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Description
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ToC The Real JT Leroy by Diane Anerson-Minshall (p30); Cover: The L Word's Rose Rollins by Rachel Shatto (p42); Urban Guerrilla (p46); Eight Green Cars for '09 by Evelyn Block (p48); Calendar Girls by Rachel Shatto (p50); LGBT Teens on the Streets by Kristen V. Brown (p52); City Slickers by Melissa Fondakowski (p33); Australian Paradise by Jen Berkowitz (p34); Flying High in Mexico & Florida by Aimsel L. Ponti and Jess Jones (p36); California Dreamin' by Catherine Plato (p38); I Love the Nightlife in Paris by Lynn Breedlove (p40); Hippie Soaks in Oregon by Aislinn Clevenger (p41). Cover and Outtake Photos by Tony Donaldson.
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Travel Issue
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issue
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2
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Date Issued
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March 2009
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Format
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PDF/A
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Publisher
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Frances Stevens
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Identifier
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Curve_Vol19_No2_March-2009_0CR_PDFa.pdf
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extracted text
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PROPERTY
OF:
Our ONTHEsffHF
~ WWW.OUTONTHESHE
LF.C
sweet
•
art
NOVEMBER 8-15, 2009
Aboard the Norwegian lipirit
featuring
SUZANNE
WESTENHOEFER,
TER,ERIN FOLEY,EDIE CARE
's NAT & MEG AND MORE
Join us
for the largest
lesbian cruise ever!
From New Orlea11s, we sail to gorgeous Costa
Maya, Mexico, fabulous Belize City, Belize,
scuba ana snorkel'ng wonderlard
Roatan,
Honduras, and stunn ng Cozumel, Mexico.
Frolick on the white sand beaches, shake
your groove thing, sooil yourself at tne
deluxe spa a'1d laugh with your new friends.
Whatever you do, it's sure to be swee+.
Ask about our free
,nonthly pay,nent plan!
I FRANKLY
SPEAKING
Got Spring Fever?
curve
THE BEST-SELLING
MARCH 2009
I
LESBIAN MAGAZINE
VOLUME 19 NUMBER 2
Publisher and Founder Frances Stevens
EDITORIAL
Editor in Chief Diane Anderson-Minshall
Managing Editor Katie Peoples
Assistant Editor Rachel Beebe
Book Review Editor Rachel Pepper
Music Review Editor Margaret Coble
Contributing Editors Julia Bloch, Victoria A. Brownworth,
Gina Daggett, Sheryl Kay, Gretchen Lee, Stephanie Schroeder,
Rachel Shatto
Copyeditor Katherine Wright
Editorial Assistants Kim Bale, Ainsley Drew, Mary Foulk, LaKeisha
Hughes, Nina Lary, Rachel Lastra, Anna Lonnberg, Heather
Robinson, Fernanda Silva
PUBLISHING
Advertising Sales Diana L. Berry, Rivendell Media
Social Networking Lindy Shelton
Magazine publishers pay a lot of lip service to the environment but face it,
magazines themselves are often a big drain on natural resources. At curve,
we've been printed on partially recycled paper for years and we recycle
almost everything at the office, but since we're all a bunch of ecochicks we've
wanted to find some way to really reduce our environmental impact and
still afford to do business (sadly, soy inks and even more low-impact paper
costs even more). So we've changed the size of the magazine, which you may
not even notice ( unless you compare it to our old issues). But just that little
change will save about 20,000 pounds of paper-and
lower our usage of
energy, transportation fuel and inks.
We're doing a bit of recycling on our cover too, the best kind though. We
were so enamored of Rose Rollins, the butchy tough Army veteran from The
L Word who graced our cover last spring, that we asked her to come back
again. As one of the few female vets on a regular TV series, Rollins has a
tough task in wartime. That she gets to cozy up to Leisha Hailey, one of the
sexiest lesbians alive, probably makes it a little bit easier.
For our annual travel issue we wanted to do something different. We know
that despite the recession, lesbians are still traveling more than their non-gay
counterparts. But we're savvy sisters, so we want more bang for our buck.
We chose a few off-the-beaten-path destinations that won't break the bank.
In Cairns, you can snorkel the Great Barrier Ree£ visit the jungle and stay
at a hostel that's as nice as a hotel. In Oregon, you can soak at a world-class
spa, find your emotional center and keep prices down to three digits. From
Florida to Mexico to California, we have quick and easy trips you'll be dying
to read about. Even better, artist and musician Lynn Breedlove chronicled a
whirlwind trip through Paris' lesbian nightclub scene that had everyone at
our office itching to find a cheap flight on Travelocity to France.
We hope you have time to find some travel escapes of your own this year. If
you find something amazing, email us and tell us all about it.
ART
/PRODUCTION
Art Director Stefanie Liang
Photo Editors Nicole Arseneault, Hayley McMillen
Production Manager Ondine Kilker
Production Artist Kelly Nuti
Web Producer Nikki Woelk
Photo Assistants Katy Gross, Kasey Neuenschwander
CONTRIBUTING
WRITERS
Kathy Beige, Kelsy Chauvin, Jennifer Corday, Lyndsey
D'Arcangelo, Michele Fisher, Tania Hammidi, Kathi lsserman,
Gillian Kendall, Kate Lacey, Charlene Lichtenstein, Karlyn Lotney,
Candace Moore, Alison Peters, Catherine Plato, Aimsel L. Ponti,
Laurie K. Schenden, Erin Siegal, Kristin A. Smith, Dave Steinfeld,
Edie Stull, Jocelyn Voo, Melany Walters-Beck
CONTRIBUTING
ILLUSTRATORS
& PHOTOGRAPHERS
Paul Michael Aguilar, Michelle Bart, Erica Beckman, Phil Cho,
Cheryl Craig, Tony Donaldson, Sophia Hantzes, Gabriela Hashun,
Cassandra Olander, Maggie Parker, Faye Sadou, Elisa Shebaro,
Katherine Streeter, Kina Williams, Misty Winter
1550 Bryant Street, Suite 510
San Francisco, CA 94103
Phone (415) 863-6538 Fax (415) 863-1609
Advertising Sales (415) 863-6538 ext. 1O or (212) 446-6700
Subscription Inquiries (818) 286-3102
Advertising Email advertising@curvemag.com
Editorial Email editor@curvemag.com
Letters to the Editor Email letters@curvemag.com
Volume 19 Issue 2 Curve (ISSN 1087-867)() is published monthly (except for bimonthly
January/February and July/August) by Outspoken Enterprises. Inc., 1550 Bryant St.,
Ste. 510, San Francisco, CA 94103. Subscription price: $49.95/year, $62.95 Canadian
(U.S. funds only) and $71.95 international (U.S. funds only). Returned checks will be assessed
a $25 surcharge. Periodicals pcstage paid at San Francisco, CA 94114 and at additional
mailing offices (USPS 0010-355). Contents of Curve Magazine may net be reproduced In any
manner, ertherwhole or in part, Without wntten permission from the publisher. Publicationof
the name or photograph of any persons or organizations appeanng, advertising or listing In
Curve may net be taken as an Ind1cationof the sexual orientation of that individual or group
unless specifically stated. Curve welcomes letters, queries. unsolicited manuscripts and
artwork. Include SASE for respcnse. Lack of any representation only signifies insufficient
materials. Submissions cannot be returned unless a self-addressed stamped envelope is
included. No respcns,bility is assumed for loss or damages. The contents do net necessarily
represent the opinions of the edrtor. unless specffically stated. AJImagazines sent discreetly.
Subscnption Inquiries: Please wnte to Curve, 1550 Bryant Street, Suite 510. San Francisco,
CA 94103, email shop@curvemag.com, or call 818-286-3102. Canadian Agreement
Number: 40793029. Postmaster:SendGanadianaddresschangesto shop@curvemag.com.
Curve.
PO Box 122, Niagara Falls, ON L2E 6S8. Send U.S. addresschangesto shop@curvemag.com.
Curve.PO Box 17138,N. Hollywood,CA 91615-7138.PrintedIn the U.S.
curvemag.com
21curve
Features MARCH2009
30
2
The Real JT Leroy
Queer author Savannah Knoop tells us her
side of one of literature's greatest hoaxes. By
Diane Anderson-Minshall
The L Word's Rose Rollins
It's time to say goodbye to Tasha. Rollins looks
backward and forward. By Rachel Shatto
46
Urban Guerrilla
Dyke fashion never looked so good.
48
Eight Green Cars for '09
We've got hot rides that'll turn heads and save
the planet. By Evelyn Block
50
Calendar Girls
Hot female mechanics turn the girly calendar
on its head. We like it. By Rachel Shatto
52
LGBT Teens on the Streets
Homeless queer youth in New York City struggle
to find a place to call home. By Kristen \I. Brown
33
Vacations
YouCanAfford
City Slickers
34
Australian Paradise
36
Flying High in Mexico & Florida
38
40
4
4
I curve
Find your inner cowgirl on a backcountry
horse drive. By Melissa Fondakowski
Get the sun, the sand and the Great Barrier
Reef in Cairns. By Jen Berkowitz
Parasailing lets you see a whole lot more.
By Aimsel L. Ponti and Jess Jones
California Dreamin'
Who needs the Mediterranean when you can
go to Santa Barbara? By Catherine Plato
I Love the Nightlife in Paris
Find out where to go to find the lesbian
scene in France. By Lynn Breedlove
Hippie Soaks in Oregon
Nothing beats a good old-fashioned spa
getaway and Breitenbush does it best.
By Aislinn Clevenger
"Itwas sucha great experience...
But it'sdefinitelytime for it to end.
I mean, it's been sixyears,and
it's betterto go out on a highnote
than to go out becauseno one is
watchingit." Rose Rollins >> page 42
Departments MARCH2009
Advice
Relationships: How to survive your first
Frankly Speaking
lesbian cruise-relationship
Letters
Health: Lesbian health through the ages.
What are your risks in your 20s, 30s, 40s?
Contributors
This Is What a Lesbian Looks Like
Open Studio
Out in Front
AstroGrrl
intact.
Dyke Drama
Fifty ways to leave your lover? Here's one.
Politics
Hello? Is it ever going to be about us?
Scene
Lipstick & Dipstick
Fairy Butch
Top Ten Reasons We Love ...
Entertainment Reviews
Music: Hot country tunes from Lee Ann
Womack and Lucinda Williams. Prima
J gets our props. A Q&A with guitarist
Ronnda Cadle.
Books: A butch cookbook, Alison
Curvatures
A shoemaker, divas we love and a book
about beautiful female bodies. Oh, and a
few chicks who ping our gaydar this month.
Celebrity Gossip
Lisa Alvarez is so hot, Jackie Warner is on
the make, Melissa speaks out and Brooke
gabs about Grey's Anatomy.
Bechdel, 37 days to inspiration, a oneon-one with illustrator Liz Baillie and a
children's book about a tyke who likes
dresses.
6
Film: Wanda Sykes, The L Word, Queen
Raquela,vampires, a new karate kid and up
close and personal with Traci Dinwiddie.
Tech: Get your game on with FableII.
Caffyn Kelley explains her QueerMaps and
SheWired goes live.
0
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Icurve
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LETTERS
great to be able to read my magazine anywhere I want and at any time I want without the fear of turning over a page to reveal
#1), I really enjoyed the sections that were
pictures of various dildos and other
aimed at the girls who are just
adult toys. I found this to be a huge
coming out. As a "newbie" myself,
problem with my last magazine of
it helps to read other testimonials
choice and it ruins the general readand get tips and advice from those
ing experience. I won't name names.
who have already been through
I find curve such a refreshit (as I'm sure you know).
ing read and totally loved
To see that in the magathe December 2008 issue
zine was awesome and I
(Vol. 18 #10) with Heather
hope you have more of it
Matarazzo
on the cover.
in future issues! Thanks!
Which Show Most
She's
come
a
long way since
-Jessica Lindsey,
Deserves a Lesbian
Welcome to the Dollhouse!
Raleigh, N.C.
Character?
-Amanda C., Kildare,
Ireland
Th nks Ladi s'
44% CSl(above)
I'm taking a little minute
16% Heroes
Correction
out of my busy workday to
The correct webdrop you a line. Just wanted
15% GossipGirl
site address for
to say thank you so much.
Sarah Kramer's
I wrote in recently after
13% Lost
vegan cookbook,
having discovered curve.
13% UglyBetty
Vegan A Go-Go!, listed in
Straight away I got a subour December Gift Guide, is
scription, which by the way
According
to a
is excellent value! It's so
Go Vegan.net.
curvemag.com
poll
Note from a N wbie
In the most recent issue of curve (Vol. 19
Poll
?
I usually love Lipstick and Dipstick, but their
December column, "Under the Mistletoe"
(Vol. 18 #10), was very disappointing. The
lesbian community should be trying to break
down judgments against queers and women,
not encourage them. They told one fan she
deserved to be slapped and avoided, essentially because she suggested that lesbians
are capable of casual sex. (Some aren't, but
I shouldn't have to tell you we're as diverse
as any group!) Then, a teenager asked how
she might have her first orgasm, and instead
of giving simple advice (hello, masturbation!)
they spent the whole "response" making fun of
her sexual experience and telling her that once
she has "meaningful sex" (another insulting
assumption) she'll either get there or need to
go to a doctor. What is with this misinformation, harsh judgment of female sexuality and
support of lesbian stereotypes? This is what
we turn to curve over Cosmo to avoid.
-Deb Johnson, Tucson, Ariz.
Thank you, Lipstick and Dipstick, for the
advice you gave Itchy in Illinois, "Do You
Know Your Lingo?" in the November issue
[Vol. 18 #9). I'm 27 and am just coming out
and was told by a friend of mine that all the
rainbow tees, jewelry and car decals were
a bit much. While I do want to meet the
right woman, I had no idea where to begin.
Dipstick's bar idea was a little scary but I've
listened to Lipstick about networking and
I've met a few new friends. Thanks.
-Baby Lezzie,Jacksonville, Fla.
s j curve
Long Live Cherrie Moraga!
In our Decemberissue[Vol.18 #10],we made a grave error and misquotedLenelle
Mo'iseas callingthe award-winningwriterCherrfeMoraga (picturedbelow)"the
late CherrfeMoraga."How this happenedis stillup for debate in the Editorial
Department(No. 1 excuse:lack of caffeine),but it goes withoutsayingthat we're
all more than embarrassedaroundhere. Pleasedon't take away our rainbow
passes!Below is the letterwe receivedfrom Mo'iseclearingup the mistake.
AlthoughI am honoredto be featured in your December 2008 issue("It'sStory
Time,"page 53), I was shockedand disturbedto discovera glaringtypo in the
last paragraphof the publishedQ&A. I was misquotedas citing "the late Cherrie
Moraga"as one of my many influences.
I must informyou that-much to my delight-the great poet, playwright,teacher,
feministand LGBTQactivistCherrfeMoraga is thrivingand very much alive!In
fact, in April2008, I gentlygreeted her at the New WORLD Theater'sCreative
Uprising(s)conference.She is a livinglegend,one of my artisticheroes.
Needlessto say,as a poet, I am very carefulwith my words. I
was disappointedto find myselfinaccuratelyquoted, spreading misinformation,in your internationallydistributedmagazine.
Yoursin the strugglefor accuracy,
Lene/leMoise
Northampton,Mass.
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CONTRIBUTORS
From the
Editor
As we were busy
f
"From the moment I met Inguna Skuja and Melissa Braden,
I knew this couple was extraordinary;' says editorial assistant
Mary Foulk,who wrote about them on page 16. "Passionate
and prolific, they sizzle in person and on the page. What an
honor it was to interview them and learn more about their
sensual art and dynamic collaboration:' A writer and an educator, Foulk lives in Portland, Ore., with her wife and their
son. Her work has appeared in Mombian, Lesbian Life at
About.com, Hip Mama, the New York Times, Activistas, Whos
Your Mama: The Voices of Unsung Women and Mothers (Soft Skull Press) and VoiceCatcher3.
When not devouring the latest lesbian news and gossip or stalking her favorite queer artists,
she enjoys exploring the incredible views of the Pacific Northwest, critiquing lesbian movies
and attempting to read something ocher than anxiety-provoking parenting guides.
putting this issue
together-literally
the second day of
the new year-we
all had resolutions
on our minds. Katie
wants to start saving money on a monthly basis
(no more lattes!). Stefanie wants
to call her parents more than
once a month. Diana has sworn
off dating (we'll see how long
Editorial assistant LaKeishaHughesloves to snuggle up with a
good book while drinking Thai tea, listening to rock music and
writing poetry on the side. "I remember the first time that I read
curve. I was 14 years old;' Hughes recalls. "Back then, I was a
young teenage girl coming into my sexuality and trying to find
a way to tell my mother that I was a lesbian. I went to Barnes &
Noble and picked up the May 1999 issue, with Ellen DeGeneres
and her mom. Right after reading that issue, I came out of the
closet and became an avid reader of curve. I told myself chat I
would write for them one day, and here I am:'
that lasts). And me? I want to
travel to more exotic locales
(not just the Chinese restaurant
near my office). I'd be happy,
too, to just take more road trips
in the U.S .. Photographer Sarah
Lyons took a road trip I surely
envy: the Kentucky-based
lenswoman went cross-country
Since she was a child people have been asking editorial assistant
RachelLastra"What's wrongt To which she generally replies,
"Nothing. My face just settles this waY:' Lastra is a poet and an
aspiring novelist who quit her boring office job for the chance to
work at curve. When she isn't tapping away at a keyboard, you
can usually find her with her nose in a book or watching a truly
appalling amount of reality television. Her best curve memory?
Interviewing pop star Lady Gaga for curvemag.com. "It was hilarious;' she says, "She kept comparing herself to Andy Warhol:' What's next on the horizon?
"Paying off my student loans ... and writing the Great American Novel, of course:' Look for
one of her poems in the January issue of Cherry Bleeds, a literary magazine.
shooting pictures of hot female
mechanics, many of them
lesbian. We've printed just a
tiny selection in
our auto section.
Cool cars, hot
chicks. What's
not to envy
there? Maybe
she'll take me
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Originally from Santa Fe, N.M., photo assistant KatyGrossmoved
to San Francisco last September. When the economy crashed,
and she couldn't find a full-time job, working at curve was one
of the few things that kept her going. Gross has been doing photography since she was 14. Her documentary photo projects have
allowed her to meet some very interesting people, including ghost
hunters in Maine and newspaper vendors in Santa Fe. Postcurve, she plans to go back co school to gain some more media
skills before she tries, for a second time, to enter the real world.
on the next trip. Check out her
photos on page 50. Are you
drooling, too?
Diane Anderson-Minshall
Editor in Chief
March 2009
I9
curvatures
Arizona Designer's Happy Feet
It's no wonder Tamera Lyndsay has a legion of rock
girl fans like Joan Jett and Annie Lennox: She played
bass in D.C:s first all-girl band, Chalk Circle. But,
since 1993, Tamera Lyndsay, out owner and designer
of Wilma Accessories, Ltd., has been producing
high-end, custom-made shoes, bringing the art of
European shoe- and boot-making stateside. Her fun
and impressive designs wowed lesbians after an appearance on The L Word's fourth season.
Lyndsay hails from the East Village art scene,
where she was a leader in the '80s high-design move-
ment, producing her own millinery and accessory
lines. After an apprenticeship in bootmaking
with craftsman Bob McLean, Lyndsay launched
Wilma Accessories. She found that few design
schools offered training in shoemaking, so, while
she was apprenticing, she worked in a shoe repair
shop to learn everything she could about shoes and
get the foundation she needed to begin designing
them.
It was this dearth of training available inspired
Lyndsay to buy up antique shoemaking equipment from eBay and establish The Shoe College at
Wilma Accessories, Ltd. Beginners and advanced
shoemakers come to the college from around the
world and from a variety of backgrounds to learn
classic shoemaking. Lyndsay, who calls her own
aesthetic "Functional, elegant, rugged, intelligent;'
says The Shoe College is defined by its emphasis on the
basic technical and artistic aspects of shoemaking.
In addition to teaching, Lyndsay continues
to work as a designer, producing beautiful leatherbound books, high-end stationery, custom-made
upholstery, furniture and ( a fave among her lesbian
fans) rockin' wrist wallets. [MeaChavez]
SOMETHING'S
FISHYHERE
Don'tbefooledbythe fishy
exterior.Koo-KiSushiis
Belgianchocolatehand
formedintooddlycutesushi
shapes.Getthe multi-piece
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Kanpai!sakecupfor those
dayswhenthe hungerinside
youdemandssomethingout
of the ordinary.Butbeware,
it faresas badlyin the sun
as the realthing-ours
meltedintoa brightlycoloredlumpwhenwe left it
nearthe windowonebright
day.($5andup,kookisushi.com)[RachelBeebe]
Diva Delights
Resolving
to getfit againthisyear?Well,at leastlooksmokin'while
doingit.You'lltunein,getinspired,lookdapperandbefoxywithour
topspringtime
sportspicks.Theseitemsarefunctionalenoughto work
outin,yetstylishenoughfor pickingupthe hotties.[AnnaLonnberg]
Puta springin your
stepwhilelistening
to yourworkoutbeats
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AudioBeanie.It hasbuilt-in
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($70,columbia.com)
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Super-stylish
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A perfectmarriage,
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We usually leave diva worship to gay
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Slip'em onandshow
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harbingerfitness.com)
of the '70s and earty '80s has a great
Sapphic twist and includes LIiy Tomlin
(pictured), Pat Carrol (of Gertrude Stein
fame) and my geeky favorite, Carrie
boys, but Divas (Universe), a beautiful
book of photographs by After Darlc's
Kenn Duncan, was hard to resist. The
gorgeous photos of infamous women
Fisher. These beautiful and playful photos should not be missed. [KatiePeoples]
March 2009
I 11
the rundown
Grab your Dramamine and sunscreen
because RSVPCruises
has announced that
it will have five all-gay cruises this year,
which include destinations in the Eastern
Caribbean and the
Mexican Riviera ...
It turns out the
global recession
doesn't hurt so
much if you' re a
retailer of trans
fashions. Canadian
retailer Geniethe
Crossdress
Storehas
actually seen an increase in sales, presumably due to the fact that they serve a niche
market ... Actor JadaPinkettSmithhas admitted that she "enjoyed" playing a lesbian
in the recent mediocre box office offering
The Women. "I wish I could have been
more of a lesbian
in the movie;' the
Matrix Reloaded
star added. We
do too ... Want to
fulfill that dream
of going to grad
school, but aren't sure how you can possibly afford it? Check out the new series,
Grad School Finances, from the LGBToriented finance blog Queercents
...
According to a recently released GLAAD
poll, 64 percentof adults in the United
States favor allowing openly gay people
to serve in the military, and 69 percentoppose laws that ban same-sex couples from
adopting children ... Two women were arrested and imprisoned for a month while
visiting Dubaiafter they were seen engaging in the "indecent" act of kissing each
other in public ... Former Greys Anatomy
star Isaiah Washington, who made headlines in 2007 when he was fired from the
show for making homophobic comments
about one of his costars, has criticized
ABC for firing actor Brooke Smith, who
played an openly lesbian character on the
show. "I think it's disgusting;' the actor
said in an interview with TV Guide...
ShilohJolie-Pitt,Brad Pitt and Angelina
Jolie's 2-year-old daughter, is exploring her gender identity. Pitt told Oprah
Winfrey, "She only wants to be called
John. John or Peter:' [RachelLastra]
12Icurve
Our Lady Parts, Ourselves
Tired of seeing our most special lady parts portrayed as either
explicitly sexual or prudishly clinical, and rarely as something
"sacred, special and worthy of respect"? Art director Teresa
Giamos and out photographer Louise Broussard of Dallas have
set out to change all that, with their coffee table book, Woman.
The project was born of a conversation between Giamos
and her sister about how women view their bodies. "Most women
are unaware of the appearance of their genitalia, and are taught
that [they are] considered dirty and utilitarian, which results in a
cultural and societal taboo that commands that it not be seen ...
my desire was to counter that specific taboo," says Giamos.
Giamos and Broussard met through a fellow photographer.
Broussard quickly fell in love with Giamos' idea of women (including those that are intersex or transgender) expressing themselves
through portraits taken in a way that allowed the subject to find beauty in a part of
her body that she might not perceive as beautiful. "We wanted it to be a softer, prettier way for the women to relate, and feel good about the picture [we] were taking.
And even be able to put it up on their wall if they want," Broussard says.
The project has been a powerful experience for Giamos, a sexual abuse survivor, who grew up with the belief that her vagina was something to feel ashamed of.
"While photographing these women, I have come to better understand the vagina's
intricacies and ultimate beauty. It really is a wonderful part of who we are as
females. The book is helping me see this," she says. [RachelShatto]
The Gaydar
Here's a taste of lesbians in pop culture this month.
Who missed the mark and who was right on target?
MTV'sDouble
Shotat love.
Fauxbisexual
twins?Asif MTV
neededto get
skankier.
Only in San Francisco
You'llhave so many new storiesto tell, you'll need proof.Findout what's new in SFat onlyinsanfrancisco.com/gaytravel
gay.
®
Sheraton
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THE L
LRY COLLECTION
ST REGIS
WESTIN
PHOTOS PROVIDED BY (TOP ROW) CASTRO: ALAN SO CHINAGATE GIRLS: GOLDEN GATE BUSINESS ASSOCIATION LOVE MOMS: DEBORAH 0. LATTIMORE (MIDDLE ROW) COIT TOWER: ZACHARY BRUNS
SMILING WOMEN: DEBORAH 0. LATTIMORE FOLSOM WOMAN: FRAN KALERT (BOTTOM ROW) GOLDEN GATE BOYS: GOLDEN GATE BUSINESS ASSOCIATION HAIGHT LEGS: ALAN SO DYKES ON BIKES: R GERHARTER
LESBOFILE
GirlsTalkingBack
Warner warms up and Etheridge tells it like it is. By Jocelyn Voo
Girlfriend? Special lady friend? You are gonna have to help me here because I am not
sure what to call her now;' MelissaEtheridge
blogged on The Daily Beast. "Anyways, she
and I are not allowed the same right under
the state constitution as any other citizen.
0 K, so I am taking that to mean I do not
have to pay my state taxes because I am
not a full citizen. I mean that would just be
wrong, to make someone pay taxes and not
give them the same rights, sounds sort oflike
that taxation without representation thing
from the history books:'
After Jackie Warner's
verbal gaffe on Work
Out last year, which
cost the show at least
one major sponsor,
Bravo execs are anxious to up their ratingswith more sex appeal, of course. According
to gossip queen JanetCharlton,
Warner was
told to get a hotter girlfriend, so Warner
tried to chat up filmmaker LisaAlvarez.
"Lisa
didn't seem terribly interested, so Jackie
invited her to her birthday party at Club
11, and insisted on posing for photos with
her;' Charlton reports. "Jackie was annoyed
because Lisa brought a date to the party, but
she's not giving up and continues to pursue
Lisa:' Alvarez, however, denies that there's
anything between the two, telling curve,
'Jackie and I are just friends. That little kiss
was just posed for a photographer friend of
ours that egged it on just for fun. We were just
having dinner to discuss the Bravo network.
After all... two tops do not make a bottom:'
The Bravo-ratings theory might also
explain why Warner was spotted at the '08
Pride parade frolicking about town with actor
CatherineKeener's
Sapphic little sis, Elizabeth
14
I curve
Keener,
aka Dawn on The L Word.
"We were told that Jackie broke up with
her bartender girlfriend, BrianaStockton,
who
works at Club 11, on Tuesday, and that same
night was seen passionately making out with
Elizabeth on the sidewalk;' Charlton writes.
"In the last few days, Jackie and Elizabeth
also turned up at Republic and the Abbey,
holding hands and looking very affectionate:'
Warner's really working it out this season!
OneStepForward,
OneStepBack
Nov. 4, 2008, was the historic day when
Barack Obama became the first African
American to be elected president of the
United States. However, there was a somber
tinge to that significant day when California,
Arizona and Florida all passed propositions
that said these states would not recognize
same-sex marriages.
EllenDeGeneres,
who wed PortiaDeRossi,
released a statement saying that she was
"saddened beyond belie£ Here we just had a
giant step toward equality and then on the
very next day, we took a giant step away:'
Taxation
WithoutRepresentation
"So my wife, uh, I mean, roommate?
Doesa BodyGood
Consider this anecdote a dispatch from the
Department of WTF: Madonna'sbrother
Christopher Ciccone, who has released his
tell-all book Life With My Sister Madonna,
revealed that he once went out partying with
his sis and DemiMoore,who ended up getting
more than a bit rowdy. According to The Sun,
Ciccone recalled, "We went out and Demi
was dancing up on me and humping me from
behind. She was lactating at the time and
she was squirting breast milk at my lesbian
friends. My friend Michelle called me the
next morning and asked me: 'How do I get
breast milk out of my black dress?'
"I replied: 'How the fuck would I know?
Call Demi!'"
5
Maybe,MaybeNot
~
"I think it's pretty obvious who I'm seeing," l
Lindsay Lohan told Harper's Bazaar-in ~ ,
?
case anyone's been living in a cave for the ~
past year and hasn't heard about her and ~
SamanthaRonson."I think it's no shock to c
anyone that it's been going on for quite some
1
time ... She's a wonderful person and I love ~
her very much:' But despite her candor, she ~
clammed up when it came to her past-and, )
it seems, her future. When asked if she'd pre- f
viously been with a girl, Lohan responded, "I t
don't know, maybe:• She said that she doesn't '.1consider herself a lesbian. But a bisexual?
"Maybe:' Wait, we thought this was an inter- view with Lohan, not TilaTequila.
■
She Said
g
e
er
IS
a,
h
g
n,
d
n
n
e
d
0
e
e
e
't
r-
I OPENSTUDIO
Clockwise from left: "Riga Isn't
Finished Yet! Ill"; "Dancing Girls";
"Double Portrait"; "Alien Nation";
"Serene Reflection"
The LesbiansFromLatvia
Artists lnguna Skuja and Melissa Braden are going home again. By Mary Foulk
w
a
bi
h
The Latvian ceramic artist Inguna Skuja was already a celebrity back in 1999 when she and her partner, Melissa Braden,
started working together. Skuja had been voted one of the
sexiest women in Latvia by Klub magazine. "I had heard
that 'the Lesbian' was coming," Skuja laughs, remembering
the pair's first meeting. The couple fell in love when Braden
was studying at Riga's Art Academy. Since then, Skuja and
Braden-who is originally from Sacramento, Calif.-have
collaborated as the artistic duo Skuja Braden.
Their talents drew them together. "I had never seen
anything like (Inguna's ceramics] and I thought it was the
most incredibly beautiful work I'd ever seen;' Braden says.
"We understood each other's thinking ... [and)
had very similar tastes:' Because of the language
barrier, the couple learned to communicate in alternative ways. "I don't know how we did it because Inguna's English was so bad at the time;' recalls Braden. "Some of our most successful pieces
are actually rooted in the space between understanding and misunderstanding:'
Passionate and prolific, the artists have
crafted an extensive body of work. Memories of
Latvia and the Baltic region permeate their pieces,
as well as a vital celebration of women's sensual-
ity and eroticism. Zen Buddhism has also had a profound
influence on their process, and on their growth as artists.
But what's a lesbian to do when she's dating the Latvian
equivalent to Angelina Jolie:' She dives in head first, but
not without consequences. Many gay people are closeted
in Latvia. Homophobia persists, and the couple has dealt
with both verbal and physical harassment. In 2001 they
moved to California so that they could live more freely as a
couple. They subsequently moved to Oregon and, despite
their fears about being marginalized and going back into
the closet, they moved back to Riga in January.
Skuja and Braden have been unable to get married,
so they have been left with few options. In fact, many of
their recent pieces deal with the problems surrounding the
institution of marriage and the fight for equal rights for gay
couples. "The thing that kind of sucks, being a bi-national
couple, is the whole having to pick up and go all the time ...
it's really important, actually, for artists to be in the same
place for a long period of time. But then, we have this theory that maybe in the long run it will be better ... it gives us
insights into both of our cultures in a way that if we weren't
living this life, it wouldn't be possible to see these kinds of
connections and misconnections. If you never live in each
other's country, you will never understand that person:' ■
ar
es
m
pe
d
a
Fa
se
K
ev
w
a
16
I curve
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x gift subscriptions, call (800) 705-0070 or (818) 760-8983. curvemag.com
m the Broward
hes Ordinance with the
1 orientation clause chat
ay men and lesbians in
:nt and places of pubThe revised ordinance
unique in Florida's legal
l says chat her wake-up
xother died from AIDS.
:1 left me with a sorrow
I was able to forge into
and then went on to work as a coach at the
University of Massachusetts at Amherst.
She began speaking out about homophobia
in sports, making her first speech in 1982
at a national conference on women's sports.
Griffin took her experiences nationwide
when she wrote Strong Women, Deep Closets,
a seminal work that explores the lives of lesbian athletes and coaches as they navigate the
homophobic world of sports.
Now in her retirement, Griffin is director of It Takes a Team!, an initiative of the
Women's Sports Foundation. "I get to travel
around the country talking to athletes, coaches and parents about my favorite topicmaking sports open and respectful for LGBT
people;' says Griffin. "I am incredibly lucky to
do the work I love, and know that work is a
small contribution to achieving equality in
and out of spores:'
FaithandActivism
Islam is intricately woven into the fabric of
RaquelEvitaSaraswati's
life. She says she is
quite traditional, praying daily, fasting during
the month of Ramadan, offering zakat (charity) and choosing to wear the hijab headdress.
One of the most important lessons she's taken
from the Koran is the teaching on justice.
"Equally important to me is dissent, when dissent is ethically necessary;' says Saraswati. "The
Koran tells us to be champions for justiceeven if our family and friends don't approve:'
At only 25 years old, Saraswati has
worked tirelessly in several capacities: as
a coordinator of Project Ijcihad and ex-
an indomitable will to refuse to be treated as
a second-class citizen, either by the straight
powers that were, or by the local gay men politicos who were entirely unaccustomed to a
smart, attractive, ballsy lesbian who wouldn't
take no for an answer;' says Bodiford.
Bodiford specializes in estate planning,
wills, trusts and powers of attorney for the
LGBT community and stresses the need to
consult with professionals who understand
the unique legal issues faced by queers."It is
crucial chat one's attorney is not only gay or
In Defense
of Equality
gay-friendly, but experienced in the nuances
Fort Lauderdale, Fla.-based attorney Robin of prejudice and the lack of basic rights we
have as gay couples;' she said. ■
Bodifordhas been credited with helping to
issue with Saraswati and her interpretation of
Islam, and her life has been threatened many
times. She concedes that it's sometimes scary,
but nothing deters her.
"We live in a world in which child rape
victims are being stoned;' she says. "Knowing
this, what is being called a few names or
receiving threats? As an American, I have
enormous freedom. If I do not use chat freedom to work for human rights, I, in fact, do
not deserve the air in my lungs:'
March 2009
I 17
ASTRO
GRRL
Can't Buy Me Love
Aarchmight be tricky, or it might be a treat. By Charlene Lichtenstein
p·sces(Feb.20-March20)
Sex:Love has a price tag. Will you be able to afford
her? Or maybe it's you who can be bought. Let's hope
so. Career:
Get out into the social whirl and expand
your list of contacts. The women you meet now will
worship you for the goddess you hope to become.
Ar'es(March21-April20)
Sex:Your best,kept secrets are exposed! She knows
exactly how you feel about her. Maybe that was your
intention all the time. Career:There is too much
going on behind the scenes at work. Lambda Rams
are advised to take a vacation, or at least a long lunch.
cially industrious at work now. Libras can tackleany
detailed task with relish. Add some sharp mustard,
with tons of baloney.
Scorpio(Oct24-Nov.22)
Sex: Working late will only make your girlfriend
angry and lonely. Try to leave the paperworkto
underlings and spend more rime pushing yourpaper
clip at home. Career:
You are aching to just havefun
chis March. So either make yourself scarceat workor
find creative ways to make the workday happier.Yes,
extended coffee breaks!
Gemini
(May22-June21)
Sex:A mild crush turns into a saucy lovergrrl. Is this
just a quick fling or something more permanent? Don't
drip on your clothing. Career:
You are magnificent and
effective at work. Even the senior bosses are impressed
with you. Ask for a raise before they wise up.
Sagittarius
(Nov.23-0ec.22)
Sex:Take everything to the outer limits this March.
or only are you primed and positioned for romance,
you are on someone's tasting menu. Career:
Work
from home, if you can. And if you can't, lightenyour
workload by delegating and going to meetings.
Cancer
(June22-July23)
Sex:You'll charm your way up through the power
elite and capture a powerful heart. Will you sleep
your way to the top? There are worse ways of get,
ting what you want. Career:
This may be a good time
to take some time off. Escape to a relaxing and non,
stressful place.
Capricorn
(Dec.23-Jan.20)
Sex:Spice up your home life with creative touches.
There is nothing more creative than using your body
as a dining room table. Where, or who, is dessert!
Career:Get your opinions out to the powers that be
and see how you can become the advisor to the cor·
porate stars.
Leo(July24-Aug.23)
Aquarius
(Jan.21-Feb.19)
Sex:Whisper sweet nothings in her ear. It willbe
cheaper than buying her expensive somethings.
Career:Aqueerians find ways to make much more
money this March. But how much time will that
take? Put it to work for you, rather than viceversa.I
zone, you can expect to be swept off your feet by a gor,
geous stranger. Wear comfortable shoes. Career:
Let
others fund your professional ascent this March. Seek
a well,endowed benefactress to help you grease your
corporate cog.
Virgo(Aug.24-Sept.23)
Sex:You are especially sexy and alluring now. Hurry
and strut your stuff on the catwalk before it goes on
Icurve
Libra(Sept 24-0cl 23)
Sex:1 lake sure that you have a meeting of the minds
in your relationship. Otherwise, you willhavehalfa
mind to make major changes. Career:
You are espe•
Taurus(April21-May21)
Sex:A love missive may miss its mark and wind up
in the wrong hands. Maybe that's a good thing. It will
keep her guessing-and intrigued. Career:
Gal pals
will help you out of a job jam. However, nothing beats
'fessing up and asking for forgiveness. Whisper, so the
boss can't hear.
Sex:If you explore the world beyond your comfort
1s
sale-deeply discoumed. Career.
Panners willbethe
best advisors for an •job,related issue chisMarch.Or
maybe they would prefer that you retire and just do
the laundry.
AstrologerCh,1rleneLichtensteinis the author
of Herscopes: A Guide to Astrology for
Lesbians. Get more at thestarryeyc.com
or go
to her blogat thestarryeye.typepad.com.
SCENE
•
ABOUT
G~ND~
1 AtAtlantaQueerLiterary
Fest(fromleft):authors
Theresa
Davis,Daphne
Gottlieb,
Blairandthehostof
Cliterati,
KarenGarrabrant,
at
CharisBooks2 Partygoers
at
HereLounge's
SheWired
bash
inWeHo3 Prop8 protestin
Minneapolis
4 AuthorEllen
HartandRutaSkujins,
owner
ofTrueColorsin Minneapolis
5 Jill Bennett,
CathyDeBuono
& fansat SheWired
bash6
Margaret
Choat a California
NoonProp8 rally
h.
e,
rk
c!
r-
s.
I
ADVICELipstick & Dipstick
Finicky Eateror Control Freak?
Dear Lipstick and Dipstick: What is with lesbians who have special dietary needs-and
put all their less evolved,meat eating,chocoholic, wheat bread and whole milk-loving
friends through hell over it? Casein point: I
went out with my special-needs-dietfriend
to listen to music. She wanted to eat out, but
I told her I had alreadyeatenand was just interested in the music and hang-outfactor. I'd
beenthrough this food thing once beforewith
her and didn't want to deal with it again.She
arrived late, hadn't eaten,got bored immediately and expectedmeto go out to dinnerwith
her.Accommodatingly,I said, "Whereshall we
go, becauseI can find somethingto eat anywhere?" This decisiontook 45 minuteswith a
lot of, "Let's just go to your favoriteplaceand I
won't eat becauseI usuallyjust cookat home."
Whatthe fuck? Whycan't lezziesjust sink their
teeth into a nicejuicy hotdog?- FedUpWith
the FinickyFemales
co
br
ge
ad
Di
ti
Wa
r
Lipstick:Oh, I can-and do-love me some
beef! I don't get it either, Fed Up. I feel
your pain, as I, too, get peeved when someone can't make a decision or always lets me
decide on things. Regarding the food issues,
however, I think what's going on with your
friend has little to do with what she does
or doesn't eat. Instead, she's struggling with
something beneath the surface. Does your
friend really know who she is? Is she often
closed-minded? Does she exercise compulsively? Regardless of where her issues stem
from, it's your choice to be in this friendship,
and if she really drives you that crazy, why
do you spend time with her?
What is with lesbians
who have special dietary
needs-and put all their
less evolved, meat eating,
chocoholic, wheat bread
and whole milk-loving
friends through hell over it?
20
I curve
Dipstick:Lipstick, you are so intolerant of
those with special food needs. How many
times do I have to tell you that I'm a vegetarian before you stop suggesting barbeque? Fed,
the issue here is not what your friend does or
does not eat, but how she uses it to manipulate you-and how you're letting yourself be
manipulated. People like her will use many
excuses to get their way: supposed phobias,
illnesses, a dislike of Brad Pitt films. They are
no fun to be around and think they're better
than you. I would never leave good music to
go watch a friend not eat. Stand up for yourself and your friend's bland diet will stop eating at you.
DearLipstickand Dipstick:I havea verypersonalquestionto ask.I'm 39 andI'vebeenout
sinceI was 15. I cantalk to anyone,makejust
aboutanyonelaughand feel at ease.I have
beentoldI am charming,
cute,confident,
adorableandverysmart.I amnotunattractive
orliving in an alternatereality. My problemis thatI
am very sexuallyinsecure.I want nothingmore
than to meet women and have very passionate sex. It's not an issue of not knowingwhat
tH
a
is
a
y
n
Y
o
a
S
L
to do and nothingreallyoffendsme sexually.
Youknowhowmostpeoplecansay,"Thebest
sexI haveeverhadwas..."? Well,I don'thave
that story.I haven'tbeensexuallymolested
or
beenin an abusiverelationship.
I havesimply
left relationships
feelinglike I did not satisfy
mypartner.Thishasalwaysbeenan issue,but
it's actuallygettingworse.At thispoint,I can't
comfortably
kiss anotherwomanwithoutmy
brainsaying,"Youareterribleat thisandsheis
gettingnothingoutof whatyouaredoing."
Any
advice?
- Stuckin LousyLoverland
f
Dipstick:Lipstick is the queen of affirmations, so she'll tell you to look in a mirror
and repeat to yourself over and over that
you're a good kisser. Me, I'll tell you that
you're looking at it all wrong. If you've had
sex, then certainly one of those times was
"the best:' Porno movies aren't real. Neither
are those stories your friends are telling you.
Our culture puts so much pressure on us to
have amazing sex. Just today, in my inbox I
have an invitation to have sex with a pretty
Russian girl, products to make sex with my
wife really amazing and seven ways to grow a
really big cock. Would there be a market for
these products if everyone really were having
amazing sex all the timer The real problem
is, you're spending so much time worrying
about yourself and your performance that
you're not paying attention to your partner's erotic call-and-response. The next time
you're making it with a girl, turn your mind
off and close your eyes. Take in her essence
and follow her energy, her lips, her sighs.
Shakira says it best: "Hips don't lie:'
Lipstick:Lezzie up! Instead of repeating
affirmations, why not kiss yourself out of
this rut? Go to the girl bar on Saturday, hop
on the dance floor and make out with as
many women as you can. A word of warning: Watch out, dykes can be territorial and
this may spark a girl fight if you're not careful (work your magic in dark corners). You
need to get your chops back, Lousy Lover,
so start by mounting that horse and riding it
like you've never ridden it before. Relax and
let your body lead you. Nervous Nellys make
for clumsy lovers. Breathe in, breathe out,
believe in your powerful libido and you and
your lover will both go places you've never
been before.
WHATISTHENO.1 REASON
LESBIAN
COUPLES
STOPHAVING
SEX?
Fallingoutof love
48%
add-breaking hearts in between. My advice
on this situation is standard: Respect the thin
line between friend and lover and never shack
up with your ex. Pack up your stuff, BOBFF,
and hit the road.
OPP(otherpeople'spussy)
Dipstick:Oh, Bummed Out, have I been
in your shoes! I once dated a sweet softball
AmericanIdol (orthe TV remote)
player named Rhonda and after the season
18%
was over, I broke up with her to fool around
with Patty the Paramedic. The thing with
Obsessive
fantasies
aboutLindsayLohan
Patty never went anywhere, of course, and
a few months later I saw Rhonda out at the
11%
bar dancing and drinking with a new flame.
Thehighcostof batteries
Instantly, I decided that Rhonda was the one
7%
for me and I would do anything to win her
Carpalcoochiesyndrome
back. So, of course, I did. And a few months
(aka Internetaddiction)
after that, I remembered all the reasons I'd
3%
broken up with Rhonda in the first place. So,
take a good long look at the relationship and
According
to a Lipstick& Dipstickblogpoll
think about the reason you two stopped being
lovers and became friends. And while you're
DearLipstick
andDipstick:
Mybestfriend,who's at it, go have a meaningless fling to take your
an ex-lover,and I just graduated
fromcollege mind off what's going on behind closed doors.
andhavebeenlivingtogetherfor the pastfive
years.Untilrecently,neitheroneof us hadany DearLipstickand Dipstick:My partnerand I
for 18
seriousrelationships
sincewe'dbeenwitheach havebeenin a committedrelationship
other.She'shada newgirlfriend
fora littleover years.I want somethingnew. The same ol'
sameol' is reallylameat thispoint- Asleep
a month.
As muchas I wantto be happyfor my best at the Wheel
friend,I find it very hard to hear abouther
relationship.
I alsodon'tliketo bearoundthem Lipstick:Stop the insanity, people! If you're
whentheyare togetherbecauseI don'tliketo unhappy, do something about it. When you
see them holdinghandsor kissing.It makes have a dream, make a plan and take the steps
me feel sad insideandweird.I alsodon'tlike to get there. Hate your lifer Get a new one.
it whenhergirlfriend
spendsthenightbecause Stuck in a loveless or sexless relationship?
all theydo is stayin herroomandit makesme Get into therapy to fix it or stop the bleeding.
uncomfortable.
I neverusedto feel this way Asleep at the Wheel, 18 years is a long time to
abouther.NowI feelas thoughI wantto bethe be passively resigned to complacency, so I bet
oneholdingherhand.DoI stillhavefeelingsfor you've been driving blind for years. Take conher,butjustneverrealizedit untilnow?Oram I trol of your life and start living the one you've
justfeelingthisway becauseit is an awkward imagined today. No more excuses.
situation?
ShouldI tell her aboutmy feelings?
Dipstick:Lipstick, chill out. She's just ask- BummedOutBFF
ing for sex advice. Visit Goodvibrations.com
Lipstick:You know that saying "Keep your
and pick out a few new toys, a sex book and a
friends close and your enemies closer" 2 Well, video or two. That should help get you out of
you should never substitute ex-girlfriends
your pothole. ■
for enemies. This is a dangerous trap, ladies,
and it's the reason many dykes end up in the
Is texting cheating? How
vicious ex-lover labia loop, where they're in
do you come out to a
and out of the same dead-end relationship for
Bible thumper? Watch
years, and why it can take a decade to break
new episodes of The
up a three-month fling, all the while- I might
Lipstick& DipstickShowat curvemag.com.
33%
March 2009 \ 21
ADVICERelationships
Rockthe Boat, Baby
Surviving a lesbian cruise with your girlfriend. By Kate Lacey
Just to be fair, not everyone who goes on a
lesbian cruise is crossing the gangplank to
find a vacation fling. While setting sail on
the ship of drools promises all the wanton
sex and booze of Dinah Shore Week, minus
the pesky golfing, many couples take these
cruises with romantic intentions that sometimes actually involve each other. In theory,
vacationing is supposed to be a stress-free
activity, but in reality, being away from home
and dependent on someone else's company
for a few days can actually promote arguments. Follow these dos and don'ts and try
not to end up walking the plank.
Dotaketimeto doyourownthing.Too much
togetherness can be bad. Remember, if you
are joined at the hip and one of you goes
overboard, you both go. Take a Zumba class
while she learns what the heck shuffleboard
is. The independent activities you sign up for,
however, should not include the words "singles;' "wet T-shirt;' "hot, hot, hot" or "what
happens on C-deck stays on C-deck:'
Do not fall intothe temptationof flirtingwith
otherwomen.Especially if you know this is
something that makes your lover crazy. If
you have a wandering eye then avoid drinking too much-being inhibited may be the
only thing keeping you afloat. Getting drunk
in the nightclub and hanging all over cute
girls is a good way to turn your pleasure boat
into the Titanic. You haven't seen an iceberg
until you have spent hours out in the cold
hallway pleading with your partner through
a locked stateroom door.
Doallowyourselves
to meetnewpeople.Even
on a romantic getaway cruise, no couple is
an island. There's no need to fear the company of others. Not everyone is trying to
cruise your girlfriend. Talk to the people
you are seated next to at dinner. Try doing
some group activities that do not involve
body shots or stripper poles. Try talking to
the Lindsay Lohan-esque part-time lesbian
or the baby dyke with more piercings than a
sieve-just to broaden your horizons.
Do not fall into the food pit. Beware of the
way food on a cruise ship can be shoveled
down your throat in a culinary orgy. When
your girl suggests going whale watching, she
probably does not mean watching you graze
at the buffet for five days and four nights.
Do be preparedfor seasickness.
Bring your
own remedies or over-the-counter medication and nurse yourself and each other those
first few hours until you get your sea legs.
This is much better than being confined to
your cabin for two days because the infirmary is afraid that you are a walking petri
dish of disease.
0
a1
ca
m
le
cl~
dif
as
w
Ij
Donotfall intothe moneytrap.Money can be ha
a key catalyst for arguments between couples th
on a cruise. There are plenty of free activi- in
ties you can take advantage of on the ship in
order to save money. Sunsets and sunrises
are free. Using the phone to call the kennel
to check on the dogs is very, very expensive.
On many ships, there are free programs,
concerts, seminars and gym equipment for
your use. Cheesy souvenirs, T-shirts and
overpriced jewelry should be avoided.
Do use yourmoneyto get off the boatfor a
day trip. It's worth the extra expense to get
a change of scenery and check out the local
color. You'll appreciate this time together
much more than you would sitting in front
of the slot machines, mindlessly pushing
buttons, because eventually you'll push each
other's buttons.
g
Y
w,
Do makeuse of the conciergeandthe social n
n
director.They can help plan your trip and
g
provide little romantic surprises for your
girl, like private dinners, flowers, moonlight
walks-even having the band play her favorite song. And they can help you pick appropriate excursions and make reservations at each
stop. The little details will go a long way
toward making her remember why she is
with you in the first place.
A cruise is an excellent way to immerse
yourselves in the excitement and buzz of a
social group because there is always a party
going on and you are always invited. But the
ship also gives you the opportunity to insulate yourselves, to hide away in your cabin or
find remote areas of the ship where romance
a
can go full steam ahead. ■
22
Icurve
Ask Fairy Butch ADVICE
Lookin' for Love
r
e
DearFairyButch:I am writing becauseI have
a problemtrusting and allowing someoneto
careaboutme.I don't know if I havea sign on
my backthat saysI only needpart-timeloveor
leftover pity-I'm not sure. I don't do bars or
clubs,and beinga shy personhas madeit very
difficult for me to approachsomeoneto just
ask for a date or coffee. I don't want to deal
with gamesor dramaor headachesof any kind.
I just needsomeonewho's willing to meet me
halfway.Whereareall thoseeligiblewomenout
therelookingfor a real relationship?- Lonely
in Louisville
DearLonely:As for meeting potential part,
ners, darlin: I'll tell you exactly where you
can find them: the Internet! There are tons
of dating sites that cater to dykes, and dyke sec,
tions within mainstream sites. So many people
have met their sweeties on the Internet
that getting together with folks you've met
online has simply become par for the course.
Try gayoptions.com and lesbiandating.com
for specifically lesbian sites, and butch,
femmedating.com, if you're into that scene.
Remember to use common sense when dat,
ing online. Meet in a public place and don't
give out your home address before you feel
you can really trust your date.
As for your relationship issues, hon, you
won't find answers just by seeing a new part,
ner or changing your dating venue. You may
have been hurt in the past, but if you're truly
going to ready yourself for romance, then
the time has come to move on. Take les,
sons from your past experiences, but don't
dwell on the negativity you may have found
there. It's a new era for you, Lonely, one in
which you'll need to focus on making your,
self as fulfilled and actualized as you can
be. And, if you feel as though you're always
the one giving and never receiving in return,
you can find support at organizations like
Codependents Anonymous or in books like
Codependent No More, by Melody Beattie.
verballyabusive
to mein thepast.Sinceshehas
startedmedication,
sheisa completely
different
person.Shestoppeddrinking,stoppedabusing
me, evenstoppedchewingtobaccobecauseI
can'tstandit! But I don'tknowif I cancontinue
this relationship
becauseI cannotforgetwhat
shedid.
Shewentto jail twicefor whathappened.
I
don'tthinkshewouldeverhitmeagain,butonly
becausewherewe live,there'sa third strike
andyou'reoutpolicy.Shewouldautomatically
get sixmonthsin prison.So,it isn'tenoughfor
methatsheis onlybeing"good"so shewon't
goto prison.
AmI beingunfair?I justcan'tseem
to rekindlewhatwe had.MostofthetimeI look
at heranddon'tfeelanything.
- Confused
and
Coldin Colorado
DearConfused:
Honey, you tell me. You are
the person who chose to continue this rela,
tionship, even while she was being so terribly
abusive to you. You are the one who decided
to stick with it, even while she was acting like
anything but a loving partner. You are the one
who devalued yourself by staying in this rela,
tionship when you needed to get the hell out.
Do you want to know why I'm being so
uncharacteristically tough with you? Because
I've been there and I don't want you to spend
one more minute in that warped reality. A
lifetime ago, I spent two years with a woman
who'd tear me up at night and then tape an
apology in the same doorway each morn,
ing after. I stayed with her because I didn't
know what to do. I was living in a small
Midwestern town in the mid '80s, and had
access to virtually no resources. Allow me to
offer you some: Debra Strang's suitelOl.com
articles, Abuse in Lesbian Relationships, by
Kali Munro and No More Secrets: Violence in
Lesbian Relationships, by Janice Ristock. Then
get yourself to the local domestic violence
shelter and tell them your story. ■
Fairy Butch is the author of The
Ultimate Guide to Strap,On Sex:
DearFairyButch:I havebeenwith my partner A Complete Resource for Women
for a longtime-we hada weddingceremony and Men. EmailJb@fairybutch.com
andeverything.
Butshehasbeenphysically
and with your queries.
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ADVICEHealth
Lesbian Health Throu h the A es
Our quick-reference chart will help you to stay healthy at any age. By Victoria A. Brownworth
The news is rife lately with tales of people living into their 90s and
beyond. There are over 84,000 centenarians in the United States
today. ot everyone wants to live to be 100, but, regardless oflongev~
ity, we all want to live out our lives as fully and healthily as possible.
Throughout our adult lives, women go through more health changes
than men, due to menstruation, childbirth and menopause. Women
can avert most potential health crises with preventive measures. Most
others are ameliorated by early treatment. Knowing your body and t]
recognizing any changes are essential. At each decade of our adult
lives, lesbians need to be concerned about specific healthcare issues.
The following guidelines are ones we should all follow to live the t]
healthiest and longest lives we can, whether we reach 100 or not.
Os
Os
Mostwomenin their 20s presumethat
becausetheir healthis goodthey don't
needregularphysicalexams.But it's in
your 20sthat youmostneedto establish
regimensto preventserioushealthissues
in the future.Thereis nothingbetterfor
youroverallhealthat anyagethan quiting
smoking,drinkingin moderation,maintaininga moderateweightlevel,exercising
at leastthreetimesa week,walkingdaily,
alwayswearingsunscreenandtaking a
calciumsupplementeveryday.
Byage35 yourestrogenlevelswill start to
decrease,whichcan leadto fibroidtumors
in the uterus,osteopeniaandosteoporosis. Yourmetabolismalsoslows,so it is
harderto loseweightandeasierto gain
it. Everywomanshouldhavea baseline
mammogramby age35. It's alsorecommendedthat womenhavea baseline
DEXAscan,or bone-densitytest, as well.
Youshouldget testedfor thyroiddisease
by age35-it's increasinglycommonin
women,particularlyin thosewho smoke.
Breast,heart,boneandcolonhealthare
the bigfour in your40sand50s.Regular
mammograms
arevital. Everywoman
shouldhavea colonoscopy
byage50and
annualbonedensitytestsfromthenon.
A full cardiacwork-up,includinganEKG
anda stresstest is, recommended
for
women40 andover.Estrogenprotects
ourheartsandbones,andas menopause
nears,estrogenlevelsdropprecipitously.
Ovarian,uterineandendometrial
cancers
aremostcommonin womenover40.
t]
At this age,youneedto be cognizant
of yoursexualhealthandtake precautions to maintainit. Sexualhealthand
overallhealthare inextricablylinked,and
someSTDscan be fatal, so get checked
regularly.Thehumanpapalomavirus,
chlamydiaand herpesare mostcommonamongyoungwomen.In additionto
practicingsafesexandhavingregular
PAPtests, youshouldlearnhowto do
breastself-examinations.
Manywomenin
their 20s and30s havefibroadenomas,
or
benigncysts,in their breasts.Getto know
your breastsandwhat theyfeel like and
you'll knowif somethingchanges.
If youareconsideringchildbirth,you
shouldget a thoroughgynecological
exam,
includinga fertility test. Manywomenwho
havechlamydiaareunawareof it, although
it's a leadingcauseof infertility.If youare
overweightor haveirregularperiods,your
chancesof gettingpregnantdiminish.
Youshouldavoidcaffeine,high-fatfoods,
smoking,alcoholanddrugsif youwant
to havea healthybaby.A gooddiet and
regularexercisehavebeenprovento aid
in conception.Besureto considerall the
ramificationsof yourchoiceto havea child
andmakesureyou'reawareof all your
optionsfor conception.
Mostwomengo into activemenopausein their late 40s or early50s.
If your periodceasesor becomes
irregular,or you havebleedingwhen
it is not time for your period,havea
gynecologicalcheck-up.Yourdoctor
candeterminewhetherfurthertesting
is necessaryto checkfor ovarianor
uterinecysts or changesin the uterine
wall. Perimenopause
and menopause
can bringon severemoodswings.
Insomnia,boutsof crying,hypersensitivity, irritability, decreasedlibido,
memorylossanddepressionareall
"normal" responses.
Womenin their 20sare oftencomingto
termswith their true sexualidentityand
comingout to friendsandfamily.This
can causea myriadof stressesandeven
rifts with familyandfriends.Also,women
with seriousmentalillnesseslike bipolar
disorder,or who haveaddictionissues,
are often diagnosedin their 20s. It's very
importantto havinga supportnetworkto
helpyouavoiddepressionandmanagethe
life changesyougo through.
Manywomenhaverelationshipdifficulties
in their 30s,whichcan bringon depression.Pursuingnonromanticfriendships,
seekingsupportgroupsandgetting
therapywhenneededare integralto
maintainingmentalstabilityandhealth
after a breakup.If youare in an abusive
relationship,seekhelp.Reportedincidents
of domesticviolencebetweenlesbians
haverisenin recentyears.Violenceis
neveracceptable.
Osand up
·•
24
I curve
··························•·······························
Whilemenopauseis a normalfact
of everywoman'slife, everybody
and mindrespondsdifferentlyto the
hormonaldisruption,andsomewomen
can haveseriousmentalandphysical
healthissuesas a result. Everywoman
over40 shouldsee her gynecologistor
physicianto discusshowto approach
menopausalchanges-physical and
mental-and to see if changesin diet
or medicationare required.
Money ADVICE
Five Ways to Protect Your Cash
Yourprimarycarephysician(PCP)or
physician'sassistantshouldgiveyoua
physicaloncea year.Thefollowingtests
shouldbe included:
With the economy in turmoil, it's easy to feel scared about your financial future, so we enlisted
the help of lesbian financial guru Rachel Robasciotti and her associate Maya Philipson to give
you some insider tips on how to fight the fear and take control of your finances.
Trustyourjudgment.
"One of the great things
about our lesbian clients, and women in
general;' says Robasciotti, "is that we don't
generally invest in things that we don't
understand. And a lot of the recent financial
meltdown has had its core in people investing in things that they did not understand:'
Philipson agrees: "If any of your readers are
worried that they don't know enough about
investments, or they're worried about investing, tell them we think that they can absolutely learn and that they'll be better at it
than the men:• [RachelLastra]
Bloodglucosecheck:Thistest screens
for diabetesor hypoglycemia.
Bloodpressurecheck:Thisbasictest
shouldbe doneeveryvisit.
Breastexam:An annualmanualexam
by yourPCPis an essentialscreeningfor
breastcancer.
~
Completebloodcount{CBC):
Thistest
screensfor anemiaandmeasuresblood
componentslike thyroid,liverandkidneyvalues,as well as cholesterollevels.
PAPsmear:Usuallypartof an annual
pelvicexam,this canbedonebyyourPCP.
Skincancercheck:Thisvisualinspection of yourentirebodyshouldbe done
everythreeyears-more frequentlyif
youhavea familyhistoryof skin cancer
or manymoles.
~
TBtest:Thistest for exposureto tuberculosisshouldbe doneeveryyearfor
peopleat highrisk, or as suggestedby
yourdoctor.
~
Urinalysis:
Screensfor urinarytract
infectionsandkidneydisorders,in addition to otherdiseases,suchas diabetes.
~
Eyeexamandglaucomatest:
Glaucoma
is a leadingcauseof blindness.
Talk to
Your
Doctor
lesbiansdid not "come out"
51% toof their
doctor,though...
910/70
0/
32 70
believedthat it was important
that their doctor knew their
sexualorientation.
of physiciansaskedtheir
patientsaboutsexual
orientation.
Source:Societyof Obstetricians
andGynaecologists
of Canada
Takea breath."Don't panic;' says Robasciotti.
"Don't sell out of your investments and put
the money in cash or under your mattress,
because you'll lock in all your losses:'
Watchyour wallet."The easiest way to live
off of less;' says Philipson, "is to have a lot
of play in your spending, a lot of flexibility.
And you get some of that flexibility by keeping those fixed expenses low. It's a bad time
to take on a new mortgage or a new car payment, or to decide you want premium cable,
because those are things that come out of
your monthly expenses:'
Demolishdebt."One of the most important
things to realize is that if you are in the
process of taking on debt, that debt is busy
growing in the same way investments would
be busy growing, only it's not in your favor.
If you can get yourself in a position where
you are not taking on debt, you're doing a lot
for your retirement;' advises Robasciotti. "It
doesn't matter if you've accumulated a million dollars at retirement, if you also have a
million dollars of debt to pay off'
Makethetoughchoices.
"I would also recommend that people challenge the assumptions
about what they believe it costs for them to
live. If you can reduce some expenses, you'll
create more money to pay off debt and save
for retirement;' says Robasciotti.
X Marksthe Spot
With Molly Ringwald back
in Hollywood, it's prime
time for Gen X to finally get
a little attention. Lisa Chamberlain's
Slackonomics: Generation X in the Age
of Creative Destruction shows why Gen
Xers are ready to take the reins from Baby
Boomers-not a moment too soon-while
Jeff Gardinar's X Saves the World shows
how the generation of riot grrrls, Alex P.
Keaton and Sassy magazine got the shaft
but might still save the world. Some stats:
~~~
of the workforce
are Gen Xers. 1
cB@~
of the workforce are
Baby Boomers. 1
cB7?~
of Gen Xers say
they'd "happily" stay
with their present
employers for the
rest of their careers. 2
Gen X employees work more paid and
unpaid hours than their same-age counterparts did in the 1970s; Baby Boomers and
Generation Yers work significantly less.3
2
Sources:'NewStrategistPublications,
Catalyst,3FamiliesandWorkInstitute
DYKE
DRAMA
FallingOut of Love
What to do when you just can't do it anymore. By Michele Fisher
She puts her hand on yours as you are driv,
ing and your first impulse is to shake it off
as if it were a tarantula. The sound of her
voice makes you want to jump out the near,
est window. Headache, diarrhea, cramps,
Ebola-what will your excuse be tonight for
avoiding intimacy with her?
So, you went and fell out of love. Damn.
Now what are you supposed to do?
The good news is that you didn't really
fall out of love. Most likely, you were never
in love in the first place. Lust, attraction,
intrigue-these
are the fool's gold of love,
26 j
curve
and often you only know it ain't the real thing
when the tinsel starts to wear off. Falling out
of love is rare, but falling out of like or lust is
the fuel that drives the dyke drama engine.
The problem is that you have already told
her that you love her, and now you want to
hop into a time machine, yank the lever and
get that moment back. Maybe you could stay
in there a few seconds longer, so that you two
would never meet. Who cares if the entire
world is thrown into chaos because of your
meddling-at
least you wouldn't be in this
mess.
can
the
and
SOO
lov
rel
You could just look her in the eye and tell yo
her that you have lost that lovin' feeling. But WO
you are not going to do that ... at least not for
a while. First, you will need to go through the lice
denial phase. You will blame your feelingson m
your menstrual cycle, your stressful job 01
the television depictions of lesbian life that
make you feel inadequate. Every relationshif tha
has its ups and downs-you
two just neec ret
(insert almost anything here]. (The deniai to
phase lasts from one week to a lifetime.)
pa
We take refuge in our forests of deniai ym
because we don't like breaking promises. it.
Truth, justice and the lesbian way is what w
we are all about. Telling somebody you love ou
them is kind of like a promise. A promise an
lasts forever. You can't tell a woman you're no
longer in love with her. That would be like
saying that your word is just no good. Thar
you are flaky and unreliable. That you are unstable. You are just not that kind of person,
so there must be some other explanation for
your negative feelings about her.
So, rather than admit your mistake, you
waste years pretending that you are in love.
Well, at least you don't look flaky.
You could try going to therapy. Throw
some money at the problem. When you
finally leave her, it will look like you tried
everything. Besides, therapy is a great way
to figure out why this is her fault, too.
You have got to lighten that backpack full
of guilt; it is weighing you down, sister.
Body,image problems, conflicting life goals,
substance abuse, self,esteem
good therapist can find all kinds of things
to take the heat off you in this situation.
Another benefit of therapy is that your
unsuspecting partner will be dragged into
doubt and unhappiness with you. Why
should you be the only one in pain? Rip the
lid off her security and comfort and expose
her to the cold, hard reality of whatever
insight the therapist provides.
For me, nothing ends a relationship like
therapy. You may never really get to what it
is that's bugging you, but if you hang in there
long enough the relationship will end. If you
t
e
n
r
t
°F
d
t
e
e
can go more than once a week, do it. Sitting
there for hours dredging up bad memories
and resentments is bound to take its toll
sooner or later. If you are really lucky, your
lover will call it quits to the therapy and the
relationship all by hersel£ thereby absolving
you of all wrongdoing and guilt. That truly
would be a storybook ending.
Whether it's aided and abetted by a
licensed professional or fueled by alcoholinduced courage, the truth will emerge
eventually. Try as you might to make the
end as dignified and painless as possible,
that is not how it will be. Psychobabble and
retrenchment are no match for your need
to be free. Perhaps you will be at a dinner
party, surrounded by horrified friends, when
your demons will pay an unannounced visit. Or maybe she will ask you where you
want to honeymoon and you will blurt
out that you want to honeymoon with
another woman.
Actions speak louder than words, so some
girls find that having an affair is the best way
to show that you no longer care. Avoid the
entire topic of wanting out of the relationship by creating a new, more interesting discussion, like why you are screwing somebody
else. Making her hate you is way better than
seeing her cry over you.
Breakups are messy, but they are particularly messy when one party is keeping a
horrible secret. The only thing worse is not
keeping that secret. Just tell her that you have
thought about it and there is nothing you
can do to make this relationship work. Don't
tell her that you were never in love. I don't
care if it's the truth, that little nugget is just
for you. Honesty after the fact is just cruelty
dressed to the nines. Breaking her heart is
unavoidable, but making her think that her
entire past was a lie is just unnecessary.
When you tell her you want out, you are
going to feel like a heel and she is going to
feel hurt and rejected and maybe even mad.
Great. You cannot and should not attempt
to control that. (And don't bother trying to
own any sadness in this situation. It makes
you look like even more of a jerk.) This time
you are the villain-next
time you may be
the victim.
And maybe that is part of the problem. We
need more characters in Dykeland. It seems
the only parts we get to play are villains and
victims. How many women have we loved:'
How many have we dumped:' How many
have gotten rid of us:'
Everybody is looking for the same thing:
happiness. In our quest for what makes our
hearts smile, we make mistakes. We are not
evil or awful, we are just selfish and needy.
It is the human condition. It is how we survive. Yep, I had to get dumped a whole lot of
times to acquire the wisdom I have. Here's
hoping you never have to reach this level of
enlightenment. ■
POLITICS
Rememberthe Ladies
I
du
Sen
When will women achieve full equality in the United States? By Victoria A. Brownworth
A by-product of the Second \\Tave of feminism was establishing women's historywhat some of us called "herstory"-as
a
discipline char needed to be studied. \\'hat
were women's roles in che United Scates
and the world? In order to know what we
could accomplish in the future, we needed to
uncover che role models from our past. \Ve'd
all grown up hearing about the Founding
Fathers, bur what about the Founding
Mothers? V..1e needed women's \Vork to be
recognized, and if men were not going to do
it, we would have to do it ourselves.
In 1981, Congress passed a resolution
establishing 1 rational \\'omen's History
\\'eek. Ir \Vas in 1 larch, to coincide with
International \\'omen's Day on March 8.
In 19 7, Congress expanded che week to a
month. For the past 22 years, Congress has
issued a resolution for \\omen's History
onrh.
The president al o is ues an annual proclamation about \\ omens History
lonrh.
Last vear' proclamation b • George \ \.
Bush scared, "\\omens History. fonth provides our countr • che privilege of honoring
the countless contributions char American
women have made throughout our history:'
1 rot very inspired.
Despite the token month in their honor,
women have a long hi rory of being ignored
b • their government. Abigail Adams, the
wife of John Adams, the second president
of the nired Scares, was a tirele s ad\·ocare for womens rights. In a series of letters co her husband during the American
Revolution and his tenure as president,
he wrote compellingl ' of the need for
che government to recogni::e the importance of women in the evolving nation.
Her frustration with the econd-cla.ss earns
of women m the fledgling democracy led her
co write, "If particular care and attention is
not paid co the ladie , we are determined co
foment a rebellion, and will nor hold ourelves bound b ' an ' laws in \\ hich we have
no voice or repre entation."
If only women had taken her word co che
28
I curve
du
Th
gen
be
by
an
for
las
WO
rhe
bu
ing
pe
pa
ch
19
wr
wa
WO
lio
p
streets, as she warned they would, women
might not be languishing in the second-class
status-or
stasis-they
are in today. There
was no women's rebellion 200 years ago.
And while it can be argued chat women have
achieved significant advances since then,
they have yet to achieve full equality in the
C'niced States.
It rook women 174 years after Adams
wrote chose words to get the right to vote.
And it wasn't until 2008, more than 200
years later, chat a woman ran for president
on the ticket of a major parry and came close
to receiving the nomination.
Although Adams understood that women
had a struggle ahead of chem, in the revolutionary atmosphere of 18th-century America
she may have hoped that women would forge
ahead the ,vay che men had.
Bur \\ omen have had a difficult time
achieving any real power in American government. Instead of becoming president,
Clinton was appointed Secretary of Scaceonly che third woman to be appointed to
char post.
\\omens' ability to break chrough che glass
ceiling of American government has been
limited. There have been only 35 women in
the Senate since its establishment in 1789.
Out of 1,897 Americans who have served
in the Senate, less than 2 percent have been
female.
Today, only 16 of che 100 senators cur,
renrly serving are women, yet chat is still
more than ever before. Twelve of the wornen who have served were appointed, six
of whom were appointed to succeed their
w
la
to
w
P
deceased husbands.
Equality continues to elude women
in the government and because of the
e
government.
Today, the "gender gap in earnings"-as
it is called in the U.S. Census Report-is
s
25 percent. For every dollar a man makes,
a woman gets 76.5 cents. For every $100 c
dollars for a man, a woman makes only
$76.50; for every 10,000, only $7,650,
and so on.
This gap is stunning, and is made more
so by the fact char the Equal Pay Ace,
devised to eradicate wage discrimination, p
was passed in 1963.
0
In 2005, then-Senator
Clinton introduced the Paycheck Fairness Act in the
Senate and Rep. Rosa DeLauro introduced the same legislation in the House.
The PFA was written to amend the
gender gap in women's pay that had yet to
be addressed. The Act was reintroduced
by Clinton and DeLauro in 2006, 2007
and 2008.
According to the PFA, the average income
for a male over the age of 15 in 2006 ( the
last year data was available) was $48,768. For
women over the age of 15 in the same year,
the average income was only $31,402.
The House finally passed the PFA last July,
but it was held back in the Senate. Those voting against the Act argued it would unfairly
penalize employers who would be forced to
pay women comparably to men-something
they were supposed to have been doing since
1963.
After the House voted on the Act, DeLauro
wrote in a Huffington Post op-ed piece, "This
wage disparity between men and women costs
women anywhere from $400,000 to $2 million over a lifetime:'
It took women in Congress to bring the
PFA to the floor. Unfortunately, the govn ernment-still
a male bastion-is
no more
n responsive to women's rights now than it
was 200 years ago when Abigail Adams
d wrote to her husband, "Remember the
n ladies, and be more generous and favorable
to them than your ancestors:'
President Obama committed himself to
·11 women's issues during the election cam, paign and frequently referenced the achieve·x ments of Clinton, his closest Democratic
1r rival, and commended her as a role model
for his own daughters as well as for other
n young women.
But two centuries after Adams called for
equality for women, we have yet to achieve it.
s Clinton echoed Adams' exhortations when
she asserted, "There cannot be true democs, racy unless women's voices are heard. There
cannot be true democracy unless women are
given the opportunity to take responsibility
for their own lives. There cannot be true
democracy unless all citizens are able to pare ticipate fully in the lives of their country:'
This Women's History Month, with a new
, president and a new administration, it is time
once again to make our voices heard. ■
News Notes
growingon their Facebook
group,"Gay
womenget batteredat children'sschool."
GayMarriageDebateMovedto Iowa
In December
2008the IowaSupremeCourt
beganhearingargumentsfromsix gay
coupleschallengingthe state'sbanon
same-sexmarriage.Thecasehadbeen
makingits waythroughthe courtsystemfor
overthreeyearsbeforeit gotto the Supreme
Court,andit is estimatedthat the court
couldtakeup to a yearor moreto cometo
a decision.
Pro-GayMarriageChurchLeadersUnite
A groupof religiousleadersin Maine
haveformeda groupcalledthe Religious
Coalitionfor the Freedomto Marryin
Maineandare urgingMaine'sresidentsto
endmarriagediscriminationin the state.
Thecoalition,which includesmembers
of the UnitedMethodist,Episcopaland
Presbyterian
churches,heldpressconferencesthat coincidedwith
the beginningof marriages
for same-sexcouplesin
Connecticut.
Lesbianto LeadObama's
Environmental
Council
PresidentObamaselected
NancySutley(right)to chair
the WhiteHouseCouncil
on Environmental
Quality.
Sutleywasthe first prominentmemberof the LGBT
communityto be appointed
to a postin Obama'sadministration.She
hasa longrecordof workingon environmentalpolicyandpreviouslyservedas the
deputymayorfor energyandthe environmentin LosAngeles.
LesbianMomsAssaulted
Two lesbianswere attackedby another
parentoutsidetheir child'sschoolin
Oshawa,Ontario,in Canada.
Theman
hurledhomophobic
insultsat the pairand
physicallyassaultedthemin full viewof
childrenandotherparents.Theattacker
wasarrestedandchargedwith two counts
of assault.Thevictimsandtheir supporterscalledfor the attackerto becharged
with a hatecrimebut policefoundthat the
crime"did not meetthe narrow[definition]
of hatecrime."Supportfor the womenis
MinorityGroupsComeOutAgainstGay
MarriageBan
Severalcivil rightsgroupshaveaskedthe
CaliforniaSupremeCourtto annulthe ban
on gaymarriagethat passedin November
2008.Amongthesegroupsarethe NAACP
LegalDefenseandEducational
Fund,the
Mexican-American
LegalDefenseand
Educational
Fundandthe
AsianPacificAmericanLegal
Center.
Thegroupshave
arguedthat lettingstand
the ban(whichoverturneda
previousSupremeCourtdecisionallowinggaymarriage
rightsin the state)mayserve
to underminethe rightsof
racialminoritygroups.
CaliforniaAttorney
GeneralReversesPosition
on Proposition
8
AttorneyGeneralJerryBrownchangedhis
positionon California'ssame-sexmarriage
banandhasaskedthe StateSupremeCourt
to voidProposition
8. Afterthe measure
passedBrownsaidthat hewoulddefendit,
but hassincestatedthatthe banis unconstitutionalbecauseit deprivesa minorityof
a fundamentalright.
ActivistsUniteAgainstProp8
Folksaroundthe world demonstrated
againstthe passageof Prop8 in California.
Planningfor the protestswas startedby a
Seattleblogger,AmyBalliett,whosewebsite,jointheimpact.com,
allowedvolunteers
to postinformationaboutthe protests.
Protestswereattendedby hundredsof
thousandsof peoplein morethan300cities.
[RachelLastra]
March 2009
I 29
Depending on one's perspective, JT Leroythe abused transgender teen who turned truck
stop tricks before he became a celebrity cult
author-was either a tragic hoax that eroded
the public's faith in autobiographical tellalls or, as former New York Press editor John
Strausbaugh tells it, an "elaborate nom de
plume, sort of a 21st-century George Sand.
Here's this middle-aged woman who's not
getting anywhere as a writer. She reinvents
herself as a girly boy and becomes a huge success. On whom does that reflect more poorly,
her or all the rest of us?"
Author and designer Savannah Knoop,
whose sister-in-law Laura Albert penned the
Leroy books, doesn't have the answer. But the
woman who played the public face of Leroy at
readings, celebrity-studded parties (with folks
like Winona Ryder, Gus Van Sant and Dennis
Hopper), and even in the bedroom of actor
Asia Argento during their brief affair, certainly
understands America's obsession with
celebrity and realness.
Knoop, whose memoir, Girl
Boy Girl: How I Became
JT Leroy, talks to Diane
Anderson-Minshall about
being outed as JT, coming out as queer, exposing
herself to Carrie Fisher and
how playing the public face
of someone else's creation
changed her life forever.
30
I curve
Youwerelyingto peoplein yourdailylife. Didyouend uptellingthemor Ye
didtheydiscoverit in the New YorkTimes?
aro
JT
They discovered it like everybody else.
all
Whatwastheirreaction?
I think it was just utter surprise. It's so wacky and out of context to everyone's I d
daily life. I'm kind of amused [at] how many different layers there were to this I
story and how long it went on. Probably for my co-workers it explained a lot
because I'd been out so much.
Youwerelivingasthistransgender
personoutin the publiceye.Howmuch
didthat changewhoyouare?
I think I've always been interested in gender and, you know, exploring my
sexuality. Even in high school, I was interested in that. I was obsessed with
Orlandoin seventh grade. I've always kind of been interested in alter egosand
shape-shifting-you know, the balance of gender within one person. [Playing
JT] gave me a lot of insight into my own interests and I feel like I embrace
that more and more. That was one of the parts that I kind of took into my
own life.
Didit impactyourowngenderidentityor did it just allowyouto express
yourgender?
'J\.llowed to express" is a good way to say it. I kind of remember feeling distraught-at the beginning-that I could pass for a boy, because I wasn't chat
comfortable with that part of mysel£ That [part] had always been there but it
was just pointing it out more. Looking at a picture and having someone say,"Oh
diQ
in~
wi
wi
yeah, you look just like a boy"... and thinking,
"I do!" And then becoming more and more
comfortable with that. When you go too far
into it and you finally embrace something, you
embrace it all the way. It's definitely a part of
me, and it's not like I'm trying. It's just there,
so I might as well accept it.
sonal for them. There was a whole range of emotions
that people would project onto him-that they had
taken from the books and mixed with their personal
take us under her
experience.
Perhaps. I remember her taking a photo of me
and saying, "Oh God, you even kind of look
like him:' I don't know if you ever saw, on the
back ofJT's books, she had somebody playing
him. She had a portrait of this stranger and
she said, "Oh, you even kind of look like this
person:' We had kind of the same facial struc,
ture or something. I feel like I have a-I don't
know if it was the shyness, but she could see
that we had a crossover. I felt like I was a good
fit. I wanted to think I was. You know:'
ally strongly. I've never been homeless-that was the
part where I couldn't speak from experience. The
gender stuff I really connected to. Laura, whatever
she had been through there was something that was personal secret or
Therewere so manytoughissuesthat he con- wing and ... l felt
nectedwith readerson,fromsexabuseto homelike ... l have nothing
lessnessto gender.Didyoueverconnectwith the
to give you that's
Do youthink that LauraAlbertsaw some- workthat way?
thingin youwhensheaskedyouto be JT? I did connect to the books. I responded to them re,
Shetoldan interviewerthat youput on the
wig andthe glassesandwentoutthereand
it was like JT enteredyourbody.
I find that interesting. It took me a lot longer
to embrace that. Sometimes I feel like, "Oh, it's
just like a ghost story:' I was there the whole
time, it was like I was possessed. There was
some other energy to him and he had his own
presence and character.
channeling the emotional truth. JT was-it wasn't something."
being-I don't know. I felt like I connected to it
and universally people were connecting through
the theme between the mother and son. I wasn't always com,
fortable with that part of it. I think that comes across in the
book.
Do youthink Laurawas right in thinkingthat withoutthe
hoaxthisworkwouldn'thavegottentheattentionit did?
Her reason for doing it was very individual for her and I can
say that I think that she sincerely had all these different rea,
sons. And I guess that was one of them. I don't think that
she'd probably say it exactly like that.
Butreaderswere moreinterestedbecauseit was written
by somebody
who'dgonethroughthoseexperiences,
versussomemiddle-aged,
middle-class
woman.
I think that we're in a very strange place where really there is
Doyouevermissthat energyandcharacter this obsession with authenticity. You see it in reality shows
and there was the James Frey [controversy] that came out
that JT had?
Yeah. I've gone through feeling like he would never come
around again. There was such playfulness.
JT Leroywas an iconto transgender
individuals.
Afterthis
all happened,
whatwastheir response?
e's I don't know if I've really gotten the opportunity [to find out].
is I mean I have a lot of friends in the queer community who
or are transgender. They know about me being JT ... It's hard
to gauge it from my friends who didn't know about it before
h [they knew me] ...I've had some mixed response, but from the
transgender community ... ! think that they kind of under,
y stand it, all of the many layers of it.
h Whatdidyoulearnaboutfameandcelebrity?
d It was such a specific case, because I was approaching it from
g kind of a disconnected place. It wasn't my work that was out
e there. It was Laura's work, or JT's work, and I was there the
y whole time when I was playingJT, but there was a disconnect.
s
s-
at
it
h
So on one level I got to observe it and see how people treated
JT without being connected to it personally. I was struck
by how he was always saying how shy he was and how he
didn't want people to touch him. [But] he was constantly be,
ing touched. People wanted to connect. They had connected
with the book, they were his fans, so they wanted to connect
with him and find a personal connection, because it was per,
maybe two days after the JT unveiling. Like it's kind of this
social milieu that we're obsessed with in memoir. It seems like
it's happened kind of recently... but in the last 20 years the
media is constantly creating this simulacra or that it's our gov,
ernment right now. People really want to have something that
they can say,"I know this to be true:• And maybe it's like this
obsession within the media, it's like necessary in a culturallike a pop-things that are put out culturally.
Haveyoulearnedto liveasyourseH
nowthatyou'renotJT?
I don't know if we ever do. I had this identity crisis after it all
happened, and I'm really thankful that I wrote the book. I feel
that I wouldn't have been able to process it without [that]. I
needed to really sort out what had happened for mysel£ and
why I had done this, and why I allowed it to go on or what
my obsession with it was. That chapter of my life, I feel like
I've sorted a lot of it out. I'd be at a different place-really
confused-if I hadn't written it. I wonder if I'll ever come to
a point where I feel much more comfortable with mysel£ But
also I wonder if that's just like being in your early 20s and you
just keep evolving. I wonder if you ever get to that point where
you go, "I know me!"
Is it differentreadingas Savannah
versuswhenyou'dgoto
the readingsas JT andhideundertables?
March 2009 \ 31
It was different. I feel like there was so
much preparation for JT and there was
also so much to hide behind in that ...
Laura was constantly having relationships with people and then I'd meet
them. There was all of that to think
about, then there was all of the ques,
tions to think about, then there was the
wig to put on and the sunglasses, and
I would start working myself up into
this complete anxiety. I would physically get so nervous that my muscles
would be tired because I'd be shaking
so hard. I did a reading and I got up there
and I just started to cry at one point because I'd get myself so
worked up, which I found really shocking that I could do that.
It felt like-I don't know if you ever did this as a kid-but
you would hyperventilate and then pass out. I don't have that
[anymore). I recognize the nervousness and I try to move on
from it, which ultimately is probably a healthy thing.
He was relieved, right! There was a disconnect [because) ht
was talking to JT on the phone, too. So I think he was relieved, because it's finally like it made sense.
Didanyof thesepeopleseethroughto the realyou?
I don't know. It's such a weird circumstance, where you find
yourself through being somebody else. So it's not the most
direct way, I'll say that. But I guess to trust in yourself and follow your intuitions about what you feel that you need. That's
a good, hard question. ■
Youhada boyfriendin the bookand nowyouhavea girl•
friend.So,howdoyoudefineyourself?
As queer. It's interesting, the way that JT went through allthese
different things and I relate to his kind oflike,"Well, some dar
I'm this and some days I'm that and it's fine with me and i·
should be fine with you:' But I think, ultimately, I'm queer.
Canyoutell me a little bit aboutyourclothingline?
I started making clothes about five years ago, shortly after
started beingJT. I started out doing all one-of a-kind, reconstructed garments. Now I do patterns, so I make more thar
one. But it's still in really small batches ... so that it's individua
with you and your own style. I really feel like that's the cruxthat's the obsession with clothing. It's about individuality anc a
wearing things the way you want to. I hope that older ana
younger women can wear it. Women have their own prowess when they're wearing it, but it's not really sexy in a conventional way. It could be unisex, a lot of the stuff. I feellikf
Nowyoudon'thaveto cramfor a testbeforeyourreadings. there was a connection that I made from being JT ... Thar·
On one level that was really challenging but it was also kind
my obsession with clothing: that you can put clothes on anc c
of much easier. I had some place to retreat to. I can't be like, feel completely different and say something so different abour co
"Oh I didn't know [how to answer] that question:' This is my yoursel£ I'm excited ...[about my) new project. Right now tht
life. There's nothing to cram for, but there's also nothing to line is called Tine, so this is called the T ranc. This is a line ot Ar
hide behind.
padded undergarments that you wear and you can put it on ir
OnethingyouweremostafraidofwaslosingLaura.Doyou under a Tshirt but it will either have shoulder pads, like, big be
missthatfriendship?
shoulder pads, or a hunchback, or these different little lumps. n
Yeah, I feel like we went through this experience together and
Ir's pretty out there and wild. It's more like a wearable art projit was really intimate. She's told her side of the story. I thought
ect. It's exciting because it's encompassing so many of the dif- w
that the Paris Review article was really-they covered so much
ferent themes that I love but without the commercialism of ro
ground in it. And then also through her trial. I feel like it's so trying to make something that a boutique would buy.
weird for me to be talking about it. But she's not involved this
I feel for the peoplelike CarrieFisher,who was motherlyB
time. I wonder what will happen between us. At this point
towardyou.Howdidyoucopewith thosesituations?
p
we're not really talking. And I don't know, it's weird.
It was really hard. It was one of the hardest parts. I went "P.
Haveyouhadcontactwith any of the celebritiesthat you through it so many times: This is so weird I need to quit. Ir
hobnobbed
with?
was always that one [thing) that I couldn't get around. I really, D
I haven't had much contact with anybody from that world,
really admire Carrie Fisher. I admire her as an artist and I just h
which is another kind of interesting phenomenon. I think it's think she's a really strong, amazing person, and she did rake h
partly just that everyone was always contacting JT through
us in and take us under her wing and bought me cough syrup a
email and phone and that was all through Laura. So I've had
for my cough. You know, she was amazing. I felt like.. .I have o
very minimal contact with people. But I feel like the people
nothing to give you that's mine and so I kind of show her my
that I have come across and reconnected with-there's this
tits because it's like a personal secret or something. But she's c
connection there that I had been wondering about.
actually one of the only people that I tried to contact and I
You're really frank about your relationshipwith Asia went and saw her play and it was so great. We talked a little
Argento.It seemsas thoughyou'repondering
throughout bit. I think she understood that there were a lot of different s
the bookwhetheror notshereallyknowsyou.
layers to it. I don't want to put words in her mouth but I'm
Yeah, that was what was constantly going through my mind
glad that I went and saw her. I really admire her.
with everybody I ended up making a connection with. But Yourstoryis reallyabouta youngwomanfindingherseH.
especially her.
Is thereonelessonyou'dwantto passon ?
li
I have one friend that I made that I've kept. A guy named Ben
Foster who's an actor. It was really interesting to hear everything from his side, his perspective on it.
Benwas kindof relieved.
32
I curve
r
Di
ti<
A
ht
'SADDLEUP
rl-
ese
AN AFFORDABLE WEEK IN THE CALIFORNIA BACKCOUNTRY SHOWS
ONE COWGIRL HOW TO SWAGGER. BY MELISSA FONDAKOWSKI
y
WHEN I TOLD my friend I was going on a
horse drive through the California backcountry,
she said, "Oh, like BrokebackMountain!"
"Sure;' I replied, "but without the sheep and
the sordid love affair:' It would also be without the
knowledge that I could handle backcountry camping
and rough-terrain riding. To date, I'd only car-camped
nc and rode horses in a ring. But I wanted to be like Ennis, like
nc Jack: I didn't just want to finish the drive. I wanted to love it.
w
I mailed in my nonrefundable $980 trip fee way in advance,
n- so I couldn't back out. Of course, I spent the next three months
'ke practicing my cinch knots on leftover Christmas ribbon, pret. tending the arm of the sofa was a stirrup and mounting the
couch. I set up and repacked my tent 20 times, to be sure I
m could do it without looking stupid.
he
ot Arrival:In addition to many basic fears, I had one slightly
irrational one: that on a bathroom break I would be left
ig behind a 5-foot sagebrush wall, my bare bum in the air with
s. no paper to wipe, as the cowboys ushered the herd away.
~But there would be none of that. These backcountry trips,
if- which might be intimidating to some city slickers, aren't
of rough at all. At each camp, in addition to the chuck wagon,
the crew set up a four-stall lavatory, affectionately named the
ly Buck-a-Roo Loo, replete with biodegradable recycled toilet
paper, sinks and soap, which lent new meaning to the phrase
nt "pack it in, pack it out:'
on
Ir
ly, DayOne:Normally, I would have been insulted to be assigned a
sr horse named Wimpy, but we were about to release the anxious
e herd from its pasture and I was too excited to care. Mounting
a horse from the ground requires special skill and I noticed
others using anything they could find to get up: rocks, felled
trees-other people. With one swift push off the shoulder of a
cute cowpoke, I settled into the squeaky leather.
Wimpy, of course, was no such thing. She was a sure-footed
mare with a fast fifth gear. And after 18 grueling miles over
some of the dustiest terrain I'd ever had the displeasure of
inhaling, I was the one who was feeling wimpy. We arrived at
camp as the sun was setting, covered in dust and looking like
a bunch of tired criminals, masked in kerchiefs. If every day is
like this, I won't make it, I thought. I fell asleep-passed out,
d really-too tired to notice the blisters on my bum.
DayTwo:I felt them in the morning though. Luckily, in addition to hearty meals the chuck wagon offered brilliant first aid.
After some diaper-rash cream and Band Aids, I was ready to
get back on my horse. All I could think about on the second
day was the promise of our next camp at Crowley Lake-a hot
spring. Unfortunately, in the high desert in June, hot springs
are still cold-barely 50 degrees. I plunged in anyway. By now,
the dust was thick, as even as a fake tan, and my desire to wash
it off far outweighed the shock of the cold.
DayThree:After miles of driving the herd over flat, fresh pastures
we camped at a cattle ranch. We gorged on steak, beans and
cornbread and talked about the freedom of galloping through
the wide-open space. I finally started to feel an easiness in my
body, a pride: the slow,sure swagger of any unhurried cowgirl.
DayFour:On our last night in the woods, we camped in a cattle
bone yard and celebrated ourselves around a blazing campfire.
We'd made it to the final leg of the trip safely.The sky was so
clear I could see every star. The cry of coyotes edging toward
the decaying carcasses in the bone yard crept ever closer. But I
slept unafraid, more peacefully than I had in a while. Every fear
I'd had about the trip and my own abilities had disappeared.
DayFive:Packing up camp seemed to take an extra long time. I
don't think any of us were ready to leave.A little mournfully, we
mounted our ponies for the last time and, single file, made our
way up the breathtaking and slightly scary trail along a ravine
to our supplier's base camp, Mammoth Lakes Pack Outfit.
After a final lunch we headed home. I looked at myself in
the rearview mirror. My skin was clear, my expression open
and confident. I was who I hoped I'd be-and then some. ■
alo
ers;
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N YOUR WAY to Cairns, Australia, start
in Sydney. Australia's most populous city is like London on
sunshine and happy pills. Run around the city-check out
the iconic Opera House, go to Bondi Beach, find a bar. Order
a local beer and drink with the Aussies-they are particularly
good at having fun. Make friends with locals or fellow travel,
ers; let them take you anywhere and ride it out for as long as
it lasts.
Next, rent a car and drive up the eastern coast to Byron Bay,
the mystical gateway to Cairns. This will take you two days.
Start early on the first day, and stop in the midafternoon. Find
accommodations anywhere near the beach. Spend the rest of
the afternoon at the ocean behaving like a child-the warm
water, the waves and the sun will induce a state of presentness
that may feel like a memory you've never had.
The next day, continue your drive to Byron Bay, the
once,secret hippie town. Byron Bay proper will be filled
with tourists, so stay at a bed,and,breakfast outside of town.
Cairns is still a ways away, but you will need the medicine
of this landscape, this crossroads where rolling green coun,
tryside meets the rainforest and the ocean. The next day, get
directions to a quiet beach. Go there and observe that you can
see no one for miles in each direction.
You can get to Brisbane in two hours. From there, take a
cheap, quick flight to Cairns. When you arrive in Cairns, stay
at any motel in town for the night. In the morning, take your
bags and wait for your ride into the rainforest. Yes, your ride.
Before you get to Cairns, find a good hostel to stay at, right
on the ocean, one that will pick you up and whisk you away
to your hideout in the jungle. Choose a company that offers
things to do-walks in the rainforest, night hikes, daylong
boat trips to the ree£ Here is your trip to Cairns.
Stay in the rainforest, because this is what Cairns has to
offer, because it still exists, because it bumps right up against
the ocean and because this part of the ocean is home to the
Great Barrier Ree£ The hostels are self contained and civi,
lized; there's food, and the Internet, and some even have pools
and private rooms with air conditioning. Stay in the rainforest
because you'll be checking your email at the outdoor cafe one
night and a giant butterfly-bigger than your hand-might
perch gently on top of your computer and check you out for
a minute.
Everything here is self sufficient and wild. The trees have
arms that can wrap themselves around other plants and con,
sume them. If you go off the beaten path, you can walk into
the forest, turn around twice and be instantly lost. You will
not be accustomed to the patterns here-the
colors, loops
and textures will draw you farther in. There are vines that
have teeth and will catch you if you brush up against them.
There are wild crocodiles. But this is why you're staying in the
safety of the hostel, with guided help.
Take the boat trip that the hostel offers. The smaller and
more modest the boat, the better. It takes roughly an hour
by boat to get to the Great Barrier Reef. You can't touch any,
thing on the ree£ but you can spend the afternoon snorkeling
and taking it all in-you will see the light aqua color of the
water against the eastern horizon, the ancient vibrant colors
of the coral and strange fish. You'll witness the perfectly white
sandbar in the middle of the ocean that only the sea birds
walk on. And you'll forget where you are-inside one of the
mysteries of the world, swimming along a reef so big that it
can be seen from outer space. If the captain offers a scuba
class for some extra dough, do it. They'll give you the gear and
an introductory dive class right there. Fifteen feet below the
surface, your instructor might suddenly pass you a giant sea
cucumber. Your hands will instantly, intuitively assess it and
gather information.
You'll thank yourself for choosing the smaller boat when
on the ride back to the shore the captain turns off the motor
and lets all 10 of you take turns jumping off the roof of the
boat and into the water in the late,afternoon sun. You won't
even be cold. You'll laugh with strangers, eat tuna sandwiches
and salty chips, hit land and go back to your room for a shower.
You'll get into bed and sleep very hard-and
finally you'll
dream your dreams in the belly of the rainforest, the world
reimagined inside of you. ■
ing
Thi
PARASAILING
ADVENTURES
Ba
un
of
AREA GREAT
WAYTO REALLY
SEEALL OF
A CITY.
0 THERE I WAS, sitting under a thatched beach
umbrella, reading a terrific book in what was, for
me, a rare state of total relaxation at the Hotel Villa
Mexicana on La Rapa Beach in Zihuatanejo, Mexico.
My girlfriend, Tracy, her parents and I were spending a few days there before heading to Troncones for
Tracy's sister's wedding. Sitting under that umbrella
was like starring in my own personal Corona commercial, though my beverage of choice was a wonderful Mexican
brew called Victoria. Occasionally, local merchants would
approach us selling jewelry, pottery and other assorted treasures. We allbought something-it was hard not to. The wares
were gorgeous and the locals were charming salespeople.
But then I saw something on the beach that really caught
my eye, and before I knew what was happening I was negotiating with two men who were offering to take me parasailing
in my rusty college Spanish. Parasailing? Had I gotten too
much sun? Normally, such a thing is the stuff of scary dreams,
not something I'd actually do voluntarily. But apparently, fate,
destiny or some other force of nature was calling the shots
that day. So I surrendered, spellbound under the Mexican
sky. The adventure would cost just $25. The experience was,
however, priceless.
After a brief safety tutorial, I was strapped into the harness
and told to hold on as the powerboat moored a few yards away
roared to life. I was airborne almost instantaneously. I kept
rising higher and higher. How high, I can't say for sure. But I
can tell you that I was just a speck in the sky in some of the
36
Icurve
photos Tracy snapped from the ground. Usually, I'm afraid 01
heights. But something came over me on that particular da)
in that particular moment, and I will never forget the feeling
I have never been more at peace in my entire life than when •
was soaring in that Zihuatanejo sky. I thought for sure I had
packed it, but apparently I had left fear back home.
The boat took me along the beach and around a bend
which afforded stunning views. On the way back, a bird, some
kind of gull, flew beneath me and left a wake of turbulence ir
up
sal
on
Cl
an
ins
R
th
an
a
OV
n
w
h
COi
its path. I've never seen anything like it or heard anything like
the whooshing sound it made some 15 feet below me. I could
fr
have stayed up there indefinitely. Two shrill whistle blows
however, soon cued me to prepare for landing. This experiat
ence was a touchstone for me in that I realized that I really
do have the capacity to be one with nature, to know absolute
peace and to live truly in the present tense.
dti
The rest of the trip was incredible. Highlights included
Sl
the lovely beachside wedding, the sound of the waves crashhe
ing at night, the local cuisine, shell-collecting treks, dreamlike sunsets and so much more. We even found a baby turtle
that had lost its way and returned it to the sea. It's the parasailing, though, that has its own private place in my memory._
[AimselL.Ponti]
N MY LAST YEAR of college, my roommate, Claire,
suggested we "go away" for spring break, like so many of
our private-school classmates often did.
"We need a break;' she said. Yes, we needed a
break. She knew some people, she said. Are we talking about a vacation or a mob hit?
"We only have to worry about paying for gas;' she said.
This was a lot less of a financial burden in the 1990s.
"So where are we going?" I asked.
"Florida;' she said.
I remember the drive well: alternating Dave Matthews and
Barenaked Ladies CDs, eating gummy bears and Laffy Taffy
until we were sick, going through our stash of different kinds
of cigarettes on the dash. We had somehow reasoned that
0
,
,
'
1
1
e
s.
d
Y·
when our throats were scratchy and sore (from smoking too
much, of course), the most logical cure would be to smoke a
menthol. After all, what ingredient did most throat lozenges
have in common? Ding. Ding. Ding. Menthol. At least we
were creative in justifying our addiction.
We arrived in Bradenton on a Friday afternoon. I hung
my head out the window of Claire's blue Cavalier and looked
up at the palm trees whizzing by. I could smell and taste the
salt in the air, and when we stopped on the gulf and walked
on the beach, I couldn't stop saying "Wow!" At one point,
Claire looked over at a couple who had been staring at us
and said, "First time seeing the ocean:' They smiled and I was
instantly reminded of that scene in Pretty Woman where Julia
Roberts has a similar reaction when she rides the elevator to
the penthouse. (Did I just make myself the prostitute in that
analogy? Well, you get the point.)
As it turns out, half of Claire's "people" was her gram,
a petite woman who spent her days in her housecoat, wore
oversize costume jewelry all the time and made a mean fuzzy
navel with fresh orange juice. The other half of Claire's people
was a short, balding man named Ted. He was Gram's third
husband and I spent the first few days of our trip assuming he
couldn't speak, only because he chose not to, ever.
I saw the sign for the parasailing company on our way back
from shopping near the beach. Claire and I were in the backseat, Ted and Gram in the front. I elbowed Claire and pointed
at the sign. "But you're afraid of heights;' she said.
Yes, I am afraid of heights.
"There are a lot of sharks in the bay;' she said. From the
driver's seat, Ted spoke for what may have been the first time
since we arrived, five days earlier. ''A lot of sharks in the bay;'
he echoed.
"Don't listen to this old fuddy-duddy;' Gram said. "Turn
around:'
Ted quietly obliged, as usual, and before long I was paying
my $55 to the counter man at a local parasailing outfitter. You
will soon understand why I am withholding the name. I had
paid my money and hadn't yet puked in the ladies' room when
they called my name.
"You're coming out on the boat with me, right?" I asked
Claire.
"Yeah, on the boat. I'll take pictures. You're crazy;' she said.
Yes, I am, a little.
We boarded the boat with a bald man and a man in a red
bandana (I'll call them Mr. Clean and Red Bandana). I quite
honestly don't remember their real names-although
by the
time we made it back to shore, I was calling them names
much more colorful than anything their mothers could have
dreamed of.
The get-up (harness, parachute and such) was apparently quite
amusing. Claire would not stop taking pictures and laughing.
''Are you ready?" asked Red Bandana.
I nodded.
''Are you sure?" asked Claire.
I nodded again.
"Let's get this over with;' I said.
I must say that the first 200 feet of the 600-foot journey
were incredible. The water was a clear glass-green that seemed
bottomless. The sky was blue and there was a gentle breeze. I
could see Claire waving from the boat. I looked to the docks
and saw Gram waving wildly and Ted looking on, his hands
in the pockets of his khaki shorts. I truly felt as ifl were flying.
And then I looked at the rope-the one that was keeping me
from flying off into oblivion and sinking into the water to be
lunch for the sharks, my lifeline to my new best friends, Red
Bandana and Mr. Clean-and I saw something that looked
an awful lot like duct tape wrapped tightly around it. Duct
tape. I could feel a panic attack brewing. I looked around and
it was like I realized for the first time that I was in the air.
FlymgHigh continuedon page63
March 2009
I 37
BUDGET VACATION~
squa
and
out
rece
see
and
Bou
plac
or a
asw
rum
AMERICA'S
RIVIERA
BY CATHERINE
PLATO
N MY EIGHT
of William Randolph Hearst and lots of beaches where sea
YEARS of living on the California
lions and surfer girls lounge in the sand. Inland, farms and
coast, I had never really gotten to know the majority
of it. I'd lived in Los Angeles and San Francisco, but
vineyards stretch for miles.
Researching the trip beforehand, I couldn't find much that
my knowledge of the 400 miles of coastland in between consisted of what I had read in novels by was specifically"gay"about Santa Barbara. The city is considered generally gay-friendly, but is known more for its scenery.
Jack Kerouac and John Steinbeck and seen in the
movie Sideways.As a Californian who loves wine, sunshine
cuisine and overall quality of life than for the crazy nightlife
and anything pretentiously faux-French, I figured I owed
that you usually find in a gay mecca. Our first night there,
myself a trip to the region nicknamed the American Riviera. instead of searching out the gay bars ( they do exist), we
Santa Barbara, surrounded by wine country and situated 95 decide to have dinner at Bouchon, a cozy, candlelit restaurant
miles up the coast from Los Angeles,
in Santa Barbara's walkable downtown
WHERE
TOSTAY
is apparently where stars like Oprah
Great for anyone who wants a real taste
Winfrey, John T ravolta and Brad Pitt
of local California cuisine, Bouchon
TheFranciscan
Inn:Welovedthis
go to escape the "Hollywood scene:'
hotel,withitslarge,comfortable
rooms relies on local produce, fish and meat,
anda hottub.Thebeachisjusta short and its extensive wine list includes a secAlong with my old college roommate
walkaway.
Marian-a San Diego native, Bay Area
tion devoted to Santa Barbara wines.
resident and fellow American Riviera
Marian and I eyeballed the menu and,
virgin - I decided to escape the San
since we're both vegetarians, we got
Francisco scene with a road trip down
Bouchon:
Greatambience
andamazing a little nervous that the only choices
the coast. For us city dwellers, the midfoodandwinewitha decidedly
local
were chicken, venison, lamb and other
flair.I feltlikeI waseatingfroma vegdle of the state was about as mysterious
dishes made from creatures that once
etablegardenintherestaurant's
back- had faces and roamed the fields we had
as the middle of the country. To get a
yard.Theservicewasalsoexceptional. just driven through. But when we asked
feel for this 400-mile stretch, we drove
down the Pacific Coast Highway. If
NaturalCafe:Thislocalchainhasgreat, our server for veggie options, he was
you ever have a chance to do this, you
cheap,healthy
andsort-of-healthy extremely accommodating. We each
options
forvegetarians
aswellasthose listed our favorite vegetables, he told us
must: The view from every other turn
whoeatfishandchicken.
Weateatthe
looks like the page of a calendar, and the
what was in season, then showed up with
restaurant
onStateStreet,butthereare unique, meatless creations made just to
route passes through the breathtaking
eightotherlocations.
region of Big Sur, the stunning estate
suit our individual tastes: sweet pureed
38
Icurve
and
phy.
the
frol
are!
lS
to
tha
Hu
De
Clo
gay
Sh
the
TIMESTOVISIT
squash and an array of lightly steamed
see, and in a perfect state of relaxation,
SantaBarbara
hasa Mediterranean
cliand sauteed local vegetables. It turned
where
I could either have passed out at
mate,soyoudon'tneedto worryabout
out to be one of my favorite meals of
the hotel or kept on going, depending
nastyweatherwhenyou'replanning
recent memory. From our table we could
yourtrip,butyoumaywantto goduring what we found next. We decided to
see other people's flesh-covered plates
check out a bar on the pier that we had
oneofthesefestivals:
and I'll admit those looked great, too.
walked
by earlier in the day.
TheSantaBarbaraWomen'sLiterary
Bouchon (French for "cork") is the first
A great thing about Santa Barbara
Festival:Thisone-day
festivalin late
place I would bring my food-snob father
is that most destinations are walkable,
February
celebrates
"diversity,
literacy
or a date I'd like to impress. Dessert was
and the weather is often nice enough
andsocialjustice"withreadings
and
a sweet apple tart served with a caramelthat you actually want to walk everylectures
byacclaimed
femaleauthors.
rum sauce and cinnamon ice cream and,
Featured
authors
in thepasthave
where. Generally, we felt quite safe
included
queer-community
favorites
like the rest of the meal, it felt very fresh
walking around at night, though we did
Rebecca
WalkerandKatiaNoyes.
and homemade-as
if the fruit had
have one local guy scream "Dykes!" at
been picked from a backyard orchard.
us as we held hands trekking through
PacificPrideFestival:Don'texpect
The next morning, we stumbled out
downtown. The reason it wasn't more
to partyas hardasyouwouldin the
of our rooms, downed black coffee and
biggerCalifornia
cities-but sinceSanta alarming was because he was drunk
Barbara
Pridedoesn'thappenuntilJuly, and shakily riding a unicycle. Before
arrived at the pier ( a few blocks' walk
youcanhitit afterthefanfarehasdied
from the hotel) for our morning whaleI could write off the city as a nasty
downin LosAngeles
andSanFrancisco. hotbed of homophobia, Marian rewatching expedition. Fooled by the sunshine streaming through our hotel winOUTrageous!
FilmFestival:Founded minded me that there are drunken
dow, we wore T-shirts and packed light
in 1992,SantaBarbara's
ownfour-day
lunatics everywhere. She was right.
LGBT
filmfesttakesplaceeveryyear
sweatshirts. But we were completely
The second most offensive thing that
in November.
wrong and ended up shivering throughhappened all weekend was at the next
out the entire four-hour expedition. I
bar we stopped into, where some
brought a cup of coffee along with me hoping it would keep
tipsy frat boys threw popcorn at us in an awkward, adolesme warm, but 10 minutes into the voyage through the choppy
cently flirtatious way, then offered to buy us drinks. We
Pacific Ocean, I was wearing my beverage, and it was cold by accepted, and then sauntered away to a private table, without
then, too. If you go, bring more clothing than you think you'll
them. Not so bad.
need. Though I wish I'd brought a down jacket, the Captain
While it doesn't wear a rainbow-colored heart on its sleeve,
Condor cruise was an awesome way to spend our morning,
the way its larger coastal cousins might, Santa Barbara offers
and was certainly worth getting out of bed early for. Minor
visitors-be they Oprah or a couple of San Francisco dykesphysical discomfort melted away as we oohed and aahed over a great escape from big-city life and some of the best food and
the first gray whales we spotted, followed by a small pod of
scenery the Golden State has to offer. My final advice to travfrolicking dolphins. Santa Barbarians, as I like to call them,
elers: Always take the scenic route, walk whenever possible,
are lucky because they get to see sea life year round: migrating
dress in more layers than you think you'll need and ignore the
gray whales in December through April, and humpback and
man on the unicycle. The rest of the people in Santa Barbara
blue whales the rest of the year. Porpoises, sea lions as well as are pretty nice. ■
various species of dolphin ( all of which looked the same to
me) are also visible for most of the year.
We spent our afternoon wandering State Street, which
is comparable to the main thoroughfare of other college
towns-shops, restaurants, bars and coffee shops-but with
that certain special California flair (hippies hitchhiking to
Humboldt). Shops worth stopping into included the Book
Den, a locally loved, independent used book store, and the
Closet, a cool vintage store with a name that nicely lends itself to
gay puns. The Blue Bee and Victorian Vogue & the Costume
Shoppe, both on State Street, are other places locals told us
they love to shop.
Slightly drunk and giggly from our evening martinis, too
much sugar and an excess of daytime sunshine, Marian and
I wandered back down State Street toward the beach, hand
in hand. It was dark and packs of college-age kids and older
couples shuffled down the street as dinnertime was ending
and the night was getting started. I felt comfortably full, still
happy and in awe over the stupid dolphins I froze my ass off to
HERE DO THE cool dykes go in Paris? You
have to be tipped off with a text from les lesbiennes
cools, la jetset mechante.
In Berlin, you can jump in a cab and say,"Take me to
a dyke bar;' and immediately get laid twice by extremely
hot chicks. But in Paris, the driver might drop you at a
place with three snooty lesbians, each tres skinny, sipping
cognac and shooting you dirty looks.
The one Parisian dyke club where all the hipsters went
every weekend, the world-famous Le Pulp, closed last year.
There, for the last two decades, you could have seen chick
bands and stayed to dance afterward, getting high on piles
of cocaine spoon-fed to you in back rooms by some leatherclad motor scooter butches with long hair, then got a measly
square of butcher paper at the door to the restrooms from
a cute, anorexic, punk boy with a pincushion for a face and
sipped $10 drinks until 5 a.m.
Now, you have to know where to search on MySpace
for this week's fabulous party. If you're looking for queer
burlesque, dancing, rock and electro shows, dinner or a wellknown American dyke band on tour, it all happens on boats
called peniches (pronounced pay-neesh) and in clubs.
Most of the parties are mixed. It's a very queer scene.
Dykes, fags, les trans and gender nonconformists all seem to
hang together. There are 72 transpedegouines ( transfagsdykes,
meaning alternativequeers). If one of them moves to Berlin,
the rest of them know that there are now 71.
For an intellectually stimulating and deliciously cheap
dinner, check out Queer Food for Love. Once a month, Les
40
I curve
Pantheres Roses rents a storefront restaurant in an alley,
where you can share the prix fixe vegan menu prepared by
transpedegouines in a tiny kitchen and served to 10 picnic
tables crammed into a minuscule dining room. You're sitting
on top of one another, so you have no choice but to socialize.
Dinner costs about $12, and your tablemates will gladly discuss queer feminist politics in English, if you so desire.
If you want to go strictly lesbian, you can check out Chez
Maune in Pigalle, the red light district, where the ladies are
stuck in the 1980s. It's a time warp with historical decor.
There is nothing more charming than a big gay party on
a peniche that's sitting low in the Seine, scintillating with ~
fairy lights and fairies. Inside, there may be porno flicks, DJs,~
rope tricks or drag king shows. You never know on a peniche. ~
I-Besides, it's fun to say peniche.
~
[IJ
Sometimes, you have to go to a straight club where there ffi
just happens to be a lesbian or queer show. Rock clubs like La~
Cigale, Le Bataclan or La Fleche d'Or don't have dyke bounc· ~
ers, but if you turn on the charm you can still shoulder your ~
z
way to the front to mingle with the French babes and soak up ~
the likes of the Gossip, Scream Club, the Dresden Dolls, the ~
Cliks or K.T. Tunstall.
§
There is a strong lesbian feminist presence in Paris. These
women throw dungeon parties and heatedly discuss modern
feminist issues like trans inclusion. You can find cheap ~
(/)
pisse debouts (literally "piss standing up"), the Travelmate ~
equivalent. A dyke named Killer has them for three euros. ~
z
Ask around.
~
At Butch Is Beautiful, a new party with performances, ;j_
i
!
LOVIN' THE 'BUSH
concerts and videos, all kinds of cute butches and femmes
come out of the closet. Paris is finally discovering gender
nonconformity. It could use some good old American role
models. And there is something called a Mustache Party,
where people of all genders sport upper-lip merkins.
Le Marais, the medieval gay part of town, is perfect
for romantic make-out strolls past 500-year-old buildings with exposed beams. It's the Parisian Castro or
Greenwich Village. You'll see queers everywhere, as well
as queer shops like Dollhouse, the dyke sex shop, where
you can sit in on a spanking workshop in English, then
buy French sex toys and lingerie, which are way classier
than ours. Fuzzier. Pinker.
Shop 'til you drop in on a queer sidewalk cafe to enjoy
cognac or Bordeaux, espresso or Perrier, and relax on a
summer evening. Whether you're gazing into the eyes of
the hottie you picked up the night before at Le Nyx or
watching the Parisian babe parade, it doesn't get any better
than this. ■
WHILE
INFRANCE
HOTBURLESQUE
ACTSTOCATCH
• TheDragKingFemmeShow.Hilarious
andsexy.
Mostlyqueercrowd.myspace.com/dkfs
ey,
by
• LesKissesCauseTrouble.
Queercomedy,
cutefatgirls,
tattoos.
Mixedcrowd.myspace.com/kissescausetrouble
• LeCabaretdesFlllesde Joie.
Hotshowgirls
onstage,
some
ofthemdykes.Mixedcrowd.
myspace.com/
lecabaretdesfillesdejoie
HOTLOCAL
ROCK
ACTS
• TheFlaming
Pussy
• Deborah
Degouts
• Process
• Anatomie
Bousculaire
INLEMARAIS:
• l'AOC.Forfancylesbians.
Appears
to bea common
French
cafe.In fact,upscale.
• le 3 Kafe.Lesbianbar.For18-to 3O-year-olds.
Dancing.
Drinks.Connections.
• le yx Cafe.LesbianBar.Dancing.
Techno.
• Dollhouse.
Fancysexshopforgirls.
• le ouffl urs.A straightbarwherepartieslike
ButchIs Beautiful
happen.
• le Yono.A straightbarwhereMustache
Parties
happen
monthly.
• le RiveGauche.A nightclub
somewhere
onthe
LeftBank.Forolderlesbians.
IN BELLEVILLE
th nei hborhood
forstudents
and rtists:
L'Okubl.LaRotisserie.
QueerFoodforLovehappens
heremonthly.
>> Formoreinfoonvisiting,
logonto paris-gay.com.
WHAT WOMEN WANT IS AT BREITENBUSH
HOT SPRINGS. BYAISLINN CLEVENGER
VER THE RIVER and through the woods-to
perhaps
the farthest from grandmother's house one could go-lies
Breitenbush Hot Springs. Nestled in an old-growth forest 10 miles from the
nearest town and 90 miles from super-queer-friendly Portland, Ore., this profoundly beautiful retreat is a unique place for women who want to get away
from it all and renew themselves. I have been blessed with the opportunity to
visit Breitenbush many summers, when my mother fills in for full-time staff
members on vacation.
The 'Bush, as devotees affectionately call it, is a place to nurture my mind,
body and soul. Breitenbush also offers over 150 workshops, conferences and
gatherings every year. While most of these workshops are open to any gender,
there are many that cater specifically to women. My visits, however, consist of
simple relaxation.
To me, there is nothing better than waking early, strolling through the
ancient trees to one of the various hot springs and easing my body into the
healing waters (clothing-optional). The three meadow pools, which are lined
with smooth river rocks, look out over a field of tall grass that gently slopes
down to the Breitenbush River. Relaxing to the sound of the rushing water is
an amazing way to start the day. A short distance away, the four tiled spiral
tubs face each of the four directions. A plunge into the cold-water tub after
cooking in one of the hot ones is incredibly invigorating-it brings every part
of me to life.
After a soak, a walk on the gravel paths leads me to the historic lodge that
houses the dining room. My mouth waters as soon as I get to the buffet-style
food, which is vegetarian, mostly organic and caters to special diets. Being
gluten-intolerant, I am always grateful to find a gluten-free version of the main
dish. The lodge also houses the library and the north wing, where a majority
of the workshops and concerts are held. With my tummy full, I am fond of
curling up with a book on the large, comfy couch in the library and drifting
into a lazy sleep until lunch time.
After lunch, I like to awaken my senses by taking a hike. The way the sun
streams through the Emerald Forest and highlights the vine maple leaves is
majestic. The two-and-a-half-mile Spotted Owl Trail Loop is my favorite if
I want to take my time, but the Emerald Forest Trail offers a more ambitious
five-mile hike that usually gets me back right on time for dinner.
If no concert or activity is planned after dinner, I treat myself to one of the
Lovin' the 'Bush continued on page 63
March 2009
I41
Velvety voiced vixen Rose Rollins may have slipped below our radar with early bit
parts in TV shows like The West Wing and films such as Mission Impossible Ill, but
with her turn as the guarded yet venerable Captain Tasha Williams in season four of
The L Word, she has firmly entrenched herself on our must-watch list. Since Rollins
joined the cast, her character has dealt with post-traumatic stress disorder from a
tour in Iraq, faced off with Kelly McGillis in a court of law, justified the introduction
of the oft-maligned Papi and swept Alice Pieszecki-along
with the audience-off
her feet with that husky, criminally sexy laugh of hers. She was even able to successfully pull off the cringe-tastic pseudopolitical line: "Shut up, please, your bush
is the only bush I want to think about right now." (Shame on you, Ilene Chaiken.)
And while Rollins also showed plenty of chutzpah in her role as resident badass
sociopath Monique Jones in out director Angela Robinson's online series Girltrash!,
we are happy to report that the real-life Rollins is just as friendly and down to earth
as a fangirl could hope for. As the final season of The L Word was set to air, she
shared what it meant to her to play a veteran in a time of war, why she hopes for an
L Word movie and how the story line she wanted was too controversial for TV.
•
ay1n
Nowthat TheL Wordis enteringits sixthandfinal
season,howdoyoufeelabouttheshowending?
Well, I think it's bittersweet. It was such a great experience for me-like, my ultimate experience so far working as an actor-just working with all these talented
women. But it's definitely time for it to end. I mean, it's
been six years and it's better to go out on a high note
than to go out because no one is watching it.
have time to listen to their stories. And I definitely
want to come across as authentic as possible. And I
did feel a definite sense of responsibility, and I also
felt chat...just remembering that I still am an actor
and I am doing my best, but I definitely took it very
seriously-and so did they.
In seasonfive,Tashahadto facea verydifficultdecisionfor someone
whois so definedby her miliAre you happywith wherethe storyleavesyour tary career.In the end,shechoseto leaverather
character,
Tasha?
thanlie.Doyouagreewith herdecision?
Um, no, to be honest. [Laughs]I feel like a lot of ques- I feel that I would have done the same thing. Not
tions might go unanswered, and I don't know-we'll
see how the fans react, but it will definitely be interesting. I think that the note that the show ends on
could be quite controversial.
necessarily that I would be doing it for love, but just
for my beliefs. It's like, why would you want to risk
your life for anyone-no matter if [it's] the government or any movement-who is not going to appreSpeakingof controversial,
youplaya veryvisible ciate you for who you are, and for what you're doing?
veteranin a time whenwe havemorefemalevet- And be ignorant enough to judge and feel that you're
eransthanever.Doyoufeel a lot of responsibility not worthy to be risking your life for them? I feel like
in that role?
that's the biggest insult ever. Why would I want to
Definitely, and even when I meet women who have fight for someone like that?
gone through the same thing, it's just like I always Howelsedidbeingon TheL Wordchangeyourlife?
42
I curve
It definitely was the first opportunity for me to live
my life comfortably through acting (alone]. I've always
had other jobs-other
means of employment-until
this show, so it definitely was my first breakthrough
show, to finally establish myself as a working actor. It
was a great ride and great opportunity, but I still feel
that it's the beginning-it's definitely the beginning.
Now I feel like I can just be taken a little more seriously as an actor, but I have so far to go.
Doyouhaveanyfilm or TVprojectscomingup?
No, actually, it's pretty weird out there. There is not
much going on because of the impending strike and
hopefully [that] doesn't happen. I just got new representation across the board and were building a plan
for me to get back out there. It's pretty intense out
there right now-it's not easy. It's kind of"back to the
might be a little too controversial. But I chink someone needs to give that story legs.
Did beingon The L Wordin any way make you
questionyourownsexualidentity?
[Laughs]Oh my gosh, that's funny! I don't know how
to answer chat. I mean, everyone always has questions
at some point in their life. I don't know how co answer
this (and be] politically correct. [Laughs]I don't think
it has, no. I chink I am coming out kind of the same
person chat I was going in. It's been a great experience
and I've always been open. I feel like it's not really two
drawing board:' [Laughs]
worlds-it's
all one world.
Is thatsomething
thatchangedas a resultof being
onthe show?
No, no. I've always felt like that, and because I'm sobecause I'm such a tomboy, I've been mistaken for a
lesbian before I even had the role of Tasha. [Laughs]
Andhowis it now?Canyougo anywherewithout
So far, everyoneis very tight-lippedaboutthe as
fans?
yetuntitledL Wordspin-off,butis thereanychance the screaming
Yeah, I still can. You know, what's funny is that it
we'll getto seeTashamakean appearance?
depends on how I wear my hair, Ir's really funny.
When I wear my hair back I (get] four times the
amount [of attention] than when I wear my hair
show has to get picked up.
down, or when I am looking a little more girly. I
Onthe topic of not closingdoors,we haveheard
guess I am unrecognizable until someone hears me
rumorsof a possibleL Wordfilm.ls thereanytruth
speak or something. It's pretty interesting how difto the rumors?
ferent fans identify me. I do notice chat when I'm
Well, there definitely has been talk, but we still don't
in New York-because I am in New York a lot-I
know. It's still all up in the air, but hopefully it will
definitely get approached a lot more than when I
happen.
am in L.A., which is odd. I would have thought it
Maybe. (I] definitely wouldn't close chat door. I mean,
we never know. I can't answer"definitely" yet. First the
"IfeelthatIwould
have
[leftthe
military
ifIwere
in
Tasha's
position].
It's
like,whywould
you
want
toriskyour
life
foranyone
...whois
notgoing
toappreciateyouforwhoyou
are,andforwhat
you're
doing?
Ifeel
likethat's
thebiggest
insult
ever:'
Is that something
youwouldbe interestedin revisingyourrolefor?
would be the opposite.
Whilewe're on the subjectof screamingfans,we
got to speakto JenniferBealsa coupleof weeks
ago,andshespokepassionately
aboutcampaigning for Obama.Wereyou involvedat all with the
really wrap things up.
Evenif that doespanout,for nowyouare bidding campaign?
the characteradieu.Whatdo youthinkyou'rego- Yeah, yeah.
We'reyouhappywiththe resultofthe election,and
ingto missmostaboutplayingTasha?
howwasthat experience?
It's just great being able to play a character who you
Yeah, definitely, I would definitely be interested in
that because I feel like we owe it to our characters and
we also owe it co the fans to just really, really, really,
respect and you know so well. I just had so much
fun-she was just really easy for me and just very
close co me, this character. I am going to miss everything about her.
Definitely. I mean, anything that we could do to be
part of this huge movement-I
was just honored.
We all went out to Philly to help with a fundraiser,
so that was great experience, and Jennifer is definitely
passionate about it all. She definitely influenced and
The L Wordwas never shy abouttacklingcontroversialtopics,but were there any story lines inspired me as well.
Were you surprised by the outcome of the
that just didn'thappen,or that youwish hadbeen
Proposition
8?
fleshedoutmore?
There was always a story line that I wanted to [do],
and Leisha (did] also, but I felt that it would have just
been a little too controversial because of us being a
bi-racial couple. We wanted see if we could explore
domestic violence among same-sex partnerships. I
think that it's a lot more prevalent than people would
assume, and I feel like it is something that has never
really been touched on and should have been. I think
it's really intense, but I guess that it might be a subject char people don't really want to touch, because it
Yes, I was shocked! I was shocked. It was so bad. And
isn't it unconstitutional, what they're doing? I don't
understand how that was allowed. It's crazy. Yeah, it's
really bad.
Doyouhaveanyfinalwordsfor all the L Wordfans
outthere?
I just want co thank all of the fans for their support
and for allowing the show to go for as long as it did.
We really appreciate them. Speaking (for] myself and
all of the cast, we really, really appreciate them. ■
March 2009 \ 45
Outlaw dvke 6tvlefrom nvc.
Photos by Leshe
• Van Stelten
Channel your inner
(above) in Ri
d' rock goddess
tee ($25) anJ~1:e s ~ed concert muscle
tuxedo shirt w·th ve ess customized
1 swallows ($G5).
Edgy,
urban. a n d C h"IC (left) with th.
"Q
ueer N Dirty" win d
is
($45), recycled
ge h?odie jacket
shirt with Lady k~1tle plaid vintage
($35).
I er mermaid logo
Knock 'em dead
ex (opposite a ~~spe~i~!ly your
camo tee ($2~).g ) m this Lady Killer"
All clothing b
OUTFITTER~. ove from RIGGED/
March 2009
I47
With every car buyer concerned about fuel economy and the impact her automotive choice
will have on che environment, thank goodness it is becoming easier to make the transition
to a greener car. If you want to determine precisely how green your new car choice is, the
Environmental Protection Agency offers both the Smart Way program and the online Green
Vehicle Guide. The Green Vehicle Guide allows you to comparison shop by vehicle name and
type and will calculate the greenest vehicle among those you choose. While in 2008, only 26
percent of the cars tested received the Smart Way designation, that percentage is rising quickly,
thanks to some exciting new 2009 models. Below, in no particular order, are eight of our top
picks for cars that will provide you with a fun, green and economical driving experience.
Volkswagen
JettaTOICleanDiesel
BMW335d
With a 3.0 liter, in-line, six-diesel engine that
BMW claims will consume 25 percent less
fuel than equally powerful engines, che 335d
gees 23 mpg in che city and 36 mpg on the
highway. It is the environmentally cleanest
car BMW has ever produced and can certainly challenge the hybrids. Capable of going
from zero to 60 in just 6.2 seconds, the 3 35d
is truly a driver's car. Prices start at $43,900.
SmartFortwo
If you don't need a lot of interior space
and want a spiffy car that you can
park practically anywhere, you'll find
this little bargain adorable. Popular in
Europe for years, the Smart Fortwo
gets between 33 and 41 mpg. The
Smart Fortwo two-seater now comes
with optional head-thorax side airbags and has a five-speed automated
manual transmission with a manual
or automatic mode. The base price
starts at a user-friendly $12,000 for
the Smart Fortwo pure and $17,000
for the Smart Fortwo cabriolet.
48
Icurve
Like the BMW 335d, the Volkswagen Jetta
TDI is a clean diesel car and was the first diesel-powered new car to be certified for sale
across the United States. Its fuel economy,
according to Volkswagen, will be 30 percent
better than the gasoline-powered Jetta, even
though the engines are the same size. The
Jetta TDI is expected to exceed 40 mpg in
the city and 50 mpg on the highway. The
2009 Volkswagen Jetta TDI comes in two
models, a sedan ($21,990) and a sportwagen
($23,590).
FordFusionHybrid
An eco-friendly Fusion Hybrid is Ford'
first attempt at a hybrid sedan and the car
has been nominated (along with the BMW
335d, Smart Fortwo, Volkswagen Jetta
TDI and Saturn Vue 2 Mode Hybrid) as
one of the greenest cars of 2009. Ford says
the Fusion and Milan hybrids will be able
to cruise at speeds up to 47 mph on electric power alone. The Fusion Hybrid will be
among the first Ford hybrids to use an electric air-conditioning compressor to save engine load. With no number yet available for
highway mileage, the Ford Fusion Hybrid
is rated at 38 mpg in the city. The price is
expected to be about $5,000 more than a
comparable Ford Fusion.
ToyotaPrius
Last year, the Toyota Prius
was the most fuel-efficient vehicle sold in the United States.
A mid-size car, the Prius has
become a hit with consumers because of its 45 mpg city
and 48 mpg highway rating,
its great acceleration and its
handling ease. With three
models available, prices start
at $22,000. As with most hybrid cars, it can
take up to 15,000 miles of
driving before you achieve
the peak mpg. Changes in
design and performance
are planned for the 2010
model year.
HondaCivicHybrid
With a base price of
$24,000 and a fuel-efficiency rating of 40 mpg in
the city and 45 mpg on the
highway, the Honda Civic
Hybrid was designed to
prove that environmental-
ism and style can work together. Last year, US
News and World Report ranked the Honda
Civic Hybrid third out of 34 affordable small
cars. Unlike the Toyota Prius, the Honda
Civic Hybrid doesn't run in pure electric
mode, but it is a fun, frisky car to drive.
MiniCooperandClubman
A surprisingly successful reincarnation of the
old British Mini, the Mini Cooper and its big
brother, the Mini Clubman, are sporty green
vehiclesthat are a lot of fun to drive.This year,
Mini introduced the new high-performance
John Cooper Works edition, powered by
208 horses. All Coopers come in base and S
models-the S hatchbacks and the Clubman
are turbocharged, and the S convertible is
supercharged, producing 168 horsepower.
Averaging 28 mpg in the city and 37 mpg on
the highway,the Mini Cooper is considered a
mini compact car-bigger than a two-seater
and smaller than a subcompact. Prices for the
2009 Minis start at $19,000 but rise steeply
as the you deck the car out.
SaturnVueGreenUne2 ModeHybrid
The only crossover on this list, GM's Saturn
Vue Green Line 2 Mode Hybrid is the first
front-wheel-drive car to use GM's 2 Mode
Hybrid technology. GM says the Vue 2
Mode's fuel economy will be 50 percent better than that of the gas-only V-6, which it
rates at 16 mpg in the city and 22 mpg on
the highway. The Saturn Vue Green Line
2 Mode Hybrid is expected to have a range
of over 500 miles. With production beginning in late 2008, prices were not available
at press time. ■
March 2009
I 49
NEm BROWN
and Star Johnson are like most young
c uP,les. 111ey go to college, take walks along the
water, read, write poetry. And, most importantly,
they're finally both 21, which means they can go out
and party sometimes, too.
Unlike most twentysomething couples, Brown and
Johnson are homeless, splitting nights between the
grimy plastic seats of the New York City subway and
friends' couches. That was until they found shelter ar
Sylvia'sPlace, just one of three LGBT-specific youth
shelters that nave opened in the city since 2002 to deal
with he overflow of homeless queer youth.
At Sylvia's Place, Brown and Johnson, along with
26 other young people in this 20-bed facility,sleep on
the floor, share only one shower and fight off mice.
B\lt at least, they, y, fro 6 p.m. until 8 a.m., they
have a afe place to call home-even •f that pl cc •s an
industrial loft with no real beds.
"It's just good to be off the street and out
cold;' says Brown. "We sleep on the floor. and
people ask us how we can do that everynight.
good, for the moment, just to have a placeto
and change:'
Brown and Johnson are but a small part
York'shom,elessyoum, one-third of whom ide
LGBT, according to a 2007 estimate by the
Gayand Lesbian 'task Force. The City of Ne
also recently confirmed th~ figure in a stud
ration. Almost everyone at Sylvia's Place can share
at least one traumatic story from their journey to
achieve freedom for their sexual identity.
"We're all here because were either runawa or
throwaways;•says Ojai Xi, a 19-year-old transg nder
teen from Queens. Xi left home at an early ag and
traveled through Kentucky, Washington state and
Pennsylvania in search of somewhere secure before
landing back in ew York at Sylvia's Place five years
later. She's come to regard the shelter as her makeshift
home.
Johnson and Brown, like Xi, are both runaways. "I
had a huge fight with my brothers about being a lesbian and my mom told me to get out;' says Brown.''So
I did. They couldn't accept who I was, so I couldn't
ray there:•
her rooltlyn horn shortly after com-
.~~!:~~~}.\
told me if she ever found out I was a lesbian,
C)ll~ she"She
would kick me out;' says Johnson. She couldn't
bring Brown home, so instead she spent the nights
c:c>"~"~ll,ITY
with her-sleeping in subway cars and using friends'
IS 1~c:1~1s1s--apartments to shower and change. The couple repeated the same cycle every day for months while man11-113~1:•s
11
aging to keep their part-time jobs as a nanny and a
,fl:l~Y secretary
and still attend college classes.
"From
one I got evicted, she's been with meLl,~ITl:ll that's a longdaytime;'
says Brown.
A"~C)lA~TSShelters like Sylvia's Place on West 36th Street
attempt to provide relief, as well as case manage<>1=
31:llS1=<>1:J
ment and medical care. But with fewer than 50 beds
citywide, LGBT shelters are calling the problem of
Lc;3yYC)lJTl-1
1
disenfranchised queer youth an epidemic. There are
1
Tl-113~1:
S transitional
living programs that help LGBT youth
off the streets, but it can take months to find
,fl3~Y LITTLI: get
housing through these, and there are few options in
S13~,tK:l:Sthe meantime-other city-sponsored youth shelters
Tl-IA
T Al~I:
SA1=1:.
are unwelcoming.
11
"You can't set up a system for runaway and
homeless youth without acknowledging the huge
percentage that fall into the category of LGBT;'
says New York City Councilman Lewis Fidler
(D-Brooklyn), who has continually pushed for more
youth shelter funding. "Our numbers clearly show
that it's 30 to 40 percent:'
When Fidler first set out to expand the city's youth
shelter program six years ago, Covenant House, a
shelter run by the Catholic Church, was one of the
only publicly funded youth shelter programs. "We
were very, very troubled by the low percentage that
Covenant House identified as LGBT youth-about
3 percent;' says Fidler, who also says that at the time,
the shelter actually had empty beds, in spite of a massive homeless youth population.
54
Icurve
Since 2006 the Department of Youth and
Community Development, which operates Runaway
and Homeless Youth Services, has certified two new
programs specifically contracted to provide services for
queer youth. Advocates, however, charge that requirements for certification from DYCD, such as gender
segregation, are not possible in queer youth shelters.
They also claim that Covenant House, the city's largest youth shelter, is not safe for queer youth. In "mainstream" shelters, they say, LGBT youth struggle with
harassment, discrimination and other offenses.
Tiffany Parker, a 23-year-old transgender girl from
Alabama, was first placed in a men's shelter when she
came to New York. There, she says, she was bullied
into performing sexual acts on other men, and then
moved to the women's shelter, where some women
were alarmed by her masculine appearance. Finally,
she ended up at Sylvia's Place, but says she still
struggles with things like finding a job because of
her gender identity.
''A lot of queer youth are not safe going to
Covenant House;' says Patrick Markee, a senior
policy analyst for the Coalition for the Homeless.
"They've experienced firsthand violence or discrimination, which is why we've seen a lot of smaller
LGBT shelters opening up. Markee says that while
funding has increased in the last two years for queer
shelters, funding for shelters like Sylvia's Place is still
not adequate, leaving most of the youth to sleep on
the floor in sleeping bags.
"Sylvia's Place is great, to a certain extent;' says
Johnson. "But it lacks a lot because it really doesn't get
much funding:' While Sylvia's Place offers case working, shelter, food, drop-in services and group 1 •
allet, creative writing and trans empowermt'. r
ttll
lacks many resources. Like, for example, enougl k1--p•
LC;3TI-IC)l,'11:Ll:SS
YC)lJTl-1
Homelessness
amongst
LGBT
youthis notanissuelimitedto justonecity,or evena
fewcities-it's nationwide.
"Lesbian,
gay,bisexual
andtransgender
youthcontinue
to makeupa disproportionate
numberof runaway
andhomeless
youth-as manyas
40 percent,"
saysReaCarey,
executive
directorof theNational
GayandLesbian
Task
Force,
whosestudyonhomeless
queeryouthfirst broughtnationalattention
to thesubject."It is a nationaldisgrace
thatyouthcontinue
to beturnedoutof theirhomesand
communities
basedontheiractualor perceived
sexualorientation
or genderidentity,"
saysCarey.
Here'sa lookat thehomeless
LGBT
youthsituationin citiesnationwide.
:IOSTON
> Morethan750youthsbetween
the
agesof 18and25wereusingtheemergencysheltersystemin 2002,thelast
yearthatdatawaspubliclyavailable.
> Anestimated
150to 300youths
involved
withtheBostonsheltersystem
identifyasLGBT.
ing bags to go around, or even the money to move to
a space that meets New York State Office of Children
and Family Services regulations, in order to get more
funding.
With only 20 beds, Sylvia'sPlace is the largest single
queer youth shelter in the city. Still, employees often
find themselves having to turn kids away.
"Were so full right now;' says Kate Barnhart, dropin coordinator at Sylvia's Place. "We have 27 kids in a
facility meant for 20. And there are thousands of kids
out there:•
"Our community is in crisis-there's very limited
amounts of beds for LGBT youth, there's very little
services that are safe;' says Glo Ross, lead organizer
at the youth-orcolor queer activist group FIERCE.
Ross heads a campaign to develop a 24- 7 youth center
on the decaying Pier 40-another attempt to give queer
youth a place to go.
For now, Johnson and Brown are glad to have a
home at Sylvia's Place, but they're working hard to
get out of the shelter system and into an apartment
of their own. They're attending classes at the College
of New Rochelle in Brooklyn and doing odd jobs to
make money when they have time away from their
studies. Brown hopes to become a forensic scientist
and Johnson wants to be a nurse.
"The situation is stressful at times, so
we argue a bit much;' says Johnson. "But
we try to stay positive. Loving each other
is what gets us through this, at the end of
the day:'
"When we first met, there were fireworks;• adds Johnson, shyly clutching
Brown's hand in front of the shelter on a
chilly weekday night. "She's everything to
me-she's the light I always needed:' ■
> Thecityhassupported
trainingto
address
theneedsof homeless
LGBT
youthat shelters
throughout
thecity,
and2,000Department
of SocialServices
DENVER
staffmembers
statewide
underwent
> In 2004,therewere
LGBT
awareness
training.
853 homelessyouths
>Additionally,
WalthamHouse,a private
betweenthe agesof
organization
in Waltham,
Mass.,provides 15 and25 in metroservicesandshelterspecifically
for
politanDenver.
LGBTyouth.
> Between
170and
340
homeless
youths
CHCAGO
identifyasLGBT.
> Chicago
hasbetween12,000and
15,000homeless
youth,according
to the > Themayorof Denver
NightMinistry,anorganization
serving
hasimplemented
a
homeless
andrunaway
youth.
10-yearplancalled"Denver's
Road
Home"
aimed
at
ending
homelessness.
> Between
1,500and3,000homeless
Theprogram
is committed
to ending
Chicago
youthsidentifyasLGBT.
homelessness
for everydemographic,
but
> Fewerthan200bedsareavailable
city- thereis nospecificfocusonLGBT
youth.
widefor homeless
youth,andnoneare
designated
specifically
for LGBT
youth.
LOSANGEI..ES
> Additionally,
theChicago
Coalition
for
> Thereareestimated
to be morethan
theHomeless
estimates
thatin theyear
4,000homeless
youthsages13to 21
2000,42 percentof youthsseekingstate- in the LosAngeles
metropolitan
area,
fundedshelterfor homeless
youthwere
basedonthe2005LosAngeles
Homeless
turnedaway.
Services
Authority
census.
> Between
830and1,660homeless
youthsidentifyasLGBT.
> Presently,
therearenocity-,countyor state-funded
programs
aimedat
homeless
LGBT
youth;however,
theLA
Gay& LesbianCenter's
Kruks-Tilsner
Transitional
LivingProgram
provides
transitional
housing,
andGay& Lesbian
Adolescent
SocialServices
(GLASS)
provides
healthandsocialservices
to LGBT
youth.
March 2009
I 55
REVIEWS
I Music
SouthernBelles
Twangy tunes to get you singing along. By Margaret Coble
Sel Ti led Pr •a J (Geffen
Records):
PrimaJ area pair
of Mexican
Americancousins
(18-year-old
Janelleand
19-year-old
JessicaMartinez)
whocroonandharmonize
theirwaythroughtheirdebut
album.Their13tracksdeal
with loveandits infinite
confusion,
in bothEnglish
andSpanish,
unitingboth
languages
withcatchyhooks
andbeats.Thetwosomehas
a soundthat'sreminiscent
of
mid'90sfemale-heavy
R&B
likeAaliyahandTLC,and
somesillysongtitlesandthe
lyricsto match("Homework"
and"Leftovers"
aretwothat
springto mind),butthealbum
is perfectfor gettingpumped
to gooutandparty,or to play
in the carafterthe 5 o'clock
whistleon Friday.Thetraviesa
track"Chilosa"is a surefire
clubhit,and"Girlfriend"is the
idealsoundtrack
for recoveringfrombeingspurned:"All
youhadto dowaslet me
knowfromthe beginning
thatyouhada girl."Singit,
sisters-er, cousins.
[Ainsley
Drew]
56 j curve
There's nothing like a little twang once and a while,
and singer-songwriters Lucinda Williams, Carrie
Elkin and Lee Ann Womack have got the goods,
whether it's Williams' bluesy Americana, Elkin's
rootsy eclecticism or Womack's more traditional
country sound.
Of course, it wouldn't be a Lucinda Williams record
if there weren't a few downers, so the poignant "If
Wishes Were Horses" fills in and "Knowing" and
"Rarity" offer more brooding sounds for those who
miss the good ol' depressing Williams of yore. On
the whole, it's an outstanding set for the 56-year-old
Louisiana native, who thankfully seems to be finding
LittleHoney,Luc"ndaWilliam (LostHighway): a little bit of bliss after all these years.
I've always been a fan of Lucinda Williams' moody,
introspective songwriting, husky voice and TexasThe Jeopardyof Circumstance,Carrie Elkin
Louisiana infused folk-alt-country sound, but I need
(self released)· Emerging
singer-songwriter
to mention how glad I am to hear her sounding-dare
Carrie Elkin has a few things in common with
I say it?-happy on this latest album. It's a refreshWilliams-time
spent in Texas (she's currently
ing change of pace, indeed. From the opening "Real
based in Austin), for starters, and a love of the
Love;' a downright gleeful blues-rock proclamation
Americana-roots musical spectrum. But in general,
of finding just that, to the hard-charging lovefest
her sound is more reminiscent of harder-to-categorize
"Honey Bee;' and the old-school country-blues of
eccentrics like Patti Griffin, Iris DeMent and even
"Well Well Well;' Williams' lyrics and music have a
Devon Sproule. This album is a lighter, brighter,
lighter air to them than we're accustomed to hearing
quirkier country-folk hybrid that exudes her eclecfrom her. Even the mellower numbers like the blues
tic gypsy spirit through sweet melodies and warm
smoker "Tears of Joy" and the dirgelike "Little Rock
lyrics. From the sparse, spiritually pondering opener,
Star" -a hopeful ode to self-destructive rock stars
"Obadiah," to the more upbeat "Roots & Wings;'
everywhere-seem to portray this new perspective.
about the age-old conflict between settling down
and wanderlust, to the guilt,
ridden acoustic singalong
"Did She Do Her Best" and
the perky, harmonica,filled
acoustic,pop love song"Broke
TV,"Elkin displays a wide mu,
sical range. The blues,rockin'
"Ode to Ogallala;' about get,
ting stranded in Ogallala,
Neb., after her Volkswagen
bus broke down, is probably
the best ensemble piece on
the record, showcasing her
stellar band, while "Shell of a
Man'' is my personal favorite,
a bluegrass banjo,fest with gospel flavoring,
written from the perspective of a man who,
during a palm reading, learns that he has a
short lifeline.
Womack returns to her
"neo,traditionalist" roots,
thanks in part to legendary
George Strait producer
Tony Brown. Though
there's still a tad too much
production on this 12,
cut disc-a
problem I
often have with Nashville
country
records- I'm
surprised at how much I
like this album. Womack
co,wrote the four cuts that
set the lyrical pace for the
rest of the album. These
songs' homage to vintage country, and the
already successful first single "Last Call" and
the flipside "Solitary Thinkin"' only cement
that association, with their drinking,alone,
in,a,bar themes. A few cuts do venture out
Call Me Crazy,Lee Ann Womack(MCA of sad,song territory, like the uplifting "I
Nashville):Veteran country music star Lee Found It in You" and the soaring "The Story
Ann Womack grew up in Texas, though now
of My Life;' but even these maintain the hall,
she's part of the Nashville country music
marks of classic country: slide guitars, violins
elite, with two Grammies and countless
and sweeping string arrangements. For those
other awards under her belt. Despite some
who enjoy a good old,fashioned Nashville,
of her mid,career forays into poppier "new drenched country record, give Womack and
country" fare, on this seventh studio effort
her crystalline voice a listen. ■
Q+A
Ronnda Cadle
Ronnda Cadle has been
playing the guitar for
over 20 years, but her big
break came in 2006, when
she opened for Sarah
Bettens and wowed the
crowd with her unique
instrumental sound. Her
most recent album, After,
was a group effort with
the String Poets.
Whendidyoufirst knowyouwanted
to be a music:an?
I was 16 and played in a heavy metal
band at the time, believe it or not. I was
a rock 'n' roller then-loved Paul Gibson
and Marshall Stack, '80s hair. I so
wanted to be Nancy Wilson from Heart
in the '80s, but she's actually the reason I
started playing acoustic anyway.
How did you an the S ring Poets
cometogether?
I was trying to find a lyrical writing part,
ner, because I don't sing. Finally, I just
stuck to my instrumental stuff and as
soon as I decided to do that, and was re,
ally getting out and doing my solo stuff,
these girls just dropped into my life, one
at a time. It was amazing.
Whatare someof yourmfluences?
AftertheCarnival
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(Secretly
Canadian)
, TheDreamgirls
superThisconceptdisc
upontheir : starfinallyreleases
her
accompanies
Dalton's Following
2005international : much-anticipated
debut
first e-bookrelease,
I am a Bird : CD,showcasing
hervoDaughters
of theDead success,
Sea,bothof whichare Now,thisfive-songEP : calandmusicalrange
the
: andfeaturingcontribubasedontheelement foreshadows
releaseof theirnew
: tionsfromTimbaland,
of water.Fansof
Ludacris,
singer-songwriters
Tori disc,TheCryingLight. Ne-Yo,
RobinThickeand
Mostnotableis the
Amos,Rachael
Sage
among
andMagdalen
Hsu-Li titletrack,a hypnotic, DianeWarren,
goosebump-inspiring, others.Standouts
will rejoicein this
ballad : include"Spotlight,"
melodic,piano-based eco-conscious
and,of
describing
a placethat , "Pocketbook"
drama-pop
opusfrom
theshowstopthe Minneapolis-based is rapidlydisappear- : course,
ing-Earth-and how per"AndI AmTelling
indieartist.
muchit will be missed.: YouI'm NotGoing."
Rusalka's
Umbrella
JennyDalton
(Glossy
Shoebox)
I look to travel for my influences.
When I go out on tour, which I am
about to do on the West Coast for four
months, it's the scenery that inspires
me. I get all relaxed and that's where it
really comes from.
Whatkmdof relationship
do you
havewith the lesbiancom uni ?
I'm membership director for Fourth
Tuesday Atlanta, one of the largest and
oldest lesbian groups in Atlanta. Also,
Joyce Tree and her partner, Dot, started
Swiftwaters Campground over 30 years
ago. My CD is dedicated to Joyce, who
passed away Dec. 31, 2006. I hold an
annual music festival at Swiftwaters. The
goal is to generate people to come out
and save the campground because it's
a legacy... ! want to keep Joyce and her
partner's memory alive. [KellyRulon]
~
March 2009
I 57
REVIEWSBooks
Betweenthe Lines
This month, it's dykes in cartoons and in the kitchen. By Rachel Pepper
The EssentialDykesto WatchOut For,Alison
Bechdel (HoughtonMifflin): For years, Alison
Bechdel has been a treasure dear to the hearts of
many in the dyke community. As the creator of the
long-running comic strip Dykes to Watch Out For,
Bechdel introduced us to Mo, Lois, Toni, Clarice,
Ginger, Sparrow and the rest of the gang. After the
recent mainstream success of Fun Home, Bechdel's
LifeIS a VerbPattiD"gh
moving autobiographical graphic novel, this compila(Skirt!):UsuallyI'd be
frightenedoff bya book tion of strips is likely to find a home on the shelves of
subtitled37 Daysto Wake lesbian fans old and new.
This collection, although not absolutely comUp,BeMindfulandLive
Intentionally.
ButPattiDigh, plete, is a bounty of 390 strips, starting in 1983, and
whosestepfatherdied37
going right up to the recently drawn end pages. How
daysaftershewasdiagnosed odd, but strangely satisfying, to see Mo and Lois in
with breastcancer,offersa
their earliest configuration, still raw and full of promdelightfulprintversionof her
award-winning
blog,37 Days. ise, and realize that there are almost 400 more pages
Yes,at its coreit boilsdown to enjoy. If you've ever missed a strip,
or indeed, whole story lines (how'd
to tropesthat havebeencooptedbythe self-helpindustry Raffi become-gasp-a
teenager?), or
(likelovingmore,trusting if you've somehow missed this entire
yourself,slowingdown)but
phenomenon, sit down with this book
there'sjust enoughwit and
and don't get up again for several hours.
wisdomandpracticaltipsto
Not only is Bechdel's wit as sharp as her
makeit enjoyable,
evenfor a
non-believer.
Dighcansegue nib, the strip just keeps getting better over
the years. As the lesbian community has
fromthe complexity
of theflea
grown, so too have the strip's characters and the story.
to a planecrashwithoutmissinga beat,wovenin with edgy Whether she's covering lesbian motherhood, political
graphicsandquotesfromthe
rallies and presidential politics, women's bookstores
likesof MarleneDietrichand
and music festivals, communal housing, bisexuality,
ToniMorrison,makingfor a
academia, multiple sclerosis, non-monogamy or even
masterfully
differentmanual
for living.[DianeAnderson- transgenderism, Bechdel has always been an astute
Minshall] and articulate inside observer of dyke culture and her
characters have always been multiracial, of different
ages, classes, sizes and abilities, even
when we in the movement couldn't
get it right in real life.
the
ple, and they're hardly gourmet or healthconscious in scope. But how can you resist
Beleaguered Butch's Meatloaf, or one for
packaged macaroni and cheese that involves
boiling the noodles, stirring in the packaged sauce with an "EBU" (essential butch utensil)
then serving it with a bagged salad-with a reminder
to readers to open the bag first! Because this is a collection, "butch bios" accompany the recipes, which are
broken down into amusing chapter categories like
"The Morning After" for breakfast, "Rabbit Food" for
salads and "Hot 'n Heavy" for meat and fish. Though
this may not be the book you reach for when you want
to host a dinner party, it's a cute present for the butch
in your life who makes the occasional mayo sandwich.
After she masters that, maybe she'll graduate to clams
with white sauce and spaghetti or even the French
TheButchCookBook,Eds.Lee onion dinner extraordinaire. There's no reason, sugLynch,
NelWardandSueHardesty gest the editors, why even the most cooking-impaired
(Teal RibbonPublications):
Do
butch couldn't offer up the "Impress Your Date with
butches cook? Yes, is the quick anWhat's Left Over in Your Fridge" omelet at least once
swer from The Butch Cook Book, or twice. After all, writes co-editor Lee Lynch in the
which does actually contain usable book's foreword, The Butch Cook Book is not meant to
recipes, such as French country pork
mock butches, but to honor them, and to "offer proof
chops and spicy lentil soup. But this
of our commonality and of our womanhood: our
compilation never takes itself too se- recipes:' Another serving of Sicilian spaghetti puttanriously. Most of the recipes are simesca, anyone? ■
butch
cook
book
58
Icurve
Q+A
Illustrator Liz Baillie
Liz Baillie is a native New Yorker and
queer-identified indie cartoonist and illustrator. Her work has appeared in numerous zines and anthologies, including Other
magazine and Mauled! In My Brain Hurts,
a brilliantly designed collection of stories,
she acutely portrays New York City teens
in search of identity, meaning and acceptance. She mines rich complexities with
empathetic wit and a sense of wonder.
Yourecentlyfinishedvolumeoneof My
BrainHurts.Howdoesit feel?
It's a mixture of elation and sadness. Kind
of like a breakup you knew was inevitable
and you still love the person, but you just
can't live with them anymore. I'm happy to
end it, in a way, because it was my first long
project, and now I know I'm capable of
starting and finishing such a thing, which
is a great feeling. I'm a little sad though
because I've been with these characters
about eight years now, and, cheesy as it
sounds, they've become a part of me.
Howmuchof yourwork is autobiographical?Arethereanycharactersor
sto ies with hichyoumost"denffy?
People frequently ask me if MBH is autobiographical and usually I will emphatically state that it is not, because it is not
literally autobiography. I'd say a good 90
to 95 percent of the stuff in MBH never
happened to me. However, the character of Kate is based upon myself at her
age-16-in
terms of the way she acts, the
way she looks, the way she interacts with
people. I was never quite as bold as her
though!
You ocusa lot on qu r outh
h
?
I was a queer youth, so I remembered how
it felt going through adolescence, never
being sure of who I was, never feeling like
there was a label that quite fit me ... and
how I was always searching for someone
like me in movies, TV, books. I created
MBH, in part, to provide something that
[the) 16-year-old me would have related
to. There are examples of queerness in
media and there are punk kids in media,
but there were no stories about queer punk
kids-or at least not that many-so I
made one.
Your o clearlyshowsan interestin
genderand sexualitytheoryand LGBT
history.WhatLGBThistoricalfigures
wouldy Ii e to ortray?
I might like to do something about Leslie
Feinberg again. Anyone who bucks traditional ideas of gender is of interest to me,
really .... Gender and sexuality [are] two
things I never get tired of exploring.
[MaryFoulk]
Dressing Up
HowtoBeUseful
MeganHustad
(Houghton
Mifflin
Company)
A wittyguideon howto
begoodat life.Writing
frompersonal
experience,MeganHustad
showsuswherenotto
gowrongandcollects
thebestadvicefrom
someof the most
successful
peoplein
history,like Andrew
Carnegie
andHelen
GurleyBrown.
[Kamala
Puligandla)
Queersexlife
MakingTrouble
'AboutFace
TerryGoldie
LynneSegal
! Eds.AnneBurtand
(Arsenal
PulpPress)
Tail)
: ChristinaBakerKline (Serpent's
: (SealPress)
' It's nota newwordto
Partmemoir,
part
I Thisanthology
delivers politicalhistory,Making' usein yourqueerstudTrouble,
byAustralian iesclass-Queersexlife
'. essaysfroma variety
a new
, activistLynneSegal, . addresses
' of femaleauthors
wayto makesense
spansdecades
and
I (including
Jennifer
continents
to tellthe , of theoriesof sexual
: Baumgardner,
theaureal
story
of
a woman , desire:throughone's
: thorof LookBothWays:
This
• Bisexual
Politics)
about · wholivedthroughthe ownexperiences.
birthof feminismand seriesof cleverlytitled
: whattheyseewhen
: theylookin themirror. whereallthoseactiv- ' essaysis a compelling
collection,
chronicling
: Oftenfunny,frequently istshaveendedup.
1
journey
for TerryGoldie's
: reflectiveandalways : Thisis a must-read
himfeministsnewandold. , to understanding
relatable.
self.[ArisaWhite]
[Rachel
Lastra]
: [Kelsey
Truman]
Often, children play dress-up to express
their identity. In 10,000 Dresses by
Marcus Ewert (Seven Stories Press),
young Bailey dreams of frocks made of
lilies and roses but everyone refuses to
look at the vivid
designs, telling
Bailey boys don't
wear dresses.
Laurel, an older
girl, recognizes
Bailey's genius.
Acclaimed fashion
designer Isaac
Mizrahi says, "I love this book! If I had
this book growing up, I might have felt
better about my dress-wearing habit."
Bailey's story and Rex Ray's imaginative
illustrations will make this this groundbreaking children's book a big hit at
home. It's an uplifting trans-positive
book about friendship, dreams and
wonder. [TaniaHammidi]
March 2009
I 59
REVIEWSSapphic Screen
Metaphorically
Speaking
1V's gone meta with queer topics. By Candace Moore
TheSense,(Heitmann
Entertainment}:
Inthis day
andage,documentaries
are
a dimea dozen.Betweenthe
popularityof realityTVand
YouTube'sgardenof endless
voyeuristic
delights,what's
realis what'sreallyhot.But
sometimes
a goodold-fashionedstorytellsa talethat's
far morepowerful.Thisis the
casewith TheSensei,a film
writtenanddirectedbyand
starringDianaLeelnosanto
(above),
a martialartsexpert
andformerstuntdoublefor
SarahMichelleGelleron Buffy
theVampire
Slayer.Thistale
of self-acceptance
andselfdefenseset in the '80shits
all the predictable
notes,but
the historicaldetailandthe
poignancy
of the vignettesare
astounding.
It's easyto forget
the panicandbigotrythat
wereprevalentin the early
yearsof theAIDSepidemic,
and,for thosewhodidn't
experience
it, andtherefore
do notknowtherewasa time
whenall homosexuals
were
considered
to bediseased,
this movieis likea kickto the
gut.[Ainsley
Drew]
60
I curve
Alan Ball respins the queer-as-monster allegory
to argue for both "vampire" and gay rights, Old
Christine takes the plunge with another woman to
sing the praises of homo-social love and The L Word
gazes into its own navel once again.
TrueBlood(HBO):Six Feet Under's mastermind
producer Alan Ball brings us a new romantic horror
serial that is distinctly imagined and convincingly
acted, despite the fact that its story line is a bit of
a Buffy rip-off. There's only one gay character, but
fears of vampires work as a not-so-subtle metaphor
for discrimination against other groups. Ir's been
two years since the invention of synthetic blood
allowed vampires to integrate with humans rather
than snacking on them. Vamps have since "come out
of the coffins;' but not everyone's convinced. The
opening credits invoke a climate of racism and homophobia using documentary-style footage, such as
a sign that reads "God Hates Fangs:' Members of
the American Vampire League and religious leaders argue on the news. Vampires are ghettoized and
have their own clubs where specialty sex workers
"service" masochistic humans with vamp fetishes.
The show revolves around Sookie (Anna Paquin), a
telepath who wants nothing more than for her small
Louisiana town to shut up. When a polite Civil War
veteran re-vamps and takes up residence in his abandoned family home, Sookie finds herself drawn to
his non-sanguine looks and gentle thoughts. With
the string of murders of women who associate with
vampires mounting, the townspeople don't exactly
take kindly to Sookie's new suitor. Her own brother
spouts hateful epithets. But since the murdered
women are strangled, not drained, the killings look
more like hate crimes than the work of vampires.
The New Adventuresof Old Christine(CBS):
This season's premiere of Julia Louis-Dreyfus'
post-Seinfeld star vehicle featured a surprise wedding between JLD's Christine, a neurotic divorcee,
and her blunt business partner Barb (played by the
hilarious lesbian comic Wanda Sykes). Christine's
proposal to her best friend-intended
to help her
from being deported-seemed
like a harmless
reference to California's legalization of gay marriage. However, Christine and Barb did really tie
the knot. While theirs is not a sexual relationship,
the liberal-hearted but often politically incorrect
show ultimately uses the idea of gay marriage to
w
~
!E
(.)
g
i
~
::J
tt
::J
u
Q+A
Traci Dinwiddie
argue for the legalization of other alternative kinship formations. What's striking is
that rather than being played like a Chuck
and Larry-style joke, the episode veered
more toward the sentimental, highlighting
the ways in which the two women already
served as each other's family. Christine
effuses, "Our marriage would be fun-we'd
hang out, we'd eat, we'd pee in front of each
other ... You are really the most wonderful
person I know ... If you leave the country,
who am I going to raise Richie with?" Since
the premiere, the gals faced life-changing
antigay discrimination and their new union
comes up in nearly every episode and is rife
with possibilities. Perhaps Christine will
have some more new adventures?
TheL Word:SeasonFive(Showtime):
The
L Word has always been particularly good at
making fun of overused lesbian tropes. Now
on DVD, season five kicks off with down-onher-luck heiress Helena trapped in a campy
rendition of Caged.The producers of The L
Wordalso recycle more material for die-hard
fans to enjoy through Jenny's film adaptation
of Les Girls,her novel based on the events
of the serial's premiere season. But this reflexivity doesn't take itself too seriously;
we're meant to take pleasure in an alternate
universe (portrayed as more "commercial")
where Nina (i.e., Tina) acts overly predatory
with Jesse (i.e.,Jenny), when we know damn
well Tina only has eyes for Bette. When Jenny
loses her director's reins on the film due to a
double-crossing personal assistant, Les Girls
takes an unfortunately straight turn. The L
Word seems to be making a claim for its own
"authenticity;' relevance and good taste, compared to an imagined sister script run amok.
Season five also sees Bette and Tina rekindle,
thus reviving those rampantly hot sex scenes.
Again, this choice plays to what the message
board scribblers have been begging for. It's
admirable how much The L Word openly
fondles itself and foregrounds its
malleability as fiction-it's so 6-:'-'!111!'1!1
bad, it's good. Someone definitely studied postmodernism
in college. ■
Mega-talented and easy on the eyes,Traci
Dinwiddie spans a wealth of lesbian fantasies as she shares the screen with Demi
Moore in Mr. Brooksand takes on the role
of the lesbian poet Renee Vivien in Jane
Clark's The Touch.We caught the starlet
after the inaugural Mixed Roots Film and
Literary Festival in Los Angeles.
"d
au • ·on o
Renee
Not quite. I felt strongly attracted and
connected to the role of Kerime.
(',
~
WheretheWater
MeetstheSky
(Camfed)
: TheAmazingTruth
: AboutQueenRaqula
(Poppoli
Pictures)
WhoDoesSheThink here!With
JoshandSara
Shel?
(MysticArtistsFilms) ' (here!TV)
w
I
I showed up dressed in my beautiful
Turkish threads and a sharpened Turkish
accent. The director took a good look at
me and said, "Honey, you're white!" I told
her I was of Syrian and Cherokee Indian
decent. I thought I had an ethnic lookyou know, bushy black eyebrows. [Laughs]
Jane said, "Let me see you for Renee."So I
came back the next day to audition for the
role of Renee Vivien in an old tuxedo and
Cl)
Twenty-three
women Thisdocumentary
tells
' thestoryof Raquela,
froma villagein
w
I
Zambiaaregivena
a Filipinotrans
w chance
,
womanwhodreams
to
speak
their
0
Cl
minds.
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tackle
'
of marryinga man
0
I
~ topicsranging
. andlivingin theWest.
from
0
i5 orphaned
childrento : Transgender
peoplein
1-often
femaleprostitution
to , the Philippines
~ HIVwhileemphasiz- ' endup livingonthe
w
...J
of : fringesof society,
ti ingtheimportance
tu self-expression,
com- stuckin low-paying
g munityleadershipand jobsor prostitution.But
gumption
education.
It's a strong : Raquela's
0
z
0
is captivating
andwill
storyof hopeand
CD
w
self-empowerment. , keepyouwatchingtill
Cl
>I
the end.[ArisaWhite]
[Fernanda
Silva]
~
z
:i:
1--
Cl)
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:::)
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:::)
~
JoshandSaraarehere
A sentiment
I'msure
: someof usarefamiliar ' onhere!Thisis a radio
with.Thisdocumentarytalkshowbroughtto
: fromdirectorPamela , thesmallscreen.It's
: TannerBollshowsthe nota newconcept,but
experience
of several JoshandSarahave
: womenwhosharethe takentheformatand
struggleof tryingto be madeit LGBT-friendly.
, whotheyareasartists Sarah'sa cuteJersey
• whiledealingwiththe , girlwholoveslesbian
preconceived
notions activistsandauthors.
Thepairaresweet,
of whatit is to bea
andgenuine,
: womananda mother. • adorable
It'saneye-opening ' anddowellat showandempowering
film. casingtheirguestsand
theirsmarts.[RL]
[Rachel
Lastra]
castasthe
Quite honestly, I am used to it.
ow o o d
ing?
Well, for me, this is about storytelling.
Film and television are the modern fire
circle. Back in the day people sat around
fires, told stories and got to drift off. ..
or learn a valuable lesson. My duty as
an actress is to serve the story. If I am
discouraged by the lack of well-developed
roles for women or mixed-race people,
I can always write and produce my own
stuff.[TaniaHammidi]
u
March 2009
I61
Mapping Meaning
QueerMap founder documents our history. By Kory Tran
FABLE
II OFFERS
ADVENTURE,
TREASURE
ANDLADY
LOVIN'
Goodor evil,femaleor male,
gayor straight-it's upto you
in Lionhead
Studios'fantasy
adventure
FableII,for Xbox
360.Asthe heroof Albion,
playersarefreeto bekind
or cruel,greedyor generous,
glamorous
or gluttonous.
And
thesedecisions
changeboth
howyourcharacterlooksand
howothercharacters
reactto
them.Hero-ingcanbelonely
work.Fortunately,
lesbian
marriageis far fromforbidden
inAlbion.Youcanwoothe
ladyof yourchoiceandsettle
down.(Justmakesureto
keepherhappywithcash,a
homeandevensomeoccasionalnookie.)
Thisdiabolicallyaddictivegameis readily
accessible
to all players.
With
a compelling
story,swashbucklingactionandcountless
sidequests,it's trulyepicstuff.
($60,gamestop.com)
[RachelShatto]
Caffyn Kelley does not believe lesbians should try
to be "normal:' The selridentified queer believes
that we should celebrate our differences and that
by exploring past social and cultural contexts we
can claim their power. "Queers can be an important
source of information and energy to change things;'
says Kelley. "Celebrating our capacity and history in
terms of cultural resonances of queer identity tends
to give us these powers, and not just deny and try to
normalize what it means to be queer:'
That is why Kelley founded QueerMap.com, a
website dedicated to "mapping"
out the cultural contributions
Get Wired
SheWired.com might make slow workdays go by just a little bit faster.
Launched by Regents Media, the site features columns and biogs by some
of today's most popular lesbian personalities. One of the most commented
upon blog entries from Staceyann Chin (right), "Talk Dirty to Me," has the
ladies thinking about how to use wordplay to get more, um, play while Cathy
DeBuono's video blog, What's Your Problem? offers irreverent and funny
advice on how to deal with life's ups and downs. If you can tear yourself away
from AfterEllen or Curve's site (shameless self-promotion), SheWired will have
you hooked on the latest news in lesbian culture, politics, travel, health and
lifestyle (and a sports forum called "Girls With Balls"). [ArisaWhite]
s21curve
that queers have
made in society.
QueerMap's image gallery features artwork from
around the queer world. The images date back to the
Middle Ages (inset), showing that homosexual culture has been around for hundreds of years.
In the dictionary section, she breaks down the
historical usage of words like "unnatural" and "exotic"
and examines how they stereotype queers. "I tried to
explore these stereotypes to see them for what
they really are: deep, rich archetypes;' says Kelley,
who also explores why there is such a stigma
attached to gays and lesbians. "I think that so much
of the way that power is organized is through
gender, the objectification of women. The existence of gays and lesbians poses a very profound
interrogation of the way power is organized:'
Kelley says the website is an ongoing projectshe is continually redoing the graphics and adding
more information. One of her latest additions is the
QueerMap Wiki, in which she invites LGBT writers, artists, students, "scholars" and "saints" to share
their own thoughts and suggestions.
"We can make the choice to be ordinary, to fit in
with the dominant society;' Kelley says. "But because
the unease is so profound, it's [starting to be] about
erasing differences:• ■
2
:E
Q
w
~
~
~
~
~
...J
~
~
g
~
~
ili
Flying High continued from page 3 7 ___
_
I kicked my legs and yelled. Claire gave me
che thumbs up and yelled something back.
She didn't see the duct tape.
Let me go on record here to say chat duct
cape has many uses. Take MacGyver: I swear
chat guy could build a catapult out of a tooth,
pick, a spool of fishing line and, of course, a
roll of duct tape. But I didn't want my life
depending on it.
I yelled as loud as I could. Red Bandana
and Mr. Clean waved from the boat. I chink
Claire was caking more pictures, but I was
going higher so she was getting smaller. I did
deep,breaching exercises. I talked to the birds
chat flew past. I wasn't going to cry. I swear,
they left me up there for hours. The coun,
ter man said I would be at maximum height
for 15 minutes, but surely they had forgot,
ten about me. And then I could see the boat
getting bigger, and Claire getting closer, and,
eventually, the taped part of the nylon rope
disappearing onto the pulley as Mr. Clean
reeled me in.
Once my feet hit the floor of the boat,
I exhaled. After I was unhooked, I started
pulling the rope off the large spool like a
madwoman. Claire asked what the hell I was
doing. Red Bandana tried to stop me but I
gave him what must have been the look of
death and he backed away with his hands up.
I found the part of the rope that had been
taped. I held it up for everyone to see and
said, ''Are you *"$%,ing kidding met
Red Bandana and Mr. Clean took us back
to the dock.
As it turned out, neither Red Bandana nor
Mr. Clean had the clearance of the owner,
nor the common sense to use the boat that
was actually meant to cake parasailers on the
bay. I find it necessary to mention that where
the tape was placed, the rope was not broken,
only "thin:' Thin. That made me feel so much
better. The owner was Red Bandana's uncle,
and since he was out of town, Red Bandana
figured he could make a few extra bucks.
When Gram and Ted realized what the hul,
labaloo was all about, Gram hugged me tight
and Ted just shook his head. Needless to say,
I got my money back and a whole slew of gift
certificates to some crab shack on the beach.
As we drove to dinner that evening, Gram
was still going on about how we had co come
back the following year. Claire and I stared
out of our respective windows at the sun set,
ting over the water, and Ted said, "I think I'll
have a nice steak:' [JessJones]
Lovin'the 'Bush continued from page 41 ___
_
many modalities of the healing arts team. My
preferred treatment is the hydrotherapy and
massage session. It includes an aromatherapy,
infused mineral water bath, followed by a
detoxifying herbal wrap and ending with Reiki
and a massage. Other treatments include deep
tissue, hot stone massage, trigger point and
myofascial release, to name just a few.
Before bed, I spend some time in the extra,
ordinary cedar sauna, in a cabin that rests
atop the bubbling waters of a capped geyser.
The lithium from the sauna's steam puts me in
the perfect state to crawl into bed and dream
of doing it all again the next day. The rustic
cabins are geothermally heated, as are all the
buildings. And if yours doesn't include a sink
and toilet, a bathhouse is nearby. Large tents
and personal campsites are also available dur,
ing the summer and fall.
But, if getting away on your own per,
sonal retreat is not enough to get you to
Breitenbush, one of the diverse workshops
and events should do the trick.
The Journal Writing for Lesbians work,
shop occurs every spring, during the last
week in April, and the annual Women in
the Woods event draws over 100 lesbian and
gay,positive women for four days of fun and
relaxation in August.
Another event to consider is the autumn
Women,Only Weekend, which offers two
workshops, Vipassana Retreat for Women
(meditation) and Women's Renewal Weekend
(stress,reduction). Or like me, you can simply
enjoy the opportunity for a quiet personal
retreat surrounded by women.
Other
women,specific
workshops
include the Women's SoulCollage Retreat,
Womanspiric: Celebrating Our Journey
and Reflections: For Women Who Want to
Choose What Really Matters! Of course,
workshop or personal retreat, it doesn't really
matter what gets you to the 'Bush, just that
you get there. You'll be glad you did. ■
March 2009
I 63
TOPTENREASONS
WELOVE
...
LesbianCa
• hters
Revealing two fierce female competitors. By Aislinn Clevenger
You might question why someone would
step into a cage to get punched in the face.
OK, cage fighting is more than a little
violent, but the brave mixed-martial-arts
(MMA) competitors who take part in it
are highly trained athletes, both physically
and mentally, so it's easy to understand why
this professional sport is gaining popularity.
Enter Tonya Evinger and Stephanie "Mitee
Mouse" Palmer. Both are fierce female fighters. Both are lesbians who are truly fighting
in a man's world. Here's why we love lesbian
cage fighters.
1. They're trailblazers. With an illustrious past in freestyle wrestling, 27 -year-old
Evinger began training in MMA in 2004.
"I've wrestled for a long time and there's
nothing for me to use all those years of training for except fighting," Evinger explains of
her transition. "I might as well do it the legal
way and get paid for it:'
will never make the same money, never get
the same recognition;' says Evinger.
ity, either. "I was never in the closet but as
long as people are talking about it, it's more
publicity for me:'
5. They'reshowingup the guys."Of course,"
says Evinger, "the guy fighters hate that we
are out there doing their sport. I don't really
care about all that. If you're a female athlete,
you have dealt with this through every sport
and it's just another excuse for me to train
harder:'
8. They'recomingoutontop.Palmer has only
two professional fights under her belt but
she insists she doesn't fight to be the best
because she's already accomplished more than
most women ever will. "I just want to put on
a good show for the fans and supporters:'
6.They'rebuilding
community.
Fighting has also
inspired Evinger to form her own all-women's
team. "I am recruiting girls that I wrestled
with throughout the years. I will train them,
9. Fightingis nottheironlygoal."I have always
wanted to be a coach," Evinger says. "I coach
Malissa [my girlfriend) and both my brothers and they aren't getting beat up yet, so I
and mark my words right now: We will be
the best female team of elite athletes in the
world:' Evinger will also make sure that these
women get the attention they deserve by taking them to Dinah Shore Week.
must be doing something right. I guess we'll
have to see when I get my girls' team going.
I'll have to prove it to everyone:'
2. They'retough."Just because I'm a dyke,
most guys tend to think I'm stronger just
based on my appearance;' says Palmer, who
trains with Team Sturgis in Alabama and
has trained in martial arts since she was 5.
"They seem to think that I can hit harder
and take stronger punches because of it. I
just tell them if they want to hit me like a
man, don't hold any punches then:'
3. They'rehot.With toned physiques, rippling
muscles and don't-mess-with-me attitudes,
these fighters have what it takes.
4. They're lesbiansgettingairtime. Evinger,
who boasts seven professional wins and only
three losses, competes for ProElite, Inc., an
MMA organization whose EliteXC fights
air on Showtime and CBS. ProElite, unlike its competitors, including the Ultimate
Fighting Championship, took a chance on
broadcasting female fights and considers
itself the gold standard for women fighters.
But women still fall short of the big-time
success their male counterparts enjoy. "We
64
Icurve
7. They'reproud.Though being a woman in
such a violent sport generally overshadows
being a lesbian, it still makes an impact. "I
think it's actually helpful because the guys
don't really have to hold back on stuff they
say, because I'm just as bad as they are,"
Evinger says. And being in the public eye
doesn't faze her when it comes to her sexual-
10. They play other sports,too. Aside from
her two part-time jobs and training 15 to
20 hours a week, Palmer is a linebacker for
the Tennessee Valley Tigers, an all-woman
football team. Palmer has also played for the
Huntsville Renegades, and she sees football
as a positive addition to her training regime.
"It's a whole new kind of training that I
don't get from fighting. I enjoy it and I will
be sticking with it:' ■
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curve
THE BEST-SELLING
MARCH 2009
I
LESBIAN MAGAZINE
VOLUME 19 NUMBER 2
Publisher and Founder Frances Stevens
EDITORIAL
Editor in Chief Diane Anderson-Minshall
Managing Editor Katie Peoples
Assistant Editor Rachel Beebe
Book Review Editor Rachel Pepper
Music Review Editor Margaret Coble
Contributing Editors Julia Bloch, Victoria A. Brownworth,
Gina Daggett, Sheryl Kay, Gretchen Lee, Stephanie Schroeder,
Rachel Shatto
Copyeditor Katherine Wright
Editorial Assistants Kim Bale, Ainsley Drew, Mary Foulk, LaKeisha
Hughes, Nina Lary, Rachel Lastra, Anna Lonnberg, Heather
Robinson, Fernanda Silva
PUBLISHING
Advertising Sales Diana L. Berry, Rivendell Media
Social Networking Lindy Shelton
Magazine publishers pay a lot of lip service to the environment but face it,
magazines themselves are often a big drain on natural resources. At curve,
we've been printed on partially recycled paper for years and we recycle
almost everything at the office, but since we're all a bunch of ecochicks we've
wanted to find some way to really reduce our environmental impact and
still afford to do business (sadly, soy inks and even more low-impact paper
costs even more). So we've changed the size of the magazine, which you may
not even notice ( unless you compare it to our old issues). But just that little
change will save about 20,000 pounds of paper-and
lower our usage of
energy, transportation fuel and inks.
We're doing a bit of recycling on our cover too, the best kind though. We
were so enamored of Rose Rollins, the butchy tough Army veteran from The
L Word who graced our cover last spring, that we asked her to come back
again. As one of the few female vets on a regular TV series, Rollins has a
tough task in wartime. That she gets to cozy up to Leisha Hailey, one of the
sexiest lesbians alive, probably makes it a little bit easier.
For our annual travel issue we wanted to do something different. We know
that despite the recession, lesbians are still traveling more than their non-gay
counterparts. But we're savvy sisters, so we want more bang for our buck.
We chose a few off-the-beaten-path destinations that won't break the bank.
In Cairns, you can snorkel the Great Barrier Ree£ visit the jungle and stay
at a hostel that's as nice as a hotel. In Oregon, you can soak at a world-class
spa, find your emotional center and keep prices down to three digits. From
Florida to Mexico to California, we have quick and easy trips you'll be dying
to read about. Even better, artist and musician Lynn Breedlove chronicled a
whirlwind trip through Paris' lesbian nightclub scene that had everyone at
our office itching to find a cheap flight on Travelocity to France.
We hope you have time to find some travel escapes of your own this year. If
you find something amazing, email us and tell us all about it.
ART
/PRODUCTION
Art Director Stefanie Liang
Photo Editors Nicole Arseneault, Hayley McMillen
Production Manager Ondine Kilker
Production Artist Kelly Nuti
Web Producer Nikki Woelk
Photo Assistants Katy Gross, Kasey Neuenschwander
CONTRIBUTING
WRITERS
Kathy Beige, Kelsy Chauvin, Jennifer Corday, Lyndsey
D'Arcangelo, Michele Fisher, Tania Hammidi, Kathi lsserman,
Gillian Kendall, Kate Lacey, Charlene Lichtenstein, Karlyn Lotney,
Candace Moore, Alison Peters, Catherine Plato, Aimsel L. Ponti,
Laurie K. Schenden, Erin Siegal, Kristin A. Smith, Dave Steinfeld,
Edie Stull, Jocelyn Voo, Melany Walters-Beck
CONTRIBUTING
ILLUSTRATORS
& PHOTOGRAPHERS
Paul Michael Aguilar, Michelle Bart, Erica Beckman, Phil Cho,
Cheryl Craig, Tony Donaldson, Sophia Hantzes, Gabriela Hashun,
Cassandra Olander, Maggie Parker, Faye Sadou, Elisa Shebaro,
Katherine Streeter, Kina Williams, Misty Winter
1550 Bryant Street, Suite 510
San Francisco, CA 94103
Phone (415) 863-6538 Fax (415) 863-1609
Advertising Sales (415) 863-6538 ext. 1O or (212) 446-6700
Subscription Inquiries (818) 286-3102
Advertising Email advertising@curvemag.com
Editorial Email editor@curvemag.com
Letters to the Editor Email letters@curvemag.com
Volume 19 Issue 2 Curve (ISSN 1087-867)() is published monthly (except for bimonthly
January/February and July/August) by Outspoken Enterprises. Inc., 1550 Bryant St.,
Ste. 510, San Francisco, CA 94103. Subscription price: $49.95/year, $62.95 Canadian
(U.S. funds only) and $71.95 international (U.S. funds only). Returned checks will be assessed
a $25 surcharge. Periodicals pcstage paid at San Francisco, CA 94114 and at additional
mailing offices (USPS 0010-355). Contents of Curve Magazine may net be reproduced In any
manner, ertherwhole or in part, Without wntten permission from the publisher. Publicationof
the name or photograph of any persons or organizations appeanng, advertising or listing In
Curve may net be taken as an Ind1cationof the sexual orientation of that individual or group
unless specifically stated. Curve welcomes letters, queries. unsolicited manuscripts and
artwork. Include SASE for respcnse. Lack of any representation only signifies insufficient
materials. Submissions cannot be returned unless a self-addressed stamped envelope is
included. No respcns,bility is assumed for loss or damages. The contents do net necessarily
represent the opinions of the edrtor. unless specffically stated. AJImagazines sent discreetly.
Subscnption Inquiries: Please wnte to Curve, 1550 Bryant Street, Suite 510. San Francisco,
CA 94103, email shop@curvemag.com, or call 818-286-3102. Canadian Agreement
Number: 40793029. Postmaster:SendGanadianaddresschangesto shop@curvemag.com.
Curve.
PO Box 122, Niagara Falls, ON L2E 6S8. Send U.S. addresschangesto shop@curvemag.com.
Curve.PO Box 17138,N. Hollywood,CA 91615-7138.PrintedIn the U.S.
curvemag.com
21curve
Features MARCH2009
30
2
The Real JT Leroy
Queer author Savannah Knoop tells us her
side of one of literature's greatest hoaxes. By
Diane Anderson-Minshall
The L Word's Rose Rollins
It's time to say goodbye to Tasha. Rollins looks
backward and forward. By Rachel Shatto
46
Urban Guerrilla
Dyke fashion never looked so good.
48
Eight Green Cars for '09
We've got hot rides that'll turn heads and save
the planet. By Evelyn Block
50
Calendar Girls
Hot female mechanics turn the girly calendar
on its head. We like it. By Rachel Shatto
52
LGBT Teens on the Streets
Homeless queer youth in New York City struggle
to find a place to call home. By Kristen \I. Brown
33
Vacations
YouCanAfford
City Slickers
34
Australian Paradise
36
Flying High in Mexico & Florida
38
40
4
4
I curve
Find your inner cowgirl on a backcountry
horse drive. By Melissa Fondakowski
Get the sun, the sand and the Great Barrier
Reef in Cairns. By Jen Berkowitz
Parasailing lets you see a whole lot more.
By Aimsel L. Ponti and Jess Jones
California Dreamin'
Who needs the Mediterranean when you can
go to Santa Barbara? By Catherine Plato
I Love the Nightlife in Paris
Find out where to go to find the lesbian
scene in France. By Lynn Breedlove
Hippie Soaks in Oregon
Nothing beats a good old-fashioned spa
getaway and Breitenbush does it best.
By Aislinn Clevenger
"Itwas sucha great experience...
But it'sdefinitelytime for it to end.
I mean, it's been sixyears,and
it's betterto go out on a highnote
than to go out becauseno one is
watchingit." Rose Rollins >> page 42
Departments MARCH2009
Advice
Relationships: How to survive your first
Frankly Speaking
lesbian cruise-relationship
Letters
Health: Lesbian health through the ages.
What are your risks in your 20s, 30s, 40s?
Contributors
This Is What a Lesbian Looks Like
Open Studio
Out in Front
AstroGrrl
intact.
Dyke Drama
Fifty ways to leave your lover? Here's one.
Politics
Hello? Is it ever going to be about us?
Scene
Lipstick & Dipstick
Fairy Butch
Top Ten Reasons We Love ...
Entertainment Reviews
Music: Hot country tunes from Lee Ann
Womack and Lucinda Williams. Prima
J gets our props. A Q&A with guitarist
Ronnda Cadle.
Books: A butch cookbook, Alison
Curvatures
A shoemaker, divas we love and a book
about beautiful female bodies. Oh, and a
few chicks who ping our gaydar this month.
Celebrity Gossip
Lisa Alvarez is so hot, Jackie Warner is on
the make, Melissa speaks out and Brooke
gabs about Grey's Anatomy.
Bechdel, 37 days to inspiration, a oneon-one with illustrator Liz Baillie and a
children's book about a tyke who likes
dresses.
6
Film: Wanda Sykes, The L Word, Queen
Raquela,vampires, a new karate kid and up
close and personal with Traci Dinwiddie.
Tech: Get your game on with FableII.
Caffyn Kelley explains her QueerMaps and
SheWired goes live.
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Icurve
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LETTERS
great to be able to read my magazine anywhere I want and at any time I want without the fear of turning over a page to reveal
#1), I really enjoyed the sections that were
pictures of various dildos and other
aimed at the girls who are just
adult toys. I found this to be a huge
coming out. As a "newbie" myself,
problem with my last magazine of
it helps to read other testimonials
choice and it ruins the general readand get tips and advice from those
ing experience. I won't name names.
who have already been through
I find curve such a refreshit (as I'm sure you know).
ing read and totally loved
To see that in the magathe December 2008 issue
zine was awesome and I
(Vol. 18 #10) with Heather
hope you have more of it
Matarazzo
on the cover.
in future issues! Thanks!
Which Show Most
She's
come
a
long way since
-Jessica Lindsey,
Deserves a Lesbian
Welcome to the Dollhouse!
Raleigh, N.C.
Character?
-Amanda C., Kildare,
Ireland
Th nks Ladi s'
44% CSl(above)
I'm taking a little minute
16% Heroes
Correction
out of my busy workday to
The correct webdrop you a line. Just wanted
15% GossipGirl
site address for
to say thank you so much.
Sarah Kramer's
I wrote in recently after
13% Lost
vegan cookbook,
having discovered curve.
13% UglyBetty
Vegan A Go-Go!, listed in
Straight away I got a subour December Gift Guide, is
scription, which by the way
According
to a
is excellent value! It's so
Go Vegan.net.
curvemag.com
poll
Note from a N wbie
In the most recent issue of curve (Vol. 19
Poll
?
I usually love Lipstick and Dipstick, but their
December column, "Under the Mistletoe"
(Vol. 18 #10), was very disappointing. The
lesbian community should be trying to break
down judgments against queers and women,
not encourage them. They told one fan she
deserved to be slapped and avoided, essentially because she suggested that lesbians
are capable of casual sex. (Some aren't, but
I shouldn't have to tell you we're as diverse
as any group!) Then, a teenager asked how
she might have her first orgasm, and instead
of giving simple advice (hello, masturbation!)
they spent the whole "response" making fun of
her sexual experience and telling her that once
she has "meaningful sex" (another insulting
assumption) she'll either get there or need to
go to a doctor. What is with this misinformation, harsh judgment of female sexuality and
support of lesbian stereotypes? This is what
we turn to curve over Cosmo to avoid.
-Deb Johnson, Tucson, Ariz.
Thank you, Lipstick and Dipstick, for the
advice you gave Itchy in Illinois, "Do You
Know Your Lingo?" in the November issue
[Vol. 18 #9). I'm 27 and am just coming out
and was told by a friend of mine that all the
rainbow tees, jewelry and car decals were
a bit much. While I do want to meet the
right woman, I had no idea where to begin.
Dipstick's bar idea was a little scary but I've
listened to Lipstick about networking and
I've met a few new friends. Thanks.
-Baby Lezzie,Jacksonville, Fla.
s j curve
Long Live Cherrie Moraga!
In our Decemberissue[Vol.18 #10],we made a grave error and misquotedLenelle
Mo'iseas callingthe award-winningwriterCherrfeMoraga (picturedbelow)"the
late CherrfeMoraga."How this happenedis stillup for debate in the Editorial
Department(No. 1 excuse:lack of caffeine),but it goes withoutsayingthat we're
all more than embarrassedaroundhere. Pleasedon't take away our rainbow
passes!Below is the letterwe receivedfrom Mo'iseclearingup the mistake.
AlthoughI am honoredto be featured in your December 2008 issue("It'sStory
Time,"page 53), I was shockedand disturbedto discovera glaringtypo in the
last paragraphof the publishedQ&A. I was misquotedas citing "the late Cherrie
Moraga"as one of my many influences.
I must informyou that-much to my delight-the great poet, playwright,teacher,
feministand LGBTQactivistCherrfeMoraga is thrivingand very much alive!In
fact, in April2008, I gentlygreeted her at the New WORLD Theater'sCreative
Uprising(s)conference.She is a livinglegend,one of my artisticheroes.
Needlessto say,as a poet, I am very carefulwith my words. I
was disappointedto find myselfinaccuratelyquoted, spreading misinformation,in your internationallydistributedmagazine.
Yoursin the strugglefor accuracy,
Lene/leMoise
Northampton,Mass.
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CONTRIBUTORS
From the
Editor
As we were busy
f
"From the moment I met Inguna Skuja and Melissa Braden,
I knew this couple was extraordinary;' says editorial assistant
Mary Foulk,who wrote about them on page 16. "Passionate
and prolific, they sizzle in person and on the page. What an
honor it was to interview them and learn more about their
sensual art and dynamic collaboration:' A writer and an educator, Foulk lives in Portland, Ore., with her wife and their
son. Her work has appeared in Mombian, Lesbian Life at
About.com, Hip Mama, the New York Times, Activistas, Whos
Your Mama: The Voices of Unsung Women and Mothers (Soft Skull Press) and VoiceCatcher3.
When not devouring the latest lesbian news and gossip or stalking her favorite queer artists,
she enjoys exploring the incredible views of the Pacific Northwest, critiquing lesbian movies
and attempting to read something ocher than anxiety-provoking parenting guides.
putting this issue
together-literally
the second day of
the new year-we
all had resolutions
on our minds. Katie
wants to start saving money on a monthly basis
(no more lattes!). Stefanie wants
to call her parents more than
once a month. Diana has sworn
off dating (we'll see how long
Editorial assistant LaKeishaHughesloves to snuggle up with a
good book while drinking Thai tea, listening to rock music and
writing poetry on the side. "I remember the first time that I read
curve. I was 14 years old;' Hughes recalls. "Back then, I was a
young teenage girl coming into my sexuality and trying to find
a way to tell my mother that I was a lesbian. I went to Barnes &
Noble and picked up the May 1999 issue, with Ellen DeGeneres
and her mom. Right after reading that issue, I came out of the
closet and became an avid reader of curve. I told myself chat I
would write for them one day, and here I am:'
that lasts). And me? I want to
travel to more exotic locales
(not just the Chinese restaurant
near my office). I'd be happy,
too, to just take more road trips
in the U.S .. Photographer Sarah
Lyons took a road trip I surely
envy: the Kentucky-based
lenswoman went cross-country
Since she was a child people have been asking editorial assistant
RachelLastra"What's wrongt To which she generally replies,
"Nothing. My face just settles this waY:' Lastra is a poet and an
aspiring novelist who quit her boring office job for the chance to
work at curve. When she isn't tapping away at a keyboard, you
can usually find her with her nose in a book or watching a truly
appalling amount of reality television. Her best curve memory?
Interviewing pop star Lady Gaga for curvemag.com. "It was hilarious;' she says, "She kept comparing herself to Andy Warhol:' What's next on the horizon?
"Paying off my student loans ... and writing the Great American Novel, of course:' Look for
one of her poems in the January issue of Cherry Bleeds, a literary magazine.
shooting pictures of hot female
mechanics, many of them
lesbian. We've printed just a
tiny selection in
our auto section.
Cool cars, hot
chicks. What's
not to envy
there? Maybe
she'll take me
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Originally from Santa Fe, N.M., photo assistant KatyGrossmoved
to San Francisco last September. When the economy crashed,
and she couldn't find a full-time job, working at curve was one
of the few things that kept her going. Gross has been doing photography since she was 14. Her documentary photo projects have
allowed her to meet some very interesting people, including ghost
hunters in Maine and newspaper vendors in Santa Fe. Postcurve, she plans to go back co school to gain some more media
skills before she tries, for a second time, to enter the real world.
on the next trip. Check out her
photos on page 50. Are you
drooling, too?
Diane Anderson-Minshall
Editor in Chief
March 2009
I9
curvatures
Arizona Designer's Happy Feet
It's no wonder Tamera Lyndsay has a legion of rock
girl fans like Joan Jett and Annie Lennox: She played
bass in D.C:s first all-girl band, Chalk Circle. But,
since 1993, Tamera Lyndsay, out owner and designer
of Wilma Accessories, Ltd., has been producing
high-end, custom-made shoes, bringing the art of
European shoe- and boot-making stateside. Her fun
and impressive designs wowed lesbians after an appearance on The L Word's fourth season.
Lyndsay hails from the East Village art scene,
where she was a leader in the '80s high-design move-
ment, producing her own millinery and accessory
lines. After an apprenticeship in bootmaking
with craftsman Bob McLean, Lyndsay launched
Wilma Accessories. She found that few design
schools offered training in shoemaking, so, while
she was apprenticing, she worked in a shoe repair
shop to learn everything she could about shoes and
get the foundation she needed to begin designing
them.
It was this dearth of training available inspired
Lyndsay to buy up antique shoemaking equipment from eBay and establish The Shoe College at
Wilma Accessories, Ltd. Beginners and advanced
shoemakers come to the college from around the
world and from a variety of backgrounds to learn
classic shoemaking. Lyndsay, who calls her own
aesthetic "Functional, elegant, rugged, intelligent;'
says The Shoe College is defined by its emphasis on the
basic technical and artistic aspects of shoemaking.
In addition to teaching, Lyndsay continues
to work as a designer, producing beautiful leatherbound books, high-end stationery, custom-made
upholstery, furniture and ( a fave among her lesbian
fans) rockin' wrist wallets. [MeaChavez]
SOMETHING'S
FISHYHERE
Don'tbefooledbythe fishy
exterior.Koo-KiSushiis
Belgianchocolatehand
formedintooddlycutesushi
shapes.Getthe multi-piece
Bento,ChoeSticksanda
Kanpai!sakecupfor those
dayswhenthe hungerinside
youdemandssomethingout
of the ordinary.Butbeware,
it faresas badlyin the sun
as the realthing-ours
meltedintoa brightlycoloredlumpwhenwe left it
nearthe windowonebright
day.($5andup,kookisushi.com)[RachelBeebe]
Diva Delights
Resolving
to getfit againthisyear?Well,at leastlooksmokin'while
doingit.You'lltunein,getinspired,lookdapperandbefoxywithour
topspringtime
sportspicks.Theseitemsarefunctionalenoughto work
outin,yetstylishenoughfor pickingupthe hotties.[AnnaLonnberg]
Puta springin your
stepwhilelistening
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of the '70s and earty '80s has a great
Sapphic twist and includes LIiy Tomlin
(pictured), Pat Carrol (of Gertrude Stein
fame) and my geeky favorite, Carrie
boys, but Divas (Universe), a beautiful
book of photographs by After Darlc's
Kenn Duncan, was hard to resist. The
gorgeous photos of infamous women
Fisher. These beautiful and playful photos should not be missed. [KatiePeoples]
March 2009
I 11
the rundown
Grab your Dramamine and sunscreen
because RSVPCruises
has announced that
it will have five all-gay cruises this year,
which include destinations in the Eastern
Caribbean and the
Mexican Riviera ...
It turns out the
global recession
doesn't hurt so
much if you' re a
retailer of trans
fashions. Canadian
retailer Geniethe
Crossdress
Storehas
actually seen an increase in sales, presumably due to the fact that they serve a niche
market ... Actor JadaPinkettSmithhas admitted that she "enjoyed" playing a lesbian
in the recent mediocre box office offering
The Women. "I wish I could have been
more of a lesbian
in the movie;' the
Matrix Reloaded
star added. We
do too ... Want to
fulfill that dream
of going to grad
school, but aren't sure how you can possibly afford it? Check out the new series,
Grad School Finances, from the LGBToriented finance blog Queercents
...
According to a recently released GLAAD
poll, 64 percentof adults in the United
States favor allowing openly gay people
to serve in the military, and 69 percentoppose laws that ban same-sex couples from
adopting children ... Two women were arrested and imprisoned for a month while
visiting Dubaiafter they were seen engaging in the "indecent" act of kissing each
other in public ... Former Greys Anatomy
star Isaiah Washington, who made headlines in 2007 when he was fired from the
show for making homophobic comments
about one of his costars, has criticized
ABC for firing actor Brooke Smith, who
played an openly lesbian character on the
show. "I think it's disgusting;' the actor
said in an interview with TV Guide...
ShilohJolie-Pitt,Brad Pitt and Angelina
Jolie's 2-year-old daughter, is exploring her gender identity. Pitt told Oprah
Winfrey, "She only wants to be called
John. John or Peter:' [RachelLastra]
12Icurve
Our Lady Parts, Ourselves
Tired of seeing our most special lady parts portrayed as either
explicitly sexual or prudishly clinical, and rarely as something
"sacred, special and worthy of respect"? Art director Teresa
Giamos and out photographer Louise Broussard of Dallas have
set out to change all that, with their coffee table book, Woman.
The project was born of a conversation between Giamos
and her sister about how women view their bodies. "Most women
are unaware of the appearance of their genitalia, and are taught
that [they are] considered dirty and utilitarian, which results in a
cultural and societal taboo that commands that it not be seen ...
my desire was to counter that specific taboo," says Giamos.
Giamos and Broussard met through a fellow photographer.
Broussard quickly fell in love with Giamos' idea of women (including those that are intersex or transgender) expressing themselves
through portraits taken in a way that allowed the subject to find beauty in a part of
her body that she might not perceive as beautiful. "We wanted it to be a softer, prettier way for the women to relate, and feel good about the picture [we] were taking.
And even be able to put it up on their wall if they want," Broussard says.
The project has been a powerful experience for Giamos, a sexual abuse survivor, who grew up with the belief that her vagina was something to feel ashamed of.
"While photographing these women, I have come to better understand the vagina's
intricacies and ultimate beauty. It really is a wonderful part of who we are as
females. The book is helping me see this," she says. [RachelShatto]
The Gaydar
Here's a taste of lesbians in pop culture this month.
Who missed the mark and who was right on target?
MTV'sDouble
Shotat love.
Fauxbisexual
twins?Asif MTV
neededto get
skankier.
Only in San Francisco
You'llhave so many new storiesto tell, you'll need proof.Findout what's new in SFat onlyinsanfrancisco.com/gaytravel
gay.
®
Sheraton
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THE L
LRY COLLECTION
ST REGIS
WESTIN
PHOTOS PROVIDED BY (TOP ROW) CASTRO: ALAN SO CHINAGATE GIRLS: GOLDEN GATE BUSINESS ASSOCIATION LOVE MOMS: DEBORAH 0. LATTIMORE (MIDDLE ROW) COIT TOWER: ZACHARY BRUNS
SMILING WOMEN: DEBORAH 0. LATTIMORE FOLSOM WOMAN: FRAN KALERT (BOTTOM ROW) GOLDEN GATE BOYS: GOLDEN GATE BUSINESS ASSOCIATION HAIGHT LEGS: ALAN SO DYKES ON BIKES: R GERHARTER
LESBOFILE
GirlsTalkingBack
Warner warms up and Etheridge tells it like it is. By Jocelyn Voo
Girlfriend? Special lady friend? You are gonna have to help me here because I am not
sure what to call her now;' MelissaEtheridge
blogged on The Daily Beast. "Anyways, she
and I are not allowed the same right under
the state constitution as any other citizen.
0 K, so I am taking that to mean I do not
have to pay my state taxes because I am
not a full citizen. I mean that would just be
wrong, to make someone pay taxes and not
give them the same rights, sounds sort oflike
that taxation without representation thing
from the history books:'
After Jackie Warner's
verbal gaffe on Work
Out last year, which
cost the show at least
one major sponsor,
Bravo execs are anxious to up their ratingswith more sex appeal, of course. According
to gossip queen JanetCharlton,
Warner was
told to get a hotter girlfriend, so Warner
tried to chat up filmmaker LisaAlvarez.
"Lisa
didn't seem terribly interested, so Jackie
invited her to her birthday party at Club
11, and insisted on posing for photos with
her;' Charlton reports. "Jackie was annoyed
because Lisa brought a date to the party, but
she's not giving up and continues to pursue
Lisa:' Alvarez, however, denies that there's
anything between the two, telling curve,
'Jackie and I are just friends. That little kiss
was just posed for a photographer friend of
ours that egged it on just for fun. We were just
having dinner to discuss the Bravo network.
After all... two tops do not make a bottom:'
The Bravo-ratings theory might also
explain why Warner was spotted at the '08
Pride parade frolicking about town with actor
CatherineKeener's
Sapphic little sis, Elizabeth
14
I curve
Keener,
aka Dawn on The L Word.
"We were told that Jackie broke up with
her bartender girlfriend, BrianaStockton,
who
works at Club 11, on Tuesday, and that same
night was seen passionately making out with
Elizabeth on the sidewalk;' Charlton writes.
"In the last few days, Jackie and Elizabeth
also turned up at Republic and the Abbey,
holding hands and looking very affectionate:'
Warner's really working it out this season!
OneStepForward,
OneStepBack
Nov. 4, 2008, was the historic day when
Barack Obama became the first African
American to be elected president of the
United States. However, there was a somber
tinge to that significant day when California,
Arizona and Florida all passed propositions
that said these states would not recognize
same-sex marriages.
EllenDeGeneres,
who wed PortiaDeRossi,
released a statement saying that she was
"saddened beyond belie£ Here we just had a
giant step toward equality and then on the
very next day, we took a giant step away:'
Taxation
WithoutRepresentation
"So my wife, uh, I mean, roommate?
Doesa BodyGood
Consider this anecdote a dispatch from the
Department of WTF: Madonna'sbrother
Christopher Ciccone, who has released his
tell-all book Life With My Sister Madonna,
revealed that he once went out partying with
his sis and DemiMoore,who ended up getting
more than a bit rowdy. According to The Sun,
Ciccone recalled, "We went out and Demi
was dancing up on me and humping me from
behind. She was lactating at the time and
she was squirting breast milk at my lesbian
friends. My friend Michelle called me the
next morning and asked me: 'How do I get
breast milk out of my black dress?'
"I replied: 'How the fuck would I know?
Call Demi!'"
5
Maybe,MaybeNot
~
"I think it's pretty obvious who I'm seeing," l
Lindsay Lohan told Harper's Bazaar-in ~ ,
?
case anyone's been living in a cave for the ~
past year and hasn't heard about her and ~
SamanthaRonson."I think it's no shock to c
anyone that it's been going on for quite some
1
time ... She's a wonderful person and I love ~
her very much:' But despite her candor, she ~
clammed up when it came to her past-and, )
it seems, her future. When asked if she'd pre- f
viously been with a girl, Lohan responded, "I t
don't know, maybe:• She said that she doesn't '.1consider herself a lesbian. But a bisexual?
"Maybe:' Wait, we thought this was an inter- view with Lohan, not TilaTequila.
■
She Said
g
e
er
IS
a,
h
g
n,
d
n
n
e
d
0
e
e
e
't
r-
I OPENSTUDIO
Clockwise from left: "Riga Isn't
Finished Yet! Ill"; "Dancing Girls";
"Double Portrait"; "Alien Nation";
"Serene Reflection"
The LesbiansFromLatvia
Artists lnguna Skuja and Melissa Braden are going home again. By Mary Foulk
w
a
bi
h
The Latvian ceramic artist Inguna Skuja was already a celebrity back in 1999 when she and her partner, Melissa Braden,
started working together. Skuja had been voted one of the
sexiest women in Latvia by Klub magazine. "I had heard
that 'the Lesbian' was coming," Skuja laughs, remembering
the pair's first meeting. The couple fell in love when Braden
was studying at Riga's Art Academy. Since then, Skuja and
Braden-who is originally from Sacramento, Calif.-have
collaborated as the artistic duo Skuja Braden.
Their talents drew them together. "I had never seen
anything like (Inguna's ceramics] and I thought it was the
most incredibly beautiful work I'd ever seen;' Braden says.
"We understood each other's thinking ... [and)
had very similar tastes:' Because of the language
barrier, the couple learned to communicate in alternative ways. "I don't know how we did it because Inguna's English was so bad at the time;' recalls Braden. "Some of our most successful pieces
are actually rooted in the space between understanding and misunderstanding:'
Passionate and prolific, the artists have
crafted an extensive body of work. Memories of
Latvia and the Baltic region permeate their pieces,
as well as a vital celebration of women's sensual-
ity and eroticism. Zen Buddhism has also had a profound
influence on their process, and on their growth as artists.
But what's a lesbian to do when she's dating the Latvian
equivalent to Angelina Jolie:' She dives in head first, but
not without consequences. Many gay people are closeted
in Latvia. Homophobia persists, and the couple has dealt
with both verbal and physical harassment. In 2001 they
moved to California so that they could live more freely as a
couple. They subsequently moved to Oregon and, despite
their fears about being marginalized and going back into
the closet, they moved back to Riga in January.
Skuja and Braden have been unable to get married,
so they have been left with few options. In fact, many of
their recent pieces deal with the problems surrounding the
institution of marriage and the fight for equal rights for gay
couples. "The thing that kind of sucks, being a bi-national
couple, is the whole having to pick up and go all the time ...
it's really important, actually, for artists to be in the same
place for a long period of time. But then, we have this theory that maybe in the long run it will be better ... it gives us
insights into both of our cultures in a way that if we weren't
living this life, it wouldn't be possible to see these kinds of
connections and misconnections. If you never live in each
other's country, you will never understand that person:' ■
ar
es
m
pe
d
a
Fa
se
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w
a
16
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m the Broward
hes Ordinance with the
1 orientation clause chat
ay men and lesbians in
:nt and places of pubThe revised ordinance
unique in Florida's legal
l says chat her wake-up
xother died from AIDS.
:1 left me with a sorrow
I was able to forge into
and then went on to work as a coach at the
University of Massachusetts at Amherst.
She began speaking out about homophobia
in sports, making her first speech in 1982
at a national conference on women's sports.
Griffin took her experiences nationwide
when she wrote Strong Women, Deep Closets,
a seminal work that explores the lives of lesbian athletes and coaches as they navigate the
homophobic world of sports.
Now in her retirement, Griffin is director of It Takes a Team!, an initiative of the
Women's Sports Foundation. "I get to travel
around the country talking to athletes, coaches and parents about my favorite topicmaking sports open and respectful for LGBT
people;' says Griffin. "I am incredibly lucky to
do the work I love, and know that work is a
small contribution to achieving equality in
and out of spores:'
FaithandActivism
Islam is intricately woven into the fabric of
RaquelEvitaSaraswati's
life. She says she is
quite traditional, praying daily, fasting during
the month of Ramadan, offering zakat (charity) and choosing to wear the hijab headdress.
One of the most important lessons she's taken
from the Koran is the teaching on justice.
"Equally important to me is dissent, when dissent is ethically necessary;' says Saraswati. "The
Koran tells us to be champions for justiceeven if our family and friends don't approve:'
At only 25 years old, Saraswati has
worked tirelessly in several capacities: as
a coordinator of Project Ijcihad and ex-
an indomitable will to refuse to be treated as
a second-class citizen, either by the straight
powers that were, or by the local gay men politicos who were entirely unaccustomed to a
smart, attractive, ballsy lesbian who wouldn't
take no for an answer;' says Bodiford.
Bodiford specializes in estate planning,
wills, trusts and powers of attorney for the
LGBT community and stresses the need to
consult with professionals who understand
the unique legal issues faced by queers."It is
crucial chat one's attorney is not only gay or
In Defense
of Equality
gay-friendly, but experienced in the nuances
Fort Lauderdale, Fla.-based attorney Robin of prejudice and the lack of basic rights we
have as gay couples;' she said. ■
Bodifordhas been credited with helping to
issue with Saraswati and her interpretation of
Islam, and her life has been threatened many
times. She concedes that it's sometimes scary,
but nothing deters her.
"We live in a world in which child rape
victims are being stoned;' she says. "Knowing
this, what is being called a few names or
receiving threats? As an American, I have
enormous freedom. If I do not use chat freedom to work for human rights, I, in fact, do
not deserve the air in my lungs:'
March 2009
I 17
ASTRO
GRRL
Can't Buy Me Love
Aarchmight be tricky, or it might be a treat. By Charlene Lichtenstein
p·sces(Feb.20-March20)
Sex:Love has a price tag. Will you be able to afford
her? Or maybe it's you who can be bought. Let's hope
so. Career:
Get out into the social whirl and expand
your list of contacts. The women you meet now will
worship you for the goddess you hope to become.
Ar'es(March21-April20)
Sex:Your best,kept secrets are exposed! She knows
exactly how you feel about her. Maybe that was your
intention all the time. Career:There is too much
going on behind the scenes at work. Lambda Rams
are advised to take a vacation, or at least a long lunch.
cially industrious at work now. Libras can tackleany
detailed task with relish. Add some sharp mustard,
with tons of baloney.
Scorpio(Oct24-Nov.22)
Sex: Working late will only make your girlfriend
angry and lonely. Try to leave the paperworkto
underlings and spend more rime pushing yourpaper
clip at home. Career:
You are aching to just havefun
chis March. So either make yourself scarceat workor
find creative ways to make the workday happier.Yes,
extended coffee breaks!
Gemini
(May22-June21)
Sex:A mild crush turns into a saucy lovergrrl. Is this
just a quick fling or something more permanent? Don't
drip on your clothing. Career:
You are magnificent and
effective at work. Even the senior bosses are impressed
with you. Ask for a raise before they wise up.
Sagittarius
(Nov.23-0ec.22)
Sex:Take everything to the outer limits this March.
or only are you primed and positioned for romance,
you are on someone's tasting menu. Career:
Work
from home, if you can. And if you can't, lightenyour
workload by delegating and going to meetings.
Cancer
(June22-July23)
Sex:You'll charm your way up through the power
elite and capture a powerful heart. Will you sleep
your way to the top? There are worse ways of get,
ting what you want. Career:
This may be a good time
to take some time off. Escape to a relaxing and non,
stressful place.
Capricorn
(Dec.23-Jan.20)
Sex:Spice up your home life with creative touches.
There is nothing more creative than using your body
as a dining room table. Where, or who, is dessert!
Career:Get your opinions out to the powers that be
and see how you can become the advisor to the cor·
porate stars.
Leo(July24-Aug.23)
Aquarius
(Jan.21-Feb.19)
Sex:Whisper sweet nothings in her ear. It willbe
cheaper than buying her expensive somethings.
Career:Aqueerians find ways to make much more
money this March. But how much time will that
take? Put it to work for you, rather than viceversa.I
zone, you can expect to be swept off your feet by a gor,
geous stranger. Wear comfortable shoes. Career:
Let
others fund your professional ascent this March. Seek
a well,endowed benefactress to help you grease your
corporate cog.
Virgo(Aug.24-Sept.23)
Sex:You are especially sexy and alluring now. Hurry
and strut your stuff on the catwalk before it goes on
Icurve
Libra(Sept 24-0cl 23)
Sex:1 lake sure that you have a meeting of the minds
in your relationship. Otherwise, you willhavehalfa
mind to make major changes. Career:
You are espe•
Taurus(April21-May21)
Sex:A love missive may miss its mark and wind up
in the wrong hands. Maybe that's a good thing. It will
keep her guessing-and intrigued. Career:
Gal pals
will help you out of a job jam. However, nothing beats
'fessing up and asking for forgiveness. Whisper, so the
boss can't hear.
Sex:If you explore the world beyond your comfort
1s
sale-deeply discoumed. Career.
Panners willbethe
best advisors for an •job,related issue chisMarch.Or
maybe they would prefer that you retire and just do
the laundry.
AstrologerCh,1rleneLichtensteinis the author
of Herscopes: A Guide to Astrology for
Lesbians. Get more at thestarryeyc.com
or go
to her blogat thestarryeye.typepad.com.
SCENE
•
ABOUT
G~ND~
1 AtAtlantaQueerLiterary
Fest(fromleft):authors
Theresa
Davis,Daphne
Gottlieb,
Blairandthehostof
Cliterati,
KarenGarrabrant,
at
CharisBooks2 Partygoers
at
HereLounge's
SheWired
bash
inWeHo3 Prop8 protestin
Minneapolis
4 AuthorEllen
HartandRutaSkujins,
owner
ofTrueColorsin Minneapolis
5 Jill Bennett,
CathyDeBuono
& fansat SheWired
bash6
Margaret
Choat a California
NoonProp8 rally
h.
e,
rk
c!
r-
s.
I
ADVICELipstick & Dipstick
Finicky Eateror Control Freak?
Dear Lipstick and Dipstick: What is with lesbians who have special dietary needs-and
put all their less evolved,meat eating,chocoholic, wheat bread and whole milk-loving
friends through hell over it? Casein point: I
went out with my special-needs-dietfriend
to listen to music. She wanted to eat out, but
I told her I had alreadyeatenand was just interested in the music and hang-outfactor. I'd
beenthrough this food thing once beforewith
her and didn't want to deal with it again.She
arrived late, hadn't eaten,got bored immediately and expectedmeto go out to dinnerwith
her.Accommodatingly,I said, "Whereshall we
go, becauseI can find somethingto eat anywhere?" This decisiontook 45 minuteswith a
lot of, "Let's just go to your favoriteplaceand I
won't eat becauseI usuallyjust cookat home."
Whatthe fuck? Whycan't lezziesjust sink their
teeth into a nicejuicy hotdog?- FedUpWith
the FinickyFemales
co
br
ge
ad
Di
ti
Wa
r
Lipstick:Oh, I can-and do-love me some
beef! I don't get it either, Fed Up. I feel
your pain, as I, too, get peeved when someone can't make a decision or always lets me
decide on things. Regarding the food issues,
however, I think what's going on with your
friend has little to do with what she does
or doesn't eat. Instead, she's struggling with
something beneath the surface. Does your
friend really know who she is? Is she often
closed-minded? Does she exercise compulsively? Regardless of where her issues stem
from, it's your choice to be in this friendship,
and if she really drives you that crazy, why
do you spend time with her?
What is with lesbians
who have special dietary
needs-and put all their
less evolved, meat eating,
chocoholic, wheat bread
and whole milk-loving
friends through hell over it?
20
I curve
Dipstick:Lipstick, you are so intolerant of
those with special food needs. How many
times do I have to tell you that I'm a vegetarian before you stop suggesting barbeque? Fed,
the issue here is not what your friend does or
does not eat, but how she uses it to manipulate you-and how you're letting yourself be
manipulated. People like her will use many
excuses to get their way: supposed phobias,
illnesses, a dislike of Brad Pitt films. They are
no fun to be around and think they're better
than you. I would never leave good music to
go watch a friend not eat. Stand up for yourself and your friend's bland diet will stop eating at you.
DearLipstickand Dipstick:I havea verypersonalquestionto ask.I'm 39 andI'vebeenout
sinceI was 15. I cantalk to anyone,makejust
aboutanyonelaughand feel at ease.I have
beentoldI am charming,
cute,confident,
adorableandverysmart.I amnotunattractive
orliving in an alternatereality. My problemis thatI
am very sexuallyinsecure.I want nothingmore
than to meet women and have very passionate sex. It's not an issue of not knowingwhat
tH
a
is
a
y
n
Y
o
a
S
L
to do and nothingreallyoffendsme sexually.
Youknowhowmostpeoplecansay,"Thebest
sexI haveeverhadwas..."? Well,I don'thave
that story.I haven'tbeensexuallymolested
or
beenin an abusiverelationship.
I havesimply
left relationships
feelinglike I did not satisfy
mypartner.Thishasalwaysbeenan issue,but
it's actuallygettingworse.At thispoint,I can't
comfortably
kiss anotherwomanwithoutmy
brainsaying,"Youareterribleat thisandsheis
gettingnothingoutof whatyouaredoing."
Any
advice?
- Stuckin LousyLoverland
f
Dipstick:Lipstick is the queen of affirmations, so she'll tell you to look in a mirror
and repeat to yourself over and over that
you're a good kisser. Me, I'll tell you that
you're looking at it all wrong. If you've had
sex, then certainly one of those times was
"the best:' Porno movies aren't real. Neither
are those stories your friends are telling you.
Our culture puts so much pressure on us to
have amazing sex. Just today, in my inbox I
have an invitation to have sex with a pretty
Russian girl, products to make sex with my
wife really amazing and seven ways to grow a
really big cock. Would there be a market for
these products if everyone really were having
amazing sex all the timer The real problem
is, you're spending so much time worrying
about yourself and your performance that
you're not paying attention to your partner's erotic call-and-response. The next time
you're making it with a girl, turn your mind
off and close your eyes. Take in her essence
and follow her energy, her lips, her sighs.
Shakira says it best: "Hips don't lie:'
Lipstick:Lezzie up! Instead of repeating
affirmations, why not kiss yourself out of
this rut? Go to the girl bar on Saturday, hop
on the dance floor and make out with as
many women as you can. A word of warning: Watch out, dykes can be territorial and
this may spark a girl fight if you're not careful (work your magic in dark corners). You
need to get your chops back, Lousy Lover,
so start by mounting that horse and riding it
like you've never ridden it before. Relax and
let your body lead you. Nervous Nellys make
for clumsy lovers. Breathe in, breathe out,
believe in your powerful libido and you and
your lover will both go places you've never
been before.
WHATISTHENO.1 REASON
LESBIAN
COUPLES
STOPHAVING
SEX?
Fallingoutof love
48%
add-breaking hearts in between. My advice
on this situation is standard: Respect the thin
line between friend and lover and never shack
up with your ex. Pack up your stuff, BOBFF,
and hit the road.
OPP(otherpeople'spussy)
Dipstick:Oh, Bummed Out, have I been
in your shoes! I once dated a sweet softball
AmericanIdol (orthe TV remote)
player named Rhonda and after the season
18%
was over, I broke up with her to fool around
with Patty the Paramedic. The thing with
Obsessive
fantasies
aboutLindsayLohan
Patty never went anywhere, of course, and
a few months later I saw Rhonda out at the
11%
bar dancing and drinking with a new flame.
Thehighcostof batteries
Instantly, I decided that Rhonda was the one
7%
for me and I would do anything to win her
Carpalcoochiesyndrome
back. So, of course, I did. And a few months
(aka Internetaddiction)
after that, I remembered all the reasons I'd
3%
broken up with Rhonda in the first place. So,
take a good long look at the relationship and
According
to a Lipstick& Dipstickblogpoll
think about the reason you two stopped being
lovers and became friends. And while you're
DearLipstick
andDipstick:
Mybestfriend,who's at it, go have a meaningless fling to take your
an ex-lover,and I just graduated
fromcollege mind off what's going on behind closed doors.
andhavebeenlivingtogetherfor the pastfive
years.Untilrecently,neitheroneof us hadany DearLipstickand Dipstick:My partnerand I
for 18
seriousrelationships
sincewe'dbeenwitheach havebeenin a committedrelationship
other.She'shada newgirlfriend
fora littleover years.I want somethingnew. The same ol'
sameol' is reallylameat thispoint- Asleep
a month.
As muchas I wantto be happyfor my best at the Wheel
friend,I find it very hard to hear abouther
relationship.
I alsodon'tliketo bearoundthem Lipstick:Stop the insanity, people! If you're
whentheyare togetherbecauseI don'tliketo unhappy, do something about it. When you
see them holdinghandsor kissing.It makes have a dream, make a plan and take the steps
me feel sad insideandweird.I alsodon'tlike to get there. Hate your lifer Get a new one.
it whenhergirlfriend
spendsthenightbecause Stuck in a loveless or sexless relationship?
all theydo is stayin herroomandit makesme Get into therapy to fix it or stop the bleeding.
uncomfortable.
I neverusedto feel this way Asleep at the Wheel, 18 years is a long time to
abouther.NowI feelas thoughI wantto bethe be passively resigned to complacency, so I bet
oneholdingherhand.DoI stillhavefeelingsfor you've been driving blind for years. Take conher,butjustneverrealizedit untilnow?Oram I trol of your life and start living the one you've
justfeelingthisway becauseit is an awkward imagined today. No more excuses.
situation?
ShouldI tell her aboutmy feelings?
Dipstick:Lipstick, chill out. She's just ask- BummedOutBFF
ing for sex advice. Visit Goodvibrations.com
Lipstick:You know that saying "Keep your
and pick out a few new toys, a sex book and a
friends close and your enemies closer" 2 Well, video or two. That should help get you out of
you should never substitute ex-girlfriends
your pothole. ■
for enemies. This is a dangerous trap, ladies,
and it's the reason many dykes end up in the
Is texting cheating? How
vicious ex-lover labia loop, where they're in
do you come out to a
and out of the same dead-end relationship for
Bible thumper? Watch
years, and why it can take a decade to break
new episodes of The
up a three-month fling, all the while- I might
Lipstick& DipstickShowat curvemag.com.
33%
March 2009 \ 21
ADVICERelationships
Rockthe Boat, Baby
Surviving a lesbian cruise with your girlfriend. By Kate Lacey
Just to be fair, not everyone who goes on a
lesbian cruise is crossing the gangplank to
find a vacation fling. While setting sail on
the ship of drools promises all the wanton
sex and booze of Dinah Shore Week, minus
the pesky golfing, many couples take these
cruises with romantic intentions that sometimes actually involve each other. In theory,
vacationing is supposed to be a stress-free
activity, but in reality, being away from home
and dependent on someone else's company
for a few days can actually promote arguments. Follow these dos and don'ts and try
not to end up walking the plank.
Dotaketimeto doyourownthing.Too much
togetherness can be bad. Remember, if you
are joined at the hip and one of you goes
overboard, you both go. Take a Zumba class
while she learns what the heck shuffleboard
is. The independent activities you sign up for,
however, should not include the words "singles;' "wet T-shirt;' "hot, hot, hot" or "what
happens on C-deck stays on C-deck:'
Do not fall intothe temptationof flirtingwith
otherwomen.Especially if you know this is
something that makes your lover crazy. If
you have a wandering eye then avoid drinking too much-being inhibited may be the
only thing keeping you afloat. Getting drunk
in the nightclub and hanging all over cute
girls is a good way to turn your pleasure boat
into the Titanic. You haven't seen an iceberg
until you have spent hours out in the cold
hallway pleading with your partner through
a locked stateroom door.
Doallowyourselves
to meetnewpeople.Even
on a romantic getaway cruise, no couple is
an island. There's no need to fear the company of others. Not everyone is trying to
cruise your girlfriend. Talk to the people
you are seated next to at dinner. Try doing
some group activities that do not involve
body shots or stripper poles. Try talking to
the Lindsay Lohan-esque part-time lesbian
or the baby dyke with more piercings than a
sieve-just to broaden your horizons.
Do not fall into the food pit. Beware of the
way food on a cruise ship can be shoveled
down your throat in a culinary orgy. When
your girl suggests going whale watching, she
probably does not mean watching you graze
at the buffet for five days and four nights.
Do be preparedfor seasickness.
Bring your
own remedies or over-the-counter medication and nurse yourself and each other those
first few hours until you get your sea legs.
This is much better than being confined to
your cabin for two days because the infirmary is afraid that you are a walking petri
dish of disease.
0
a1
ca
m
le
cl~
dif
as
w
Ij
Donotfall intothe moneytrap.Money can be ha
a key catalyst for arguments between couples th
on a cruise. There are plenty of free activi- in
ties you can take advantage of on the ship in
order to save money. Sunsets and sunrises
are free. Using the phone to call the kennel
to check on the dogs is very, very expensive.
On many ships, there are free programs,
concerts, seminars and gym equipment for
your use. Cheesy souvenirs, T-shirts and
overpriced jewelry should be avoided.
Do use yourmoneyto get off the boatfor a
day trip. It's worth the extra expense to get
a change of scenery and check out the local
color. You'll appreciate this time together
much more than you would sitting in front
of the slot machines, mindlessly pushing
buttons, because eventually you'll push each
other's buttons.
g
Y
w,
Do makeuse of the conciergeandthe social n
n
director.They can help plan your trip and
g
provide little romantic surprises for your
girl, like private dinners, flowers, moonlight
walks-even having the band play her favorite song. And they can help you pick appropriate excursions and make reservations at each
stop. The little details will go a long way
toward making her remember why she is
with you in the first place.
A cruise is an excellent way to immerse
yourselves in the excitement and buzz of a
social group because there is always a party
going on and you are always invited. But the
ship also gives you the opportunity to insulate yourselves, to hide away in your cabin or
find remote areas of the ship where romance
a
can go full steam ahead. ■
22
Icurve
Ask Fairy Butch ADVICE
Lookin' for Love
r
e
DearFairyButch:I am writing becauseI have
a problemtrusting and allowing someoneto
careaboutme.I don't know if I havea sign on
my backthat saysI only needpart-timeloveor
leftover pity-I'm not sure. I don't do bars or
clubs,and beinga shy personhas madeit very
difficult for me to approachsomeoneto just
ask for a date or coffee. I don't want to deal
with gamesor dramaor headachesof any kind.
I just needsomeonewho's willing to meet me
halfway.Whereareall thoseeligiblewomenout
therelookingfor a real relationship?- Lonely
in Louisville
DearLonely:As for meeting potential part,
ners, darlin: I'll tell you exactly where you
can find them: the Internet! There are tons
of dating sites that cater to dykes, and dyke sec,
tions within mainstream sites. So many people
have met their sweeties on the Internet
that getting together with folks you've met
online has simply become par for the course.
Try gayoptions.com and lesbiandating.com
for specifically lesbian sites, and butch,
femmedating.com, if you're into that scene.
Remember to use common sense when dat,
ing online. Meet in a public place and don't
give out your home address before you feel
you can really trust your date.
As for your relationship issues, hon, you
won't find answers just by seeing a new part,
ner or changing your dating venue. You may
have been hurt in the past, but if you're truly
going to ready yourself for romance, then
the time has come to move on. Take les,
sons from your past experiences, but don't
dwell on the negativity you may have found
there. It's a new era for you, Lonely, one in
which you'll need to focus on making your,
self as fulfilled and actualized as you can
be. And, if you feel as though you're always
the one giving and never receiving in return,
you can find support at organizations like
Codependents Anonymous or in books like
Codependent No More, by Melody Beattie.
verballyabusive
to mein thepast.Sinceshehas
startedmedication,
sheisa completely
different
person.Shestoppeddrinking,stoppedabusing
me, evenstoppedchewingtobaccobecauseI
can'tstandit! But I don'tknowif I cancontinue
this relationship
becauseI cannotforgetwhat
shedid.
Shewentto jail twicefor whathappened.
I
don'tthinkshewouldeverhitmeagain,butonly
becausewherewe live,there'sa third strike
andyou'reoutpolicy.Shewouldautomatically
get sixmonthsin prison.So,it isn'tenoughfor
methatsheis onlybeing"good"so shewon't
goto prison.
AmI beingunfair?I justcan'tseem
to rekindlewhatwe had.MostofthetimeI look
at heranddon'tfeelanything.
- Confused
and
Coldin Colorado
DearConfused:
Honey, you tell me. You are
the person who chose to continue this rela,
tionship, even while she was being so terribly
abusive to you. You are the one who decided
to stick with it, even while she was acting like
anything but a loving partner. You are the one
who devalued yourself by staying in this rela,
tionship when you needed to get the hell out.
Do you want to know why I'm being so
uncharacteristically tough with you? Because
I've been there and I don't want you to spend
one more minute in that warped reality. A
lifetime ago, I spent two years with a woman
who'd tear me up at night and then tape an
apology in the same doorway each morn,
ing after. I stayed with her because I didn't
know what to do. I was living in a small
Midwestern town in the mid '80s, and had
access to virtually no resources. Allow me to
offer you some: Debra Strang's suitelOl.com
articles, Abuse in Lesbian Relationships, by
Kali Munro and No More Secrets: Violence in
Lesbian Relationships, by Janice Ristock. Then
get yourself to the local domestic violence
shelter and tell them your story. ■
Fairy Butch is the author of The
Ultimate Guide to Strap,On Sex:
DearFairyButch:I havebeenwith my partner A Complete Resource for Women
for a longtime-we hada weddingceremony and Men. EmailJb@fairybutch.com
andeverything.
Butshehasbeenphysically
and with your queries.
The
Ult1Hte
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to
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Book Online: DAMRONVACATIONS COM
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ADVICEHealth
Lesbian Health Throu h the A es
Our quick-reference chart will help you to stay healthy at any age. By Victoria A. Brownworth
The news is rife lately with tales of people living into their 90s and
beyond. There are over 84,000 centenarians in the United States
today. ot everyone wants to live to be 100, but, regardless oflongev~
ity, we all want to live out our lives as fully and healthily as possible.
Throughout our adult lives, women go through more health changes
than men, due to menstruation, childbirth and menopause. Women
can avert most potential health crises with preventive measures. Most
others are ameliorated by early treatment. Knowing your body and t]
recognizing any changes are essential. At each decade of our adult
lives, lesbians need to be concerned about specific healthcare issues.
The following guidelines are ones we should all follow to live the t]
healthiest and longest lives we can, whether we reach 100 or not.
Os
Os
Mostwomenin their 20s presumethat
becausetheir healthis goodthey don't
needregularphysicalexams.But it's in
your 20sthat youmostneedto establish
regimensto preventserioushealthissues
in the future.Thereis nothingbetterfor
youroverallhealthat anyagethan quiting
smoking,drinkingin moderation,maintaininga moderateweightlevel,exercising
at leastthreetimesa week,walkingdaily,
alwayswearingsunscreenandtaking a
calciumsupplementeveryday.
Byage35 yourestrogenlevelswill start to
decrease,whichcan leadto fibroidtumors
in the uterus,osteopeniaandosteoporosis. Yourmetabolismalsoslows,so it is
harderto loseweightandeasierto gain
it. Everywomanshouldhavea baseline
mammogramby age35. It's alsorecommendedthat womenhavea baseline
DEXAscan,or bone-densitytest, as well.
Youshouldget testedfor thyroiddisease
by age35-it's increasinglycommonin
women,particularlyin thosewho smoke.
Breast,heart,boneandcolonhealthare
the bigfour in your40sand50s.Regular
mammograms
arevital. Everywoman
shouldhavea colonoscopy
byage50and
annualbonedensitytestsfromthenon.
A full cardiacwork-up,includinganEKG
anda stresstest is, recommended
for
women40 andover.Estrogenprotects
ourheartsandbones,andas menopause
nears,estrogenlevelsdropprecipitously.
Ovarian,uterineandendometrial
cancers
aremostcommonin womenover40.
t]
At this age,youneedto be cognizant
of yoursexualhealthandtake precautions to maintainit. Sexualhealthand
overallhealthare inextricablylinked,and
someSTDscan be fatal, so get checked
regularly.Thehumanpapalomavirus,
chlamydiaand herpesare mostcommonamongyoungwomen.In additionto
practicingsafesexandhavingregular
PAPtests, youshouldlearnhowto do
breastself-examinations.
Manywomenin
their 20s and30s havefibroadenomas,
or
benigncysts,in their breasts.Getto know
your breastsandwhat theyfeel like and
you'll knowif somethingchanges.
If youareconsideringchildbirth,you
shouldget a thoroughgynecological
exam,
includinga fertility test. Manywomenwho
havechlamydiaareunawareof it, although
it's a leadingcauseof infertility.If youare
overweightor haveirregularperiods,your
chancesof gettingpregnantdiminish.
Youshouldavoidcaffeine,high-fatfoods,
smoking,alcoholanddrugsif youwant
to havea healthybaby.A gooddiet and
regularexercisehavebeenprovento aid
in conception.Besureto considerall the
ramificationsof yourchoiceto havea child
andmakesureyou'reawareof all your
optionsfor conception.
Mostwomengo into activemenopausein their late 40s or early50s.
If your periodceasesor becomes
irregular,or you havebleedingwhen
it is not time for your period,havea
gynecologicalcheck-up.Yourdoctor
candeterminewhetherfurthertesting
is necessaryto checkfor ovarianor
uterinecysts or changesin the uterine
wall. Perimenopause
and menopause
can bringon severemoodswings.
Insomnia,boutsof crying,hypersensitivity, irritability, decreasedlibido,
memorylossanddepressionareall
"normal" responses.
Womenin their 20sare oftencomingto
termswith their true sexualidentityand
comingout to friendsandfamily.This
can causea myriadof stressesandeven
rifts with familyandfriends.Also,women
with seriousmentalillnesseslike bipolar
disorder,or who haveaddictionissues,
are often diagnosedin their 20s. It's very
importantto havinga supportnetworkto
helpyouavoiddepressionandmanagethe
life changesyougo through.
Manywomenhaverelationshipdifficulties
in their 30s,whichcan bringon depression.Pursuingnonromanticfriendships,
seekingsupportgroupsandgetting
therapywhenneededare integralto
maintainingmentalstabilityandhealth
after a breakup.If youare in an abusive
relationship,seekhelp.Reportedincidents
of domesticviolencebetweenlesbians
haverisenin recentyears.Violenceis
neveracceptable.
Osand up
·•
24
I curve
··························•·······························
Whilemenopauseis a normalfact
of everywoman'slife, everybody
and mindrespondsdifferentlyto the
hormonaldisruption,andsomewomen
can haveseriousmentalandphysical
healthissuesas a result. Everywoman
over40 shouldsee her gynecologistor
physicianto discusshowto approach
menopausalchanges-physical and
mental-and to see if changesin diet
or medicationare required.
Money ADVICE
Five Ways to Protect Your Cash
Yourprimarycarephysician(PCP)or
physician'sassistantshouldgiveyoua
physicaloncea year.Thefollowingtests
shouldbe included:
With the economy in turmoil, it's easy to feel scared about your financial future, so we enlisted
the help of lesbian financial guru Rachel Robasciotti and her associate Maya Philipson to give
you some insider tips on how to fight the fear and take control of your finances.
Trustyourjudgment.
"One of the great things
about our lesbian clients, and women in
general;' says Robasciotti, "is that we don't
generally invest in things that we don't
understand. And a lot of the recent financial
meltdown has had its core in people investing in things that they did not understand:'
Philipson agrees: "If any of your readers are
worried that they don't know enough about
investments, or they're worried about investing, tell them we think that they can absolutely learn and that they'll be better at it
than the men:• [RachelLastra]
Bloodglucosecheck:Thistest screens
for diabetesor hypoglycemia.
Bloodpressurecheck:Thisbasictest
shouldbe doneeveryvisit.
Breastexam:An annualmanualexam
by yourPCPis an essentialscreeningfor
breastcancer.
~
Completebloodcount{CBC):
Thistest
screensfor anemiaandmeasuresblood
componentslike thyroid,liverandkidneyvalues,as well as cholesterollevels.
PAPsmear:Usuallypartof an annual
pelvicexam,this canbedonebyyourPCP.
Skincancercheck:Thisvisualinspection of yourentirebodyshouldbe done
everythreeyears-more frequentlyif
youhavea familyhistoryof skin cancer
or manymoles.
~
TBtest:Thistest for exposureto tuberculosisshouldbe doneeveryyearfor
peopleat highrisk, or as suggestedby
yourdoctor.
~
Urinalysis:
Screensfor urinarytract
infectionsandkidneydisorders,in addition to otherdiseases,suchas diabetes.
~
Eyeexamandglaucomatest:
Glaucoma
is a leadingcauseof blindness.
Talk to
Your
Doctor
lesbiansdid not "come out"
51% toof their
doctor,though...
910/70
0/
32 70
believedthat it was important
that their doctor knew their
sexualorientation.
of physiciansaskedtheir
patientsaboutsexual
orientation.
Source:Societyof Obstetricians
andGynaecologists
of Canada
Takea breath."Don't panic;' says Robasciotti.
"Don't sell out of your investments and put
the money in cash or under your mattress,
because you'll lock in all your losses:'
Watchyour wallet."The easiest way to live
off of less;' says Philipson, "is to have a lot
of play in your spending, a lot of flexibility.
And you get some of that flexibility by keeping those fixed expenses low. It's a bad time
to take on a new mortgage or a new car payment, or to decide you want premium cable,
because those are things that come out of
your monthly expenses:'
Demolishdebt."One of the most important
things to realize is that if you are in the
process of taking on debt, that debt is busy
growing in the same way investments would
be busy growing, only it's not in your favor.
If you can get yourself in a position where
you are not taking on debt, you're doing a lot
for your retirement;' advises Robasciotti. "It
doesn't matter if you've accumulated a million dollars at retirement, if you also have a
million dollars of debt to pay off'
Makethetoughchoices.
"I would also recommend that people challenge the assumptions
about what they believe it costs for them to
live. If you can reduce some expenses, you'll
create more money to pay off debt and save
for retirement;' says Robasciotti.
X Marksthe Spot
With Molly Ringwald back
in Hollywood, it's prime
time for Gen X to finally get
a little attention. Lisa Chamberlain's
Slackonomics: Generation X in the Age
of Creative Destruction shows why Gen
Xers are ready to take the reins from Baby
Boomers-not a moment too soon-while
Jeff Gardinar's X Saves the World shows
how the generation of riot grrrls, Alex P.
Keaton and Sassy magazine got the shaft
but might still save the world. Some stats:
~~~
of the workforce
are Gen Xers. 1
cB@~
of the workforce are
Baby Boomers. 1
cB7?~
of Gen Xers say
they'd "happily" stay
with their present
employers for the
rest of their careers. 2
Gen X employees work more paid and
unpaid hours than their same-age counterparts did in the 1970s; Baby Boomers and
Generation Yers work significantly less.3
2
Sources:'NewStrategistPublications,
Catalyst,3FamiliesandWorkInstitute
DYKE
DRAMA
FallingOut of Love
What to do when you just can't do it anymore. By Michele Fisher
She puts her hand on yours as you are driv,
ing and your first impulse is to shake it off
as if it were a tarantula. The sound of her
voice makes you want to jump out the near,
est window. Headache, diarrhea, cramps,
Ebola-what will your excuse be tonight for
avoiding intimacy with her?
So, you went and fell out of love. Damn.
Now what are you supposed to do?
The good news is that you didn't really
fall out of love. Most likely, you were never
in love in the first place. Lust, attraction,
intrigue-these
are the fool's gold of love,
26 j
curve
and often you only know it ain't the real thing
when the tinsel starts to wear off. Falling out
of love is rare, but falling out of like or lust is
the fuel that drives the dyke drama engine.
The problem is that you have already told
her that you love her, and now you want to
hop into a time machine, yank the lever and
get that moment back. Maybe you could stay
in there a few seconds longer, so that you two
would never meet. Who cares if the entire
world is thrown into chaos because of your
meddling-at
least you wouldn't be in this
mess.
can
the
and
SOO
lov
rel
You could just look her in the eye and tell yo
her that you have lost that lovin' feeling. But WO
you are not going to do that ... at least not for
a while. First, you will need to go through the lice
denial phase. You will blame your feelingson m
your menstrual cycle, your stressful job 01
the television depictions of lesbian life that
make you feel inadequate. Every relationshif tha
has its ups and downs-you
two just neec ret
(insert almost anything here]. (The deniai to
phase lasts from one week to a lifetime.)
pa
We take refuge in our forests of deniai ym
because we don't like breaking promises. it.
Truth, justice and the lesbian way is what w
we are all about. Telling somebody you love ou
them is kind of like a promise. A promise an
lasts forever. You can't tell a woman you're no
longer in love with her. That would be like
saying that your word is just no good. Thar
you are flaky and unreliable. That you are unstable. You are just not that kind of person,
so there must be some other explanation for
your negative feelings about her.
So, rather than admit your mistake, you
waste years pretending that you are in love.
Well, at least you don't look flaky.
You could try going to therapy. Throw
some money at the problem. When you
finally leave her, it will look like you tried
everything. Besides, therapy is a great way
to figure out why this is her fault, too.
You have got to lighten that backpack full
of guilt; it is weighing you down, sister.
Body,image problems, conflicting life goals,
substance abuse, self,esteem
good therapist can find all kinds of things
to take the heat off you in this situation.
Another benefit of therapy is that your
unsuspecting partner will be dragged into
doubt and unhappiness with you. Why
should you be the only one in pain? Rip the
lid off her security and comfort and expose
her to the cold, hard reality of whatever
insight the therapist provides.
For me, nothing ends a relationship like
therapy. You may never really get to what it
is that's bugging you, but if you hang in there
long enough the relationship will end. If you
t
e
n
r
t
°F
d
t
e
e
can go more than once a week, do it. Sitting
there for hours dredging up bad memories
and resentments is bound to take its toll
sooner or later. If you are really lucky, your
lover will call it quits to the therapy and the
relationship all by hersel£ thereby absolving
you of all wrongdoing and guilt. That truly
would be a storybook ending.
Whether it's aided and abetted by a
licensed professional or fueled by alcoholinduced courage, the truth will emerge
eventually. Try as you might to make the
end as dignified and painless as possible,
that is not how it will be. Psychobabble and
retrenchment are no match for your need
to be free. Perhaps you will be at a dinner
party, surrounded by horrified friends, when
your demons will pay an unannounced visit. Or maybe she will ask you where you
want to honeymoon and you will blurt
out that you want to honeymoon with
another woman.
Actions speak louder than words, so some
girls find that having an affair is the best way
to show that you no longer care. Avoid the
entire topic of wanting out of the relationship by creating a new, more interesting discussion, like why you are screwing somebody
else. Making her hate you is way better than
seeing her cry over you.
Breakups are messy, but they are particularly messy when one party is keeping a
horrible secret. The only thing worse is not
keeping that secret. Just tell her that you have
thought about it and there is nothing you
can do to make this relationship work. Don't
tell her that you were never in love. I don't
care if it's the truth, that little nugget is just
for you. Honesty after the fact is just cruelty
dressed to the nines. Breaking her heart is
unavoidable, but making her think that her
entire past was a lie is just unnecessary.
When you tell her you want out, you are
going to feel like a heel and she is going to
feel hurt and rejected and maybe even mad.
Great. You cannot and should not attempt
to control that. (And don't bother trying to
own any sadness in this situation. It makes
you look like even more of a jerk.) This time
you are the villain-next
time you may be
the victim.
And maybe that is part of the problem. We
need more characters in Dykeland. It seems
the only parts we get to play are villains and
victims. How many women have we loved:'
How many have we dumped:' How many
have gotten rid of us:'
Everybody is looking for the same thing:
happiness. In our quest for what makes our
hearts smile, we make mistakes. We are not
evil or awful, we are just selfish and needy.
It is the human condition. It is how we survive. Yep, I had to get dumped a whole lot of
times to acquire the wisdom I have. Here's
hoping you never have to reach this level of
enlightenment. ■
POLITICS
Rememberthe Ladies
I
du
Sen
When will women achieve full equality in the United States? By Victoria A. Brownworth
A by-product of the Second \\Tave of feminism was establishing women's historywhat some of us called "herstory"-as
a
discipline char needed to be studied. \\'hat
were women's roles in che United Scates
and the world? In order to know what we
could accomplish in the future, we needed to
uncover che role models from our past. \Ve'd
all grown up hearing about the Founding
Fathers, bur what about the Founding
Mothers? V..1e needed women's \Vork to be
recognized, and if men were not going to do
it, we would have to do it ourselves.
In 1981, Congress passed a resolution
establishing 1 rational \\'omen's History
\\'eek. Ir \Vas in 1 larch, to coincide with
International \\'omen's Day on March 8.
In 19 7, Congress expanded che week to a
month. For the past 22 years, Congress has
issued a resolution for \\omen's History
onrh.
The president al o is ues an annual proclamation about \\ omens History
lonrh.
Last vear' proclamation b • George \ \.
Bush scared, "\\omens History. fonth provides our countr • che privilege of honoring
the countless contributions char American
women have made throughout our history:'
1 rot very inspired.
Despite the token month in their honor,
women have a long hi rory of being ignored
b • their government. Abigail Adams, the
wife of John Adams, the second president
of the nired Scares, was a tirele s ad\·ocare for womens rights. In a series of letters co her husband during the American
Revolution and his tenure as president,
he wrote compellingl ' of the need for
che government to recogni::e the importance of women in the evolving nation.
Her frustration with the econd-cla.ss earns
of women m the fledgling democracy led her
co write, "If particular care and attention is
not paid co the ladie , we are determined co
foment a rebellion, and will nor hold ourelves bound b ' an ' laws in \\ hich we have
no voice or repre entation."
If only women had taken her word co che
28
I curve
du
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gen
be
by
an
for
las
WO
rhe
bu
ing
pe
pa
ch
19
wr
wa
WO
lio
p
streets, as she warned they would, women
might not be languishing in the second-class
status-or
stasis-they
are in today. There
was no women's rebellion 200 years ago.
And while it can be argued chat women have
achieved significant advances since then,
they have yet to achieve full equality in the
C'niced States.
It rook women 174 years after Adams
wrote chose words to get the right to vote.
And it wasn't until 2008, more than 200
years later, chat a woman ran for president
on the ticket of a major parry and came close
to receiving the nomination.
Although Adams understood that women
had a struggle ahead of chem, in the revolutionary atmosphere of 18th-century America
she may have hoped that women would forge
ahead the ,vay che men had.
Bur \\ omen have had a difficult time
achieving any real power in American government. Instead of becoming president,
Clinton was appointed Secretary of Scaceonly che third woman to be appointed to
char post.
\\omens' ability to break chrough che glass
ceiling of American government has been
limited. There have been only 35 women in
the Senate since its establishment in 1789.
Out of 1,897 Americans who have served
in the Senate, less than 2 percent have been
female.
Today, only 16 of che 100 senators cur,
renrly serving are women, yet chat is still
more than ever before. Twelve of the wornen who have served were appointed, six
of whom were appointed to succeed their
w
la
to
w
P
deceased husbands.
Equality continues to elude women
in the government and because of the
e
government.
Today, the "gender gap in earnings"-as
it is called in the U.S. Census Report-is
s
25 percent. For every dollar a man makes,
a woman gets 76.5 cents. For every $100 c
dollars for a man, a woman makes only
$76.50; for every 10,000, only $7,650,
and so on.
This gap is stunning, and is made more
so by the fact char the Equal Pay Ace,
devised to eradicate wage discrimination, p
was passed in 1963.
0
In 2005, then-Senator
Clinton introduced the Paycheck Fairness Act in the
Senate and Rep. Rosa DeLauro introduced the same legislation in the House.
The PFA was written to amend the
gender gap in women's pay that had yet to
be addressed. The Act was reintroduced
by Clinton and DeLauro in 2006, 2007
and 2008.
According to the PFA, the average income
for a male over the age of 15 in 2006 ( the
last year data was available) was $48,768. For
women over the age of 15 in the same year,
the average income was only $31,402.
The House finally passed the PFA last July,
but it was held back in the Senate. Those voting against the Act argued it would unfairly
penalize employers who would be forced to
pay women comparably to men-something
they were supposed to have been doing since
1963.
After the House voted on the Act, DeLauro
wrote in a Huffington Post op-ed piece, "This
wage disparity between men and women costs
women anywhere from $400,000 to $2 million over a lifetime:'
It took women in Congress to bring the
PFA to the floor. Unfortunately, the govn ernment-still
a male bastion-is
no more
n responsive to women's rights now than it
was 200 years ago when Abigail Adams
d wrote to her husband, "Remember the
n ladies, and be more generous and favorable
to them than your ancestors:'
President Obama committed himself to
·11 women's issues during the election cam, paign and frequently referenced the achieve·x ments of Clinton, his closest Democratic
1r rival, and commended her as a role model
for his own daughters as well as for other
n young women.
But two centuries after Adams called for
equality for women, we have yet to achieve it.
s Clinton echoed Adams' exhortations when
she asserted, "There cannot be true democs, racy unless women's voices are heard. There
cannot be true democracy unless women are
given the opportunity to take responsibility
for their own lives. There cannot be true
democracy unless all citizens are able to pare ticipate fully in the lives of their country:'
This Women's History Month, with a new
, president and a new administration, it is time
once again to make our voices heard. ■
News Notes
growingon their Facebook
group,"Gay
womenget batteredat children'sschool."
GayMarriageDebateMovedto Iowa
In December
2008the IowaSupremeCourt
beganhearingargumentsfromsix gay
coupleschallengingthe state'sbanon
same-sexmarriage.Thecasehadbeen
makingits waythroughthe courtsystemfor
overthreeyearsbeforeit gotto the Supreme
Court,andit is estimatedthat the court
couldtakeup to a yearor moreto cometo
a decision.
Pro-GayMarriageChurchLeadersUnite
A groupof religiousleadersin Maine
haveformeda groupcalledthe Religious
Coalitionfor the Freedomto Marryin
Maineandare urgingMaine'sresidentsto
endmarriagediscriminationin the state.
Thecoalition,which includesmembers
of the UnitedMethodist,Episcopaland
Presbyterian
churches,heldpressconferencesthat coincidedwith
the beginningof marriages
for same-sexcouplesin
Connecticut.
Lesbianto LeadObama's
Environmental
Council
PresidentObamaselected
NancySutley(right)to chair
the WhiteHouseCouncil
on Environmental
Quality.
Sutleywasthe first prominentmemberof the LGBT
communityto be appointed
to a postin Obama'sadministration.She
hasa longrecordof workingon environmentalpolicyandpreviouslyservedas the
deputymayorfor energyandthe environmentin LosAngeles.
LesbianMomsAssaulted
Two lesbianswere attackedby another
parentoutsidetheir child'sschoolin
Oshawa,Ontario,in Canada.
Theman
hurledhomophobic
insultsat the pairand
physicallyassaultedthemin full viewof
childrenandotherparents.Theattacker
wasarrestedandchargedwith two counts
of assault.Thevictimsandtheir supporterscalledfor the attackerto becharged
with a hatecrimebut policefoundthat the
crime"did not meetthe narrow[definition]
of hatecrime."Supportfor the womenis
MinorityGroupsComeOutAgainstGay
MarriageBan
Severalcivil rightsgroupshaveaskedthe
CaliforniaSupremeCourtto annulthe ban
on gaymarriagethat passedin November
2008.Amongthesegroupsarethe NAACP
LegalDefenseandEducational
Fund,the
Mexican-American
LegalDefenseand
Educational
Fundandthe
AsianPacificAmericanLegal
Center.
Thegroupshave
arguedthat lettingstand
the ban(whichoverturneda
previousSupremeCourtdecisionallowinggaymarriage
rightsin the state)mayserve
to underminethe rightsof
racialminoritygroups.
CaliforniaAttorney
GeneralReversesPosition
on Proposition
8
AttorneyGeneralJerryBrownchangedhis
positionon California'ssame-sexmarriage
banandhasaskedthe StateSupremeCourt
to voidProposition
8. Afterthe measure
passedBrownsaidthat hewoulddefendit,
but hassincestatedthatthe banis unconstitutionalbecauseit deprivesa minorityof
a fundamentalright.
ActivistsUniteAgainstProp8
Folksaroundthe world demonstrated
againstthe passageof Prop8 in California.
Planningfor the protestswas startedby a
Seattleblogger,AmyBalliett,whosewebsite,jointheimpact.com,
allowedvolunteers
to postinformationaboutthe protests.
Protestswereattendedby hundredsof
thousandsof peoplein morethan300cities.
[RachelLastra]
March 2009
I 29
Depending on one's perspective, JT Leroythe abused transgender teen who turned truck
stop tricks before he became a celebrity cult
author-was either a tragic hoax that eroded
the public's faith in autobiographical tellalls or, as former New York Press editor John
Strausbaugh tells it, an "elaborate nom de
plume, sort of a 21st-century George Sand.
Here's this middle-aged woman who's not
getting anywhere as a writer. She reinvents
herself as a girly boy and becomes a huge success. On whom does that reflect more poorly,
her or all the rest of us?"
Author and designer Savannah Knoop,
whose sister-in-law Laura Albert penned the
Leroy books, doesn't have the answer. But the
woman who played the public face of Leroy at
readings, celebrity-studded parties (with folks
like Winona Ryder, Gus Van Sant and Dennis
Hopper), and even in the bedroom of actor
Asia Argento during their brief affair, certainly
understands America's obsession with
celebrity and realness.
Knoop, whose memoir, Girl
Boy Girl: How I Became
JT Leroy, talks to Diane
Anderson-Minshall about
being outed as JT, coming out as queer, exposing
herself to Carrie Fisher and
how playing the public face
of someone else's creation
changed her life forever.
30
I curve
Youwerelyingto peoplein yourdailylife. Didyouend uptellingthemor Ye
didtheydiscoverit in the New YorkTimes?
aro
JT
They discovered it like everybody else.
all
Whatwastheirreaction?
I think it was just utter surprise. It's so wacky and out of context to everyone's I d
daily life. I'm kind of amused [at] how many different layers there were to this I
story and how long it went on. Probably for my co-workers it explained a lot
because I'd been out so much.
Youwerelivingasthistransgender
personoutin the publiceye.Howmuch
didthat changewhoyouare?
I think I've always been interested in gender and, you know, exploring my
sexuality. Even in high school, I was interested in that. I was obsessed with
Orlandoin seventh grade. I've always kind of been interested in alter egosand
shape-shifting-you know, the balance of gender within one person. [Playing
JT] gave me a lot of insight into my own interests and I feel like I embrace
that more and more. That was one of the parts that I kind of took into my
own life.
Didit impactyourowngenderidentityor did it just allowyouto express
yourgender?
'J\.llowed to express" is a good way to say it. I kind of remember feeling distraught-at the beginning-that I could pass for a boy, because I wasn't chat
comfortable with that part of mysel£ That [part] had always been there but it
was just pointing it out more. Looking at a picture and having someone say,"Oh
diQ
in~
wi
wi
yeah, you look just like a boy"... and thinking,
"I do!" And then becoming more and more
comfortable with that. When you go too far
into it and you finally embrace something, you
embrace it all the way. It's definitely a part of
me, and it's not like I'm trying. It's just there,
so I might as well accept it.
sonal for them. There was a whole range of emotions
that people would project onto him-that they had
taken from the books and mixed with their personal
take us under her
experience.
Perhaps. I remember her taking a photo of me
and saying, "Oh God, you even kind of look
like him:' I don't know if you ever saw, on the
back ofJT's books, she had somebody playing
him. She had a portrait of this stranger and
she said, "Oh, you even kind of look like this
person:' We had kind of the same facial struc,
ture or something. I feel like I have a-I don't
know if it was the shyness, but she could see
that we had a crossover. I felt like I was a good
fit. I wanted to think I was. You know:'
ally strongly. I've never been homeless-that was the
part where I couldn't speak from experience. The
gender stuff I really connected to. Laura, whatever
she had been through there was something that was personal secret or
Therewere so manytoughissuesthat he con- wing and ... l felt
nectedwith readerson,fromsexabuseto homelike ... l have nothing
lessnessto gender.Didyoueverconnectwith the
to give you that's
Do youthink that LauraAlbertsaw some- workthat way?
thingin youwhensheaskedyouto be JT? I did connect to the books. I responded to them re,
Shetoldan interviewerthat youput on the
wig andthe glassesandwentoutthereand
it was like JT enteredyourbody.
I find that interesting. It took me a lot longer
to embrace that. Sometimes I feel like, "Oh, it's
just like a ghost story:' I was there the whole
time, it was like I was possessed. There was
some other energy to him and he had his own
presence and character.
channeling the emotional truth. JT was-it wasn't something."
being-I don't know. I felt like I connected to it
and universally people were connecting through
the theme between the mother and son. I wasn't always com,
fortable with that part of it. I think that comes across in the
book.
Do youthink Laurawas right in thinkingthat withoutthe
hoaxthisworkwouldn'thavegottentheattentionit did?
Her reason for doing it was very individual for her and I can
say that I think that she sincerely had all these different rea,
sons. And I guess that was one of them. I don't think that
she'd probably say it exactly like that.
Butreaderswere moreinterestedbecauseit was written
by somebody
who'dgonethroughthoseexperiences,
versussomemiddle-aged,
middle-class
woman.
I think that we're in a very strange place where really there is
Doyouevermissthat energyandcharacter this obsession with authenticity. You see it in reality shows
and there was the James Frey [controversy] that came out
that JT had?
Yeah. I've gone through feeling like he would never come
around again. There was such playfulness.
JT Leroywas an iconto transgender
individuals.
Afterthis
all happened,
whatwastheir response?
e's I don't know if I've really gotten the opportunity [to find out].
is I mean I have a lot of friends in the queer community who
or are transgender. They know about me being JT ... It's hard
to gauge it from my friends who didn't know about it before
h [they knew me] ...I've had some mixed response, but from the
transgender community ... ! think that they kind of under,
y stand it, all of the many layers of it.
h Whatdidyoulearnaboutfameandcelebrity?
d It was such a specific case, because I was approaching it from
g kind of a disconnected place. It wasn't my work that was out
e there. It was Laura's work, or JT's work, and I was there the
y whole time when I was playingJT, but there was a disconnect.
s
s-
at
it
h
So on one level I got to observe it and see how people treated
JT without being connected to it personally. I was struck
by how he was always saying how shy he was and how he
didn't want people to touch him. [But] he was constantly be,
ing touched. People wanted to connect. They had connected
with the book, they were his fans, so they wanted to connect
with him and find a personal connection, because it was per,
maybe two days after the JT unveiling. Like it's kind of this
social milieu that we're obsessed with in memoir. It seems like
it's happened kind of recently... but in the last 20 years the
media is constantly creating this simulacra or that it's our gov,
ernment right now. People really want to have something that
they can say,"I know this to be true:• And maybe it's like this
obsession within the media, it's like necessary in a culturallike a pop-things that are put out culturally.
Haveyoulearnedto liveasyourseH
nowthatyou'renotJT?
I don't know if we ever do. I had this identity crisis after it all
happened, and I'm really thankful that I wrote the book. I feel
that I wouldn't have been able to process it without [that]. I
needed to really sort out what had happened for mysel£ and
why I had done this, and why I allowed it to go on or what
my obsession with it was. That chapter of my life, I feel like
I've sorted a lot of it out. I'd be at a different place-really
confused-if I hadn't written it. I wonder if I'll ever come to
a point where I feel much more comfortable with mysel£ But
also I wonder if that's just like being in your early 20s and you
just keep evolving. I wonder if you ever get to that point where
you go, "I know me!"
Is it differentreadingas Savannah
versuswhenyou'dgoto
the readingsas JT andhideundertables?
March 2009 \ 31
It was different. I feel like there was so
much preparation for JT and there was
also so much to hide behind in that ...
Laura was constantly having relationships with people and then I'd meet
them. There was all of that to think
about, then there was all of the ques,
tions to think about, then there was the
wig to put on and the sunglasses, and
I would start working myself up into
this complete anxiety. I would physically get so nervous that my muscles
would be tired because I'd be shaking
so hard. I did a reading and I got up there
and I just started to cry at one point because I'd get myself so
worked up, which I found really shocking that I could do that.
It felt like-I don't know if you ever did this as a kid-but
you would hyperventilate and then pass out. I don't have that
[anymore). I recognize the nervousness and I try to move on
from it, which ultimately is probably a healthy thing.
He was relieved, right! There was a disconnect [because) ht
was talking to JT on the phone, too. So I think he was relieved, because it's finally like it made sense.
Didanyof thesepeopleseethroughto the realyou?
I don't know. It's such a weird circumstance, where you find
yourself through being somebody else. So it's not the most
direct way, I'll say that. But I guess to trust in yourself and follow your intuitions about what you feel that you need. That's
a good, hard question. ■
Youhada boyfriendin the bookand nowyouhavea girl•
friend.So,howdoyoudefineyourself?
As queer. It's interesting, the way that JT went through allthese
different things and I relate to his kind oflike,"Well, some dar
I'm this and some days I'm that and it's fine with me and i·
should be fine with you:' But I think, ultimately, I'm queer.
Canyoutell me a little bit aboutyourclothingline?
I started making clothes about five years ago, shortly after
started beingJT. I started out doing all one-of a-kind, reconstructed garments. Now I do patterns, so I make more thar
one. But it's still in really small batches ... so that it's individua
with you and your own style. I really feel like that's the cruxthat's the obsession with clothing. It's about individuality anc a
wearing things the way you want to. I hope that older ana
younger women can wear it. Women have their own prowess when they're wearing it, but it's not really sexy in a conventional way. It could be unisex, a lot of the stuff. I feellikf
Nowyoudon'thaveto cramfor a testbeforeyourreadings. there was a connection that I made from being JT ... Thar·
On one level that was really challenging but it was also kind
my obsession with clothing: that you can put clothes on anc c
of much easier. I had some place to retreat to. I can't be like, feel completely different and say something so different abour co
"Oh I didn't know [how to answer] that question:' This is my yoursel£ I'm excited ...[about my) new project. Right now tht
life. There's nothing to cram for, but there's also nothing to line is called Tine, so this is called the T ranc. This is a line ot Ar
hide behind.
padded undergarments that you wear and you can put it on ir
OnethingyouweremostafraidofwaslosingLaura.Doyou under a Tshirt but it will either have shoulder pads, like, big be
missthatfriendship?
shoulder pads, or a hunchback, or these different little lumps. n
Yeah, I feel like we went through this experience together and
Ir's pretty out there and wild. It's more like a wearable art projit was really intimate. She's told her side of the story. I thought
ect. It's exciting because it's encompassing so many of the dif- w
that the Paris Review article was really-they covered so much
ferent themes that I love but without the commercialism of ro
ground in it. And then also through her trial. I feel like it's so trying to make something that a boutique would buy.
weird for me to be talking about it. But she's not involved this
I feel for the peoplelike CarrieFisher,who was motherlyB
time. I wonder what will happen between us. At this point
towardyou.Howdidyoucopewith thosesituations?
p
we're not really talking. And I don't know, it's weird.
It was really hard. It was one of the hardest parts. I went "P.
Haveyouhadcontactwith any of the celebritiesthat you through it so many times: This is so weird I need to quit. Ir
hobnobbed
with?
was always that one [thing) that I couldn't get around. I really, D
I haven't had much contact with anybody from that world,
really admire Carrie Fisher. I admire her as an artist and I just h
which is another kind of interesting phenomenon. I think it's think she's a really strong, amazing person, and she did rake h
partly just that everyone was always contacting JT through
us in and take us under her wing and bought me cough syrup a
email and phone and that was all through Laura. So I've had
for my cough. You know, she was amazing. I felt like.. .I have o
very minimal contact with people. But I feel like the people
nothing to give you that's mine and so I kind of show her my
that I have come across and reconnected with-there's this
tits because it's like a personal secret or something. But she's c
connection there that I had been wondering about.
actually one of the only people that I tried to contact and I
You're really frank about your relationshipwith Asia went and saw her play and it was so great. We talked a little
Argento.It seemsas thoughyou'repondering
throughout bit. I think she understood that there were a lot of different s
the bookwhetheror notshereallyknowsyou.
layers to it. I don't want to put words in her mouth but I'm
Yeah, that was what was constantly going through my mind
glad that I went and saw her. I really admire her.
with everybody I ended up making a connection with. But Yourstoryis reallyabouta youngwomanfindingherseH.
especially her.
Is thereonelessonyou'dwantto passon ?
li
I have one friend that I made that I've kept. A guy named Ben
Foster who's an actor. It was really interesting to hear everything from his side, his perspective on it.
Benwas kindof relieved.
32
I curve
r
Di
ti<
A
ht
'SADDLEUP
rl-
ese
AN AFFORDABLE WEEK IN THE CALIFORNIA BACKCOUNTRY SHOWS
ONE COWGIRL HOW TO SWAGGER. BY MELISSA FONDAKOWSKI
y
WHEN I TOLD my friend I was going on a
horse drive through the California backcountry,
she said, "Oh, like BrokebackMountain!"
"Sure;' I replied, "but without the sheep and
the sordid love affair:' It would also be without the
knowledge that I could handle backcountry camping
and rough-terrain riding. To date, I'd only car-camped
nc and rode horses in a ring. But I wanted to be like Ennis, like
nc Jack: I didn't just want to finish the drive. I wanted to love it.
w
I mailed in my nonrefundable $980 trip fee way in advance,
n- so I couldn't back out. Of course, I spent the next three months
'ke practicing my cinch knots on leftover Christmas ribbon, pret. tending the arm of the sofa was a stirrup and mounting the
couch. I set up and repacked my tent 20 times, to be sure I
m could do it without looking stupid.
he
ot Arrival:In addition to many basic fears, I had one slightly
irrational one: that on a bathroom break I would be left
ig behind a 5-foot sagebrush wall, my bare bum in the air with
s. no paper to wipe, as the cowboys ushered the herd away.
~But there would be none of that. These backcountry trips,
if- which might be intimidating to some city slickers, aren't
of rough at all. At each camp, in addition to the chuck wagon,
the crew set up a four-stall lavatory, affectionately named the
ly Buck-a-Roo Loo, replete with biodegradable recycled toilet
paper, sinks and soap, which lent new meaning to the phrase
nt "pack it in, pack it out:'
on
Ir
ly, DayOne:Normally, I would have been insulted to be assigned a
sr horse named Wimpy, but we were about to release the anxious
e herd from its pasture and I was too excited to care. Mounting
a horse from the ground requires special skill and I noticed
others using anything they could find to get up: rocks, felled
trees-other people. With one swift push off the shoulder of a
cute cowpoke, I settled into the squeaky leather.
Wimpy, of course, was no such thing. She was a sure-footed
mare with a fast fifth gear. And after 18 grueling miles over
some of the dustiest terrain I'd ever had the displeasure of
inhaling, I was the one who was feeling wimpy. We arrived at
camp as the sun was setting, covered in dust and looking like
a bunch of tired criminals, masked in kerchiefs. If every day is
like this, I won't make it, I thought. I fell asleep-passed out,
d really-too tired to notice the blisters on my bum.
DayTwo:I felt them in the morning though. Luckily, in addition to hearty meals the chuck wagon offered brilliant first aid.
After some diaper-rash cream and Band Aids, I was ready to
get back on my horse. All I could think about on the second
day was the promise of our next camp at Crowley Lake-a hot
spring. Unfortunately, in the high desert in June, hot springs
are still cold-barely 50 degrees. I plunged in anyway. By now,
the dust was thick, as even as a fake tan, and my desire to wash
it off far outweighed the shock of the cold.
DayThree:After miles of driving the herd over flat, fresh pastures
we camped at a cattle ranch. We gorged on steak, beans and
cornbread and talked about the freedom of galloping through
the wide-open space. I finally started to feel an easiness in my
body, a pride: the slow,sure swagger of any unhurried cowgirl.
DayFour:On our last night in the woods, we camped in a cattle
bone yard and celebrated ourselves around a blazing campfire.
We'd made it to the final leg of the trip safely.The sky was so
clear I could see every star. The cry of coyotes edging toward
the decaying carcasses in the bone yard crept ever closer. But I
slept unafraid, more peacefully than I had in a while. Every fear
I'd had about the trip and my own abilities had disappeared.
DayFive:Packing up camp seemed to take an extra long time. I
don't think any of us were ready to leave.A little mournfully, we
mounted our ponies for the last time and, single file, made our
way up the breathtaking and slightly scary trail along a ravine
to our supplier's base camp, Mammoth Lakes Pack Outfit.
After a final lunch we headed home. I looked at myself in
the rearview mirror. My skin was clear, my expression open
and confident. I was who I hoped I'd be-and then some. ■
alo
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N YOUR WAY to Cairns, Australia, start
in Sydney. Australia's most populous city is like London on
sunshine and happy pills. Run around the city-check out
the iconic Opera House, go to Bondi Beach, find a bar. Order
a local beer and drink with the Aussies-they are particularly
good at having fun. Make friends with locals or fellow travel,
ers; let them take you anywhere and ride it out for as long as
it lasts.
Next, rent a car and drive up the eastern coast to Byron Bay,
the mystical gateway to Cairns. This will take you two days.
Start early on the first day, and stop in the midafternoon. Find
accommodations anywhere near the beach. Spend the rest of
the afternoon at the ocean behaving like a child-the warm
water, the waves and the sun will induce a state of presentness
that may feel like a memory you've never had.
The next day, continue your drive to Byron Bay, the
once,secret hippie town. Byron Bay proper will be filled
with tourists, so stay at a bed,and,breakfast outside of town.
Cairns is still a ways away, but you will need the medicine
of this landscape, this crossroads where rolling green coun,
tryside meets the rainforest and the ocean. The next day, get
directions to a quiet beach. Go there and observe that you can
see no one for miles in each direction.
You can get to Brisbane in two hours. From there, take a
cheap, quick flight to Cairns. When you arrive in Cairns, stay
at any motel in town for the night. In the morning, take your
bags and wait for your ride into the rainforest. Yes, your ride.
Before you get to Cairns, find a good hostel to stay at, right
on the ocean, one that will pick you up and whisk you away
to your hideout in the jungle. Choose a company that offers
things to do-walks in the rainforest, night hikes, daylong
boat trips to the ree£ Here is your trip to Cairns.
Stay in the rainforest, because this is what Cairns has to
offer, because it still exists, because it bumps right up against
the ocean and because this part of the ocean is home to the
Great Barrier Ree£ The hostels are self contained and civi,
lized; there's food, and the Internet, and some even have pools
and private rooms with air conditioning. Stay in the rainforest
because you'll be checking your email at the outdoor cafe one
night and a giant butterfly-bigger than your hand-might
perch gently on top of your computer and check you out for
a minute.
Everything here is self sufficient and wild. The trees have
arms that can wrap themselves around other plants and con,
sume them. If you go off the beaten path, you can walk into
the forest, turn around twice and be instantly lost. You will
not be accustomed to the patterns here-the
colors, loops
and textures will draw you farther in. There are vines that
have teeth and will catch you if you brush up against them.
There are wild crocodiles. But this is why you're staying in the
safety of the hostel, with guided help.
Take the boat trip that the hostel offers. The smaller and
more modest the boat, the better. It takes roughly an hour
by boat to get to the Great Barrier Reef. You can't touch any,
thing on the ree£ but you can spend the afternoon snorkeling
and taking it all in-you will see the light aqua color of the
water against the eastern horizon, the ancient vibrant colors
of the coral and strange fish. You'll witness the perfectly white
sandbar in the middle of the ocean that only the sea birds
walk on. And you'll forget where you are-inside one of the
mysteries of the world, swimming along a reef so big that it
can be seen from outer space. If the captain offers a scuba
class for some extra dough, do it. They'll give you the gear and
an introductory dive class right there. Fifteen feet below the
surface, your instructor might suddenly pass you a giant sea
cucumber. Your hands will instantly, intuitively assess it and
gather information.
You'll thank yourself for choosing the smaller boat when
on the ride back to the shore the captain turns off the motor
and lets all 10 of you take turns jumping off the roof of the
boat and into the water in the late,afternoon sun. You won't
even be cold. You'll laugh with strangers, eat tuna sandwiches
and salty chips, hit land and go back to your room for a shower.
You'll get into bed and sleep very hard-and
finally you'll
dream your dreams in the belly of the rainforest, the world
reimagined inside of you. ■
ing
Thi
PARASAILING
ADVENTURES
Ba
un
of
AREA GREAT
WAYTO REALLY
SEEALL OF
A CITY.
0 THERE I WAS, sitting under a thatched beach
umbrella, reading a terrific book in what was, for
me, a rare state of total relaxation at the Hotel Villa
Mexicana on La Rapa Beach in Zihuatanejo, Mexico.
My girlfriend, Tracy, her parents and I were spending a few days there before heading to Troncones for
Tracy's sister's wedding. Sitting under that umbrella
was like starring in my own personal Corona commercial, though my beverage of choice was a wonderful Mexican
brew called Victoria. Occasionally, local merchants would
approach us selling jewelry, pottery and other assorted treasures. We allbought something-it was hard not to. The wares
were gorgeous and the locals were charming salespeople.
But then I saw something on the beach that really caught
my eye, and before I knew what was happening I was negotiating with two men who were offering to take me parasailing
in my rusty college Spanish. Parasailing? Had I gotten too
much sun? Normally, such a thing is the stuff of scary dreams,
not something I'd actually do voluntarily. But apparently, fate,
destiny or some other force of nature was calling the shots
that day. So I surrendered, spellbound under the Mexican
sky. The adventure would cost just $25. The experience was,
however, priceless.
After a brief safety tutorial, I was strapped into the harness
and told to hold on as the powerboat moored a few yards away
roared to life. I was airborne almost instantaneously. I kept
rising higher and higher. How high, I can't say for sure. But I
can tell you that I was just a speck in the sky in some of the
36
Icurve
photos Tracy snapped from the ground. Usually, I'm afraid 01
heights. But something came over me on that particular da)
in that particular moment, and I will never forget the feeling
I have never been more at peace in my entire life than when •
was soaring in that Zihuatanejo sky. I thought for sure I had
packed it, but apparently I had left fear back home.
The boat took me along the beach and around a bend
which afforded stunning views. On the way back, a bird, some
kind of gull, flew beneath me and left a wake of turbulence ir
up
sal
on
Cl
an
ins
R
th
an
a
OV
n
w
h
COi
its path. I've never seen anything like it or heard anything like
the whooshing sound it made some 15 feet below me. I could
fr
have stayed up there indefinitely. Two shrill whistle blows
however, soon cued me to prepare for landing. This experiat
ence was a touchstone for me in that I realized that I really
do have the capacity to be one with nature, to know absolute
peace and to live truly in the present tense.
dti
The rest of the trip was incredible. Highlights included
Sl
the lovely beachside wedding, the sound of the waves crashhe
ing at night, the local cuisine, shell-collecting treks, dreamlike sunsets and so much more. We even found a baby turtle
that had lost its way and returned it to the sea. It's the parasailing, though, that has its own private place in my memory._
[AimselL.Ponti]
N MY LAST YEAR of college, my roommate, Claire,
suggested we "go away" for spring break, like so many of
our private-school classmates often did.
"We need a break;' she said. Yes, we needed a
break. She knew some people, she said. Are we talking about a vacation or a mob hit?
"We only have to worry about paying for gas;' she said.
This was a lot less of a financial burden in the 1990s.
"So where are we going?" I asked.
"Florida;' she said.
I remember the drive well: alternating Dave Matthews and
Barenaked Ladies CDs, eating gummy bears and Laffy Taffy
until we were sick, going through our stash of different kinds
of cigarettes on the dash. We had somehow reasoned that
0
,
,
'
1
1
e
s.
d
Y·
when our throats were scratchy and sore (from smoking too
much, of course), the most logical cure would be to smoke a
menthol. After all, what ingredient did most throat lozenges
have in common? Ding. Ding. Ding. Menthol. At least we
were creative in justifying our addiction.
We arrived in Bradenton on a Friday afternoon. I hung
my head out the window of Claire's blue Cavalier and looked
up at the palm trees whizzing by. I could smell and taste the
salt in the air, and when we stopped on the gulf and walked
on the beach, I couldn't stop saying "Wow!" At one point,
Claire looked over at a couple who had been staring at us
and said, "First time seeing the ocean:' They smiled and I was
instantly reminded of that scene in Pretty Woman where Julia
Roberts has a similar reaction when she rides the elevator to
the penthouse. (Did I just make myself the prostitute in that
analogy? Well, you get the point.)
As it turns out, half of Claire's "people" was her gram,
a petite woman who spent her days in her housecoat, wore
oversize costume jewelry all the time and made a mean fuzzy
navel with fresh orange juice. The other half of Claire's people
was a short, balding man named Ted. He was Gram's third
husband and I spent the first few days of our trip assuming he
couldn't speak, only because he chose not to, ever.
I saw the sign for the parasailing company on our way back
from shopping near the beach. Claire and I were in the backseat, Ted and Gram in the front. I elbowed Claire and pointed
at the sign. "But you're afraid of heights;' she said.
Yes, I am afraid of heights.
"There are a lot of sharks in the bay;' she said. From the
driver's seat, Ted spoke for what may have been the first time
since we arrived, five days earlier. ''A lot of sharks in the bay;'
he echoed.
"Don't listen to this old fuddy-duddy;' Gram said. "Turn
around:'
Ted quietly obliged, as usual, and before long I was paying
my $55 to the counter man at a local parasailing outfitter. You
will soon understand why I am withholding the name. I had
paid my money and hadn't yet puked in the ladies' room when
they called my name.
"You're coming out on the boat with me, right?" I asked
Claire.
"Yeah, on the boat. I'll take pictures. You're crazy;' she said.
Yes, I am, a little.
We boarded the boat with a bald man and a man in a red
bandana (I'll call them Mr. Clean and Red Bandana). I quite
honestly don't remember their real names-although
by the
time we made it back to shore, I was calling them names
much more colorful than anything their mothers could have
dreamed of.
The get-up (harness, parachute and such) was apparently quite
amusing. Claire would not stop taking pictures and laughing.
''Are you ready?" asked Red Bandana.
I nodded.
''Are you sure?" asked Claire.
I nodded again.
"Let's get this over with;' I said.
I must say that the first 200 feet of the 600-foot journey
were incredible. The water was a clear glass-green that seemed
bottomless. The sky was blue and there was a gentle breeze. I
could see Claire waving from the boat. I looked to the docks
and saw Gram waving wildly and Ted looking on, his hands
in the pockets of his khaki shorts. I truly felt as ifl were flying.
And then I looked at the rope-the one that was keeping me
from flying off into oblivion and sinking into the water to be
lunch for the sharks, my lifeline to my new best friends, Red
Bandana and Mr. Clean-and I saw something that looked
an awful lot like duct tape wrapped tightly around it. Duct
tape. I could feel a panic attack brewing. I looked around and
it was like I realized for the first time that I was in the air.
FlymgHigh continuedon page63
March 2009
I 37
BUDGET VACATION~
squa
and
out
rece
see
and
Bou
plac
or a
asw
rum
AMERICA'S
RIVIERA
BY CATHERINE
PLATO
N MY EIGHT
of William Randolph Hearst and lots of beaches where sea
YEARS of living on the California
lions and surfer girls lounge in the sand. Inland, farms and
coast, I had never really gotten to know the majority
of it. I'd lived in Los Angeles and San Francisco, but
vineyards stretch for miles.
Researching the trip beforehand, I couldn't find much that
my knowledge of the 400 miles of coastland in between consisted of what I had read in novels by was specifically"gay"about Santa Barbara. The city is considered generally gay-friendly, but is known more for its scenery.
Jack Kerouac and John Steinbeck and seen in the
movie Sideways.As a Californian who loves wine, sunshine
cuisine and overall quality of life than for the crazy nightlife
and anything pretentiously faux-French, I figured I owed
that you usually find in a gay mecca. Our first night there,
myself a trip to the region nicknamed the American Riviera. instead of searching out the gay bars ( they do exist), we
Santa Barbara, surrounded by wine country and situated 95 decide to have dinner at Bouchon, a cozy, candlelit restaurant
miles up the coast from Los Angeles,
in Santa Barbara's walkable downtown
WHERE
TOSTAY
is apparently where stars like Oprah
Great for anyone who wants a real taste
Winfrey, John T ravolta and Brad Pitt
of local California cuisine, Bouchon
TheFranciscan
Inn:Welovedthis
go to escape the "Hollywood scene:'
hotel,withitslarge,comfortable
rooms relies on local produce, fish and meat,
anda hottub.Thebeachisjusta short and its extensive wine list includes a secAlong with my old college roommate
walkaway.
Marian-a San Diego native, Bay Area
tion devoted to Santa Barbara wines.
resident and fellow American Riviera
Marian and I eyeballed the menu and,
virgin - I decided to escape the San
since we're both vegetarians, we got
Francisco scene with a road trip down
Bouchon:
Greatambience
andamazing a little nervous that the only choices
the coast. For us city dwellers, the midfoodandwinewitha decidedly
local
were chicken, venison, lamb and other
flair.I feltlikeI waseatingfroma vegdle of the state was about as mysterious
dishes made from creatures that once
etablegardenintherestaurant's
back- had faces and roamed the fields we had
as the middle of the country. To get a
yard.Theservicewasalsoexceptional. just driven through. But when we asked
feel for this 400-mile stretch, we drove
down the Pacific Coast Highway. If
NaturalCafe:Thislocalchainhasgreat, our server for veggie options, he was
you ever have a chance to do this, you
cheap,healthy
andsort-of-healthy extremely accommodating. We each
options
forvegetarians
aswellasthose listed our favorite vegetables, he told us
must: The view from every other turn
whoeatfishandchicken.
Weateatthe
looks like the page of a calendar, and the
what was in season, then showed up with
restaurant
onStateStreet,butthereare unique, meatless creations made just to
route passes through the breathtaking
eightotherlocations.
region of Big Sur, the stunning estate
suit our individual tastes: sweet pureed
38
Icurve
and
phy.
the
frol
are!
lS
to
tha
Hu
De
Clo
gay
Sh
the
TIMESTOVISIT
squash and an array of lightly steamed
see, and in a perfect state of relaxation,
SantaBarbara
hasa Mediterranean
cliand sauteed local vegetables. It turned
where
I could either have passed out at
mate,soyoudon'tneedto worryabout
out to be one of my favorite meals of
the hotel or kept on going, depending
nastyweatherwhenyou'replanning
recent memory. From our table we could
yourtrip,butyoumaywantto goduring what we found next. We decided to
see other people's flesh-covered plates
check out a bar on the pier that we had
oneofthesefestivals:
and I'll admit those looked great, too.
walked
by earlier in the day.
TheSantaBarbaraWomen'sLiterary
Bouchon (French for "cork") is the first
A great thing about Santa Barbara
Festival:Thisone-day
festivalin late
place I would bring my food-snob father
is that most destinations are walkable,
February
celebrates
"diversity,
literacy
or a date I'd like to impress. Dessert was
and the weather is often nice enough
andsocialjustice"withreadings
and
a sweet apple tart served with a caramelthat you actually want to walk everylectures
byacclaimed
femaleauthors.
rum sauce and cinnamon ice cream and,
Featured
authors
in thepasthave
where. Generally, we felt quite safe
included
queer-community
favorites
like the rest of the meal, it felt very fresh
walking around at night, though we did
Rebecca
WalkerandKatiaNoyes.
and homemade-as
if the fruit had
have one local guy scream "Dykes!" at
been picked from a backyard orchard.
us as we held hands trekking through
PacificPrideFestival:Don'texpect
The next morning, we stumbled out
downtown. The reason it wasn't more
to partyas hardasyouwouldin the
of our rooms, downed black coffee and
biggerCalifornia
cities-but sinceSanta alarming was because he was drunk
Barbara
Pridedoesn'thappenuntilJuly, and shakily riding a unicycle. Before
arrived at the pier ( a few blocks' walk
youcanhitit afterthefanfarehasdied
from the hotel) for our morning whaleI could write off the city as a nasty
downin LosAngeles
andSanFrancisco. hotbed of homophobia, Marian rewatching expedition. Fooled by the sunshine streaming through our hotel winOUTrageous!
FilmFestival:Founded minded me that there are drunken
dow, we wore T-shirts and packed light
in 1992,SantaBarbara's
ownfour-day
lunatics everywhere. She was right.
LGBT
filmfesttakesplaceeveryyear
sweatshirts. But we were completely
The second most offensive thing that
in November.
wrong and ended up shivering throughhappened all weekend was at the next
out the entire four-hour expedition. I
bar we stopped into, where some
brought a cup of coffee along with me hoping it would keep
tipsy frat boys threw popcorn at us in an awkward, adolesme warm, but 10 minutes into the voyage through the choppy
cently flirtatious way, then offered to buy us drinks. We
Pacific Ocean, I was wearing my beverage, and it was cold by accepted, and then sauntered away to a private table, without
then, too. If you go, bring more clothing than you think you'll
them. Not so bad.
need. Though I wish I'd brought a down jacket, the Captain
While it doesn't wear a rainbow-colored heart on its sleeve,
Condor cruise was an awesome way to spend our morning,
the way its larger coastal cousins might, Santa Barbara offers
and was certainly worth getting out of bed early for. Minor
visitors-be they Oprah or a couple of San Francisco dykesphysical discomfort melted away as we oohed and aahed over a great escape from big-city life and some of the best food and
the first gray whales we spotted, followed by a small pod of
scenery the Golden State has to offer. My final advice to travfrolicking dolphins. Santa Barbarians, as I like to call them,
elers: Always take the scenic route, walk whenever possible,
are lucky because they get to see sea life year round: migrating
dress in more layers than you think you'll need and ignore the
gray whales in December through April, and humpback and
man on the unicycle. The rest of the people in Santa Barbara
blue whales the rest of the year. Porpoises, sea lions as well as are pretty nice. ■
various species of dolphin ( all of which looked the same to
me) are also visible for most of the year.
We spent our afternoon wandering State Street, which
is comparable to the main thoroughfare of other college
towns-shops, restaurants, bars and coffee shops-but with
that certain special California flair (hippies hitchhiking to
Humboldt). Shops worth stopping into included the Book
Den, a locally loved, independent used book store, and the
Closet, a cool vintage store with a name that nicely lends itself to
gay puns. The Blue Bee and Victorian Vogue & the Costume
Shoppe, both on State Street, are other places locals told us
they love to shop.
Slightly drunk and giggly from our evening martinis, too
much sugar and an excess of daytime sunshine, Marian and
I wandered back down State Street toward the beach, hand
in hand. It was dark and packs of college-age kids and older
couples shuffled down the street as dinnertime was ending
and the night was getting started. I felt comfortably full, still
happy and in awe over the stupid dolphins I froze my ass off to
HERE DO THE cool dykes go in Paris? You
have to be tipped off with a text from les lesbiennes
cools, la jetset mechante.
In Berlin, you can jump in a cab and say,"Take me to
a dyke bar;' and immediately get laid twice by extremely
hot chicks. But in Paris, the driver might drop you at a
place with three snooty lesbians, each tres skinny, sipping
cognac and shooting you dirty looks.
The one Parisian dyke club where all the hipsters went
every weekend, the world-famous Le Pulp, closed last year.
There, for the last two decades, you could have seen chick
bands and stayed to dance afterward, getting high on piles
of cocaine spoon-fed to you in back rooms by some leatherclad motor scooter butches with long hair, then got a measly
square of butcher paper at the door to the restrooms from
a cute, anorexic, punk boy with a pincushion for a face and
sipped $10 drinks until 5 a.m.
Now, you have to know where to search on MySpace
for this week's fabulous party. If you're looking for queer
burlesque, dancing, rock and electro shows, dinner or a wellknown American dyke band on tour, it all happens on boats
called peniches (pronounced pay-neesh) and in clubs.
Most of the parties are mixed. It's a very queer scene.
Dykes, fags, les trans and gender nonconformists all seem to
hang together. There are 72 transpedegouines ( transfagsdykes,
meaning alternativequeers). If one of them moves to Berlin,
the rest of them know that there are now 71.
For an intellectually stimulating and deliciously cheap
dinner, check out Queer Food for Love. Once a month, Les
40
I curve
Pantheres Roses rents a storefront restaurant in an alley,
where you can share the prix fixe vegan menu prepared by
transpedegouines in a tiny kitchen and served to 10 picnic
tables crammed into a minuscule dining room. You're sitting
on top of one another, so you have no choice but to socialize.
Dinner costs about $12, and your tablemates will gladly discuss queer feminist politics in English, if you so desire.
If you want to go strictly lesbian, you can check out Chez
Maune in Pigalle, the red light district, where the ladies are
stuck in the 1980s. It's a time warp with historical decor.
There is nothing more charming than a big gay party on
a peniche that's sitting low in the Seine, scintillating with ~
fairy lights and fairies. Inside, there may be porno flicks, DJs,~
rope tricks or drag king shows. You never know on a peniche. ~
I-Besides, it's fun to say peniche.
~
[IJ
Sometimes, you have to go to a straight club where there ffi
just happens to be a lesbian or queer show. Rock clubs like La~
Cigale, Le Bataclan or La Fleche d'Or don't have dyke bounc· ~
ers, but if you turn on the charm you can still shoulder your ~
z
way to the front to mingle with the French babes and soak up ~
the likes of the Gossip, Scream Club, the Dresden Dolls, the ~
Cliks or K.T. Tunstall.
§
There is a strong lesbian feminist presence in Paris. These
women throw dungeon parties and heatedly discuss modern
feminist issues like trans inclusion. You can find cheap ~
(/)
pisse debouts (literally "piss standing up"), the Travelmate ~
equivalent. A dyke named Killer has them for three euros. ~
z
Ask around.
~
At Butch Is Beautiful, a new party with performances, ;j_
i
!
LOVIN' THE 'BUSH
concerts and videos, all kinds of cute butches and femmes
come out of the closet. Paris is finally discovering gender
nonconformity. It could use some good old American role
models. And there is something called a Mustache Party,
where people of all genders sport upper-lip merkins.
Le Marais, the medieval gay part of town, is perfect
for romantic make-out strolls past 500-year-old buildings with exposed beams. It's the Parisian Castro or
Greenwich Village. You'll see queers everywhere, as well
as queer shops like Dollhouse, the dyke sex shop, where
you can sit in on a spanking workshop in English, then
buy French sex toys and lingerie, which are way classier
than ours. Fuzzier. Pinker.
Shop 'til you drop in on a queer sidewalk cafe to enjoy
cognac or Bordeaux, espresso or Perrier, and relax on a
summer evening. Whether you're gazing into the eyes of
the hottie you picked up the night before at Le Nyx or
watching the Parisian babe parade, it doesn't get any better
than this. ■
WHILE
INFRANCE
HOTBURLESQUE
ACTSTOCATCH
• TheDragKingFemmeShow.Hilarious
andsexy.
Mostlyqueercrowd.myspace.com/dkfs
ey,
by
• LesKissesCauseTrouble.
Queercomedy,
cutefatgirls,
tattoos.
Mixedcrowd.myspace.com/kissescausetrouble
• LeCabaretdesFlllesde Joie.
Hotshowgirls
onstage,
some
ofthemdykes.Mixedcrowd.
myspace.com/
lecabaretdesfillesdejoie
HOTLOCAL
ROCK
ACTS
• TheFlaming
Pussy
• Deborah
Degouts
• Process
• Anatomie
Bousculaire
INLEMARAIS:
• l'AOC.Forfancylesbians.
Appears
to bea common
French
cafe.In fact,upscale.
• le 3 Kafe.Lesbianbar.For18-to 3O-year-olds.
Dancing.
Drinks.Connections.
• le yx Cafe.LesbianBar.Dancing.
Techno.
• Dollhouse.
Fancysexshopforgirls.
• le ouffl urs.A straightbarwherepartieslike
ButchIs Beautiful
happen.
• le Yono.A straightbarwhereMustache
Parties
happen
monthly.
• le RiveGauche.A nightclub
somewhere
onthe
LeftBank.Forolderlesbians.
IN BELLEVILLE
th nei hborhood
forstudents
and rtists:
L'Okubl.LaRotisserie.
QueerFoodforLovehappens
heremonthly.
>> Formoreinfoonvisiting,
logonto paris-gay.com.
WHAT WOMEN WANT IS AT BREITENBUSH
HOT SPRINGS. BYAISLINN CLEVENGER
VER THE RIVER and through the woods-to
perhaps
the farthest from grandmother's house one could go-lies
Breitenbush Hot Springs. Nestled in an old-growth forest 10 miles from the
nearest town and 90 miles from super-queer-friendly Portland, Ore., this profoundly beautiful retreat is a unique place for women who want to get away
from it all and renew themselves. I have been blessed with the opportunity to
visit Breitenbush many summers, when my mother fills in for full-time staff
members on vacation.
The 'Bush, as devotees affectionately call it, is a place to nurture my mind,
body and soul. Breitenbush also offers over 150 workshops, conferences and
gatherings every year. While most of these workshops are open to any gender,
there are many that cater specifically to women. My visits, however, consist of
simple relaxation.
To me, there is nothing better than waking early, strolling through the
ancient trees to one of the various hot springs and easing my body into the
healing waters (clothing-optional). The three meadow pools, which are lined
with smooth river rocks, look out over a field of tall grass that gently slopes
down to the Breitenbush River. Relaxing to the sound of the rushing water is
an amazing way to start the day. A short distance away, the four tiled spiral
tubs face each of the four directions. A plunge into the cold-water tub after
cooking in one of the hot ones is incredibly invigorating-it brings every part
of me to life.
After a soak, a walk on the gravel paths leads me to the historic lodge that
houses the dining room. My mouth waters as soon as I get to the buffet-style
food, which is vegetarian, mostly organic and caters to special diets. Being
gluten-intolerant, I am always grateful to find a gluten-free version of the main
dish. The lodge also houses the library and the north wing, where a majority
of the workshops and concerts are held. With my tummy full, I am fond of
curling up with a book on the large, comfy couch in the library and drifting
into a lazy sleep until lunch time.
After lunch, I like to awaken my senses by taking a hike. The way the sun
streams through the Emerald Forest and highlights the vine maple leaves is
majestic. The two-and-a-half-mile Spotted Owl Trail Loop is my favorite if
I want to take my time, but the Emerald Forest Trail offers a more ambitious
five-mile hike that usually gets me back right on time for dinner.
If no concert or activity is planned after dinner, I treat myself to one of the
Lovin' the 'Bush continued on page 63
March 2009
I41
Velvety voiced vixen Rose Rollins may have slipped below our radar with early bit
parts in TV shows like The West Wing and films such as Mission Impossible Ill, but
with her turn as the guarded yet venerable Captain Tasha Williams in season four of
The L Word, she has firmly entrenched herself on our must-watch list. Since Rollins
joined the cast, her character has dealt with post-traumatic stress disorder from a
tour in Iraq, faced off with Kelly McGillis in a court of law, justified the introduction
of the oft-maligned Papi and swept Alice Pieszecki-along
with the audience-off
her feet with that husky, criminally sexy laugh of hers. She was even able to successfully pull off the cringe-tastic pseudopolitical line: "Shut up, please, your bush
is the only bush I want to think about right now." (Shame on you, Ilene Chaiken.)
And while Rollins also showed plenty of chutzpah in her role as resident badass
sociopath Monique Jones in out director Angela Robinson's online series Girltrash!,
we are happy to report that the real-life Rollins is just as friendly and down to earth
as a fangirl could hope for. As the final season of The L Word was set to air, she
shared what it meant to her to play a veteran in a time of war, why she hopes for an
L Word movie and how the story line she wanted was too controversial for TV.
•
ay1n
Nowthat TheL Wordis enteringits sixthandfinal
season,howdoyoufeelabouttheshowending?
Well, I think it's bittersweet. It was such a great experience for me-like, my ultimate experience so far working as an actor-just working with all these talented
women. But it's definitely time for it to end. I mean, it's
been six years and it's better to go out on a high note
than to go out because no one is watching it.
have time to listen to their stories. And I definitely
want to come across as authentic as possible. And I
did feel a definite sense of responsibility, and I also
felt chat...just remembering that I still am an actor
and I am doing my best, but I definitely took it very
seriously-and so did they.
In seasonfive,Tashahadto facea verydifficultdecisionfor someone
whois so definedby her miliAre you happywith wherethe storyleavesyour tary career.In the end,shechoseto leaverather
character,
Tasha?
thanlie.Doyouagreewith herdecision?
Um, no, to be honest. [Laughs]I feel like a lot of ques- I feel that I would have done the same thing. Not
tions might go unanswered, and I don't know-we'll
see how the fans react, but it will definitely be interesting. I think that the note that the show ends on
could be quite controversial.
necessarily that I would be doing it for love, but just
for my beliefs. It's like, why would you want to risk
your life for anyone-no matter if [it's] the government or any movement-who is not going to appreSpeakingof controversial,
youplaya veryvisible ciate you for who you are, and for what you're doing?
veteranin a time whenwe havemorefemalevet- And be ignorant enough to judge and feel that you're
eransthanever.Doyoufeel a lot of responsibility not worthy to be risking your life for them? I feel like
in that role?
that's the biggest insult ever. Why would I want to
Definitely, and even when I meet women who have fight for someone like that?
gone through the same thing, it's just like I always Howelsedidbeingon TheL Wordchangeyourlife?
42
I curve
It definitely was the first opportunity for me to live
my life comfortably through acting (alone]. I've always
had other jobs-other
means of employment-until
this show, so it definitely was my first breakthrough
show, to finally establish myself as a working actor. It
was a great ride and great opportunity, but I still feel
that it's the beginning-it's definitely the beginning.
Now I feel like I can just be taken a little more seriously as an actor, but I have so far to go.
Doyouhaveanyfilm or TVprojectscomingup?
No, actually, it's pretty weird out there. There is not
much going on because of the impending strike and
hopefully [that] doesn't happen. I just got new representation across the board and were building a plan
for me to get back out there. It's pretty intense out
there right now-it's not easy. It's kind of"back to the
might be a little too controversial. But I chink someone needs to give that story legs.
Did beingon The L Wordin any way make you
questionyourownsexualidentity?
[Laughs]Oh my gosh, that's funny! I don't know how
to answer chat. I mean, everyone always has questions
at some point in their life. I don't know how co answer
this (and be] politically correct. [Laughs]I don't think
it has, no. I chink I am coming out kind of the same
person chat I was going in. It's been a great experience
and I've always been open. I feel like it's not really two
drawing board:' [Laughs]
worlds-it's
all one world.
Is thatsomething
thatchangedas a resultof being
onthe show?
No, no. I've always felt like that, and because I'm sobecause I'm such a tomboy, I've been mistaken for a
lesbian before I even had the role of Tasha. [Laughs]
Andhowis it now?Canyougo anywherewithout
So far, everyoneis very tight-lippedaboutthe as
fans?
yetuntitledL Wordspin-off,butis thereanychance the screaming
Yeah, I still can. You know, what's funny is that it
we'll getto seeTashamakean appearance?
depends on how I wear my hair, Ir's really funny.
When I wear my hair back I (get] four times the
amount [of attention] than when I wear my hair
show has to get picked up.
down, or when I am looking a little more girly. I
Onthe topic of not closingdoors,we haveheard
guess I am unrecognizable until someone hears me
rumorsof a possibleL Wordfilm.ls thereanytruth
speak or something. It's pretty interesting how difto the rumors?
ferent fans identify me. I do notice chat when I'm
Well, there definitely has been talk, but we still don't
in New York-because I am in New York a lot-I
know. It's still all up in the air, but hopefully it will
definitely get approached a lot more than when I
happen.
am in L.A., which is odd. I would have thought it
Maybe. (I] definitely wouldn't close chat door. I mean,
we never know. I can't answer"definitely" yet. First the
"IfeelthatIwould
have
[leftthe
military
ifIwere
in
Tasha's
position].
It's
like,whywould
you
want
toriskyour
life
foranyone
...whois
notgoing
toappreciateyouforwhoyou
are,andforwhat
you're
doing?
Ifeel
likethat's
thebiggest
insult
ever:'
Is that something
youwouldbe interestedin revisingyourrolefor?
would be the opposite.
Whilewe're on the subjectof screamingfans,we
got to speakto JenniferBealsa coupleof weeks
ago,andshespokepassionately
aboutcampaigning for Obama.Wereyou involvedat all with the
really wrap things up.
Evenif that doespanout,for nowyouare bidding campaign?
the characteradieu.Whatdo youthinkyou'rego- Yeah, yeah.
We'reyouhappywiththe resultofthe election,and
ingto missmostaboutplayingTasha?
howwasthat experience?
It's just great being able to play a character who you
Yeah, definitely, I would definitely be interested in
that because I feel like we owe it to our characters and
we also owe it co the fans to just really, really, really,
respect and you know so well. I just had so much
fun-she was just really easy for me and just very
close co me, this character. I am going to miss everything about her.
Definitely. I mean, anything that we could do to be
part of this huge movement-I
was just honored.
We all went out to Philly to help with a fundraiser,
so that was great experience, and Jennifer is definitely
passionate about it all. She definitely influenced and
The L Wordwas never shy abouttacklingcontroversialtopics,but were there any story lines inspired me as well.
Were you surprised by the outcome of the
that just didn'thappen,or that youwish hadbeen
Proposition
8?
fleshedoutmore?
There was always a story line that I wanted to [do],
and Leisha (did] also, but I felt that it would have just
been a little too controversial because of us being a
bi-racial couple. We wanted see if we could explore
domestic violence among same-sex partnerships. I
think that it's a lot more prevalent than people would
assume, and I feel like it is something that has never
really been touched on and should have been. I think
it's really intense, but I guess that it might be a subject char people don't really want to touch, because it
Yes, I was shocked! I was shocked. It was so bad. And
isn't it unconstitutional, what they're doing? I don't
understand how that was allowed. It's crazy. Yeah, it's
really bad.
Doyouhaveanyfinalwordsfor all the L Wordfans
outthere?
I just want co thank all of the fans for their support
and for allowing the show to go for as long as it did.
We really appreciate them. Speaking (for] myself and
all of the cast, we really, really appreciate them. ■
March 2009 \ 45
Outlaw dvke 6tvlefrom nvc.
Photos by Leshe
• Van Stelten
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OUTFITTER~. ove from RIGGED/
March 2009
I47
With every car buyer concerned about fuel economy and the impact her automotive choice
will have on che environment, thank goodness it is becoming easier to make the transition
to a greener car. If you want to determine precisely how green your new car choice is, the
Environmental Protection Agency offers both the Smart Way program and the online Green
Vehicle Guide. The Green Vehicle Guide allows you to comparison shop by vehicle name and
type and will calculate the greenest vehicle among those you choose. While in 2008, only 26
percent of the cars tested received the Smart Way designation, that percentage is rising quickly,
thanks to some exciting new 2009 models. Below, in no particular order, are eight of our top
picks for cars that will provide you with a fun, green and economical driving experience.
Volkswagen
JettaTOICleanDiesel
BMW335d
With a 3.0 liter, in-line, six-diesel engine that
BMW claims will consume 25 percent less
fuel than equally powerful engines, che 335d
gees 23 mpg in che city and 36 mpg on the
highway. It is the environmentally cleanest
car BMW has ever produced and can certainly challenge the hybrids. Capable of going
from zero to 60 in just 6.2 seconds, the 3 35d
is truly a driver's car. Prices start at $43,900.
SmartFortwo
If you don't need a lot of interior space
and want a spiffy car that you can
park practically anywhere, you'll find
this little bargain adorable. Popular in
Europe for years, the Smart Fortwo
gets between 33 and 41 mpg. The
Smart Fortwo two-seater now comes
with optional head-thorax side airbags and has a five-speed automated
manual transmission with a manual
or automatic mode. The base price
starts at a user-friendly $12,000 for
the Smart Fortwo pure and $17,000
for the Smart Fortwo cabriolet.
48
Icurve
Like the BMW 335d, the Volkswagen Jetta
TDI is a clean diesel car and was the first diesel-powered new car to be certified for sale
across the United States. Its fuel economy,
according to Volkswagen, will be 30 percent
better than the gasoline-powered Jetta, even
though the engines are the same size. The
Jetta TDI is expected to exceed 40 mpg in
the city and 50 mpg on the highway. The
2009 Volkswagen Jetta TDI comes in two
models, a sedan ($21,990) and a sportwagen
($23,590).
FordFusionHybrid
An eco-friendly Fusion Hybrid is Ford'
first attempt at a hybrid sedan and the car
has been nominated (along with the BMW
335d, Smart Fortwo, Volkswagen Jetta
TDI and Saturn Vue 2 Mode Hybrid) as
one of the greenest cars of 2009. Ford says
the Fusion and Milan hybrids will be able
to cruise at speeds up to 47 mph on electric power alone. The Fusion Hybrid will be
among the first Ford hybrids to use an electric air-conditioning compressor to save engine load. With no number yet available for
highway mileage, the Ford Fusion Hybrid
is rated at 38 mpg in the city. The price is
expected to be about $5,000 more than a
comparable Ford Fusion.
ToyotaPrius
Last year, the Toyota Prius
was the most fuel-efficient vehicle sold in the United States.
A mid-size car, the Prius has
become a hit with consumers because of its 45 mpg city
and 48 mpg highway rating,
its great acceleration and its
handling ease. With three
models available, prices start
at $22,000. As with most hybrid cars, it can
take up to 15,000 miles of
driving before you achieve
the peak mpg. Changes in
design and performance
are planned for the 2010
model year.
HondaCivicHybrid
With a base price of
$24,000 and a fuel-efficiency rating of 40 mpg in
the city and 45 mpg on the
highway, the Honda Civic
Hybrid was designed to
prove that environmental-
ism and style can work together. Last year, US
News and World Report ranked the Honda
Civic Hybrid third out of 34 affordable small
cars. Unlike the Toyota Prius, the Honda
Civic Hybrid doesn't run in pure electric
mode, but it is a fun, frisky car to drive.
MiniCooperandClubman
A surprisingly successful reincarnation of the
old British Mini, the Mini Cooper and its big
brother, the Mini Clubman, are sporty green
vehiclesthat are a lot of fun to drive.This year,
Mini introduced the new high-performance
John Cooper Works edition, powered by
208 horses. All Coopers come in base and S
models-the S hatchbacks and the Clubman
are turbocharged, and the S convertible is
supercharged, producing 168 horsepower.
Averaging 28 mpg in the city and 37 mpg on
the highway,the Mini Cooper is considered a
mini compact car-bigger than a two-seater
and smaller than a subcompact. Prices for the
2009 Minis start at $19,000 but rise steeply
as the you deck the car out.
SaturnVueGreenUne2 ModeHybrid
The only crossover on this list, GM's Saturn
Vue Green Line 2 Mode Hybrid is the first
front-wheel-drive car to use GM's 2 Mode
Hybrid technology. GM says the Vue 2
Mode's fuel economy will be 50 percent better than that of the gas-only V-6, which it
rates at 16 mpg in the city and 22 mpg on
the highway. The Saturn Vue Green Line
2 Mode Hybrid is expected to have a range
of over 500 miles. With production beginning in late 2008, prices were not available
at press time. ■
March 2009
I 49
NEm BROWN
and Star Johnson are like most young
c uP,les. 111ey go to college, take walks along the
water, read, write poetry. And, most importantly,
they're finally both 21, which means they can go out
and party sometimes, too.
Unlike most twentysomething couples, Brown and
Johnson are homeless, splitting nights between the
grimy plastic seats of the New York City subway and
friends' couches. That was until they found shelter ar
Sylvia'sPlace, just one of three LGBT-specific youth
shelters that nave opened in the city since 2002 to deal
with he overflow of homeless queer youth.
At Sylvia's Place, Brown and Johnson, along with
26 other young people in this 20-bed facility,sleep on
the floor, share only one shower and fight off mice.
B\lt at least, they, y, fro 6 p.m. until 8 a.m., they
have a afe place to call home-even •f that pl cc •s an
industrial loft with no real beds.
"It's just good to be off the street and out
cold;' says Brown. "We sleep on the floor. and
people ask us how we can do that everynight.
good, for the moment, just to have a placeto
and change:'
Brown and Johnson are but a small part
York'shom,elessyoum, one-third of whom ide
LGBT, according to a 2007 estimate by the
Gayand Lesbian 'task Force. The City of Ne
also recently confirmed th~ figure in a stud
ration. Almost everyone at Sylvia's Place can share
at least one traumatic story from their journey to
achieve freedom for their sexual identity.
"We're all here because were either runawa or
throwaways;•says Ojai Xi, a 19-year-old transg nder
teen from Queens. Xi left home at an early ag and
traveled through Kentucky, Washington state and
Pennsylvania in search of somewhere secure before
landing back in ew York at Sylvia's Place five years
later. She's come to regard the shelter as her makeshift
home.
Johnson and Brown, like Xi, are both runaways. "I
had a huge fight with my brothers about being a lesbian and my mom told me to get out;' says Brown.''So
I did. They couldn't accept who I was, so I couldn't
ray there:•
her rooltlyn horn shortly after com-
.~~!:~~~}.\
told me if she ever found out I was a lesbian,
C)ll~ she"She
would kick me out;' says Johnson. She couldn't
bring Brown home, so instead she spent the nights
c:c>"~"~ll,ITY
with her-sleeping in subway cars and using friends'
IS 1~c:1~1s1s--apartments to shower and change. The couple repeated the same cycle every day for months while man11-113~1:•s
11
aging to keep their part-time jobs as a nanny and a
,fl:l~Y secretary
and still attend college classes.
"From
one I got evicted, she's been with meLl,~ITl:ll that's a longdaytime;'
says Brown.
A"~C)lA~TSShelters like Sylvia's Place on West 36th Street
attempt to provide relief, as well as case manage<>1=
31:llS1=<>1:J
ment and medical care. But with fewer than 50 beds
citywide, LGBT shelters are calling the problem of
Lc;3yYC)lJTl-1
1
disenfranchised queer youth an epidemic. There are
1
Tl-113~1:
S transitional
living programs that help LGBT youth
off the streets, but it can take months to find
,fl3~Y LITTLI: get
housing through these, and there are few options in
S13~,tK:l:Sthe meantime-other city-sponsored youth shelters
Tl-IA
T Al~I:
SA1=1:.
are unwelcoming.
11
"You can't set up a system for runaway and
homeless youth without acknowledging the huge
percentage that fall into the category of LGBT;'
says New York City Councilman Lewis Fidler
(D-Brooklyn), who has continually pushed for more
youth shelter funding. "Our numbers clearly show
that it's 30 to 40 percent:'
When Fidler first set out to expand the city's youth
shelter program six years ago, Covenant House, a
shelter run by the Catholic Church, was one of the
only publicly funded youth shelter programs. "We
were very, very troubled by the low percentage that
Covenant House identified as LGBT youth-about
3 percent;' says Fidler, who also says that at the time,
the shelter actually had empty beds, in spite of a massive homeless youth population.
54
Icurve
Since 2006 the Department of Youth and
Community Development, which operates Runaway
and Homeless Youth Services, has certified two new
programs specifically contracted to provide services for
queer youth. Advocates, however, charge that requirements for certification from DYCD, such as gender
segregation, are not possible in queer youth shelters.
They also claim that Covenant House, the city's largest youth shelter, is not safe for queer youth. In "mainstream" shelters, they say, LGBT youth struggle with
harassment, discrimination and other offenses.
Tiffany Parker, a 23-year-old transgender girl from
Alabama, was first placed in a men's shelter when she
came to New York. There, she says, she was bullied
into performing sexual acts on other men, and then
moved to the women's shelter, where some women
were alarmed by her masculine appearance. Finally,
she ended up at Sylvia's Place, but says she still
struggles with things like finding a job because of
her gender identity.
''A lot of queer youth are not safe going to
Covenant House;' says Patrick Markee, a senior
policy analyst for the Coalition for the Homeless.
"They've experienced firsthand violence or discrimination, which is why we've seen a lot of smaller
LGBT shelters opening up. Markee says that while
funding has increased in the last two years for queer
shelters, funding for shelters like Sylvia's Place is still
not adequate, leaving most of the youth to sleep on
the floor in sleeping bags.
"Sylvia's Place is great, to a certain extent;' says
Johnson. "But it lacks a lot because it really doesn't get
much funding:' While Sylvia's Place offers case working, shelter, food, drop-in services and group 1 •
allet, creative writing and trans empowermt'. r
ttll
lacks many resources. Like, for example, enougl k1--p•
LC;3TI-IC)l,'11:Ll:SS
YC)lJTl-1
Homelessness
amongst
LGBT
youthis notanissuelimitedto justonecity,or evena
fewcities-it's nationwide.
"Lesbian,
gay,bisexual
andtransgender
youthcontinue
to makeupa disproportionate
numberof runaway
andhomeless
youth-as manyas
40 percent,"
saysReaCarey,
executive
directorof theNational
GayandLesbian
Task
Force,
whosestudyonhomeless
queeryouthfirst broughtnationalattention
to thesubject."It is a nationaldisgrace
thatyouthcontinue
to beturnedoutof theirhomesand
communities
basedontheiractualor perceived
sexualorientation
or genderidentity,"
saysCarey.
Here'sa lookat thehomeless
LGBT
youthsituationin citiesnationwide.
:IOSTON
> Morethan750youthsbetween
the
agesof 18and25wereusingtheemergencysheltersystemin 2002,thelast
yearthatdatawaspubliclyavailable.
> Anestimated
150to 300youths
involved
withtheBostonsheltersystem
identifyasLGBT.
ing bags to go around, or even the money to move to
a space that meets New York State Office of Children
and Family Services regulations, in order to get more
funding.
With only 20 beds, Sylvia'sPlace is the largest single
queer youth shelter in the city. Still, employees often
find themselves having to turn kids away.
"Were so full right now;' says Kate Barnhart, dropin coordinator at Sylvia's Place. "We have 27 kids in a
facility meant for 20. And there are thousands of kids
out there:•
"Our community is in crisis-there's very limited
amounts of beds for LGBT youth, there's very little
services that are safe;' says Glo Ross, lead organizer
at the youth-orcolor queer activist group FIERCE.
Ross heads a campaign to develop a 24- 7 youth center
on the decaying Pier 40-another attempt to give queer
youth a place to go.
For now, Johnson and Brown are glad to have a
home at Sylvia's Place, but they're working hard to
get out of the shelter system and into an apartment
of their own. They're attending classes at the College
of New Rochelle in Brooklyn and doing odd jobs to
make money when they have time away from their
studies. Brown hopes to become a forensic scientist
and Johnson wants to be a nurse.
"The situation is stressful at times, so
we argue a bit much;' says Johnson. "But
we try to stay positive. Loving each other
is what gets us through this, at the end of
the day:'
"When we first met, there were fireworks;• adds Johnson, shyly clutching
Brown's hand in front of the shelter on a
chilly weekday night. "She's everything to
me-she's the light I always needed:' ■
> Thecityhassupported
trainingto
address
theneedsof homeless
LGBT
youthat shelters
throughout
thecity,
and2,000Department
of SocialServices
DENVER
staffmembers
statewide
underwent
> In 2004,therewere
LGBT
awareness
training.
853 homelessyouths
>Additionally,
WalthamHouse,a private
betweenthe agesof
organization
in Waltham,
Mass.,provides 15 and25 in metroservicesandshelterspecifically
for
politanDenver.
LGBTyouth.
> Between
170and
340
homeless
youths
CHCAGO
identifyasLGBT.
> Chicago
hasbetween12,000and
15,000homeless
youth,according
to the > Themayorof Denver
NightMinistry,anorganization
serving
hasimplemented
a
homeless
andrunaway
youth.
10-yearplancalled"Denver's
Road
Home"
aimed
at
ending
homelessness.
> Between
1,500and3,000homeless
Theprogram
is committed
to ending
Chicago
youthsidentifyasLGBT.
homelessness
for everydemographic,
but
> Fewerthan200bedsareavailable
city- thereis nospecificfocusonLGBT
youth.
widefor homeless
youth,andnoneare
designated
specifically
for LGBT
youth.
LOSANGEI..ES
> Additionally,
theChicago
Coalition
for
> Thereareestimated
to be morethan
theHomeless
estimates
thatin theyear
4,000homeless
youthsages13to 21
2000,42 percentof youthsseekingstate- in the LosAngeles
metropolitan
area,
fundedshelterfor homeless
youthwere
basedonthe2005LosAngeles
Homeless
turnedaway.
Services
Authority
census.
> Between
830and1,660homeless
youthsidentifyasLGBT.
> Presently,
therearenocity-,countyor state-funded
programs
aimedat
homeless
LGBT
youth;however,
theLA
Gay& LesbianCenter's
Kruks-Tilsner
Transitional
LivingProgram
provides
transitional
housing,
andGay& Lesbian
Adolescent
SocialServices
(GLASS)
provides
healthandsocialservices
to LGBT
youth.
March 2009
I 55
REVIEWS
I Music
SouthernBelles
Twangy tunes to get you singing along. By Margaret Coble
Sel Ti led Pr •a J (Geffen
Records):
PrimaJ area pair
of Mexican
Americancousins
(18-year-old
Janelleand
19-year-old
JessicaMartinez)
whocroonandharmonize
theirwaythroughtheirdebut
album.Their13tracksdeal
with loveandits infinite
confusion,
in bothEnglish
andSpanish,
unitingboth
languages
withcatchyhooks
andbeats.Thetwosomehas
a soundthat'sreminiscent
of
mid'90sfemale-heavy
R&B
likeAaliyahandTLC,and
somesillysongtitlesandthe
lyricsto match("Homework"
and"Leftovers"
aretwothat
springto mind),butthealbum
is perfectfor gettingpumped
to gooutandparty,or to play
in the carafterthe 5 o'clock
whistleon Friday.Thetraviesa
track"Chilosa"is a surefire
clubhit,and"Girlfriend"is the
idealsoundtrack
for recoveringfrombeingspurned:"All
youhadto dowaslet me
knowfromthe beginning
thatyouhada girl."Singit,
sisters-er, cousins.
[Ainsley
Drew]
56 j curve
There's nothing like a little twang once and a while,
and singer-songwriters Lucinda Williams, Carrie
Elkin and Lee Ann Womack have got the goods,
whether it's Williams' bluesy Americana, Elkin's
rootsy eclecticism or Womack's more traditional
country sound.
Of course, it wouldn't be a Lucinda Williams record
if there weren't a few downers, so the poignant "If
Wishes Were Horses" fills in and "Knowing" and
"Rarity" offer more brooding sounds for those who
miss the good ol' depressing Williams of yore. On
the whole, it's an outstanding set for the 56-year-old
Louisiana native, who thankfully seems to be finding
LittleHoney,Luc"ndaWilliam (LostHighway): a little bit of bliss after all these years.
I've always been a fan of Lucinda Williams' moody,
introspective songwriting, husky voice and TexasThe Jeopardyof Circumstance,Carrie Elkin
Louisiana infused folk-alt-country sound, but I need
(self released)· Emerging
singer-songwriter
to mention how glad I am to hear her sounding-dare
Carrie Elkin has a few things in common with
I say it?-happy on this latest album. It's a refreshWilliams-time
spent in Texas (she's currently
ing change of pace, indeed. From the opening "Real
based in Austin), for starters, and a love of the
Love;' a downright gleeful blues-rock proclamation
Americana-roots musical spectrum. But in general,
of finding just that, to the hard-charging lovefest
her sound is more reminiscent of harder-to-categorize
"Honey Bee;' and the old-school country-blues of
eccentrics like Patti Griffin, Iris DeMent and even
"Well Well Well;' Williams' lyrics and music have a
Devon Sproule. This album is a lighter, brighter,
lighter air to them than we're accustomed to hearing
quirkier country-folk hybrid that exudes her eclecfrom her. Even the mellower numbers like the blues
tic gypsy spirit through sweet melodies and warm
smoker "Tears of Joy" and the dirgelike "Little Rock
lyrics. From the sparse, spiritually pondering opener,
Star" -a hopeful ode to self-destructive rock stars
"Obadiah," to the more upbeat "Roots & Wings;'
everywhere-seem to portray this new perspective.
about the age-old conflict between settling down
and wanderlust, to the guilt,
ridden acoustic singalong
"Did She Do Her Best" and
the perky, harmonica,filled
acoustic,pop love song"Broke
TV,"Elkin displays a wide mu,
sical range. The blues,rockin'
"Ode to Ogallala;' about get,
ting stranded in Ogallala,
Neb., after her Volkswagen
bus broke down, is probably
the best ensemble piece on
the record, showcasing her
stellar band, while "Shell of a
Man'' is my personal favorite,
a bluegrass banjo,fest with gospel flavoring,
written from the perspective of a man who,
during a palm reading, learns that he has a
short lifeline.
Womack returns to her
"neo,traditionalist" roots,
thanks in part to legendary
George Strait producer
Tony Brown. Though
there's still a tad too much
production on this 12,
cut disc-a
problem I
often have with Nashville
country
records- I'm
surprised at how much I
like this album. Womack
co,wrote the four cuts that
set the lyrical pace for the
rest of the album. These
songs' homage to vintage country, and the
already successful first single "Last Call" and
the flipside "Solitary Thinkin"' only cement
that association, with their drinking,alone,
in,a,bar themes. A few cuts do venture out
Call Me Crazy,Lee Ann Womack(MCA of sad,song territory, like the uplifting "I
Nashville):Veteran country music star Lee Found It in You" and the soaring "The Story
Ann Womack grew up in Texas, though now
of My Life;' but even these maintain the hall,
she's part of the Nashville country music
marks of classic country: slide guitars, violins
elite, with two Grammies and countless
and sweeping string arrangements. For those
other awards under her belt. Despite some
who enjoy a good old,fashioned Nashville,
of her mid,career forays into poppier "new drenched country record, give Womack and
country" fare, on this seventh studio effort
her crystalline voice a listen. ■
Q+A
Ronnda Cadle
Ronnda Cadle has been
playing the guitar for
over 20 years, but her big
break came in 2006, when
she opened for Sarah
Bettens and wowed the
crowd with her unique
instrumental sound. Her
most recent album, After,
was a group effort with
the String Poets.
Whendidyoufirst knowyouwanted
to be a music:an?
I was 16 and played in a heavy metal
band at the time, believe it or not. I was
a rock 'n' roller then-loved Paul Gibson
and Marshall Stack, '80s hair. I so
wanted to be Nancy Wilson from Heart
in the '80s, but she's actually the reason I
started playing acoustic anyway.
How did you an the S ring Poets
cometogether?
I was trying to find a lyrical writing part,
ner, because I don't sing. Finally, I just
stuck to my instrumental stuff and as
soon as I decided to do that, and was re,
ally getting out and doing my solo stuff,
these girls just dropped into my life, one
at a time. It was amazing.
Whatare someof yourmfluences?
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Johnsons
(Arista)
(Secretly
Canadian)
, TheDreamgirls
superThisconceptdisc
upontheir : starfinallyreleases
her
accompanies
Dalton's Following
2005international : much-anticipated
debut
first e-bookrelease,
I am a Bird : CD,showcasing
hervoDaughters
of theDead success,
Sea,bothof whichare Now,thisfive-songEP : calandmusicalrange
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singer-songwriters
Tori disc,TheCryingLight. Ne-Yo,
RobinThickeand
Mostnotableis the
Amos,Rachael
Sage
among
andMagdalen
Hsu-Li titletrack,a hypnotic, DianeWarren,
goosebump-inspiring, others.Standouts
will rejoicein this
ballad : include"Spotlight,"
melodic,piano-based eco-conscious
and,of
describing
a placethat , "Pocketbook"
drama-pop
opusfrom
theshowstopthe Minneapolis-based is rapidlydisappear- : course,
ing-Earth-and how per"AndI AmTelling
indieartist.
muchit will be missed.: YouI'm NotGoing."
Rusalka's
Umbrella
JennyDalton
(Glossy
Shoebox)
I look to travel for my influences.
When I go out on tour, which I am
about to do on the West Coast for four
months, it's the scenery that inspires
me. I get all relaxed and that's where it
really comes from.
Whatkmdof relationship
do you
havewith the lesbiancom uni ?
I'm membership director for Fourth
Tuesday Atlanta, one of the largest and
oldest lesbian groups in Atlanta. Also,
Joyce Tree and her partner, Dot, started
Swiftwaters Campground over 30 years
ago. My CD is dedicated to Joyce, who
passed away Dec. 31, 2006. I hold an
annual music festival at Swiftwaters. The
goal is to generate people to come out
and save the campground because it's
a legacy... ! want to keep Joyce and her
partner's memory alive. [KellyRulon]
~
March 2009
I 57
REVIEWSBooks
Betweenthe Lines
This month, it's dykes in cartoons and in the kitchen. By Rachel Pepper
The EssentialDykesto WatchOut For,Alison
Bechdel (HoughtonMifflin): For years, Alison
Bechdel has been a treasure dear to the hearts of
many in the dyke community. As the creator of the
long-running comic strip Dykes to Watch Out For,
Bechdel introduced us to Mo, Lois, Toni, Clarice,
Ginger, Sparrow and the rest of the gang. After the
recent mainstream success of Fun Home, Bechdel's
LifeIS a VerbPattiD"gh
moving autobiographical graphic novel, this compila(Skirt!):UsuallyI'd be
frightenedoff bya book tion of strips is likely to find a home on the shelves of
subtitled37 Daysto Wake lesbian fans old and new.
This collection, although not absolutely comUp,BeMindfulandLive
Intentionally.
ButPattiDigh, plete, is a bounty of 390 strips, starting in 1983, and
whosestepfatherdied37
going right up to the recently drawn end pages. How
daysaftershewasdiagnosed odd, but strangely satisfying, to see Mo and Lois in
with breastcancer,offersa
their earliest configuration, still raw and full of promdelightfulprintversionof her
award-winning
blog,37 Days. ise, and realize that there are almost 400 more pages
Yes,at its coreit boilsdown to enjoy. If you've ever missed a strip,
or indeed, whole story lines (how'd
to tropesthat havebeencooptedbythe self-helpindustry Raffi become-gasp-a
teenager?), or
(likelovingmore,trusting if you've somehow missed this entire
yourself,slowingdown)but
phenomenon, sit down with this book
there'sjust enoughwit and
and don't get up again for several hours.
wisdomandpracticaltipsto
Not only is Bechdel's wit as sharp as her
makeit enjoyable,
evenfor a
non-believer.
Dighcansegue nib, the strip just keeps getting better over
the years. As the lesbian community has
fromthe complexity
of theflea
grown, so too have the strip's characters and the story.
to a planecrashwithoutmissinga beat,wovenin with edgy Whether she's covering lesbian motherhood, political
graphicsandquotesfromthe
rallies and presidential politics, women's bookstores
likesof MarleneDietrichand
and music festivals, communal housing, bisexuality,
ToniMorrison,makingfor a
academia, multiple sclerosis, non-monogamy or even
masterfully
differentmanual
for living.[DianeAnderson- transgenderism, Bechdel has always been an astute
Minshall] and articulate inside observer of dyke culture and her
characters have always been multiracial, of different
ages, classes, sizes and abilities, even
when we in the movement couldn't
get it right in real life.
the
ple, and they're hardly gourmet or healthconscious in scope. But how can you resist
Beleaguered Butch's Meatloaf, or one for
packaged macaroni and cheese that involves
boiling the noodles, stirring in the packaged sauce with an "EBU" (essential butch utensil)
then serving it with a bagged salad-with a reminder
to readers to open the bag first! Because this is a collection, "butch bios" accompany the recipes, which are
broken down into amusing chapter categories like
"The Morning After" for breakfast, "Rabbit Food" for
salads and "Hot 'n Heavy" for meat and fish. Though
this may not be the book you reach for when you want
to host a dinner party, it's a cute present for the butch
in your life who makes the occasional mayo sandwich.
After she masters that, maybe she'll graduate to clams
with white sauce and spaghetti or even the French
TheButchCookBook,Eds.Lee onion dinner extraordinaire. There's no reason, sugLynch,
NelWardandSueHardesty gest the editors, why even the most cooking-impaired
(Teal RibbonPublications):
Do
butch couldn't offer up the "Impress Your Date with
butches cook? Yes, is the quick anWhat's Left Over in Your Fridge" omelet at least once
swer from The Butch Cook Book, or twice. After all, writes co-editor Lee Lynch in the
which does actually contain usable book's foreword, The Butch Cook Book is not meant to
recipes, such as French country pork
mock butches, but to honor them, and to "offer proof
chops and spicy lentil soup. But this
of our commonality and of our womanhood: our
compilation never takes itself too se- recipes:' Another serving of Sicilian spaghetti puttanriously. Most of the recipes are simesca, anyone? ■
butch
cook
book
58
Icurve
Q+A
Illustrator Liz Baillie
Liz Baillie is a native New Yorker and
queer-identified indie cartoonist and illustrator. Her work has appeared in numerous zines and anthologies, including Other
magazine and Mauled! In My Brain Hurts,
a brilliantly designed collection of stories,
she acutely portrays New York City teens
in search of identity, meaning and acceptance. She mines rich complexities with
empathetic wit and a sense of wonder.
Yourecentlyfinishedvolumeoneof My
BrainHurts.Howdoesit feel?
It's a mixture of elation and sadness. Kind
of like a breakup you knew was inevitable
and you still love the person, but you just
can't live with them anymore. I'm happy to
end it, in a way, because it was my first long
project, and now I know I'm capable of
starting and finishing such a thing, which
is a great feeling. I'm a little sad though
because I've been with these characters
about eight years now, and, cheesy as it
sounds, they've become a part of me.
Howmuchof yourwork is autobiographical?Arethereanycharactersor
sto ies with hichyoumost"denffy?
People frequently ask me if MBH is autobiographical and usually I will emphatically state that it is not, because it is not
literally autobiography. I'd say a good 90
to 95 percent of the stuff in MBH never
happened to me. However, the character of Kate is based upon myself at her
age-16-in
terms of the way she acts, the
way she looks, the way she interacts with
people. I was never quite as bold as her
though!
You ocusa lot on qu r outh
h
?
I was a queer youth, so I remembered how
it felt going through adolescence, never
being sure of who I was, never feeling like
there was a label that quite fit me ... and
how I was always searching for someone
like me in movies, TV, books. I created
MBH, in part, to provide something that
[the) 16-year-old me would have related
to. There are examples of queerness in
media and there are punk kids in media,
but there were no stories about queer punk
kids-or at least not that many-so I
made one.
Your o clearlyshowsan interestin
genderand sexualitytheoryand LGBT
history.WhatLGBThistoricalfigures
wouldy Ii e to ortray?
I might like to do something about Leslie
Feinberg again. Anyone who bucks traditional ideas of gender is of interest to me,
really .... Gender and sexuality [are] two
things I never get tired of exploring.
[MaryFoulk]
Dressing Up
HowtoBeUseful
MeganHustad
(Houghton
Mifflin
Company)
A wittyguideon howto
begoodat life.Writing
frompersonal
experience,MeganHustad
showsuswherenotto
gowrongandcollects
thebestadvicefrom
someof the most
successful
peoplein
history,like Andrew
Carnegie
andHelen
GurleyBrown.
[Kamala
Puligandla)
Queersexlife
MakingTrouble
'AboutFace
TerryGoldie
LynneSegal
! Eds.AnneBurtand
(Arsenal
PulpPress)
Tail)
: ChristinaBakerKline (Serpent's
: (SealPress)
' It's nota newwordto
Partmemoir,
part
I Thisanthology
delivers politicalhistory,Making' usein yourqueerstudTrouble,
byAustralian iesclass-Queersexlife
'. essaysfroma variety
a new
, activistLynneSegal, . addresses
' of femaleauthors
wayto makesense
spansdecades
and
I (including
Jennifer
continents
to tellthe , of theoriesof sexual
: Baumgardner,
theaureal
story
of
a woman , desire:throughone's
: thorof LookBothWays:
This
• Bisexual
Politics)
about · wholivedthroughthe ownexperiences.
birthof feminismand seriesof cleverlytitled
: whattheyseewhen
: theylookin themirror. whereallthoseactiv- ' essaysis a compelling
collection,
chronicling
: Oftenfunny,frequently istshaveendedup.
1
journey
for TerryGoldie's
: reflectiveandalways : Thisis a must-read
himfeministsnewandold. , to understanding
relatable.
self.[ArisaWhite]
[Rachel
Lastra]
: [Kelsey
Truman]
Often, children play dress-up to express
their identity. In 10,000 Dresses by
Marcus Ewert (Seven Stories Press),
young Bailey dreams of frocks made of
lilies and roses but everyone refuses to
look at the vivid
designs, telling
Bailey boys don't
wear dresses.
Laurel, an older
girl, recognizes
Bailey's genius.
Acclaimed fashion
designer Isaac
Mizrahi says, "I love this book! If I had
this book growing up, I might have felt
better about my dress-wearing habit."
Bailey's story and Rex Ray's imaginative
illustrations will make this this groundbreaking children's book a big hit at
home. It's an uplifting trans-positive
book about friendship, dreams and
wonder. [TaniaHammidi]
March 2009
I 59
REVIEWSSapphic Screen
Metaphorically
Speaking
1V's gone meta with queer topics. By Candace Moore
TheSense,(Heitmann
Entertainment}:
Inthis day
andage,documentaries
are
a dimea dozen.Betweenthe
popularityof realityTVand
YouTube'sgardenof endless
voyeuristic
delights,what's
realis what'sreallyhot.But
sometimes
a goodold-fashionedstorytellsa talethat's
far morepowerful.Thisis the
casewith TheSensei,a film
writtenanddirectedbyand
starringDianaLeelnosanto
(above),
a martialartsexpert
andformerstuntdoublefor
SarahMichelleGelleron Buffy
theVampire
Slayer.Thistale
of self-acceptance
andselfdefenseset in the '80shits
all the predictable
notes,but
the historicaldetailandthe
poignancy
of the vignettesare
astounding.
It's easyto forget
the panicandbigotrythat
wereprevalentin the early
yearsof theAIDSepidemic,
and,for thosewhodidn't
experience
it, andtherefore
do notknowtherewasa time
whenall homosexuals
were
considered
to bediseased,
this movieis likea kickto the
gut.[Ainsley
Drew]
60
I curve
Alan Ball respins the queer-as-monster allegory
to argue for both "vampire" and gay rights, Old
Christine takes the plunge with another woman to
sing the praises of homo-social love and The L Word
gazes into its own navel once again.
TrueBlood(HBO):Six Feet Under's mastermind
producer Alan Ball brings us a new romantic horror
serial that is distinctly imagined and convincingly
acted, despite the fact that its story line is a bit of
a Buffy rip-off. There's only one gay character, but
fears of vampires work as a not-so-subtle metaphor
for discrimination against other groups. Ir's been
two years since the invention of synthetic blood
allowed vampires to integrate with humans rather
than snacking on them. Vamps have since "come out
of the coffins;' but not everyone's convinced. The
opening credits invoke a climate of racism and homophobia using documentary-style footage, such as
a sign that reads "God Hates Fangs:' Members of
the American Vampire League and religious leaders argue on the news. Vampires are ghettoized and
have their own clubs where specialty sex workers
"service" masochistic humans with vamp fetishes.
The show revolves around Sookie (Anna Paquin), a
telepath who wants nothing more than for her small
Louisiana town to shut up. When a polite Civil War
veteran re-vamps and takes up residence in his abandoned family home, Sookie finds herself drawn to
his non-sanguine looks and gentle thoughts. With
the string of murders of women who associate with
vampires mounting, the townspeople don't exactly
take kindly to Sookie's new suitor. Her own brother
spouts hateful epithets. But since the murdered
women are strangled, not drained, the killings look
more like hate crimes than the work of vampires.
The New Adventuresof Old Christine(CBS):
This season's premiere of Julia Louis-Dreyfus'
post-Seinfeld star vehicle featured a surprise wedding between JLD's Christine, a neurotic divorcee,
and her blunt business partner Barb (played by the
hilarious lesbian comic Wanda Sykes). Christine's
proposal to her best friend-intended
to help her
from being deported-seemed
like a harmless
reference to California's legalization of gay marriage. However, Christine and Barb did really tie
the knot. While theirs is not a sexual relationship,
the liberal-hearted but often politically incorrect
show ultimately uses the idea of gay marriage to
w
~
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g
i
~
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tt
::J
u
Q+A
Traci Dinwiddie
argue for the legalization of other alternative kinship formations. What's striking is
that rather than being played like a Chuck
and Larry-style joke, the episode veered
more toward the sentimental, highlighting
the ways in which the two women already
served as each other's family. Christine
effuses, "Our marriage would be fun-we'd
hang out, we'd eat, we'd pee in front of each
other ... You are really the most wonderful
person I know ... If you leave the country,
who am I going to raise Richie with?" Since
the premiere, the gals faced life-changing
antigay discrimination and their new union
comes up in nearly every episode and is rife
with possibilities. Perhaps Christine will
have some more new adventures?
TheL Word:SeasonFive(Showtime):
The
L Word has always been particularly good at
making fun of overused lesbian tropes. Now
on DVD, season five kicks off with down-onher-luck heiress Helena trapped in a campy
rendition of Caged.The producers of The L
Wordalso recycle more material for die-hard
fans to enjoy through Jenny's film adaptation
of Les Girls,her novel based on the events
of the serial's premiere season. But this reflexivity doesn't take itself too seriously;
we're meant to take pleasure in an alternate
universe (portrayed as more "commercial")
where Nina (i.e., Tina) acts overly predatory
with Jesse (i.e.,Jenny), when we know damn
well Tina only has eyes for Bette. When Jenny
loses her director's reins on the film due to a
double-crossing personal assistant, Les Girls
takes an unfortunately straight turn. The L
Word seems to be making a claim for its own
"authenticity;' relevance and good taste, compared to an imagined sister script run amok.
Season five also sees Bette and Tina rekindle,
thus reviving those rampantly hot sex scenes.
Again, this choice plays to what the message
board scribblers have been begging for. It's
admirable how much The L Word openly
fondles itself and foregrounds its
malleability as fiction-it's so 6-:'-'!111!'1!1
bad, it's good. Someone definitely studied postmodernism
in college. ■
Mega-talented and easy on the eyes,Traci
Dinwiddie spans a wealth of lesbian fantasies as she shares the screen with Demi
Moore in Mr. Brooksand takes on the role
of the lesbian poet Renee Vivien in Jane
Clark's The Touch.We caught the starlet
after the inaugural Mixed Roots Film and
Literary Festival in Los Angeles.
"d
au • ·on o
Renee
Not quite. I felt strongly attracted and
connected to the role of Kerime.
(',
~
WheretheWater
MeetstheSky
(Camfed)
: TheAmazingTruth
: AboutQueenRaqula
(Poppoli
Pictures)
WhoDoesSheThink here!With
JoshandSara
Shel?
(MysticArtistsFilms) ' (here!TV)
w
I
I showed up dressed in my beautiful
Turkish threads and a sharpened Turkish
accent. The director took a good look at
me and said, "Honey, you're white!" I told
her I was of Syrian and Cherokee Indian
decent. I thought I had an ethnic lookyou know, bushy black eyebrows. [Laughs]
Jane said, "Let me see you for Renee."So I
came back the next day to audition for the
role of Renee Vivien in an old tuxedo and
Cl)
Twenty-three
women Thisdocumentary
tells
' thestoryof Raquela,
froma villagein
w
I
Zambiaaregivena
a Filipinotrans
w chance
,
womanwhodreams
to
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Silva]
~
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A sentiment
I'msure
: someof usarefamiliar ' onhere!Thisis a radio
with.Thisdocumentarytalkshowbroughtto
: fromdirectorPamela , thesmallscreen.It's
: TannerBollshowsthe nota newconcept,but
experience
of several JoshandSarahave
: womenwhosharethe takentheformatand
struggleof tryingto be madeit LGBT-friendly.
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It'saneye-opening ' anddowellat showandempowering
film. casingtheirguestsand
theirsmarts.[RL]
[Rachel
Lastra]
castasthe
Quite honestly, I am used to it.
ow o o d
ing?
Well, for me, this is about storytelling.
Film and television are the modern fire
circle. Back in the day people sat around
fires, told stories and got to drift off. ..
or learn a valuable lesson. My duty as
an actress is to serve the story. If I am
discouraged by the lack of well-developed
roles for women or mixed-race people,
I can always write and produce my own
stuff.[TaniaHammidi]
u
March 2009
I61
Mapping Meaning
QueerMap founder documents our history. By Kory Tran
FABLE
II OFFERS
ADVENTURE,
TREASURE
ANDLADY
LOVIN'
Goodor evil,femaleor male,
gayor straight-it's upto you
in Lionhead
Studios'fantasy
adventure
FableII,for Xbox
360.Asthe heroof Albion,
playersarefreeto bekind
or cruel,greedyor generous,
glamorous
or gluttonous.
And
thesedecisions
changeboth
howyourcharacterlooksand
howothercharacters
reactto
them.Hero-ingcanbelonely
work.Fortunately,
lesbian
marriageis far fromforbidden
inAlbion.Youcanwoothe
ladyof yourchoiceandsettle
down.(Justmakesureto
keepherhappywithcash,a
homeandevensomeoccasionalnookie.)
Thisdiabolicallyaddictivegameis readily
accessible
to all players.
With
a compelling
story,swashbucklingactionandcountless
sidequests,it's trulyepicstuff.
($60,gamestop.com)
[RachelShatto]
Caffyn Kelley does not believe lesbians should try
to be "normal:' The selridentified queer believes
that we should celebrate our differences and that
by exploring past social and cultural contexts we
can claim their power. "Queers can be an important
source of information and energy to change things;'
says Kelley. "Celebrating our capacity and history in
terms of cultural resonances of queer identity tends
to give us these powers, and not just deny and try to
normalize what it means to be queer:'
That is why Kelley founded QueerMap.com, a
website dedicated to "mapping"
out the cultural contributions
Get Wired
SheWired.com might make slow workdays go by just a little bit faster.
Launched by Regents Media, the site features columns and biogs by some
of today's most popular lesbian personalities. One of the most commented
upon blog entries from Staceyann Chin (right), "Talk Dirty to Me," has the
ladies thinking about how to use wordplay to get more, um, play while Cathy
DeBuono's video blog, What's Your Problem? offers irreverent and funny
advice on how to deal with life's ups and downs. If you can tear yourself away
from AfterEllen or Curve's site (shameless self-promotion), SheWired will have
you hooked on the latest news in lesbian culture, politics, travel, health and
lifestyle (and a sports forum called "Girls With Balls"). [ArisaWhite]
s21curve
that queers have
made in society.
QueerMap's image gallery features artwork from
around the queer world. The images date back to the
Middle Ages (inset), showing that homosexual culture has been around for hundreds of years.
In the dictionary section, she breaks down the
historical usage of words like "unnatural" and "exotic"
and examines how they stereotype queers. "I tried to
explore these stereotypes to see them for what
they really are: deep, rich archetypes;' says Kelley,
who also explores why there is such a stigma
attached to gays and lesbians. "I think that so much
of the way that power is organized is through
gender, the objectification of women. The existence of gays and lesbians poses a very profound
interrogation of the way power is organized:'
Kelley says the website is an ongoing projectshe is continually redoing the graphics and adding
more information. One of her latest additions is the
QueerMap Wiki, in which she invites LGBT writers, artists, students, "scholars" and "saints" to share
their own thoughts and suggestions.
"We can make the choice to be ordinary, to fit in
with the dominant society;' Kelley says. "But because
the unease is so profound, it's [starting to be] about
erasing differences:• ■
2
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Flying High continued from page 3 7 ___
_
I kicked my legs and yelled. Claire gave me
che thumbs up and yelled something back.
She didn't see the duct tape.
Let me go on record here to say chat duct
cape has many uses. Take MacGyver: I swear
chat guy could build a catapult out of a tooth,
pick, a spool of fishing line and, of course, a
roll of duct tape. But I didn't want my life
depending on it.
I yelled as loud as I could. Red Bandana
and Mr. Clean waved from the boat. I chink
Claire was caking more pictures, but I was
going higher so she was getting smaller. I did
deep,breaching exercises. I talked to the birds
chat flew past. I wasn't going to cry. I swear,
they left me up there for hours. The coun,
ter man said I would be at maximum height
for 15 minutes, but surely they had forgot,
ten about me. And then I could see the boat
getting bigger, and Claire getting closer, and,
eventually, the taped part of the nylon rope
disappearing onto the pulley as Mr. Clean
reeled me in.
Once my feet hit the floor of the boat,
I exhaled. After I was unhooked, I started
pulling the rope off the large spool like a
madwoman. Claire asked what the hell I was
doing. Red Bandana tried to stop me but I
gave him what must have been the look of
death and he backed away with his hands up.
I found the part of the rope that had been
taped. I held it up for everyone to see and
said, ''Are you *"$%,ing kidding met
Red Bandana and Mr. Clean took us back
to the dock.
As it turned out, neither Red Bandana nor
Mr. Clean had the clearance of the owner,
nor the common sense to use the boat that
was actually meant to cake parasailers on the
bay. I find it necessary to mention that where
the tape was placed, the rope was not broken,
only "thin:' Thin. That made me feel so much
better. The owner was Red Bandana's uncle,
and since he was out of town, Red Bandana
figured he could make a few extra bucks.
When Gram and Ted realized what the hul,
labaloo was all about, Gram hugged me tight
and Ted just shook his head. Needless to say,
I got my money back and a whole slew of gift
certificates to some crab shack on the beach.
As we drove to dinner that evening, Gram
was still going on about how we had co come
back the following year. Claire and I stared
out of our respective windows at the sun set,
ting over the water, and Ted said, "I think I'll
have a nice steak:' [JessJones]
Lovin'the 'Bush continued from page 41 ___
_
many modalities of the healing arts team. My
preferred treatment is the hydrotherapy and
massage session. It includes an aromatherapy,
infused mineral water bath, followed by a
detoxifying herbal wrap and ending with Reiki
and a massage. Other treatments include deep
tissue, hot stone massage, trigger point and
myofascial release, to name just a few.
Before bed, I spend some time in the extra,
ordinary cedar sauna, in a cabin that rests
atop the bubbling waters of a capped geyser.
The lithium from the sauna's steam puts me in
the perfect state to crawl into bed and dream
of doing it all again the next day. The rustic
cabins are geothermally heated, as are all the
buildings. And if yours doesn't include a sink
and toilet, a bathhouse is nearby. Large tents
and personal campsites are also available dur,
ing the summer and fall.
But, if getting away on your own per,
sonal retreat is not enough to get you to
Breitenbush, one of the diverse workshops
and events should do the trick.
The Journal Writing for Lesbians work,
shop occurs every spring, during the last
week in April, and the annual Women in
the Woods event draws over 100 lesbian and
gay,positive women for four days of fun and
relaxation in August.
Another event to consider is the autumn
Women,Only Weekend, which offers two
workshops, Vipassana Retreat for Women
(meditation) and Women's Renewal Weekend
(stress,reduction). Or like me, you can simply
enjoy the opportunity for a quiet personal
retreat surrounded by women.
Other
women,specific
workshops
include the Women's SoulCollage Retreat,
Womanspiric: Celebrating Our Journey
and Reflections: For Women Who Want to
Choose What Really Matters! Of course,
workshop or personal retreat, it doesn't really
matter what gets you to the 'Bush, just that
you get there. You'll be glad you did. ■
March 2009
I 63
TOPTENREASONS
WELOVE
...
LesbianCa
• hters
Revealing two fierce female competitors. By Aislinn Clevenger
You might question why someone would
step into a cage to get punched in the face.
OK, cage fighting is more than a little
violent, but the brave mixed-martial-arts
(MMA) competitors who take part in it
are highly trained athletes, both physically
and mentally, so it's easy to understand why
this professional sport is gaining popularity.
Enter Tonya Evinger and Stephanie "Mitee
Mouse" Palmer. Both are fierce female fighters. Both are lesbians who are truly fighting
in a man's world. Here's why we love lesbian
cage fighters.
1. They're trailblazers. With an illustrious past in freestyle wrestling, 27 -year-old
Evinger began training in MMA in 2004.
"I've wrestled for a long time and there's
nothing for me to use all those years of training for except fighting," Evinger explains of
her transition. "I might as well do it the legal
way and get paid for it:'
will never make the same money, never get
the same recognition;' says Evinger.
ity, either. "I was never in the closet but as
long as people are talking about it, it's more
publicity for me:'
5. They'reshowingup the guys."Of course,"
says Evinger, "the guy fighters hate that we
are out there doing their sport. I don't really
care about all that. If you're a female athlete,
you have dealt with this through every sport
and it's just another excuse for me to train
harder:'
8. They'recomingoutontop.Palmer has only
two professional fights under her belt but
she insists she doesn't fight to be the best
because she's already accomplished more than
most women ever will. "I just want to put on
a good show for the fans and supporters:'
6.They'rebuilding
community.
Fighting has also
inspired Evinger to form her own all-women's
team. "I am recruiting girls that I wrestled
with throughout the years. I will train them,
9. Fightingis nottheironlygoal."I have always
wanted to be a coach," Evinger says. "I coach
Malissa [my girlfriend) and both my brothers and they aren't getting beat up yet, so I
and mark my words right now: We will be
the best female team of elite athletes in the
world:' Evinger will also make sure that these
women get the attention they deserve by taking them to Dinah Shore Week.
must be doing something right. I guess we'll
have to see when I get my girls' team going.
I'll have to prove it to everyone:'
2. They'retough."Just because I'm a dyke,
most guys tend to think I'm stronger just
based on my appearance;' says Palmer, who
trains with Team Sturgis in Alabama and
has trained in martial arts since she was 5.
"They seem to think that I can hit harder
and take stronger punches because of it. I
just tell them if they want to hit me like a
man, don't hold any punches then:'
3. They'rehot.With toned physiques, rippling
muscles and don't-mess-with-me attitudes,
these fighters have what it takes.
4. They're lesbiansgettingairtime. Evinger,
who boasts seven professional wins and only
three losses, competes for ProElite, Inc., an
MMA organization whose EliteXC fights
air on Showtime and CBS. ProElite, unlike its competitors, including the Ultimate
Fighting Championship, took a chance on
broadcasting female fights and considers
itself the gold standard for women fighters.
But women still fall short of the big-time
success their male counterparts enjoy. "We
64
Icurve
7. They'reproud.Though being a woman in
such a violent sport generally overshadows
being a lesbian, it still makes an impact. "I
think it's actually helpful because the guys
don't really have to hold back on stuff they
say, because I'm just as bad as they are,"
Evinger says. And being in the public eye
doesn't faze her when it comes to her sexual-
10. They play other sports,too. Aside from
her two part-time jobs and training 15 to
20 hours a week, Palmer is a linebacker for
the Tennessee Valley Tigers, an all-woman
football team. Palmer has also played for the
Huntsville Renegades, and she sees football
as a positive addition to her training regime.
"It's a whole new kind of training that I
don't get from fighting. I enjoy it and I will
be sticking with it:' ■
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