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Description
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ToC Ten Powerful Lesbian Politicians by Jennifer Corday (p34); Daniela Sea by Rachel Shatto (p36); Cover: The Notorious PAM Grier by Rachel Shatto (p39); Happy Birthday to Us (p44); In Search of the Real Bali by Gillian Kendall (p46); Gone Fishin’ by Mary McGrath (p48); Sports Closeted Lesbian Surfers (p50); Dykes on Ice by Mette Bach (p52); The Orgasm Workout by Heather Robinson Cover Photo by Max Vadukal/Showtime.
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issue
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4
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Date Issued
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May 2009
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Format
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PDF/A
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Publisher
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Frances Stevens
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Identifier
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Curve_Vol19_No4_May-2009_0CR_PDFa.pdf
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extracted text
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The Ultimate Sex Workout
ZINE
Da
s
05
7
25274 80539 6
MAY 2009 VOLUME 19#4
10 Powerful Lesbian Politicians
BRID6ESTORE
the DAYunfolds
LIKE
A CHALLENGING
THAT RAISES THE
ROAD
ESSENTIAL
QUESTION: IS HIGH PERFORMANCE
IN YOUR BLOOD OR IS IT REALLY
IN YOUR TIRES?
a
j
bridgestonetire.com
ti resafety.com
1.800.807.9555
PASSION
for EXCELLENCE
FRANKLY
SPEAKING
curve
THE BEST-SELLING
MAY 2009
I
LESBIAN MAGAZINE
VOLUME 19 NUMBER 4
Publisher and Founder Frances Stevens
EDITORIAL
Editor in Chief Diane Anderson-Minshall
Managing Editor Katie Peoples
Assistant Editor Rachel Beebe
Book Review Editor Rachel Pepper
Music Review Editor Margaret Coble
Contributing Editors Julia Bloch, Victoria A. Brownworth,
Gina Daggett, Sheryl Kay, Gretchen Lee, Stephanie Schroeder,
Rachel Shatto
Copyeditor Katherine Wright
Editorial Assistants Kim Bale, Ainsley Drew, Nina Lary, Andrea
Millar, Heather Robinson
Pam Grier Kicks Ass
I can't believe it's been 19 years since the first issue of this magazine. I alwaysjoke
that I'm too young to have a child this old, but as we start heading toward turning 20, the staff is busy looking back at two decades of lesbian history. Victoria
Brownworth writes eloquently about her time writing for curve (page 32),
which made me want to give a shout-out to her and to Rachel Pepper and
Michele Fisher for being with us since the beginning. How lucky are we?
Another look back-and
a fascinating one to boot-comes
on page 39
in contributing editor Rachel Shatto's interview with actor Pam Grier. Our
time line traces Grier's rise from Air Force brat to blaxploitation star to her
recent turn on that groundbreaking Showtime hit about lesbians-a
life
that so clearly dovetailed with three overlapping civil rights movements (for
African Americans, women and gays). Grier changed America's perception of
women through her bad-ass roles and broke color barriers as the first African
American woman to grace the cover of Ms. magazine and, in doing so, she
changed the world for all of us. Most compelling, is Grier's account of how
her doctor's dire prognosis in the late
she battled stage five cancer-ignoring
'80s (he told her she would be dead in 18 months!) and fighting to live to
become the sexy 60-year-old woman she is today.
Don't miss our mini-section on not-quite-mainstream
sports. Our
editors always have their fingers on the pulse of what's hot and this year they
noticed that more lesbians were complaining about being hockey widows
than ever before, hence the handy primer (page 52) on this lesbo-friendly
sport. Another feature offers an intro to the mostly closeted world of pro
surfing. Stay tuned for an upcoming issue, though, as one of the sport's major
players is planning to come out in these very pages.
Lastly, thanks for sticking with us through these tough economic times.
Your subscriptions mean the world to us, especially now that your dollar is
being stretched a million different ways. Thank you from all of us at curve.
PUBLISHING
Advertising Sales Diana L Berry, Rivendell Media
Advertising Assistants Hannah Bolton, LaKeisha Hughes
Social Networking Lindy Shelton
ART
/PRODUCTION
Art Director Stefanie Liang
Photo Editor Hayley McMillen
Production Manager Ondine Kilker
Production Artist Kelly Nuti
Web Producer Nikki Woelk
CONTRIBUTING
WRITERS
Kathy Beige, Kelsy Chauvin, Jennifer Corday, Lyndsey
D'Arcangelo, Beren deMotier, Michele Fisher, Tania Hammidi,
Jodi Helmer, Kathi lssennan, Gillian Kendall, Kate Lacey, Charlene
Lichtenstein, Karen Loftus, Karlyn Latney, Candace Moore, Aefa
Mulholland, Alison Peters, Catherine Plato, Aimsel L. Ponti, Laurie
K. Schenden, Kristin A. Smith, Dave Steinfeld, Edie Stull, Robin
Miner-Swartz, Kyra Thomson, Jocelyn Voo, Alison Walkley, Melany
Walters-Beck
CONTRIBUTING
ILLUSTRATORS
& PHOTOGRAPHERS
Paul Michael Agular, Michelle Bart, Erica Beckman, Phil Cho,
Cheryl Craig, Tony Donaldson, Sophia Hantzes, Gabriela Hashun,
Janet Mayer, Maggie Parker, Elisa Shebaro, Katherine Streeter,
Kina Williams, Misty Winter
1550 Bryant Street, Suite 510
San Francisco, CA 94103
Phone (415) 863-6538 Fax (415) 863-1609
Advertising Sales (415) 863-6538 ext. 15 or (212) 446-6700
Subscription Inquiries (818) 286-3102
Advertising Email advertising@curvemag.com
Editorial Email editor@curvemag.com
Letters to the Editor Email letters@curvemag.com
Volume 19 Issue 4 Curve (ISSN 1087-867)() is published monthly (except for bimonthly
January/February and July/ August) by Outspoken Enterprises, Inc., 1550 Bryant St.,
Ste. 510, San Francisco, CA 94103. Subscription price: $49.95/year, $62.95 Canadian
(U.S. funds only) and $71.95 international (U.S. funds only). Returned checks will be assessed
a $25 surcharge. Periodicals postage paid at San Francisco, CA 94114 and at addttional
mailing offices (USPS 0010-355). Contents of Curve Magazine may not be reproduced in any
manner, either whole or In part, without wntten permission from the publisher. Publication of
the name or photograph of any persons or organizations appearing, advertising or listing in
Curve may not be taken as an indication of the sexual orientation of that individual or group
unless specifically stated. Curve welcomes letters, queries, unsolicited manuscripts and
artwork Include SASE for response. Lack of any representation only signifies insufficient
materials. Submissions cannot be returned unless a self-addressed stamped envelope is
included. No responsibility is ass_umedfor loss or damages. The contents do not necessarily
represent_the opinions of the editor, unless specifically stated. All magazines sent discreetly.
Subscnpt,on lnqu1nes:Please write to Curve, 1550 Bryant Street, Suite 510, San Francisco,
CA 94103, email shop@curvemag.com, or call 818-286-3102. Canadian Agreement
Curve,
Number: 40793029. Postmaster.Send Canadianaddresschangesto shop@curvemag.com,
PO Box 122, Niagara Falls, ON L2E 6$8. Send U.S. addresschangesto shop@curvemag.com,
Curve,PO Box 17138,N. Hollywood,
CA 91615-7138.Printedin the U.S.
curvemag.com
2
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>> Forward pages to friends and let
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Plus, you can watch the new Lipstick and
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Features MAY2009
34
36
39
44
46
48
50
52
54
Ten Powerful Lesbian Politicians
These women rule. Literally.
By Jennifer Corday
Daniela Sea
The multifaceted artist reflects on The
L Word, playing a trans man and punk
rock. By Rachel Shatto
The Notorious PAM
The Queen of Blaxploitation and L Word
star Pam Grier gives us the scoop on life
as an icon. By Rachel Shatto
Happy Birthday to Us
We've hit our 19th year and to celebrate
we look back on some of the fabulous
women we've covered.
In Search of the Real Bali
Forget the resorts and hit these authentic
spots. By Gillian Kendall
Gone Fishin'
lxtapa, Mexico: offers woman vs. wild
adventure. By Mary McGrath
Sports
Closeted Lesbian Surfers
Hawaii is home to a slew of lesbian surfers, but why do so few come out? By
Gillian Kendall
Dykes on Ice
Queer female hockey fans and players dish
on their love of the game. By Mette Bach
The Orgasm Workout
We've got a workout that will have you
feeling the heat. By Heather Robinson
page
34
"I now have a different perspective
just from doing The L Word. It has
just been the most magnificent
experience."Pam Grier >>
4
Icurve
page 39
Departments MAY2009
A..& •• :--
24
2
10
12
14
21
17
20
22
27
64
Frankly Speaking
Letters
Contributors
26
28
This Is What a Lesbian Looks Like
Open Studio
Scene
30
AstroGrrl
Lipstick & Dipstick
I Tried It
32
Top Ten Reasons We Love ...
56
15
18
6
I curve
Curvatures
Emerge makes for a great party this spring,
a court ruling may open doors to discrimination and great undies for butch gals.
Celebrity Gossip
LiRo on the rocks again? Tila Tequila having
a kid? Thank God for Beth Ditto.
58
60
62
Relationships: Have a happy beard marriage, plus what femmes wish you knew.
Health: We take a new safe-sex product
for a test drive.
Money: The skinny on a lesbo-friendly
doggie day care franchise.
Dyke Drama
How to spot faux lesbians before the
drama begins.
Politics
Do we still need a queer press? Of course!
-
. . .
Music: We let a few boys into the club
house with bands like girl-fronted Straight
Line Stitch. Lea Delaria rocks.
Books: Emma Donoghue and Thea
Hillman wow us with The Sealed Letter and
lntersex. We grill Susan Gabriel.
Film: Queer zombies in Otto. Power
couple Shamim Sarif and Hanan Kattan
take us through their filmmaking process.
Tech: How to get out of a sticky text
message. Plus hot cell phone covers.
Only in San Francisco"
You'llhave so many new storiesto tell, you'll need proof. Find out what's new in SFat onlyinsanfrancisco.com/gaytravel
gay.
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COMING
UP
From the Editor
It's probably no
surprise that the
Curvettes are big
text messagers.
We're often texting
each other with
news tidbits from
pop culture to
Prop. 8 (I think I
texted contributing
editor Rachel
Shatto at 2 a.m. one time, flush
with excitement, to tell her that
two girls on Rock of Love made
out-now
I see that news could
have waited until the morning). I
use texting to expedite things too
•
(i.e. when I run into a writer who
wants to know what happened
to her now 6-month-old soliloquy
on cats, I immediately text
Sheetal Sheth
The actor (above) who wooed audiences-and sultry Bollywood sensation
Lisa Ray-in/ Can't Think Straight takes us behind the scenes of one of
this year's steamiest lesbian romantic comedies.
•
Rejecting the Cookie Cutter
"I'm not your average model," says Lucy Andrews (right),
whose budding career hasn't stopped her from being
herself-from her post-punk 'do to her sexuality.
managing editor Katie Peoples).
But, I've come to see the pitfalls
of texting now that it, along with
Facebook and Twitter, are my
primary forms of communication.
I'm often texting back the wrong
folks, accidentally posting
embarrassing info on my
Facebook wall and telling all the
wrong people what I want to do
to them that very night. Thank
goodness for Jenny Lovell's tips
on surviving text blunders on
page 62. Now tell me about your
worst text blunders-I
can't wait
to hear I'm not alone in texting
"I <3 U" to a crazy old boss!
Diane Anderson-Minshall
Editor in Chief
s I curve
•
Foreign Reads
The scintillating German novel Wetlands caught our eye
this month (see page 58), but we've got a bevy of mustreads from foreign shores on our list. Get reading at curvemag.com.
Are Lesbian Teens at Risk?
Yes, says Elizabeth Saewyc, author of a
University of British Colombia study on
queer teen sexual health (see page 26).
According to her lesbian, gay and
bisexual youth engage in more risky
sexual behavior than their peers,
leading to higher rates of sexual
transmitted diseases and even
pregnancy. Read the full interview at
curvemag.com.
19 Years of Exclusives
To celebrate our B-day we dug deep and
pulled out the hottest celebrity exclusives
we've had over the years (including one with
Margaret Cho, pictured right). The
highlights are on page 44, but the
full articles are on curvemag.com.
Check out our ongoing coverage of the
California same-sex marriage debate
on curvemag.com.
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May 2009
I9
LETTERS
it takes to weather these economic
times-and someday we might just
show up in your neck of
the woods with sub cards in
hand!
Takes Me Back ...
Hard Times
Thanks for the passion and effort you have
put toward this publication over the years.
We are writing to you because we saw the
"Hunkering Down" letter from the curve
founder ["Frankly Speaking," Vol. 19 #1]
and we would certainly be saddened beyond
words if your publication went
down in these hard economic
times. Our subscription is already
arranged through
December
2009, so we were thinking of
other things we could do to help.
There are two well-attended gaylesbian bars in the Cincinnati,
Ohio, area (Adonis and the Yadda Club)
and we wanted to offer to take posters,
subscription sign-up cards, whatever you
have or recommend, to those establishments to help propel subscription readership in our area. Hang in there, curve!
- Laura and Jenn Dougherty, Cincinnati
Editor's Note: It's readers like you who keep
us kicking. Don't worry, we'll do whatever
I
I was browsing through
your website when I came
across the famous people
section. Then I saw her
name: Cris Williamson. I
was a student at Syracuse
University in upstate New
York, and in 1973, at a small
bar-pub on campus, I saw
Williamson
perform. I'd
never heard of her, but she
was great. The next act was
Loudon Wainwright III. I
am glad to hear she is still
performing
and
doing well. Thanks
for showcasing her
on your site.
- Peter, via email
This was nothing like I thought the
final season would be. I wanted them
to go back to the really good
stuff from seasons one, two
and three-those
characters and story lines (and the
How's your economic
gratuitous sex scenes!).
outlook for 2009?
- lUV2bOWL21
Poll
49%
Well, I am a Jenny fan. If
she had not been on The L
Word it would have been
very boring to watch. Her
26%
I'm lookingintoorgansales.
character is almost the only
one who has developed
14%
and· stirred up the very
2009is lookinggoodfrom
boring and predictable life
whereI'm standing.
of the other characters ... !
11%
must also say thanks for
Recession?
bringing us The L Word. It
Whatrecession?
is amazing that they came
through and made it. And
According
to a curvemag.com
poll
also, thanks to them we
have gotten more visibility
in film, music, TV, etc.
-Anonymous
I'm makingsomecuts,
but overallI'll beOK.
The L Word Online Debate
This was a very disappointing season, with little romance and another crazy
round of personality transplants. Seriously,
Ilene Chaiken [creator of The L Word] is an
Aaron Spelling knockoff.
-Anonymous
It's so painful to watch Shane and Jenny
together. I spent the whole hour yelling at
the TV.
-Anonymous
RANDOM
QUOTES
FROM
LETTERS
WEAREN'T
RUNNING
... If the mother wants a boy and physical prize is a girl the
child will develop female-male transgender (lesbian) tendencies. Their actions are mind over matter to
satisfy a mother'slove. -lee Harvard Zesch, las Vegas
Since the Texas Department of Criminal Justice doesn't pay their prisoners for our slave labor, it would also
be nice to get a free subscnpt1on to curve to share with everyone here! -Paula Witherspoon, Iowa Park, Texas
10
Icurve
"This was nothing like I
thought the final season
of The L Word would
be. I wanted them to go
back to the really good
stuff from seasons one,
two and three-those
characters and story
lines (and the gratuitous
sex scenes!)."
Snail Mail by Numbers
Because some people care
enough to send a letter ...
1%
Letters written in rainbow colors
2%
Letters
with
biblical
quotes
1%
Strange and
disturbing
"press
releases"
1%
Notices from
prisons informing
us that they've
censored our
content for the
inmates
LUCIE
BLUE
TREMBLAY
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KOCH
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MEANS
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MAHAN
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CLARK
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CASSELLA
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FORMORE
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DESIGNBY
STUKPDESI01'.COM
CONTRIBUTORS
'Tm always dropping books in the bathtub. I can't look my
librarian directly in the eye because I'm embarrassed;'
says editorial assistant AinsleyDrew,who reviewed Simply
Audiobooks' books~on~CD rental service ("Listen Between
the Lines;' page 59). "This kind of service is something I can
definitely use:' Writing the piece introduced her to a whole
new way of obtaining reading material. "I hope that one day
people will be able to rent a book of mine;' she jokes. Drew
also works as half of the copywriting team known as Ministry
oflmagery and writes bi~weekly blog,Jerk Ethic.
While she's a fan of The Wrestler, (see her review on page 60)
media critic and longtime curve film review editor Candace
Mooredescribes herself as "constitutionally incapable of watch~
ing Mickey Rourke get staple gunned:' As a child she stapled
her own thumb and was duly fascinated by those dark little red
holes. Despite this youthful interest in masochism, Moore still
watches certain scenes from between her fingers. A Ph.D can~
didate in cinema and media studies at UCLA, she focuses on
representations of queer women in TV. She has articles pub~
lished or forthcoming in CinemaJournal, GLQ; ProductionStudies:Cultural Studies of Media
Industries, TelevisingQueer Women and Reading the L Word: Outing ContemporaryTelevision.
"I wanted to be famous, but I guess I wanted a hysterectomy
more;' says columnist MicheleFisher,who became a civil servant
in order to get health insurance. ''After the surgery, I realized that I
had become soft. I had latched onto the government teat and I was
unable to let go:' After discovering that she'd traded her dreams
for a dental plan and pension, Fisher decided it was time to get
real job, so she started writing for curve. "My mom was thrilled.
Now, she calls me to tell me how funny Ellen is:'
We're Still Putting Out
I
I
Asusual,theCurvettes
have
beenbusybeesoverthe last
few months.Ourmulti-talented
musiceditorMargaretCoble
tookpartin President
Obama's
inaugural
artshow,Manifest
Hope,inWashington,
D.C.last
January.ChecktheNewOrleans-based
artist
outat www.artbymags.com
...Therehavebeen
severalnotabledevelopments
onthe literary
front:Contributing
writerJodiHelmeris celebratingthe publication
of herbookTheGreen
Year:
365SmallThingsYouCanDotoMakea
BigDifference
(www.us.penguingroup.com)
...
Twoof ourcontributing
writersofferupcomingof-agenovels-Lyndsey
D'Arcangelo's
The
Crabapple
Tree(www.alphaworldpress.com)
andA.J.Walkley's
QueerGreer
(www.wordclay.com)
... Editorin
chiefDianeAnderson-Minshall
penned
theintroduction
to Lisa
lannucci's
EllenDeGeneres:
A
Biography
(www.greenwood.
com)... Contributing
writer
MyraLavenue
foundedTwo
MomsandtheOregon-based
groupParenting/
Pregnant
Lesbians
of Portland
(akaPLOP),
the
latterof whichalreadyhas150familiesinvolved(www.ploppdx.wordpress.com).
Youcan
findTwoMomsat www.momslikeme.com
...
Finally,in a morerisqueturnof events-andafter sixyearsof searingonlinepresence
at www.
nofauxxx.com-queer
porndirectorandcurve
contributor
Courtney
Trouble
is celebrating
the
releaseof herfirstfull-lengthno-holds-barred
DVD,Roulette.
ANNIVERSARY PHOTO CREDITS PAGE 44 NAOMI KALTMAN/SHOWTIME (HAILEY) POWER UP (SHIMIZU) RHEA ANNA
(DIFRANCO) ALI GOLDSTEIN/MSNBC (MADDOW) PAUL MICHAUD/SHOWTIME (SHAHI) GREG GAYNE/FOX (JONES)
COURTESY OF HRT (RAY) AUSTIN YOUNG (CHO) DJAMILLA ROSA COCHRAN (ETHERIDGE) SOPHIA WALLACE (CHIN)
JERI HEIDEN (LANG) HANK HOFFMAN (TAORMINO)
CURVATURES
CU[~atU[8S~---.--Party for a Cause
If you're craving a big lesbian event this spring but
can't make it to Dinah Shore or AquaGirl, check
out Philadelphia's premier annual women's party,
Emerge, which takes place May 1- 3 as a part of the
weeklong Equality Forum.
Emerge provides a night of revelry with purpose:
The funds raised are donated to LGBT organizations
in need. Emerge's sponsor, the Sapphire Fund, aims
to support the efforts of organizations that contribute
to the health and overall well-being of LG BT organizations in the Philadelphia metro region. This year,
beneficiaries include Foyer of Philadelphia, which
'
•B
works with LGBT homeless youth; the Mazzoni
Center, which is Philadelphia's LGBT health center;
and the Adoption Center of Delaware Valley, which
focuses on helping same-sex couples adopt.
This year, Emerge's entertainment is geared toward
showcasing the region's hot lesbo-queer DJs, with
DJ Cozmic Cat headlining. The action happens at
Transit Nightclub, where the ample dance space
ensures an abundance of hot ladies on the dance
floor. Corinne Thornton, one of the lead organizers,
says that Emerge is "the more urban version of [other
lesbian] parties:' Meaning there may not be a pool or
palm trees, but Emerge aims to be an "inclusive party
that makes all people feel welcome;' says Thornton.
That feeling of openness is what drew Cozmic
Cat back for a second year, after wowing the crowd
last year. "What makes the event so special for
me is definitely the organizers ... Last year's party
was an amazing, multifaceted, three night affair.
I've never met such a fantastic, hardworking, and
enthusiastic crew so dedicated to the cause. They
made me feel so much like I'm part of something
wonderful and huge, and that I'm very proud to
support:' [MarcieBianco]
v Bo o s
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26%
Number of
curvemag .com
readers who think
Lara Croft is the
sexiest superhero.
The Tomb Raider
babe beat out stiff
competition: Xena,
Catwoman, Wonder
Woman, Tank Girl
and all the chicks
from The X-Men.
the rundown
Utah's Mormons might not be supporters of LGBT rights, but their governor
Gov.
JonHuntsman
Jr.drew
is. Republican
sharp criticism when he came out in support of three gay rights bills in February
and stated that he supports civil unions ...
A recent survey by Harris Interactive
found that LGBT
consumers
are still traveling despite the economic downturn. Hets
are cutting back more, which may explain
why they are often so darn cranky... Paris
Hiltoncontinues to work her way down
her "attention whore to-do list"and can
now mark off"make
out with a hot model
in public:' The heiress
was seen nuzzling
model Cheyenne Tozzi
as they traveled in
Australia. Not to be
outdone, British pop
star LilyAllen(left)
admitted to "snogging"
lesbian identical twins in the February issue
of Gay Times... An Iranianlesbian
has been
granted asylum by the U.K. after her girlfriend was arrested and sentenced to death
by stoning. She was denied asylum last
year, but her case was reconsidered at the
urging of a high-profile campaign involving
gay rights groups, members of Parliament
and British media ... A member of a blooddrinking
vampire
cult and her girlfriend
have been sentenced to life in prison for
the sexually motivated murder of their
teenage housemate in Australia. Suddenly
your roomie doesn't seem so bad after all...
Like the writer it was named for, the Oscar
WildeBookshop
(below right) is coming to
an untimely end. The Greenwich Village
institution, believed to be the oldest gay
and lesbian bookstore
in the country has
closed its doors ...
r ::
,
.
,
Chennai, India,
recently launched its
first dedicated lesbian
which was
helpline,
inspired by the suicide of a lesbian couple
last year. Finally,some help for ladies who
love ladies on the subcontinent ... Poet
Laureate
KayRyan's
wife of 30 years,
Carol Adair, passed away in January.
[Heather
Robinson]
Discrimination Passes the Test
After being expelled from California Lutheran High School in 2005 for
lesbian behavior, two girls sued the school on grounds of discriminationand lost. In January, a California Court of Appeals upheld the decision that
the private religious school is not subject to anti-discrimination laws that
would have protected the students, whose names have not been released.
"It's a disaster;' says Kirk D. Hanson, the lawyer for the girls. "It's a
disaster not just for sexual orientation but also for anyone of any class. Any private school can
discriminate on any basis they want, whether it's sexual orientation, medical disability, skin
color or anything else. It's horrible:' Content found on MySpace tipped officials off to the
intimate relationship between the girls.
"This school's core purpose is religious education;' says John McKay, the attorney for the
high school. 'i\llowing them to attend this school would be the same as walking around
handing out pamphlets that say God doesn't exist. Lutherans believe homosexuality is a sin:'
Parents send their children to the school to be educated in an atmosphere consistent with
their religious beliefs, McKay says. Hanson argues that this ruling could have a damaging
effect on the girls and other LGBT youth.
"It tells them they're not legitimate, that something is wrong with them;' he says. The girls
are currently attending college and Hanson says a petition to the California Supreme Court
is in the works. Thankfully, this position is not representative of all Lutherans. Herchurch
of San Francisco, for example, belongs to the progressive Evangelical Lutheran Church in
America and has LGBT pastors and leaders.
"It saddens me every day that within much of Christianity, homophobia coupled with
patriarchal and domination structures and practices leads to all kinds of forms of oppressions, as well as beliefs and systems that perpetuate them;' says Herchurch pastor Stacy
Boom. [Kimberly
Bale]
The Gaydar
Here's a taste of lesbians in pop culture this month.
Who missed the mark and who was right on target?
neOpie'sshowat
genheim-weloved
hercontemporary
hotosstraddling
the
.tt~~r.,t
16
Icurve
Prop.8 donorsask
foranonymity.
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I
SCENE
1 Revelers at Lavendermagazine's First Thursday party, at the
W Hotel, Minneapolis 2 The Carolina Storm's Angela Walter
goes for the end zone 3 Face off at the Kelly McGillis flag foot~
ball championship in Key West 4 Wanda Sykes speaks at the
Come Wearing White, Leave Seeing Red rally in Sacramento,
Cali£ 5 L Wordstar Rose Rollins introduces her mom to the
crowd at curve's L Word party 6 Guests at an L Word pre~
rnier in Minneapolis 7 Contortionist, Blaze, at Portland, Ore:s
Super Queer Lusty Fun Xtravaganza 8 Lindsay Lohan at the
premiere of Filthand Wisdom 9 Attorney Gloria Allred (left)
and lesbian activist Robyn Tyler at the Sacramento, Cali£ rally
10 Filmmaker Liliana Hueso speaks at San Francisco's Reels
of Resistance event 11 San Francisco premier of Straight/aced,
a film tackling gender stereotypes amongst teens
May 2009
I 17
LESBOFILE
Fromthe Heart
The celeb action keeps us guessing this month. By Jocelyn Voo
told Usmagazine.com, 'i\.t this point in my
life, I wouldn't say one way or another what
my preference is sexually:'
Rumors started circulating after O'Day
brought a woman to an industry launch party
in December and then referred to her as her
girlfriend. Earlier that month, O'Day brought
another woman to a New York party.
"The only thing I'm looking for in life is incredible passion and honest love... no matter
what options are on the table;' she said. 'i\.ll I
really operate on is the way I feel in my heart
when it comes to love:'
KissandTell
BiggerReallyIs Better
Child'sPlay
High-fashion magazines like Vogue are known
for the wafer-thin supermodels and celebrities that grace their covers. But for U.K. stylist Katie Grand, former editor in chief of the
now-shuttered British style tome Pop, bigger
is better. So who should grace the cover of
the first issue of Grand's new fashion glossy,
Love, other than The Gossip
frontwoman, BethDitto?Sure,
it's not the same as when she
posed nude on the cover of
NME in 2007, but it sends a
clear message to fashionistas
on this side of the pond (hint:
eat a sandwich already!).
According to Usmagazine.com,
everyone's favorite bisexual, Tila
Tequila,proclaimed her intention to follow in the footsteps of
Madonna and Angelina as far
as expanding her family goes.
"I definitely want to adopt a
boy;' she said, but admitted that
she wanted to make "at least
another billion dollars" before
then, so she could spend all her time focused
on him. We'd suggest spending some of that
dough on a nanny. Consider the one time she
acted as caretaker. It didn't end so well.
"I had a dog, but I had to give him to [my]
best friend, because he did not like to travel
at all;' she said.
Maybe starting off with something
simpler would be a better idea ... maybe a
houseplant ...
Special"Friends"
Leave it to Ellen DeGeneresto sneak a
Prop. 8-laced joke into an awards show. This
past January at the 35th Annual People's
Choice Awards, she took home the trophy
for Best Talk Show Host in stride, giving a
verbal nod to everyone during her acceptance
show ... including "my roommate, Portia,
thank you very much, as well:'
18
I curve
AnotherCelesbian
"ComesOut"
Step aside, LindsayLohan.We've got a new
switch-hitter on our hands! AubreyO'Day,a
former singer in the girl group Danity Kane,
Even though she's previously been married
to musician Chris Robinson and romantically linked with Owen Wilson and Lan~e
Armstrong, in January KateHudson
heard rumors that she had been macking on a woman, which the actor heartily denied.
'i\. girlfriend called me and
said, i\.re you making out with
girls now?' I was like, 'What are
you taking about? No, no, no;"
she told Us magazine. "Strictly
boys for me!"
Damn. Now, mom Goldie
Hawn ...
LiRoSplit?
Consider the LiRo love boat
run ashore. Word on the street was that the
twosome was already in couples therapy
to nurse their relationship back to health.
However, according to TMZ.com, Lindsay
were heard
Lohanand girlfriend SamRonson
arguing 'til 4 a.m. in late December, culminating in the sound of shattering glass and
Ronson screaming, "If you're gonna break
things, get out of my house:'
Rumors of a split deepened as Lohan was •
seen cavorting around both coasts with Sean
Penn, sans Ronson. But Lohan denies every- :
thing, writing on her MySpace blog, "We did •
NOT break up;' adding that media and gossip
outlets should get their stories, er, straight.
She Said
, pride
T film fests,
ures & more!
Book Online: DAMRONVACATIONS.COM
or Call today: 1.888.850.6585
ASTROGRRL
Go for the Gusto
Venus and Mars rub-a-dub and expand the love all through May. By Charlene Lichtenstein
Taurus
(April21-May21)
Sex:You have a secret admirer who may make herself
known to you this May. Of course some things are
better left romantically mysterious. Career:Hidden
enemies are discovered, disarmed and conquered
at work. Now that you have them where you want
them, what will you do with them? How about corporate Siberia?
Gemini(May 22-June 21)
Sex: Girlfriends get you into all sorts of mischie£
Good thing too-you are getting far too staid and
conventional. Nothing that a little taste ofleather and
chains can't cure. Career:Mentors at work give you a
helping hand and you are very grateful. Whether it
leads to more is up to you.
Cancer(June22-July 23)
Sex: If love finds you in the supply closet, let the
paper clips fall where they may-just as long as they
SEEING THROUGH don't fall into the lap of the big boss. Career:You can
THE BULL be as aggressive as you need to be to advance this May.
It might be nice to be on top and flex your muscles.
Taurusthe Bullis an earthy
womanguidedby insatiable Harder! Harder!
appetitesthatstriveto beamply
fulfilledwhetherit's for love, Leo(July 24-Aug. 23)
companionship,
lust,food,drink Sex:Exotic love waits for you in some far-off land.
or just plainday-to-dayliving. How many nooks and caves will you have to explore
Sheis generous,
genialandgor- before you find her? Career:
You are tempted to reveal
geousandblessedwith exquisite a few corporate secrets in order to solidify your positasteandstyle.Ofcourse,there tion. Loose lips sink ships, Lioness. Ready, aim, fire!
arethoseafflictedtypesthat
bucktheTaurean
trendand Virgo(Aug.24-Sept. 23)
spendtheirdaysdiningonfrozen
Sex:There is something about you that has tongues
fish sticks,cannedravioliand
wagging. Seductive May leads you into temptation.
Thunderbird,
buttheymayjust
Lucky girl. Career:Use your powers of persuasion to
bewaitingfor the rightdinner
get
what you want from the powers that be, so you
invitation.Generally,
thesegals
knowhowto livewell andonly can become the power behind the throne.
aspireto haveenoughmoneyto
supporttheirlavishlifestyles,
a randygirlfriendandstill
havea bit left in the
bankfor a rainyday.
Libra(Sept.24-0ct. 23)
Sex: May offers you a choice-continue
current
relationships or seek new ones. Who loves you,
baby? You will soon find out. Career:Business partners offer you a happy jolt. Let's hope it has to do
with increased revenues and not the electric bill.
Scorpio(Oct.24-Nov.22)
Sex: Your attention to exercise will produce some
20
Icurve
impressive results. Now impress her by pressing her.
Career:
You are especially productive this May. Is it all
a pretense to attract attention? Does it really matter?
Sagittarius
(Nov.23-Dec.22)
Sex:Get out and make the party rounds this May.
Romance is in the air. Do I smell something burningr
Oh, let's hope so. Career:Life takes a busy, stressful
turn and you are apt to overdo, whether at work or
play. I would suggest the latter, though.
Capricorn
(Dec.23-Jan.20)
Sex:There is no need to wander terribly far afield
to find the "who" and "what:' The question is "when''
and "where:' And the fun will be in the "how:' Career
There is the temptation to work from home this May.
Avoid the temptation unless you can at least pretend
to work.
Aquarius
(Jan.21-Feb.19)
Sex:Whisper sweet nothings in her ear and she will
follow you anywhere. Of course you may not want
her to do that. Sprinkle sugar in her bowl instead.
Career:
Your opinions are strong and compelling. But
yelling them will not bring the decision makers to
your side. Try subtle threats instead.
Pisces(Feb.20-March20)
Sex:Love for sale? Forget that. Go for the lavishly
expensive love that provides champagne baths and
truffles this May. Career:Use your power judiciously
to make a corporate move. When your power wanes,
try a cautious bribe or two.
Aries(March21-April20)
Sex: You are particularly sexy and alluring all
through May. Package it and sell as much of it as you
can before you go on a deeply discounted summer
sale. Career:Start new work projects immediately
before you lose interest. Lambda Rams have some
great ideas and now have the charisma to ignite
them. Kaboom!
AstrologerCharleneLichtensteinis the author ofHerscopes: A Guide to Astrology
for Lesbians. Get more at thestarryeye.
com or go to her blogat thestarryeye.typepad.com.
OPENSTUDIO
Clockwise from left: Pencil Reindeer, Red Dress;
Lipstick Blue Swirl; Glasses, Bic Pen
The Embodimentof Loss
A multimedia artist finds meaning in the mundane. By Anna Lonnberg
Mary-Cecile Gee began making fine artwork 20 years ago. She started out
with graphics and illustrations, but came into her own when she began creating three-dimensional art. She attended the Art Center in Los Angeles,
and there she discovered that her art was unconventional in that it was
an unusual marriage of concept and medium. She often broke free of the
school's traditional curriculum, which was focused around painting. She
experimented a lot, and at one point even made an ice sculpture in response
to an illustration assignment.
When her mother died, about 10 years ago, Gee's art shifted to focus on her mother's influence and how she finds her mother in the mundane articles she left behind:
lipstick, hair curlers-even cigarette butts. Though her mother is gone, Gee finds that
her personality is still present in these objects.
Gee's most recent body of work includes some of them. Entitled FieldEquations:An
(Accidental)Self-Portrait,it is made up of sculptures designed to hold the mold of her
mother's beauty products. The lipstick sculptures even have the imprint of her mother's
lips, which, according to Gee, give her mother a form of speech. She says the sculptures
are also influenced by Einstein's equations that describe the curvatures of space and time
produced by a gravitational field. Gee sees the equations as a metaphor for her show.
"That was a great metaphor for me because I was interested in the idea that one of
the ways that astronomers were looking for other planetary systems was to look out
into space, and they oftentimes could not see the star that was the center of the solar
system, but they could see a planet, or some bit of a planet, that was orbiting around
something and was being influenced gravitationally by something bigger than itself that
the astronomer couldn't see:•
This relationship was a perfect model for Gee to find her mother through her
mother's imprint on everyday objects. Her body-centric theme of loss will continue in
future projects, which could possibly include digital media.'i\s long as we're mortal, and
nobody's figured out how to get us out of that bind, bodies are really interesting
because, as expansive as our minds are, our brains are still organic and our brains are
still bodies, and they die;• says Gee. "These limitations of having a body are a fantastic
feature, so I think I'm still really interested in things that come out of the dialogue of
having a
ADVICE Lipstick & Dipstick
Putting It on Display
DearLipstickandDipstick:My girlfriendnever
treats me like I am her girlfriendin public.
Whenwe're out, she almostignoresme. She
is out of the closet,so that's not the issue.
Behindcloseddoors,she constantlytells me
howmuchI meanto her andthat she doesn't
knowwhat shewoulddo withoutme, but the
secondwe are aroundother people,I don't
exist.Sheignoresmeandoftenflirtswithother
women,andthat makesme angry.It's driving
meinsane.What'sthedeal?- Snubbed
in San
Francisco
Dipstick:Maybe she is one of those butches
who feels like she has to pretend she doesn't
need you in public.
Lipstick:Really? That actually happens?
Dipstick:It does, sadly, and let me be the first
to tell Snubbed's girl that she'll get further
if she's more gendewomanly. She obviously
hasn't been schooled properly and may need
me to come down there and teach her a
thing or two.
Lipstick:Don't buy your plane ticket, Dip, as
period.""There'sa Buffymarathonon."She's
confronted
meaboutit, butI'm notsurehowto
admitwhatI'mfeeling.She'stakennoticeof my
weightgain,andasfarasI know,she'sindifferent.
- NoBuff,NoMuff
Dipstick:Body issues. All women have them_
and they suck! Start working on yourself
and you'll start to feel a little better. A while
ago I read that Hillary Clinton made time
to work out every day. I figure if a woman
as busy as our Secretary of State can find
time to do it, so can I. It doesn't have to be
a big three-hour gym circuit class. Just get
out for a brisk walk, a bike ride, a half-hour
on the treadmill. The next thing you need
to do is put those feelings aside and just
have sex. When your girl comes on to you,
Dear Lipstickand Dipstick:My girlfriendis even if you're not in the mood, say yes. See
the most amazing,intuitivewomanI've ever what happens. Most likely when she starts
encountered.
However,recent circumstancesto touch you here and there, you'll suddenly
posea threatto ourrelationship.
Whenwe met, get in the mood. And what's going to make
I wasa workout-aholic,
vegetarian
healthfreak you feel better about your body than an
whofit nicelyintomygirlfriend's
arms.Sexwas orgasm or two? Try it.
wonderfuland I was her girl-toy.But several
monthsawayat collegecatalyzeda significant Lipstick:If you don't face this-and
fastweightgainandnowI'm repulsed
by mybody. you'll lose you girlfriend, No Muff. I'm not
I frequently
declinesex."I'm tired.""I'm onmy talking about hitting the gym or joining
I suspect what's going on here may be something else. Ready, Snubbed? She's just not
that into you (if only I'd written a book with
the same name). Now hold on, before you
grab your crying rag, hear me out. There's
also a chance she's one of those people who
is uncomfortable with public displays of
affection, although I hardly think looking
at your girlfriend when she's speaking is a
PDA. Either way, confront her and if she
doesn't shape up, it's time to reconsider this
relationship. My crystal ball isn't looking
hopeful about your current gal-but be encouraged, it also sees someone in your future
who will not onlx give you gobs of attention,
but also kisses on the train.
some overpriced weight-loss program. I'm
talking about restoring your self-esteem.
A fuller figure is nothing to be ashamed
of and your girlfriend, no doubt, loves you
unconditionally. Well, almost. I suspect
there is one condition: You must let her
inside. (I was speaking emotionally and
psychologically, but now I'm thinking physically,too.) You've got a double whammy here,
as the top two reasons that couples break up
are first, massive breakdowns in communication, and second, no more nookie. Trust
your girlfriend and love her enough to let
her in. Also, check out Paul Campos' book
The Diet Myth: Why America'.s Obsession
with Weight Is Hazardous to Your Health. It -
will help you start changing the way you love
yourself and see your body.
:J
--'
--'
DearLipstickand Dipstick:I feel lonelyin my
relationship.
I'm a 22-year-oldfemmewith a
I
26-year-oldbutchpartner.We got marriedin a.
22 I curve
Just Between Girlz~
"My girlfriend never treats me like I am her
girlfriend in public. When we're out, she
almost ignores me. Behind closed doors,
she constantly tells me how much I mean
to her, but the second we are around other
people, I don't exist. What's the deal?"
Californiain July. We're fightinga lot lately Dipstick:Maybe so, but what I want to know
and are not havingsex. She says she's just is what gives with the guilt about looking
not up for it. I don'tknowif we aren't having at naked women? There's nothing wrong
sex becausewe're fightingor if we're fighting with porn, for you, your lover, your mother
becausewe aren't havingsex. In the begin- or anyone else. As long as it doesn't become
ning,we had sex and it was earth-shattering. addictive, watching porn, reading erotica and
Recently,I've startedlookingat lesbianporn.I viewing X,rated movies can all be part of a
usuallyhateporn.My ex usedto lookat it and healthy sex life. Too often we depend on our
it hurtme deeply.I'd be reallyupsetif I found partners to be our best friend, our confidante,
out my currentgirlfriendwas lookingat porn, a sexy lover, personal chef and co,parent to
too.AfterwatchingpornI feel guiltyandmore our children. No one person can meet all
lonelyanddepressed
thanbefore.Pleasehelp. your needs all the time. When your lover isn't
up for cooking, you order out. When she's
- Miserablein MapleGrove
not up for sex, watch porn and masturbate.
Hell, watch with your partner, too. And when
Lipstick:I wonder if this 1s No Muff's
you're
through, tie her hands to the bedpost
girlfriend?
with a silk scar£ sit on her knees and talk
until she hears your concerns.
"
Lipstick:Did you ever see that fight scene
in Mr. and Mrs. Smith when Brangelina are
trying to kill each other and suddenly sex
MYDREAM
COUPLE
breaks out? Sounds like you guys need to
TinaFeyand H DaraTorres
trash the house, just like they did. One ques,
AmyPoehler • andHillaryClinton
tion: Why won't she have sex with you? You
didn't say. Maybe she's being lazy or letting
BESTNICKNAME
I EVERHAD
work get in the way. Or perhaps it's some,
Vagina Girlboy/Boygirl
thing more serious, like dealing with sexual
abuse issues. Find yourself a good therapist
URBAN
LEGEND
I WISHWERE
TRUE
and dig into what's keeping you at each oth,
Youcancookan H JamieLeeCurtis
er's throats (you should be there with your
eggbetweentwo
is intersex
tongue, not a razor blade). While you're at
cell phones
it, see the counselor on your own to get over
IFI WEREN'T
ANADVICE
COLUMNIST, your issues around porn, as they're adversely
I WOULD
BE
affecting your sexual health, too. Shame is
an awful aphrodisiac.
!dip~c
H
LawyerH Bicyclemessenger
FAVORITE
SEXALBUM
So Tonightthat 8 Maxwell'sUrban
I MightSee,
HangSuite,
MazzyStar
Maxwell
Is your girlfriend a slob? Want to get back
into the dating scene?
Watch new episodes of
The Lipstick & Dipstick
Show at curvemag.com.
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ADVICE Relationships
Avoidin the CloseShave
Five ways to keep your beard marriage from getting too hairy. By Kate Lacey
is nothing more American
than settling down in order
to avoid conflict, and therefore the beard marriage is
arguably the most patriotic
union ever conceived. Gay
men and lesbians are pairing up like dynamic duos,
tying the knot in order to
create the impression that
they embrace the heterosexual norm. Of course,
the result is a brilliant ruse.
Who could have guessed
that Rock Hudson, Rosie
O'Donnell
or Liberace
were really queer? Here are
some tips to help in making your beard marriage
successful.
We now live in a brave new world where
an African American man is our president,
where gay men and women are excelling
in the worlds of reality and talk show TV,
where hit songs on the radio abound with
same-sex trysts and where homosexuals are
out there fighting for the right to split their
worldly possessions 50/50 in divorce court.
But, shockingly, some folks with homosexual
tendencies still have to play hide-and-seek at
the playground. We still can't ask or tell in
the military. Certain religious factions still
openly compare lesbians to lepers. There are
companies, school boards, families and other
collective social units that still decree gayness
to be a blight on humanity. These pressures
weigh heavily on some of our team members.
(Or maybe they just want the great tax break
that Prop. 8 denies us.)
So, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. There
24
Icurve
switching out the transmission while hubby
is gallivanting around the kitchen wearing a
lacy apron. There can be no arguing about
who will wear the tux or who will lead your
first dance as a married couple. That's the
sacrifice of the beard marriage. He will have
to get his hands dirty and give up those long
workouts in the gym with the boys. She will
have to learn how to walk in heels without
tottering like Amy Winehouse on a one-day
pass. Hubby will wear the pants, but not the
hot pants. Wifey will wear the apron and
not the one that says Dykes Grill, Gay Men
Order In.
Youdonothaveto havesexif youarein a beard
marriage-I'msurethatis a reliefto bothparties.However, in order to fulfill the illusion,
a master bedroom should be invented that
reflects both of your tastes. Her NASCAR
collection and his Marky Mark Calvin Klein
Thelesbianshouldnotreally underwear framed print should both find
weara beard.That will be a space to share. However, when company
dead giveaway. It is OK for arrives, be sure to drool over the appropriate
the male to have a beard, item. But avoid the Key West decor in the
although, to throw off suspi- guest bedroom and the tribute to Xena in
cion, it should be a Grizzly the master bedroom. Everyone will be onto
Adams, Unibomber-esque
your true identities faster than Clark Kent
scraggly beard. No self-respecting gay man changing in a phone booth.
would be caught dead with such unruly facial
hair, although many self-respecting lesbians Ofcourse,youwill needto be socialwith your
might.
ownkind,butdiscretion
mustbe used.Going
to the Womyn's Music festival, Dinah Shore
Do not advertiseon Internetdatingsitesthat weekend or any kind of cruise may be a little
youandyourmanare lookingfor like-minded too out there. To fill your social needs, wifey
fakersfor a spiritedand exfoliatedsex romp. can join a softball team while hubby takes a
You are especially discouraged from posting flower-arranging course. But avoid any kind
a copy of your wedding photo, as your sis- of touching with anyone of the same gender
ter could stumble across this when looking while in public. Pass on the handshake at
for husband number four. (You know how church. Nix the slap on the butt after a home
sacred our hetero counterparts hold matri- run. Turn down the lap dance at the weekly
mony to be.) Your cover will be blown for sure. pot luck. Someone could get the wrong idea.
To one extent or another, we all play a
Be sure to properlyfall into your socially part that may not be entirely authentic,
acceptablegenderroles.The heteros have whether we sport the proverbial goatee, a
been acculturated to behave in certain ways full beard or a simple five o'clock shadow.
that you and your beard will need to adopt to Whatever the reason, a Gillette is a terrible
continue to fool everyone. Wifey cannot be thing to waste.
10 Thin s FemmesWishYou Knew
It's not a weapon ....it's just lipstick. By Robin Miner-Swartz
We femmes can feel unappreciated or misunderstood by our
sisters. Some butches don't know
what the hell to make of us. Is our
nail polish really that scary? Most
of us don't have weapons in our
Coach purses-just
several
lipsticks and a nail file. So,
here are 10 things we femmes
wish you knew about us. And
to help us out with the list,
we turned to two of the funniest femmes we know-comics
Suzanne
Westenhoefer (top) and Vickie Shaw.
the neighborhood chicken-wing joint with a
big bunch oflady-loving ladies. "I think there
is still an underlying suspicion-'She's
not
really one of us. She'll hurt me and leave me
for a man;" Westenhoefer says. Don't be so
quick to think we'll turn on you and we won't
be so quick to judge your hair.
Weare bottoms.
Period.
''And, whatever you're
doing in bed, do more;' Shaw says.
If we'rebossy,it's because
we knowyoudon't
thinkwe're lesbiansat all. ''At a bar, femmes
are all like, 'Would somebody please recognize that I'm a lesbian?' That's, I think, what
We mightbe sittingbesideyouwatchingthat makes femmes so aggressive;' Westenhoefer
NFLplayoffgame,but we're not payingatten- says. "I think that's why femmes get like, 'You,
me, dance floor, let's go, baby:" Then we hope
tion."In our minds, we are doing something
completely different;' Westenhoefer says. you overpower us later.
"But we are watching you out of the corner of
our eye so we can jump up and scream when We want you to think we're pretty.''Always,
you do:' We will, however, happily deck our- without fail, tell us how stunning we are;'
selves out in whatever team colors you like Shaw says. And remember: Lipstick is not
(especially if beads and leis are involved) and the enemy. Please don't hate us if we try to
get you to cut your mullet. Or buy clothes in
go get you another beer.
the women's department. We're not trying to
"Takecareofthecarandpayallthebills,geez."
Or, to put a finer point on Shaw's words, we
really do like to be taken care 0£ It makes us
feel special. And we will take care of you by
looking totally fabulous-about
90 percent
of the time. We all get Sunday mornings off.
Wehaveonedog(andno cats},because
we're
morelikegaymen,Westenhoefer says.Also, our
dogs tend to be on the smaller side. Because if
we had a big Rottweiler-Shepherd mix, we'd
have to go running with it or do something
else that might make us break a sweat.
We'realwaysright.Please just know this and
embrace it. Shaw would like you to learn to
say, without hesitation, "Yes, honey:'
We reallyare part of the club.Even though
we do quite well sipping cosmopolitans at
cocktail parties with gay boys (pinkies up!),
we love nothing more than kicking back at
change you-really. OK, maybe a little, but
not to the point of discomfort. You don't have
to wear cute shoes.
Wemaybe comfortable
in cargoshorts,a tank
top,a baseball
capandKeens,
but"girly"outfits
arereallymorein ourcomfortzone.We might
not wear dresses, nylons and heels all that
often, but we will wear pink-and jewelryand get pedicures regularly.
Focuson us,please."No matter what we let
you think, it's all about us;' Shaw says. We
want to be the center of attention and we
want to be adored. Yes, it's shallow, but we can
be deep, too. You would know this if you'd
only give us more than a glance.
"You meet so many girls who are big
giant butches and don't want to be called
that;' Westenhoefer says. "It's like, accept
your stereotypes. Is labeling really so wrong?
I'm completely fine about being a big, giant
femme:'
Amen, sister. Wanna borrow my Clinique
Long Last Soft Matte Lipstick? I have it in
five colors ...
ADVICE Health
LesbianTeensat
HigherRiskfor Pregnancy
A recent study published by the Canadian Journal
of Human Sexuality found that lesbian, gay and
bisexual youth had higher rates of pregnancy than
their straight peers. The study, led by University
of British Columbia professor Elizabeth Saewyc,
examines the self-reported data of teens surveyed in 1992, 1998 and 2003. Over the 11-year
period, overall rates of teen pregnancy went
down, but sexually active LGB youth consistently
reported disproportionately higher rates.
The youth polled were also asked about their
age when their first sexual activity occurred, their
total number of partners, substance abuse before
sex, condom use and sexual abuse history. In
many areas, LGB youth engaged in more risky
sexual behavior than their peers. For example,
sexually active self-identified lesbian teens
reported their first sexual activity occurred prior
to age 14 at a rate of 48 percent in 2003-down
from their 1998 rate of 68 percent but higher than
that of their bisexual (26 percent) or straight (13
percent) peers.
When asked what factor contributes most to
these results, Saewyc expressed the need for
further research and policy development, as both
Canada and the United States have "unacceptable levels of sexual abuse. We need to pay more
attention."
The research on risky sexual behavior in teens
remains sparse. In broad terms, Saewyc
states that schools and communities can
help "teach kids what healthy relationships look like," regardless of their
orientation. She heavily emphasizes
the need for substantive sex education and urges parental involvement. "They can advocate with the
school for allowing supportive policies, like gay-straight alliances."
And what becomes of the pregnant Lesbian and bisexual teens in
those statistics? Another knowledge gap: Pregnancy makes
them "less visible." They go
from being LGB teens to
pregnant teens. "What
does that do in terms of
our care of them and
their children?" asks
Saewyc. [Andrea
Millar]
THE RUMBLE DOWN UNDER
If you'veeverdreamed
of holdingupa ?-Eleven
andgoingdownontheclerk,the
Smodnoc
is the perfectpleasure
weaponfor you.Basically
a sexmaskthatturns
yourtongueintoa latexpuppet,the Smodnoc
is the latestin safe-sexinnovation.
Ofcourse,it lookscompletely
ridiculous,
buta littlehumiliation
is a smallpriceto
payfor protecting
yourhealth.HowdoestheSmodnoc
compare
to the classic
dentaldam?[HeatherRobinson]
SM0DN0C
(grapeflavored
by LineOne
Laboratories)
Cost:
20 unitsfor $40
About$1.50a dam
Sexiness
of name:
"Smodnoc"
maymean"hotoral
pleasure"in Ork,butin Englishit
just soundslikethe nameof a bad
thrasherband.
I'mnotsurewhat'smoresexy,
thinkingof yourdentistor thinkingof yourvaginaasa potentia
floodthatneedsto bedammed
Ease
of use:
TheSmodnoc
is easyto use.Gettingthegirlto stoplaughingmight
bemoreof a challenge.
It's easyto use,butit's not
alwayseasyto usewell.
Perks:
Thetexturedsurfaceaddssome
extra"ahhh"to the receiver's
experience.
Because
it strapsto
theface,it leavesyourhandsfree
for otherendeavors.
Improved
communication
skills.
Because
you'llhavenoidea
whereherclit is,youwill be
forcedto talk aboutit.
Bummers: Thetonguepockettendsto fill up
withsalivaanddrowningin one's
ownspitis notparticularly
sexy.
Themaskalsomakesit difficultto
speak,sogetyoursweetnothings
in beforeyougetit on.
In myopinion,usinga dental
dam,evena goodone,is like
tryingto paintthe MonaLisa
througha garbagebag.
DO YOU PRACTICE SAFE SEX WITH WOMEN?
Sometimes,
depending
on
the sexact
(Dentaldams?
Toomuchtrouble)
Sometimes
depending
on my
partner
According
to a curvemag.com
poll
ITRIED
IT
Womb Withouta View
Looking for some alone time? Try a sensory deprivation tank. By Gillian Kendall
It was a typical weekend evening, and
my partner and I were companionably
complaining about bills: the mortgage,
the damn insurance on everything, the
vet expenses for our four aging animals. I
told her, "I get tired of being a grownup:'
Sometimes I want to be a kid again, with
someone else to not only pay the rent but
also clothe and feed me, take me out for fun
and then, when I've had enough, take me
home and put me to bed. I want to sleep in
a place both warm and dark, preferably a
waterbed heated to body temperature-as
womblike as possible.
I get that womb-y escape from isolation tanks.
Also called float tanks and sensory depravation
tanks, they are large, waterproof, soundproof boxes
in which the user floats on a bed of water thick with
Epsom salts, basking in dark, warm, private silence. I
first floated when I lived in downtown San Diego, a
city so sunny and lively that it frayed my nerves. For
relaxation, and out of curiosity, I took the plunge
into isolation.
It's a little like death. After I had a calming drink
of herbal tea in the anteroom, a soft-spoken receptionist led me to the changing room to get ready for
my soak. There I stood alone in a large, dark bathroom with piped-in, ultra-soft New Age music, getting ready to face infinity-for an hour, at least.
I shed my clothes, put in earplugs and
applied Vaseline to any little cuts or scrapes on my
body, so the salt wouldn't sting and interfere with my
bliss. Then I opened the lid of a coffinlike box and
peered inside. Strewn with Epsom salts, the water
smelled like the ocean and looked like molten glass.
Stepping in, I felt nothing at all-the water was
exactly my body temperature-and
once I leaned
back, floating was inevitable. Well supported, I sank
only slightly, my knees and breasts staying above
the surface. With my face well above the waterline,
I breathed in the steamy, salty air with gratitude. I
couldn't go under if I tried, and no one was going to
bother me for a long time.
I took several minutes to close the top of the box, because I knew that once the lid came down, it was going
to be utterly dark and a little weird. (Claustrophobes,
take note: There's no lock on the lid and you can open
it with a touch at any time.) But once I shut out the
light, I wasn't afraid of the dark so much as fascinated
by the noise and color inside my own mind.
What came to me was a slow, gradual peace, like
going into a dreamless sleep. The day's worries and
my recent emotional upheavals melted away, leaving
me feeling safe and protected. In my timeout from
life, I was free to think things through, to meditate or
pray or do nothing at all.
Also, I saw a light-not enough to interfere with
my relaxation, but a sure, small beam of white, like a
star, coming from the far end of the tank. I thought
there must be a pinprick opening in the seal of
the lid.
Later on, when soft music wafted into the tank
to suggest that my soak was over, I dressed and was
reborn to the world of light and sound. As I drank
a second cup of chamomile, I told the receptionist
about the light leak.
"Oh, really?" he said. "I doubt it, but I'm always
looking for an excuse to soak. I'll go check it our:'
Ten minutes later he came back grinning, drying his
hair. "There's no leak;' he said. "We get sent in there all
the time to look for lights-red, gold, white-people
see all kinds of things. Whatever you saw, it wasn't
coming from outside:'
There I stood
alone in a large,
dark bathroom
with piped-in,
ultra-soft New
Age music,
getting ready to
face infinityfor an hour,
at least.
May 2009 j 27
ADVICE Money
Can YourPooch Make You Rich?
Some lesbians find financial independence with doggie day care. By Sassafras Lowrey
Though the gayby boom is in full force, many
lesbians still prefer canine dependents. Gone
are our grandmother's days, when dogs fended for themselves and ate whatever scraps
were put in their dish. Today's dogs enjoy
organic food, holistic veterinary treatments
and, of course, playtime at day care, which is
a boon for businesses that cater to themand their moms. Enter Camp Bow Wow:
one of the premier doggie day care facilities
and an international franchise with over 90
day care centers in operation and another
115 in development in both the U.S. and
Canada. And the best part? Camp Bow Wow
is incredibly LGBT-friendly. Founder Heidi
Flammang told The Advocate in 2007 that
about 25 percent of the franchise's owners
were lesbian or gay, and some say the current estimate is closer to 40 percent.
Randy Defazio and Sherri Hayes are
part of that lesbian franchise boom. The
couple own and operate two Camp Bow
Wow facilities, one each in Bridgewater and
Lawrenceville, N.J. For them, it was most
important to buy into a business that was accepting of their family.
"The Camp Bow Wow franchise is very
gay-friendly. In fact, we could not ask for a
2s
Icurve
more inclusive environment. Quite honestly,
we did not experience any concerns, even
in the beginning. One of the things that we
have loved about this environment from
the start is that Sherri and I can be who we
are;' says Defazio. Their account is echoed
by CeCe Campbell, who has owned her
Northglenn, Colo., franchise with her partner since 2004.
The premise behind Camp Bow Wow is
that it's a place "where a dog can be a dog:'
This means that while moms are busy at
work, Rover gets to spend the day with a
whole cast of canine buddies, playing, napping, snacking and generally living it up
in doggie paradise, all under the watchful
supervision of trained camp counselors. "We
divide the dogs up in groups based on factors such as size, playfulness and age, so they
are with dogs that are similar to themselves;'
Hayes explains.
The couple goes on to discuss how Camp
Bow Wow is also an option for parents who
travel. Pooches spending the night participate in day care activities, and then at night
they get to bed down in their own private
cabins. "The dogs enjoy their play groups all
day long but take breaks to eat, sleep and rest
in their cabins;' says Hayes. "A.ftereach meal,
the dogs rest for an hour or so, to digest.
Then, at night, they go into their cabins as
very contented and tired pups:'
The women were all drawn to Camp Bow
Wow for different reasons. For Campbell
it was out of a need for a facility she could
trust. "We love to travel and found it difficult
locating an acceptable place for our two fourlegged kids to stay. So, in trying to solve that
problem we came across Camp Bow Wow
and doggie day care as a concept:'
Defazio and Hayes were looking for a
change, and came to doggie day care to move
away from corporate America. "We were
very much ready for a change, so we had
been looking at several potential business
opportunities;' recalls Defazio. 'i\t the same
time, as dog owners, we saw a big void in the
services provided in the industry:'
Now the two spend their days with a whole
pack of canine kids. "We don't look at this
as just taking care of dogs. We view this as
establishing and maintaining relationships
with both the dogs and their people;' she
explains. "We see some of these dogs and their
people several times a week, or even every day,
so we really get to know them well. We have
developed some very strong bonds:'
While Campbell's facility outside Denver
doesn't have quite as many lesbian clients as
she'd like, Defazio and Hayes have a strong
following in the community. "Many lesbians
have dogs and they want the best for them,
which we think Camp Bow Wow is;' says
Hayes. "We also think that many lesbians
are happy to support lesbian- and gay-owned
businesses:'
Are you thinkingof buying
a franchise?Lookingfor a
lesbian-friendlycompany?
Check out cool franchises
(like Wild Birds Unlimited,
right)and interviewswith lesbian
businessowners in an upcoming
issue and at www.curvemag.com.
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petparents.com
A09102
DYKE
DRAMA
A Woman of Influence
How to spot the pretenders in our midst. By Michele Fisher
I am a bad influence. When I was a kid, my
mom would automatically assume I was
involved in every bit of mischief that occurred
in our neighborhood. I often overheard her
on the telephone with other parents offering
me up as the culprit of a caper without even
bothering to hear my side of the story. I was
prone to fibbing, but at least she could have
asked. She and the other mothers on the
block would act as if their own children were
guileless innocents with no free will of their
own. They were but robots and I was at the
controls, laughing maniacally as I sent them
on their sinister missions. Funny, all of that
power and my family remained lower middle
class. I suppose I could have set up a pick,
pocket ring or a drug cartel, but I hadn't yet
learned how to put my influential personality
to good use.
Until I became a lesbian.
I mean, I was always gay, but once I told
everybody, it not only defined who I was,
but seemed to render some other women
incapable of making their own choices. "You
made me gay!" they would inevitably shriek
in horror one day, after the sex had become
tiresome or their boyfriends became suspi,
cious or I had asked for a commitment.
I had the power to make women into homo,
sexuals, or so it seemed. As superpowers go,
being able to turn people gay would appear
to be a pretty great one. But it didn't work on
everybody and it never seemed to last long.
What good was a superpower if it didn't
work on the people you wanted it to work
on, and it wore off just when you started
enjoying yourself?
One night, I drove 400 miles just to see a
woman who swore she couldn't live without
me, only to find her drunk in a corner mak,
ing out with some gappy,mouthed hockey
player. When I intervened, she gave me a
smile that was as heartless as her boyfriend's
was toothless.
Another woman's spell wore off just as
I was standing in her parents' living room
while she got ready to go out with me. She
announced to her parents, her numerous
30 I curve
siblings, the cat and me that she was not a
homosexual and she did not appreciate me
trying to turn her into one. Her father was
much swifter than I expected him to be.
Luckily, I had more stamina. If her dad had
known that his daughter required about 50
sexual encounters to (ahem) come to her
decision, I am quite sure he could have
squeezed out another couple of blocks.
Yes, the ability to turn bets into temporary
homos has been more of a curse than a bless,
ing. But at least I wasn't alone. Other fags
and dykes seemed to have the same godlike
power over other peoples' sexuality, too. We
would share our tales of woe over glasses of
cheap wine and bottomless cups of weak coffee at the gay cafe, where we were just as likely
as not to run into our on,again, off,again
homosexual suitors. Gradually, we began to
see patterns emerge, and eventually I became
able to predict with great success which girls
were going to become only temporarily gay.
But figuring out how my superpower
worked did not always keep me out of harm's
way. Sometimes a girl would just be too
pretty for me to care what the future helduntil something bad happened, and then I
would realize again that it's just not worth it.
You would think that letting her make the
first move would prevent this type of disaster. After all, if the physical connection is her
idea, then there is no way for her to blame
it on you later. Ha! Remember, they have no
free will. You, the gay, are in total control of
her actions, as well as your own. You made
her make the first move.
Surely after a certain period of time passes
and she is still sleeping with you, she will
realize that she is indeed gay. Don't bet on
it. There was this old law enforcement myth
that cops are not allowed to lie about being
cops. You used to see it on TV all the time.
Hookers and drug dealers asking potential
customers if they were cops because somehow police officers were compelled to admit
their occupational identities, if questioned
about them directly. It took criminals a
long time to realize that undercover officers
blow their cover only after they bust you.
Although cops can't be deterred by direct
questions about their identities, pseudodykes often can.
You want to avoid being cast as the villain
in Who Made Jenny a Muff Diver?Just ask
Jenny from the start if she is gay. My mistake
was assuming that just because a girl kissed
me in all the appropriate places, she was gay.
But there is more to being a lesbian than having sex with a woman. Being a dyke means
taking responsibility for your actions.
In this case, words speak louder than
actions. When she comes up for air, ask her
if she considers herself to be a homosexual.
Saying yes, claiming to be bi or saying she
isn't sure are all perfectly acceptable answers,
but if she gets mad and doesn't answer you
or ignores the question completely, I say drop
her like she's not hot.
Closet cases don't bother me nearly as
much as head cases. I can keep your secret
if I have to, but if you can't even tell yourself that you are queer, then what's the point?
You can't have sex with women when it suits
you and then go back to your straight world
when lesbian life becomes too real.
If you think that these women are perfect
for the dyke on the go who just wants a quick
roll, think again. These faux-lesbian types
suck the life out of you better than they suck
anything else.
They can't say they like girls, but they
always want to talk you to death about everything else before they sleep with you, which
is all the more reason not to get involved with
one of these Voldemort types. (You know,
the evil so evil that you dare not speak its
name.) If she can't say"gay" then don't be gay
with her.
And should some self-loather "drama out"
on you someday and accuse you of turning
her into a lesbian, you just tell her not to worry because homosexuality is temporary-it
only lasts one lifetime. Then tell her you are
leaving because she is a bad influence.
May 2009
I31
POLITICS
Hearin the Lesbian Voice
One of our longest running columnists looks back. By Victoria A. Brownworth
People often ask me why, since I have had
a job writing for the mainstream press for
years, I also still write for the queer press. I
am also frequently asked why we need a queer
press at all. These questions make me a little
impatient and a little sad.
I write for the queer press because I'm a
lesbian. I want to write for my own
community, not just the straight
community. I want to write about
issues that directly impact my
people.
As for why we need a queer
press, the answer is because we
for the Advocate. But I felt excluded from my
own life as a lesbian because all the stories I
wrote were either for a straight audience or
for a gay male audience. The same impetus
that made publisher Frances Stevens found
this magazine made me want to write for it.
Where was the lesbian voicer
A decade before I began writing here, I edited an
insert for PGN, my
the women of The L Word the way straight
women do over the men of Greys Anatomy?
Of course.
It's about balance.
A lesbian writer I have known for decades
often complains that there's not enough good
lesbian writing out there, that there's too much
fluff. I agree. But there's also not enough good
writing, period. It's not endemic to lesbianism.
And part of true equality, I think, is being able
When I was a young lesbian there was
no lesbian press ...where lesbians could
hear the panoply and diversity of their
own voices. Curve gave us that.
stonewall 25
Even after 19 years we still need a lesbian press.
need to make our voices heard. We need a
queer press because we are not yet full citizens
of this or any other country, and mainstream
culture is as uninterested in our lives as it is
in our civil rights. If we want our stories told,
we need writers like me, writers who have a
personal investment in telling those stories.
When I began writing this column, 19
years ago (when it still went by the name
Deneuve), it was because I wanted to write
for and about lesbians. At that time, I was a
reporter for one of the largest daily newspapers in the country and also wrote regularly
32
Icurve
local Philadelphia gay
newspaper, and called
it "The Lesbian Voice:'
It focused on lesbian
issues, news and culture. But the endeavor was short-lived
and I was soon back
on the gay male beat
at that paper.
So when this magazine approached me,
my own lesbian voice had been pent up for a
long time. It was very freeing to have a space to
write to and about lesbians. I no longer had to
subsume my own lesbianism in my writing.
Over the years of writing for this magazine
I have never wavered in my desire to address
the community of women eager for news
about the lesbian world. Just because Ellen is
on TV every afternoon doesn't mean we have
been mainstreamed.
This publication, like any other glossy,
monthly "lifestyle" magazine, has addressed a
range of issues, trends and gossip over the years.
A lot of serious stuff comes out of the magazine, and there's also a lot of entertaining fluff.
But it's all queer. And sometimes you need
fluff just as much as you need serious writing. Shouldn't we be able to crush out on
to have it all-the guilty-pleasure fluff as well
as the prize-winningjournalism and literature.
Over my years here I have almost
always written about the serious issues: dykes
on death row, rape, domestic violence, cancer, child custody. Politics and more politics.
Occasionally I have written the fluff-interviews and entertainment pieces. I have loved
doing it all.
Not only has it been a very powerful
experience for me to talk directly to a queer
audience, but I have, on occasion, actually
gotten to see how much it has meant to my
readers.
A few years ago, a lover of mine died of
cervical cancer. I promised her when I visited
her in hospice that I would write her story.
I wrote about her unnecessary, untimely
and very lesbian death-she'd had no health
insurance, no regular doctor, and, as a butch
lesbian, had felt uncomfortable going to the
gynecologist.
After the story was published, we got a
series of letters from women who had read
the piece, gone and gotten tested and found
they had cancer. These women wanted to say
how the story saved their lives.
This is why we need a queer press and
<(
why we need independent publications. Over 0
Shaking Things up in Bogota
nearly two decades, we have established a
relationship with our readers. We are speak~
ing directly to lesbian, bisexual and transgen~
der women about the things that matter in
their lives. We are reaching out not just to
the Castro district in San Francisco and the
Village in New York City, but to all the places
where lesbians live and work and maybe aren't
able to come out to their families and friends,
but can read about being lesbian and imag~
ine that one day they will be able to be out
safely in their own town. Or maybe they'll be
encouraged to move to Chicago or Altanta or
West Hollywood and come out there.
When I was a young lesbian there was no
lesbian press. There was a burgeoning gay
male press and a feminist press, but nowhere
for lesbians to hear the panoply and diversity
of their own voices. Curve gave us that.
No doubt there are those who think of it
as just another"women's" magazine, no differ~
ent from Cosmo, Glamour or Elle. Certainly
there are aspects of those magazines in
ours. But it still all comes back to one thing:
queer. The voices in this magazine are queer.
The writers and editors are queer. The sub~
ject of our discourse here-whether
were
writing about music or art, books or TV,
politics or sex-is queer.
When you pick up this magazine, wheth~
er it's at the Starbucks off Castro Street, at
your local queer bookstore or at the end of
the dirt road where it just arrived in your
mailbox, when you open it up what you see
are women, women, women. Lesbians mostly,
but also bisexual and transgender women.
But it's all about us, our queer female voices
and what we have to say-whether
we are
young or old, fat or thin, white or of color, tat~
ted up and pierced or seemingly conservative,
athletic or disabled, rich or poor.
Why do we need queer writers and a queer
press:' Because we have things to say and
issues to address that the straight media
could not care less about, but that are
vital to our lives. Why do we need Curve:'
Because 19 years after one lesbian put up her
own money to print a much less glamorous
version of the magazine you are now reading,
our voices are still easily drowned out in the
straight world and the gay male world, and
we want our own, clearly heard voice. Curve
gives us that voice. And I, for one, after 19
years, am still grateful.
In any guidebook to Colombia you
come across today, there is inevitably a paragraph describing how
deeply entrenched machismo is
in this staunchly Roman Catholic
country. Although Colombia is
changing and, in fact, it has some of
the most progressive laws for samesex couples in the entire Western
Hemisphere, out lesbians and gay
men in the public eye are still few
and far between.
That's what makes Blanca
Duran, the 36-year-old mayor of the
Chapinero district of Bogota, a true
trailblazer. She's out, and Colombia
is proud.
"I thought it was important to talk
about being a lesbian so that others would see that you don't have
to hide in the closet in Colombia
anymore," Duran told reporters when
she was elected. "I hope that it will
make it easier for others to come out
and give greater visibility to the gay
community."
Politics didn't come naturally to
Duran, who is an industrial engineer
by training. After college, however,
as she slowly embarked on a path of
self-acceptance, she also began to
gravitate toward activism. She became a member of a left-leaning party, the Polo Democratico, where she
was one of the founders of the Polo
de Rosa, the Party's LGBT interest
group. Under her leadership the Polo
de Rosa frequently flexes its muscle:
Recently, they had a party senator
admonished for voting against the
rights of same-sex couples.
She was also an active board
member of the main LGBT rights
organization in the country,
Colombia Diversa. Thanks in great
part to its efforts, the movement has
seen some extraordinary successes.
After several attempts for recognition of couples' rights had failed
in the congress, Colombia Diversa
got Colombia's highest court to
grant civil union rights for same-sex
couples this past January.
Without a doubt, that decision
catapulted Colombia alongside
Uruguay and Canada into the spotlight as one of the most advanced
countries in the hemisphere in
terms of gay rights. It has made an
enormous impact on the community.
But similarly important for the movement is getting gays and lesbians
in the public arena to dar la cara, or
become visible. Enter Duran.
She begins her workday at 6
a.m. She is constantly meeting with
community groups and is obsessed
with convincing the police that,
yes, women are capable of being
tough on crime. Much of the job
can be routine, but it is promoting convivencia ("living together")
among Chapinero residents, gay and
straight, that means perhaps the
most to Duran, and will be at the top
of her agenda for the remainder of
her term. "I hope that we can get to
a point where getting along doesn't
mean we have to kick out those who
are different," she says. [Andrew
Dier]
May 2009
I33
L
ESBIAN POLITICOS, like Wisconsin's Tammy Baldwin and California's
Sheila Kuel, have been making waves for over two decades, defying
the odds and courageously paving the way for the next generation
of female politicians. From New York to Hawaii, these 10 fascinating women
get our vote every time.
NicoleLefavour
Idaho state Sen. Nicole
LeFavour's road to the statehouse has been a long one.
For 10 years before she was
elected, she worked as a volunteer for nonprofit organizations, and the
frustration of not being heard by her elected
officials spurred her into launching her own
career in government. "I talked to legislators
about human rights, tax policy, healthcare,
consumer protection and gay and lesbian
issues. Hard issues. I rarely saw anything I
worked for get printed by a committee, much
less passed into law. In my 30s, I spent a lot
of time angry with lawmakers who disagreed
with me on the issues that affected my life,"
she recounts. But she says she's also found allies in unexpected places-the year before she
ran for the legislature, one of the most antigay lawmakers in the statehouse became one
of her strongest allies on a healthcare bill she
was working to pass for the Idaho Community
Action Network. And since taking office she
has learned the importance of working with
her fellow lawmakers to get things done. "We
may debate heatedly on an issue one minute,
but the next minute on the floor we might
have to be allies on a different bill-one that
won't pass without us working together. We
humans are pretty multi-faceted. To make it
all work we have to remember what we agree
on and have in common:'
TinaWard-Pugh
"One of my primary passions for 20 years
has been affordable housing," says Louisville,
Kentucky's Ninth District Councilwoman
Tina Ward- Pugh, who holds a master's
degree in social work and worked as the
administrative director for the Coalition for
the Homeless for several years. Ward- Pugh
also played a strong role in the passage of a
fairness ordinance, ending discrimination
against gays and lesbians, only 26 days after
she was elected. She helped open the minds
of five Republicans who
opposed the ordinance by
participating in the discussion as an out lesbian, thus
putting a human face on
the issue. "It made it very
uncomfortable for those five Republicans.
When folks are educated, and have a face on
any issue, they become more comfortable with
it;' Ward- Pugh explains. "There is no question
but that as a state we have a long way to go.
But I see that as a challenge, that we just have
a little more work to do here:' She even sees
a lesbian president in our future. "I have every confidence that that will be the case," says
Ward- Pugh. "More and more, it's the people
who are 40 years and older that struggle with
retaining any sense of awkwardness about
gays and lesbians. Those 40 and under don't
understand what the big deal is. These people
are becoming our voters and civic leaders:'
SusanTalamantes
Eggman
Susan Talamantes Eggman
is already getting things
done during her first term
on the city council of
Stockton, Cali£, a city with
one of the highest crime rates in the state. "I
like to be able to connect with people," says
Eggman. "That's how I won office. I went
door to door and we had community rallies.
And, I would like to think, the same way I
ran my campaign I have served:' Eggman ran
in a conservative area, against a very conservative opponent who actually claimed to be
"God's candidate:' "She really shot herself in
the foot with that," says Eggman, who was
never in the closet. "First of all, I look like a
big ol' lesbian, and secondly, I think secrets
breed Achilles' heels. As an elected official,
my prime responsibility is to enable people to
grab on and make a difference themselves. If
we all join together, just think of the changes
we could bring. I'm the happiest of all when
people come up to me and let me know I
have touched their everyday lives:'
Christine
Kehoe
California state Sen. Christine Kehoe was
the first out politician elected in San Diego
County back in 1993 and is
now serving her second term.
She is an energy conservationist and environmentalist
and feels that Californians are
leaders in saving the planet.
"Californians really embrace change, and are
very adamant about pursuing environmental
protection. Fundamentally, they want clean
air and clean water," she says. Kehoe is passionate about the need to change the automo-
owerful
lesbian
By
Jennifer
Corday
oliticia ns
34 I curve
tive industry. When the federal government
failed to step up [when?], California was the
first state to lead several others in proposing
a state law that limits tailpipe emissions, a
smart way to force Detroit to start manufacturing more fuel-efficient vehicles."California
consumers rank as one of the fifth- or sixthlargest spenders on the planet, so we tend to
influence the world as a cultural leader. We embrace new products, whether it's Frisbees, or
wind sailboards or the new hydrogen highway. I think Californians believe we're free to
pursue our dreams, and I think that makes
us a leader:' Unfortunately, California did
not come through in defeating Proposition
8, but the senator is confident that the battle
is not over. "The fact that Prop. 8 passed is an
enormous disappointment to everyone who
believes in nondiscrimination, but I believe
that next time we do it we will prevail:'
RosieMendez
Forty-five-year-old
Rosie
Mendez is young at heart
(hence the active MySpace
page and stellar taste in
music).
A
Democrat,
Mendez won a tight race in 2005 for city
council in New York City's District 2, continuing a lifelong commitment to activism,
legal advocacy and government service. She
also serves on the board of the Washington,
D.C.-based Mautner Project, which provides support for lesbians with cancer as
well as for their families. Her activism has
also included work for the Puerto Rican
Legal Defense and Education Fund and the
National Gay and Lesbian Task Force. Born
in the Williamsburg section of Brooklyn,
Mendez lived in public housing and attended
New York City public schools. She has long
been a fighter for affordable housing and is
admired for her ability to adapt to changewhether she's wearing a business suit to
make a serious speech about affordable
housing, or riding a bicycle in shorts and a
baseball cap for a community fundraiser for
kids, Mendez always keeps it real, which has
made her very popular in New York City's
Lower East Side.
LupeValdez
Lupe Valdez has always had a good work
ethic. She earned a Bachelor of Arts degree
in business administration by working two
jobs while going to school full-time. After
graduating, Valdez served as a captain in the
U.S. Army, where she was
a tank commander, then
started her career in law
enforcement, earning an
M.A. in criminology and
criminal justice from the
University of Texas at Arlington. Lopez is
the highest ranking law enforcement officer
in Dallas county and Texas' only female sheriff. Today her 30 years of experience in law
enforcement makes her a force to be reckoned with in Dallas County.
KimCocoIwamoto
Having grown up attending schools in
Hawaii, State Board of Education member
Kim Iwamoto brings personal experience as
well as professional prowess to her goal of providing
every student with the
best educational opportunities possible. Born in
Hawaii after her ancestors migrated from Japan
to work in the fields, Iwamoto believes in
serving the greater good, and has pledged a
lifelong commitment to volunteerism and
community service. Iwamoto holds a B.A.
in creative writing from San Francisco State
University and a J.D. from the University of
New Mexico School of Law, is a member
of the Safe Schools Community Advisory
Committee for the Department of Education
and often speaks at high schools and colleges
on civil rights issues and the importance of
community service.
PatriciaTodd
Rep. Patricia Todd was
elected to the Alabama
Legislature in 2006, making her the state's first
openly gay elected public official. She has been a strong advocate
for policies relevant to social justice and is
presently the associate director of AIDS
Alabama in Birmingham. She feels strongly
about improving healthcare, fighting poverty
and creating public policy that influences
marginalized,
underserved
communities.
She lives with her partner in Birmingham,
Ala., and was the founder of the Alabama
chapter of Stonewall Democrats.
MaryWiseman
When Ohio Gov. Ted Strickland appointed
Mary Wiseman to take the judicial seat on
the County Court of Common Pleas in
Montgomery, fellow Democratic contender
James D. Piergies challenged the decision,
despite Wiseman's 19 years of litigation experience. Piergies said that
Wiseman should not hear
cases involving the state
amendment banning samesex marriage, or Dayton's
new human rights ordinance, because she is a lesbian. A governor's judicial appointments are
rarely challenged by members of their own
party, and Piergie was immediately attacked
for thinly veiled bigotry and raising the issue
of Wiseman's sexuality "in the hope that homophobia would rear its ugly head and propel [him] to elected office"by attorney Steven
Dank Sr. in the Dayton Daily News and the
Gay People'sChronicle.Piergie dropped out
of the race the next day. Wiseman is now the
first openly gay judge in the history of the
state of Ohio.
LoriSchreiber
Lori Schreiber called on
over 20 years of experience
in social services, activism
and community volunteering to beat out a 24-year
incumbent and get elected as Township
Commissioner of Abington, Penn. "We're in
charge of everything from code enforcement
to parks, libraries, fire departments, police
departments and more;' says Schreiber, who
has been working hard to revitalize the town
since her 2005 election. "We had 15 to 20
vacant stores, and I knew it was important
to make people realize that this part of the
town was vital and alive by bringing in new
stores, creating more foot traffic and having more activities:' Schreiber was also out
from the get-go. "I made the decision from
the very start. I was a little bit worried that
it would be a strike against me when I ran,
but ... it was less of an issue than I thought
it would be:'
Schreiber is passionate about doing more
work on issues that affect poverty and homelessness. "There are all kinds of initiatives
that we need to work harder on to help eliminate poverty, and POWER is an organization
I helped start for people with mental illness;'
she says. Shreiber also helped create the
Open Door Program, a counseling program
for LGBT teens where she also served as a
clinical counselor.
April 2009
I35
ndrogynous, sexy and sporting a striking set of baby blues, out lesbian
Daniela Sea joined Showtime's The L Word in season three as Moira and takes her final bow as
Max. Over the course of the series, Max faced discrimination in the workplace, got the heave~
ho from Ms. Jenny Schecter and grew a wicked soul patch. And aside from the character's
physical transition from female to male (pulled off by Sea's amazing talent) Max became the
resident IT expert, gave credence to Shane's assertion that sexuality is fluid by falling for Jodi's
male interpreter and was apparently the only character on the show who'd seen the end of
Single White Female (i.e., Adele). While it may be a wrap for The L Word, for Sea, an activist,
actor and musician, this is just the beginning. The wandering artist who's traveled across the
world has a screenplay in the works, taken a stab at the horror genre in Don't Look Up and is
back to her punk rock roots with a possible album in the mix. She opens up about her life, how
playing a trans man has changed her perspective on gender identity and the meaning behind
her tattoos.
HowdoyoufeelaboutTheL Wordcoming
to a close?
I can't say I'm sad because, for me, every year was a great surprise ... ! guess in the world of
being an artist it's just on a project~by~project basis, because it's not like a regular job where
you imagine ... you could be doing it forever, until you retire. Everybody knows there is a lin:ut
with TV shows, like, Showtime almost always does five years. So yeah, there wasn't really time
to be sad about it. I guess I felt sad saying goodbye to the crew and some of my friends there.
But then, I have this weird feeling that we will probably all see each other again, in some other
form, anyway.
Speaking
of a castreunion,
wouldyoubeupforan L Wordmovie?
Well, I don't know. I'd have to hear and see what it was about. I guess I would want to know
what the story was, but-quite possibly.
Wereyouhappywithhowthecharacter
of Maxwaswritten?
Being a political activist ... ! would feel upset sometimes if I felt like there was misrepresenta~
tion happening. I would be thinking, How is this going to affect the image of trans people in·
the media? But then there is another side of me that, as an actor, if I feel like I can relate to the
character, then I don't judge what's happening. The arc of the character in general, every year,
was giving me a different kind of angle and [was] almost like playing a different person. He
changed. He went through so many changes.
DidplayingMaxchange
thewayyouviewtransgender
people?
It hasn't changed the way I view transgender people because I just feel like the lines of gender are
way more blurry than the way [they are] generally accepted in the mainstream. That's how me
and my friends have always lived, so I don't feel like Max was [really different from] a lot of my
friends, you know, other than he decided to take a certain action with the hormones. But in gen~
eral, I didn't look at it like a science experiment. To me, he's just an interesting and cool person.
Whataboutyourowngenderidentity?
I played this character for four summers. That would be three-a little more than three
years-of my life in this consciousness of this person. And in any role that I've played in my
life-even if it was theatre or films or anything-I just like to try to inhabit the person, like it's
me, in a way, and pull out those sides of me. It's a fun game, in a way.
Anytime you get to know a character that you're playing or a person in life, it's going to change
you in some ways and make you question or change your own identity. I think I've grown a lot in
these last years, and definitely getting to know Max is going to be part of that growth.
WhateffectdoyouthinkMaxhashadonyouraudience's
opinion
oftranspeople?
I think mainstream America loves TV, so anything that is on TV all of a sudden becomes
May 2009
I37
rural situations and also collectively, and traveling and stuff
like that.
Andyou'rein a bandnow,right?Thorns
of Life?
Yeah, I am playing with some old friends of mine that I've
known since I was a teenager, and that's pretty fun.
Howdidthatallcometogether?
I was just in New York a couple months ago to do stuff for
the [presidential] campaign, and when my friend found out I
was in town, he said, "You want to play bass with usr It could
be fun:' So we just played some house shows and we really
dedicated it to being super independent, so it's not going to be
anything mainstream-we're not interested in trying to make
a career of it or anything. It's just about getting back and playing in a lot of scenes where we come from, which would be the
anarchist punk scenes of the U.S.
Doesthatmeantherewon'tbeanalbumora tour?
We'll probably make an album, but we're not going to [tour].
We just play house shows and all-ages punk clubs and stuff.
We're not trying to
I don't
like Max was [really different from] play at rock arenas or
anything like that. I
a lot of my friends other than he decided to
come from this punk
rock background, so
take a certain action with the hormones. But
it's just really nice to
I didn't look at it like a science experiment.
be with my friends and
playing
music for kids.
To me, he'sjust an interesting and cool person.
And have it not be
about money, or anything like that.
valid. I think (Max] brought to the mainstream this discusAre you planningto collaborate
with your girlfriend,Bitch
sion in a sympathetic way, instead of showing this monsteragain?
type character from Silence of the Lambs as a trans person. You She's been working with her band and she did the Ferron
know, just as a human-like
somebody in a human circumrecord-which
was really amazing-and
doing some solo
stance. I think it made it so that ... people who wouldn't norstuff. So nothing's in the works right now. But I am writing
mally sympathize would be able to feel friendly and identify
this screenplay and working on this film project right now
with this character.
with a writer, and we hope to be making it in the next year.
Sounds
likeyou'reveryfondof Max.
Canyoutellusanything
aboutthescreenplay?
Yeah, I love him. [Laughs] He is endearing for me, like a Not quite yet. I will say that it takes place in Los Angeles. [I can't
little brother.
say more] because we're still creating it-you know how that is.
Whatdoyouthinkyou'regoingto missmostabouttherole?
I could tell you something and it could be completely different
I like that question. I think it's like missing a friend-it's hard
(in the end]. But I think we've got something solid now.
to think of one thing. Max changed so much and grew up so Wecouldn'thelpbutnoticeyouhavea coupleofvisibletattoos.
much that I already missed young Max, you know, Moira. I
Canyoutellusaboutthem?
guess I'll miss seeing the world through his eyes, because I feel The ones on my upper arms ... one is the last page of the book
that he's a really empathetic and special person.
The Little Prince-my friend did that for me when I was
So,howdidbeinga partof TheL Wordchangeyourlife?
young. The other one is a road to an open door, which [was
For me it was about evolution, it was about living in the coundone] with just a needle and ink. I did that in Poland and it's
try of my origin and being a part of a conversation, a cultural
just about roads to open possibilities that maybe you've never
conversation, for the first time since I was a teenager. Because
even imagined yet.
I lived away for so long ... it was nice to step into being part of Whataboutyourupcoming
film,Don'tLookUp?
things, of (the] American political discourse, as an artist. It
Yeah, I acted in the film in springtime, so that should be out
changed my life also to be able to act-to challenge myself as sometime in the winter. It's by this guy, Fruit Chan. He's this
an actor and learn about filmmaking and have mentors that I
Chinese director and he's making a-it's not really a horror
could ask questions. It was like going to university for me.
movie. It's a ghost movie. It's about the haunting of a film set,
Tellusa littlebitaboutyourtimelivingabroad.
and I play an assistant director who is there in Romania. They
I played in a punk band, which brought me over to Europe,
are trying to film this [movie] and it's haunted. I think it's going
and I ended up staying over there, and then lived in a lot of to look really cool, too. It was a fun little project to do.
feel
............................................
38
I curve
From
'70s
•
icon to
modern
d aY
dyKon
The life and career of
the notorious Pam Grier.
By Rachel Shatto
Once hailed as the "baddest one-chick hit squad
that ever hit town" Pam Grier is, today, perhaps
most recognized for her role as Kit Porter on Showtime's The L Word. But long before Kit was serving
up chai tea lattes at The Planet, Grier was busy
kicking ass and blazing trails for women in film and
TV. Having forged a career out of playing strong,
sexy, savvy ladies who buck oppression and refuse
to be put in their place, Grier has carved out a
space for herself in both pop culture and feminist history. And the real Pam Grier? Well, let's just
say-Foxy Brown ain't got nothin' on her!
May 2009
I39
>...
0
....
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u,
C
_.,, C
a;-~
·...
... a,
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Ee
a.
Although born in the United States, Grier was an Air Force
brat who spent most of her youth living on military bases in
England. Grier recalls that in Europe, the color of her skin
did not translate into inequality. Having been sheltered from
racial discrimination, Grier was shocked when she returned
home at 14 to live in Denver that the buses refused to stop
for her and her mother.
At 18, in an effort to generate college tuition funds, Grier
entered a beauty pageant. The only African American contestant, Grier knocked out the competition and caught the eye of
a Hollywood agent, who brought the budding star to Tinsel
Town. Soon after, while working as a switchboard operator
at American International Pictures, the striking Grier again
caught the eye of someone who would further her career. In
this case it was the B-movie king himsel£ Roger Corman.
Corman cast her in his women-in-prison film BlackMama,
White Mama. While the film itself is forgettable, Grier's
innate "it-girl" quality meant that her turn as the black mama
was just the beginning .
In 1973, Roe v. Wade was won, bras were ablaze and Billie
Jean King kicked Bobby Riggs' booty all over the tennis
court. At drive-ins and movie houses everywhere, audiences
were introduced to a legend in the making: Pam Grier in her
iconic role as the revenge fueled nurse Coffy, in the blaxploitation film of the same name.
Following the success of the film, the statuesque star
appeared in a series of payback-themed flicks, including Foxy
Brownand Sheba,Baby.In each, she represented the ultimate
independent woman, free of any man's control. And while
these films have become cult favorites and pop culture touchstones of the '70s, studio executives at the time were not con-
fident that the female revenge formula would be bankable.
"When they first saw CoffY:'explained Grier in a 1975
cover story interview with Ms. magazine, "No one thought it
would make any money. They said it was too depressing, that
the character was too strong and too serious. So, they cut it
up-taking out the most important scenes ... So all you see
is: bang, bang, shoot 'em up, tits and ass, bang, bang, bang. But
they kept saying, 'People will love it now:"
Growing up in the era of blaxploitation, director Quentin
Tarantino remembers in an interview with Charlie Rose
the impact Grier had in these early films, saying, "She really
owned a spot for women, in the '70s with those films that
America had really never seen before or since:'
A dubious guilty pleasure, Grier's early films-which bore
all the hallmarks of the genre-were packed with violence,
sex, zingy one-liners, fierce jumpsuits and feisty catfights.
One notable altercation in FoxyBrowntakes place at a lesbian
bar where Foxy shows one unlucky patron what it means to
have a black belt in barstools.
However, the prize for best all-female smack down (quite
possibly ever) goes to Coffy,in which hair is pulled, breasts
are exposed and razorblades-tucked
into Coffy's carefully
coifed '70s mega mullet-exact their vicious revenge.
What may be surprising to some is how these films, and
Grier hersel£ were embraced by feminists-so much so that
she was the first African American to grace the cover of Ms.
In the article, "The Mocha Mogul of Hollywood;' Jamaica
Kincaid explains how that could be. "Coffy,Foxy Brown an'd
Sheba, Baby have one outstanding redeeming value-they
are the only films to come out of Hollywood in a long time
to show us a woman who is independent, resourceful, self-
C
.,j
•
•
May 26: The Queen
of Blaxploitaton is
Born. Pamela Suzette
Grier is born to
Gwendolyn Samuels
and Clarence
Ransom Grier, in
Winston Salem, N.C.
Ms. Congeniality
goes to Hollywood.
Pam enters the Miss
Universe beauty
pageant and
wins the eye of a
Hollywood agent,
who convinces the
budding star to
move to Tinsel Town.
An E.R.A. near miss.
NOW leaders disrupt U.S.
Senate subcommittee
hearings demanding the
E.R.A. be heard by the
full Congress. The E.R.A.
passes in Congress but
falls short of the states
needed for ratification.
Fierce and Foxy. Lesbian bar
brawls and gladiatorial death
matches abound
in '7 4 as Pam stars
in the B-movie
gold Foxy Brown
and The Arena.
The baddest onechick hit squad hits
town. Pam headlines
the landmark film that
would earn her the title
queen of blaxploitation,
Coffy. Next up: Scream
B/acula Scream.
Roe v. Wade Win. Supreme Court rules
in favor of right to choose.
We're not crazy! The American
Psychiatric Association removes
homosexuality from its category /
of mental illnessesand disorders.
A Feminist Volley. Billie Jean King
serves a feminist beat down in "The
Battle of the Sexes" when she bests
Bobby Riggs on the tennis court.
40
Icurve
confident, strong and courageous. Above all, they are the only
films to show us a woman who triumphs!"
To Grier, it was also a matter of timing, "Coffy and Foxy
Brown are women of another time, literally exalting and
experiencing the goals [won] from the women's movement ...
It's OK for them to be independent. It's OK for them to not
be dependent on a man for validity;' explained Grier.
As the '70s-and the era of blaxploitation-came
to an
end, Grier kept busy with a series of roles in B movies and
Start telling your family members ... your life is changing,
as of this moment:' The diagnosis summoned the memory
of Grier's sister, whom she had lost to breast cancer. "Her
religion wouldn't let her have surgery. She was a Christian
Scientist and she died horribly:'
Having immediately begun treatment at Cedars-Sinai,
Grier recounted the surreal experience of encountering fans
in the hospital, "There [are] bracelets for every division-radiology, chemo-all up and down [my] arm and ... they don't
"Coffy and Foxy Brown are women of another time, literally exalting
and experiencing the goals [won] from the women's movement. It's
OK for them to not be dependent on a man for validity."
made guest appearances on television in The Love Boat and
Night Court. She also took the time to develop as a character
actor, most notably in the Paul Newman film Fort Apache,
the Bronx (1981), in which she showed off her acting chops
with her turn as a homicidal junkie prostitute. However, a
star vehicle continued to elude her.
In 1988, she appeared to be on the verge of a comeback.
Having just wrapped Above the Law with action sensation
Steven Seagal (remember, it was the '80s), she was dealt a
shocking blow: She was diagnosed with stage-five cancer.
Believing she was in excellent health, Grier was in for her
regular annual check-up when her physician discovered the
condition. "Your life hits a wall;' said Grier. "You're going to
die-you've got less than two years. Get your will in order.
Pam's blaxploits end.
Pam winds down
her career of vicious
revenge against "The
Man" with Sheba,
Baby and Friday Foster.
A Mocha Mogul.
Pam is the first African
American to grace
the cover of Ms.
magazine.
G.I. Janes. Women are
admitted to American
military academies for
the first time.
even see that [I'm] an inpatient. They see [me] as the icon:'
While in the hospital Grier suffered a second loss. "My
lover at the time abandoned me;' she recalled. "He didn't
show up. He refused to return my phone calls, my clothes,
my things ... [It] was so painful. It's like, one day you're madly
in love with a person and you live with them for three years
and [the next] they, like, get up from the table and walk
away... Are you going to survive thisr Cut your wristr What
are you going to dot
She did what she always did: Pam Grier rallied. And she
was not alone, both her family and her friends came to her
support (including Miami Vice creator Michael Mann, who
wanted to sneak her downstairs for a ride in his Ferrari).
Grier laughs as she recalls the time Peter Douglas-
Pam gets serious. All camp aside,
Pam showed she has what it takes
as a homicidal hooker in Fort
Apache, the Bronx.
Pryor conviction.
Pam stars with
then-lover Richard
Pryor in the biopic
Greased Lightning.
The pair split
shortly after when
she discovered he
was engaged to
another woman.
October 14: We're here.
We're queer. 75,000
queer men and women
participate in the first
National March on
Washington for Gay
and lesbian rights.
Justice is served. Sandra Day
O'Connor is appointed as the first
woman to the Supreme Court.
Rockin' the (looove)
boat. Pam guest stars
on everyone's favorite
cruise liner d'amour.
Witching hour and a half.
Pam gets spooky as the
Dust Witch in Something
Wicked This Way Comes.
.,.. ___
Lady veep? Geraldine
Ferraro, tapped by
presidential hopeful Walter
Mondale, is the first woman
V.P. candidate.
Miami mama. Pam's recurring
part as NYPD cop Valerie
Gordon on Miami Vice is the best
thing to happen to Crockett and
Tubbs since neon and cuffed
sleeves.
May 2009 j 41
brother of Michael Douglas-arrived in her room and hosted an impromptu party for her and her mother. "He showed
up with a blender and some margarita mix and a bottle of tequila, and they got drunk. And when they turned their backs,
I had some, too. 'Pam, you have alcohol on your breath?''No:
Because I can't have Demerol and alcohol. I was having double shooters:'
Having successfully beat the cancer with a combination
of chemotherapy and Eastern medicine, Grier picked up the
pieces and got back to work, continuing to appear in minor
TV roles, including a recurring character on Crime Story and
Miami Vice and a guest appearance on The FreshPrince of
Bel Air.
With a gift for picking films destined to be cult hits, Grier
also landed a few small but memorable parts on the big screen:
in the homicidal mean girl opus Jawbreaker,John Carpenter's
Escapefrom L.A. and Tim Burton's Mars Attacks.
In 1997, she found herself back in the limelight in the title
role of Quentin Tarantino's homage to blaxploitation, Jackie
Brown.The film introduced Grier to a new generation of fans
and put her back on the map as a marquee actor.
At the time, Tarantino was coming off the massive
success of his film Pulp Fiction, which had catapulted the
all-but-forgotten John Travolta back to stardom. Aware that
the press would draw parallels with his casting decisions for
Jackie Brown, Tarantino made his reasons for choosing her
plain. In an interview with Charlie Rose he recalls saying to
her,"Now look-a lot of people are going to come to you and
they are going to start talkin' this John Travolta business and
everything, and you can't pay any attention to any of that, all
right? This is not about that. This is about you being the per-
feet actress to play this role and that's why you're getting cast.
Not because you won some '70s revival contest:'
In actuality, Grier's playing the title role was a foregone
conclusion; while adapting the screenplay for Jackie Brown
from Elmore Leonard's book Rum Punch,Tarantino intentionally tailored the role to be a perfect fit for Grier, including
changing the character from white to black and changing the
last name from Burke to Brown, as a nod to Foxy Brown.
The film-which many consider to be Grier's best workcast her alongside Robert De Niro, Michael Keaton and
Robert Forster, as well as Samuel L. Jackson, who, in an
interview with US magazine, remembered Grier fondly from
her early films. "I hadn't thought of her as all those [characters she played] until one day when we were doing a scene
and I had my hands on her throat, [and] I realized: Oh, my
God, I'm about to choke Foxy Brown!"
Grier may have reaffirmed her icon status with the success of]ackie Brown,but it wasn't until 2004 that she became
a bona fide dykon by taking a chance on a risky Showtime
project, TheL Word.
Grier plays the part of Kit Porter, an ex-alcoholic and
former '80s musician turned coffeehouse-club owner who
is the half-sister of Bette, Jennifer Beals' character. While
primarily hetero, Kit is frequently dismissed as the "straight
one:' However, in both her brief relationship with Drag King
Ivan Aycock, played by Kelly Lynch, and a botched one night
stand with Papi, Kit explores-and underscores-the fluidity of sexuality, which is a recurring theme in the series. She
also provides an alternative body type to the waifish L.A. glamazons for fans to admire (and drool over).
As Kit, Grier depicts yet another woman living a life
•I
Action Jackson. Pam
stars alongside the
ponytailed martial arts
master Steven Seagal,
as his partner Delores
"Jacks" Jackson in the
'80s action hit Above
the Law.
Down but not out.
Diagnosed with cancer, Pam rallies with
the help of friends,
family and a mixture of
Eastern and Western
medicine.
Class dismissed. In a
road warrior-esque
dystopian high school
of the future in Closs
of 1999, robo-teachers
(including Pam as Ms.
Connors) are enlisted to
calm campus violence,
only to go rogue and get
their student murder on.
Pam gets fresh. Pam
guest stars as an old
flame of Uncle Phil on
The Fresh Prince of
Bel Air.
A women's rights
breakthrough.
Congress passes the
Violence Against
Women Act.
A Camp-tastic voyage.
With the films Escape from
L.A. and Mars Attacks Pam
reaffirms her status as cult
film star maven and fangrrl
fave.
A presidential
copout.
President
Clinton
institutes the
"Don't Ask,
Don't Tell"
policy for gays
in the military.
42 I curve
Female oppression.
Amnesty
International issues
a report on the
status of women in
Taliban-controlled
Afghanistan.
Tarantino's badass tribute.
Pam makes her mainstream
comeback in Quentin
Tarantino's film Jackie
Brown, in a role the director
customized for the actor, as
a nod to her early blaxploitation films.
Albright gets
green light.
Madeleine
Albright is
sworn in as the
first female U.S.
Secretary of
State.
Girls got game.
The first season
of the WNBA. The
next year, Pam
shows her balls on
MTV Rock 'n Jock
Football and a
decade later
she speaks
at the Gay
Games.
unshackled from the limitations that previous women strugto play, "I had my Wii set up in (my trailer]. Daniela (Sea]
gled against. Her character is free to pursue her dreams to be and I would be in there and everyone else would be out there
a musician and, like Grier herself, is a by-product of the femi- working and we'd just be rocking that trailer, laughing and
nist movement. "Kit was living [and] experiencing all of the screaming, playing tennis:'
things that her mother and her contemporaries had opened
And it was on the set that Grier trained her sights on her
up doors for;' says Grier.
next project: a memoir. During a conversation, Jennifer Beals
While the feminist aspects to the role were familiar
suggested that Grier write about her experiences."! had to do
to Grier, when it came to the LGBT community, Grier
the book of my life, about everything I've done and survived.
explained why starring in The L Word was an eye-opening
Good, bad, right and wrong:'
experience. "It used to be 'us and them; and it's now 'ours; so
Unsurprisingly, Grier had little trouble convincing pubI now have a different perspective, and a great respect for the lishers, and the book is due to come out later this year. She
believes the story of how she saved the life of a wounded
education [I received] just from doing The L Word. It has just
been the most magnificent experience-not
only as an actor, horse by rushing it to the vet-in the back of her yellow
but also learning the social and political context:'
Jaguar-dosed
the deal.
At the time, Grier was engaged to and living with comeWhen the series came to an end, Grier expressed her disappointment that they wouldn't be able to pursue story lines dian Richard Pryor, when his beloved horse was attacked
exploring how far women still have to go in many parts of by dogs. "(Richard] was in the road, crying, hysterical. And
I said 'We're going to get this horse to the vet: So we opened
the world.
"We had a lot more stories to tell, and I think we could the four-door and pulled him into the back seat, and ripped
have gone on, easily, two more years. I think we could get into down (Interstate] 405 to the vet in Sherman Oaks;' Grier
recalled, laughing. "People following us [were saying], 'There
other countries [where] women's oppression is still evident ...
and [women can] still be put to death because of being gay are two black people, one's in a bathrobe with a big afro [and]
there's a horse in the back seat of a Jaguar: Yes, I am crazy, I
or lesbian:'
But for Grier, the hardest part of the series coming to a am going to save a life. I don't care about the car:'
Though Quentin Tarantino once referred to the actor as
close was saying goodbye to the castmates with whom she'd
"the queen of women;' and many consider her to be a living
formed such close bonds. She'd become a bit of a den mother
legend (although she is too modest to consider herself one),
to the cast, in particular to actor Kate Moennig, who Grier
Grier is•content to be seen as an artist trying to make a differjokes is her love child with actor Christopher Walken."Don't
let me loose on that man! An egg will find its way;' laughed . ence. "When people respond to me and are passionate about
my work for such a long time, I am humbled by the fact that
Grier.
But unofficial den mother or not, Grier still found time they like what I do, that they share my passion with me:'
'
'
.4
Meet Kit Porter.
A mean girl cautionary
tale. Pam pops up as a
detective searching for
the missing popular girl
in Jawbreaker, a dark
comedy about what
it takes to be the high
school queen bee.
Oops! Pam appears as
Flura Nash, mother of
Eddie Murphy, in the box
office bomb and six-time
Razzie nominated, The
Adventures of Pluto Nash.
Pam joins the cast
of Showtime' s
The L Word as the
notorious Kit Porter.
The Boston queer party.
Same-sex marriage is
legalized in
Massachusetts.
Ghostface thrilla'.
Pam battles
intergalactic baddies
on the red planet
in John Carpenter's
Ghost of Mars. Then
does it up for Bones
with Snoop Dog.
Howdy, partner.
California adopts
a domestic
partnership law.
State of
the unions.
Vermont
becomes
the first state
to legally
recognize
civil unions.
Same work, same pay.
President Obama signs
the Lilly Ledbetter Fair
Pay Act.
Union busting. On May 16,
The California Supreme
Court rules that the state
constitution allows same-sex
couples the right to marry,
and tens of thousands do.
However, in November, with
the passage of Prop. 8, gays
are stripped of their rights.
May 2009
I43
y es say
,
o me, there's not a big
f the human race. I
e out can I be?"
LeishaHailey(Vol.15#2)
on coming out: "After
high school, I started
going to gay bars, but
I'd go in secret. I'd go by
myself after school. And
I was sort of discovering
this life by myself."
RachelMaddow(Vol.5 #2):on
being an out Rhodes Scholar: "I
couldn't have made a case for
myself if I had been closeted. So
much of my political involvement
is tied up in me being a big dyke."
or o.
king nothing
[lesbianism] an
beautiful thing.
EllenDeGeneres
#6) on her first I
film: "Personal
was it Hazel? N
w
EllenPage(Vol.16#7):"I feel like
there's so much negative portrayal
of women in media and film, it's just
great to be doing roles like these. I
mean, what does it say that we live
in a world where 'feminism' is a bad
word? What could possibly be more
patriarchal than that?"
CherryJones(Vol.14 #8):
SarahShahi(Vol.15 #6):"I get so
tired of answering one question
over and over. And that's, 'How
do lesbians have sex?' I mean,
they have sex. Everybody has
sex. How do you have sex?"
"Girls take a lot of shit.
A girl who is a serious
musician who wants
to succeed is a threat.
I've been spit on and
had shit thrown -------"---'~AmyRay(Vol.4 #6):"There are
at me, just for
people who are just tired of doing
being a girl."
benefits; they just want to play
their music. Some people are
scared to stand up for things,
too. I mean you're not going to
get Wynonna Judd to do a prochoice benefit, because a big
country performer is going to lose
a lot of [her] audience by doing
something like this."
LisaEdelstein
(Vol.6 #5):"I've seen
some beautiful lesbians around
town, who are stunning and have
an edge to them that is really
sexy. I don't see that on television
lesbians. I'd love to see that!"
Margaret
Cho(Vol.12#5):"To me, the
lesbian butch is the sexiest thing
imaginable, because she is so defiant
of culture and so defiant of the world
in her sexuality and in her strength
and to me, that's really healing."
PatriciaField(Vol.6 #2):
"So, to me, lesbian chic
just means that there's
a group of lesbians
removing themselves
from the stereotype and
presenting themselves
in a way that people are
seeing as interesting,
attractive and therefore
fashionable."
"Everyone always says,
'So, were you gay in
that?' And I usually say,
'Well, you know what,
I'm pretty much gay in
probably anything I do.' "
JoanJett(Vol.16#6):
7): "The best thi
as to see clearl
o fall in love with
Staceyann
Chin(Vol.11 #6):
"The skinny women are ...
nice to look at-kind of like
dancing beans, you know?
I like to see them shake
their little booties, but I
wouldn't want to take any
of them home."
k.d.lang(Vol.1O#6) "When
All You Can Eat came out,
people just totally read
that as a sexual innuendo.
I was really more of a
statement on my position
with fame, rather than my
position with sexuality."
J.D.Samson
(Vol.14#8):"It's just important to do
what you need to do in your life to keep going.
The things we believe in are not changing and the
ways that we are activists and feminists, that'.s not
changing. I just think it's cool to keep your mind
open and let everybody come to the party."
Tristan
Taormino
(Vol.9 #2):"I can be sexually
turned on by a lot of different dykes: punk
dykes, porn stars, high femmes, but I fall
for butches. Butches melt me, make my
knees buckle, my breath comes up short
just looking at them."
An lesbian traveler searches for authenticity. By Gillian Kendall
HIS MAY NOT be authentic Bali, but it's very nice:' I called
out this observation to my partner across the mosaic-rich,
marbled expanse of our indoor-outdoor bathroom-garden.
Nie was inside our Villa Kubu suite, lounging on the canopied bed and playing with the state-of-the-art, iPod-friendly
sound system. As she tucked the hotel's high-end toiletries
into our luggage, I lit candles and environmentally correct
mosquito-repelling incense sticks. Meanwhile, I was filling up a bathtub the size of our Honda, using more fresh
water than I'd seen for a year in drought-stricken Australia.
I poured in lavender bath salts and strewed the surface with
frangipani petals from the garden. Then we spent several
hours lolling in that decadent amenity. I contemplated the
equatorial stars overhead, observed and felt akin to the overfed, glimmering goldfish in the adjacent pond and listened to
the soothing sound of our waterfall (controlled by a dimmer
switch). The next morning, we swam in our private infinity
pool and then got massaged by tiny, strong, gorgeous women
who afterward, over fresh ginger tea, regaled us with stories
of life on the island. It was luxurious and lovely but not really
authentic-except
maybe for the tea.
On my second trip to the Indonesian island, I was
determined to track down the real Bali, the place beyond the
Disneylandish tourist hubs of the southern peninsula, where
sunburnt Australians throng the streets and hurl away their
vacation money on beer, sarongs and Balinese kitsch. That's
the part of Bali that was bombed in 2002 and 2005, andwhile I was appalled and saddened by the damage inflicted
on the Balinese residents-it's clear why the terrorists chose
that target.
In my search for accommodations and relaxation on trip
No. 2, I was eager to get beyond those beaches and bars and
to discover the real Bali, or what was left of it.
The easiest experiences to have in Bali are the luxury ones,
especially since U.S. dollars stretch so far. If that's what you're
looking for, I recommend the couples' Moonlight Massage at
Laguna Resort and Spa, which is followed by dessert in a
private, heavily canopied outdoor pavilion-bed at the edge
of the beach. In the glowing moonlight, they rub you with
sweet oils, feed you cocktails and chocolate, then leave you
and your partner alone in a Bedouin-style tent to devise your
own amusements.
My in-laws, both competitive golfers who have played the
links around the world, found the Greg Norman-designed
course at Le Meridien both challenging and beautiful. My
father-in-law was particularly taken by the par-4 stretch that
requires a drive across a sea-filled chasm.
Also in the nice-but-not-authentic category, I'd add the
gay ( mostly men's) bars of Seminyak and Kuta, such as Q
Bar or the Double Six Club, and the sumptuous, gay-friendly
Elysian Villas-a fabulous hotel at the pinnacle of tasteful
indulgence and discretion.
But you can spend only so many hours being pampered
before you start to feel the desire for a little nitty-gritty.
After taking in the fantastic food and rice-paddy views at
Waka Gangga, Nie and I took a walk to the local village. We
Bali (clockwise from top left): Catching a ride in the elephant sanctuary; one of thousands of shrines in the rainforest; offerings to
assure good sales at an outdoor market; Tabanan Beach at sunset
discovered that those green, velvety-looking pathways that
so charmingly divide the rice paddies into terraces are actually narrow, stony little ledges that occasionally will cause a
heavy Westerner to fall knee-deep into black, sticky mud.
I lost my shoes, tore the seat of my pants and cut my foot,
which I later had to wash in a tetanus-laden stream. This
was an authentic experience.
That morning we were also introduced to the parts of
Bali that are neither authentic nor nice. Our route took us
@' along streams that seemed to serve as open sewers-in which
people were washing clothes-and
past piles of washed-up
garbage on the beach, just a few thousand yards from the lush
resorts. In Sanur and Kuta, we got tired of being pestered to
buy stuff every time we left our villa. "Take a look! Take a
look!" was the mantra of shopkeepers along every street in
the tourist towns, and they weren't shy about grabbing our
UJ
arms to steer us into their stalls, either.
But I learned that hearty greetings are traditional-it's
not
0
just a sales technique to greet people with an enthusiastic
hello and a big smile. The Balinese treat one another with
the same friendliness. I learned how to say "Hello;' "Good
ci
day" and "No, thank you" in Balinese, :md I remembered
how to talk to strangers without assuming they were after
g
g
t
Fora surreal
wintryexperience,
Sweden's
ICEHOTEL
istheplaceto go.Every
year,beginning
inthelatefall,artists,
architects
andartisans
fromallover
theworldconverge
onJukkasjarvi,
a Swedish
village
justnorthoftheArctic
Circle.
Relying
onlyonfrozenwaterfromtheTomeRiver,
theycreateanart
exhibition,
including
theICEHOTEL
itself,aswellassculptures
onthegrounds
andevenanicechurch.
Starting
withskeleton
structures
madeofwood
andmetal,theseartisans
use"snice"
(a special
combination
ofsnowand
ice)fromtheTometo buildthereception
area,morethan80 rooms,
andthe
Absolut
lceBar.
It's darkattheICEHOTEL
formostoftheday,butthereflected
lightdancingoffthesnowandiceisamazing.
Don'tdineattheICEHOTEL
restaurantinstead,
takea strolla miledowntheroadtotheOldHomestead.
It'smore
casual,
lessexpensive
andprovides
biggerportions
andfasterservice.
Thetemperature
inside
theICEHOTEL
isusually
about-5 degrees
Celsius
butspending
thenightonanicebedis noproblem:
Juststripdowntoyour
longjohns,gloves
andhat,takethethermalsleeping
bagprovided
bythe
hotelintoyourroom,zipyourself
upandhavea greatsleepuntilthestaff
wakesyouwithwarmlingonberry
juiceat 6 a.m.Andyes,therearewarm
toiletsjusta fewstepsaway.
Andasforadventure,
basicdogsledding
isaboutasmuchexcitement
as
you'llneed.Thistwo-hour
rideoverhillanddale,withanawe-inspiring
view
ofthesunandthemoonhanging
intheskyalongside
eachotherasyourace
alongfrozenriversandthrough
snow-covered
forests,
is beyond
astonishing.
Ataround
$300a night,theICEHOTEL
isn'tcheap,butit'sstillinexpensive
as
adventures
go.[Stephanie
Schroeder]
LL
0
ti;" mymoney.
:)
...J
ci
The best experiences were the ones I'd label both nice and
authentic. Buying handmade batik fabrics in amazing prints
and colors rated high, as did the meals my partner's family
enjoyed, which involved heaps of roast pork and sugarcane
skewers of chicken satay, while the sole, stoic vegetarian (me)
111eBest of Bali continued on page 63
May2009j47
Woman vs. Jiatur~
Deep-sea fishing brings out the warrior in one lesbian traveler. By Mary McGrath
TWAS STILL RAINING in Los Angeles. Call it global warming, La Nina or whatever, but it was dismal here.
Outside, it was so gray; you couldn't even tell what time it
was. I was whiter than Casper and way more testy and even
a double latte at Starbucks didn't improve my mood. I knew
I had to get away. Fortunately; I was soon zooming off to
Ixtapa, on the Pacific side of Mexico, looking for an escape.
But little did I know what an unexpected adventure was
awaiting me.
In Ixtapa, I decided to park my bum at the newly renovated
Club Med. Those of you with children should take note. This
place might finally be the babysitter you need. You can drop
your kids off in the morning, do whatever your heart desires
during the day and pick them up in the late afternoon. Once
you're there, you can hit the spa, take cultural tours and, of
course, indulge in lots of outdoor activities while a host of
gorgeous G .O.s ( aka gracious organizers-think
camp counselors) have to guarantee you a good time. No wonder the
parents I met, both gay and straight, looked really relaxed.
I'm a sports junkie, so after playing tennis, snorkeling,
kayaking and swimming, I knew I had to kick it up a notch
and try something new. On my trip to Ixtapa Island, I'd
met Janet and Eli, a couple of gynecologists who were into
deep-sea fishing. I hadn't gone fishing in at least 10 years, but
when they suggested I join them, I couldn't refuse. Visions
of marlin and sailfish came to mind, and, although the trip
seemed safe enough, I knew anything could happen out on
those rugged waters. They' re dark and very deep. Sort of like
in Earnest Hemingway's The Old Man and the Sea.
48
Icurve
The boat embarked promptly at 7:30 a.m. Several
Hemingway stories swirled in my head, and adrenaline
began pumping through my veins. Soon we began trolling the
deep. Within about 15 minutes, the teal waters had turned
darker than twilight as we moved farther and farther from
shore. The resort's rainbow began sinking into the horizon as
our guide, Miguel, began to prepare the rods.
Eli, one of the gynecologists, plopped down into the chair
and waited, his eyes fixated on the water. Barn! He got his
first strike. The line began its gearlike pull and the fish lunged
forward, diving into deeper water. The rod bent, pointing
downward into the ocean.
Its severe arc made it look
like Moby Dick was on the
line. Eli began the dance of
prey versus predator, but he
was making little progress.
The rod continued to bow
and shake until it snapped
free, and Eli stumbled back
into his chair.
"Must have been a huge
mackerel;' he remarked,
because their razor-like teeth
can snap almost any line.
Kyle, our exuberant G.O.,
was on board next, ready to
make up for that first missed
fish. Soon, there was a strike
and he began pulling. We
thought it was a keeper until we saw some feeble flapping
on the surface of the water. Sadly; it was a cormorant that
had mistaken the lure for live bait. The bird whipped its
wings back and forth in vain until Kyle gingerly reeled it in
and brought it on board. He gently removed the hook from
its thigh. The bird scrambled back into the water, waving a
r
thankful goodbye. Dismayed, we set up for the next catch. [
Maybe the women on this trip would have better luck.
Gyno Janet was up next. As a self proclaimed "travel slut;'
with scores of worldly escapades to her credit, she was someone who would 'go anywhere, with anyone, anytime:• Now
that's a nice mantra. I wondered what she was like in her
0
20s. These days, she looked a bit like a cross between Lauren
Bacall and Simone Signoret, and had an attitude to match. I G
knew she was no dummy when it came to fishing. She was a
seasone d pro.
0
She braced herself in the chair and prepared to conquer. z
Quickly, there was a strike. Her rod dipped and dove down- a:
g
g
ward into the deep, her muscular arms churning to and fro
as she drew in her prey. A 12-pound black tuna wrestled on
the line, the gaping hook a menace to anyone who came near.
The fish flapped around wildly, its mouth begging for mercy.
Miguel unhinged the hook and placed the tuna in the bucket.
Score one for the home team.
My turn was next. I've always been a competitive athlete,
especially against men, and I didn't want to let Janet down.
I braced myself in the chair and prepared for battle. Strike,
down he went. I churned the reel as the pull of the rod made
me zigzag wildly from side to side. The line darted to the
left and dashed to the right until I could see the faint shimmer of the fish's white belly shining about six feet below the
surface. I yanked up on my rod and reeled in the line as the
shimmering mass became larger. The dance of light emerged
from the ocean and soon there was a wild squirming on deck,
the creature flailing desperately to get out of the boat. Miguel
grabbed the fish and helped me usher it aboard. Before me
was a 13-pound yellowtail, the length of my thigh, doing the
hully-gully for its life. We managed to get it into the bucket
and I collapsed into the chair. Hemingway would have been
proud.
Then Janet was at bat again, ready for a homer. The pitch,
the strike, and soon she was rounding the bases with another
black tuna. She hauled in her prize, mopping the sweat from
her brow. This one was easily 15 pounds.
There really are few things sexier than a woman wrangling
a very large fish she caught with her own hands.
Miguel was on the prowl for another place to fish and
began steering us toward some menacing rocks. Slowly he
backed the boat toward the thrashing waves as we bobbed
against the hungry tide. I had visions of being churned
beneath its fury. Janet paled as the boat inched closer and
closer to the rocks. If our motor stalled, we'd be goners. The
boat continued its drunken dance as the waves grabbed for
us, hungry in their pursuit. There were no fish here though,
so Miguel fired up the motor and returned to calmer waters.
What was that? A bird? A plane? No, it was a large ray
leaping out of the black sea like a Concorde jet. There it went
again. The dorsal fins of dolphins churned in the distance.
Were there sharks or whales below? Either one could easily
splinter this boat into a pile of driftwood if we didn't get out
of there. The winds had increased and we realized we were
no match for the fish below. Five adults against thousands of
sea creatures? No, thank you. We'd had more than enough
excitement for one day.
As Janet and I paraded through the Club with our bounty, I
felt that I'd discovered something primal in mysel£ I understood the value of those who provide. The warrior in me was
unleashed and well-rewarded. Now I was a bona fide member of a tribe. I decided to celebrate at the clubs that night
and fish for another kind of wildlife.
THE ROAD TO RECOVERY.
____,.__NOTEVERYBODY'S
SURFIN'
NOW----Lesbian athletes talk about discrimination in this laid back sport. By Gillian Kendall
If it's an open secret that an above-average number of
women surfers are lesbian, it's an unwritten rule that queer
surfers keep quiet about it. "Think about it," says one male
Hawaiian surfer who requested to remain anonymous.
"Have you ever heard of a pro, gay, guy surfer?" Indeed, it
was difficult to get queer surfers on the record for fear of
losing their sponsorships.
Surfing careers are short, and so is funding for them. The
few companies that subsidize women's tours, such as O'Neill,
RipCurl, Op, Billabong and Quiksilver's women's brand,
Roxy, have the power to cut a surfer off from her main source
of income faster than you can say,"Dyke next door:'
Of course, that's part of the deal. Surf gear makers don't go
into business to raise consciousness or subsidize alternative
lifestyles: They support winning athletes to promote their
brands. Most pay well, but few are said to be gay-friendly, and
many sources claim that Roxy discriminates against lesbians.
Is there truth to this, or is it just an urban legend?
Johnathan Jenkins, media manager for Quiksilver/Roxy
Australasia, says the brand chooses surfers based on "a
combination of factors;' including "ability, age, appearance,
personality and possibly other lifestyle elements, like skat-
ing, long-board or short-boarding:' Women who embody
the "Roxy spirit;' he says, are "beautiful, confident, alive,
natural and fun. All that positive stuff-intelligent,
capable,
confident:'
None of that "positive stuff" excludes lesbians. And plenty
of dykes look hot in a bikini. So why can't pro surfers be out
and proud?
What would happen if one of those "Roxy spirit" women
turned out to be queer? Jenkins doesn't know. "That's a very
sensitive question;' he notes, and passes it on to Lisa Grey,
Roxy's marketing manager in Australia. Her answer: In the
case of a sponsored athlete coming out as a lesbian, "Roxy
would continue to support and encourage her:'
Despite the official line from Roxy, sources familiar with
the pro women's surf circuit say that lesbians lucky enough
to receive endorsements stay closeted. They live with their
partners and make no secret
of their orientation until, say,
curve wants an interview.
Then it's don't ask, don't tell.
It's hard to understand
why such pressure still exists
BOOKS
TOGETYOUGOING
in 2009.
Lynne Boyer was born in 1956 and surfed from age
11. After moving to Hawaii, she fell in love with the
sport and started competing on the amateur circuit. "There
was always just a handful of girls back then-it was so rare
to see a girl in the water.
"I started getting pretty good at it. People would ask,
'Why don't you enter the competitions?' So, that's what I
did. My mom would take me to them and I'd do good-first
or second place;' says the two-time World Champion (1978
and 1979).
"But back then all the gay stuff was always in the closet. I
didn't come out until I got clean and sober, in 1981. Through
the (12-step) programs, I figured out that maybe I was gay.
"Before that, I wondered, because my best friend was, and
she tried to get me to be with her. I was very understanding
and accepting when she came out, and then she kissed me
and ... I would end up doing some stuff with her, but I was
wasted and didn't know what I was doing. I'd have the most
terrible hangovers, the worst remorse ... I would hate mysel£
I thought it was very wrong.
"I was very unsure of my sexuality, and I wasn't dealing
with it. (Being gay) wasn't all over the TV. Ellen wasn't here.
It took years of therapy, and more than one therapist, to figure out who I am, and that it's OK. I've met the woman of my
life now. It's wonderful to have a partner; I just love it:'
These days, Boyer is a professional artist who surfs for
fun. It's difficult to know for sure how much the industry
has changed since Boyer was a pro, but she recognizes that
an element of fear still exists. "Some of the gay women surfers
have said they can't (come out), because of the philosophy ...
the (sponsors) cater to young women, with parents, and if
the surfer is gay, the parents won't buy the products. That's
what the fear is:'
What advice would she give to young pros? Should they
come out and risk losing sponsorships, or stay closeted?
Boyer says, "I can't really answer it for other people, but it
depends on the person's strength within themselves, and how
0
good a surfer they are. If they are in high demand and outffi ripping everybody and have that top-award-winning surfer
§I- power in combination with good looks, I would say to go for
it: come out first. But if they aren't in the top one or two,
0
and aren't the model surfer-girl that is in high demand from
the sponsors, I would say to come out afterward in a more
politically-strategic style. Maybe, even with the good looks
Q and champion surfing ability, [they should) come out after, in
lli a more strategic manner.
ii5
"It would probably take someone like Martina
Navratilova. She was already established as a tennis queen
when she came out. It's still kind of backward in the surfing
JayneWilliamsis on a missionto helpyoudiscoveryourinnerjock,
no matterhowmanylayersof doubt,fear andself-loathingit maybe
hidingbehind.Williamsknowsfirsthandthe abjectterrorof wearing
spandexin public,of beingthe lastto finisha raceandwhat it's like to
be a perfectathletetrappedin an imperfectbody.In fact,if thereis a
messiahof fitness,shemightbe it. In herbook,SlowFat Triathlete:
PursueYourAthleticDreamsin theBodyYouHaveNow(DaCapo
LifelongBooks),Williamssharesherloveof sportandhealthymovementwith the sad,downtrodden
andleft behind.Williamswritesin a funny,
engagingstylethat encourages
everyoneto comealongfor the ride.Her
adviceis practicalandempowering,
coveringtopicslike howto avoidchafing,beingproudof whoyouareandlearningto embraceyourbodilyfluids.
Amen,andpassthe Gatorade.
If you'dratherheadto the gymthanintothe
greatoutdoors(read:avoidweatherandbugs),checkout TheNewRulesof
ForsytheandAlwynCosgrove
Liftingfor Womenby LouSchuler,Cassandra
(Avery).Didyouknowthat womengenerallyrecovermorequicklyfrom
intensestrength-training
workoutsthanmen?Orthat our musclefibersare
essentiallythe sameas men's,so a mananda womanin the sametraining
programgainstrengthat aboutthe samerate?Unfortunately,
if youvisit any
gymyou'llseewomenusingteeny-tinyweightsandkillingthemselvesonthe
Stairmasterinsteadof unlockingtheir awesomestrengthpotential.Thisbook
will helpyouunderstandwhystrengthtrainingis importantfor everywoman,
why it won't turn youintoa she-hulk,why intensestrengthtrainingburns
morecaloriesthancardioandhowbeingstrongwill helpyoulive longerand
better.[HeatherRobinson]
community. Nobody's done it yet. It just takes one brave
soul with star power and lots of support from family and
friends behind her:'
For now, it doesn't look like anyone is willing to take the
plunge, but there is a whole new generation of talented athletes who might be able to open the closet door for women's
surfing. One of these is Stephanie Lay, a built, petite surfer
who came to the Aloha state from Texas and a tough background. Even though her mother was an out lesbian, she
found it difficult to come out hersel£ "It wasn't a blessing, my
mom being gay. It was hard for me to come out," she says.
"I associated homosexuality with irresponsibility:' Having
found a new home and a new way of life in Hawaii, she surfs
for fun and makes her living as a personal trainer. At 29,
she says she's not looking to go pro. "Surfing is like going to
church;' she says. "It's where I go to pray:'
Another potential rising star is Kayko Tamaki. Like Lay,
she hasn't gone pro, but she seems to embody the"Roxy spirit:' Born and raised in Hawaii by Japanese and Jewish Italian
parents, she looks part Polynesian, part Egyptian. She's a
go-go dancer-model-events planner-bartender whose latest
venture is riding very big waves. Glamorous, polyamorous
Tamaki loves to long-board and has worked a surf instructor for Japanese tourists. Of the current don't-ask-don't-tell
scenario for gay surfers, Kayko says, "That's so sad:' She
suggests that it's common for women athletes to love and
appreciate their own bodies, and to love other women, too.
She compares pro surfing today to basketball and tennis a
few decades ago. "Surfing is a relatively new pro sport for
women, and, over time, I'm positive it will
May 2009
I51
·--------THEWAYOFTHEPUCK----~
Brush up on your hockey dyke culture on and off the ice. By Mette Bach
you might expect. Homophobia, for example, is not their
main obstacle.
"It happens;• says Naylor. "But it's nothing above and
beyond what might happen anywhere, like occasional strange,
disapproving looks:'
Nancy Drolet, who played on Canada's Olympic team,
actually came out and got married to her longtime partner. When the media showed up to crash her wedding, she
deflated them by stating that her sexuality was never something she kept secret. Drolet, who started playing ice hockey
at a young age, made an exceptional climb in the ice hockey
ranks. The pinnacle of the sport for women is the few Senior
Women's League teams spread across North America. They
don't get salaries, sponsorship or media attention, so many of
them also have day jobs.
Professional hockey according to the National Hockey
League, is simply not played by women, lesbian or otherwise. While homophobia may not be a problem, sexism
is still alive and well, and being denied a chance to play
professional hockey hits hard on many levels. The social
implications are huge, but it's the
monetary ramifications that are the
most prohibitive. Women who play ice
hockey face the huge financial burden
that is hockey equipment. The gear can
cost well over $1,000 if you buy it new.
Even resourceful women will tell you
it's worth it to shell out for new gear,
often quipping, "Have you ever smelled
Across the country, hockey enthusiasts share a passion
ignited by ice, kneepads and long, wooden sticks. Regardless
of whether we consider ourselves players, spectators or playoff widows, it's hard to deny the importance of the sport in
the lesbian community.
Hockey works on a lot of levels. You don't have to play
the game to consider yourself a hockey dyke. Some hockey
dykes make bets, some wear
jerseys and have favorite teams,
while others are mostly in it for
the beer and the socializing.
The sport is a way of life for
Wanttoimpress
thatcutehockey
dyke?
many lesbians.
Here'swhatyouneedtoknow:
''A woman would have to be
HOCKEY
101: THEBASICS
extremely special for me to pass
up a playoffs game to be with
her;' says hockey fan Mel Bissell.
Otherwise, she would be at
home glued to the television for
the duration of the postseason.
Ice hockey player Steph
Naylor not only watches the
sport but also throws most of
her energy into playing. "There
is nowhere I would rather be
than on the ice;' she says.
The challenges facing hockey
dykes, they say, are not the ones
52
Icurve
• Hockey
season
isSeptember
through
March.Playoffs
arepostseason
andcanlast
untilJune.
enthusiast
during
a game.Yourrespect
for
thegamewillmeana lottoher.
• Youdon'thaveto havea favoriteteam,
butit'sa nicetouchto knowa thingortwo
aboutyourhometeam(eitheryourcity's
teamortheteamclosest
to yourcity).If you
arestuck,it is safeto saythatyoulovedthe
Edmonton
OilersduringtheGretzky
era.
• TheNational
Hockey
League
iscomprised
of30teamsthatcompete
witheachotherto
gettotheplayoffs,
wheretheycontinue
to
compete
withoneanother
fortheStanley
Cup. • Also,it neverhurtsto knowa fewfacts
aboutSidney
Crosby.
• Therearethreeperiods
to a gameand
thebreaksbetweenthemarejustcalled
breaks,nothalftime.
Neverreferto these
breaksas halftime.
• Evenif you'reskeptical,
venture
outtoa
hockey
gameanyway.
Often,mini-doughnuts
andbeerareinvolved.
• A hattrickiswhena playerscores
three
goalsinonegame.It'sa bigdeal.
• If you'regoingtowatchyourcutedykeplay
hockey,
remember
todresswarmly,
cheer
loudly
andneversmellhergloves.
• Nevercallortextmessage
yourhockey
PLAYING
THEFIELD
used hockey equipment?"
Players generally pay a seasonal fee for
ice time, which, depending on where you
live, can also be steep. Some teams compete,
which can mean incurring traveling costs,
whereas others, who play mostly for fun, use
all their rink time for games.
Ice hockey has a reputation for being
aggressive and violent. Like many professional sports, it is considered a man's game, but
many women who grow up in figure skating
have spent years ogling their brothers' knee~
pads and hockey sticks. Rachel Young, who
has played for a team called the Slamazons
in Vancouver, British Columbia, for a year,
thinks socialization is key.
"My parents wanted me to take ballet;' she
laughs. Now, ice hockey is one of her favorite
pastimes. Interestingly, many of the women on her team share her story of finding
hockey later on in life. The Slamazons boast
z0 that they have had teammates ranging in age
from 18 to 50, yet none of them were raised
0
a:
<(
I
in the sport. Now their diversity, along with
(.)
t;. their community spirit, fosters an inclusive
zUJ
0
environment in which they reclaim the game
zUJ
I
they wanted to play as kids.
(.)
"Of course, hockey can be aggressive;'
UJ
a:
Young
says, "But it doesn't have to be:' The
::i
::s NHL famously encourages aggression even
u.i
Cl
though the reprimands for it can be tough.
cE
(/)
People seem to want to see professional hock:i:
1tef ey players get black eyes from fistfights or
z
::i
g take a puck in the mouth and lose some teeth.
Maybe that is why they are paid the salaries
UJ
z
that could keep an entire village of lesbians
I
::i
thriving. The truth is that the aggression in
CD
z
ice
hockey depends on the players. On recc3
reational teams like the Slamazons, winning
:,,:
(.)
isn't everything. The women want to have fun
0
and improve their skills. And more competi<(
:J
tive recreational teams will rarely tolerate the
kinds of violence seen in the NHL. Most
0..
queer women simply don't have that kind of
0..
<(
I
(.)
health insurance.
z
0
Across the nation during playoff season,
a:
u.i
countless dykes belly up to countless bars
Cl
cE
UJ
to cheer on their favorite teams and hang
ten
with
their friends. Watching the game with
0
0..
(/)
(/)
_J
_J
(/)
I
_J
0..
0
The Way of the Puck continued on page 63
As a seniorassociateathleticdirectorand
a senioradministrator,NonaRichardsonis
secondin chargeandthe highest-ranking
femalein the athleticdepartmentat the
Universityof California,Davis.Sheoversees
five men'sandwomen'ssportsprograms,
strengthandconditioning,sportsmedicine
andstudent-athletesupportservices(complianceandacademicservices).Sheis also
an out lesbian.
As a new hirefrom the Midwestjust
overa yearago,the attractive,48-year-old,
unmarriedwomanknewthe questionswere
coming,so shedidn't hesitateto informthe
universitythat her partner,Terri,would be
comingwith her whenshe madethe move
out West."It is funny howtime, age,relationshipsand locationaffect your mindset,"
Richardsonsays."I spentthe previous30
yearsnot addressingmy sexualityto others
within the profession,with the exception
of thoseI alreadyhada commonalitywith.
Makingthe movefrom the Midwestto the
WestCoast,wherethe imageis acceptance,
seemedto makethe timing right.Addressing
it up front is easierthan denial,or [facing]
morequestions."
But it wasn't alwaysthat simplefor
Richardson.
Whenshewas a star volleyball
playerat MichiganStateUniversityin the
early 1980s,Richardsonlived in an environmentwherepeoplerarelycameout, except
to eachother.Whenshewas a volleyball
coachat Kentucky,Valparaiso(Indiana)and
EasternMichiganuniversities,the fact that
shewas a lesbianmayhavebeencommon
knowledgeamongthe networkof coaches
and administratorswho were gay,but it
was not talkedaboutor givenup freelyto
employers.
"If you are singleandolderthan 30,
you hearthe talk andseethe looks,"says
Richardson.
Theoptions,she says,are to
"standup, moveon or file suit."
Richardsongrew up in the projectsin
Albany,N.Y.,the middlechild of a single
mother.Thefamily receivedwelfare-issued
blockcheese,rice and powderedmilk. Her
exceptionalathleticability was a catalystfor
opportunity."Vollyball,a virtual anomalyto
me growingup,hasprovento be my savior."
In thosedays,mostAfricanAmericankids
were steeredtowardbasketballor track.
But Richardsonwas a biggerthreat playing
volleyball."At MichiganState,I was the only
AfricanAmericanon the JVteam,"shesays.
Sheand anotherAfricanAmericanmadevarsity as sophomores,
then shewas the lone
AfricanAmericanduringher last two years.
"Overall,I felt that I was supportedfrom
teammates,the coachingstaff,administrators andalumni,"shesays.Shewas named
MVPandchosenas co-captainat Michigan
State,but evenmoreimportantly,shewas
the first from her generation,in her immediate family,to attendcollegeand graduate.
Whileathleteswere moreclosetedthen,
"you still havecoacheswho will recruit
negativelyagainstindividualswho are
perceivedas gay,"saysRichardson."It is
gettingbetter,but thereare still barriersto
cross."
Transitioningfrom beinga student-athlete
to a careeradministrator,Richardsonwent
from beingarounda close-knitgroupof
femaleathletesto workingwith administrators who,shesays,are predominantlywhite
andheterosexual,
andoverwhelminglymale.
"Youhearhowthey talk, you see howthey
act, you knowwhoseworld you are in," she
says."Youhaveto pick your battlesand
knowwhento showyour hand,whenit
doesn'tmatter."
Movingto the WestCoast,she admits,
madeit seemeasierto be an out lesbian.
"It is eitherthe olderI've gotten,the less I
concernmyselfwith who knows,or I feel
that the WestCoastis a little moreaccepting,"shesays."I havegivena little in both
directions.I will admitthat conservatism
andtraditionalvaluesrun rampantin the
Midwest."
So howcan a lesbianstudent-athlete
knowwhichschoolsarethe mostaccepting?"Collegesacrossthe countryadvertise
that they are a diverseinstitutionand invite
a diverseapplicationpool,"saysRichardson.
"Thisdoesnot necessarilymeanthat they
are gay-friendly,but I think the morediverse
individualsthey haveamongthem,the more
they realizethe differencesare minute.
"Gowith your passion,"she advises."Do
not sacrificewhat you haveput your heart
andsoul into,for what othersmaysayto
discourageor distractyou. If you do not fit in
at oneinstitution,thereare hundredsmore
out there."[LaurieK.Schenden]
May 2009
J
53
.,........_..._-HOT
ANDHEAVY
FITNESS-----·A workout that will have you workin' it like never before.
By Heather Robinson I Photography by Cheryl Mazak
Do you ever wish you could pay more attention to how
hot your partner is, instead of how exhausted you are-or
that cramp in your forearm or that ominous twinge in your
lower back? For many of us, sex is the most athletic activity
we regularly participate in, but we never train specifically
for the game of love.
The following workout was designed to improve your sex
life. Do it consistently and you will increase your strength,
endurance, flexibility and (most importantly) your confi-
dence. Improving your fitness will boost your energy level,
encourage you to try glamorous new positions, give you
more staying power in your old favorites and allow your
inner sex goddess to come out and play.
There is nothing sexier than feeling fit. Do this workout
two or three times a week and your body willbe ready for anything your dirty little mind can come up with. And remember,
the best sex workout of allis having sex, so get busy, ladies.
Whatyou'llneed:An exercise band and a yoga mat or an
exercise pad. Sexy music with a solid beat and nonrestrictive clothes will also be helpful.
Beginners:
Perform each movement for 15 to 30 seconds,
resting after completing one set of each exercise; that's one
circuit. Do the entire circuit two to three times. As you get
stronger add more time and shorten the rest periods. Cool
down with the flexibility routine.
More advanced:Perform each movement for 45 to 60
seconds (with the exception of pushups, do 10 to 20 of
these). Do the circuit two to four times with two to four
minutes of jumping rope, jogging in place or jumping
jacks in between. Cool down with the flexibility routine.
STRENGTH
CIRCUIT
Always warm up with five to 10 minutes of walking, jogging or other gently rhythmic movements-we're sure you
can think of something.
PUSH-UPS:
Oneof the bestmovementsfor developingupper
bodyandcorestrength,includingthe abilityto holdyourselfup,
which is a very handyskill to have,indeed.Keepyourbodyin a
straightline by clenchingyourbutt musclesand pullingin your
stomach,while keepingyour handsalignedwith yourshoulders.
Beginnersshouldstart from a table-topposition(kneesdown,
at a 90 degreeangleto yourbody);moveon to the modifiedand
then the advancedtoe position.
PLANKS:
Thisis a staticmovethat develops
stabilityandendurance
in yourbump-andgrind department.Cometo the top of your
push-upposition(armsextended)andhold,
onceagaintighteningyour butt andyour
stomach.Tryto get your bodyin a straight
line. Beginnersstart on bent kneesand
elbows,thosemoreadvancedcantry it on
handsandtoes.
54
Icurve
HeatherRobinsonis a certifiedstrengthandconditioningspecialist.Readherfitnessblogat www.workoutsf.com.
FLEXIBILITY
HIPTHRUSTS:
This is a reverseplankexecutedon your back.
Keepyour heelscloseto yourbodyandyourarmsrestingalong
side.Pushyour hips up as high as you can while squeezing
your butt and pushingthroughyour heels(this activatesyour
hamstrings).Holdat the top or pulseup anddown.If you're
advanced,try lifting and extendingoneleg at a time in the air.
BANDPRESSES
(notpictured):Anchoryour bandarounda
stationaryobjectlike a couchor heavytable leg. Graba handle
and get into the push-up,in the tabletop or kneelingposition.
With your palmfacingtowardyour bodypressforwardin a
punchingposition,makingsureto keepyourarm closeto your
bodyandyour neck in alignmentwith your spine.Repeaton
the otherside.
BOATBICEPCURLS:
Froma seatedpositionwith
an anchoredbandin eachhandengageyour
abdominalmuscleswhile leaningbackand lifting
yourfeet a few inchesoff the floor.Withyour
elbowspinnedto your sidescurl your handsup
towardyour shoulders,while keepingconstant
tensionin the band.
WRISTCURLS(shownstanding):Holdingboth
handlesin a seatedpositionlay yourforearms
alongthe tops of yourthighs,with yourwrists
hangingoveryour kneesandyour palmsup. Curl
the bandbacktowardyour body.Flipyour handsover(palms
down)and repeaton the other side.
We all know it's important to stretch, but hardly any
of us do. The problem is that without flexibility training, as we get older things start to tighten up and we
lose range of motion in our joints. This translates into
fewer options, and more chance of injury in the bedroom- and nobody wants that. Hold
each stretch for 30 to 60 seconds.
BABYSTRETCH
(notpictured):Lie on your belly
with your kneesbentas wide apartas you can and
your big toestouching.Thegoalit to openup your
hips and get your kneesand butt closerto the floor.
CAMEL:
Kneelon bothkneeswith the tops of your
feet on the groundandsupportyour lower back
with your handsas you leanback.Youwill feel a
stretchin your lower backand in the fronts of your
thighs.If you can,openup your chest,leanall the
way backand rest your handson your heels.If
your kneesare sensitive,you can do the back bend
from a standingposition.
CHESTOPENER:
Lie on
the floor with your hands
behindyou,slightly
wider than yourshouldersand lift your
hips,while keepingyour headaligned
with yourspine.Tomakethe stretch
easier,bendyour knees.
COBRA:
Lie on your
stomachwith your
elbowsbentandyour
handsin front of you. Gentlypressyour hips into
the ground,archyour backand look upward.As
you becomemoreflexible,beginto straightenyour
armsfor a moreintensestretch.
Showing us the ropes
are our sizzling models:
(above right) dancer
and personal trainer
Sarah Bush (www.
sarahbushdance.com)
and (left) bartender
and culinary student
Christina Cabrera
If youhaven'tdoneanyexercisein a whilecheckwith youdoctorbeforestartinganythingnew.
May 2009
I55
REVIEWSMusic Watch
Co-Ed Combos
Gals and guys mixing it up for results you'll like. Trust us. By Margaret Coble
I UsedtoLovher,
Shire(Hot
CityMusicGroup):
Shire
(pronounced:
she-ray),who
fansmayrecognize
as Chinky
in theshort-lived,
Sisq6producedgirl bandLovher,has
sincereinvented
herselfas
a soloartist-and a Sapphic
dabblingone,at that.A
powerhouse
voicethat'sequal
partsraspandhoneypropels
herdebutsingle,"I Usedto
Lovher,"
asShiredescribes
theall toofamiliarhighsand
lowsof thetoxicon-again,
off-againfirst girlfriend I usually tend to focus on female soloists or all-girl Dig That Treasurewith more dreamy yet downright
experience.
Andwitha hook bands, but every now and then you just have to shake
unconventional sounds. The lead-off"Tail & Main''
like:"Webrokeupandgot
things up. This month's female-fronted groups mix is an indie-pop ditty with rockabilly overtures, via
backagain,butnowI know
up the gender composition of their bands and the autoharp, jangly guitars and galloping snare drums.
this is the end.I believedin
musical genres in their sound.
"Blue Tears" is a somber but fun rave-up, while "The
her,wouldhavestuckwith
her,tattooedon mybelly-I
Loving Sun'' is a moody, mellow distortion-fest. With
will neverforgether,"it's
Fruit,The AsteroidsGalaxyTour{SmallGiants):The influences as diverse as Broadway show tunes, classihardnotto "lovher."If you're Asteroids Galaxy Tour's jangly feel-good anthem
cal music and psychedelic '60s and '70s film scores,
in the marketfor an R&B 'i\.round the Bend" is a perfect introduction to the sixthe sound is truly other worldly, but strangely accesbreakupanthemanddon't
piece female-fronted indie band from Copenhagen,
sible. (www.myspace.com/cryptacize)
feelparticularlyrepresented
Denmark.
The
rest
of
their
10-track
debut
is
equally
by Beyonce's
"Puta Ringon
psychedelic and danceable, merging pop sensibility Menagerie,
NousNon Plus (Aeronaut):
Even though
It," thenthis maybejust
the post-splitheartache- with classic soul stylings and trippy funk rock for the bulk of this 13-cut disc is in French, the twosoothingtuneyouneed. an infectious sound. Band founders Mette Lindberg gal, four-guy band is actually from New York City.
(www.myspace.com/ and Lars Iversen only started working together two The band is led by Celine Dijon, a vocalist of Swissshireuniversalj years ago, but with such high-profile placements German and Chinese descent who grew up in Paris.
[RachelShatto] as Apple commercials and TV shows like Gossip
The other band members hail from various American
Girl, the cat's already out of the bag. "The Sun Ain't cities. "Loli" is a gritty indie-dance-rock-meets-'60sShining No More;' with its sweeping strings, horn
French-pop-meets-The-Jam
body shaker, while
blasts and slinky basslines, is already a radio hit in "Catastrophe" goes a more bouncy, electronic '80s
the U.K. Nearly every track has hit potential here. French New Wave route. Several songs mix French
(www.theasteroidsgalaxytour.com)
with English, including the humorous crush-ode
"French Teacher;' and"Le Dandy;' with its airy tropicalMythomania,
Cryptacize
(Asthmatic
Kitty):With a simi- flavored pop. Most cuts fall in the glam-pop-punk
lar retro and cinematic vibe, but a more atmospheric
category, with detours into sleaze-disco-but they're en
z
art-rock direction, this female-led San Francisco Bay all infectious, sexy and fun. This one is not to be ffi
Area trio follows up its critically acclaimed debut
missed. (www.nousnonplus.com)
g
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56
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Q+A
Smokin' Hot
Dolorata
Lea Delaria gives jazz hands new meaning.
Attention jazz fans and foes alike: There is still at least one groovy chick on
the scene and she's well worth giving jazz another listen. Lea DeLaria, the
butch of all trades, has served up yet another delightful performance on The
Live Smoke Sessions, her second album, with 12 new jazz renditions done
DeLaria-style. Early last fall, I headed to Smoke Jazz Club on the Upper West
Side of Manhattan, where the album was recorded, to enjoy a
smoky glass of wine and see DeLaria perform.
Most will probably recognize DeLaria from her in-your-face
stand-up comedy, her roles on television (most recently on
Law & Order: Special Victims Unit) and the big screen, and her
Broadway career. Clad in a pinstripe suit and wing-tip shoes,
she took the stage in front of a receptive audience she affectionately identified as "jazz club virgins" (um, was it that obvious?) and thanked us for coming out.
"It looks more like a gay night in Chelsea in here than a jazz
club," she joked. On the other side of this edgy comedian is
a lovely jazz diva who took control of the room with her sultry
voice. She can definitely belt out the notes, but I was impressed with her
soft, controlled performance in "You Don't Know What Love Is." It was the
perfect mix-strong, quiet and hypnotizing. My favorite song was her rockin'
version of "Miss Otis Regrets." It had a seductive beat that got my booty
moving in my chair. It was a song you could dance to in a club or, even better, naked in your living room. I'm definitely a convert. [BreeClarke]
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linestitch)
(if
Anjulie
Anjulie
(HearMusic)
Thisself-titleddebut
from the 26-year-old
MontrealR&Bsinger
showsgreatpromise.
The lead-offsingle,
"Boom,"hasa Nancy
Sinatraretrovibe
that's fun and booty
shaking,while others
on the 13-cut disc,
like "Rain,"go a more
urban-radio-friendly
R&Broute.A strong
debut.(www.my
space.comlanjulie)
TheLiving
andtheDead
JolieHolland
(Anti/Epitaph)
A foundingmemberof
the BeGoodTanyas,
theTexas-bred
Holland
offersupa soloalbum
filledwith hermesmerizinghybridof folk,
country,jazzandindie
rock."Palmyra,"
a
prayerfor the brokenhearted,and"Corrido
porBuddy,"abouta
friendwho'sfalleninto
addiction,areboth
achinglypoignant.
(www.jolieholland.com)
Whether they're opening for the Stooges at
San Francisco's iconic Warfield or commanding the stage at She Riffs, the five hard
rockin' women of Dolorata are dynamic
musicians. Lead singer and guitarist Katie
Colpitts took a break from planning the
tour for their album, Believer,to chat.
Whatis it likefor an all-femalebandin
SanFrancisco?
I think a lot of times you play shows and
people see all women and they expect
something-it's usually not us, for some
reason. A lot of times we get booked with
female events, you know, with other either
women-fronted or all-girl bands.
Wheredidyournamecomefrom?
Dolorata comes from the Madonna
Dolorata, which is Italian for the mother
of sorrows. My grandmother prayed to the
Dolorata that if she had a girl she would ...
pray to her every week for the rest of her
life. So she had a girl and she named her
Dolores. I remember as a little girl, every
Friday she would do her prayers. But I
didn't name [the band] for religious purposes. It has a lot more to do with the faith
and strength of a woman.
Whatareyourfavoritevenuesin San
Francisco?
Bottom of the Hill ... Red Devil Lounge ...
El Rio-that's a really great community
spot. We had the privilege and honor to
play the Fillmore and the Warfield. We
opened for Iggy Pop and the Stooges.
Our friends are in a band called Sistas' in
the Pit, they were on tour with him. At
Thursday's show ... they were like, "We
have this emergency situation and we're
not going to be able to play. Can we give
them your namer Would you be ready to
go Saturday nightt It was on Iggy's 60th
birthday. It was totally epic. [NinaLary]
REVIEWSIn the Stacks
ht New Possibilities
A historical novel and a tale that will go down in history. By Rachel Pepper
Spanning more than a century of history, from the
start of suffrage to the stirrings of the. transgender
reproductive rights movement, these books will open
your eyes to other ways of life.
The Sealed Letter, Emma Donoghue(Harcourt):
Donoghue, the author of several fine lesbian novels
including Slammerkin, continues her tradition of litWetlands,
CharlotteRoche
erary excellence with her new book, The Sealed Letter.
(Grove/
Atlantic):
Based on a real legal case that gripped England in
Roche'sdebutnovelhasal1864, The Sealed Letter explores the scandalous
readysoldover1 millioncopand very public divorce case of the unhappily wed,
ies,hasbeentranslatedinto
27 differentlanguages
andis
free-spirited Helen Codrington, who was ultimately
oneof the mostprovocative found guilty of infidelity. Divorce was still a rarity in
booksI'vereadin a very,very
those times, when women and children were regarded
longtime.In it, 18-year-old
as men's property, and the women's suffrage movement
bisexualHelenis hospitalized
was in its infancy. Besides being a legal tale, The Sealed
aftera shavingaccident,and
Letter
is also a story of the friendship and its betraywhiletheresheruminates
on
al-that
between Codrington and"Fido" Faithfull, an
herbodyandits exploitsin
graphicandunsettlingways. unmarried "woman of business" who runs a printing
Rochesaysshegotthe idea press in London. Despite Codrington's importance
whilesittingona friend's to the story, it is Fido who provides the moral center
toilet."I pickedupa tubeof
and the book's pivotal intrigue-she
is a lesbian in
soapandwasshockedto
a time where such things were not mentioned, and
discoverthatit wasdesigned
rarely acted upon. Drawn into her friend Helen's
cally male, Beatie transitioned from female to male in
specifically
for cleaningthe
web
of
lies
as
well
as
drawn
to
her
personally,
Fido
the mid-'90s, and has lived legally as a man ever since,
vagina.I beganto think,'My
God,am I theonlyperson must choose what path to follow-her conscience, or even marrying his female partner, Nancy. Having
leftwhodoesn'tusepussy her heart. As always, Donoghue gets all the period
chest surgery was a given for him, but unlike many
soap?'"Wetlandsis Roche's details right, through a combination of scruputrans men, Beatie chose to keep his female reproscatological
counterattack lous research and well-honed talents as a writer.
ductive organs, suspecting that he would one day
to ourultra-sanitized
world.
Donoghue's 1860s London is rendered so realistiwant to give birth to a child-especially
since his
Scandalous,
compelling
and
cally that readers can almost smell the polluted air, wife could no longer do so. After going off testosteraltogether
disturbing,
this is
a neweroticliteraryclassic. see the fog, hear the character's accents and feel the one, and restarting and regulating his menstrual cycle,
Beatie was able to conceive easily, although his first at(www.groveattantic.com)stirrings of a new political era in the wind. Generally
tempt ended in an ectopic pregnancy. After conceiving
[DianeAnderson-Minshall] intimidated by the thought of a 400 page historical
novel?
Not
to
worry.
The
Sealed
Letter
will
ease
you
again,
but feeling shunned by both the medical and
) Formorepicksfromother
shores,visitcurvemag.com.
in gently until you realize you're caught in its grasp,
the LGBT community (Beatie writes that his "biggest
only to be released in its final, surprising last pages. disappointment ... was the reaction of gay and lesbian
(www.emmadonoghue.com)
groups and the transgender c~mmunity"), Beatie, who
had been an obscure figure in the LGBT activist comLaborof Love,ThomasBeatie(SealPress): munity outside his native Hawaii, decided to go pubMany curve readers will remember
lic. After the small-town-Oregon resident pitched his
Thomas Beatie from the tabloids-where
story to the gay media, and it was subsequently picked
he was known as "the pregnant man:' His
up by the international press, Beatie found himself in
sudden appearance in magazines and on a firestorm of publicity, some of it very hateful. The
talk shows last year sparked heated conver- LGBT community has indeed had a hard time with
sation both within and outside the LGBT
Beatie, in particular because of his assertion that he
community. Although not born biologi- and Nancy were "private" people who nonetheless
58
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made themselves spokespeople, and also with
his claim to be the first pregnant trans man, an
untrue statement that he amends in his book
by saying he is the "first pregnant husband:'
So, then, what to make of this book, a detailed
autobiography of a less than exceptional life,
especially when Beatie was young, including
photos of his mother and accounts of family
pets? It's all a long pleasant prelude-sad family tragedies notwithstanding-to
the part of
the story most readers will be impatiently expecting, 10 chapters and close to 200 pages in.
The good news is that the book, co-authored
with a barely credited Alex Tresniowski, is
well-written, and therefore wading through
hundreds of pages of information that could
have been handled in one chapter is at least
enjoyable to read. Beatie comes across as compassionate, brave, loyal and loving, all good
traits in any parent-so those looking to fault
him will probably reconsider if they read his
story and gaze upon the sweet family photo
included. Now that Beatie has ridden the publicity bandwagon as far as it will go, Beatie's
story will at least serve as a noteworthy document of a time when the topic of trans reproductive rights was still new-and perhaps just
a little bit shocking. (www.sealpress.com)
ListenBetween
TheLines
Welive in an ageof multi-tasking-we
checkour emailwhilewaitingin line at
the bank,we cookdinnerwhilewatchingthe news,we weara Bluetoothso
we cantalk while we'reon the toilet. But
the latestmulti-taskingtrendis actually
sensible:SimplyAudiobookshasmadeit
possibleto "read" a bookanywhereyou
canlisten.Thinkof it as Netflixfor the
literaryset.Youordera title onlineand
a CDis sentto yourdoor.Whenyou're
finishedwith the book,sendit backto get
the nexttitle on yourlist or buyit for less
thantwo dollars.Youcansubscribefor up
to a yearof prepaidaudiolistening,which
meansthat youcanstart makingup for
thinkingthat Twilightwasjust a movie.
Mostrecently,they havesteppedintothe
downloadarena,offeringtheir libraryin
MP3form,allowingyouto take a digital
bookon the road.SimplyAudiobooks
alsoeliminatesthe wavy,water-logged
pagesthat comefrom readingwhile
takinga bath,sinceyoucankeepboth
handsfree in the tub with the latest
romanceright in yourstereo.It's a new
age.Books-they're like the newmusic.
[AinsleyDrew]
BLINDED
""' LIGHT
MORGAN
HUNT
Blindedby theLight
MorganHunt
(AlysonBooks)
Thethirdmystery
featuringTessCamillo,
an amateurdetective
whovisitsthe Lightning
Field,an art installation
and,aftera particularly
badthunderstorm,
finds
oneof hercabinmates
dead,but notfromthe
storm.Thestoryis
:::,
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told in the noirstyleof
a:
CD
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detective
Q.
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but
with a
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lesbiantwist andliberal
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[Kathilsserman]
lntersex(ForLack
of a BetterWord)
TheaHillman
(ManicD Press)
It's utterlyimpossible
to notbespellbound
by performer-activist
TheaHillman,in person
or in print.In lntersex,
shedocuments
her
ownsearchfor self
andshowsthatqueer
culture'sobsession
with "samesex"or
"oppositesex"as categoriesis sometimes
a bit meaningless.
A
must-read.
(www.manicdpress.com
) [Diane
Anderson-Minshall]
BetweenTwoWomen
BandFags!
FrankAnthonyPolito PatriciaHarrelson
Press)
(Kensington
Books) (Outskirts
Thisbreezyfirst novel After33 yearsof marfollows"bandfag" Jack riageandthreegrown
children,theauthor
fromseventhgradeto
of this memoirfallsin
hisfreshmanyearof
college,as hisrelation- lovewitha womanbut
continues
to struggle
shipwith hisbest
After
friendBradblossoms withhersexuality.
andbuckles.Contains strikingupa friendship
with Carol,a 69-yearcheesylyricsand
olddyke,Patriciaoffers
soapoperadebacles
liketryingto convince to transcribeCarol's
seniorsyouknowwho oralherstory.Carol
givesPatriciaa context
theViolentFemmes
are.You'lllaugh.You'll for lovingandfills her
cry.You'llcringe.(www. with hope.(www.out[Kl]
kensingtonbooks.com)skirtspress.com)
[Andrea
Millar]
Q+A
Susan Gabriel
Susan Gabriel, the
author of Seeking Sara
Summers, delivers a
phenomenal story line
in her first adultfiction novel. In this
intimate story of selfdiscovery, when Sara
(Summers) Stanton, a
loving wife and mother
develops breast cancer, she realizes that
she's been living for everyone but herself
So she sets off on a trip to Italy to visit
Julia, her childhood best friend. To her
surprise, she finds herself falling in love
with Julia and starting down a path to
find a more meaningful life.
Whyisthewomanonthecoverheadless
andholding
anartichoke?
Because Sara is someone, like many of
us, who needs to get out of her head
and more into her heart. The artichoke
makes sense because it has an amazing
heart at the center of it, but there's all
those prickly petals that you have to get
through before you can get to the heart.
Sara's journey is getting to the heart of
who she really is as an authentic person.
DidyoufeellikeSara?Wereseekingyourselfwhileyouweremarried?
I definitely felt that I was on that search,
too. So many women know this. It's where
you just know instinctively that something is missing and somehow you have to
find whatever that missing piece is.
Howdoesbeinga formermarriageandfamilytherapistinfluence
yourwriting?
So many women who sat across from
me in the counseling office were at a
crossroads in their lives, which is where
Sara is in the book. I feel like I've not
only lived it firsthand, but witnessed it
from other women.
Howwouldyoudescribe
yourwritingstyle?
I start hearing voices in my head, like a
dialogue going on between the characters and that's how I know if something
is viable or not. I believe that stories
choose us instead of us choosing stories.
[LaKeisha
Hughes]
May 2009
I59
REVIEWSSapphic Screen
The MonsterWithout
Undone wrestlers and zombie savants grace the screen. By Candace Moore
TheEarlyWorksof Cheryl
Dunye(FirstRunFeature):
I am nothyperbolizing
when
I saythatfilmmakerCheryl
Inside
Dunye'sStranger
is oneof the mostunderratedlesbianfilmsof all time.
Wrenching
andriveting,it hit
all the rightmarkswithout
everbeingpreachy.
Those
whoknowDunyeexpect
nothingless,butthe director
herselfis a bit marginalized.
Criticsarequickto pigeonhole
her(thoughcomparisons
to
Lesbian couples are important characters in these
SpikeLee'searlyworkaren't
modern fables about masochistic wrestlers and
withoutmerit),andshe'soften gay zombies.
beenvilifiedbyconservatives
anddismissed
by mainstream
consumers.
ThisnewDVD The Wrestler(Fox SearchlightPictures):In Darren
Aronofsky's viscerally moving The Wrestler, Mickey
collectionis a reminderof
whyherworkis sofunny, Rourke rekindles his star as a "broken-down piece
provocative
andinventive, of meat" we can't take our eyes off 0£ Pumped up,
mixingnarrativewith docuarthritic, swollen, massive and humbled by age, Randy
mentaryin a waythat'sboth
"The Ram" Robinson is a wrestling hero way past his
illuminating
andamusing.
The
sell-by date. To afford pain meds and make the rent
six low-budget
films reflect
on his trailer, "The Ram" stays trapped in a world of
onthefirst chapterof Dunye's
body
slams and selfmutilation. When heart surgery
oeuvre,offeringupa time
opens
up his chest, creating another thick scar, Randy
capsuleon lesbianlife in the
'90s-from datingandvanilla makes changes. He gives up gigs and reconnects with
sexto politicalpotlucks the daughter he abandoned to glory measured in
andracialconstructs. autographs, heavy metal, strip joints and cocaine.
[DianeAnderson-Minshall] Evan Rachel Wood (Thirteen) plays Randy's adult
daughter Stephanie-at
turns wounded, suspicious
and reasonably furious-she's a mess of psychic damage that trumps Randy's physical pain. Whether or
not Rourke and Wood had that Lolita-like romance
on the set, a near-incestuous chemistry charges
the relationship between their ravaged characters
on-screen. Stephanie's live-in girlfriend answers the
door when Randy comes around, judging his intentions and protectively filtering Randy's access to her
lover. Stephanie's lesbian relationship is just another
60 I curve
Q+A
Shamim Sarif
and Hanan Kattan
Screenwriter and director Shamim Sarif and
producer Hanan Kattan are the lesbian fi.lmmaking power-couple responsible for the two recent
cinema gems I Can't Think Straight and The World
Unseen. After 15 years together, the two certainly
know how to play to each other's strengths. Not
only did Sarif write both scripts and the corresponding novels, she wrote two of the songs for
I Can't Think Straight and the couple has even
established a record label, Enlightenment Records,
to produce the soundtracks for both films. And
that's not the last we'll be seeing of this duo. There
is talk of a potential TV spin-off for I Can't Think
Straight, and they're working on two other film
adaptations. "You can't stand still too long with
Hanan around;' jokes Sari£ Indeed.
I Can'tThinkStraightissetin present-day
London
andTheWorldUnseen
is setin SouthAfricaduring
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piece of the film's mise-en-scene; her sexuality is not treated as a
defining feature of her character. As a whole, the film lacks exposition. We are simply flung into its world. A tour de force, The
Wrestler deserves the kudos it has won. (wwwfoxsearchlight.com)
Otto;or,Up WithDeadPeople(StrandReleasing):
Bruce LaBruce
polishes his playful, nee-Marxist, punk-boy porn to its finest
sheen with Otto. His first zombie-themed art house feature is
a visual and auditory wonder (set to an inspired soundtrack
out on Crippled Dick Hot Wax! Records). Otto (Jey Crisfar)
is a young gay zombie who stumbles seizure-like around Berlin,
his green-white eyes awash with light, scooping up roadkill to
munch on. Otto's demeanor aptly reflects LaBruce's metaphor
for the way sensitive types feel under capitalism. He tries to recollect the love he had while he was alive. Answering a casting call
found on a flyer, he crosses paths with the radical film maven
Medea Yarn (Katharina Klewinghaus), who thinks he has real
undead potential and gives him a major role in her movie (within LaBruce's movie). Medea's low-budget Up With Dead People
imagines a gay zombie uprising featuring anatomically absurd
sex and led by the Che Guevara of the living dead. LaBruce
mixes grainy black-and-white footage with rich vibrant color,
representing Medea's girlfriend Hella Bent (The Raspberry Reich's
Susanne Sachsse) as a silent film belle who utters endearments
through inter-tides and picnics with her honey across celluloid
divides. Otto's adventures as king of the landfills, reluctant film
star and would-be martyr are inflected with an existential ennui
fascinating to behold through LaBruce's lens. Occasionally, a
stunning rainbow ironically appears behind our beloved zombie
prince. (www.strangreleasing.com)
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apartheid.
Howdoes
placefit intotheframeworkof yourfilms?
Sarif:I think the sense
of place is highly
important in films
because even though
they talk about personal integrity and,
you know, figuring
out who you are and these types of things ...
I always like to have a bigger backdrop that
sometimes reflects some of that journey.
Somecriticsobjected
to theculturalstereotypesofthefamiliesin I Can'tThinkStraight.
Whatdoyouthinkofthecriticism?
Kattan:To be honest, what Shamim wrote
in I Can't Think Straight is loosely based
on [our] relationship and our familieshow they reacted, what we went through.
Actually, if anything, Shamim toned it
down and not up, because she thought
people would think it was too exaggerated.
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Thispowerful
Reelingfromhermothdocumentary
by Lisa
er's recentsuicideand
F.Jacksontellsthe
chafingat the bit over
storyof five Congolese herorthodoxJewish
rapesurvivors.
The
background,
the brainy
film takesthe viewer Naomiavoidsmarriage
intothe currentcivil
by goingto studyat
warandhowit creates a women'sseminary
an environment
that
in Sated,Israel.While
putswomenat risk
there,shemeetsthe
andexploreshowrape beautifulMichelleand
is usedas weapon.
thetwo startbreaking
Theacclaimed
film
rules-religious,culwasthe winnerof
tural,institutional-left
andright.A thoughtful,
the SpecialJury
Prize:Documentary hopefulfilm, backedby
at the Sundance
Film a rollickingsoundtrack
Festival.(www.theof Jewishfolk music.
greatestsilence.
org)
(www.thesecretsmovie.com)
[KatiePeoples]
[RachelBeebe]
Aneducational
documentarythatchallengesgenderstereotypes
andhomophobia
by
askinga diversegroup
of highschoolstudents
to talkaboutgender
expectations
andhow
theyinfluence
almost
everyaspectof their
lives-from howthey
dressto howtheyact
andwhothey'refriends
with.Thisis anhonest,
eye-opening
filmthat
coversa hugerangeof
issuesandis sureto be
invaluable
to educators
andparentsalike.
(www.groundspark.org/
straight/aced)
[RB]
You'vecastLisaRayandSheetalShethin two
moviesnow.Howdidyouattractthemto the
roles?
Sarif:We did a two-for-one deal. [Laughs]
The process began with I Can't Think
Straight, and I wasn't looking for looking for
Sheetal or Lisa for those roles, initially. In
both cases I found a few actresses ... [but]
when it came down to it they didn't want to
do the love scenes. What I like about both
[Sheetal or Lisa] is when we had conversations about the movie it was always about
the love story, the arc, the motivations of the
character. And I don't remember either one
of them ever mentioning that it was a love
story between two women.
I Can'tThinkStraight
is a romantic
comedy
thatdabblesin themorehard-hitting
topicof
politics.
Doyouthinkyoustrucka balance?
Sarif:Well, I hope so, because I think they
feed into each other in that the cultural
background for Tala is a big stumbling block
in coming to terms with her sexuality. But
I hope it adds another layer to the film, the
politics. So we wanted to kind of bring all of
that in and give it that richness, that cultural
authenticity, if you like. But yes, at its core
it's a love story.
Kattan:But I think also ... Palestinians are
usually portrayed as the terrorists or in
refugee camps. You rarely see the more
educated or affluent or well-traveled, wellversed Palestinians, so she wanted to explore
that as well as the Indian community, which
probably has been explored a bit more in
films and books.
Havetheeventsofthelastseveralmonths
madeyouguysthinkdifferently
aboutincludingthedialogue
abouttheIsraeli-Palestinian
conflictin I Can'tThinkStraighf/
Sarif:No. If anything, I feel even more
strongly that these things need to be out
there and discussed and a dialogue needs to
be opened. Because I think as we can see,
that dialogue is something that is very missing at the moment. [RachelBeebe]
Cl)
May 2009
J
61
REVIEWSTech Girl
Stick Textin Situations
And how to get out of them. By Jenny Lovell
In a wireless society, every lezzie has to keep up and texting is easily accessible. But the
written word can often be mistaken. Text messages lack intonation, emotion and other
indicators that can clarify verbal communication. Here are a few sticky situations to avoid.
Friendship Fumble
Fumble:
You'rein a rushandaccidentally
textyourbest
butchbuddysomething
dirty,insteadof the girl youmet
lastnight.Insteadof callingyououtonyourfumble,she
writesyoubacka flirtatiousquip.
PHONESWAG
Addsomestyleto yourlifeline
by replacingyourcell phone's
backcoverwith a fashionforwardCoveroo.
Choose
an etchedfairydesignand
releaseyourinnerpixie,or
optfor anotherof the 250
designs.Betteryet,youcan
gothe extramileandsubmit
yourownoriginalidea,transformingyourgenericsmart
phoneintoa personalized
conversation
piece.Maybe
that cutegirl you'vebeen
eyeingupwill notice-hey,
it's a greatsegueintoasking
for herphonenumber.
($20,coveroo.com)
[Kimberly
Bale]
Solution:
Nobody
wantsto becorneredunexpectedly
while
a friendexplainsherunrequited
love.Thebetterchoice?
Nipit in thebud.Texta jovialresponse
playingup her
senseof humor.
Tellhershe'shilariousandyou'llseeher
for thegameonSunday.
Office Space-Out
Fumble:
It'sfiveo'clockandasyou'rerunningout
the dooryouremember
youneedto answerthe last
condescending
questionyourbosstextedyou.You
pickupyourphoneandfind histextalreadyonthe
screen.Youcheckyourtextlogandrealizethatthe
litanyof disgustabouthimthatyouthoughtyousent
to yourloyalcoffeebreakbuddyactuallywentto the
onemanwhoshouldneverhavereadit: yourboss.
Solution:
If youfind yourselfin a stickyslip-up,the
bestpolicyis an honestapologyanda frankconversation.
If youavoidmentioning
yourmisdirected
text,youcouldfacemonthsof missedopportunities
andawkwardencounters
at thewatercooler,or even
loseyourjob.A bluntrebuttalwill let youknowwhere
youstandandhopefullyclearupsomeof yourboss's
misconceptions
aboutyourqualifications.
Sweet.The onlythingthat can take my mindoff my
amazinglyincompetentbossis a hot girlthat mixes
caffeinatedbeverages.I swearhe thinksI didn't
graduatehighschool.I'm morequalifiedthan he is!
More Than Words
Fumble:
You'recomingupon ninemonthswithyourgirlfriend
andthe honeymoon
periodis wearingoff.Allyoucanthinkof is
howshesqueezes
thetoothpaste
fromthe middleof thetube
andhogsthe covers.Youanswerherlatestaffectionate
text
witha clippedresponse.
It doesn'toccurto youthatsucha flat
answercouldspelldisasterfor a buddingrelationship.
Solution:
Whenemotionsareonthe line,textingtoo littlecan
a:
leadto confusion
andmisunderstandings.
Don'tplayemotional ::5
5
tug-of-warto getyourway.Withtwo girls,thetendencyto
sidesteptouchysubjectsis high.Someone
hasto womanup
w
<{
andtacklethe issuehonestly.
:r:
u
...J
...J
::J
ct
62
Icurve
The Best of Bali continued from page 4 7
settled for tempeh with peanut sauce. Since
most Balinese people are Hindu and don't
eat meat, I had the satisfaction of eating like
the locals. My veggie meals were not only traditional but also occasionally great, especially
those including pineapple.
While I was having my blond hair braided into tiny cornrows, I was lulled by the
conversation of the women whose gentle
hands were working on my head. Braiding
takes place on the beach, in the markets,
anywhere you want it done, and costs only
about $20 a head. Bali Moon Group took us
for a gentle, two-and-a-half-hour ride-all
downhill-from
a volcano crater. We passed
through villages, ashrams and temples, and
dozens of small, sweet children ran up to call
"Hello! Hello!" At the end of a long day out,
it was nice, cheap and convenient to hop on
a bemo-a tiny bus fitted with elf-size seats.
Rides cost only pennies a mile.
The high point in our search for the real
Bali was Waka Shorea, an eco-lodge that is
the only place to stay in West Bali National
Park. At this fantastic resort ( really a cross
between a Four Seasons and a Girl Scout
camp) there are no cars or roads, so we
had to take a 15-minute boat ride across
picture-perfect turquoise water to reach it
and, after settling into our tree-level room,
we ran straight to the beach to go snorkeling. Underwater we saw blue starfish,
lavender coral and dozens of birdlike tropical fish, while on land we were visited by
troops of long-tailed black monkeys and
an egually stunning wild pig. A mongoose
hung out in the tree near our dinner table,
we trailed a dog-size "mouse deer" on the
beach and I took a jungle trek at dawn with
a park ranger who showed me gigantic blue
butterflies and secretive land crabs. He explained the history of the limestone cliffs,
showed me the tracks of wild animals and
took me to a beach that is off-limits to the
public and houses a breeding program for
Balinese starlings. These tiny white-andblack birds were nearly extinct in the 1980s,
but now their numbers are growing. In a
huge aviary, the little birds were practicing
singing and flying, getting ready to join their
relatives in the jungle nearby. Despite being
bred in captivity, they were clearly ready for
life in the jungles of Bali-and
so was I. I
never wanted to leave the national park and
iil
Waka Shorea-the
part of Bali that's both
z
i3 utterly authentic and very, very nice.
The Way of the Puck continued from page 53
friends is a large part of hockey dyke culture.
It's a bonding activity. Some people place
bets and join hockey pools, others partake in
"playoff pie" (a casserole of layers of potato,
onion and cheese wrapped up in bacon) with
friends over for some super-loud TV time
and beer. Some get so loud, their neighbors
call the cops.
If you are not a hockey dyke but you find
yourself involved with someone who is, and if
you're feeling particularly lonely during playoff season, you might be what is affectionately referred to as a playoff widow. Many of
us have been there. We do our best to sport
a new skirt or fragrance, but try as we might,
we can't seem to compete with the closest
thing there is to a butch soap opera. A wellseasoned hockey dyke can spend hours, days
or even weeks discussing the subject with
her friends. Gossip will go around about
,
pare(
untq
Fertility and life is the rose. the sublime blossom.
the womb from which all enter the world.
Emu, ace yuu1 111a4uifice11t
feminine self.
E~i/,;a1~!1y.
www.feminineprinciples.com
players, coaches and team owners. Hockey
dykes who are into it are really into it. Those
who aren't will find themselves at a loss while
hockey dykes discuss the finer workings of
player trades and coaches and managers who
are moving around.
Is there a possibility that we will see women's hockey turn professional in the future?
The Slamazons think so. As we raise up future generations of hockey players, lesbians
and straight women everywhere might be
encouraged to put on their skates and try to
score their first hat trick before puberty. If
they're anything like Steph Naylor, they will
"play hockey to win and to feel alive:'
May 2009
I63
TOPTENREASONS
WELOVE
...
Keba Drew
This multitalented artist is making queer women of color more visible. By Katie Peoples
Justice/Just Us and Poets Against Rape in
support of rape victims.
2. Shecandance.As a member of the troupes
Mambo Queens and Sisters of Substance,
Drew has shaken her thang in cities like
London, New York and San Francisco, including a performance at In Bed with Fairy Butch.
And she's won the Irene Weed Dance Award
and a Robert Kuykendall Dance Scholarship.
3. She'san activist.As a second-generation
dissenter, Drew has a background in protesting, rallying and fighting for what's right.
Her parents were civil rights activists and,
like Drew, they used their creative talents to
support protest lines and spread the message
in schools.
4. She brings people together.Through
QWOCMAP's film festival, Drew gathers
people from all sides of the LGBT community under one roo£ And gets them talking.
'i\.11these different groups of people end up
mixing," she says. "It's like, 'Oh that's your
story, OK. And that's your community, OK:
And it's such a mixed crowd that it ends up
feeling really amazing:'
Kebo Drew, a queer activist and awardwinning poet, has spent her career covering the
topic of the African diaspora to the Americas.
Her work has given her a unique perspective
on women of color in the queer community
and her activism has led her to become the
festival manager of San Francisco's Queer
Women of Color Media Arts Project.
Through QWOCMAP,
Drew has given
many underrepresented women a place to
have their voices heard. We can't get enough
of her, and here's why.
1. She'sa poet.Andwe knowit. Drew has performed her poetry in Europe and the United
States. She is a Cave Canem Poetry Fellow,
has won the Audre Lorde/Pat Parker Award
and che Astraea Emerging Lesbian Writers
Award, and has performed at venues like
64
Icurve
5. She'sreadyto feedthemediamasses.
After
years of hanging on to Set It Off with Queen
Latifah, Drew says the community is hungry for new images of women of color, and
QWOCMAP
is ready to deliver. "When
we did the Corona Color Film Festival,
because it was focused on queer black women, queer women of African descent, you
would not believe the response," she says.
"People were so hungry, so, so hungry for the
images, because ... the ones that are out there
are not that positive. We're just, like, picking
anything that we can take. But then, every so
often ... these films will come out and people
are so hungry:'
6. She'sa historybuff.Drew's work on the
African diaspora not only spans African
American history, but includes the his-
cory of South America and the treatment of
European immigrants in the United States,
which gives her a perspective on how all these
things are interconnected. "Part of the work
I do is like, 'Well we know that we're divided
from each other, how do we find some more
common cause and really tell the truth about
what is our history?'" she says.
7. Shethinksqueerwomenof colorare more
thanjust "queer.""There's this tendency to
want to think that people lead single-issue or
single-identity lives, and we don't;' she says.
"Especially for queer folks of color-we're
not just concerned about our sexuality, our
sexual orientation and gender identity. We're
also concerned about class issues [and] how
the rest of our community is doing:'
8. She'sovercome
barriers.To get to where
she is today, Drew has dealt with institutionalized racism and shattered assumptions. In
turn, Drew and QWOCMAP have worked
to help people overcome the barriers of race,
class, ethnicity and immigration status.
"We're trying to remove as many barriers as
possible;' she says. 'i\.nd it might not be personal for every one of them, but it's certainly
still an issue for a lot of our communitie;:•
9. Queerness
runsin her family,so to speak.
'Tm actually a third-generation queer," she
says. "I have several cousins and extended
family, and then in my mom's generation and
then also my grandmother's generation. So,
I've actually heard stories from those generations about how it was to be queer and that
history and everything else:'
10. She'screatingvisibilityfor queerwomen
of colorin the LGBTcommunity.
As the festival manager of QWOCMAP, Drew thinks
it's important for queer women of color to
be seen and heard. "I think that sometimes,
within a larger LGBT context, people of
color are a little [bit of an] afterthought...
we're like the colored sprinkles on the white
cupcake;' she says.
2
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10 Powerful Lesbian Politicians
BRID6ESTORE
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curve
THE BEST-SELLING
MAY 2009
I
LESBIAN MAGAZINE
VOLUME 19 NUMBER 4
Publisher and Founder Frances Stevens
EDITORIAL
Editor in Chief Diane Anderson-Minshall
Managing Editor Katie Peoples
Assistant Editor Rachel Beebe
Book Review Editor Rachel Pepper
Music Review Editor Margaret Coble
Contributing Editors Julia Bloch, Victoria A. Brownworth,
Gina Daggett, Sheryl Kay, Gretchen Lee, Stephanie Schroeder,
Rachel Shatto
Copyeditor Katherine Wright
Editorial Assistants Kim Bale, Ainsley Drew, Nina Lary, Andrea
Millar, Heather Robinson
Pam Grier Kicks Ass
I can't believe it's been 19 years since the first issue of this magazine. I alwaysjoke
that I'm too young to have a child this old, but as we start heading toward turning 20, the staff is busy looking back at two decades of lesbian history. Victoria
Brownworth writes eloquently about her time writing for curve (page 32),
which made me want to give a shout-out to her and to Rachel Pepper and
Michele Fisher for being with us since the beginning. How lucky are we?
Another look back-and
a fascinating one to boot-comes
on page 39
in contributing editor Rachel Shatto's interview with actor Pam Grier. Our
time line traces Grier's rise from Air Force brat to blaxploitation star to her
recent turn on that groundbreaking Showtime hit about lesbians-a
life
that so clearly dovetailed with three overlapping civil rights movements (for
African Americans, women and gays). Grier changed America's perception of
women through her bad-ass roles and broke color barriers as the first African
American woman to grace the cover of Ms. magazine and, in doing so, she
changed the world for all of us. Most compelling, is Grier's account of how
her doctor's dire prognosis in the late
she battled stage five cancer-ignoring
'80s (he told her she would be dead in 18 months!) and fighting to live to
become the sexy 60-year-old woman she is today.
Don't miss our mini-section on not-quite-mainstream
sports. Our
editors always have their fingers on the pulse of what's hot and this year they
noticed that more lesbians were complaining about being hockey widows
than ever before, hence the handy primer (page 52) on this lesbo-friendly
sport. Another feature offers an intro to the mostly closeted world of pro
surfing. Stay tuned for an upcoming issue, though, as one of the sport's major
players is planning to come out in these very pages.
Lastly, thanks for sticking with us through these tough economic times.
Your subscriptions mean the world to us, especially now that your dollar is
being stretched a million different ways. Thank you from all of us at curve.
PUBLISHING
Advertising Sales Diana L Berry, Rivendell Media
Advertising Assistants Hannah Bolton, LaKeisha Hughes
Social Networking Lindy Shelton
ART
/PRODUCTION
Art Director Stefanie Liang
Photo Editor Hayley McMillen
Production Manager Ondine Kilker
Production Artist Kelly Nuti
Web Producer Nikki Woelk
CONTRIBUTING
WRITERS
Kathy Beige, Kelsy Chauvin, Jennifer Corday, Lyndsey
D'Arcangelo, Beren deMotier, Michele Fisher, Tania Hammidi,
Jodi Helmer, Kathi lssennan, Gillian Kendall, Kate Lacey, Charlene
Lichtenstein, Karen Loftus, Karlyn Latney, Candace Moore, Aefa
Mulholland, Alison Peters, Catherine Plato, Aimsel L. Ponti, Laurie
K. Schenden, Kristin A. Smith, Dave Steinfeld, Edie Stull, Robin
Miner-Swartz, Kyra Thomson, Jocelyn Voo, Alison Walkley, Melany
Walters-Beck
CONTRIBUTING
ILLUSTRATORS
& PHOTOGRAPHERS
Paul Michael Agular, Michelle Bart, Erica Beckman, Phil Cho,
Cheryl Craig, Tony Donaldson, Sophia Hantzes, Gabriela Hashun,
Janet Mayer, Maggie Parker, Elisa Shebaro, Katherine Streeter,
Kina Williams, Misty Winter
1550 Bryant Street, Suite 510
San Francisco, CA 94103
Phone (415) 863-6538 Fax (415) 863-1609
Advertising Sales (415) 863-6538 ext. 15 or (212) 446-6700
Subscription Inquiries (818) 286-3102
Advertising Email advertising@curvemag.com
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Letters to the Editor Email letters@curvemag.com
Volume 19 Issue 4 Curve (ISSN 1087-867)() is published monthly (except for bimonthly
January/February and July/ August) by Outspoken Enterprises, Inc., 1550 Bryant St.,
Ste. 510, San Francisco, CA 94103. Subscription price: $49.95/year, $62.95 Canadian
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a $25 surcharge. Periodicals postage paid at San Francisco, CA 94114 and at addttional
mailing offices (USPS 0010-355). Contents of Curve Magazine may not be reproduced in any
manner, either whole or In part, without wntten permission from the publisher. Publication of
the name or photograph of any persons or organizations appearing, advertising or listing in
Curve may not be taken as an indication of the sexual orientation of that individual or group
unless specifically stated. Curve welcomes letters, queries, unsolicited manuscripts and
artwork Include SASE for response. Lack of any representation only signifies insufficient
materials. Submissions cannot be returned unless a self-addressed stamped envelope is
included. No responsibility is ass_umedfor loss or damages. The contents do not necessarily
represent_the opinions of the editor, unless specifically stated. All magazines sent discreetly.
Subscnpt,on lnqu1nes:Please write to Curve, 1550 Bryant Street, Suite 510, San Francisco,
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2
Icurve
Read 8nd hear all about it ...
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>> Forward pages to friends and let
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Features MAY2009
34
36
39
44
46
48
50
52
54
Ten Powerful Lesbian Politicians
These women rule. Literally.
By Jennifer Corday
Daniela Sea
The multifaceted artist reflects on The
L Word, playing a trans man and punk
rock. By Rachel Shatto
The Notorious PAM
The Queen of Blaxploitation and L Word
star Pam Grier gives us the scoop on life
as an icon. By Rachel Shatto
Happy Birthday to Us
We've hit our 19th year and to celebrate
we look back on some of the fabulous
women we've covered.
In Search of the Real Bali
Forget the resorts and hit these authentic
spots. By Gillian Kendall
Gone Fishin'
lxtapa, Mexico: offers woman vs. wild
adventure. By Mary McGrath
Sports
Closeted Lesbian Surfers
Hawaii is home to a slew of lesbian surfers, but why do so few come out? By
Gillian Kendall
Dykes on Ice
Queer female hockey fans and players dish
on their love of the game. By Mette Bach
The Orgasm Workout
We've got a workout that will have you
feeling the heat. By Heather Robinson
page
34
"I now have a different perspective
just from doing The L Word. It has
just been the most magnificent
experience."Pam Grier >>
4
Icurve
page 39
Departments MAY2009
A..& •• :--
24
2
10
12
14
21
17
20
22
27
64
Frankly Speaking
Letters
Contributors
26
28
This Is What a Lesbian Looks Like
Open Studio
Scene
30
AstroGrrl
Lipstick & Dipstick
I Tried It
32
Top Ten Reasons We Love ...
56
15
18
6
I curve
Curvatures
Emerge makes for a great party this spring,
a court ruling may open doors to discrimination and great undies for butch gals.
Celebrity Gossip
LiRo on the rocks again? Tila Tequila having
a kid? Thank God for Beth Ditto.
58
60
62
Relationships: Have a happy beard marriage, plus what femmes wish you knew.
Health: We take a new safe-sex product
for a test drive.
Money: The skinny on a lesbo-friendly
doggie day care franchise.
Dyke Drama
How to spot faux lesbians before the
drama begins.
Politics
Do we still need a queer press? Of course!
-
. . .
Music: We let a few boys into the club
house with bands like girl-fronted Straight
Line Stitch. Lea Delaria rocks.
Books: Emma Donoghue and Thea
Hillman wow us with The Sealed Letter and
lntersex. We grill Susan Gabriel.
Film: Queer zombies in Otto. Power
couple Shamim Sarif and Hanan Kattan
take us through their filmmaking process.
Tech: How to get out of a sticky text
message. Plus hot cell phone covers.
Only in San Francisco"
You'llhave so many new storiesto tell, you'll need proof. Find out what's new in SFat onlyinsanfrancisco.com/gaytravel
gay.
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COMING
UP
From the Editor
It's probably no
surprise that the
Curvettes are big
text messagers.
We're often texting
each other with
news tidbits from
pop culture to
Prop. 8 (I think I
texted contributing
editor Rachel
Shatto at 2 a.m. one time, flush
with excitement, to tell her that
two girls on Rock of Love made
out-now
I see that news could
have waited until the morning). I
use texting to expedite things too
•
(i.e. when I run into a writer who
wants to know what happened
to her now 6-month-old soliloquy
on cats, I immediately text
Sheetal Sheth
The actor (above) who wooed audiences-and sultry Bollywood sensation
Lisa Ray-in/ Can't Think Straight takes us behind the scenes of one of
this year's steamiest lesbian romantic comedies.
•
Rejecting the Cookie Cutter
"I'm not your average model," says Lucy Andrews (right),
whose budding career hasn't stopped her from being
herself-from her post-punk 'do to her sexuality.
managing editor Katie Peoples).
But, I've come to see the pitfalls
of texting now that it, along with
Facebook and Twitter, are my
primary forms of communication.
I'm often texting back the wrong
folks, accidentally posting
embarrassing info on my
Facebook wall and telling all the
wrong people what I want to do
to them that very night. Thank
goodness for Jenny Lovell's tips
on surviving text blunders on
page 62. Now tell me about your
worst text blunders-I
can't wait
to hear I'm not alone in texting
"I <3 U" to a crazy old boss!
Diane Anderson-Minshall
Editor in Chief
s I curve
•
Foreign Reads
The scintillating German novel Wetlands caught our eye
this month (see page 58), but we've got a bevy of mustreads from foreign shores on our list. Get reading at curvemag.com.
Are Lesbian Teens at Risk?
Yes, says Elizabeth Saewyc, author of a
University of British Colombia study on
queer teen sexual health (see page 26).
According to her lesbian, gay and
bisexual youth engage in more risky
sexual behavior than their peers,
leading to higher rates of sexual
transmitted diseases and even
pregnancy. Read the full interview at
curvemag.com.
19 Years of Exclusives
To celebrate our B-day we dug deep and
pulled out the hottest celebrity exclusives
we've had over the years (including one with
Margaret Cho, pictured right). The
highlights are on page 44, but the
full articles are on curvemag.com.
Check out our ongoing coverage of the
California same-sex marriage debate
on curvemag.com.
amyray girlinacomadoria
robertsmedusa
elvira
kurt cocomama
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god-des
andshe c.c.carter ganessa
james
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evolution
v lava
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higbievickirandlevaniva
teresa
topptwins nervous
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issa(formerly
sarah
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nicole's
blaKbushe
po'girl shelley
rachael
davisaleah
long
gloria
bigelow
ginabreedlove
melissa
ferrick chixlix:60'shit
May 2009
I9
LETTERS
it takes to weather these economic
times-and someday we might just
show up in your neck of
the woods with sub cards in
hand!
Takes Me Back ...
Hard Times
Thanks for the passion and effort you have
put toward this publication over the years.
We are writing to you because we saw the
"Hunkering Down" letter from the curve
founder ["Frankly Speaking," Vol. 19 #1]
and we would certainly be saddened beyond
words if your publication went
down in these hard economic
times. Our subscription is already
arranged through
December
2009, so we were thinking of
other things we could do to help.
There are two well-attended gaylesbian bars in the Cincinnati,
Ohio, area (Adonis and the Yadda Club)
and we wanted to offer to take posters,
subscription sign-up cards, whatever you
have or recommend, to those establishments to help propel subscription readership in our area. Hang in there, curve!
- Laura and Jenn Dougherty, Cincinnati
Editor's Note: It's readers like you who keep
us kicking. Don't worry, we'll do whatever
I
I was browsing through
your website when I came
across the famous people
section. Then I saw her
name: Cris Williamson. I
was a student at Syracuse
University in upstate New
York, and in 1973, at a small
bar-pub on campus, I saw
Williamson
perform. I'd
never heard of her, but she
was great. The next act was
Loudon Wainwright III. I
am glad to hear she is still
performing
and
doing well. Thanks
for showcasing her
on your site.
- Peter, via email
This was nothing like I thought the
final season would be. I wanted them
to go back to the really good
stuff from seasons one, two
and three-those
characters and story lines (and the
How's your economic
gratuitous sex scenes!).
outlook for 2009?
- lUV2bOWL21
Poll
49%
Well, I am a Jenny fan. If
she had not been on The L
Word it would have been
very boring to watch. Her
26%
I'm lookingintoorgansales.
character is almost the only
one who has developed
14%
and· stirred up the very
2009is lookinggoodfrom
boring and predictable life
whereI'm standing.
of the other characters ... !
11%
must also say thanks for
Recession?
bringing us The L Word. It
Whatrecession?
is amazing that they came
through and made it. And
According
to a curvemag.com
poll
also, thanks to them we
have gotten more visibility
in film, music, TV, etc.
-Anonymous
I'm makingsomecuts,
but overallI'll beOK.
The L Word Online Debate
This was a very disappointing season, with little romance and another crazy
round of personality transplants. Seriously,
Ilene Chaiken [creator of The L Word] is an
Aaron Spelling knockoff.
-Anonymous
It's so painful to watch Shane and Jenny
together. I spent the whole hour yelling at
the TV.
-Anonymous
RANDOM
QUOTES
FROM
LETTERS
WEAREN'T
RUNNING
... If the mother wants a boy and physical prize is a girl the
child will develop female-male transgender (lesbian) tendencies. Their actions are mind over matter to
satisfy a mother'slove. -lee Harvard Zesch, las Vegas
Since the Texas Department of Criminal Justice doesn't pay their prisoners for our slave labor, it would also
be nice to get a free subscnpt1on to curve to share with everyone here! -Paula Witherspoon, Iowa Park, Texas
10
Icurve
"This was nothing like I
thought the final season
of The L Word would
be. I wanted them to go
back to the really good
stuff from seasons one,
two and three-those
characters and story
lines (and the gratuitous
sex scenes!)."
Snail Mail by Numbers
Because some people care
enough to send a letter ...
1%
Letters written in rainbow colors
2%
Letters
with
biblical
quotes
1%
Strange and
disturbing
"press
releases"
1%
Notices from
prisons informing
us that they've
censored our
content for the
inmates
LUCIE
BLUE
TREMBLAY
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STUKPDESI01'.COM
CONTRIBUTORS
'Tm always dropping books in the bathtub. I can't look my
librarian directly in the eye because I'm embarrassed;'
says editorial assistant AinsleyDrew,who reviewed Simply
Audiobooks' books~on~CD rental service ("Listen Between
the Lines;' page 59). "This kind of service is something I can
definitely use:' Writing the piece introduced her to a whole
new way of obtaining reading material. "I hope that one day
people will be able to rent a book of mine;' she jokes. Drew
also works as half of the copywriting team known as Ministry
oflmagery and writes bi~weekly blog,Jerk Ethic.
While she's a fan of The Wrestler, (see her review on page 60)
media critic and longtime curve film review editor Candace
Mooredescribes herself as "constitutionally incapable of watch~
ing Mickey Rourke get staple gunned:' As a child she stapled
her own thumb and was duly fascinated by those dark little red
holes. Despite this youthful interest in masochism, Moore still
watches certain scenes from between her fingers. A Ph.D can~
didate in cinema and media studies at UCLA, she focuses on
representations of queer women in TV. She has articles pub~
lished or forthcoming in CinemaJournal, GLQ; ProductionStudies:Cultural Studies of Media
Industries, TelevisingQueer Women and Reading the L Word: Outing ContemporaryTelevision.
"I wanted to be famous, but I guess I wanted a hysterectomy
more;' says columnist MicheleFisher,who became a civil servant
in order to get health insurance. ''After the surgery, I realized that I
had become soft. I had latched onto the government teat and I was
unable to let go:' After discovering that she'd traded her dreams
for a dental plan and pension, Fisher decided it was time to get
real job, so she started writing for curve. "My mom was thrilled.
Now, she calls me to tell me how funny Ellen is:'
We're Still Putting Out
I
I
Asusual,theCurvettes
have
beenbusybeesoverthe last
few months.Ourmulti-talented
musiceditorMargaretCoble
tookpartin President
Obama's
inaugural
artshow,Manifest
Hope,inWashington,
D.C.last
January.ChecktheNewOrleans-based
artist
outat www.artbymags.com
...Therehavebeen
severalnotabledevelopments
onthe literary
front:Contributing
writerJodiHelmeris celebratingthe publication
of herbookTheGreen
Year:
365SmallThingsYouCanDotoMakea
BigDifference
(www.us.penguingroup.com)
...
Twoof ourcontributing
writersofferupcomingof-agenovels-Lyndsey
D'Arcangelo's
The
Crabapple
Tree(www.alphaworldpress.com)
andA.J.Walkley's
QueerGreer
(www.wordclay.com)
... Editorin
chiefDianeAnderson-Minshall
penned
theintroduction
to Lisa
lannucci's
EllenDeGeneres:
A
Biography
(www.greenwood.
com)... Contributing
writer
MyraLavenue
foundedTwo
MomsandtheOregon-based
groupParenting/
Pregnant
Lesbians
of Portland
(akaPLOP),
the
latterof whichalreadyhas150familiesinvolved(www.ploppdx.wordpress.com).
Youcan
findTwoMomsat www.momslikeme.com
...
Finally,in a morerisqueturnof events-andafter sixyearsof searingonlinepresence
at www.
nofauxxx.com-queer
porndirectorandcurve
contributor
Courtney
Trouble
is celebrating
the
releaseof herfirstfull-lengthno-holds-barred
DVD,Roulette.
ANNIVERSARY PHOTO CREDITS PAGE 44 NAOMI KALTMAN/SHOWTIME (HAILEY) POWER UP (SHIMIZU) RHEA ANNA
(DIFRANCO) ALI GOLDSTEIN/MSNBC (MADDOW) PAUL MICHAUD/SHOWTIME (SHAHI) GREG GAYNE/FOX (JONES)
COURTESY OF HRT (RAY) AUSTIN YOUNG (CHO) DJAMILLA ROSA COCHRAN (ETHERIDGE) SOPHIA WALLACE (CHIN)
JERI HEIDEN (LANG) HANK HOFFMAN (TAORMINO)
CURVATURES
CU[~atU[8S~---.--Party for a Cause
If you're craving a big lesbian event this spring but
can't make it to Dinah Shore or AquaGirl, check
out Philadelphia's premier annual women's party,
Emerge, which takes place May 1- 3 as a part of the
weeklong Equality Forum.
Emerge provides a night of revelry with purpose:
The funds raised are donated to LGBT organizations
in need. Emerge's sponsor, the Sapphire Fund, aims
to support the efforts of organizations that contribute
to the health and overall well-being of LG BT organizations in the Philadelphia metro region. This year,
beneficiaries include Foyer of Philadelphia, which
'
•B
works with LGBT homeless youth; the Mazzoni
Center, which is Philadelphia's LGBT health center;
and the Adoption Center of Delaware Valley, which
focuses on helping same-sex couples adopt.
This year, Emerge's entertainment is geared toward
showcasing the region's hot lesbo-queer DJs, with
DJ Cozmic Cat headlining. The action happens at
Transit Nightclub, where the ample dance space
ensures an abundance of hot ladies on the dance
floor. Corinne Thornton, one of the lead organizers,
says that Emerge is "the more urban version of [other
lesbian] parties:' Meaning there may not be a pool or
palm trees, but Emerge aims to be an "inclusive party
that makes all people feel welcome;' says Thornton.
That feeling of openness is what drew Cozmic
Cat back for a second year, after wowing the crowd
last year. "What makes the event so special for
me is definitely the organizers ... Last year's party
was an amazing, multifaceted, three night affair.
I've never met such a fantastic, hardworking, and
enthusiastic crew so dedicated to the cause. They
made me feel so much like I'm part of something
wonderful and huge, and that I'm very proud to
support:' [MarcieBianco]
v Bo o s
Strikinga balancebetween
formandfunctionis toughwhenyouhavebuttflossononeendof thespectrumanduglymen'sboxersontheother-it's easyto wonderwhethertherereallyis a middlegroundin
the underwear
aisle.Butthere'shopefor yourtopdraweryet,evenif youdon'tgoinfor laceandbows.
Fitfora Queen:
Lesbo-owned
SizeQueenClothing's
boxers
comein bitchin'fabricslike
chopperchicksandhoney
bears,withrobesto match.($27,
www.sizequeenclothing.com)
BoyNamesforGirls:Youmight
notlikehavinga guy'snameon
yourintimates,
butgaydesigner
AndrewChristian's
bad-assbriefs
will changeyourmind.($6andup,www.andrewchristianshop.com)
FortheUrbanDyke:Butches
inthe
knowalreadysportDykesintheCity's
killerthreads-whynottry someofthat
streetstyleunderneath?
Theseboxer
briefsaremadeforwomen,withouta
frontopening.
($15,ww.ditc.net)
Southern
Comfort:
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($25,www.southernproper.com)
ButchyBumper:
If youliketractors,you'll
likeGinchGonch'sLoaderDumpercollection.
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26%
Number of
curvemag .com
readers who think
Lara Croft is the
sexiest superhero.
The Tomb Raider
babe beat out stiff
competition: Xena,
Catwoman, Wonder
Woman, Tank Girl
and all the chicks
from The X-Men.
the rundown
Utah's Mormons might not be supporters of LGBT rights, but their governor
Gov.
JonHuntsman
Jr.drew
is. Republican
sharp criticism when he came out in support of three gay rights bills in February
and stated that he supports civil unions ...
A recent survey by Harris Interactive
found that LGBT
consumers
are still traveling despite the economic downturn. Hets
are cutting back more, which may explain
why they are often so darn cranky... Paris
Hiltoncontinues to work her way down
her "attention whore to-do list"and can
now mark off"make
out with a hot model
in public:' The heiress
was seen nuzzling
model Cheyenne Tozzi
as they traveled in
Australia. Not to be
outdone, British pop
star LilyAllen(left)
admitted to "snogging"
lesbian identical twins in the February issue
of Gay Times... An Iranianlesbian
has been
granted asylum by the U.K. after her girlfriend was arrested and sentenced to death
by stoning. She was denied asylum last
year, but her case was reconsidered at the
urging of a high-profile campaign involving
gay rights groups, members of Parliament
and British media ... A member of a blooddrinking
vampire
cult and her girlfriend
have been sentenced to life in prison for
the sexually motivated murder of their
teenage housemate in Australia. Suddenly
your roomie doesn't seem so bad after all...
Like the writer it was named for, the Oscar
WildeBookshop
(below right) is coming to
an untimely end. The Greenwich Village
institution, believed to be the oldest gay
and lesbian bookstore
in the country has
closed its doors ...
r ::
,
.
,
Chennai, India,
recently launched its
first dedicated lesbian
which was
helpline,
inspired by the suicide of a lesbian couple
last year. Finally,some help for ladies who
love ladies on the subcontinent ... Poet
Laureate
KayRyan's
wife of 30 years,
Carol Adair, passed away in January.
[Heather
Robinson]
Discrimination Passes the Test
After being expelled from California Lutheran High School in 2005 for
lesbian behavior, two girls sued the school on grounds of discriminationand lost. In January, a California Court of Appeals upheld the decision that
the private religious school is not subject to anti-discrimination laws that
would have protected the students, whose names have not been released.
"It's a disaster;' says Kirk D. Hanson, the lawyer for the girls. "It's a
disaster not just for sexual orientation but also for anyone of any class. Any private school can
discriminate on any basis they want, whether it's sexual orientation, medical disability, skin
color or anything else. It's horrible:' Content found on MySpace tipped officials off to the
intimate relationship between the girls.
"This school's core purpose is religious education;' says John McKay, the attorney for the
high school. 'i\llowing them to attend this school would be the same as walking around
handing out pamphlets that say God doesn't exist. Lutherans believe homosexuality is a sin:'
Parents send their children to the school to be educated in an atmosphere consistent with
their religious beliefs, McKay says. Hanson argues that this ruling could have a damaging
effect on the girls and other LGBT youth.
"It tells them they're not legitimate, that something is wrong with them;' he says. The girls
are currently attending college and Hanson says a petition to the California Supreme Court
is in the works. Thankfully, this position is not representative of all Lutherans. Herchurch
of San Francisco, for example, belongs to the progressive Evangelical Lutheran Church in
America and has LGBT pastors and leaders.
"It saddens me every day that within much of Christianity, homophobia coupled with
patriarchal and domination structures and practices leads to all kinds of forms of oppressions, as well as beliefs and systems that perpetuate them;' says Herchurch pastor Stacy
Boom. [Kimberly
Bale]
The Gaydar
Here's a taste of lesbians in pop culture this month.
Who missed the mark and who was right on target?
neOpie'sshowat
genheim-weloved
hercontemporary
hotosstraddling
the
.tt~~r.,t
16
Icurve
Prop.8 donorsask
foranonymity.
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I
SCENE
1 Revelers at Lavendermagazine's First Thursday party, at the
W Hotel, Minneapolis 2 The Carolina Storm's Angela Walter
goes for the end zone 3 Face off at the Kelly McGillis flag foot~
ball championship in Key West 4 Wanda Sykes speaks at the
Come Wearing White, Leave Seeing Red rally in Sacramento,
Cali£ 5 L Wordstar Rose Rollins introduces her mom to the
crowd at curve's L Word party 6 Guests at an L Word pre~
rnier in Minneapolis 7 Contortionist, Blaze, at Portland, Ore:s
Super Queer Lusty Fun Xtravaganza 8 Lindsay Lohan at the
premiere of Filthand Wisdom 9 Attorney Gloria Allred (left)
and lesbian activist Robyn Tyler at the Sacramento, Cali£ rally
10 Filmmaker Liliana Hueso speaks at San Francisco's Reels
of Resistance event 11 San Francisco premier of Straight/aced,
a film tackling gender stereotypes amongst teens
May 2009
I 17
LESBOFILE
Fromthe Heart
The celeb action keeps us guessing this month. By Jocelyn Voo
told Usmagazine.com, 'i\.t this point in my
life, I wouldn't say one way or another what
my preference is sexually:'
Rumors started circulating after O'Day
brought a woman to an industry launch party
in December and then referred to her as her
girlfriend. Earlier that month, O'Day brought
another woman to a New York party.
"The only thing I'm looking for in life is incredible passion and honest love... no matter
what options are on the table;' she said. 'i\.ll I
really operate on is the way I feel in my heart
when it comes to love:'
KissandTell
BiggerReallyIs Better
Child'sPlay
High-fashion magazines like Vogue are known
for the wafer-thin supermodels and celebrities that grace their covers. But for U.K. stylist Katie Grand, former editor in chief of the
now-shuttered British style tome Pop, bigger
is better. So who should grace the cover of
the first issue of Grand's new fashion glossy,
Love, other than The Gossip
frontwoman, BethDitto?Sure,
it's not the same as when she
posed nude on the cover of
NME in 2007, but it sends a
clear message to fashionistas
on this side of the pond (hint:
eat a sandwich already!).
According to Usmagazine.com,
everyone's favorite bisexual, Tila
Tequila,proclaimed her intention to follow in the footsteps of
Madonna and Angelina as far
as expanding her family goes.
"I definitely want to adopt a
boy;' she said, but admitted that
she wanted to make "at least
another billion dollars" before
then, so she could spend all her time focused
on him. We'd suggest spending some of that
dough on a nanny. Consider the one time she
acted as caretaker. It didn't end so well.
"I had a dog, but I had to give him to [my]
best friend, because he did not like to travel
at all;' she said.
Maybe starting off with something
simpler would be a better idea ... maybe a
houseplant ...
Special"Friends"
Leave it to Ellen DeGeneresto sneak a
Prop. 8-laced joke into an awards show. This
past January at the 35th Annual People's
Choice Awards, she took home the trophy
for Best Talk Show Host in stride, giving a
verbal nod to everyone during her acceptance
show ... including "my roommate, Portia,
thank you very much, as well:'
18
I curve
AnotherCelesbian
"ComesOut"
Step aside, LindsayLohan.We've got a new
switch-hitter on our hands! AubreyO'Day,a
former singer in the girl group Danity Kane,
Even though she's previously been married
to musician Chris Robinson and romantically linked with Owen Wilson and Lan~e
Armstrong, in January KateHudson
heard rumors that she had been macking on a woman, which the actor heartily denied.
'i\. girlfriend called me and
said, i\.re you making out with
girls now?' I was like, 'What are
you taking about? No, no, no;"
she told Us magazine. "Strictly
boys for me!"
Damn. Now, mom Goldie
Hawn ...
LiRoSplit?
Consider the LiRo love boat
run ashore. Word on the street was that the
twosome was already in couples therapy
to nurse their relationship back to health.
However, according to TMZ.com, Lindsay
were heard
Lohanand girlfriend SamRonson
arguing 'til 4 a.m. in late December, culminating in the sound of shattering glass and
Ronson screaming, "If you're gonna break
things, get out of my house:'
Rumors of a split deepened as Lohan was •
seen cavorting around both coasts with Sean
Penn, sans Ronson. But Lohan denies every- :
thing, writing on her MySpace blog, "We did •
NOT break up;' adding that media and gossip
outlets should get their stories, er, straight.
She Said
, pride
T film fests,
ures & more!
Book Online: DAMRONVACATIONS.COM
or Call today: 1.888.850.6585
ASTROGRRL
Go for the Gusto
Venus and Mars rub-a-dub and expand the love all through May. By Charlene Lichtenstein
Taurus
(April21-May21)
Sex:You have a secret admirer who may make herself
known to you this May. Of course some things are
better left romantically mysterious. Career:Hidden
enemies are discovered, disarmed and conquered
at work. Now that you have them where you want
them, what will you do with them? How about corporate Siberia?
Gemini(May 22-June 21)
Sex: Girlfriends get you into all sorts of mischie£
Good thing too-you are getting far too staid and
conventional. Nothing that a little taste ofleather and
chains can't cure. Career:Mentors at work give you a
helping hand and you are very grateful. Whether it
leads to more is up to you.
Cancer(June22-July 23)
Sex: If love finds you in the supply closet, let the
paper clips fall where they may-just as long as they
SEEING THROUGH don't fall into the lap of the big boss. Career:You can
THE BULL be as aggressive as you need to be to advance this May.
It might be nice to be on top and flex your muscles.
Taurusthe Bullis an earthy
womanguidedby insatiable Harder! Harder!
appetitesthatstriveto beamply
fulfilledwhetherit's for love, Leo(July 24-Aug. 23)
companionship,
lust,food,drink Sex:Exotic love waits for you in some far-off land.
or just plainday-to-dayliving. How many nooks and caves will you have to explore
Sheis generous,
genialandgor- before you find her? Career:
You are tempted to reveal
geousandblessedwith exquisite a few corporate secrets in order to solidify your positasteandstyle.Ofcourse,there tion. Loose lips sink ships, Lioness. Ready, aim, fire!
arethoseafflictedtypesthat
bucktheTaurean
trendand Virgo(Aug.24-Sept. 23)
spendtheirdaysdiningonfrozen
Sex:There is something about you that has tongues
fish sticks,cannedravioliand
wagging. Seductive May leads you into temptation.
Thunderbird,
buttheymayjust
Lucky girl. Career:Use your powers of persuasion to
bewaitingfor the rightdinner
get
what you want from the powers that be, so you
invitation.Generally,
thesegals
knowhowto livewell andonly can become the power behind the throne.
aspireto haveenoughmoneyto
supporttheirlavishlifestyles,
a randygirlfriendandstill
havea bit left in the
bankfor a rainyday.
Libra(Sept.24-0ct. 23)
Sex: May offers you a choice-continue
current
relationships or seek new ones. Who loves you,
baby? You will soon find out. Career:Business partners offer you a happy jolt. Let's hope it has to do
with increased revenues and not the electric bill.
Scorpio(Oct.24-Nov.22)
Sex: Your attention to exercise will produce some
20
Icurve
impressive results. Now impress her by pressing her.
Career:
You are especially productive this May. Is it all
a pretense to attract attention? Does it really matter?
Sagittarius
(Nov.23-Dec.22)
Sex:Get out and make the party rounds this May.
Romance is in the air. Do I smell something burningr
Oh, let's hope so. Career:Life takes a busy, stressful
turn and you are apt to overdo, whether at work or
play. I would suggest the latter, though.
Capricorn
(Dec.23-Jan.20)
Sex:There is no need to wander terribly far afield
to find the "who" and "what:' The question is "when''
and "where:' And the fun will be in the "how:' Career
There is the temptation to work from home this May.
Avoid the temptation unless you can at least pretend
to work.
Aquarius
(Jan.21-Feb.19)
Sex:Whisper sweet nothings in her ear and she will
follow you anywhere. Of course you may not want
her to do that. Sprinkle sugar in her bowl instead.
Career:
Your opinions are strong and compelling. But
yelling them will not bring the decision makers to
your side. Try subtle threats instead.
Pisces(Feb.20-March20)
Sex:Love for sale? Forget that. Go for the lavishly
expensive love that provides champagne baths and
truffles this May. Career:Use your power judiciously
to make a corporate move. When your power wanes,
try a cautious bribe or two.
Aries(March21-April20)
Sex: You are particularly sexy and alluring all
through May. Package it and sell as much of it as you
can before you go on a deeply discounted summer
sale. Career:Start new work projects immediately
before you lose interest. Lambda Rams have some
great ideas and now have the charisma to ignite
them. Kaboom!
AstrologerCharleneLichtensteinis the author ofHerscopes: A Guide to Astrology
for Lesbians. Get more at thestarryeye.
com or go to her blogat thestarryeye.typepad.com.
OPENSTUDIO
Clockwise from left: Pencil Reindeer, Red Dress;
Lipstick Blue Swirl; Glasses, Bic Pen
The Embodimentof Loss
A multimedia artist finds meaning in the mundane. By Anna Lonnberg
Mary-Cecile Gee began making fine artwork 20 years ago. She started out
with graphics and illustrations, but came into her own when she began creating three-dimensional art. She attended the Art Center in Los Angeles,
and there she discovered that her art was unconventional in that it was
an unusual marriage of concept and medium. She often broke free of the
school's traditional curriculum, which was focused around painting. She
experimented a lot, and at one point even made an ice sculpture in response
to an illustration assignment.
When her mother died, about 10 years ago, Gee's art shifted to focus on her mother's influence and how she finds her mother in the mundane articles she left behind:
lipstick, hair curlers-even cigarette butts. Though her mother is gone, Gee finds that
her personality is still present in these objects.
Gee's most recent body of work includes some of them. Entitled FieldEquations:An
(Accidental)Self-Portrait,it is made up of sculptures designed to hold the mold of her
mother's beauty products. The lipstick sculptures even have the imprint of her mother's
lips, which, according to Gee, give her mother a form of speech. She says the sculptures
are also influenced by Einstein's equations that describe the curvatures of space and time
produced by a gravitational field. Gee sees the equations as a metaphor for her show.
"That was a great metaphor for me because I was interested in the idea that one of
the ways that astronomers were looking for other planetary systems was to look out
into space, and they oftentimes could not see the star that was the center of the solar
system, but they could see a planet, or some bit of a planet, that was orbiting around
something and was being influenced gravitationally by something bigger than itself that
the astronomer couldn't see:•
This relationship was a perfect model for Gee to find her mother through her
mother's imprint on everyday objects. Her body-centric theme of loss will continue in
future projects, which could possibly include digital media.'i\s long as we're mortal, and
nobody's figured out how to get us out of that bind, bodies are really interesting
because, as expansive as our minds are, our brains are still organic and our brains are
still bodies, and they die;• says Gee. "These limitations of having a body are a fantastic
feature, so I think I'm still really interested in things that come out of the dialogue of
having a
ADVICE Lipstick & Dipstick
Putting It on Display
DearLipstickandDipstick:My girlfriendnever
treats me like I am her girlfriendin public.
Whenwe're out, she almostignoresme. She
is out of the closet,so that's not the issue.
Behindcloseddoors,she constantlytells me
howmuchI meanto her andthat she doesn't
knowwhat shewoulddo withoutme, but the
secondwe are aroundother people,I don't
exist.Sheignoresmeandoftenflirtswithother
women,andthat makesme angry.It's driving
meinsane.What'sthedeal?- Snubbed
in San
Francisco
Dipstick:Maybe she is one of those butches
who feels like she has to pretend she doesn't
need you in public.
Lipstick:Really? That actually happens?
Dipstick:It does, sadly, and let me be the first
to tell Snubbed's girl that she'll get further
if she's more gendewomanly. She obviously
hasn't been schooled properly and may need
me to come down there and teach her a
thing or two.
Lipstick:Don't buy your plane ticket, Dip, as
period.""There'sa Buffymarathonon."She's
confronted
meaboutit, butI'm notsurehowto
admitwhatI'mfeeling.She'stakennoticeof my
weightgain,andasfarasI know,she'sindifferent.
- NoBuff,NoMuff
Dipstick:Body issues. All women have them_
and they suck! Start working on yourself
and you'll start to feel a little better. A while
ago I read that Hillary Clinton made time
to work out every day. I figure if a woman
as busy as our Secretary of State can find
time to do it, so can I. It doesn't have to be
a big three-hour gym circuit class. Just get
out for a brisk walk, a bike ride, a half-hour
on the treadmill. The next thing you need
to do is put those feelings aside and just
have sex. When your girl comes on to you,
Dear Lipstickand Dipstick:My girlfriendis even if you're not in the mood, say yes. See
the most amazing,intuitivewomanI've ever what happens. Most likely when she starts
encountered.
However,recent circumstancesto touch you here and there, you'll suddenly
posea threatto ourrelationship.
Whenwe met, get in the mood. And what's going to make
I wasa workout-aholic,
vegetarian
healthfreak you feel better about your body than an
whofit nicelyintomygirlfriend's
arms.Sexwas orgasm or two? Try it.
wonderfuland I was her girl-toy.But several
monthsawayat collegecatalyzeda significant Lipstick:If you don't face this-and
fastweightgainandnowI'm repulsed
by mybody. you'll lose you girlfriend, No Muff. I'm not
I frequently
declinesex."I'm tired.""I'm onmy talking about hitting the gym or joining
I suspect what's going on here may be something else. Ready, Snubbed? She's just not
that into you (if only I'd written a book with
the same name). Now hold on, before you
grab your crying rag, hear me out. There's
also a chance she's one of those people who
is uncomfortable with public displays of
affection, although I hardly think looking
at your girlfriend when she's speaking is a
PDA. Either way, confront her and if she
doesn't shape up, it's time to reconsider this
relationship. My crystal ball isn't looking
hopeful about your current gal-but be encouraged, it also sees someone in your future
who will not onlx give you gobs of attention,
but also kisses on the train.
some overpriced weight-loss program. I'm
talking about restoring your self-esteem.
A fuller figure is nothing to be ashamed
of and your girlfriend, no doubt, loves you
unconditionally. Well, almost. I suspect
there is one condition: You must let her
inside. (I was speaking emotionally and
psychologically, but now I'm thinking physically,too.) You've got a double whammy here,
as the top two reasons that couples break up
are first, massive breakdowns in communication, and second, no more nookie. Trust
your girlfriend and love her enough to let
her in. Also, check out Paul Campos' book
The Diet Myth: Why America'.s Obsession
with Weight Is Hazardous to Your Health. It -
will help you start changing the way you love
yourself and see your body.
:J
--'
--'
DearLipstickand Dipstick:I feel lonelyin my
relationship.
I'm a 22-year-oldfemmewith a
I
26-year-oldbutchpartner.We got marriedin a.
22 I curve
Just Between Girlz~
"My girlfriend never treats me like I am her
girlfriend in public. When we're out, she
almost ignores me. Behind closed doors,
she constantly tells me how much I mean
to her, but the second we are around other
people, I don't exist. What's the deal?"
Californiain July. We're fightinga lot lately Dipstick:Maybe so, but what I want to know
and are not havingsex. She says she's just is what gives with the guilt about looking
not up for it. I don'tknowif we aren't having at naked women? There's nothing wrong
sex becausewe're fightingor if we're fighting with porn, for you, your lover, your mother
becausewe aren't havingsex. In the begin- or anyone else. As long as it doesn't become
ning,we had sex and it was earth-shattering. addictive, watching porn, reading erotica and
Recently,I've startedlookingat lesbianporn.I viewing X,rated movies can all be part of a
usuallyhateporn.My ex usedto lookat it and healthy sex life. Too often we depend on our
it hurtme deeply.I'd be reallyupsetif I found partners to be our best friend, our confidante,
out my currentgirlfriendwas lookingat porn, a sexy lover, personal chef and co,parent to
too.AfterwatchingpornI feel guiltyandmore our children. No one person can meet all
lonelyanddepressed
thanbefore.Pleasehelp. your needs all the time. When your lover isn't
up for cooking, you order out. When she's
- Miserablein MapleGrove
not up for sex, watch porn and masturbate.
Hell, watch with your partner, too. And when
Lipstick:I wonder if this 1s No Muff's
you're
through, tie her hands to the bedpost
girlfriend?
with a silk scar£ sit on her knees and talk
until she hears your concerns.
"
Lipstick:Did you ever see that fight scene
in Mr. and Mrs. Smith when Brangelina are
trying to kill each other and suddenly sex
MYDREAM
COUPLE
breaks out? Sounds like you guys need to
TinaFeyand H DaraTorres
trash the house, just like they did. One ques,
AmyPoehler • andHillaryClinton
tion: Why won't she have sex with you? You
didn't say. Maybe she's being lazy or letting
BESTNICKNAME
I EVERHAD
work get in the way. Or perhaps it's some,
Vagina Girlboy/Boygirl
thing more serious, like dealing with sexual
abuse issues. Find yourself a good therapist
URBAN
LEGEND
I WISHWERE
TRUE
and dig into what's keeping you at each oth,
Youcancookan H JamieLeeCurtis
er's throats (you should be there with your
eggbetweentwo
is intersex
tongue, not a razor blade). While you're at
cell phones
it, see the counselor on your own to get over
IFI WEREN'T
ANADVICE
COLUMNIST, your issues around porn, as they're adversely
I WOULD
BE
affecting your sexual health, too. Shame is
an awful aphrodisiac.
!dip~c
H
LawyerH Bicyclemessenger
FAVORITE
SEXALBUM
So Tonightthat 8 Maxwell'sUrban
I MightSee,
HangSuite,
MazzyStar
Maxwell
Is your girlfriend a slob? Want to get back
into the dating scene?
Watch new episodes of
The Lipstick & Dipstick
Show at curvemag.com.
TRY FOR FREE!
1.800.616.6113
CODE 1508
lavender line™
North America's Lesbian Chatline
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ADVICE Relationships
Avoidin the CloseShave
Five ways to keep your beard marriage from getting too hairy. By Kate Lacey
is nothing more American
than settling down in order
to avoid conflict, and therefore the beard marriage is
arguably the most patriotic
union ever conceived. Gay
men and lesbians are pairing up like dynamic duos,
tying the knot in order to
create the impression that
they embrace the heterosexual norm. Of course,
the result is a brilliant ruse.
Who could have guessed
that Rock Hudson, Rosie
O'Donnell
or Liberace
were really queer? Here are
some tips to help in making your beard marriage
successful.
We now live in a brave new world where
an African American man is our president,
where gay men and women are excelling
in the worlds of reality and talk show TV,
where hit songs on the radio abound with
same-sex trysts and where homosexuals are
out there fighting for the right to split their
worldly possessions 50/50 in divorce court.
But, shockingly, some folks with homosexual
tendencies still have to play hide-and-seek at
the playground. We still can't ask or tell in
the military. Certain religious factions still
openly compare lesbians to lepers. There are
companies, school boards, families and other
collective social units that still decree gayness
to be a blight on humanity. These pressures
weigh heavily on some of our team members.
(Or maybe they just want the great tax break
that Prop. 8 denies us.)
So, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. There
24
Icurve
switching out the transmission while hubby
is gallivanting around the kitchen wearing a
lacy apron. There can be no arguing about
who will wear the tux or who will lead your
first dance as a married couple. That's the
sacrifice of the beard marriage. He will have
to get his hands dirty and give up those long
workouts in the gym with the boys. She will
have to learn how to walk in heels without
tottering like Amy Winehouse on a one-day
pass. Hubby will wear the pants, but not the
hot pants. Wifey will wear the apron and
not the one that says Dykes Grill, Gay Men
Order In.
Youdonothaveto havesexif youarein a beard
marriage-I'msurethatis a reliefto bothparties.However, in order to fulfill the illusion,
a master bedroom should be invented that
reflects both of your tastes. Her NASCAR
collection and his Marky Mark Calvin Klein
Thelesbianshouldnotreally underwear framed print should both find
weara beard.That will be a space to share. However, when company
dead giveaway. It is OK for arrives, be sure to drool over the appropriate
the male to have a beard, item. But avoid the Key West decor in the
although, to throw off suspi- guest bedroom and the tribute to Xena in
cion, it should be a Grizzly the master bedroom. Everyone will be onto
Adams, Unibomber-esque
your true identities faster than Clark Kent
scraggly beard. No self-respecting gay man changing in a phone booth.
would be caught dead with such unruly facial
hair, although many self-respecting lesbians Ofcourse,youwill needto be socialwith your
might.
ownkind,butdiscretion
mustbe used.Going
to the Womyn's Music festival, Dinah Shore
Do not advertiseon Internetdatingsitesthat weekend or any kind of cruise may be a little
youandyourmanare lookingfor like-minded too out there. To fill your social needs, wifey
fakersfor a spiritedand exfoliatedsex romp. can join a softball team while hubby takes a
You are especially discouraged from posting flower-arranging course. But avoid any kind
a copy of your wedding photo, as your sis- of touching with anyone of the same gender
ter could stumble across this when looking while in public. Pass on the handshake at
for husband number four. (You know how church. Nix the slap on the butt after a home
sacred our hetero counterparts hold matri- run. Turn down the lap dance at the weekly
mony to be.) Your cover will be blown for sure. pot luck. Someone could get the wrong idea.
To one extent or another, we all play a
Be sure to properlyfall into your socially part that may not be entirely authentic,
acceptablegenderroles.The heteros have whether we sport the proverbial goatee, a
been acculturated to behave in certain ways full beard or a simple five o'clock shadow.
that you and your beard will need to adopt to Whatever the reason, a Gillette is a terrible
continue to fool everyone. Wifey cannot be thing to waste.
10 Thin s FemmesWishYou Knew
It's not a weapon ....it's just lipstick. By Robin Miner-Swartz
We femmes can feel unappreciated or misunderstood by our
sisters. Some butches don't know
what the hell to make of us. Is our
nail polish really that scary? Most
of us don't have weapons in our
Coach purses-just
several
lipsticks and a nail file. So,
here are 10 things we femmes
wish you knew about us. And
to help us out with the list,
we turned to two of the funniest femmes we know-comics
Suzanne
Westenhoefer (top) and Vickie Shaw.
the neighborhood chicken-wing joint with a
big bunch oflady-loving ladies. "I think there
is still an underlying suspicion-'She's
not
really one of us. She'll hurt me and leave me
for a man;" Westenhoefer says. Don't be so
quick to think we'll turn on you and we won't
be so quick to judge your hair.
Weare bottoms.
Period.
''And, whatever you're
doing in bed, do more;' Shaw says.
If we'rebossy,it's because
we knowyoudon't
thinkwe're lesbiansat all. ''At a bar, femmes
are all like, 'Would somebody please recognize that I'm a lesbian?' That's, I think, what
We mightbe sittingbesideyouwatchingthat makes femmes so aggressive;' Westenhoefer
NFLplayoffgame,but we're not payingatten- says. "I think that's why femmes get like, 'You,
me, dance floor, let's go, baby:" Then we hope
tion."In our minds, we are doing something
completely different;' Westenhoefer says. you overpower us later.
"But we are watching you out of the corner of
our eye so we can jump up and scream when We want you to think we're pretty.''Always,
you do:' We will, however, happily deck our- without fail, tell us how stunning we are;'
selves out in whatever team colors you like Shaw says. And remember: Lipstick is not
(especially if beads and leis are involved) and the enemy. Please don't hate us if we try to
get you to cut your mullet. Or buy clothes in
go get you another beer.
the women's department. We're not trying to
"Takecareofthecarandpayallthebills,geez."
Or, to put a finer point on Shaw's words, we
really do like to be taken care 0£ It makes us
feel special. And we will take care of you by
looking totally fabulous-about
90 percent
of the time. We all get Sunday mornings off.
Wehaveonedog(andno cats},because
we're
morelikegaymen,Westenhoefer says.Also, our
dogs tend to be on the smaller side. Because if
we had a big Rottweiler-Shepherd mix, we'd
have to go running with it or do something
else that might make us break a sweat.
We'realwaysright.Please just know this and
embrace it. Shaw would like you to learn to
say, without hesitation, "Yes, honey:'
We reallyare part of the club.Even though
we do quite well sipping cosmopolitans at
cocktail parties with gay boys (pinkies up!),
we love nothing more than kicking back at
change you-really. OK, maybe a little, but
not to the point of discomfort. You don't have
to wear cute shoes.
Wemaybe comfortable
in cargoshorts,a tank
top,a baseball
capandKeens,
but"girly"outfits
arereallymorein ourcomfortzone.We might
not wear dresses, nylons and heels all that
often, but we will wear pink-and jewelryand get pedicures regularly.
Focuson us,please."No matter what we let
you think, it's all about us;' Shaw says. We
want to be the center of attention and we
want to be adored. Yes, it's shallow, but we can
be deep, too. You would know this if you'd
only give us more than a glance.
"You meet so many girls who are big
giant butches and don't want to be called
that;' Westenhoefer says. "It's like, accept
your stereotypes. Is labeling really so wrong?
I'm completely fine about being a big, giant
femme:'
Amen, sister. Wanna borrow my Clinique
Long Last Soft Matte Lipstick? I have it in
five colors ...
ADVICE Health
LesbianTeensat
HigherRiskfor Pregnancy
A recent study published by the Canadian Journal
of Human Sexuality found that lesbian, gay and
bisexual youth had higher rates of pregnancy than
their straight peers. The study, led by University
of British Columbia professor Elizabeth Saewyc,
examines the self-reported data of teens surveyed in 1992, 1998 and 2003. Over the 11-year
period, overall rates of teen pregnancy went
down, but sexually active LGB youth consistently
reported disproportionately higher rates.
The youth polled were also asked about their
age when their first sexual activity occurred, their
total number of partners, substance abuse before
sex, condom use and sexual abuse history. In
many areas, LGB youth engaged in more risky
sexual behavior than their peers. For example,
sexually active self-identified lesbian teens
reported their first sexual activity occurred prior
to age 14 at a rate of 48 percent in 2003-down
from their 1998 rate of 68 percent but higher than
that of their bisexual (26 percent) or straight (13
percent) peers.
When asked what factor contributes most to
these results, Saewyc expressed the need for
further research and policy development, as both
Canada and the United States have "unacceptable levels of sexual abuse. We need to pay more
attention."
The research on risky sexual behavior in teens
remains sparse. In broad terms, Saewyc
states that schools and communities can
help "teach kids what healthy relationships look like," regardless of their
orientation. She heavily emphasizes
the need for substantive sex education and urges parental involvement. "They can advocate with the
school for allowing supportive policies, like gay-straight alliances."
And what becomes of the pregnant Lesbian and bisexual teens in
those statistics? Another knowledge gap: Pregnancy makes
them "less visible." They go
from being LGB teens to
pregnant teens. "What
does that do in terms of
our care of them and
their children?" asks
Saewyc. [Andrea
Millar]
THE RUMBLE DOWN UNDER
If you'veeverdreamed
of holdingupa ?-Eleven
andgoingdownontheclerk,the
Smodnoc
is the perfectpleasure
weaponfor you.Basically
a sexmaskthatturns
yourtongueintoa latexpuppet,the Smodnoc
is the latestin safe-sexinnovation.
Ofcourse,it lookscompletely
ridiculous,
buta littlehumiliation
is a smallpriceto
payfor protecting
yourhealth.HowdoestheSmodnoc
compare
to the classic
dentaldam?[HeatherRobinson]
SM0DN0C
(grapeflavored
by LineOne
Laboratories)
Cost:
20 unitsfor $40
About$1.50a dam
Sexiness
of name:
"Smodnoc"
maymean"hotoral
pleasure"in Ork,butin Englishit
just soundslikethe nameof a bad
thrasherband.
I'mnotsurewhat'smoresexy,
thinkingof yourdentistor thinkingof yourvaginaasa potentia
floodthatneedsto bedammed
Ease
of use:
TheSmodnoc
is easyto use.Gettingthegirlto stoplaughingmight
bemoreof a challenge.
It's easyto use,butit's not
alwayseasyto usewell.
Perks:
Thetexturedsurfaceaddssome
extra"ahhh"to the receiver's
experience.
Because
it strapsto
theface,it leavesyourhandsfree
for otherendeavors.
Improved
communication
skills.
Because
you'llhavenoidea
whereherclit is,youwill be
forcedto talk aboutit.
Bummers: Thetonguepockettendsto fill up
withsalivaanddrowningin one's
ownspitis notparticularly
sexy.
Themaskalsomakesit difficultto
speak,sogetyoursweetnothings
in beforeyougetit on.
In myopinion,usinga dental
dam,evena goodone,is like
tryingto paintthe MonaLisa
througha garbagebag.
DO YOU PRACTICE SAFE SEX WITH WOMEN?
Sometimes,
depending
on
the sexact
(Dentaldams?
Toomuchtrouble)
Sometimes
depending
on my
partner
According
to a curvemag.com
poll
ITRIED
IT
Womb Withouta View
Looking for some alone time? Try a sensory deprivation tank. By Gillian Kendall
It was a typical weekend evening, and
my partner and I were companionably
complaining about bills: the mortgage,
the damn insurance on everything, the
vet expenses for our four aging animals. I
told her, "I get tired of being a grownup:'
Sometimes I want to be a kid again, with
someone else to not only pay the rent but
also clothe and feed me, take me out for fun
and then, when I've had enough, take me
home and put me to bed. I want to sleep in
a place both warm and dark, preferably a
waterbed heated to body temperature-as
womblike as possible.
I get that womb-y escape from isolation tanks.
Also called float tanks and sensory depravation
tanks, they are large, waterproof, soundproof boxes
in which the user floats on a bed of water thick with
Epsom salts, basking in dark, warm, private silence. I
first floated when I lived in downtown San Diego, a
city so sunny and lively that it frayed my nerves. For
relaxation, and out of curiosity, I took the plunge
into isolation.
It's a little like death. After I had a calming drink
of herbal tea in the anteroom, a soft-spoken receptionist led me to the changing room to get ready for
my soak. There I stood alone in a large, dark bathroom with piped-in, ultra-soft New Age music, getting ready to face infinity-for an hour, at least.
I shed my clothes, put in earplugs and
applied Vaseline to any little cuts or scrapes on my
body, so the salt wouldn't sting and interfere with my
bliss. Then I opened the lid of a coffinlike box and
peered inside. Strewn with Epsom salts, the water
smelled like the ocean and looked like molten glass.
Stepping in, I felt nothing at all-the water was
exactly my body temperature-and
once I leaned
back, floating was inevitable. Well supported, I sank
only slightly, my knees and breasts staying above
the surface. With my face well above the waterline,
I breathed in the steamy, salty air with gratitude. I
couldn't go under if I tried, and no one was going to
bother me for a long time.
I took several minutes to close the top of the box, because I knew that once the lid came down, it was going
to be utterly dark and a little weird. (Claustrophobes,
take note: There's no lock on the lid and you can open
it with a touch at any time.) But once I shut out the
light, I wasn't afraid of the dark so much as fascinated
by the noise and color inside my own mind.
What came to me was a slow, gradual peace, like
going into a dreamless sleep. The day's worries and
my recent emotional upheavals melted away, leaving
me feeling safe and protected. In my timeout from
life, I was free to think things through, to meditate or
pray or do nothing at all.
Also, I saw a light-not enough to interfere with
my relaxation, but a sure, small beam of white, like a
star, coming from the far end of the tank. I thought
there must be a pinprick opening in the seal of
the lid.
Later on, when soft music wafted into the tank
to suggest that my soak was over, I dressed and was
reborn to the world of light and sound. As I drank
a second cup of chamomile, I told the receptionist
about the light leak.
"Oh, really?" he said. "I doubt it, but I'm always
looking for an excuse to soak. I'll go check it our:'
Ten minutes later he came back grinning, drying his
hair. "There's no leak;' he said. "We get sent in there all
the time to look for lights-red, gold, white-people
see all kinds of things. Whatever you saw, it wasn't
coming from outside:'
There I stood
alone in a large,
dark bathroom
with piped-in,
ultra-soft New
Age music,
getting ready to
face infinityfor an hour,
at least.
May 2009 j 27
ADVICE Money
Can YourPooch Make You Rich?
Some lesbians find financial independence with doggie day care. By Sassafras Lowrey
Though the gayby boom is in full force, many
lesbians still prefer canine dependents. Gone
are our grandmother's days, when dogs fended for themselves and ate whatever scraps
were put in their dish. Today's dogs enjoy
organic food, holistic veterinary treatments
and, of course, playtime at day care, which is
a boon for businesses that cater to themand their moms. Enter Camp Bow Wow:
one of the premier doggie day care facilities
and an international franchise with over 90
day care centers in operation and another
115 in development in both the U.S. and
Canada. And the best part? Camp Bow Wow
is incredibly LGBT-friendly. Founder Heidi
Flammang told The Advocate in 2007 that
about 25 percent of the franchise's owners
were lesbian or gay, and some say the current estimate is closer to 40 percent.
Randy Defazio and Sherri Hayes are
part of that lesbian franchise boom. The
couple own and operate two Camp Bow
Wow facilities, one each in Bridgewater and
Lawrenceville, N.J. For them, it was most
important to buy into a business that was accepting of their family.
"The Camp Bow Wow franchise is very
gay-friendly. In fact, we could not ask for a
2s
Icurve
more inclusive environment. Quite honestly,
we did not experience any concerns, even
in the beginning. One of the things that we
have loved about this environment from
the start is that Sherri and I can be who we
are;' says Defazio. Their account is echoed
by CeCe Campbell, who has owned her
Northglenn, Colo., franchise with her partner since 2004.
The premise behind Camp Bow Wow is
that it's a place "where a dog can be a dog:'
This means that while moms are busy at
work, Rover gets to spend the day with a
whole cast of canine buddies, playing, napping, snacking and generally living it up
in doggie paradise, all under the watchful
supervision of trained camp counselors. "We
divide the dogs up in groups based on factors such as size, playfulness and age, so they
are with dogs that are similar to themselves;'
Hayes explains.
The couple goes on to discuss how Camp
Bow Wow is also an option for parents who
travel. Pooches spending the night participate in day care activities, and then at night
they get to bed down in their own private
cabins. "The dogs enjoy their play groups all
day long but take breaks to eat, sleep and rest
in their cabins;' says Hayes. "A.ftereach meal,
the dogs rest for an hour or so, to digest.
Then, at night, they go into their cabins as
very contented and tired pups:'
The women were all drawn to Camp Bow
Wow for different reasons. For Campbell
it was out of a need for a facility she could
trust. "We love to travel and found it difficult
locating an acceptable place for our two fourlegged kids to stay. So, in trying to solve that
problem we came across Camp Bow Wow
and doggie day care as a concept:'
Defazio and Hayes were looking for a
change, and came to doggie day care to move
away from corporate America. "We were
very much ready for a change, so we had
been looking at several potential business
opportunities;' recalls Defazio. 'i\t the same
time, as dog owners, we saw a big void in the
services provided in the industry:'
Now the two spend their days with a whole
pack of canine kids. "We don't look at this
as just taking care of dogs. We view this as
establishing and maintaining relationships
with both the dogs and their people;' she
explains. "We see some of these dogs and their
people several times a week, or even every day,
so we really get to know them well. We have
developed some very strong bonds:'
While Campbell's facility outside Denver
doesn't have quite as many lesbian clients as
she'd like, Defazio and Hayes have a strong
following in the community. "Many lesbians
have dogs and they want the best for them,
which we think Camp Bow Wow is;' says
Hayes. "We also think that many lesbians
are happy to support lesbian- and gay-owned
businesses:'
Are you thinkingof buying
a franchise?Lookingfor a
lesbian-friendlycompany?
Check out cool franchises
(like Wild Birds Unlimited,
right)and interviewswith lesbian
businessowners in an upcoming
issue and at www.curvemag.com.
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petparents.com
A09102
DYKE
DRAMA
A Woman of Influence
How to spot the pretenders in our midst. By Michele Fisher
I am a bad influence. When I was a kid, my
mom would automatically assume I was
involved in every bit of mischief that occurred
in our neighborhood. I often overheard her
on the telephone with other parents offering
me up as the culprit of a caper without even
bothering to hear my side of the story. I was
prone to fibbing, but at least she could have
asked. She and the other mothers on the
block would act as if their own children were
guileless innocents with no free will of their
own. They were but robots and I was at the
controls, laughing maniacally as I sent them
on their sinister missions. Funny, all of that
power and my family remained lower middle
class. I suppose I could have set up a pick,
pocket ring or a drug cartel, but I hadn't yet
learned how to put my influential personality
to good use.
Until I became a lesbian.
I mean, I was always gay, but once I told
everybody, it not only defined who I was,
but seemed to render some other women
incapable of making their own choices. "You
made me gay!" they would inevitably shriek
in horror one day, after the sex had become
tiresome or their boyfriends became suspi,
cious or I had asked for a commitment.
I had the power to make women into homo,
sexuals, or so it seemed. As superpowers go,
being able to turn people gay would appear
to be a pretty great one. But it didn't work on
everybody and it never seemed to last long.
What good was a superpower if it didn't
work on the people you wanted it to work
on, and it wore off just when you started
enjoying yourself?
One night, I drove 400 miles just to see a
woman who swore she couldn't live without
me, only to find her drunk in a corner mak,
ing out with some gappy,mouthed hockey
player. When I intervened, she gave me a
smile that was as heartless as her boyfriend's
was toothless.
Another woman's spell wore off just as
I was standing in her parents' living room
while she got ready to go out with me. She
announced to her parents, her numerous
30 I curve
siblings, the cat and me that she was not a
homosexual and she did not appreciate me
trying to turn her into one. Her father was
much swifter than I expected him to be.
Luckily, I had more stamina. If her dad had
known that his daughter required about 50
sexual encounters to (ahem) come to her
decision, I am quite sure he could have
squeezed out another couple of blocks.
Yes, the ability to turn bets into temporary
homos has been more of a curse than a bless,
ing. But at least I wasn't alone. Other fags
and dykes seemed to have the same godlike
power over other peoples' sexuality, too. We
would share our tales of woe over glasses of
cheap wine and bottomless cups of weak coffee at the gay cafe, where we were just as likely
as not to run into our on,again, off,again
homosexual suitors. Gradually, we began to
see patterns emerge, and eventually I became
able to predict with great success which girls
were going to become only temporarily gay.
But figuring out how my superpower
worked did not always keep me out of harm's
way. Sometimes a girl would just be too
pretty for me to care what the future helduntil something bad happened, and then I
would realize again that it's just not worth it.
You would think that letting her make the
first move would prevent this type of disaster. After all, if the physical connection is her
idea, then there is no way for her to blame
it on you later. Ha! Remember, they have no
free will. You, the gay, are in total control of
her actions, as well as your own. You made
her make the first move.
Surely after a certain period of time passes
and she is still sleeping with you, she will
realize that she is indeed gay. Don't bet on
it. There was this old law enforcement myth
that cops are not allowed to lie about being
cops. You used to see it on TV all the time.
Hookers and drug dealers asking potential
customers if they were cops because somehow police officers were compelled to admit
their occupational identities, if questioned
about them directly. It took criminals a
long time to realize that undercover officers
blow their cover only after they bust you.
Although cops can't be deterred by direct
questions about their identities, pseudodykes often can.
You want to avoid being cast as the villain
in Who Made Jenny a Muff Diver?Just ask
Jenny from the start if she is gay. My mistake
was assuming that just because a girl kissed
me in all the appropriate places, she was gay.
But there is more to being a lesbian than having sex with a woman. Being a dyke means
taking responsibility for your actions.
In this case, words speak louder than
actions. When she comes up for air, ask her
if she considers herself to be a homosexual.
Saying yes, claiming to be bi or saying she
isn't sure are all perfectly acceptable answers,
but if she gets mad and doesn't answer you
or ignores the question completely, I say drop
her like she's not hot.
Closet cases don't bother me nearly as
much as head cases. I can keep your secret
if I have to, but if you can't even tell yourself that you are queer, then what's the point?
You can't have sex with women when it suits
you and then go back to your straight world
when lesbian life becomes too real.
If you think that these women are perfect
for the dyke on the go who just wants a quick
roll, think again. These faux-lesbian types
suck the life out of you better than they suck
anything else.
They can't say they like girls, but they
always want to talk you to death about everything else before they sleep with you, which
is all the more reason not to get involved with
one of these Voldemort types. (You know,
the evil so evil that you dare not speak its
name.) If she can't say"gay" then don't be gay
with her.
And should some self-loather "drama out"
on you someday and accuse you of turning
her into a lesbian, you just tell her not to worry because homosexuality is temporary-it
only lasts one lifetime. Then tell her you are
leaving because she is a bad influence.
May 2009
I31
POLITICS
Hearin the Lesbian Voice
One of our longest running columnists looks back. By Victoria A. Brownworth
People often ask me why, since I have had
a job writing for the mainstream press for
years, I also still write for the queer press. I
am also frequently asked why we need a queer
press at all. These questions make me a little
impatient and a little sad.
I write for the queer press because I'm a
lesbian. I want to write for my own
community, not just the straight
community. I want to write about
issues that directly impact my
people.
As for why we need a queer
press, the answer is because we
for the Advocate. But I felt excluded from my
own life as a lesbian because all the stories I
wrote were either for a straight audience or
for a gay male audience. The same impetus
that made publisher Frances Stevens found
this magazine made me want to write for it.
Where was the lesbian voicer
A decade before I began writing here, I edited an
insert for PGN, my
the women of The L Word the way straight
women do over the men of Greys Anatomy?
Of course.
It's about balance.
A lesbian writer I have known for decades
often complains that there's not enough good
lesbian writing out there, that there's too much
fluff. I agree. But there's also not enough good
writing, period. It's not endemic to lesbianism.
And part of true equality, I think, is being able
When I was a young lesbian there was
no lesbian press ...where lesbians could
hear the panoply and diversity of their
own voices. Curve gave us that.
stonewall 25
Even after 19 years we still need a lesbian press.
need to make our voices heard. We need a
queer press because we are not yet full citizens
of this or any other country, and mainstream
culture is as uninterested in our lives as it is
in our civil rights. If we want our stories told,
we need writers like me, writers who have a
personal investment in telling those stories.
When I began writing this column, 19
years ago (when it still went by the name
Deneuve), it was because I wanted to write
for and about lesbians. At that time, I was a
reporter for one of the largest daily newspapers in the country and also wrote regularly
32
Icurve
local Philadelphia gay
newspaper, and called
it "The Lesbian Voice:'
It focused on lesbian
issues, news and culture. But the endeavor was short-lived
and I was soon back
on the gay male beat
at that paper.
So when this magazine approached me,
my own lesbian voice had been pent up for a
long time. It was very freeing to have a space to
write to and about lesbians. I no longer had to
subsume my own lesbianism in my writing.
Over the years of writing for this magazine
I have never wavered in my desire to address
the community of women eager for news
about the lesbian world. Just because Ellen is
on TV every afternoon doesn't mean we have
been mainstreamed.
This publication, like any other glossy,
monthly "lifestyle" magazine, has addressed a
range of issues, trends and gossip over the years.
A lot of serious stuff comes out of the magazine, and there's also a lot of entertaining fluff.
But it's all queer. And sometimes you need
fluff just as much as you need serious writing. Shouldn't we be able to crush out on
to have it all-the guilty-pleasure fluff as well
as the prize-winningjournalism and literature.
Over my years here I have almost
always written about the serious issues: dykes
on death row, rape, domestic violence, cancer, child custody. Politics and more politics.
Occasionally I have written the fluff-interviews and entertainment pieces. I have loved
doing it all.
Not only has it been a very powerful
experience for me to talk directly to a queer
audience, but I have, on occasion, actually
gotten to see how much it has meant to my
readers.
A few years ago, a lover of mine died of
cervical cancer. I promised her when I visited
her in hospice that I would write her story.
I wrote about her unnecessary, untimely
and very lesbian death-she'd had no health
insurance, no regular doctor, and, as a butch
lesbian, had felt uncomfortable going to the
gynecologist.
After the story was published, we got a
series of letters from women who had read
the piece, gone and gotten tested and found
they had cancer. These women wanted to say
how the story saved their lives.
This is why we need a queer press and
<(
why we need independent publications. Over 0
Shaking Things up in Bogota
nearly two decades, we have established a
relationship with our readers. We are speak~
ing directly to lesbian, bisexual and transgen~
der women about the things that matter in
their lives. We are reaching out not just to
the Castro district in San Francisco and the
Village in New York City, but to all the places
where lesbians live and work and maybe aren't
able to come out to their families and friends,
but can read about being lesbian and imag~
ine that one day they will be able to be out
safely in their own town. Or maybe they'll be
encouraged to move to Chicago or Altanta or
West Hollywood and come out there.
When I was a young lesbian there was no
lesbian press. There was a burgeoning gay
male press and a feminist press, but nowhere
for lesbians to hear the panoply and diversity
of their own voices. Curve gave us that.
No doubt there are those who think of it
as just another"women's" magazine, no differ~
ent from Cosmo, Glamour or Elle. Certainly
there are aspects of those magazines in
ours. But it still all comes back to one thing:
queer. The voices in this magazine are queer.
The writers and editors are queer. The sub~
ject of our discourse here-whether
were
writing about music or art, books or TV,
politics or sex-is queer.
When you pick up this magazine, wheth~
er it's at the Starbucks off Castro Street, at
your local queer bookstore or at the end of
the dirt road where it just arrived in your
mailbox, when you open it up what you see
are women, women, women. Lesbians mostly,
but also bisexual and transgender women.
But it's all about us, our queer female voices
and what we have to say-whether
we are
young or old, fat or thin, white or of color, tat~
ted up and pierced or seemingly conservative,
athletic or disabled, rich or poor.
Why do we need queer writers and a queer
press:' Because we have things to say and
issues to address that the straight media
could not care less about, but that are
vital to our lives. Why do we need Curve:'
Because 19 years after one lesbian put up her
own money to print a much less glamorous
version of the magazine you are now reading,
our voices are still easily drowned out in the
straight world and the gay male world, and
we want our own, clearly heard voice. Curve
gives us that voice. And I, for one, after 19
years, am still grateful.
In any guidebook to Colombia you
come across today, there is inevitably a paragraph describing how
deeply entrenched machismo is
in this staunchly Roman Catholic
country. Although Colombia is
changing and, in fact, it has some of
the most progressive laws for samesex couples in the entire Western
Hemisphere, out lesbians and gay
men in the public eye are still few
and far between.
That's what makes Blanca
Duran, the 36-year-old mayor of the
Chapinero district of Bogota, a true
trailblazer. She's out, and Colombia
is proud.
"I thought it was important to talk
about being a lesbian so that others would see that you don't have
to hide in the closet in Colombia
anymore," Duran told reporters when
she was elected. "I hope that it will
make it easier for others to come out
and give greater visibility to the gay
community."
Politics didn't come naturally to
Duran, who is an industrial engineer
by training. After college, however,
as she slowly embarked on a path of
self-acceptance, she also began to
gravitate toward activism. She became a member of a left-leaning party, the Polo Democratico, where she
was one of the founders of the Polo
de Rosa, the Party's LGBT interest
group. Under her leadership the Polo
de Rosa frequently flexes its muscle:
Recently, they had a party senator
admonished for voting against the
rights of same-sex couples.
She was also an active board
member of the main LGBT rights
organization in the country,
Colombia Diversa. Thanks in great
part to its efforts, the movement has
seen some extraordinary successes.
After several attempts for recognition of couples' rights had failed
in the congress, Colombia Diversa
got Colombia's highest court to
grant civil union rights for same-sex
couples this past January.
Without a doubt, that decision
catapulted Colombia alongside
Uruguay and Canada into the spotlight as one of the most advanced
countries in the hemisphere in
terms of gay rights. It has made an
enormous impact on the community.
But similarly important for the movement is getting gays and lesbians
in the public arena to dar la cara, or
become visible. Enter Duran.
She begins her workday at 6
a.m. She is constantly meeting with
community groups and is obsessed
with convincing the police that,
yes, women are capable of being
tough on crime. Much of the job
can be routine, but it is promoting convivencia ("living together")
among Chapinero residents, gay and
straight, that means perhaps the
most to Duran, and will be at the top
of her agenda for the remainder of
her term. "I hope that we can get to
a point where getting along doesn't
mean we have to kick out those who
are different," she says. [Andrew
Dier]
May 2009
I33
L
ESBIAN POLITICOS, like Wisconsin's Tammy Baldwin and California's
Sheila Kuel, have been making waves for over two decades, defying
the odds and courageously paving the way for the next generation
of female politicians. From New York to Hawaii, these 10 fascinating women
get our vote every time.
NicoleLefavour
Idaho state Sen. Nicole
LeFavour's road to the statehouse has been a long one.
For 10 years before she was
elected, she worked as a volunteer for nonprofit organizations, and the
frustration of not being heard by her elected
officials spurred her into launching her own
career in government. "I talked to legislators
about human rights, tax policy, healthcare,
consumer protection and gay and lesbian
issues. Hard issues. I rarely saw anything I
worked for get printed by a committee, much
less passed into law. In my 30s, I spent a lot
of time angry with lawmakers who disagreed
with me on the issues that affected my life,"
she recounts. But she says she's also found allies in unexpected places-the year before she
ran for the legislature, one of the most antigay lawmakers in the statehouse became one
of her strongest allies on a healthcare bill she
was working to pass for the Idaho Community
Action Network. And since taking office she
has learned the importance of working with
her fellow lawmakers to get things done. "We
may debate heatedly on an issue one minute,
but the next minute on the floor we might
have to be allies on a different bill-one that
won't pass without us working together. We
humans are pretty multi-faceted. To make it
all work we have to remember what we agree
on and have in common:'
TinaWard-Pugh
"One of my primary passions for 20 years
has been affordable housing," says Louisville,
Kentucky's Ninth District Councilwoman
Tina Ward- Pugh, who holds a master's
degree in social work and worked as the
administrative director for the Coalition for
the Homeless for several years. Ward- Pugh
also played a strong role in the passage of a
fairness ordinance, ending discrimination
against gays and lesbians, only 26 days after
she was elected. She helped open the minds
of five Republicans who
opposed the ordinance by
participating in the discussion as an out lesbian, thus
putting a human face on
the issue. "It made it very
uncomfortable for those five Republicans.
When folks are educated, and have a face on
any issue, they become more comfortable with
it;' Ward- Pugh explains. "There is no question
but that as a state we have a long way to go.
But I see that as a challenge, that we just have
a little more work to do here:' She even sees
a lesbian president in our future. "I have every confidence that that will be the case," says
Ward- Pugh. "More and more, it's the people
who are 40 years and older that struggle with
retaining any sense of awkwardness about
gays and lesbians. Those 40 and under don't
understand what the big deal is. These people
are becoming our voters and civic leaders:'
SusanTalamantes
Eggman
Susan Talamantes Eggman
is already getting things
done during her first term
on the city council of
Stockton, Cali£, a city with
one of the highest crime rates in the state. "I
like to be able to connect with people," says
Eggman. "That's how I won office. I went
door to door and we had community rallies.
And, I would like to think, the same way I
ran my campaign I have served:' Eggman ran
in a conservative area, against a very conservative opponent who actually claimed to be
"God's candidate:' "She really shot herself in
the foot with that," says Eggman, who was
never in the closet. "First of all, I look like a
big ol' lesbian, and secondly, I think secrets
breed Achilles' heels. As an elected official,
my prime responsibility is to enable people to
grab on and make a difference themselves. If
we all join together, just think of the changes
we could bring. I'm the happiest of all when
people come up to me and let me know I
have touched their everyday lives:'
Christine
Kehoe
California state Sen. Christine Kehoe was
the first out politician elected in San Diego
County back in 1993 and is
now serving her second term.
She is an energy conservationist and environmentalist
and feels that Californians are
leaders in saving the planet.
"Californians really embrace change, and are
very adamant about pursuing environmental
protection. Fundamentally, they want clean
air and clean water," she says. Kehoe is passionate about the need to change the automo-
owerful
lesbian
By
Jennifer
Corday
oliticia ns
34 I curve
tive industry. When the federal government
failed to step up [when?], California was the
first state to lead several others in proposing
a state law that limits tailpipe emissions, a
smart way to force Detroit to start manufacturing more fuel-efficient vehicles."California
consumers rank as one of the fifth- or sixthlargest spenders on the planet, so we tend to
influence the world as a cultural leader. We embrace new products, whether it's Frisbees, or
wind sailboards or the new hydrogen highway. I think Californians believe we're free to
pursue our dreams, and I think that makes
us a leader:' Unfortunately, California did
not come through in defeating Proposition
8, but the senator is confident that the battle
is not over. "The fact that Prop. 8 passed is an
enormous disappointment to everyone who
believes in nondiscrimination, but I believe
that next time we do it we will prevail:'
RosieMendez
Forty-five-year-old
Rosie
Mendez is young at heart
(hence the active MySpace
page and stellar taste in
music).
A
Democrat,
Mendez won a tight race in 2005 for city
council in New York City's District 2, continuing a lifelong commitment to activism,
legal advocacy and government service. She
also serves on the board of the Washington,
D.C.-based Mautner Project, which provides support for lesbians with cancer as
well as for their families. Her activism has
also included work for the Puerto Rican
Legal Defense and Education Fund and the
National Gay and Lesbian Task Force. Born
in the Williamsburg section of Brooklyn,
Mendez lived in public housing and attended
New York City public schools. She has long
been a fighter for affordable housing and is
admired for her ability to adapt to changewhether she's wearing a business suit to
make a serious speech about affordable
housing, or riding a bicycle in shorts and a
baseball cap for a community fundraiser for
kids, Mendez always keeps it real, which has
made her very popular in New York City's
Lower East Side.
LupeValdez
Lupe Valdez has always had a good work
ethic. She earned a Bachelor of Arts degree
in business administration by working two
jobs while going to school full-time. After
graduating, Valdez served as a captain in the
U.S. Army, where she was
a tank commander, then
started her career in law
enforcement, earning an
M.A. in criminology and
criminal justice from the
University of Texas at Arlington. Lopez is
the highest ranking law enforcement officer
in Dallas county and Texas' only female sheriff. Today her 30 years of experience in law
enforcement makes her a force to be reckoned with in Dallas County.
KimCocoIwamoto
Having grown up attending schools in
Hawaii, State Board of Education member
Kim Iwamoto brings personal experience as
well as professional prowess to her goal of providing
every student with the
best educational opportunities possible. Born in
Hawaii after her ancestors migrated from Japan
to work in the fields, Iwamoto believes in
serving the greater good, and has pledged a
lifelong commitment to volunteerism and
community service. Iwamoto holds a B.A.
in creative writing from San Francisco State
University and a J.D. from the University of
New Mexico School of Law, is a member
of the Safe Schools Community Advisory
Committee for the Department of Education
and often speaks at high schools and colleges
on civil rights issues and the importance of
community service.
PatriciaTodd
Rep. Patricia Todd was
elected to the Alabama
Legislature in 2006, making her the state's first
openly gay elected public official. She has been a strong advocate
for policies relevant to social justice and is
presently the associate director of AIDS
Alabama in Birmingham. She feels strongly
about improving healthcare, fighting poverty
and creating public policy that influences
marginalized,
underserved
communities.
She lives with her partner in Birmingham,
Ala., and was the founder of the Alabama
chapter of Stonewall Democrats.
MaryWiseman
When Ohio Gov. Ted Strickland appointed
Mary Wiseman to take the judicial seat on
the County Court of Common Pleas in
Montgomery, fellow Democratic contender
James D. Piergies challenged the decision,
despite Wiseman's 19 years of litigation experience. Piergies said that
Wiseman should not hear
cases involving the state
amendment banning samesex marriage, or Dayton's
new human rights ordinance, because she is a lesbian. A governor's judicial appointments are
rarely challenged by members of their own
party, and Piergie was immediately attacked
for thinly veiled bigotry and raising the issue
of Wiseman's sexuality "in the hope that homophobia would rear its ugly head and propel [him] to elected office"by attorney Steven
Dank Sr. in the Dayton Daily News and the
Gay People'sChronicle.Piergie dropped out
of the race the next day. Wiseman is now the
first openly gay judge in the history of the
state of Ohio.
LoriSchreiber
Lori Schreiber called on
over 20 years of experience
in social services, activism
and community volunteering to beat out a 24-year
incumbent and get elected as Township
Commissioner of Abington, Penn. "We're in
charge of everything from code enforcement
to parks, libraries, fire departments, police
departments and more;' says Schreiber, who
has been working hard to revitalize the town
since her 2005 election. "We had 15 to 20
vacant stores, and I knew it was important
to make people realize that this part of the
town was vital and alive by bringing in new
stores, creating more foot traffic and having more activities:' Schreiber was also out
from the get-go. "I made the decision from
the very start. I was a little bit worried that
it would be a strike against me when I ran,
but ... it was less of an issue than I thought
it would be:'
Schreiber is passionate about doing more
work on issues that affect poverty and homelessness. "There are all kinds of initiatives
that we need to work harder on to help eliminate poverty, and POWER is an organization
I helped start for people with mental illness;'
she says. Shreiber also helped create the
Open Door Program, a counseling program
for LGBT teens where she also served as a
clinical counselor.
April 2009
I35
ndrogynous, sexy and sporting a striking set of baby blues, out lesbian
Daniela Sea joined Showtime's The L Word in season three as Moira and takes her final bow as
Max. Over the course of the series, Max faced discrimination in the workplace, got the heave~
ho from Ms. Jenny Schecter and grew a wicked soul patch. And aside from the character's
physical transition from female to male (pulled off by Sea's amazing talent) Max became the
resident IT expert, gave credence to Shane's assertion that sexuality is fluid by falling for Jodi's
male interpreter and was apparently the only character on the show who'd seen the end of
Single White Female (i.e., Adele). While it may be a wrap for The L Word, for Sea, an activist,
actor and musician, this is just the beginning. The wandering artist who's traveled across the
world has a screenplay in the works, taken a stab at the horror genre in Don't Look Up and is
back to her punk rock roots with a possible album in the mix. She opens up about her life, how
playing a trans man has changed her perspective on gender identity and the meaning behind
her tattoos.
HowdoyoufeelaboutTheL Wordcoming
to a close?
I can't say I'm sad because, for me, every year was a great surprise ... ! guess in the world of
being an artist it's just on a project~by~project basis, because it's not like a regular job where
you imagine ... you could be doing it forever, until you retire. Everybody knows there is a lin:ut
with TV shows, like, Showtime almost always does five years. So yeah, there wasn't really time
to be sad about it. I guess I felt sad saying goodbye to the crew and some of my friends there.
But then, I have this weird feeling that we will probably all see each other again, in some other
form, anyway.
Speaking
of a castreunion,
wouldyoubeupforan L Wordmovie?
Well, I don't know. I'd have to hear and see what it was about. I guess I would want to know
what the story was, but-quite possibly.
Wereyouhappywithhowthecharacter
of Maxwaswritten?
Being a political activist ... ! would feel upset sometimes if I felt like there was misrepresenta~
tion happening. I would be thinking, How is this going to affect the image of trans people in·
the media? But then there is another side of me that, as an actor, if I feel like I can relate to the
character, then I don't judge what's happening. The arc of the character in general, every year,
was giving me a different kind of angle and [was] almost like playing a different person. He
changed. He went through so many changes.
DidplayingMaxchange
thewayyouviewtransgender
people?
It hasn't changed the way I view transgender people because I just feel like the lines of gender are
way more blurry than the way [they are] generally accepted in the mainstream. That's how me
and my friends have always lived, so I don't feel like Max was [really different from] a lot of my
friends, you know, other than he decided to take a certain action with the hormones. But in gen~
eral, I didn't look at it like a science experiment. To me, he's just an interesting and cool person.
Whataboutyourowngenderidentity?
I played this character for four summers. That would be three-a little more than three
years-of my life in this consciousness of this person. And in any role that I've played in my
life-even if it was theatre or films or anything-I just like to try to inhabit the person, like it's
me, in a way, and pull out those sides of me. It's a fun game, in a way.
Anytime you get to know a character that you're playing or a person in life, it's going to change
you in some ways and make you question or change your own identity. I think I've grown a lot in
these last years, and definitely getting to know Max is going to be part of that growth.
WhateffectdoyouthinkMaxhashadonyouraudience's
opinion
oftranspeople?
I think mainstream America loves TV, so anything that is on TV all of a sudden becomes
May 2009
I37
rural situations and also collectively, and traveling and stuff
like that.
Andyou'rein a bandnow,right?Thorns
of Life?
Yeah, I am playing with some old friends of mine that I've
known since I was a teenager, and that's pretty fun.
Howdidthatallcometogether?
I was just in New York a couple months ago to do stuff for
the [presidential] campaign, and when my friend found out I
was in town, he said, "You want to play bass with usr It could
be fun:' So we just played some house shows and we really
dedicated it to being super independent, so it's not going to be
anything mainstream-we're not interested in trying to make
a career of it or anything. It's just about getting back and playing in a lot of scenes where we come from, which would be the
anarchist punk scenes of the U.S.
Doesthatmeantherewon'tbeanalbumora tour?
We'll probably make an album, but we're not going to [tour].
We just play house shows and all-ages punk clubs and stuff.
We're not trying to
I don't
like Max was [really different from] play at rock arenas or
anything like that. I
a lot of my friends other than he decided to
come from this punk
rock background, so
take a certain action with the hormones. But
it's just really nice to
I didn't look at it like a science experiment.
be with my friends and
playing
music for kids.
To me, he'sjust an interesting and cool person.
And have it not be
about money, or anything like that.
valid. I think (Max] brought to the mainstream this discusAre you planningto collaborate
with your girlfriend,Bitch
sion in a sympathetic way, instead of showing this monsteragain?
type character from Silence of the Lambs as a trans person. You She's been working with her band and she did the Ferron
know, just as a human-like
somebody in a human circumrecord-which
was really amazing-and
doing some solo
stance. I think it made it so that ... people who wouldn't norstuff. So nothing's in the works right now. But I am writing
mally sympathize would be able to feel friendly and identify
this screenplay and working on this film project right now
with this character.
with a writer, and we hope to be making it in the next year.
Sounds
likeyou'reveryfondof Max.
Canyoutellusanything
aboutthescreenplay?
Yeah, I love him. [Laughs] He is endearing for me, like a Not quite yet. I will say that it takes place in Los Angeles. [I can't
little brother.
say more] because we're still creating it-you know how that is.
Whatdoyouthinkyou'regoingto missmostabouttherole?
I could tell you something and it could be completely different
I like that question. I think it's like missing a friend-it's hard
(in the end]. But I think we've got something solid now.
to think of one thing. Max changed so much and grew up so Wecouldn'thelpbutnoticeyouhavea coupleofvisibletattoos.
much that I already missed young Max, you know, Moira. I
Canyoutellusaboutthem?
guess I'll miss seeing the world through his eyes, because I feel The ones on my upper arms ... one is the last page of the book
that he's a really empathetic and special person.
The Little Prince-my friend did that for me when I was
So,howdidbeinga partof TheL Wordchangeyourlife?
young. The other one is a road to an open door, which [was
For me it was about evolution, it was about living in the coundone] with just a needle and ink. I did that in Poland and it's
try of my origin and being a part of a conversation, a cultural
just about roads to open possibilities that maybe you've never
conversation, for the first time since I was a teenager. Because
even imagined yet.
I lived away for so long ... it was nice to step into being part of Whataboutyourupcoming
film,Don'tLookUp?
things, of (the] American political discourse, as an artist. It
Yeah, I acted in the film in springtime, so that should be out
changed my life also to be able to act-to challenge myself as sometime in the winter. It's by this guy, Fruit Chan. He's this
an actor and learn about filmmaking and have mentors that I
Chinese director and he's making a-it's not really a horror
could ask questions. It was like going to university for me.
movie. It's a ghost movie. It's about the haunting of a film set,
Tellusa littlebitaboutyourtimelivingabroad.
and I play an assistant director who is there in Romania. They
I played in a punk band, which brought me over to Europe,
are trying to film this [movie] and it's haunted. I think it's going
and I ended up staying over there, and then lived in a lot of to look really cool, too. It was a fun little project to do.
feel
............................................
38
I curve
From
'70s
•
icon to
modern
d aY
dyKon
The life and career of
the notorious Pam Grier.
By Rachel Shatto
Once hailed as the "baddest one-chick hit squad
that ever hit town" Pam Grier is, today, perhaps
most recognized for her role as Kit Porter on Showtime's The L Word. But long before Kit was serving
up chai tea lattes at The Planet, Grier was busy
kicking ass and blazing trails for women in film and
TV. Having forged a career out of playing strong,
sexy, savvy ladies who buck oppression and refuse
to be put in their place, Grier has carved out a
space for herself in both pop culture and feminist history. And the real Pam Grier? Well, let's just
say-Foxy Brown ain't got nothin' on her!
May 2009
I39
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0
....
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u,
C
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... a,
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a.
Although born in the United States, Grier was an Air Force
brat who spent most of her youth living on military bases in
England. Grier recalls that in Europe, the color of her skin
did not translate into inequality. Having been sheltered from
racial discrimination, Grier was shocked when she returned
home at 14 to live in Denver that the buses refused to stop
for her and her mother.
At 18, in an effort to generate college tuition funds, Grier
entered a beauty pageant. The only African American contestant, Grier knocked out the competition and caught the eye of
a Hollywood agent, who brought the budding star to Tinsel
Town. Soon after, while working as a switchboard operator
at American International Pictures, the striking Grier again
caught the eye of someone who would further her career. In
this case it was the B-movie king himsel£ Roger Corman.
Corman cast her in his women-in-prison film BlackMama,
White Mama. While the film itself is forgettable, Grier's
innate "it-girl" quality meant that her turn as the black mama
was just the beginning .
In 1973, Roe v. Wade was won, bras were ablaze and Billie
Jean King kicked Bobby Riggs' booty all over the tennis
court. At drive-ins and movie houses everywhere, audiences
were introduced to a legend in the making: Pam Grier in her
iconic role as the revenge fueled nurse Coffy, in the blaxploitation film of the same name.
Following the success of the film, the statuesque star
appeared in a series of payback-themed flicks, including Foxy
Brownand Sheba,Baby.In each, she represented the ultimate
independent woman, free of any man's control. And while
these films have become cult favorites and pop culture touchstones of the '70s, studio executives at the time were not con-
fident that the female revenge formula would be bankable.
"When they first saw CoffY:'explained Grier in a 1975
cover story interview with Ms. magazine, "No one thought it
would make any money. They said it was too depressing, that
the character was too strong and too serious. So, they cut it
up-taking out the most important scenes ... So all you see
is: bang, bang, shoot 'em up, tits and ass, bang, bang, bang. But
they kept saying, 'People will love it now:"
Growing up in the era of blaxploitation, director Quentin
Tarantino remembers in an interview with Charlie Rose
the impact Grier had in these early films, saying, "She really
owned a spot for women, in the '70s with those films that
America had really never seen before or since:'
A dubious guilty pleasure, Grier's early films-which bore
all the hallmarks of the genre-were packed with violence,
sex, zingy one-liners, fierce jumpsuits and feisty catfights.
One notable altercation in FoxyBrowntakes place at a lesbian
bar where Foxy shows one unlucky patron what it means to
have a black belt in barstools.
However, the prize for best all-female smack down (quite
possibly ever) goes to Coffy,in which hair is pulled, breasts
are exposed and razorblades-tucked
into Coffy's carefully
coifed '70s mega mullet-exact their vicious revenge.
What may be surprising to some is how these films, and
Grier hersel£ were embraced by feminists-so much so that
she was the first African American to grace the cover of Ms.
In the article, "The Mocha Mogul of Hollywood;' Jamaica
Kincaid explains how that could be. "Coffy,Foxy Brown an'd
Sheba, Baby have one outstanding redeeming value-they
are the only films to come out of Hollywood in a long time
to show us a woman who is independent, resourceful, self-
C
.,j
•
•
May 26: The Queen
of Blaxploitaton is
Born. Pamela Suzette
Grier is born to
Gwendolyn Samuels
and Clarence
Ransom Grier, in
Winston Salem, N.C.
Ms. Congeniality
goes to Hollywood.
Pam enters the Miss
Universe beauty
pageant and
wins the eye of a
Hollywood agent,
who convinces the
budding star to
move to Tinsel Town.
An E.R.A. near miss.
NOW leaders disrupt U.S.
Senate subcommittee
hearings demanding the
E.R.A. be heard by the
full Congress. The E.R.A.
passes in Congress but
falls short of the states
needed for ratification.
Fierce and Foxy. Lesbian bar
brawls and gladiatorial death
matches abound
in '7 4 as Pam stars
in the B-movie
gold Foxy Brown
and The Arena.
The baddest onechick hit squad hits
town. Pam headlines
the landmark film that
would earn her the title
queen of blaxploitation,
Coffy. Next up: Scream
B/acula Scream.
Roe v. Wade Win. Supreme Court rules
in favor of right to choose.
We're not crazy! The American
Psychiatric Association removes
homosexuality from its category /
of mental illnessesand disorders.
A Feminist Volley. Billie Jean King
serves a feminist beat down in "The
Battle of the Sexes" when she bests
Bobby Riggs on the tennis court.
40
Icurve
confident, strong and courageous. Above all, they are the only
films to show us a woman who triumphs!"
To Grier, it was also a matter of timing, "Coffy and Foxy
Brown are women of another time, literally exalting and
experiencing the goals [won] from the women's movement ...
It's OK for them to be independent. It's OK for them to not
be dependent on a man for validity;' explained Grier.
As the '70s-and the era of blaxploitation-came
to an
end, Grier kept busy with a series of roles in B movies and
Start telling your family members ... your life is changing,
as of this moment:' The diagnosis summoned the memory
of Grier's sister, whom she had lost to breast cancer. "Her
religion wouldn't let her have surgery. She was a Christian
Scientist and she died horribly:'
Having immediately begun treatment at Cedars-Sinai,
Grier recounted the surreal experience of encountering fans
in the hospital, "There [are] bracelets for every division-radiology, chemo-all up and down [my] arm and ... they don't
"Coffy and Foxy Brown are women of another time, literally exalting
and experiencing the goals [won] from the women's movement. It's
OK for them to not be dependent on a man for validity."
made guest appearances on television in The Love Boat and
Night Court. She also took the time to develop as a character
actor, most notably in the Paul Newman film Fort Apache,
the Bronx (1981), in which she showed off her acting chops
with her turn as a homicidal junkie prostitute. However, a
star vehicle continued to elude her.
In 1988, she appeared to be on the verge of a comeback.
Having just wrapped Above the Law with action sensation
Steven Seagal (remember, it was the '80s), she was dealt a
shocking blow: She was diagnosed with stage-five cancer.
Believing she was in excellent health, Grier was in for her
regular annual check-up when her physician discovered the
condition. "Your life hits a wall;' said Grier. "You're going to
die-you've got less than two years. Get your will in order.
Pam's blaxploits end.
Pam winds down
her career of vicious
revenge against "The
Man" with Sheba,
Baby and Friday Foster.
A Mocha Mogul.
Pam is the first African
American to grace
the cover of Ms.
magazine.
G.I. Janes. Women are
admitted to American
military academies for
the first time.
even see that [I'm] an inpatient. They see [me] as the icon:'
While in the hospital Grier suffered a second loss. "My
lover at the time abandoned me;' she recalled. "He didn't
show up. He refused to return my phone calls, my clothes,
my things ... [It] was so painful. It's like, one day you're madly
in love with a person and you live with them for three years
and [the next] they, like, get up from the table and walk
away... Are you going to survive thisr Cut your wristr What
are you going to dot
She did what she always did: Pam Grier rallied. And she
was not alone, both her family and her friends came to her
support (including Miami Vice creator Michael Mann, who
wanted to sneak her downstairs for a ride in his Ferrari).
Grier laughs as she recalls the time Peter Douglas-
Pam gets serious. All camp aside,
Pam showed she has what it takes
as a homicidal hooker in Fort
Apache, the Bronx.
Pryor conviction.
Pam stars with
then-lover Richard
Pryor in the biopic
Greased Lightning.
The pair split
shortly after when
she discovered he
was engaged to
another woman.
October 14: We're here.
We're queer. 75,000
queer men and women
participate in the first
National March on
Washington for Gay
and lesbian rights.
Justice is served. Sandra Day
O'Connor is appointed as the first
woman to the Supreme Court.
Rockin' the (looove)
boat. Pam guest stars
on everyone's favorite
cruise liner d'amour.
Witching hour and a half.
Pam gets spooky as the
Dust Witch in Something
Wicked This Way Comes.
.,.. ___
Lady veep? Geraldine
Ferraro, tapped by
presidential hopeful Walter
Mondale, is the first woman
V.P. candidate.
Miami mama. Pam's recurring
part as NYPD cop Valerie
Gordon on Miami Vice is the best
thing to happen to Crockett and
Tubbs since neon and cuffed
sleeves.
May 2009 j 41
brother of Michael Douglas-arrived in her room and hosted an impromptu party for her and her mother. "He showed
up with a blender and some margarita mix and a bottle of tequila, and they got drunk. And when they turned their backs,
I had some, too. 'Pam, you have alcohol on your breath?''No:
Because I can't have Demerol and alcohol. I was having double shooters:'
Having successfully beat the cancer with a combination
of chemotherapy and Eastern medicine, Grier picked up the
pieces and got back to work, continuing to appear in minor
TV roles, including a recurring character on Crime Story and
Miami Vice and a guest appearance on The FreshPrince of
Bel Air.
With a gift for picking films destined to be cult hits, Grier
also landed a few small but memorable parts on the big screen:
in the homicidal mean girl opus Jawbreaker,John Carpenter's
Escapefrom L.A. and Tim Burton's Mars Attacks.
In 1997, she found herself back in the limelight in the title
role of Quentin Tarantino's homage to blaxploitation, Jackie
Brown.The film introduced Grier to a new generation of fans
and put her back on the map as a marquee actor.
At the time, Tarantino was coming off the massive
success of his film Pulp Fiction, which had catapulted the
all-but-forgotten John Travolta back to stardom. Aware that
the press would draw parallels with his casting decisions for
Jackie Brown, Tarantino made his reasons for choosing her
plain. In an interview with Charlie Rose he recalls saying to
her,"Now look-a lot of people are going to come to you and
they are going to start talkin' this John Travolta business and
everything, and you can't pay any attention to any of that, all
right? This is not about that. This is about you being the per-
feet actress to play this role and that's why you're getting cast.
Not because you won some '70s revival contest:'
In actuality, Grier's playing the title role was a foregone
conclusion; while adapting the screenplay for Jackie Brown
from Elmore Leonard's book Rum Punch,Tarantino intentionally tailored the role to be a perfect fit for Grier, including
changing the character from white to black and changing the
last name from Burke to Brown, as a nod to Foxy Brown.
The film-which many consider to be Grier's best workcast her alongside Robert De Niro, Michael Keaton and
Robert Forster, as well as Samuel L. Jackson, who, in an
interview with US magazine, remembered Grier fondly from
her early films. "I hadn't thought of her as all those [characters she played] until one day when we were doing a scene
and I had my hands on her throat, [and] I realized: Oh, my
God, I'm about to choke Foxy Brown!"
Grier may have reaffirmed her icon status with the success of]ackie Brown,but it wasn't until 2004 that she became
a bona fide dykon by taking a chance on a risky Showtime
project, TheL Word.
Grier plays the part of Kit Porter, an ex-alcoholic and
former '80s musician turned coffeehouse-club owner who
is the half-sister of Bette, Jennifer Beals' character. While
primarily hetero, Kit is frequently dismissed as the "straight
one:' However, in both her brief relationship with Drag King
Ivan Aycock, played by Kelly Lynch, and a botched one night
stand with Papi, Kit explores-and underscores-the fluidity of sexuality, which is a recurring theme in the series. She
also provides an alternative body type to the waifish L.A. glamazons for fans to admire (and drool over).
As Kit, Grier depicts yet another woman living a life
•I
Action Jackson. Pam
stars alongside the
ponytailed martial arts
master Steven Seagal,
as his partner Delores
"Jacks" Jackson in the
'80s action hit Above
the Law.
Down but not out.
Diagnosed with cancer, Pam rallies with
the help of friends,
family and a mixture of
Eastern and Western
medicine.
Class dismissed. In a
road warrior-esque
dystopian high school
of the future in Closs
of 1999, robo-teachers
(including Pam as Ms.
Connors) are enlisted to
calm campus violence,
only to go rogue and get
their student murder on.
Pam gets fresh. Pam
guest stars as an old
flame of Uncle Phil on
The Fresh Prince of
Bel Air.
A women's rights
breakthrough.
Congress passes the
Violence Against
Women Act.
A Camp-tastic voyage.
With the films Escape from
L.A. and Mars Attacks Pam
reaffirms her status as cult
film star maven and fangrrl
fave.
A presidential
copout.
President
Clinton
institutes the
"Don't Ask,
Don't Tell"
policy for gays
in the military.
42 I curve
Female oppression.
Amnesty
International issues
a report on the
status of women in
Taliban-controlled
Afghanistan.
Tarantino's badass tribute.
Pam makes her mainstream
comeback in Quentin
Tarantino's film Jackie
Brown, in a role the director
customized for the actor, as
a nod to her early blaxploitation films.
Albright gets
green light.
Madeleine
Albright is
sworn in as the
first female U.S.
Secretary of
State.
Girls got game.
The first season
of the WNBA. The
next year, Pam
shows her balls on
MTV Rock 'n Jock
Football and a
decade later
she speaks
at the Gay
Games.
unshackled from the limitations that previous women strugto play, "I had my Wii set up in (my trailer]. Daniela (Sea]
gled against. Her character is free to pursue her dreams to be and I would be in there and everyone else would be out there
a musician and, like Grier herself, is a by-product of the femi- working and we'd just be rocking that trailer, laughing and
nist movement. "Kit was living [and] experiencing all of the screaming, playing tennis:'
things that her mother and her contemporaries had opened
And it was on the set that Grier trained her sights on her
up doors for;' says Grier.
next project: a memoir. During a conversation, Jennifer Beals
While the feminist aspects to the role were familiar
suggested that Grier write about her experiences."! had to do
to Grier, when it came to the LGBT community, Grier
the book of my life, about everything I've done and survived.
explained why starring in The L Word was an eye-opening
Good, bad, right and wrong:'
experience. "It used to be 'us and them; and it's now 'ours; so
Unsurprisingly, Grier had little trouble convincing pubI now have a different perspective, and a great respect for the lishers, and the book is due to come out later this year. She
believes the story of how she saved the life of a wounded
education [I received] just from doing The L Word. It has just
been the most magnificent experience-not
only as an actor, horse by rushing it to the vet-in the back of her yellow
but also learning the social and political context:'
Jaguar-dosed
the deal.
At the time, Grier was engaged to and living with comeWhen the series came to an end, Grier expressed her disappointment that they wouldn't be able to pursue story lines dian Richard Pryor, when his beloved horse was attacked
exploring how far women still have to go in many parts of by dogs. "(Richard] was in the road, crying, hysterical. And
I said 'We're going to get this horse to the vet: So we opened
the world.
"We had a lot more stories to tell, and I think we could the four-door and pulled him into the back seat, and ripped
have gone on, easily, two more years. I think we could get into down (Interstate] 405 to the vet in Sherman Oaks;' Grier
recalled, laughing. "People following us [were saying], 'There
other countries [where] women's oppression is still evident ...
and [women can] still be put to death because of being gay are two black people, one's in a bathrobe with a big afro [and]
there's a horse in the back seat of a Jaguar: Yes, I am crazy, I
or lesbian:'
But for Grier, the hardest part of the series coming to a am going to save a life. I don't care about the car:'
Though Quentin Tarantino once referred to the actor as
close was saying goodbye to the castmates with whom she'd
"the queen of women;' and many consider her to be a living
formed such close bonds. She'd become a bit of a den mother
legend (although she is too modest to consider herself one),
to the cast, in particular to actor Kate Moennig, who Grier
Grier is•content to be seen as an artist trying to make a differjokes is her love child with actor Christopher Walken."Don't
let me loose on that man! An egg will find its way;' laughed . ence. "When people respond to me and are passionate about
my work for such a long time, I am humbled by the fact that
Grier.
But unofficial den mother or not, Grier still found time they like what I do, that they share my passion with me:'
'
'
.4
Meet Kit Porter.
A mean girl cautionary
tale. Pam pops up as a
detective searching for
the missing popular girl
in Jawbreaker, a dark
comedy about what
it takes to be the high
school queen bee.
Oops! Pam appears as
Flura Nash, mother of
Eddie Murphy, in the box
office bomb and six-time
Razzie nominated, The
Adventures of Pluto Nash.
Pam joins the cast
of Showtime' s
The L Word as the
notorious Kit Porter.
The Boston queer party.
Same-sex marriage is
legalized in
Massachusetts.
Ghostface thrilla'.
Pam battles
intergalactic baddies
on the red planet
in John Carpenter's
Ghost of Mars. Then
does it up for Bones
with Snoop Dog.
Howdy, partner.
California adopts
a domestic
partnership law.
State of
the unions.
Vermont
becomes
the first state
to legally
recognize
civil unions.
Same work, same pay.
President Obama signs
the Lilly Ledbetter Fair
Pay Act.
Union busting. On May 16,
The California Supreme
Court rules that the state
constitution allows same-sex
couples the right to marry,
and tens of thousands do.
However, in November, with
the passage of Prop. 8, gays
are stripped of their rights.
May 2009
I43
y es say
,
o me, there's not a big
f the human race. I
e out can I be?"
LeishaHailey(Vol.15#2)
on coming out: "After
high school, I started
going to gay bars, but
I'd go in secret. I'd go by
myself after school. And
I was sort of discovering
this life by myself."
RachelMaddow(Vol.5 #2):on
being an out Rhodes Scholar: "I
couldn't have made a case for
myself if I had been closeted. So
much of my political involvement
is tied up in me being a big dyke."
or o.
king nothing
[lesbianism] an
beautiful thing.
EllenDeGeneres
#6) on her first I
film: "Personal
was it Hazel? N
w
EllenPage(Vol.16#7):"I feel like
there's so much negative portrayal
of women in media and film, it's just
great to be doing roles like these. I
mean, what does it say that we live
in a world where 'feminism' is a bad
word? What could possibly be more
patriarchal than that?"
CherryJones(Vol.14 #8):
SarahShahi(Vol.15 #6):"I get so
tired of answering one question
over and over. And that's, 'How
do lesbians have sex?' I mean,
they have sex. Everybody has
sex. How do you have sex?"
"Girls take a lot of shit.
A girl who is a serious
musician who wants
to succeed is a threat.
I've been spit on and
had shit thrown -------"---'~AmyRay(Vol.4 #6):"There are
at me, just for
people who are just tired of doing
being a girl."
benefits; they just want to play
their music. Some people are
scared to stand up for things,
too. I mean you're not going to
get Wynonna Judd to do a prochoice benefit, because a big
country performer is going to lose
a lot of [her] audience by doing
something like this."
LisaEdelstein
(Vol.6 #5):"I've seen
some beautiful lesbians around
town, who are stunning and have
an edge to them that is really
sexy. I don't see that on television
lesbians. I'd love to see that!"
Margaret
Cho(Vol.12#5):"To me, the
lesbian butch is the sexiest thing
imaginable, because she is so defiant
of culture and so defiant of the world
in her sexuality and in her strength
and to me, that's really healing."
PatriciaField(Vol.6 #2):
"So, to me, lesbian chic
just means that there's
a group of lesbians
removing themselves
from the stereotype and
presenting themselves
in a way that people are
seeing as interesting,
attractive and therefore
fashionable."
"Everyone always says,
'So, were you gay in
that?' And I usually say,
'Well, you know what,
I'm pretty much gay in
probably anything I do.' "
JoanJett(Vol.16#6):
7): "The best thi
as to see clearl
o fall in love with
Staceyann
Chin(Vol.11 #6):
"The skinny women are ...
nice to look at-kind of like
dancing beans, you know?
I like to see them shake
their little booties, but I
wouldn't want to take any
of them home."
k.d.lang(Vol.1O#6) "When
All You Can Eat came out,
people just totally read
that as a sexual innuendo.
I was really more of a
statement on my position
with fame, rather than my
position with sexuality."
J.D.Samson
(Vol.14#8):"It's just important to do
what you need to do in your life to keep going.
The things we believe in are not changing and the
ways that we are activists and feminists, that'.s not
changing. I just think it's cool to keep your mind
open and let everybody come to the party."
Tristan
Taormino
(Vol.9 #2):"I can be sexually
turned on by a lot of different dykes: punk
dykes, porn stars, high femmes, but I fall
for butches. Butches melt me, make my
knees buckle, my breath comes up short
just looking at them."
An lesbian traveler searches for authenticity. By Gillian Kendall
HIS MAY NOT be authentic Bali, but it's very nice:' I called
out this observation to my partner across the mosaic-rich,
marbled expanse of our indoor-outdoor bathroom-garden.
Nie was inside our Villa Kubu suite, lounging on the canopied bed and playing with the state-of-the-art, iPod-friendly
sound system. As she tucked the hotel's high-end toiletries
into our luggage, I lit candles and environmentally correct
mosquito-repelling incense sticks. Meanwhile, I was filling up a bathtub the size of our Honda, using more fresh
water than I'd seen for a year in drought-stricken Australia.
I poured in lavender bath salts and strewed the surface with
frangipani petals from the garden. Then we spent several
hours lolling in that decadent amenity. I contemplated the
equatorial stars overhead, observed and felt akin to the overfed, glimmering goldfish in the adjacent pond and listened to
the soothing sound of our waterfall (controlled by a dimmer
switch). The next morning, we swam in our private infinity
pool and then got massaged by tiny, strong, gorgeous women
who afterward, over fresh ginger tea, regaled us with stories
of life on the island. It was luxurious and lovely but not really
authentic-except
maybe for the tea.
On my second trip to the Indonesian island, I was
determined to track down the real Bali, the place beyond the
Disneylandish tourist hubs of the southern peninsula, where
sunburnt Australians throng the streets and hurl away their
vacation money on beer, sarongs and Balinese kitsch. That's
the part of Bali that was bombed in 2002 and 2005, andwhile I was appalled and saddened by the damage inflicted
on the Balinese residents-it's clear why the terrorists chose
that target.
In my search for accommodations and relaxation on trip
No. 2, I was eager to get beyond those beaches and bars and
to discover the real Bali, or what was left of it.
The easiest experiences to have in Bali are the luxury ones,
especially since U.S. dollars stretch so far. If that's what you're
looking for, I recommend the couples' Moonlight Massage at
Laguna Resort and Spa, which is followed by dessert in a
private, heavily canopied outdoor pavilion-bed at the edge
of the beach. In the glowing moonlight, they rub you with
sweet oils, feed you cocktails and chocolate, then leave you
and your partner alone in a Bedouin-style tent to devise your
own amusements.
My in-laws, both competitive golfers who have played the
links around the world, found the Greg Norman-designed
course at Le Meridien both challenging and beautiful. My
father-in-law was particularly taken by the par-4 stretch that
requires a drive across a sea-filled chasm.
Also in the nice-but-not-authentic category, I'd add the
gay ( mostly men's) bars of Seminyak and Kuta, such as Q
Bar or the Double Six Club, and the sumptuous, gay-friendly
Elysian Villas-a fabulous hotel at the pinnacle of tasteful
indulgence and discretion.
But you can spend only so many hours being pampered
before you start to feel the desire for a little nitty-gritty.
After taking in the fantastic food and rice-paddy views at
Waka Gangga, Nie and I took a walk to the local village. We
Bali (clockwise from top left): Catching a ride in the elephant sanctuary; one of thousands of shrines in the rainforest; offerings to
assure good sales at an outdoor market; Tabanan Beach at sunset
discovered that those green, velvety-looking pathways that
so charmingly divide the rice paddies into terraces are actually narrow, stony little ledges that occasionally will cause a
heavy Westerner to fall knee-deep into black, sticky mud.
I lost my shoes, tore the seat of my pants and cut my foot,
which I later had to wash in a tetanus-laden stream. This
was an authentic experience.
That morning we were also introduced to the parts of
Bali that are neither authentic nor nice. Our route took us
@' along streams that seemed to serve as open sewers-in which
people were washing clothes-and
past piles of washed-up
garbage on the beach, just a few thousand yards from the lush
resorts. In Sanur and Kuta, we got tired of being pestered to
buy stuff every time we left our villa. "Take a look! Take a
look!" was the mantra of shopkeepers along every street in
the tourist towns, and they weren't shy about grabbing our
UJ
arms to steer us into their stalls, either.
But I learned that hearty greetings are traditional-it's
not
0
just a sales technique to greet people with an enthusiastic
hello and a big smile. The Balinese treat one another with
the same friendliness. I learned how to say "Hello;' "Good
ci
day" and "No, thank you" in Balinese, :md I remembered
how to talk to strangers without assuming they were after
g
g
t
Fora surreal
wintryexperience,
Sweden's
ICEHOTEL
istheplaceto go.Every
year,beginning
inthelatefall,artists,
architects
andartisans
fromallover
theworldconverge
onJukkasjarvi,
a Swedish
village
justnorthoftheArctic
Circle.
Relying
onlyonfrozenwaterfromtheTomeRiver,
theycreateanart
exhibition,
including
theICEHOTEL
itself,aswellassculptures
onthegrounds
andevenanicechurch.
Starting
withskeleton
structures
madeofwood
andmetal,theseartisans
use"snice"
(a special
combination
ofsnowand
ice)fromtheTometo buildthereception
area,morethan80 rooms,
andthe
Absolut
lceBar.
It's darkattheICEHOTEL
formostoftheday,butthereflected
lightdancingoffthesnowandiceisamazing.
Don'tdineattheICEHOTEL
restaurantinstead,
takea strolla miledowntheroadtotheOldHomestead.
It'smore
casual,
lessexpensive
andprovides
biggerportions
andfasterservice.
Thetemperature
inside
theICEHOTEL
isusually
about-5 degrees
Celsius
butspending
thenightonanicebedis noproblem:
Juststripdowntoyour
longjohns,gloves
andhat,takethethermalsleeping
bagprovided
bythe
hotelintoyourroom,zipyourself
upandhavea greatsleepuntilthestaff
wakesyouwithwarmlingonberry
juiceat 6 a.m.Andyes,therearewarm
toiletsjusta fewstepsaway.
Andasforadventure,
basicdogsledding
isaboutasmuchexcitement
as
you'llneed.Thistwo-hour
rideoverhillanddale,withanawe-inspiring
view
ofthesunandthemoonhanging
intheskyalongside
eachotherasyourace
alongfrozenriversandthrough
snow-covered
forests,
is beyond
astonishing.
Ataround
$300a night,theICEHOTEL
isn'tcheap,butit'sstillinexpensive
as
adventures
go.[Stephanie
Schroeder]
LL
0
ti;" mymoney.
:)
...J
ci
The best experiences were the ones I'd label both nice and
authentic. Buying handmade batik fabrics in amazing prints
and colors rated high, as did the meals my partner's family
enjoyed, which involved heaps of roast pork and sugarcane
skewers of chicken satay, while the sole, stoic vegetarian (me)
111eBest of Bali continued on page 63
May2009j47
Woman vs. Jiatur~
Deep-sea fishing brings out the warrior in one lesbian traveler. By Mary McGrath
TWAS STILL RAINING in Los Angeles. Call it global warming, La Nina or whatever, but it was dismal here.
Outside, it was so gray; you couldn't even tell what time it
was. I was whiter than Casper and way more testy and even
a double latte at Starbucks didn't improve my mood. I knew
I had to get away. Fortunately; I was soon zooming off to
Ixtapa, on the Pacific side of Mexico, looking for an escape.
But little did I know what an unexpected adventure was
awaiting me.
In Ixtapa, I decided to park my bum at the newly renovated
Club Med. Those of you with children should take note. This
place might finally be the babysitter you need. You can drop
your kids off in the morning, do whatever your heart desires
during the day and pick them up in the late afternoon. Once
you're there, you can hit the spa, take cultural tours and, of
course, indulge in lots of outdoor activities while a host of
gorgeous G .O.s ( aka gracious organizers-think
camp counselors) have to guarantee you a good time. No wonder the
parents I met, both gay and straight, looked really relaxed.
I'm a sports junkie, so after playing tennis, snorkeling,
kayaking and swimming, I knew I had to kick it up a notch
and try something new. On my trip to Ixtapa Island, I'd
met Janet and Eli, a couple of gynecologists who were into
deep-sea fishing. I hadn't gone fishing in at least 10 years, but
when they suggested I join them, I couldn't refuse. Visions
of marlin and sailfish came to mind, and, although the trip
seemed safe enough, I knew anything could happen out on
those rugged waters. They' re dark and very deep. Sort of like
in Earnest Hemingway's The Old Man and the Sea.
48
Icurve
The boat embarked promptly at 7:30 a.m. Several
Hemingway stories swirled in my head, and adrenaline
began pumping through my veins. Soon we began trolling the
deep. Within about 15 minutes, the teal waters had turned
darker than twilight as we moved farther and farther from
shore. The resort's rainbow began sinking into the horizon as
our guide, Miguel, began to prepare the rods.
Eli, one of the gynecologists, plopped down into the chair
and waited, his eyes fixated on the water. Barn! He got his
first strike. The line began its gearlike pull and the fish lunged
forward, diving into deeper water. The rod bent, pointing
downward into the ocean.
Its severe arc made it look
like Moby Dick was on the
line. Eli began the dance of
prey versus predator, but he
was making little progress.
The rod continued to bow
and shake until it snapped
free, and Eli stumbled back
into his chair.
"Must have been a huge
mackerel;' he remarked,
because their razor-like teeth
can snap almost any line.
Kyle, our exuberant G.O.,
was on board next, ready to
make up for that first missed
fish. Soon, there was a strike
and he began pulling. We
thought it was a keeper until we saw some feeble flapping
on the surface of the water. Sadly; it was a cormorant that
had mistaken the lure for live bait. The bird whipped its
wings back and forth in vain until Kyle gingerly reeled it in
and brought it on board. He gently removed the hook from
its thigh. The bird scrambled back into the water, waving a
r
thankful goodbye. Dismayed, we set up for the next catch. [
Maybe the women on this trip would have better luck.
Gyno Janet was up next. As a self proclaimed "travel slut;'
with scores of worldly escapades to her credit, she was someone who would 'go anywhere, with anyone, anytime:• Now
that's a nice mantra. I wondered what she was like in her
0
20s. These days, she looked a bit like a cross between Lauren
Bacall and Simone Signoret, and had an attitude to match. I G
knew she was no dummy when it came to fishing. She was a
seasone d pro.
0
She braced herself in the chair and prepared to conquer. z
Quickly, there was a strike. Her rod dipped and dove down- a:
g
g
ward into the deep, her muscular arms churning to and fro
as she drew in her prey. A 12-pound black tuna wrestled on
the line, the gaping hook a menace to anyone who came near.
The fish flapped around wildly, its mouth begging for mercy.
Miguel unhinged the hook and placed the tuna in the bucket.
Score one for the home team.
My turn was next. I've always been a competitive athlete,
especially against men, and I didn't want to let Janet down.
I braced myself in the chair and prepared for battle. Strike,
down he went. I churned the reel as the pull of the rod made
me zigzag wildly from side to side. The line darted to the
left and dashed to the right until I could see the faint shimmer of the fish's white belly shining about six feet below the
surface. I yanked up on my rod and reeled in the line as the
shimmering mass became larger. The dance of light emerged
from the ocean and soon there was a wild squirming on deck,
the creature flailing desperately to get out of the boat. Miguel
grabbed the fish and helped me usher it aboard. Before me
was a 13-pound yellowtail, the length of my thigh, doing the
hully-gully for its life. We managed to get it into the bucket
and I collapsed into the chair. Hemingway would have been
proud.
Then Janet was at bat again, ready for a homer. The pitch,
the strike, and soon she was rounding the bases with another
black tuna. She hauled in her prize, mopping the sweat from
her brow. This one was easily 15 pounds.
There really are few things sexier than a woman wrangling
a very large fish she caught with her own hands.
Miguel was on the prowl for another place to fish and
began steering us toward some menacing rocks. Slowly he
backed the boat toward the thrashing waves as we bobbed
against the hungry tide. I had visions of being churned
beneath its fury. Janet paled as the boat inched closer and
closer to the rocks. If our motor stalled, we'd be goners. The
boat continued its drunken dance as the waves grabbed for
us, hungry in their pursuit. There were no fish here though,
so Miguel fired up the motor and returned to calmer waters.
What was that? A bird? A plane? No, it was a large ray
leaping out of the black sea like a Concorde jet. There it went
again. The dorsal fins of dolphins churned in the distance.
Were there sharks or whales below? Either one could easily
splinter this boat into a pile of driftwood if we didn't get out
of there. The winds had increased and we realized we were
no match for the fish below. Five adults against thousands of
sea creatures? No, thank you. We'd had more than enough
excitement for one day.
As Janet and I paraded through the Club with our bounty, I
felt that I'd discovered something primal in mysel£ I understood the value of those who provide. The warrior in me was
unleashed and well-rewarded. Now I was a bona fide member of a tribe. I decided to celebrate at the clubs that night
and fish for another kind of wildlife.
THE ROAD TO RECOVERY.
____,.__NOTEVERYBODY'S
SURFIN'
NOW----Lesbian athletes talk about discrimination in this laid back sport. By Gillian Kendall
If it's an open secret that an above-average number of
women surfers are lesbian, it's an unwritten rule that queer
surfers keep quiet about it. "Think about it," says one male
Hawaiian surfer who requested to remain anonymous.
"Have you ever heard of a pro, gay, guy surfer?" Indeed, it
was difficult to get queer surfers on the record for fear of
losing their sponsorships.
Surfing careers are short, and so is funding for them. The
few companies that subsidize women's tours, such as O'Neill,
RipCurl, Op, Billabong and Quiksilver's women's brand,
Roxy, have the power to cut a surfer off from her main source
of income faster than you can say,"Dyke next door:'
Of course, that's part of the deal. Surf gear makers don't go
into business to raise consciousness or subsidize alternative
lifestyles: They support winning athletes to promote their
brands. Most pay well, but few are said to be gay-friendly, and
many sources claim that Roxy discriminates against lesbians.
Is there truth to this, or is it just an urban legend?
Johnathan Jenkins, media manager for Quiksilver/Roxy
Australasia, says the brand chooses surfers based on "a
combination of factors;' including "ability, age, appearance,
personality and possibly other lifestyle elements, like skat-
ing, long-board or short-boarding:' Women who embody
the "Roxy spirit;' he says, are "beautiful, confident, alive,
natural and fun. All that positive stuff-intelligent,
capable,
confident:'
None of that "positive stuff" excludes lesbians. And plenty
of dykes look hot in a bikini. So why can't pro surfers be out
and proud?
What would happen if one of those "Roxy spirit" women
turned out to be queer? Jenkins doesn't know. "That's a very
sensitive question;' he notes, and passes it on to Lisa Grey,
Roxy's marketing manager in Australia. Her answer: In the
case of a sponsored athlete coming out as a lesbian, "Roxy
would continue to support and encourage her:'
Despite the official line from Roxy, sources familiar with
the pro women's surf circuit say that lesbians lucky enough
to receive endorsements stay closeted. They live with their
partners and make no secret
of their orientation until, say,
curve wants an interview.
Then it's don't ask, don't tell.
It's hard to understand
why such pressure still exists
BOOKS
TOGETYOUGOING
in 2009.
Lynne Boyer was born in 1956 and surfed from age
11. After moving to Hawaii, she fell in love with the
sport and started competing on the amateur circuit. "There
was always just a handful of girls back then-it was so rare
to see a girl in the water.
"I started getting pretty good at it. People would ask,
'Why don't you enter the competitions?' So, that's what I
did. My mom would take me to them and I'd do good-first
or second place;' says the two-time World Champion (1978
and 1979).
"But back then all the gay stuff was always in the closet. I
didn't come out until I got clean and sober, in 1981. Through
the (12-step) programs, I figured out that maybe I was gay.
"Before that, I wondered, because my best friend was, and
she tried to get me to be with her. I was very understanding
and accepting when she came out, and then she kissed me
and ... I would end up doing some stuff with her, but I was
wasted and didn't know what I was doing. I'd have the most
terrible hangovers, the worst remorse ... I would hate mysel£
I thought it was very wrong.
"I was very unsure of my sexuality, and I wasn't dealing
with it. (Being gay) wasn't all over the TV. Ellen wasn't here.
It took years of therapy, and more than one therapist, to figure out who I am, and that it's OK. I've met the woman of my
life now. It's wonderful to have a partner; I just love it:'
These days, Boyer is a professional artist who surfs for
fun. It's difficult to know for sure how much the industry
has changed since Boyer was a pro, but she recognizes that
an element of fear still exists. "Some of the gay women surfers
have said they can't (come out), because of the philosophy ...
the (sponsors) cater to young women, with parents, and if
the surfer is gay, the parents won't buy the products. That's
what the fear is:'
What advice would she give to young pros? Should they
come out and risk losing sponsorships, or stay closeted?
Boyer says, "I can't really answer it for other people, but it
depends on the person's strength within themselves, and how
0
good a surfer they are. If they are in high demand and outffi ripping everybody and have that top-award-winning surfer
§I- power in combination with good looks, I would say to go for
it: come out first. But if they aren't in the top one or two,
0
and aren't the model surfer-girl that is in high demand from
the sponsors, I would say to come out afterward in a more
politically-strategic style. Maybe, even with the good looks
Q and champion surfing ability, [they should) come out after, in
lli a more strategic manner.
ii5
"It would probably take someone like Martina
Navratilova. She was already established as a tennis queen
when she came out. It's still kind of backward in the surfing
JayneWilliamsis on a missionto helpyoudiscoveryourinnerjock,
no matterhowmanylayersof doubt,fear andself-loathingit maybe
hidingbehind.Williamsknowsfirsthandthe abjectterrorof wearing
spandexin public,of beingthe lastto finisha raceandwhat it's like to
be a perfectathletetrappedin an imperfectbody.In fact,if thereis a
messiahof fitness,shemightbe it. In herbook,SlowFat Triathlete:
PursueYourAthleticDreamsin theBodyYouHaveNow(DaCapo
LifelongBooks),Williamssharesherloveof sportandhealthymovementwith the sad,downtrodden
andleft behind.Williamswritesin a funny,
engagingstylethat encourages
everyoneto comealongfor the ride.Her
adviceis practicalandempowering,
coveringtopicslike howto avoidchafing,beingproudof whoyouareandlearningto embraceyourbodilyfluids.
Amen,andpassthe Gatorade.
If you'dratherheadto the gymthanintothe
greatoutdoors(read:avoidweatherandbugs),checkout TheNewRulesof
ForsytheandAlwynCosgrove
Liftingfor Womenby LouSchuler,Cassandra
(Avery).Didyouknowthat womengenerallyrecovermorequicklyfrom
intensestrength-training
workoutsthanmen?Orthat our musclefibersare
essentiallythe sameas men's,so a mananda womanin the sametraining
programgainstrengthat aboutthe samerate?Unfortunately,
if youvisit any
gymyou'llseewomenusingteeny-tinyweightsandkillingthemselvesonthe
Stairmasterinsteadof unlockingtheir awesomestrengthpotential.Thisbook
will helpyouunderstandwhystrengthtrainingis importantfor everywoman,
why it won't turn youintoa she-hulk,why intensestrengthtrainingburns
morecaloriesthancardioandhowbeingstrongwill helpyoulive longerand
better.[HeatherRobinson]
community. Nobody's done it yet. It just takes one brave
soul with star power and lots of support from family and
friends behind her:'
For now, it doesn't look like anyone is willing to take the
plunge, but there is a whole new generation of talented athletes who might be able to open the closet door for women's
surfing. One of these is Stephanie Lay, a built, petite surfer
who came to the Aloha state from Texas and a tough background. Even though her mother was an out lesbian, she
found it difficult to come out hersel£ "It wasn't a blessing, my
mom being gay. It was hard for me to come out," she says.
"I associated homosexuality with irresponsibility:' Having
found a new home and a new way of life in Hawaii, she surfs
for fun and makes her living as a personal trainer. At 29,
she says she's not looking to go pro. "Surfing is like going to
church;' she says. "It's where I go to pray:'
Another potential rising star is Kayko Tamaki. Like Lay,
she hasn't gone pro, but she seems to embody the"Roxy spirit:' Born and raised in Hawaii by Japanese and Jewish Italian
parents, she looks part Polynesian, part Egyptian. She's a
go-go dancer-model-events planner-bartender whose latest
venture is riding very big waves. Glamorous, polyamorous
Tamaki loves to long-board and has worked a surf instructor for Japanese tourists. Of the current don't-ask-don't-tell
scenario for gay surfers, Kayko says, "That's so sad:' She
suggests that it's common for women athletes to love and
appreciate their own bodies, and to love other women, too.
She compares pro surfing today to basketball and tennis a
few decades ago. "Surfing is a relatively new pro sport for
women, and, over time, I'm positive it will
May 2009
I51
·--------THEWAYOFTHEPUCK----~
Brush up on your hockey dyke culture on and off the ice. By Mette Bach
you might expect. Homophobia, for example, is not their
main obstacle.
"It happens;• says Naylor. "But it's nothing above and
beyond what might happen anywhere, like occasional strange,
disapproving looks:'
Nancy Drolet, who played on Canada's Olympic team,
actually came out and got married to her longtime partner. When the media showed up to crash her wedding, she
deflated them by stating that her sexuality was never something she kept secret. Drolet, who started playing ice hockey
at a young age, made an exceptional climb in the ice hockey
ranks. The pinnacle of the sport for women is the few Senior
Women's League teams spread across North America. They
don't get salaries, sponsorship or media attention, so many of
them also have day jobs.
Professional hockey according to the National Hockey
League, is simply not played by women, lesbian or otherwise. While homophobia may not be a problem, sexism
is still alive and well, and being denied a chance to play
professional hockey hits hard on many levels. The social
implications are huge, but it's the
monetary ramifications that are the
most prohibitive. Women who play ice
hockey face the huge financial burden
that is hockey equipment. The gear can
cost well over $1,000 if you buy it new.
Even resourceful women will tell you
it's worth it to shell out for new gear,
often quipping, "Have you ever smelled
Across the country, hockey enthusiasts share a passion
ignited by ice, kneepads and long, wooden sticks. Regardless
of whether we consider ourselves players, spectators or playoff widows, it's hard to deny the importance of the sport in
the lesbian community.
Hockey works on a lot of levels. You don't have to play
the game to consider yourself a hockey dyke. Some hockey
dykes make bets, some wear
jerseys and have favorite teams,
while others are mostly in it for
the beer and the socializing.
The sport is a way of life for
Wanttoimpress
thatcutehockey
dyke?
many lesbians.
Here'swhatyouneedtoknow:
''A woman would have to be
HOCKEY
101: THEBASICS
extremely special for me to pass
up a playoffs game to be with
her;' says hockey fan Mel Bissell.
Otherwise, she would be at
home glued to the television for
the duration of the postseason.
Ice hockey player Steph
Naylor not only watches the
sport but also throws most of
her energy into playing. "There
is nowhere I would rather be
than on the ice;' she says.
The challenges facing hockey
dykes, they say, are not the ones
52
Icurve
• Hockey
season
isSeptember
through
March.Playoffs
arepostseason
andcanlast
untilJune.
enthusiast
during
a game.Yourrespect
for
thegamewillmeana lottoher.
• Youdon'thaveto havea favoriteteam,
butit'sa nicetouchto knowa thingortwo
aboutyourhometeam(eitheryourcity's
teamortheteamclosest
to yourcity).If you
arestuck,it is safeto saythatyoulovedthe
Edmonton
OilersduringtheGretzky
era.
• TheNational
Hockey
League
iscomprised
of30teamsthatcompete
witheachotherto
gettotheplayoffs,
wheretheycontinue
to
compete
withoneanother
fortheStanley
Cup. • Also,it neverhurtsto knowa fewfacts
aboutSidney
Crosby.
• Therearethreeperiods
to a gameand
thebreaksbetweenthemarejustcalled
breaks,nothalftime.
Neverreferto these
breaksas halftime.
• Evenif you'reskeptical,
venture
outtoa
hockey
gameanyway.
Often,mini-doughnuts
andbeerareinvolved.
• A hattrickiswhena playerscores
three
goalsinonegame.It'sa bigdeal.
• If you'regoingtowatchyourcutedykeplay
hockey,
remember
todresswarmly,
cheer
loudly
andneversmellhergloves.
• Nevercallortextmessage
yourhockey
PLAYING
THEFIELD
used hockey equipment?"
Players generally pay a seasonal fee for
ice time, which, depending on where you
live, can also be steep. Some teams compete,
which can mean incurring traveling costs,
whereas others, who play mostly for fun, use
all their rink time for games.
Ice hockey has a reputation for being
aggressive and violent. Like many professional sports, it is considered a man's game, but
many women who grow up in figure skating
have spent years ogling their brothers' knee~
pads and hockey sticks. Rachel Young, who
has played for a team called the Slamazons
in Vancouver, British Columbia, for a year,
thinks socialization is key.
"My parents wanted me to take ballet;' she
laughs. Now, ice hockey is one of her favorite
pastimes. Interestingly, many of the women on her team share her story of finding
hockey later on in life. The Slamazons boast
z0 that they have had teammates ranging in age
from 18 to 50, yet none of them were raised
0
a:
<(
I
in the sport. Now their diversity, along with
(.)
t;. their community spirit, fosters an inclusive
zUJ
0
environment in which they reclaim the game
zUJ
I
they wanted to play as kids.
(.)
"Of course, hockey can be aggressive;'
UJ
a:
Young
says, "But it doesn't have to be:' The
::i
::s NHL famously encourages aggression even
u.i
Cl
though the reprimands for it can be tough.
cE
(/)
People seem to want to see professional hock:i:
1tef ey players get black eyes from fistfights or
z
::i
g take a puck in the mouth and lose some teeth.
Maybe that is why they are paid the salaries
UJ
z
that could keep an entire village of lesbians
I
::i
thriving. The truth is that the aggression in
CD
z
ice
hockey depends on the players. On recc3
reational teams like the Slamazons, winning
:,,:
(.)
isn't everything. The women want to have fun
0
and improve their skills. And more competi<(
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tive recreational teams will rarely tolerate the
kinds of violence seen in the NHL. Most
0..
queer women simply don't have that kind of
0..
<(
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(.)
health insurance.
z
0
Across the nation during playoff season,
a:
u.i
countless dykes belly up to countless bars
Cl
cE
UJ
to cheer on their favorite teams and hang
ten
with
their friends. Watching the game with
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0
The Way of the Puck continued on page 63
As a seniorassociateathleticdirectorand
a senioradministrator,NonaRichardsonis
secondin chargeandthe highest-ranking
femalein the athleticdepartmentat the
Universityof California,Davis.Sheoversees
five men'sandwomen'ssportsprograms,
strengthandconditioning,sportsmedicine
andstudent-athletesupportservices(complianceandacademicservices).Sheis also
an out lesbian.
As a new hirefrom the Midwestjust
overa yearago,the attractive,48-year-old,
unmarriedwomanknewthe questionswere
coming,so shedidn't hesitateto informthe
universitythat her partner,Terri,would be
comingwith her whenshe madethe move
out West."It is funny howtime, age,relationshipsand locationaffect your mindset,"
Richardsonsays."I spentthe previous30
yearsnot addressingmy sexualityto others
within the profession,with the exception
of thoseI alreadyhada commonalitywith.
Makingthe movefrom the Midwestto the
WestCoast,wherethe imageis acceptance,
seemedto makethe timing right.Addressing
it up front is easierthan denial,or [facing]
morequestions."
But it wasn't alwaysthat simplefor
Richardson.
Whenshewas a star volleyball
playerat MichiganStateUniversityin the
early 1980s,Richardsonlived in an environmentwherepeoplerarelycameout, except
to eachother.Whenshewas a volleyball
coachat Kentucky,Valparaiso(Indiana)and
EasternMichiganuniversities,the fact that
shewas a lesbianmayhavebeencommon
knowledgeamongthe networkof coaches
and administratorswho were gay,but it
was not talkedaboutor givenup freelyto
employers.
"If you are singleandolderthan 30,
you hearthe talk andseethe looks,"says
Richardson.
Theoptions,she says,are to
"standup, moveon or file suit."
Richardsongrew up in the projectsin
Albany,N.Y.,the middlechild of a single
mother.Thefamily receivedwelfare-issued
blockcheese,rice and powderedmilk. Her
exceptionalathleticability was a catalystfor
opportunity."Vollyball,a virtual anomalyto
me growingup,hasprovento be my savior."
In thosedays,mostAfricanAmericankids
were steeredtowardbasketballor track.
But Richardsonwas a biggerthreat playing
volleyball."At MichiganState,I was the only
AfricanAmericanon the JVteam,"shesays.
Sheand anotherAfricanAmericanmadevarsity as sophomores,
then shewas the lone
AfricanAmericanduringher last two years.
"Overall,I felt that I was supportedfrom
teammates,the coachingstaff,administrators andalumni,"shesays.Shewas named
MVPandchosenas co-captainat Michigan
State,but evenmoreimportantly,shewas
the first from her generation,in her immediate family,to attendcollegeand graduate.
Whileathleteswere moreclosetedthen,
"you still havecoacheswho will recruit
negativelyagainstindividualswho are
perceivedas gay,"saysRichardson."It is
gettingbetter,but thereare still barriersto
cross."
Transitioningfrom beinga student-athlete
to a careeradministrator,Richardsonwent
from beingarounda close-knitgroupof
femaleathletesto workingwith administrators who,shesays,are predominantlywhite
andheterosexual,
andoverwhelminglymale.
"Youhearhowthey talk, you see howthey
act, you knowwhoseworld you are in," she
says."Youhaveto pick your battlesand
knowwhento showyour hand,whenit
doesn'tmatter."
Movingto the WestCoast,she admits,
madeit seemeasierto be an out lesbian.
"It is eitherthe olderI've gotten,the less I
concernmyselfwith who knows,or I feel
that the WestCoastis a little moreaccepting,"shesays."I havegivena little in both
directions.I will admitthat conservatism
andtraditionalvaluesrun rampantin the
Midwest."
So howcan a lesbianstudent-athlete
knowwhichschoolsarethe mostaccepting?"Collegesacrossthe countryadvertise
that they are a diverseinstitutionand invite
a diverseapplicationpool,"saysRichardson.
"Thisdoesnot necessarilymeanthat they
are gay-friendly,but I think the morediverse
individualsthey haveamongthem,the more
they realizethe differencesare minute.
"Gowith your passion,"she advises."Do
not sacrificewhat you haveput your heart
andsoul into,for what othersmaysayto
discourageor distractyou. If you do not fit in
at oneinstitution,thereare hundredsmore
out there."[LaurieK.Schenden]
May 2009
J
53
.,........_..._-HOT
ANDHEAVY
FITNESS-----·A workout that will have you workin' it like never before.
By Heather Robinson I Photography by Cheryl Mazak
Do you ever wish you could pay more attention to how
hot your partner is, instead of how exhausted you are-or
that cramp in your forearm or that ominous twinge in your
lower back? For many of us, sex is the most athletic activity
we regularly participate in, but we never train specifically
for the game of love.
The following workout was designed to improve your sex
life. Do it consistently and you will increase your strength,
endurance, flexibility and (most importantly) your confi-
dence. Improving your fitness will boost your energy level,
encourage you to try glamorous new positions, give you
more staying power in your old favorites and allow your
inner sex goddess to come out and play.
There is nothing sexier than feeling fit. Do this workout
two or three times a week and your body willbe ready for anything your dirty little mind can come up with. And remember,
the best sex workout of allis having sex, so get busy, ladies.
Whatyou'llneed:An exercise band and a yoga mat or an
exercise pad. Sexy music with a solid beat and nonrestrictive clothes will also be helpful.
Beginners:
Perform each movement for 15 to 30 seconds,
resting after completing one set of each exercise; that's one
circuit. Do the entire circuit two to three times. As you get
stronger add more time and shorten the rest periods. Cool
down with the flexibility routine.
More advanced:Perform each movement for 45 to 60
seconds (with the exception of pushups, do 10 to 20 of
these). Do the circuit two to four times with two to four
minutes of jumping rope, jogging in place or jumping
jacks in between. Cool down with the flexibility routine.
STRENGTH
CIRCUIT
Always warm up with five to 10 minutes of walking, jogging or other gently rhythmic movements-we're sure you
can think of something.
PUSH-UPS:
Oneof the bestmovementsfor developingupper
bodyandcorestrength,includingthe abilityto holdyourselfup,
which is a very handyskill to have,indeed.Keepyourbodyin a
straightline by clenchingyourbutt musclesand pullingin your
stomach,while keepingyour handsalignedwith yourshoulders.
Beginnersshouldstart from a table-topposition(kneesdown,
at a 90 degreeangleto yourbody);moveon to the modifiedand
then the advancedtoe position.
PLANKS:
Thisis a staticmovethat develops
stabilityandendurance
in yourbump-andgrind department.Cometo the top of your
push-upposition(armsextended)andhold,
onceagaintighteningyour butt andyour
stomach.Tryto get your bodyin a straight
line. Beginnersstart on bent kneesand
elbows,thosemoreadvancedcantry it on
handsandtoes.
54
Icurve
HeatherRobinsonis a certifiedstrengthandconditioningspecialist.Readherfitnessblogat www.workoutsf.com.
FLEXIBILITY
HIPTHRUSTS:
This is a reverseplankexecutedon your back.
Keepyour heelscloseto yourbodyandyourarmsrestingalong
side.Pushyour hips up as high as you can while squeezing
your butt and pushingthroughyour heels(this activatesyour
hamstrings).Holdat the top or pulseup anddown.If you're
advanced,try lifting and extendingoneleg at a time in the air.
BANDPRESSES
(notpictured):Anchoryour bandarounda
stationaryobjectlike a couchor heavytable leg. Graba handle
and get into the push-up,in the tabletop or kneelingposition.
With your palmfacingtowardyour bodypressforwardin a
punchingposition,makingsureto keepyourarm closeto your
bodyandyour neck in alignmentwith your spine.Repeaton
the otherside.
BOATBICEPCURLS:
Froma seatedpositionwith
an anchoredbandin eachhandengageyour
abdominalmuscleswhile leaningbackand lifting
yourfeet a few inchesoff the floor.Withyour
elbowspinnedto your sidescurl your handsup
towardyour shoulders,while keepingconstant
tensionin the band.
WRISTCURLS(shownstanding):Holdingboth
handlesin a seatedpositionlay yourforearms
alongthe tops of yourthighs,with yourwrists
hangingoveryour kneesandyour palmsup. Curl
the bandbacktowardyour body.Flipyour handsover(palms
down)and repeaton the other side.
We all know it's important to stretch, but hardly any
of us do. The problem is that without flexibility training, as we get older things start to tighten up and we
lose range of motion in our joints. This translates into
fewer options, and more chance of injury in the bedroom- and nobody wants that. Hold
each stretch for 30 to 60 seconds.
BABYSTRETCH
(notpictured):Lie on your belly
with your kneesbentas wide apartas you can and
your big toestouching.Thegoalit to openup your
hips and get your kneesand butt closerto the floor.
CAMEL:
Kneelon bothkneeswith the tops of your
feet on the groundandsupportyour lower back
with your handsas you leanback.Youwill feel a
stretchin your lower backand in the fronts of your
thighs.If you can,openup your chest,leanall the
way backand rest your handson your heels.If
your kneesare sensitive,you can do the back bend
from a standingposition.
CHESTOPENER:
Lie on
the floor with your hands
behindyou,slightly
wider than yourshouldersand lift your
hips,while keepingyour headaligned
with yourspine.Tomakethe stretch
easier,bendyour knees.
COBRA:
Lie on your
stomachwith your
elbowsbentandyour
handsin front of you. Gentlypressyour hips into
the ground,archyour backand look upward.As
you becomemoreflexible,beginto straightenyour
armsfor a moreintensestretch.
Showing us the ropes
are our sizzling models:
(above right) dancer
and personal trainer
Sarah Bush (www.
sarahbushdance.com)
and (left) bartender
and culinary student
Christina Cabrera
If youhaven'tdoneanyexercisein a whilecheckwith youdoctorbeforestartinganythingnew.
May 2009
I55
REVIEWSMusic Watch
Co-Ed Combos
Gals and guys mixing it up for results you'll like. Trust us. By Margaret Coble
I UsedtoLovher,
Shire(Hot
CityMusicGroup):
Shire
(pronounced:
she-ray),who
fansmayrecognize
as Chinky
in theshort-lived,
Sisq6producedgirl bandLovher,has
sincereinvented
herselfas
a soloartist-and a Sapphic
dabblingone,at that.A
powerhouse
voicethat'sequal
partsraspandhoneypropels
herdebutsingle,"I Usedto
Lovher,"
asShiredescribes
theall toofamiliarhighsand
lowsof thetoxicon-again,
off-againfirst girlfriend I usually tend to focus on female soloists or all-girl Dig That Treasurewith more dreamy yet downright
experience.
Andwitha hook bands, but every now and then you just have to shake
unconventional sounds. The lead-off"Tail & Main''
like:"Webrokeupandgot
things up. This month's female-fronted groups mix is an indie-pop ditty with rockabilly overtures, via
backagain,butnowI know
up the gender composition of their bands and the autoharp, jangly guitars and galloping snare drums.
this is the end.I believedin
musical genres in their sound.
"Blue Tears" is a somber but fun rave-up, while "The
her,wouldhavestuckwith
her,tattooedon mybelly-I
Loving Sun'' is a moody, mellow distortion-fest. With
will neverforgether,"it's
Fruit,The AsteroidsGalaxyTour{SmallGiants):The influences as diverse as Broadway show tunes, classihardnotto "lovher."If you're Asteroids Galaxy Tour's jangly feel-good anthem
cal music and psychedelic '60s and '70s film scores,
in the marketfor an R&B 'i\.round the Bend" is a perfect introduction to the sixthe sound is truly other worldly, but strangely accesbreakupanthemanddon't
piece female-fronted indie band from Copenhagen,
sible. (www.myspace.com/cryptacize)
feelparticularlyrepresented
Denmark.
The
rest
of
their
10-track
debut
is
equally
by Beyonce's
"Puta Ringon
psychedelic and danceable, merging pop sensibility Menagerie,
NousNon Plus (Aeronaut):
Even though
It," thenthis maybejust
the post-splitheartache- with classic soul stylings and trippy funk rock for the bulk of this 13-cut disc is in French, the twosoothingtuneyouneed. an infectious sound. Band founders Mette Lindberg gal, four-guy band is actually from New York City.
(www.myspace.com/ and Lars Iversen only started working together two The band is led by Celine Dijon, a vocalist of Swissshireuniversalj years ago, but with such high-profile placements German and Chinese descent who grew up in Paris.
[RachelShatto] as Apple commercials and TV shows like Gossip
The other band members hail from various American
Girl, the cat's already out of the bag. "The Sun Ain't cities. "Loli" is a gritty indie-dance-rock-meets-'60sShining No More;' with its sweeping strings, horn
French-pop-meets-The-Jam
body shaker, while
blasts and slinky basslines, is already a radio hit in "Catastrophe" goes a more bouncy, electronic '80s
the U.K. Nearly every track has hit potential here. French New Wave route. Several songs mix French
(www.theasteroidsgalaxytour.com)
with English, including the humorous crush-ode
"French Teacher;' and"Le Dandy;' with its airy tropicalMythomania,
Cryptacize
(Asthmatic
Kitty):With a simi- flavored pop. Most cuts fall in the glam-pop-punk
lar retro and cinematic vibe, but a more atmospheric
category, with detours into sleaze-disco-but they're en
z
art-rock direction, this female-led San Francisco Bay all infectious, sexy and fun. This one is not to be ffi
Area trio follows up its critically acclaimed debut
missed. (www.nousnonplus.com)
g
g
56
Icurve
Q+A
Smokin' Hot
Dolorata
Lea Delaria gives jazz hands new meaning.
Attention jazz fans and foes alike: There is still at least one groovy chick on
the scene and she's well worth giving jazz another listen. Lea DeLaria, the
butch of all trades, has served up yet another delightful performance on The
Live Smoke Sessions, her second album, with 12 new jazz renditions done
DeLaria-style. Early last fall, I headed to Smoke Jazz Club on the Upper West
Side of Manhattan, where the album was recorded, to enjoy a
smoky glass of wine and see DeLaria perform.
Most will probably recognize DeLaria from her in-your-face
stand-up comedy, her roles on television (most recently on
Law & Order: Special Victims Unit) and the big screen, and her
Broadway career. Clad in a pinstripe suit and wing-tip shoes,
she took the stage in front of a receptive audience she affectionately identified as "jazz club virgins" (um, was it that obvious?) and thanked us for coming out.
"It looks more like a gay night in Chelsea in here than a jazz
club," she joked. On the other side of this edgy comedian is
a lovely jazz diva who took control of the room with her sultry
voice. She can definitely belt out the notes, but I was impressed with her
soft, controlled performance in "You Don't Know What Love Is." It was the
perfect mix-strong, quiet and hypnotizing. My favorite song was her rockin'
version of "Miss Otis Regrets." It had a seductive beat that got my booty
moving in my chair. It was a song you could dance to in a club or, even better, naked in your living room. I'm definitely a convert. [BreeClarke]
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linestitch)
(if
Anjulie
Anjulie
(HearMusic)
Thisself-titleddebut
from the 26-year-old
MontrealR&Bsinger
showsgreatpromise.
The lead-offsingle,
"Boom,"hasa Nancy
Sinatraretrovibe
that's fun and booty
shaking,while others
on the 13-cut disc,
like "Rain,"go a more
urban-radio-friendly
R&Broute.A strong
debut.(www.my
space.comlanjulie)
TheLiving
andtheDead
JolieHolland
(Anti/Epitaph)
A foundingmemberof
the BeGoodTanyas,
theTexas-bred
Holland
offersupa soloalbum
filledwith hermesmerizinghybridof folk,
country,jazzandindie
rock."Palmyra,"
a
prayerfor the brokenhearted,and"Corrido
porBuddy,"abouta
friendwho'sfalleninto
addiction,areboth
achinglypoignant.
(www.jolieholland.com)
Whether they're opening for the Stooges at
San Francisco's iconic Warfield or commanding the stage at She Riffs, the five hard
rockin' women of Dolorata are dynamic
musicians. Lead singer and guitarist Katie
Colpitts took a break from planning the
tour for their album, Believer,to chat.
Whatis it likefor an all-femalebandin
SanFrancisco?
I think a lot of times you play shows and
people see all women and they expect
something-it's usually not us, for some
reason. A lot of times we get booked with
female events, you know, with other either
women-fronted or all-girl bands.
Wheredidyournamecomefrom?
Dolorata comes from the Madonna
Dolorata, which is Italian for the mother
of sorrows. My grandmother prayed to the
Dolorata that if she had a girl she would ...
pray to her every week for the rest of her
life. So she had a girl and she named her
Dolores. I remember as a little girl, every
Friday she would do her prayers. But I
didn't name [the band] for religious purposes. It has a lot more to do with the faith
and strength of a woman.
Whatareyourfavoritevenuesin San
Francisco?
Bottom of the Hill ... Red Devil Lounge ...
El Rio-that's a really great community
spot. We had the privilege and honor to
play the Fillmore and the Warfield. We
opened for Iggy Pop and the Stooges.
Our friends are in a band called Sistas' in
the Pit, they were on tour with him. At
Thursday's show ... they were like, "We
have this emergency situation and we're
not going to be able to play. Can we give
them your namer Would you be ready to
go Saturday nightt It was on Iggy's 60th
birthday. It was totally epic. [NinaLary]
REVIEWSIn the Stacks
ht New Possibilities
A historical novel and a tale that will go down in history. By Rachel Pepper
Spanning more than a century of history, from the
start of suffrage to the stirrings of the. transgender
reproductive rights movement, these books will open
your eyes to other ways of life.
The Sealed Letter, Emma Donoghue(Harcourt):
Donoghue, the author of several fine lesbian novels
including Slammerkin, continues her tradition of litWetlands,
CharlotteRoche
erary excellence with her new book, The Sealed Letter.
(Grove/
Atlantic):
Based on a real legal case that gripped England in
Roche'sdebutnovelhasal1864, The Sealed Letter explores the scandalous
readysoldover1 millioncopand very public divorce case of the unhappily wed,
ies,hasbeentranslatedinto
27 differentlanguages
andis
free-spirited Helen Codrington, who was ultimately
oneof the mostprovocative found guilty of infidelity. Divorce was still a rarity in
booksI'vereadin a very,very
those times, when women and children were regarded
longtime.In it, 18-year-old
as men's property, and the women's suffrage movement
bisexualHelenis hospitalized
was in its infancy. Besides being a legal tale, The Sealed
aftera shavingaccident,and
Letter
is also a story of the friendship and its betraywhiletheresheruminates
on
al-that
between Codrington and"Fido" Faithfull, an
herbodyandits exploitsin
graphicandunsettlingways. unmarried "woman of business" who runs a printing
Rochesaysshegotthe idea press in London. Despite Codrington's importance
whilesittingona friend's to the story, it is Fido who provides the moral center
toilet."I pickedupa tubeof
and the book's pivotal intrigue-she
is a lesbian in
soapandwasshockedto
a time where such things were not mentioned, and
discoverthatit wasdesigned
rarely acted upon. Drawn into her friend Helen's
cally male, Beatie transitioned from female to male in
specifically
for cleaningthe
web
of
lies
as
well
as
drawn
to
her
personally,
Fido
the mid-'90s, and has lived legally as a man ever since,
vagina.I beganto think,'My
God,am I theonlyperson must choose what path to follow-her conscience, or even marrying his female partner, Nancy. Having
leftwhodoesn'tusepussy her heart. As always, Donoghue gets all the period
chest surgery was a given for him, but unlike many
soap?'"Wetlandsis Roche's details right, through a combination of scruputrans men, Beatie chose to keep his female reproscatological
counterattack lous research and well-honed talents as a writer.
ductive organs, suspecting that he would one day
to ourultra-sanitized
world.
Donoghue's 1860s London is rendered so realistiwant to give birth to a child-especially
since his
Scandalous,
compelling
and
cally that readers can almost smell the polluted air, wife could no longer do so. After going off testosteraltogether
disturbing,
this is
a neweroticliteraryclassic. see the fog, hear the character's accents and feel the one, and restarting and regulating his menstrual cycle,
Beatie was able to conceive easily, although his first at(www.groveattantic.com)stirrings of a new political era in the wind. Generally
tempt ended in an ectopic pregnancy. After conceiving
[DianeAnderson-Minshall] intimidated by the thought of a 400 page historical
novel?
Not
to
worry.
The
Sealed
Letter
will
ease
you
again,
but feeling shunned by both the medical and
) Formorepicksfromother
shores,visitcurvemag.com.
in gently until you realize you're caught in its grasp,
the LGBT community (Beatie writes that his "biggest
only to be released in its final, surprising last pages. disappointment ... was the reaction of gay and lesbian
(www.emmadonoghue.com)
groups and the transgender c~mmunity"), Beatie, who
had been an obscure figure in the LGBT activist comLaborof Love,ThomasBeatie(SealPress): munity outside his native Hawaii, decided to go pubMany curve readers will remember
lic. After the small-town-Oregon resident pitched his
Thomas Beatie from the tabloids-where
story to the gay media, and it was subsequently picked
he was known as "the pregnant man:' His
up by the international press, Beatie found himself in
sudden appearance in magazines and on a firestorm of publicity, some of it very hateful. The
talk shows last year sparked heated conver- LGBT community has indeed had a hard time with
sation both within and outside the LGBT
Beatie, in particular because of his assertion that he
community. Although not born biologi- and Nancy were "private" people who nonetheless
58
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made themselves spokespeople, and also with
his claim to be the first pregnant trans man, an
untrue statement that he amends in his book
by saying he is the "first pregnant husband:'
So, then, what to make of this book, a detailed
autobiography of a less than exceptional life,
especially when Beatie was young, including
photos of his mother and accounts of family
pets? It's all a long pleasant prelude-sad family tragedies notwithstanding-to
the part of
the story most readers will be impatiently expecting, 10 chapters and close to 200 pages in.
The good news is that the book, co-authored
with a barely credited Alex Tresniowski, is
well-written, and therefore wading through
hundreds of pages of information that could
have been handled in one chapter is at least
enjoyable to read. Beatie comes across as compassionate, brave, loyal and loving, all good
traits in any parent-so those looking to fault
him will probably reconsider if they read his
story and gaze upon the sweet family photo
included. Now that Beatie has ridden the publicity bandwagon as far as it will go, Beatie's
story will at least serve as a noteworthy document of a time when the topic of trans reproductive rights was still new-and perhaps just
a little bit shocking. (www.sealpress.com)
ListenBetween
TheLines
Welive in an ageof multi-tasking-we
checkour emailwhilewaitingin line at
the bank,we cookdinnerwhilewatchingthe news,we weara Bluetoothso
we cantalk while we'reon the toilet. But
the latestmulti-taskingtrendis actually
sensible:SimplyAudiobookshasmadeit
possibleto "read" a bookanywhereyou
canlisten.Thinkof it as Netflixfor the
literaryset.Youordera title onlineand
a CDis sentto yourdoor.Whenyou're
finishedwith the book,sendit backto get
the nexttitle on yourlist or buyit for less
thantwo dollars.Youcansubscribefor up
to a yearof prepaidaudiolistening,which
meansthat youcanstart makingup for
thinkingthat Twilightwasjust a movie.
Mostrecently,they havesteppedintothe
downloadarena,offeringtheir libraryin
MP3form,allowingyouto take a digital
bookon the road.SimplyAudiobooks
alsoeliminatesthe wavy,water-logged
pagesthat comefrom readingwhile
takinga bath,sinceyoucankeepboth
handsfree in the tub with the latest
romanceright in yourstereo.It's a new
age.Books-they're like the newmusic.
[AinsleyDrew]
BLINDED
""' LIGHT
MORGAN
HUNT
Blindedby theLight
MorganHunt
(AlysonBooks)
Thethirdmystery
featuringTessCamillo,
an amateurdetective
whovisitsthe Lightning
Field,an art installation
and,aftera particularly
badthunderstorm,
finds
oneof hercabinmates
dead,but notfromthe
storm.Thestoryis
:::,
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told in the noirstyleof
a:
CD
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detective
Q.
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novels,
but
with a
w
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lesbiantwist andliberal
dosesof humor.(www.
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[Kathilsserman]
lntersex(ForLack
of a BetterWord)
TheaHillman
(ManicD Press)
It's utterlyimpossible
to notbespellbound
by performer-activist
TheaHillman,in person
or in print.In lntersex,
shedocuments
her
ownsearchfor self
andshowsthatqueer
culture'sobsession
with "samesex"or
"oppositesex"as categoriesis sometimes
a bit meaningless.
A
must-read.
(www.manicdpress.com
) [Diane
Anderson-Minshall]
BetweenTwoWomen
BandFags!
FrankAnthonyPolito PatriciaHarrelson
Press)
(Kensington
Books) (Outskirts
Thisbreezyfirst novel After33 yearsof marfollows"bandfag" Jack riageandthreegrown
children,theauthor
fromseventhgradeto
of this memoirfallsin
hisfreshmanyearof
college,as hisrelation- lovewitha womanbut
continues
to struggle
shipwith hisbest
After
friendBradblossoms withhersexuality.
andbuckles.Contains strikingupa friendship
with Carol,a 69-yearcheesylyricsand
olddyke,Patriciaoffers
soapoperadebacles
liketryingto convince to transcribeCarol's
seniorsyouknowwho oralherstory.Carol
givesPatriciaa context
theViolentFemmes
are.You'lllaugh.You'll for lovingandfills her
cry.You'llcringe.(www. with hope.(www.out[Kl]
kensingtonbooks.com)skirtspress.com)
[Andrea
Millar]
Q+A
Susan Gabriel
Susan Gabriel, the
author of Seeking Sara
Summers, delivers a
phenomenal story line
in her first adultfiction novel. In this
intimate story of selfdiscovery, when Sara
(Summers) Stanton, a
loving wife and mother
develops breast cancer, she realizes that
she's been living for everyone but herself
So she sets off on a trip to Italy to visit
Julia, her childhood best friend. To her
surprise, she finds herself falling in love
with Julia and starting down a path to
find a more meaningful life.
Whyisthewomanonthecoverheadless
andholding
anartichoke?
Because Sara is someone, like many of
us, who needs to get out of her head
and more into her heart. The artichoke
makes sense because it has an amazing
heart at the center of it, but there's all
those prickly petals that you have to get
through before you can get to the heart.
Sara's journey is getting to the heart of
who she really is as an authentic person.
DidyoufeellikeSara?Wereseekingyourselfwhileyouweremarried?
I definitely felt that I was on that search,
too. So many women know this. It's where
you just know instinctively that something is missing and somehow you have to
find whatever that missing piece is.
Howdoesbeinga formermarriageandfamilytherapistinfluence
yourwriting?
So many women who sat across from
me in the counseling office were at a
crossroads in their lives, which is where
Sara is in the book. I feel like I've not
only lived it firsthand, but witnessed it
from other women.
Howwouldyoudescribe
yourwritingstyle?
I start hearing voices in my head, like a
dialogue going on between the characters and that's how I know if something
is viable or not. I believe that stories
choose us instead of us choosing stories.
[LaKeisha
Hughes]
May 2009
I59
REVIEWSSapphic Screen
The MonsterWithout
Undone wrestlers and zombie savants grace the screen. By Candace Moore
TheEarlyWorksof Cheryl
Dunye(FirstRunFeature):
I am nothyperbolizing
when
I saythatfilmmakerCheryl
Inside
Dunye'sStranger
is oneof the mostunderratedlesbianfilmsof all time.
Wrenching
andriveting,it hit
all the rightmarkswithout
everbeingpreachy.
Those
whoknowDunyeexpect
nothingless,butthe director
herselfis a bit marginalized.
Criticsarequickto pigeonhole
her(thoughcomparisons
to
Lesbian couples are important characters in these
SpikeLee'searlyworkaren't
modern fables about masochistic wrestlers and
withoutmerit),andshe'soften gay zombies.
beenvilifiedbyconservatives
anddismissed
by mainstream
consumers.
ThisnewDVD The Wrestler(Fox SearchlightPictures):In Darren
Aronofsky's viscerally moving The Wrestler, Mickey
collectionis a reminderof
whyherworkis sofunny, Rourke rekindles his star as a "broken-down piece
provocative
andinventive, of meat" we can't take our eyes off 0£ Pumped up,
mixingnarrativewith docuarthritic, swollen, massive and humbled by age, Randy
mentaryin a waythat'sboth
"The Ram" Robinson is a wrestling hero way past his
illuminating
andamusing.
The
sell-by date. To afford pain meds and make the rent
six low-budget
films reflect
on his trailer, "The Ram" stays trapped in a world of
onthefirst chapterof Dunye's
body
slams and selfmutilation. When heart surgery
oeuvre,offeringupa time
opens
up his chest, creating another thick scar, Randy
capsuleon lesbianlife in the
'90s-from datingandvanilla makes changes. He gives up gigs and reconnects with
sexto politicalpotlucks the daughter he abandoned to glory measured in
andracialconstructs. autographs, heavy metal, strip joints and cocaine.
[DianeAnderson-Minshall] Evan Rachel Wood (Thirteen) plays Randy's adult
daughter Stephanie-at
turns wounded, suspicious
and reasonably furious-she's a mess of psychic damage that trumps Randy's physical pain. Whether or
not Rourke and Wood had that Lolita-like romance
on the set, a near-incestuous chemistry charges
the relationship between their ravaged characters
on-screen. Stephanie's live-in girlfriend answers the
door when Randy comes around, judging his intentions and protectively filtering Randy's access to her
lover. Stephanie's lesbian relationship is just another
60 I curve
Q+A
Shamim Sarif
and Hanan Kattan
Screenwriter and director Shamim Sarif and
producer Hanan Kattan are the lesbian fi.lmmaking power-couple responsible for the two recent
cinema gems I Can't Think Straight and The World
Unseen. After 15 years together, the two certainly
know how to play to each other's strengths. Not
only did Sarif write both scripts and the corresponding novels, she wrote two of the songs for
I Can't Think Straight and the couple has even
established a record label, Enlightenment Records,
to produce the soundtracks for both films. And
that's not the last we'll be seeing of this duo. There
is talk of a potential TV spin-off for I Can't Think
Straight, and they're working on two other film
adaptations. "You can't stand still too long with
Hanan around;' jokes Sari£ Indeed.
I Can'tThinkStraightissetin present-day
London
andTheWorldUnseen
is setin SouthAfricaduring
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piece of the film's mise-en-scene; her sexuality is not treated as a
defining feature of her character. As a whole, the film lacks exposition. We are simply flung into its world. A tour de force, The
Wrestler deserves the kudos it has won. (wwwfoxsearchlight.com)
Otto;or,Up WithDeadPeople(StrandReleasing):
Bruce LaBruce
polishes his playful, nee-Marxist, punk-boy porn to its finest
sheen with Otto. His first zombie-themed art house feature is
a visual and auditory wonder (set to an inspired soundtrack
out on Crippled Dick Hot Wax! Records). Otto (Jey Crisfar)
is a young gay zombie who stumbles seizure-like around Berlin,
his green-white eyes awash with light, scooping up roadkill to
munch on. Otto's demeanor aptly reflects LaBruce's metaphor
for the way sensitive types feel under capitalism. He tries to recollect the love he had while he was alive. Answering a casting call
found on a flyer, he crosses paths with the radical film maven
Medea Yarn (Katharina Klewinghaus), who thinks he has real
undead potential and gives him a major role in her movie (within LaBruce's movie). Medea's low-budget Up With Dead People
imagines a gay zombie uprising featuring anatomically absurd
sex and led by the Che Guevara of the living dead. LaBruce
mixes grainy black-and-white footage with rich vibrant color,
representing Medea's girlfriend Hella Bent (The Raspberry Reich's
Susanne Sachsse) as a silent film belle who utters endearments
through inter-tides and picnics with her honey across celluloid
divides. Otto's adventures as king of the landfills, reluctant film
star and would-be martyr are inflected with an existential ennui
fascinating to behold through LaBruce's lens. Occasionally, a
stunning rainbow ironically appears behind our beloved zombie
prince. (www.strangreleasing.com)
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apartheid.
Howdoes
placefit intotheframeworkof yourfilms?
Sarif:I think the sense
of place is highly
important in films
because even though
they talk about personal integrity and,
you know, figuring
out who you are and these types of things ...
I always like to have a bigger backdrop that
sometimes reflects some of that journey.
Somecriticsobjected
to theculturalstereotypesofthefamiliesin I Can'tThinkStraight.
Whatdoyouthinkofthecriticism?
Kattan:To be honest, what Shamim wrote
in I Can't Think Straight is loosely based
on [our] relationship and our familieshow they reacted, what we went through.
Actually, if anything, Shamim toned it
down and not up, because she thought
people would think it was too exaggerated.
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TheGreatest
Silence TheSecrets
Video)
(Women
MakeMovies) (Monterey
Straight/aced
(GroundSpark)
Thispowerful
Reelingfromhermothdocumentary
by Lisa
er's recentsuicideand
F.Jacksontellsthe
chafingat the bit over
storyof five Congolese herorthodoxJewish
rapesurvivors.
The
background,
the brainy
film takesthe viewer Naomiavoidsmarriage
intothe currentcivil
by goingto studyat
warandhowit creates a women'sseminary
an environment
that
in Sated,Israel.While
putswomenat risk
there,shemeetsthe
andexploreshowrape beautifulMichelleand
is usedas weapon.
thetwo startbreaking
Theacclaimed
film
rules-religious,culwasthe winnerof
tural,institutional-left
andright.A thoughtful,
the SpecialJury
Prize:Documentary hopefulfilm, backedby
at the Sundance
Film a rollickingsoundtrack
Festival.(www.theof Jewishfolk music.
greatestsilence.
org)
(www.thesecretsmovie.com)
[KatiePeoples]
[RachelBeebe]
Aneducational
documentarythatchallengesgenderstereotypes
andhomophobia
by
askinga diversegroup
of highschoolstudents
to talkaboutgender
expectations
andhow
theyinfluence
almost
everyaspectof their
lives-from howthey
dressto howtheyact
andwhothey'refriends
with.Thisis anhonest,
eye-opening
filmthat
coversa hugerangeof
issuesandis sureto be
invaluable
to educators
andparentsalike.
(www.groundspark.org/
straight/aced)
[RB]
You'vecastLisaRayandSheetalShethin two
moviesnow.Howdidyouattractthemto the
roles?
Sarif:We did a two-for-one deal. [Laughs]
The process began with I Can't Think
Straight, and I wasn't looking for looking for
Sheetal or Lisa for those roles, initially. In
both cases I found a few actresses ... [but]
when it came down to it they didn't want to
do the love scenes. What I like about both
[Sheetal or Lisa] is when we had conversations about the movie it was always about
the love story, the arc, the motivations of the
character. And I don't remember either one
of them ever mentioning that it was a love
story between two women.
I Can'tThinkStraight
is a romantic
comedy
thatdabblesin themorehard-hitting
topicof
politics.
Doyouthinkyoustrucka balance?
Sarif:Well, I hope so, because I think they
feed into each other in that the cultural
background for Tala is a big stumbling block
in coming to terms with her sexuality. But
I hope it adds another layer to the film, the
politics. So we wanted to kind of bring all of
that in and give it that richness, that cultural
authenticity, if you like. But yes, at its core
it's a love story.
Kattan:But I think also ... Palestinians are
usually portrayed as the terrorists or in
refugee camps. You rarely see the more
educated or affluent or well-traveled, wellversed Palestinians, so she wanted to explore
that as well as the Indian community, which
probably has been explored a bit more in
films and books.
Havetheeventsofthelastseveralmonths
madeyouguysthinkdifferently
aboutincludingthedialogue
abouttheIsraeli-Palestinian
conflictin I Can'tThinkStraighf/
Sarif:No. If anything, I feel even more
strongly that these things need to be out
there and discussed and a dialogue needs to
be opened. Because I think as we can see,
that dialogue is something that is very missing at the moment. [RachelBeebe]
Cl)
May 2009
J
61
REVIEWSTech Girl
Stick Textin Situations
And how to get out of them. By Jenny Lovell
In a wireless society, every lezzie has to keep up and texting is easily accessible. But the
written word can often be mistaken. Text messages lack intonation, emotion and other
indicators that can clarify verbal communication. Here are a few sticky situations to avoid.
Friendship Fumble
Fumble:
You'rein a rushandaccidentally
textyourbest
butchbuddysomething
dirty,insteadof the girl youmet
lastnight.Insteadof callingyououtonyourfumble,she
writesyoubacka flirtatiousquip.
PHONESWAG
Addsomestyleto yourlifeline
by replacingyourcell phone's
backcoverwith a fashionforwardCoveroo.
Choose
an etchedfairydesignand
releaseyourinnerpixie,or
optfor anotherof the 250
designs.Betteryet,youcan
gothe extramileandsubmit
yourownoriginalidea,transformingyourgenericsmart
phoneintoa personalized
conversation
piece.Maybe
that cutegirl you'vebeen
eyeingupwill notice-hey,
it's a greatsegueintoasking
for herphonenumber.
($20,coveroo.com)
[Kimberly
Bale]
Solution:
Nobody
wantsto becorneredunexpectedly
while
a friendexplainsherunrequited
love.Thebetterchoice?
Nipit in thebud.Texta jovialresponse
playingup her
senseof humor.
Tellhershe'shilariousandyou'llseeher
for thegameonSunday.
Office Space-Out
Fumble:
It'sfiveo'clockandasyou'rerunningout
the dooryouremember
youneedto answerthe last
condescending
questionyourbosstextedyou.You
pickupyourphoneandfind histextalreadyonthe
screen.Youcheckyourtextlogandrealizethatthe
litanyof disgustabouthimthatyouthoughtyousent
to yourloyalcoffeebreakbuddyactuallywentto the
onemanwhoshouldneverhavereadit: yourboss.
Solution:
If youfind yourselfin a stickyslip-up,the
bestpolicyis an honestapologyanda frankconversation.
If youavoidmentioning
yourmisdirected
text,youcouldfacemonthsof missedopportunities
andawkwardencounters
at thewatercooler,or even
loseyourjob.A bluntrebuttalwill let youknowwhere
youstandandhopefullyclearupsomeof yourboss's
misconceptions
aboutyourqualifications.
Sweet.The onlythingthat can take my mindoff my
amazinglyincompetentbossis a hot girlthat mixes
caffeinatedbeverages.I swearhe thinksI didn't
graduatehighschool.I'm morequalifiedthan he is!
More Than Words
Fumble:
You'recomingupon ninemonthswithyourgirlfriend
andthe honeymoon
periodis wearingoff.Allyoucanthinkof is
howshesqueezes
thetoothpaste
fromthe middleof thetube
andhogsthe covers.Youanswerherlatestaffectionate
text
witha clippedresponse.
It doesn'toccurto youthatsucha flat
answercouldspelldisasterfor a buddingrelationship.
Solution:
Whenemotionsareonthe line,textingtoo littlecan
a:
leadto confusion
andmisunderstandings.
Don'tplayemotional ::5
5
tug-of-warto getyourway.Withtwo girls,thetendencyto
sidesteptouchysubjectsis high.Someone
hasto womanup
w
<{
andtacklethe issuehonestly.
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62
Icurve
The Best of Bali continued from page 4 7
settled for tempeh with peanut sauce. Since
most Balinese people are Hindu and don't
eat meat, I had the satisfaction of eating like
the locals. My veggie meals were not only traditional but also occasionally great, especially
those including pineapple.
While I was having my blond hair braided into tiny cornrows, I was lulled by the
conversation of the women whose gentle
hands were working on my head. Braiding
takes place on the beach, in the markets,
anywhere you want it done, and costs only
about $20 a head. Bali Moon Group took us
for a gentle, two-and-a-half-hour ride-all
downhill-from
a volcano crater. We passed
through villages, ashrams and temples, and
dozens of small, sweet children ran up to call
"Hello! Hello!" At the end of a long day out,
it was nice, cheap and convenient to hop on
a bemo-a tiny bus fitted with elf-size seats.
Rides cost only pennies a mile.
The high point in our search for the real
Bali was Waka Shorea, an eco-lodge that is
the only place to stay in West Bali National
Park. At this fantastic resort ( really a cross
between a Four Seasons and a Girl Scout
camp) there are no cars or roads, so we
had to take a 15-minute boat ride across
picture-perfect turquoise water to reach it
and, after settling into our tree-level room,
we ran straight to the beach to go snorkeling. Underwater we saw blue starfish,
lavender coral and dozens of birdlike tropical fish, while on land we were visited by
troops of long-tailed black monkeys and
an egually stunning wild pig. A mongoose
hung out in the tree near our dinner table,
we trailed a dog-size "mouse deer" on the
beach and I took a jungle trek at dawn with
a park ranger who showed me gigantic blue
butterflies and secretive land crabs. He explained the history of the limestone cliffs,
showed me the tracks of wild animals and
took me to a beach that is off-limits to the
public and houses a breeding program for
Balinese starlings. These tiny white-andblack birds were nearly extinct in the 1980s,
but now their numbers are growing. In a
huge aviary, the little birds were practicing
singing and flying, getting ready to join their
relatives in the jungle nearby. Despite being
bred in captivity, they were clearly ready for
life in the jungles of Bali-and
so was I. I
never wanted to leave the national park and
iil
Waka Shorea-the
part of Bali that's both
z
i3 utterly authentic and very, very nice.
The Way of the Puck continued from page 53
friends is a large part of hockey dyke culture.
It's a bonding activity. Some people place
bets and join hockey pools, others partake in
"playoff pie" (a casserole of layers of potato,
onion and cheese wrapped up in bacon) with
friends over for some super-loud TV time
and beer. Some get so loud, their neighbors
call the cops.
If you are not a hockey dyke but you find
yourself involved with someone who is, and if
you're feeling particularly lonely during playoff season, you might be what is affectionately referred to as a playoff widow. Many of
us have been there. We do our best to sport
a new skirt or fragrance, but try as we might,
we can't seem to compete with the closest
thing there is to a butch soap opera. A wellseasoned hockey dyke can spend hours, days
or even weeks discussing the subject with
her friends. Gossip will go around about
,
pare(
untq
Fertility and life is the rose. the sublime blossom.
the womb from which all enter the world.
Emu, ace yuu1 111a4uifice11t
feminine self.
E~i/,;a1~!1y.
www.feminineprinciples.com
players, coaches and team owners. Hockey
dykes who are into it are really into it. Those
who aren't will find themselves at a loss while
hockey dykes discuss the finer workings of
player trades and coaches and managers who
are moving around.
Is there a possibility that we will see women's hockey turn professional in the future?
The Slamazons think so. As we raise up future generations of hockey players, lesbians
and straight women everywhere might be
encouraged to put on their skates and try to
score their first hat trick before puberty. If
they're anything like Steph Naylor, they will
"play hockey to win and to feel alive:'
May 2009
I63
TOPTENREASONS
WELOVE
...
Keba Drew
This multitalented artist is making queer women of color more visible. By Katie Peoples
Justice/Just Us and Poets Against Rape in
support of rape victims.
2. Shecandance.As a member of the troupes
Mambo Queens and Sisters of Substance,
Drew has shaken her thang in cities like
London, New York and San Francisco, including a performance at In Bed with Fairy Butch.
And she's won the Irene Weed Dance Award
and a Robert Kuykendall Dance Scholarship.
3. She'san activist.As a second-generation
dissenter, Drew has a background in protesting, rallying and fighting for what's right.
Her parents were civil rights activists and,
like Drew, they used their creative talents to
support protest lines and spread the message
in schools.
4. She brings people together.Through
QWOCMAP's film festival, Drew gathers
people from all sides of the LGBT community under one roo£ And gets them talking.
'i\.11these different groups of people end up
mixing," she says. "It's like, 'Oh that's your
story, OK. And that's your community, OK:
And it's such a mixed crowd that it ends up
feeling really amazing:'
Kebo Drew, a queer activist and awardwinning poet, has spent her career covering the
topic of the African diaspora to the Americas.
Her work has given her a unique perspective
on women of color in the queer community
and her activism has led her to become the
festival manager of San Francisco's Queer
Women of Color Media Arts Project.
Through QWOCMAP,
Drew has given
many underrepresented women a place to
have their voices heard. We can't get enough
of her, and here's why.
1. She'sa poet.Andwe knowit. Drew has performed her poetry in Europe and the United
States. She is a Cave Canem Poetry Fellow,
has won the Audre Lorde/Pat Parker Award
and che Astraea Emerging Lesbian Writers
Award, and has performed at venues like
64
Icurve
5. She'sreadyto feedthemediamasses.
After
years of hanging on to Set It Off with Queen
Latifah, Drew says the community is hungry for new images of women of color, and
QWOCMAP
is ready to deliver. "When
we did the Corona Color Film Festival,
because it was focused on queer black women, queer women of African descent, you
would not believe the response," she says.
"People were so hungry, so, so hungry for the
images, because ... the ones that are out there
are not that positive. We're just, like, picking
anything that we can take. But then, every so
often ... these films will come out and people
are so hungry:'
6. She'sa historybuff.Drew's work on the
African diaspora not only spans African
American history, but includes the his-
cory of South America and the treatment of
European immigrants in the United States,
which gives her a perspective on how all these
things are interconnected. "Part of the work
I do is like, 'Well we know that we're divided
from each other, how do we find some more
common cause and really tell the truth about
what is our history?'" she says.
7. Shethinksqueerwomenof colorare more
thanjust "queer.""There's this tendency to
want to think that people lead single-issue or
single-identity lives, and we don't;' she says.
"Especially for queer folks of color-we're
not just concerned about our sexuality, our
sexual orientation and gender identity. We're
also concerned about class issues [and] how
the rest of our community is doing:'
8. She'sovercome
barriers.To get to where
she is today, Drew has dealt with institutionalized racism and shattered assumptions. In
turn, Drew and QWOCMAP have worked
to help people overcome the barriers of race,
class, ethnicity and immigration status.
"We're trying to remove as many barriers as
possible;' she says. 'i\.nd it might not be personal for every one of them, but it's certainly
still an issue for a lot of our communitie;:•
9. Queerness
runsin her family,so to speak.
'Tm actually a third-generation queer," she
says. "I have several cousins and extended
family, and then in my mom's generation and
then also my grandmother's generation. So,
I've actually heard stories from those generations about how it was to be queer and that
history and everything else:'
10. She'screatingvisibilityfor queerwomen
of colorin the LGBTcommunity.
As the festival manager of QWOCMAP, Drew thinks
it's important for queer women of color to
be seen and heard. "I think that sometimes,
within a larger LGBT context, people of
color are a little [bit of an] afterthought...
we're like the colored sprinkles on the white
cupcake;' she says.
2
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