,
whilepromoting
mutualunderstanding,peaceandrespectbetween
ArabsandJews.(divahn.corrf)

DidJOUllaveany Ideatllatyouwouldgaina nationalfollowllag?
KC:Wethoughtthat we mightget 100 listeners,not20,000!And,we
havean•intematio11&1
following,•
thankyouverymuch.
Wlllcllofyauwould1118U
a......, guestCMl'ICIII'onTIieL
..,.,, Elka. KC?
KC:Elkawouldmakea betterguestcharacter.She'sa hotscientist.A
labcoatcanbe sexy,right?
Bka:DefinitelyKC.HerhairIsveryshiny.
WbatwouldJ811 1D
• 11leL 11tn1
?
KC:Ironically,
I wouldactuallyHice
maee drama(but,moreta
and steamysex9C81188).
Elka:Moreboobies.AndanothervisitfromghostDana!
..
your
clllnlcllr?
KC:Aliceand Shane.Theyseem
1hemostrelatableof the bundl.
TheirstoryUnes
seemthe mostplausible.ButJennyis the hottest

character.
Elka:I lovedTonyasomuch.I missher whitepants.

I WasJustComforting
Her,
Gretchen
Phillips(Seasick
Sailor):Austin'sGretchen
Phillips
continues
herlifelongdedication
to lezzierockwiththis eclectic
10-songdisc,largelywrittenduring
a recentstayin Parisandfilledwith
ruminations,
includinga supersweetpaeanto herlongtimelove
("Tothe LadyC").(gretchen-phillips.com)
68

I curve

YourTownTonight,
ElizaGilkyson
(RedHouse):
Finally,a liveset
fromoneofTexas'greatestmusical
treasures!Intimateandwarm,
this recording
aptlycapturesthe
folksinger'sessence,
witha setlist
spanningherthree-decade
career,
fromearlyfavoriteslike"Roseof
Sharon"to morerecentclassics
like"Requiem."
(elizagi/kyson.com)
- Margaret
Coble

Wllaldi JOUtwodo
,. .........
,
KC:Whenyousay-,OUtwo,•doyoumean
whatdowe do tDgethtJn
You~
Honestly,durtng Th8L Wontseason,
we spenda lotof
flmean1118
podcast.Wewatchthe showtwice,recordand editthe
podc8lt,respondtoli8llnersand keepouronllnecommunlllesblog,forum,MySpace-up-to-date. Notto mentionourfull-time

careers.
ThePlant1t
Podcatll
canbBfoUndat th8plan8tcaBt.blogspot.com.
ThePlanlllForumIs thep/antJ/aJst.pmbotlrds106.com.
Conlactthe
litlttJntJr
hDIJlne
at (206)203-3552.

Tech Girl

Reviews

Gadgets She'll Go Gaga For
Tech gifts for the wired folks on your list. I By Elle Kaycee
I'm not really one who loves to shop, but so much gift-giving on the brain means I get to dream a lot while I search for that I'll-know-it-when-I-see-it
something. Here's a roundup of gadgets that could be just perfect for the tech girl on your list this holiday.

Can You See Me Now?
A lot of us have families scattered around the country, if not the world, and
choosing whom to visit for the holidays is tough. With Ceiva Digital Photo
Frames with Wi- Fi, you can instantly share that look of happiness you get
while opening presents. Available in 7- or 8-inch sizes, Ceiva frames include
PicturePlan service so you can upload pictures to display instantly on other
frames connected online. Now Aunt Fanny can know just what you look like
in that new knit sweater, without having to download pies from a computer.
($175 and up, ceiva.com)

ltty Bitty USB
Even on my butchest days, I giggle over all the cute little things that now protrude from the other end of USB devices. How can you not love storage drives
like Dynamism's 128MB rubbery iDuck or the Stuffed Hippo with a heart on its
side? USBgeek's Penguin Mouse is also sure to tickle someone's silly side. If you
have a more high-class woman on your list, try the Swarovski-encrusted Active
Crystals line of storage drives from Philips.A line of Active Crystals headphones
is also available.($15 and up, dynamism.com, usbgeek.com, active-crystals.com)

A Pack of iPicks
Apple certainly has given us plenty of options for the musically inclined on
our gift lists. Whether it's an iPod Classic, a Shuffie •in a new color, a fatty
Nano or the iPhone-without-a-phone iPod Touch, there's a bushel of options
to pick from. Sure, she may already have an iPod, but with its increased storage
capacity, and more colors in the rainbow, maybe it's time for another one.
($79 to $399, apple.com)

For the Laser-Loving Lesbo

From top down: Ceiva Digital
Photo Frame with Wi-Fi, USSGeek's Penguin Mouse, Philips'
Active Crystals Storage Drive, the •
iPod Touch and a range of iPods.

I'd be lying if I said the Celluon Laserkey CL800BT made a great first
impression. I laughed at what I thought would be an ultimately uselessalbeit unique-keyboard.
But the chuckles stopped once I considered its
flexibility.This small, wireless box can provide a full-size keyboard for laptops,
smart phones or PD As. It's capable of projecting its red laser keys onto any flat
surface, and its response to finger movement is surprisingly quick and accurate.
(price to be announced, celluon.com) ■

December 2007

I

69

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Top Ten ReasonsWe Love CourtneySloane

5. She'sa self-madewoman."I built the business
furniture piece by furniture piece and room by
room;' she says about the beginning of her firm.
Sloane worked her way through the designing
ranks, working for Formica Corporation before
breaking out on her own.

6. Yep,she'sa lesbian.Not that it matters, to her
or us. "I view myself as a citizen of the world;' she
says. "I don't necessarily identify myself purely by
my sexuality. What I bring to the project is me,
and that is who I am:'

7. She'sa writer,too!Sloane got her start in media
working as a contributing editor and columnist for
Essence magazine, where her monthly column, "By

Design;' dispensed advice and information. She's
also been featured in two books, How You Livin'
and Designers of Color. She even describes interior
design as a form of storytelling."ln essence, I'm creating a story for (th~ client] that becomes more of
a space or an environment;' she says."! like to think
of myself as a storyteller, but in a physical space:•
Courtney Sloane, founder of Alternative Design
(AD), is one of the country's leading designers
and her influence can be seen most prominently in
hip-hop culture thanks to a roster of A-list clients.
When she founded AD in 1993, hip-hop was
emerging as a powerhouse in pop culture-and
Sloane was at the helm when its influence went
worldwide. Her company has grown immensely.
in 14 years and her client base is hugely diverse.
She does high-end home and office design, commercial design and set design for hot TV shows
like Americas Next Top Model. It seems there's no
stopping this stylish heavy hitter. - Katie Peoples

1. She'sversatile.Sloane has designed everything,
from watches to furniture. Her style is a mix of
high-tech and soft touch. She combines modern
style with African and Asian accents. She's created
the lobby at Vibe magazine, a music studio at Sony
and interiors at Disney, among other things.

"In essence,I'm creatinga story... that becomes

moreof a space or an environment... I liketo thinkof
myselfas a storyteller,
but in a physicalspace."
2002. Sloane was named one of the "emerging designers of the millennium" by the Decorating and
Design Building.

3. She;saccessible:Don't let her place in the
Harnptons or the fact that her clients are celebs
fool you. Sloane is down-to-earth, doing educational specials on HGTV and TLC and offering
design advice for magazines like Seventeen. She
also offers Total Design Prescription, which gives
commercial customers one-on-one help with their
design woes, and Group Therapy, educational sessions held at the AD studios for groups of commercial customers.

8. She's a smarty-pants.
Sloane was educated
at Rutgers University, the Fashion Institute of
Technology and Pratt Institute. She also spent plenty of time simply observing other people create
things-from cabinets to fabrics-in order to learn
how things were made. The experience gave her a
better understanding of her future as a designer.

9. She'sa homebody.
Sloane likes to take time
to live and move in whatever space she's decorating-especially if it's her own. "I like to do more
experimental things that I may or may not do with
clients;' she says. "My place is like a laboratory:'

10.She'sfocusedonyou.Sloane wants her clients
2. Hercompanyis oneof the top designfirmsin
NewYorkCity.AD has made a name for itself as
the go-to shop for hip-hop style, but also made the
House Beautiful Top 101 designer's list for three
consecutive years and Home Design magazine's
Top 100 best architects and decorators list in

121curve

4. She'sworkedwith QueenLatifah.And Diddy.
And Jay-Z. And BET, Essence, Sony Music and
Viacom. Sloane's big break came in 1993 when
she decorated Latifah's house. Ever since, Sloane's
been at the forefront of hip-hop style and design
and her influence on them is immeasurable.

to be as involved as possible. She does extensive
interviews on what they want, and tries to bring
out their personality as much as possible. But it
goes both ways."They've got to be willing to go the
distance because it is as much their responsibility
as it is yours:' ■

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Queer Lounge
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For 2008 sponsorship opJ:?
please contact Phil at (323)
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