-
Description
-
ToC Cover: The Supermodel is Back, Baby! With Jenny Shimizu by Lauren Marie Fleming (p24); 150 Most Desirable Queer Women (p26); Annette Bening Goes Gay by Kristin A. Smith (p30); Derby Grrls by Lisa Gunther (p50); A Lesbian tour of Las Vegas by Lauren Marie Fleming (p32); Not Just for Spring Break by Diane Anderson-Minshall (p34); Riding the Rails: Love Stories by Lauren Marie Fleming and Jennifer Parello (p36); Great Weekend Getaways by Fay Jacobs and Mary McGrath (p37); Hot Homo-friendly Hotels by Staff (p40); Travel Issue; Cover Photo by Jenny Risher.
See all items with this value
-
issue
-
7
-
Date Issued
-
September 2010
-
Format
-
PDF/A
-
Publisher
-
Frances Stevens
-
Identifier
-
Curve_Vol20_No7_September-2010_0CR_PDFa.pdf
-
extracted text
-
7
25274 80539 6
CAMPVEGAS'"
BRID6ESTORE
Sure, it's just a tire.
Like the Grand Canyon is just a big crack.
•
••
Up
GIT
los100
\IALUE
Vt\
BACK*
on anAmericanExpress®
brandedprepaidrewardcardby mail
whenyoubuya set of four eligibletBridgestoneDuelertires.
OffervalidSept.2throughOct.2, 2010.Forthe nearestBridgestoneretailer,call 1-877-TIRE
USA. •
*Reward
Card
canbeused
virtual~
anyM',efe
American
Express9
Cards
arewelcome
intheU.S.
asdetailed
atwww.rewardearrer.com/oodgestone;
valid
forupto6months;
card
isixiint-based
andnotredeemable
forcash.
Card
issued
inthename
submitted
onofficial
claim
form;
cannot
beissued
tominors;
nottransferrable.
Usage
restrictions,
guidelines,
terms
andconditions
apply.
Card
issued
bylnteliSpend
Prepaid
Solutions,
LLC.
ffiresmust
bepurchased
from
aparticipating
Bridgestone
retailer's
inventory
between
Sept2andOct.
2,2010.
Mail-in
claim
form
required.
Certain
restrictions
andlimitations
apply.
See
your
participating
Bridgestone
retailer
forcomplete
details.
Offer
excludes
Costco
purchases.
Fordriverswho want to get the mostout of theircars,
IT'SBRIDGESTONE
ORNOTHING.
ll::.III.IIE=ILIE=l!I.II~
bridgestonetire.comtiresafety.com
PASSION
for EXCELLENCE
Features SEPTEMBER
2010
24
The Supermodel is Back, Baby!
Jenny Shimizu has come a long way since
her runway days and famous dalliances.
We catch up with the queer icon 14 years
after she last graced our cover. By Lauren
Marie Fleming
26
150 Most Desirable Queer Women
The votes are in! Daniela Sea and Portia di
Rossi are on it. Are your other favorites? Find
out which sexy ladies made the cut.
30
Annette Bening Goes Gay
The actor talks about what it's like to play
house with Julianne Moore in The Kids Are
All Right. Plus, we chat with director Lisa
Cholodenko. By Kristin A. Smith
50
Derby Grrls
We hit the rink.with some of the real life.
Whip It girls. By Lisa Gunther
32
25 Placesto FindYourself
A Lesbian Tour of Las Vegas
Fun in America's lesbian playground.
By Lauren Marie Fleming
34
Not Just For Spring Break
Lesbian Olympics, snorkeling and pool
parties-a lesbian vacation in Cancun,
Mexico. By Diane Anderson-Minshall
36
Riding the rails: Love Stories
Train trips across the U.S., Canada and
Europe. By Victoria A. Brownworth, Lauren
Marie Fleming and Jennifer Pare/lo
37
Great Weekend Getaways
Fun short trips from Rehoboth Beach to
a tour of gay L.A. By Fay Jacobs and
Mary McGrath
~
~
a:
w
I
40
(/)
Hot Homo-friendly Hotels
a:
Five gay-friendly hotels you'll love. Plus,
why you should play the slots at this LGBTinclusive casino. By Staff
~
>z
z
6
£2.
~
::,
0
CD
<{
CJ
z
~
>(/)
<ii
~
zw
~
w
t:i
z
~
w
::i
(/)
w
...J
21
curve
g
Impressionism is the second most injluential movement this paintin9 was part of
A TOLERANT WORLD IS A WORK IN PROGRESS. But we're getting there. At Progressive,we/
believe in respecting all people and finding beauty in their differences. It's just one way we live
up to our name. To learn more about our Works in Progressinitiative, visit progressive.com/lgbt.
ProgressiveCasualty Ins Co and its affiliates, Mayfield Village, OH. 10D00056 (06/10)
PROGR£JI/V£
Departments SEPTEMBER
2010
Jl
•
•
IN EVERY ISSUE
18
6
Relationships: Loving long distance.
What to do when your heart spans borders.
Frankly Speaking
19
Money: Stop fighting about money. Six
8
9
Letters
10
16
60
62
64
expert tips for financial intimacy.
::,
LL.
Contributors, Scene
This is What a Lesbian Looks Like
(/)
20
AstroGrrl
22
Top Ten Reasons We Love ...
-
Curvatures
Lady Sovereign officially joins our
team! Kate Moss and Courtney
Love? Plus, who cares about the
Kagan rumors?
54
56
58
-
-
t:i:
~
fz
0
Politics
(/)
~
Why teaching is a powerful activist tool.
Out in Front
Celebrity Gossip
<{
I
Dyke Drama
Separate but unequal. Give us our wedding
stress, difficult divorces and rights already!
Lipstick & Dipstick
Shoes and ties- new dyketastic
accessories for the fall. Why kids
of lesbians do better, and Queen
Latifah's at the center of gaydar.
14
~
(/)
(/)
0
52
12
@'
~
.
•
-
Music: Back to our roots (music) with the
still fabulous Cyndi Lauper, Norwegian stars
Katzenjammer and Nola-infused Sabrina
Chap. Plus, Patty Larkin's new album.
Books: Pam Grier's new Foxy memoir
()
~
...J
LU
z
<t
0
~
(/)
LU
[::!
z
<t
I
<t
r
a.
0
(/)
and Streb's lessons on becoming an action
hero. Plus, the Moregasmgirls.
c5
Film: Sexy lesbo noir TheOwlsand making
Cl
babies without men. Plus, our fave toon Daria
is back. And a Q&A with director Alison Reid.
LU
LU
Tech: How gay-friendly is your cell phone
company? Also, 10 terrific lesbian Tweeters.
Ii:
LU
...J
z
~
«f
a:
LU
~~
z
<t
0
a:
Q
4
Icurve
Valeria
Solarino, the
heteroflexible ~
queen of new
Italian Cinema
The Newest Italian Lesbian Film
....J
:i:
c..
::j
Valeria Solarino talks to us about her new Italian lesbian film,
Sea Purple. In it, Solarino plays a young woman growing up in
Sicily during the 19th century and dealing with her sexuality.
~.
~~~~LJJ
b
~
LJJ
~
Ten Powerful Queers Under 21
~
~
0
~
Cl)
<t
Cl
a:
Q.
LJJ
~
Across the country, youth activists are leading the fight toward
LGBT equality. From Constance McMillen's very public prom
battle to the leaders of local chapters of the Gay Straight
Alliances, young people are helping to create a more equitable
and just world. Here are ten youth who are making a difference.
~
a:
0
~z
::::>
ID
a:
0
(!)
a:
Orgasmic Pregnancy
Authors Danielle Cavallucci and Yvonne K. Fulbright of Your
Orgasmic Pregnancy: Little Secrets Every Hot Mama Should
Know offer up five tips on how to keep your oven hot, even
when there's a bun in it.
LJJ
0
~
<t
6
z
a:
:5
(/)
a:
LJJ
(!)
Caster Semenya may be getting a bum deal, as critics debate
her "female-hood."Alison Steinberg tackles the gender issue.
Stunt Woman Turned Filmmaker Alison Reid
There are only so many ways we can say hot.
a:
z
<t
6
[ij
~
z
LJJ
t::!
....J
ii:
LJJ
~
Gender in Mainstream Professional Sports
0
0
Caster
Semenya
and the role
of gender in
sports
Ghost Hunting at the Mission Inn Hotel
One lesbian's paranormal tale from the Riverside, Calif. hotel
(and the catacombs beneath it), where the Nixons married and
Reagons honeymooned.
Who can say no to
Jenny Shimizu? We
couldn't, but alas, if
anyone could make us
think twice, it'd be sexy
Brooklyn singer Fiona
Silver. Who's your fave?
Email letters@curvemag.com.
COVERSMACKDOWN
:c
(.)
September 2010
I5
FRANKLY
SPEAKING
Step Intothe HonestyBox
We've just spent the last six months surveying
lesbians (ages 16 to 86) of all cultural, political
and spiritual backgrounds, from large metros to
small towns across the country. The one thing you
all agreed on, is the importance of having a lesbian
magazine-in print and on the web. Here's where
I admit the horrible truth: without your help, in
the form of a subscription or even an outright gift
or donation, that might not continue.
Sadly, it's been a really tough couple of years
here at curve. Like all of you, we're still feeling
the economic crunch. For magazines of all sizes,
sales in bookstores and newsstands are down,
subscription sales are down and the number of
people renewing their subscriptions is down-that's
as true for us as it is
for Newsweek or any other mainstream magazine. I get it, really. When it's
between dinner and a magazine, reading is much further down on the list of
Maslov's hierarchy of needs.
But curve has always strived to be more than a mere magazine. We aim
to be a community, a rare place among all the cacophony, where queer women
can hear our own voices, where we celebrate all the parts of our lives, not just
our sexuality. And, like a few feminist and progressive organizations, we're
choosy about who we allow to advertise in the magazine. Beauty and fashion
ads are rare, tobacco and fur ads are forbidden. Why, when we need money
so badly, would we turn away an advertiser? Because we know you are loyal
to our advertisers: A full 90 percent of you said you're likely to buy from a
company that advertises in curve or curvemag.com.
Right now, curve is celebrating our 20th anniversary in print, and, though
we've cut costs everywhere, we're questioning whether we'll make it to our
21st. We've been through this before twice in curve history (many of you
were along with us as we battled a lawsuit in the early '90s) so we know what
we're experiencing is survivable-especially by such crafty dykes-but we just
can't do it anymore without outside support. So, how can you help?
+ Buy a subscription for yourself or your girlfriend (or better yet, all your
friends, the LGBT community center and your local library).
+ Send curve a donation. Vote for lesbian media with your wallet. We've
made it easy. You can PayPal money to us at publisher@curvemag.com. We
won't sell your name to anyone, and nobody but our accountant sees your
information. It's as anonymous as you want it to be (but if you like, we'll thank
you in print!).
+ Turn your next barbecue or TV viewing party into an in-house, DIY
fundraiser (we'll send you magazines).
+ Start a curve fundraising campaign in your hometown ( a marathon?
baseball playoff? bake-sale?).
+ And finally, please, come to next month's Curve 20th Anniversary Gala
and meet some of the celebrities and everyday women who have supported
curve over the years. It's a fundraiser that'll help usher us into 2011.
Just remember, we can't do it without your help. Now.
£~
6
Icurve
curve
THE BEST-SELLING
SEPTEMBER 2010
I
LESBIAN MAGAZINE
VOLUME 20 NUMBER 7
Publisher and Founder Frances Stevens
EDITORIAL
Editor in Chief Diane Anderson-Minshall
Managing Editor Kristin A. Smith
Associate Editor Rachel Shatto
Book Review Editor Rachel Pepper
Music Review Editor Margaret Coble
Contributing Editors Julia Bloch, Victoria A. Brownworth,
Gina Daggett, Sheryl Kay, Gretchen Lee, Stephanie Schroeder
Copy Editor Katherine Wright
EditorialAssistants Lisa Gunther, Liska Koenig, Anna Belle Peterson,
Eleni Stephanides, Nicole Vermeer
PUBLISHING
Director of Operations Flo Enriquez
Senior Advertising Executive Diana L Berry
Advertising Sales Rivendell Media
Marketing Assistant Rose Tachis, Sarah C. Jimenez
ART
/PRODUCTION
Art Director Stefanie Liang
Photo Editor Hayley McMillen
Production Manager Ondine Kilker
Production Artist Kelly Nuti
Web Producer Nikki Woelk
Photo Assistant Cathryn Lovecraft
CONTRIBUTING
WRITERS
Jamie Anderson, Melany Joy Beck, Rachel Beebe, Kathy Beige,
Stacy Bias, Kelsy Chauvin, Bree Clarke, Jennifer Corday, Lyndsey
D'Arcangelo, Beren deMotier, Ainsley Drew, Michele Fisher, Lauren
Marie Fleming, Katrina Fox, Serena Freewomyn, Ash Goddard,
Tania Hammidi, Kathi lsserman, Gillian Kendall, Kate Lacey, Sheela
Lambert, Charlene Lichtenstein, Karen Loftus, Sassafras Lowrey,
Ariel Messman-Rucker, Candace Moore, Alison Peters, Catherine
Plato, Aimsel L. Ponti, Heather Robinson, Laurie K. Schenden, Lori
Selke, Dave Steinfeld, Edie Stull, Robin Miner-Swartz, Yana TallonHicks, Kyra Thomson, Jocelyn Voo, Jamie Wetherbe
CONTRIBUTING
ILLUSTRATORS
& PHOTOGRAPHERS
Paul Michael Aguilar, Erica Beckman, Brie Childers, Meagan
Cignoli, Cheryl Craig, JD Disalvatore, Tony Donaldson, Sophia
Hantzes, Cheryl Mazak, Maggie Parker, Elisa Shebaro, Leslie Van
Stelten, Katherine Streeter, Kina Williams, Misty Winter
1550 Bryant Street, Suite 510
San Francisco, CA 94103
Phone (415) 863-6538 Fax (415) 863-1609
Advertising Sales (415) 863-6538 ext. 15
Subscription Inquiries (800) 705-0070 International (818) 286-3102
Advertising Email advertising@curvemag.com
Editorial Email editor@curvemag.com
Letters to the Editor Email letters@curvemag.com
Volume 20 Issue 7 Curve (ISSN 1087-867)() is published monthly (except for bimonthly
January/February and July/August) by Outspoken Enterprises, Inc., 1550 Bryant St.,
Ste. 510, San Francisco, CA 94103. Subscription price: $49.95/year, $62.95 Canadian
(U.S. funds only) and $71.95 international (U.S. funds only). Returned checks will be
assessed a $25 surcharge. Periodicals postage paid at San Francisco, CA 94114 and
at additional mailing offices (USPS 0010-355). Contents of Curve Magazine may not be
reproduced in any manner, either whole or in part, without written permission from the
publisher. Publication of the name or photograph of any persons or organizations appearing,
advertising or listing in Curve may not be taken as an indication of the sexual orientation
of that individual or group unless specifically stated. Curve welcomes letters, queries,
unsolicited manuscripts and artwork. Include SASE for response. lack of any representation
only signifies insuffJCientmaterials. Submissions cannot be returned unless a self-addressed
stamped envelope is included. No responsibility is assumed for loss or damages. The
contents do not necessarily represent the opinions of the editor, unless specifically stated. All
magazines sent discreetly. Subscription Inquiries: Please write to Curve, 1550 Bryant Street,
Suite 510, San Francisco, CA 94103, email shop@curvemag.com. Canadian Agreement
Number: 40793029. Postmaster:Send Canadianaddresschangesto shop@curvemag.com,
Curve,
PO Box 122, Niagara Falls, ON L2E 6S8. SendU.S. addresschangesto shop@curvemag.com,
. Curve,PO Box 17138,N. Hollywood,
CA 91615-7138.Printedin the U.S.
curvemag.com
>:c
a.
~
(!l
5
:c
a.
_)
LU
ID
<(
::E
od
LU
Cl
:;:)
a:
ti:
LU
(!l
LmERS
The WrightStuff
Thank you for the article, "She's a Little Bit
Country" [Vol. 20#5] on Chely Wright.
There are still many gays and lesbians who
feel trapped in their closeted existence, but
by Chely coming out so publicly, others will
follow. Each time a famous person takes a
big risk and comes out, it helps the rest of us.
Many of us who share a similar background
with Chely have experienced the same fear,
heard the same sermons in church and felt the
same shame. I appreciate Chely so much. I had
the opportunity to meet her in Kansas City,
Mo. recently and she was simply fantastic.
- VetaBordeaux,OklahomaCity, Okla.
As a mom of a lesbian, I am interested in
knowing if Chely Wright suffered a lot of
fallout from her coming out story written by
Diane Anderson-Minshall. I hope her mom
is accepting of her lesbianism and steps up to
let Chely know she is a wonderful person who
happens to be a lesbian. The article made me
sad, happy and angry. I am so sorry that Chely
has had to go through so much torment and
struggle. She sounds like a great person with
standards any parent would be proud 0£ I
enjoy your magazine. Keep up the good work.
trust that the last 'couple
of sentences don't mislead
anyone, because _I do not
regret having my daughter
first-I love, am grateful
for and appreciate Adrian
as much as her children
and was happy to see
them all included. I find
Erica Beckman's pictures
arresting and illustrative.
That direct daylight sure
brings out every wrinkle,
but
that's
only me
looking my age, which,
thanks to Old Lesbians
Organizing for Change
(OLOC), I have learned
to appreciate. Kudos for
the article and for your
exceedingly readable and
attractive mag-a service
to lesbians of every age.
I wantto get
24% Hawaii.
lei'd.
events so we can find out
how we can help. We are
not just about partying-we
have social consciences and
that "call to action" response
that comes from having to
fight for our own rights.
France.
14% Paris,
It's gayPareefor me.
-Kristin Rothenberger,
Bloomfield,NJ.
outback.
13% Australian
Tofind myCrocodile
TacklingToughSubjects
Poll
What's your dream
vacation destination?
Dundeena.
Thank you so much for
publishing
the "LesbianLondon,England.
on-Lesbian Rape" article by
I can'tresistthose
Britishbirds.
Victoria A. Brownworth
on curvemag.com. This is
LasVegas.
Sapphicsin city.
the first time I have seen
an article about woman-toPhuket,
Thailand.
Beaches,
beverages
woman sexual violence. Until
andbeautifullesbians.
it happened to me, I didn't
RiodeJaneiro,Brazil.
think it was possible. Even .
Carnaval
hereI come.
after it happened, I didn't
think it was rape until I saw a
Reykjavik,
Iceland.
Lezziepresident,
-Alix Dobkin,
counselor who specialized in
yesplease.
Woodstock,N.Y.
treating survivors of same-sex
CapeTown,South
domestic violence. I still don't
Africa.SapphicSafari
Tried and True
talk about it to many people,
adventure.
Wedding Tips
even
though it happened
According
to a curvemag.com
poll
over seven years ago. It's
I just wanted to thank
Serena Freewomyn, writer of "Have Your something that is rarely acknowledged
Wedding Cake and Eat It, Too" [Vol. or discussed, just as domestic violence in
20#3], for finally helping out the ladies
lesbian relationships is rarely acknowledged.
who don't know how to plan their
Thank you for writing this and helping
those of us who are survivors feel less alone.
wedding. I loved the article and did almost
-Posted by purplebutterjlyon curvemag.com
everything to the letter. It cost my partner
and me $3,000 to pull off our special day.
Editor's
Note:Go to curvemag.com
to see moreof
- Tina Dwight, Kansas City, Mo.
11%
10%
10°/o
8%
6%
4%
Kudosfor Oil Spill Coverage
Ijust finished reading"The Devil Went Down
to Louisiana" about the Gulf Oil disaster on
curvemag.com. I want to commend you for
putting together an article that is unbiased
and very comprehensive in its presentation
of all the issues around this tragedy. It is
important that our community gets an
objective look at this and other current
award-winninginvestigative
journalistVictoria
A. Bro~nworth's
Jive-partserieson hiddensocial
issuesimpactingthe lesbiancommunity.
Corrections:In "Our Stores, Our Lives;'
Giovanni's Room co-founders should have
been listed as Tom Weinberg, Danny Sherbo
and Pat Hill. Amy Andre co-authored
Bisexual Health. Aynee 0. Joujon-Roche
fronts The Restless Blues Band.
-Nancy Schroeder,Kenosha,Wis.
Dobkinon Dobkin
I very much enjoyed reading Rene Rosechild's
well-written, mostly accurate (I met Liza
months after leaving my husband) article
"Telling the Tale" [Vol. 20#5]. I have to
s Icurve
Sendletters
to:curve magazine
1550Bryant
St.,Ste.510SanFrancisco,
CA94103
WRITE
TOCURVE!
Subscriber
Services
arenowavailable
at
curvemag.corn/customerservice:
EMAIL:
letters@curvemag.com• subscribe
FAX:415-863-1609
• renew
GOTO:curvemag.com/letters • payyourbill
• getmissing
issues
• change
address
• givea gift
CONTRIBUTORS
"Did someone say roller derby? Hot!" says KinaWilliams,about the
opportunity to photograph Derby Grrls at the historic Oaks Park
Roller Rink in Portland, Ore. (pg. 50). "I spent almost my entire sixth
and seventh grades on roller skates, and I've finally gotten back on them;.'
Williams admits proudly. The new surge of leagues throughout the
country and the sharp increase in mainstream popularity, drew her to
this project to help insure that queer derby grrls remain visible. Williams
has recently taken over ownership of The Hideout Photography Forum
and blog, and is working on a <;:onceptualgallery project for 2011.
From the Editor
Ever have one of
those days when
everything goes
wrong? That's
been our whole
When curve editorial assistant LiskaKoenigisn't busy banging
on Japanese taiko drums or writing anything and everything we
throw her way (she penned the Intern's Pick on Joan Jett, pg.
52), she loves to enjoy her morning coffee at the beach and cook
scrumptious German meals for her friends. She assures us that
she is not a Hasselhoff fan, but we've heard "Hooked on a Feeling"
coming from her cubicle ... twice. We never want her to leave.
month at curve.
First, copy chief
Katherine Wright
was taken down
by a tennis game:
a broken hip hospitalized her
during production. So, if you see
"If words could describe my time at curve, I wouldn't need
typos here, please forgive us.
to lug around this camera;' says contributing photographer and
former photography assistant BrittanyJeffers.An explorer of all
things fun and unique,Jeffers, a Hawaii native, finds her inspiration
through experiencing new places and people. Jeffers' photographs
have appeared in many curve issues, including her portrait of
SF Pride director Amy Andre in the June issue. Jeffers aspires to
have her photography contribute to continuing the progression of
LGBT rights and other causes around the world.
Also, our German-native editorial
assistant Liska Koenig's work
visa ran out. Then, when things .
couldn't get worse, we had a
major meltdown of our computer
server. For about 24 hours, as
we prepped to go to press, the
backup server-that
hosts all of
the magazine's files from 1990
on -went
kaput. Talk about
techie hysteria. Thankfully, our
production guru Ondine Kilker
and a couple of computer geeks
(thanks Randy and Bill) came
to our rescue and we managed
to save our 20 years of work,
and get this issue out to you.
1 Pride superstars(fromleft):FoxyladyPam
Grier,curve founderFrancesStevens,
funny
girl DanaGoldberg
and TheRealL WordsMikey
Koffman2 Partygoers
at L.A.'sLesbianAttack3
GLAAD
Awardsgirls(fromleft):Clementine
Ford,
CybillShepherd,curve's senioradvertising
executiveDianaBerry,singerChelyWright
4 OurSanFranciscoPridefloat clebrating
20 yearsof publishing5 Freedomto Marry
protestorsin Minnesota6 Volunteers
at L.A.
HarveyMilk Daycelebration
But, if you happen to be a major
shareholder in Apple, spread the
word: I think a big equipment
upgrade will top our holiday wish
list this year!
~
Diane Anderson-Minshall
Editor in Chief
September 2010
I9
1
_Agricultural activist and organic
grocer Kelly Clark cops to a shoe
addiction, a passion for organic
food and a love of heady women.
Which Sneaker Is Right For You?
Our editors take to the pavement with these cool kicks.
SHOE TerraPlanaLucy
RYKA
Womens's
UltimaRun
USE Everydayuse.Sinceit's ultra
A stablerunningshoe,perfect
light andflexibleit makesa great for neutralrunners,walkersand
clumsylesbians.
travelshoe.
spreads RYKAis theonlyperformance
SPECIAL VivoBarefoottechnology
footwearcompany
dedicated
FEATURE yourtoeswideandflat, theway
weweremeantto be.Youfeel
likeyou'rewalkingbarefoot,
withoutthefearof pointyobjects,
filthystreetsor yourpeeling
pedicure.
makesecosexy.
SEXY TerraPl.ana
FACTOR Thesebabiesaremadewith
recycledmaterialsanddesigned
for posturealignment,butstill
superhipandurban.
exclusively
to women,which
meanstheirshoesfit us
better-Narrowheel,widefoot,
lateralguidance
supportshank
for stability.
Youtradearchsupport,
breathable
meshandexcellent
tractionfor sexappeal.
Reebok
Easytone
Reeinspire
NewBalance
759
Everyday
use.Thesecomfy
kicksmakethe worldyour
personaltrainer.
Goodfor shorterrunsandroad
races,because
of its lightweight
andflexibility.
Airpodsontheballof thefoot
andhealcausesmildinstability
whichyourmuscles
workto
compensate,
resultingin a work
outfor yourlegs.Andaccording
to theads,theabilityto make
yourboobsjealousof yourbutt.
Stabilitywebdesignandshock
absorbingheel,meansthat
youget a light-weightshoe
with enoughstabilityto carry
youthrougha roadrace.Shoe
hassnugfit, so it is perfectfor
narrowerfeet.
Theycomein a varietyof colors
includingdiscotheque-friendly
gold,soyoudon'thaveto forfeit
glamourin yourquestfor the
superiorposterior.
It's a runningshoe,sobyits
nature,kindalow.Buttheaqua
tonesare.nice.
Youmightget
the attentionof the hot locker
roomdyke.
SUPERHEROWalkingonwater,or at least
POWER feelinglikeyoucould.
Speedbaby.You'llfeellikeMarion Bouncing
quartersmile-highoff
Jonesin notime.
youreasy-toned
bum
Lightening
speed.I bestedmy
5Ktimein these.
andstylish
SAYS You'rea conscious
ABOUTYOU dyke.
Youcareaboutyourfeetmore
thananyoneon TheL Word.
Youwantthe gymbunnybooty
withoutthegymbunnyfees.
Youlivein thefast lane.
Passingonyourleft.
$60(ryka.com)
$125(reebok.com)
$95 (newbalance.com)
PRICE $125(terraplana.com)
..
::J
w
::,
(!J
~
The Sole of San Miguel
z
~
en
a:
w
~
I first heard about the fabulous footwear
of San Miguel Shoe in the tiny village of
Ajijic, near in central Mexico. A welldressed, well-traveled Canadian woman
assured me that the sandal with three-inchwide elastic straps is the most comfortable
shoe for maneuvering Mexico's treacherous
cobblestone streets, and suggested I visit the
factory store (smshoe.com)when I reached
San Miguel de Allende.
In the flagship shop, located appropriately
off a narrow cobblestone lane, my selection
of brown slides were dropped by a clerk from
the second floor overhang like manna from
heaven. Inside, Martha Muniz a.k.a. the
Sandal Lady sat at her desk smiling, ready for
primetime. Despite her rumored penchant
for eccentric dress and daring col~ choices,
including Paris Hilton-esque bright pink,
that day she was looking sedate in navy blue.
Since then, my one-strap sandals have
become my favorite on uneven terrain, and
have served me well on the dusty cracked
streets of Chiang Mai, Thailand as well as
on the mean concrete streets of New York
City. They're a must for any world-traveling
woman. [Carole
Terwilliger
Meyers]
::?
a:
w
(!)
::J
..J
~w
1-
w
..J
0
~
()
[i]
w
l-
b
J:
u.i
z
<(
8
en
~
::J
..J
~
~
52
ej
~
~
~
a:
w
J:
()
a:
::,
N
~0
(.)
z
The· Hot Girls Are Tying One On
6
g:
~
(.)
~
00
i
z
~
~
~
Detroit-based Cyberoptix Tie Lab have
been making sexy dyke accessories since
2006. From power-dykes to riot grrrls, these
colorful handprinted ties are the perfect
addition. It's owner Bethany Shorb's mission
to bring "punky fashion statement for
executives bound to the neck noose, and
a sharply-styled alternative for those
who don't need to wear a tie, but
choose to do so:' Coming
from one of the country's
largest eco-friendly print
shops, Cyberoptix ties are
hand-made to order from
rehashed vintage, resulting
in colorful, snarkily designed
neckwear that won't make
feel like you' re wearing
grandpa's old duds.
Low prices, hot
gender-bending
photo shoots and
playfully-named prints like "Fool's Gold;'
"Terminal Illness" (an homage to Swine Flu)
and an X-ray print called "Skeletie" will have
you happily sporting neck ties, on and off the
clock. Shorb is especially happy to see her
LGBT clients wearing her ties. "We proudly
support human rights for everyone
and aren't afraid to say so. If it
scares a few conservative clients
away, they can shop elsewhere:'
We'd let Shorb tie us up any day.
[YanaTallon-Hicks]
d
(/)
a:
w
~a:
co
0
r
The Gaydar
!z
Here's a taste of lesbians in pop culture this month.
Who missed the mark and who was right on target?
~
0
~
0
(/)
a.
::J
u..
::J
u.
(.)
SN
~
:i:
fa,
:.::
8
a:
(.)
..J
w
<(
I
(.)
~
g
a:
w
Q;,
z
~w
:::E
:::E
::>
(/)
<(
:::E
:::E
w
~
~
@_
0
a:
~
..J
~
5
~
w
::J
Lesbian musician Bitch
was pulled at the last
moment from Oregon's
OUT/LOUD
queer women's
music festival,which
she had been booked to
headline. The unanimous
decision came after the
festivalbecame aware of comments she'd
previously made to the media that they felt
were transphobic ... "I Kissed a Girl's"Katy
Penyhas condemned
Lady Gaga's'i\lejandro"
video on her Twitter
account, saying,"using
blasphemy as entertainment is as cheap as a
comedian telling a fart
joke''... A new study
published in TheJoumal
of Pediatricsshows
that children raised in lesbian families have
higher self-esteem, more confidence, do better
academicallyand also are less likely to have
behavioral problems, such as rule-breaking
and aggression... Illinois state
treasurer AlexGiannoulias
has
signedan executiveorder providing
gay and lesbianstate employees
the same familyleavebenefits
extended to their heterosexual
married co-workers.This includes
12 weeks of unpaid leave to care
for a sick partner or relative,as well as the
opportunity to take time off for the adoption
or birth of a child... LGBT groups in Hawaii
were outraged after the
state Gov.LindaLlngle's
veto of a bill that would
have recognized same-sex
couples in civil unions
in the state-eight
years after promising
she would not ... Arlene
Ramery,
a lesbian and former NYPDcop, has
filed a $40 million suit against the City of
NewYork,saying that sexual and homophobic
harassment at the 49th
Precinct, where she
was the only female
detective, caused her to
retire after more than
18 years on the job.
[Sassafras
Lowrey]
..J
iii
She'sNoGagaTilaTequiladoesclearance
rack LadyGaga.Nobodycares
September 2010
I 13
LESBOFILE
Sapphic· Scandals
The Lady comes out, secret love affairs and a lesbian
sex tape. By Jocelyn Voo
TheLadyLikestheLadies
A LesbianontheCourt?
The small, sassy and underestimated rapper
LadySovereign
made waves when she officially
came out in May. In the past, Sovereign had
avoided making statements regarding her
sexuality, but in an interview with Diva
magazine, the 24-year-old finally tackled the
subject head-on.
"I was a bit worried about it, but now I don't
really give as---;• she said."You can't hide away
forever. It's just stupid, and now I've come out
I feel a lot more comfortable with myself:'
Sex and politics have always been intertwined: Recently, we've seen everything from
career-ending dalliances by politicians to
the political divide over gay marriage. Now,
enter ElenaKagan,Supreme Court nominee.
The blogosphere lit up with questions about
Kagan's sexuality, but the issue was scarcely
mentioned in the mainstream media ... that
is, until Kagan's alleged lesbianism was stated
as a fact by a blogger on CBSNews.com.
After that, the White House went full
steam ahead to quash the rumor, as are
Kagan's friends, who say the brouhaha is
"distracting" from her qualifications-and
we're apt to agree. Really,just because she has
short hair and wears almost no makeup? Just
because she hasn't introduced a significant
other to the public? What, are lesbians not
allowed on the court?
UkeAttractsUke
Sure, Lindsay Lohan's days of making headlines for partying all night (again) are over~
well for up to 90 days, plus rehab time
anyway-but there's still plenty to talk about
in the romance department. The latest news
is that she's chasing a new girl. Photographer
and reality show star Julia lndrani PalChaudhuri
has been spotted out on dates with
Lohan, and Indrani herself told the New York
Post,"We have been spending a lot of time
together. I have never had a relationship with
a woman before, but Lindsay is just somebody
who I find fascinating, gorgeous and extremely
smart, as well as super-hot:'
However-and
this may be one for the
record books-Lohan denied the affair: "No,
no, no ...In NO way am I dating her;' she told
Us Weekly.After watching Lohan's appearance
on Indrani's new reality show, we believe her.
14lcurve
Love,Love,Love
Courtney
Love,best known for marrying one
of the quintessential rockers of the '90s,
Kurt Cobain, may now be known for
hooking up with one of the quintessential models of the same
decade, KateMoss.
"It was just a thing
that happened in Milan''
in the '90s, Love told the
Irish magazine Hot Press.
"It happened and it was fun
and whatever. And she talks about it, and so
I hope she doesn't get mad that I outed her
about it:'
With the crazy, drug-addled history ofboth
Love and Moss, it's hard to know what's true.
Yeah, it couldhave happened. In fact, we like __
to imagine it did.
LesbianSexTapeScandal
Reality star KendraWilkinson
was first introduced to mainstream audiences on The Girls
Next Door, the butchest of Playboyfounder
Hugh Hefner's three girlfriends, a role she then
spun off into Kendra, her own reality show
on E! Kendra follows her life after He£ with
her husband, Hank Baskett, a wide receiver
for the Philadelphia Eagles. But things may
have gotten a little tooreal for Wilkinson now,
as she is the headliner on yet another reality w
~2
show-a sex tape.
The announcement of a sex tape isn't ~
particularly shocking, but this tape ~
has graphic, hardcore lesbian ~
sex with a woma~ named c3
Taryn. Considering that
Kendra spent her formative •
years in the Playboy ~
a:
Mansion having 00
bubble baths with ~
Hef' s two other
girlfriends, it makes us ~
wonder what else went on ~
()
behind closed doors. ■
8
_J
J
i
l
She Said
Women's resorts, bars,
cafes, bookstores & more,
across the US, Canada,
Europe & beyond.
Plus lesbian cruises &
tours. women's festivals.
pride celebrations,
LGBT film fests,
eco-adventures & morel
6LU
cc
~
~
Cu
z
ti:
::>
8
f
Call for a free catalog
4~~-~~~~
or visit us online at
(/)
::>
!!l.
a:
LU
~
~
~
a:
~a.
<i:
~
~
z
a:
0
J:
z
LU
~
z
5
ID
(!)
~
(.)
---,...-_..;...._.
_____________
_
Get Gurl Scout by Damron
on your iPhonel
Avoiding the Butch Blues
Can you be a modern femme without becoming
a Stepford Wife? By Lipstick and Dipstick
Dear Lipstick and Dipstick: Is it possible to love a butch woman and
not step on her toes by offering to take your own car to get the wiper
blades changed? I want to be a modern wife, not Mrs. Cleaver. Help!
- Frustrated Femme
Lipstick:Silly girl, butch women are pretty
progressive these days. Well, at least Dipstick
is. Although I'm the femme, when were on
the road, Dipstick let's me change the tire
when we have a flat, even if I'm in a cute skirt
and it's below freezing outside.
Dipstick:
Hold on there, Lipstick! I'm the one
who actually put the new doughnut on the
rental car when we blew out that tire during
our book tour.
Lipstick:
Yeah, after I got the old one off and
found the new· tire in the trunk.
Dipstick:
Well, someone had to call the bookstore and tell them we were going to be late.
Anyway, Ms. Cleaver, I sympathize with you.
I really do. I came out as a feminist before
I came out as lesbian or butch, and it still
puzzles me that there are butches out there
who want their women to stay home, cook,
clean, have babies and lay on their backs in
bed. Those tired sex roles are not what makes
you butch or femme. It's how you feel on the
inside. I love a femme woman who understands
basic house ma4itenance, the NCAA bracket
and how to take me for a ride now and then.
Lipstick:
Here, here, Dip. Who wants to just
stand by while the butch does all the heavy
lifting? Most of us keep our nails trimmed
for more than one reason. We like to not only
get on 'er, but also get 'er done. Stand your
ground, fellow femme, and grab those power
tools (or wiper blades) whenever you damn
well please. The butch will have to deal. It's
2010 and OK to be a modern femme.
DearLipstickandDipstick:My girlfriendandI
havebeentogether
for 1Omonthsandit's been
16
Icurve
verydifficult.Notbecauseof her,but because
of me. She's everythingI've ever wantedin
a womanand more.She makesme happyin
all aspectsof our relationship,
but sincethe
beginningit's been hard for me to do the
simplestthing,likebe honest.BeforeI metmy
girlfriend,
I usedto party,smokepotandhang
outwithfriendsall the time{I'm20 yearsold).
Whenwe met,I decidedto changemy life and
stoppartying,
dropall of mybadhabits.Orso I
thought.Butin a matterof 10 months,I've lost
her trust,security,loveand heart.No matter
how manyfightswe've had, however,she's
alwaysstayed.I lovemygirlfriendwithall my
heart.CanI fix this?Howcan I proveto her
thatI wantthisrelationship
as badlyas I want
her?-LyingFool
Dipstick:Obviously, your girlfriend sees
potential or she wouldn't have stayed
despite how hard you're making it for her. It's
either that, or she's extremely codependent.
You say you've stopped doping, but as any
addict will tell you, quitting is just part of the
change that needs to happen. You also have
to change your thinking, change your habits
and take control of your actions. I suggest you
check out a 12-step program and refer your
honey to an Al-Anon group. Start getting
involved with some positive activities you
will both enjoy. And conquer your lying the
same way you do your drug habit: One day
at a time.
Lipstick:I'll tell you how you can prove it:
Stop lying. Your lack of integrity is a gnarly
character flaw that needs fixing. Why your
girl is still around is beyond me; I'd have
kicked you to the curb months ago. Beyond
simply telling the truth, you desperately
need to examine what you're lying about,
Lipstick & Dipstick ADVICE
and why-as this will be incredibly telling.
Dipstick is right: Don't only get busy with
positive activities, also surround yourself
with positive people. The latter is just as
important to your well,being.
DearLipstickand Dipstick:I didn'tcomeout
to myselfuntilmysecondsemester
in college,
andI neverwanteda guy to touchme, ever.
My problemis my comingout was a slow,
slowprocess.
In otherwords,I amcurrentlya
virgin.I finallyreachedthestageI shouldhave
in my mid20s and I am approaching
my mid
30s.Anyadvice?-VirginTerritory
Lipstick:You put your right tit in, you put
your right tit out, you put your left tit in and
you shake it all about. You do the dykey pokey
and you turn her inside out. And that's what
it's all about.
Dipstick:
Lip, this isn't the hokey pokey.
Lipstick:I know. I wanted to loosen her up.
Dipstick:Well, she's probably not gonna be
loose the first time she has sex; she'll be ner,
vous as hell. She'll be shaking in her boots as
much as the vibrator shaking in her hand. We
were all nervous Nellies the first time. And
do you want to know a secret? Most of us are
nervous the first time with every new lover.
Old pro Dipstick included. It's kind of like
starting all over again. Your situation is com,
pounded for you, because it's not just sex, but
you're a virgin dater, too. I suggest you take it
slow and focus on meeting someone you can
partner know you're a total virgin. Just let her
know you've never been with a woman before.
In the meantime, study up on lesbian humpty
hump. The Whole Lesbian Sex Book by Felice
Newman is a great place to start, but also
check out the Best Lesbian Erotica series.
Lipstick:
Madonna once said that losing her
virginity was a career move. While I'm not
encouraging you to be that loose, you should
chill about it like Madonna. Dip makes some
good suggestions, but why not check out some
good girl,on,girl porn for some pointers, too?
Try the Crash Pad series by Shine Louise
Houston or Hard Love & How to Fuck in
High Heels from S.I_.R.Productions. ■
be comfortable with. Browse the personal ~
_
ads, attend lesbian mixers, go on a lesbian
Tune in to curvemag.com/lipstickanddip,
cruise, join a coming out group. I don't think
stick to learn how to "make your move."
there's any reason you need to let a potential
•• Or, write to tv@lipstickdipstick.com.
September 2010 j 17
ADVICERelationships
Love Across the Border
Don't forget to pack your FBI background check.
By Jamie Anderson
What does a lesbian bring on her 37th date?
Answer: An immigration visa. Well, you do
if you're me, and you fall for a handsome
Canadian. I know it's only Canada, where they
speak English and love American Idol,but it is
a different country. Here's my story. Treat it
as a cautionary tale or simply as inspiration to
find your own gorgeous Canadian.
At the Michigan Womyn's Music Festival
I see friends every year that I've met online
on the festival boards. One of them had
been sending posts from exotic places like
Sri Lanka. "Working for a humanitarian
organization has its perks;' she wrote. "One
of them is getting an apartment near a beach.
The downside is that sometimes it's right after
a tsunami:' I was delighted.
We were both in relationships so I didn't
see her in that way, although I thought
she was attractive and intelligent. Hey, I'm
not dead. Then I got dumped from a sevenyear relationship. She showed up at the next
festival, told me that her relationship had also
changed and gave me a full-on hug that had all
my parts screaming. Oh yeah!
Things went from there. That's all I'm going
to say because I'm not that kind of a writer.
Besides, I'd resort to euphemisms, and you'd
only laugh at me. After a long kiss goodbye, I
set off for North Carolina and she flew back
to Sri Lanka.
I thank the goddess of cheap phone rates
for the progression of our relationship. We
could have emailed, but I loved her sexy
accent, and she laughed at my jokes. We
didn't seem too different, except that she
grew up in a small town in Ontario, Canada
and I'm from suburban Phoenix.
I was thrilled when she moved back to
Canada-at
least we were on the same
continent-and
we could have stayed in
long-distance relationship, but when a cluster
of disasters happened at the same time around
the world it got us thinking. If there's a big one,
we wanted to be together. We decided to get
married so that I could move to Ottawa and
she could sponsor me as a family member.
Trips across the border are interesting. My
partner is annoyed by the long waits at U.S.
a
1s
Icurve
Customs, and she's never sure what to reply
when they ask why she's visiting. She's learned
that "To have hot sex with an American
woman'' is not the appropriate answer.
The Canadians are much kinder to me, but
U.S. officials have delayed me twice. The first
time I was asked why I'd been in Canada, I
said, "To visit my fianc~e:' The guy replied,
"Oh, he must've been happy:' I corrected
him: "She:' Beat one ... two ... "You've been
selected for a random check. Give us your
passport and keys, pull over and go inside:'
I did as requested and slunk into a building
crammed with people.
I jumped when my name was called. The
official grimly asked ifI knew why I was there.
I grinned and said, "Because I'm cute and you
want to give me a lot of money?" A voice in my
head was screaming, Crap, wrong answer! He
waited before responding, "Are you kidding?
I work for the U.S. government:' After some
additional back-and-forth, he decided I was
not going to overthrow the government and
returned my passport and keys.
I visited New York City for the weekend
then went back to Canada. A week later, I
returned to the States. When the U.S.
border guard asked what I'd been doing in
Canada, I again used the "f" word (fiancee)
and again I was selected for a "random" check.
I puiled over and sauntered into the dreaded
office again.
The downside to moving north is that winter
is almost as scary as the thought of Sarah Palin
becoming president. I can't see Russia from our
house but it'sjust as cold. We make jokes about
my partner keeping me warm, and since we're
both menopausal, that has multiple meanings.
Turns out, you can't just marry a Canadian
and move. She had to prove she could support
my newly-out-of-work ass. I had to get fingerprinted and an FBI background check. They
wanted to know every address and job I'd had
since I was 18 and wanted documentation to
back it up. I had to guarantee I'd love cheese on
french fries and say'eh''at least 50 times a day.
The immigration process was supposed to
take four to 10 months. It took less than three.
The U-Haul"is booked and the cats can prove
their shots are current. Yes, I can bring them
(without quarantine), but I can't bring my plants
or my eight-year-old Toyota. I am mourning the
loss of my irises but I am comforted by the fact
that it's too cold for them in Ontario anyway.
Just when we finally get a president with
an IQ higher than a carrot, I move north. Go
figure. That'll teach me to hug a handsome
Canadian, eh? ■
Money ADVICE
doing things with your money that are in
accordance to what's important to you?" And
what could be more romantic than
saving up together for an island getaway for two?
Put the Joy in Your Joint Account
How to stop fighting about money. By Heather Robinson
Anyone who has been in a relationship is no
stranger to the calm financial discussion that
quickly elevates into an all out battle royale. It's
this common problem that inspired Jacquette
Timmons to write Financial Intimacy in an
effort to help couples stop fighting about
money and get closer by becoming more
financially secure. The book combines real-life
gQries, exercises and practical habits to create
a road map to financial success. Timmons, a
national investment expert and money coach,
has been working in the financial industry
for 24 years and is the founder of New York's
Sterling Investment Management, making
the author a sage of fiscal wisdom. Here's her
advice for managing the money talk:
Start with yourself.It's best to have some
familiarity with your own financial house
before you start knocking on someone else's door. Timmons recommends
doing some self reflection before approaching
your partner, especially if you've fought about
money before. She emphasizes that financial
intimacy begins with you: "I don't think
you can effectively, and with compassion,
create it with someone else until you've
gone through the process of creating it with
yourself:' Stare by thinking about your own
history with money, good and bad habits,
and what you're hoping to achieve.
a:
~
Knowthat this is hardfor everyone.
If you
<(
~ have tried discussing finances with your
~ partner and felt like a pig on roller skates, take
Q comfort in knowing you're not alone. Most
people have no idea how to communicate
constructively about money. "It's not something that a majority of us learn how to
do within our own family units. We don't
really, in general, talk about money or have a
model for how to do that;' says Timmons. Not
judging your partner and taking responsibility
for your own issues with money are keys to
keeping things civil and productive.
Put it downon paper.Writing down what
you want is an amazingly powerful tool,
says Timmons. She often sees uncertainty
and fear of failure derailing this process. "Part
of the reason that people don't put it down
on paper is that they haven't figured out the
how [of becoming financially secure], and my
whole thing is it's not your responsibility at the
beginning to know the how. Writing down
what you want is the first seep in figuring out
how to get it;' she says.
Getit on.One of Timmons' biggest goals is
to change the perception that talking about
money isn't romantic. "It can be the most
loving, nurturing, romantic thing you can do:'
The key is co initiate calm, proactive discussions as opposed to the more common, much
louder reactive types. Timmons recommends
meeting on a regular basis, weekly or monthly,
and trying to create an environment that
fosters relaxation. "If you do participate in
libations, have a glass of wine on a Friday
night and just talk about what you need
to discuss: how much money was spent
that week, what your goals are, are you
Realizewhatyou'rereallyfightingabout.
Though couples often fight about money,
Timmons has learned that most disagreements are really about something else. "I
would say 99 percent of our goals have a
financial component to them. Because the
resources you have are not infinite, your
goals are fighting for those resources, even
if you're not thinking that that is the case:'
If you haven't articulated and discussed your
goals with your partner you may be setting
yourself up for trouble, warns Timmons.
A1so, she recommends keeping in mind that
there will always be three kinds of goals: your
goals, her goals and shared goals." Sometimes
you have to negotiate which of those sets
of goals will be a priority in terms of how
you allocate your resources:' And keep the
channels of communication flowing.
Learnto recognize
yourownblindspots.While
it's much more fun to comment on your
partner's shortcomings, learning to recognize
your own blind spots is more powerful. The
most common weak spot Timmons sees is
underestimating how much money you spend.
She has her clients practice the discipline of
tracking their spending for a month and they
are always surprised at the results. Most people
consistently underestimate how much money
they spend. Though tracking your everyday
spending is not particularly fun, it can give you
great insight in to where your money is really
going and why you keep ending up in the red. ■
30 SECONDS
TOCLOSE
THEDEAL
Another
bookthatfocuses
onwomen
andmoney
is Marketplace
reporter
Andrea
Gardner's
The30-Second
Seduction,
whichexplores
the
relationship
between
advertisers
and
femaleconsumers.
WhatGardner
finds
isthatwomenholdanimmense
amount
of
purchasing
powerandsuggests
advertisers
needtospeaktothedynamic
modern
woman.(sea/press.com)
[Frances
Yee]
September 2010
I 19
DYKE
DRAMA
U-Hauls Vs. Federal Rights
Why we don't want "seperate but equal." By Michele Fisher
"I could not afford eight ex-wives;' lamented
our serial monogamist friend over lunch the
other day. The rest of us nodded our heads
in agreement. She may hold the record for
cohabitation with the most ex-girlfriends,
but not by much.
"How many of those women would you
have married for real," I asked the octoex. She hesitated and finally answered,
"Maybe two:'
Most of us have played house with a
woman or two-or eight. I have moved in
with a woman I was dating for the following
reasons (or a combination the·reof): I was
broke. I wanted sex without having to leave
home. I felt sorry for her. My house burned
down. She wouldn't take no for an answer.
The apartment had a pool and a balcony. I
liked her dog.
The amount of time and thought I usually
devoted to deciding whether to move in with
a woman was about the same as I take to pick
an entree at dinner-and
I am not a picky
eater-and yes, I know how that sounds.
Gay marriage, big deal. I thought that
until not too long ago, in fact right up until
yesterday, when this column was due. I really
couldn't fathom what all the hubbub was
about. After all, we are already in committed
relationships. We even have commitment
ceremonies. We have children together, buy
homes, join political and social groups as
couples. I mean, what is marriage but a piece
of paper?
Spending the rest of your life with one
person is a big deal. And sleeping with one
person forever is a super-duper big deal. I
really didn't buy the idea that our promises
were any less valid than federally blessed
ones. But I now see that feeling "less than" is
taking its toll on our collective soul. A commitment ceremony is all we've got right now, but
let's face it-it ain't a real wedding. Like it
or not, we were raised with the same view of
marriage as our heterosexual counterparts.
As much as I have pooh-poohed the
concept of gay marriage and advocated that
20 Icurve
we leave God and the church out of the
thing and have civil unions, some part of me
realizes that many of us don't want "separate
but equal;' we want exactly the same thing
that everybody else has. We want to see a
lesbian Bridezilla. We long to witness an
angry lesbian cursing out an unsuspecting
salesclerk and ripping a lace veil in two with
her bare hands and then storming out of
the bridal shop, leaving her poor mother to
sort things out. We want our chance to behave
poorly and chalk it up to wedding stress.
The act of planning a wedding makes you
really consider if you have found your soul
mate and continue to question it every hour
until the thing is over.
You two will have to make a lot of decisions
and many of them will be about things you
just don't give a crap about, like buttercream
versus fondant for the icing on the wedding
cake. (Wait a minute-that's
a food-related
decision, so it is important.) Every day before
the wedding, there are more ridiculous but
expensive decisions to make, and any one of
a::
~w
a::
tr
w
z
ff
J:
~
them can cause a couple to implode. You are
tired and she is exhausted and you are both
broke but some putz keeps calling and asking
you about whether you want a swan or a
dolphin ice sculpture on the buffet table at
the reception.
A wedding is a production and everybody
wants a part in it. One of your friends has
insisted on doing the invitations, but your
fiancee has told you that she would sooner
have the Unabomber do the invitationsat least he can spell. Your girl's sister fancies
herself a songbird and has volunteered to
warble you down the aisle, but you think she
sounds more like a parrot on meth.
Disagreements, stress, financial ruin-all
are part of the wedding planning process. If
you two can make it through a wedding, then
you have a better than 50 percent chance of
survival as a couple, which is about average
for het marriages and certainly a lot higher
than our current success rates.
What marriage is really about is holding
you to your word. You cannot later say, "I
meant that I loved you, not that I was in love
with you" when you want to move on with
some tramp. There was a ceremony and food
and lots of witnesses and a videographer who
heard you say blah, blah, blah, "rill death do
us pare:'
So, when our marriages are legal-and the
very same as the unions of our heterosexual
counterparts-we
will no doubt find that
we have to be more honest with ourselves
and with each other. Right now, you can say,
"What the heck, lee's give it a whirl;' when
the woman you are dating suggests taking
things to the next level. But when the next
level is a legally binding lifetime commitment, you may have to stop and think for
a moment. This isn't going to end with an
uncomfortable chat, some tears and a few
months of sniping texts and hostile emails.
This is marriage and divorce.
Today, a lezzie divorce just means grabbing
a few things and moving into a new place. Oh
sure, there may be a few ugly moments when
you're deciding who actually gets to keep the
sex toys and the cat. But real divorce is something else completely. That old dyke tradition
of being best buddies with your ex will be
gone faster than your sobriety at the bachelorette parry. Lawyers, settlements, division of
property, child custody battles-and all of it
very expensive, even when it's not.
But divorce is a hazard that we are willing
to face. High rewards involve high risk, but
that doesn't scare me. I will now join the
fight for gay marriage in earnest. Bring on
the rabbi, the veils and the bad bridesmaid
dresses. No more almost for us, we demand
nationally recognized nuptials.
By the way, the wife thinks I am sincere
but quixotic about this whole gay marriage
thing. She just wants gay marriage so that
we'll have the same rights as everybody else.
She thinks it sucks that she and I have to
pay five grand more in federal taxes than her
married couples do, and she thinks it double
sucks that her straight counterparts will have
their husbands' Social Security money after
they perish, but she will have to make it on
her own meager allotment, which is a shame,
especially since I will be just as big a pain in
the ass as any old man. ■
erto
September 2010
I21
POLITICS
The Power of Teaching
Why literacy is independence. By Victoria A. Brownworth
September marks the official end of summer.
Yet for me and others who teach, September
marks not an end, but a beginning-new
classes, new students, new ideas. I began my
teaching career by accident, through activism.
It started with a program teaching illiterate
adults while I was in college as part of one of
my classes. After college, that work translated
into a stint in the AmeriCorps. I have beeri
teaching as an adjunct to my other work as a
journalist and writer ever since.
Teaching is probably the most underappreciated job on earth and yet it's difficult to
imagine a more important job. Good teachers
can turn poor students into great ones. Bad
teachers can turn even the best students away
from learning. The teachers who touch you
mark you forever and literally change your life.
One of my high school English teachers
changed mine-he made me see my great
love, books, in a whole new way. Dominic
Corsaro introduced me to the secrets of
language and the power behind it. I learned
about subtext and metaphor and the panoply
of enticements that are embedded in language.
22
Icurve
These things have application to every aspect
of our lives.Before, I was merely reading. After,
I was immersed-I
could not help but see
the layers that could be peeled back upon
language to reveal yet more. It was thrilling.
And empowering.
I still remember the day that it all became
clear to me. We were reading D.H. Lawrence's
Women in Love. The subtext of the homoerotic relationship between the two main
male characters was a revelation. That there
were secrets in language that one needed a
special key to uncover-was a moment that
is forever seared in my mind's eye. The door
opened to the secret garden of language. I
entered and never left.
As a teenaged lesbian, seeing a queer
relationship revealed in a high school English
class just one year after Stonewall meant that
there would be other such stories to discover.
It ~eant that there was a world of writing out
there for me to decode, now that I h;J been
given the tools with which to do so.
My own experience of learning made
teaching people to read a political act. I told
my students again and again that learning
to read was the most revolutionary thing
they could ever do. In my excitement and
political fervor, I would tell them that society
was predicated on maintaining an illiterate
underclass that could never succeed and
move ahead because language was the tool of
power and illiteracy was the way power was
kept away from them.
Yet despite my youthful n.uvete, it was
true. Women and girls are purposefully kept
illiterate in much of the developing world.
It was illegal to teach slaves to read here
in America. One of the main differences
between the developed world and the
developing world today is who can read and
who can't. It's obvious that literacy is the
greatest tool to independence.
Books had been my ticket out of an
abusive and poverty-stricken childhood. I
knew what language could do-that it could
open not just the door Mr. Corsaro had shown
me, but to being able to stand up for one's self
in life. For my ~tudents, it meant the difference
between being able to read the instructions on
their child's medicine or being able to read the
information on a bus or a street sign or to fill
out a job application.
I taught literacy for more than a decade.
I started out teaching adults in the literacy
program and later taught English as a Second
Language (ESL), which was tremendously
difficult and frustrating. I could only imagine
how difficult it must be for my students, who
were already fluent in the language of their
birth but were struggling to learn an entirely
new language.
After that, I taught inside prisons and
in halfway houses for ex-cons. More than
half of all men and women in prison are
functionally illiterate, which means they
cannot read above a fourth-grade level. In
today's society, not being able to read at an
eighth-grade level or more means you can
never get beyond minimum wage. Ever. It
also means you are more likely to end up
in prison.
My most difficult work as a teacher was
the years I spent teaching pregnant teenagers,
trapped by systemic disenfranchisement that
left them angry and surly. They didn't want
to be in class, but to qualify for governmental
assistance they had to a earn high school
equivalency. Half the class time was spent
i'.5
(/)
~-
~
~
:::E
~
~
learning the basics-English, math, historyand then "life-skills;' or as I started to think of
it: how to not spend your entire paycheck on a
sweater when your baby needs diapers.
Even as I was doing these other teaching
jobs, I was also teaching college.The disconnect
was immense. Imagine the difference between
teaching film or literature to college freshman
and sitting in a halfway house with men or
women who are trying desperately not to buy
drugs and teaching them how to read.
I could take my college freshmen to Mr.
Corsaro's secret garden of intellectual enticements. But those hollow-eyed guys in the
halfway house or my surly teens who regularly
sucker-punched me in the hallway? They
needed to be taught the basics they should
have learned years earlier and time was not
on their side. The time to make them love
books and idealize language was lost for them.
Whenever I was with them I wished I had an
IV full of knowledge that I could pump into
them to catch them up to where they could
actually love learning.
After doing it for more than 25 years, I can
say that there is no more political act than
teaching. Take those pregnant girls. I wanted so
much for them. I wanted them to have the Mr.
Corsaro moment I had when I was poor and
surly and angry about everything.
Learning about encoded language taught
me about my own life as a lesbian and as
a woman. A few years later I would meet
Mary Daly and 'ct.is-cover"the buried work of
women writers and artists and historians.
One good teacher gave me the tools to
find my own voice and to give voice to others.
He showed me the power of language. It
ultimately put me in front of the classroom
instead of in it. It opened the door to a world
where queers existed, not just in literature, but
in life. I could then open that door for others.
And so September remains the best month
of the year-the month of new students
and new minds to open. As the heat begins
to abate and the leaves begin to turn, I teach
and I learn, because each new classroom is a
new experience, a new dynamic, a new set of
questions that must be answered.
When we teach, we learn. When we learn,
we teach. If we could all give back just some
of what we have been taught, the world
would be so much less ignorant a place. And
all the doors would open-for everyone. ■
MEET MAYOR PARKER
for an economicboycottof Houston
becauseof yourelection?
YoumeanafterI gotdonelaughing?One
of the mostinterestingthingsthat has
happened
sincemyelectionis theabsolute
onslaught
_ofnationalandinternational
media.Weexpectedto get attention
but it wasmuchbeyondwhatwe had
anticipated.I havebeenan electedofficial
in Houstoncitywidefor 12years.The
factthat I'm a lesbianwasknownin the
campaignandwasdiscussedbut even
with an anti-gayattackat the endof the
campaignit wasn'ta hugeissue.The
responseof Houstonians
wason the order
of,"Weknowthat but canshegetthe
trashpickedup andthe potholesfilled?"
Whenpeoplelookbackonyourterm
of officewhatwouldyoulikethemto
Therearea lotof opinions
aboutthe
sayaboutIt?
significance
of yourelection.Whatdo
youthinkaboutIt?
ThatI dida greatjobin makingthecity
I amconflicted
ontheanswerto this.I really livable,andthatthecitygovernment
havespentmyadultlifeworkinghardto
functioned
at a veryhighlevel.[EdieStul~
advance
thegayandlesbiancommunity
...
andI havebeenawareof thefactthat I
ama rolemodelfor mycommunity.
I have
alwaysconducted
myselfwiththat in
mind.Ontheotherhand,I ranfor mayor
of HoustonbecauseI absolutely
wanted
thejob andbelievedthatI wasthe best
candidate
for mayorof Houston.
Thoseof
uswhocan,havethe responsibility
to live
ourlivesopenlyandhonestlyandthat's
whatmakesthebigadvances.
Whatis thebestpartof thejobsofar?
WhatI loveaboutlocalgovernment
is that
youcanaffectpeople'slivesverydirectly
ona dailybasis.Thebestlocalgovernment
is the oneyouneversee.Youonlynotice
localgovernment
whenwe screwsomethingup.
Hyoucouldwavea wandanddoone
thingforthecityof Houston
what
wouldyouchooseto do?
Trulyit wouldbeto focusonjobsandthe
economy.
I wouldjumpstartoureconomy
andtakethe unemployment
ratedown.We
havesomelong-terminfrastructure
needs.I
campaigned
onthefactthatI wouldfinally
puta comprehensive
floodanddrainage
programin placefor Houston,
notto be
completed
in mymaximum
sixyearsin
office,butto putit in place.
Whatwasyourreactionto Amarillo,
TexaspastorDavidGrlsham's
call
Houston,
TexasMayorAnniseParker
madeheadlinenewslastyearwhenshe
becamethefirstopenlygaymayorof a
U.S.city withovera millionresidents.
Parker,
53,wasbornin Houstonandhas
livedtheremostof herlife.Shegraduated
fromRiceUniversity
in 1978witha
triplemajorin psychology,
sociologyand
anthropology
andthenspent20 years
working
in the oil andgasindustry.A gay
activist
sincecollege,
shelostherfirst
two bidsfor a seaton CityCouncilbut
wonin 1997andwasreelected
twice.She
thenservedthreetermsasHoustonCity
Controller.
MayorParkerandherpartner
of 20 years,KathyHubbard,
livetogether
withtheirtwodaughters.
"Thoseof us who can,
havethe responsibility
to liveour livesopenly
and honestly."
September 2010
I23
SUPERMODELTURNED ACTOR TURNED REALITYTV
REGULAR,JENNY SHIMIZU IS SUDDENLYHOT AGAIN.
~ ~~
,,
[7ZA~UM/J-
PHOTOS BYJENNY RISH-ER--7
J
JENNY SHIMIZU has a crush on someone but she won't
clothes. It's more powerful than a page in a magazine:'
tell you who it is. Who can blame her, since much of the
Since she first arrived in L.A. in the 1980s, Shimizu has
speculation about the pioneering supermodel turned media
consistently been active in performance art, especially art
personality has been about her famous affairs.
pertaining to the queer subculture, a world she feels most
"Hopefully people ar~ tired of reading the same old story
at home in.
[about my sex life]. It's like if you won a race iri first grade and
"Being a member of Queer Nation changed my life,"
people kept bringing it up," says the 43-year old openly gay, Shimizu says, of the direct-action protest group. "It taught
Japanese American model, actor and media icon.
me at a very early age about what people can accomplish by
But if having sex with famous, gorgeous women was a , protesting peacefully and physically putting themselves out
race, Shimizu would be the winner. Among a number of there. Looking back, on the runway [my contribution] was
Hollywood's sexiest women, Shimizu has allegedly shared the
all about visibility for people who don't fit in. The impact was
beds of Ione Skye, Angelina Jolie and Madonna, gaining her
more important than just for me; it was important to reach
the reputation of an androgynous sexual demigod that even queer kids in subcultures or on the fringe," says Shimizu.
gay men seem to desire. Yet despite all of her experiences,
Suddenly hot again, as a series regular on Bravo's Make
Shimizu still says she still has a lot to learn about the ladies.
Me a Supermodel, a guest on numerous reality shows
"My mother says I never have problems getting women ...
including America's Next Top Model and Logo's Curl Girls,
but I'm completely not like that;' says Shimizu, who was a Shimizu never really went away.
college basketball star and garage mechanic as a young adult.
She's made a name for herself in multiple art forms,
'Tm very shy when it comes to women:'
transcending the fashion world to become one of the most
When it comes to her career though, Shimizu knows how
identifiable and inspiring queer faces in Hollywood. She
to say yes. "One day someone asked me to do modeling. I was starred in last year's smash lesbian hit film Itty Bitty Titty
terrified, didn't think I belonged and didn't think I was good
Committee- l 4 years after she starred opposite Angelina
looking," she admits."But I said yes and it took me places-it
Jolie in her first feature film, Foxfire. (Not long after Foxfire
took me everywhere. I have fear as a human being like every- wraped, Jolie came out to Girlfriends magazine about falling
body else but when a door of opportunity opens, I'm going
in love with Shimizu.) In 2007, Shimizu joined the cast of
to be the first to jump through it:'
the queer gothic beach TV series Dante's Cove (playing girlA the time, Shimizu was working as a car mechanic, friend to Michelle Wolff) and most recently starred in the
mt
apt to wear coveralls than couture, but after she was working class drama Bob's New Suit.
di-~vered straddling a motorcycle outside an L.A. club,
"When I was younger, I was getting to know mysel£ Now
and sporting an 8-inch tattoo of a woman with her legs that I'm older and more comfortable in my skin, it's fun to
wrapped around a wrench that reads "Strap-On," Shimizu
play different types of characters," says the actor
said "yes" to modeling.
While Shimizu has somewhat slipped away from the
Calvin and Kelly Klein were stunned when they met her. constant paparazzi attention she once got, she continues to
Shimizu's androgynous looks launched Klein's prominent
produce work she's connected to. She recently began writing
black and white ad campaign for CK One and set the standard
her autobiography, a few years ago she began collaborating
for androgynous models ever since. Since then, she has
with other artists to create her own clothing line and she is
worked with Prada,Jean Paul Gaultier and Versace (among
currently working with Richardson magazine and artist Molly
others), has graced dozens of magazine covers (including
Shiot on a new limited edition graphic tee collection under
Vogue, Glamour, Elle-even curve, 14 years ago), and
the guise of a line called MERCH.
was eventually named one of the 100 Most Powerful Asian
"My universe has died down a bit and I'm glad;' says
Americans by A magazine.
Shimizu, who once traveled the globe with Madonna and
Throughout her journey, Shimizu has been muse to such
was rolling in the kind of cash few models ever get to see. The
prominent photographers as Richard Avedon, Irving Penn,
change, the slow down, was a purposeful choice, she admits.
Bruce Weber and Catherine Opie, and photographs of her
Her new, less flashy life can be summed up by the change
have adorned the walls of the Guggenheim and the Los in the cars the former mechanic drives. "I used to own a
Angeles County Museum of Modern Art.
handcrafted 1985 Mercedes coupe from Germany. Now I'm
"I like the idea of being art," Shimizu says. Adding, "When
really getting into the modern station wagon. I like utility,
something gets shown in a museum, it transcends more
not pomp and circumstance. I'm not flashy. I like anything
than just the outside body of a person standing there with
that serves a purpose. That, to me, is really sexy:' Agreed. ■
September 2010 j 25
THE KIDSARE
[MORETHAN]
ALL RIGHT
Annette Bening and Lisa Cholodenko discuss the breakout film.
ONTHS
BEFORE its theatrical release,
there was already Oscar buzz building for Lisa
Cholodenko's new film, The Kids Are All Right.
While the glistening statue may not be certain,
what is certain is that the film is the largest,budget lesbian
movie ever made (unless you factor in films with marginal
lesbian themes like Mulholland Dr. and The Hours), and that
with Annette Bening and Julianne Moore-both
of whom
have recieved multiple Oscar nods for previous work-as the
leads, it boasts more star power than any lesbian film before.
Cholodenko is best known for directing the indie gems High
Art and Laurel Canyon and while Kids is a more mainstream
movie than her previous films, it still retains the intimate film
making qualities of her other work, a
calculated move by the auteur.
';\fter having made a few films that
were well received-but I think they were considered more
art house films- I wanted to make something personal but
commercial;' explains Cholodenko.
And she succeeded in her mission. The Kids Are All Right
is a beautiful film that reaches across the Indie/Hollywood
chasm and falls in the much beloved category of Little Miss
Sunshi~e and Juno.
The story centers around a family, made up of moms Nie
(Bening),Jules (Moore) and their two children Joni and Laser.
Joni, played brilliantly by up,and,comer Mia Wasikowska, the
star of Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland, turns 18, the age at
which she becomes eligible to contact the man who "fathered"
her through an open donor program.
Enter Mark Ruffalo's character, Paul, a motorcycle,riding,
organic food,cooking, L.A. hipster, and the excitement, both
positive and negative, that he adds to the family equation.
"We found this equilibrium where [Paul] had this dark side
and this arrested side ... that that he was magnetic and he was
charming," says Cholodenko, of the character.
The film explores the changing dynamics of adding an
unexpected family member to the mix. It is the ultimate
"what if" scenario for lesbians electing to use an open donor
program to start a family, and is the first film to answer the
question of what might happen when a kid who was once just
a blip on a sonogram meets the man who was once just a list
of desirable genetic traits in a pamphlet.
Ir was this investigation of the issues that attracted Bening
to the film. "I love that all of those questions are being tested,
not in some idealistic, earnest way, but in kind of an odd, gritty,
uncomfortable at times, funny way;' says Bening, who is filled
with praise for Cholodenko.
"Lisa's very smart about letting people figure out their way,
and kind of take ownership of the characters and the family,
and she doesn't get in the way of thar;' says Bening. She
thought about this for a long time. Thar's so important for me
to keep in mind-the years and years and years it took to find
these little moments, these little details:'
While the plot is compelling and moves at a good clip, it is
the character development that really sets this film apart. Nie
and Jules, despite being played by straight actors, are one of the
most authentic and believable lesbian couples in film history.
"I think they're both pretty evolved people;' says Cholodenko
of the actors. "Even though they are in straight relationships, I
think that wasn't a hard transition for them:'
Bening agrees. "We talked some and we rehearsed some,
but I guess we both felt sort of intuitively that we understood them. I felt that I understood their relationship, based
§' on what was written:' And really, who wouldn't want to play
...J
~ house with either Bening or Moore?
lBening seems tailor-made for her role as Nie, the seemingly
cc
::l uptight, yet vulnerable doctor who struggles the most with
<(
~ Paul's intrusion into the family. "I felt very comfortable with
~ Nic's skin, in her skin," says the actor.
~
Bening also delivers a brilliant comic performance. In one
I
~ scene, she awkwardly tries to explain to her son why she and
~ Jules prefer to watch gay male porn rather than lesbian. In
~ another, she lets her guard down and joyfully loses herself in
z
~ singingJoni Mitchell.
~
Cholodenko says she handpicked Bening for her capacity
to juggle vulnerability and comedy. "Just recalling scenes from
~ American Beauty, and her ability to be dramatic and kind of
g
§? straight and then hilarious, was something that's rare. You don't
;;- see that ability in actors a lor;' says the director.
w
Q While Bening came onto the project later in the game,
~ Moore was attached to it from the beginning. Cholodenko
\!i had met her years earlier at a dinner and Moore, who is known
~ for taking risks on indie films, dared the director to write her a
z
~ part."We had a funny conversation and Julianne said,'Oh, you
know, you should write something for me sometime: And she
~ was serious," says Cholodenko.
~w
The part of Jules is a great fit for Moore, who plays the
~ openhearted-if somewhat fumbling-character to perfection.
~ There's a real playfulness to her character and even when she
falters, you want to pick her up. "I love that she's looking, and
that she's not quite sure what she needs," says Bening, who
pauses and then adds, "I find that really endearing:'·
And that's a great word to describe the film as a whole.
This isn't a sexy film and even by Cholodenko's own words,
it's not a political film, bur it's an endearing, bittersweet
and authentic story that subtly and effectively erodes the
argument against same-sex parenting (and marriage for that
matter) by showing a family that's hard not to identify with.
And perhaps there's nothing more political than showing
how similar we all are. ■
"I think they're both pretty evolved people,"
says Cholodenko of the actors. "Even
though they are in straight relationships, I
think that wasn't a hard transition for them."
a
i
I
On set with the family
(top to bottom):
Dinner with the full
cast; the two moms,
Bening and Moore;
Cholodenko (middle)
with the stars
September 2010
I31
, why would you ever leave L
To help fight the heat, I like to spend my days in or near a pool.
Luxor is the first hotel to market to the gay community, and
they host the "Temptation Sundays" pool party, which caters
mostly to gay men, but still offers some nice eye candy for us
gals. During Las Vegas Pride, Luxor also collaborates with the
Women's Empowerment Network to host "Get Wet;' an
all-women pool party.
Kitty Dip at Tao Beach in the Venetian is a lesbian-focused
event that tends to be a little less crowded than the Luxor. If
you're looking for something even more relaxing, head over to
Mandalay Bay for sandy beaches, palm trees and a tranquil
tropical atmosphere. Dubbed "Mandalay Gay" by the locals,
it's not infrequent to see scantily clad girls engaged in heavy
petting in the private cabanas.
The pool parties are only foreplay, however, for the sexually
charged evening entertainment to come. Well worth their
ticket price, the Cirque du Soleil shows will blow your mind
and Zumanity is especially titillating. Located in the New
York, New York hotel, Zumanity features glorious naked
acrobats, gender bending eroticism and a remarkable girl-ongirl act, in a fish tank, that borders on pornography.
After the shows get you worked up, head out to one
of the many clubs that cater to the Sapphic scene. Booty
Bar, a monthly event at the Bootlegger Copa Room, is well
worth planning your travel around. However, the most
popular lesbian night is Saturday at Krave in the Planet
Hollywood hotel.
If you're looking for something a little more low-key, try
Down at Ghostbar, an indoor-outdoor lounge on top of the
Palms Hotel, or better yet Freezone, which hosts the longest
running drag show in Vegas and offers a Tuesday Ladies Night.
The Gold Lounge at the Aria Hotel also hosts an LGBT night
on Thursdays, but it tends to have more men than women.
When you're ready to crash, do so at the Wynn hotel, or
Wynn's "little sister;' Encore, which is my favorite luxury hotel
on the strip. With the most Forbes five-star restaurants in
Vegas, Wynn and Encore offer special pampering packages
designed for the gay traveler and a dedicated LGBT concierge
who will cater to your every decadent need.
If you're looking for something a bit closer to the action
(and a bit less expensive) try Harrah's casino or its neighboring
sister hotel Paris. Both are located in the middle of the strip
and offer reasonably priced rooms, but I prefer Paris' painted
ceilings and romantic atmosphere over Harrah's nice, yet less
exciting interior.
When hunger hits, scarf down some of the world-class
buffets offered all over town. From jiggling green goop to
lobster and champagne, there's a buffet for every palate and
Zumanityfeaturesglorious
naked acrobats,gender
bendingeroticismand a
remarkablegirl-on-girlact, in a fish
tank, that borderson pornography.
wallet. The Harrah's casino chain offers an all-access pass to
every one of its buffets for one low price, making it by far the
best dining plan on the strip.
Well worth the drive off the strip, the M Resort has the
best luxury buffet in town, featuring live-action cooking
demonstrations and a seafood feast to die for. Best of all, it's
a good $15 cheaper than its strip buffet counter-parts. While
you're out there, check out the M's Villagio Bar, located poolside and offering splendid views overlooking the strip.
After you are good and full, head to one of the many hotel
spas to wash away last night's sins and rejuvenate before you
do it all again. Like everything else at Wynn, the spa offers
decadent pampering including body treatments, airbrush
tanning and, my favorite, couples massages. Book early, or
buy a treatment with a hotel package, and the prices are
relatively affordable.
If you're looking to go green, Aria Hotel-a part of
CityCenter, the largest private sustainable development in
the world-boasts an eco-friendly spa offering organic skin
treatments and en suite services that don't even require leaving
your spectacular room.
Best of all, every hotel mentioned here, and its parent
company, boasts a 100 rating on the HRC Equality Index
and supports LGBT rights, which makes me happy to
support them in return. For more information on what
Las Vegas has to offer you for business and pleasure, go to
visitlasvegas.com. ■
September 2010
I33
NOT JUST FOR SPRINGBREAK
Why Cancun is an ideal lesbian destination. By Diane Anderson-Minshall
Yucatan
loveliness:
(top) the
thatched roof
umbrellas
along the
beach. Bottom
(from left):
underwater
scenescapes;
women at the
Olivia games;
a hottie that
makes us think
of From Here
to Eternity
34
I curve
Since our generally empty bank account required a rather
arduous flight itinerary-Portland,
Ore. to Phoenix to
Mexico City to Cancun-I planned for us to arrive at Club
Med Cancun Yucatan a day before the other Olivia travelers
swarmed in. That first night, as visitors slowly trickle in, there's
a sense that all of Club Med is ours.
Nestled between a lagoon and the Caribbean Sea, the resort
is built on a private peninsula so the haciendas we are staying in
are surrounded by gorgeous aquamarine and turquois water on
one side, and a no-swim jungle-like crocodile-friendly lagoon
on the other.
We wander the lands, encountering iguanas and lizards
sunning themselves, thatched roof beach umbrellas overlooking a quiet coast and pelican~ dive-bombing for fish,
just inches from our gorgeous beachfront that never seems
crowded. There are birds and i~anas and wildlife nearly every
where we turn (but thankfully, we saw no mosquitos).
This trip is my third with Olivia, the lesbian travel
company now celebrating its 20th anniversary of travel, but
it's my first at a resort. I have grown to love the cruises, but
something about being on a land-based resort for a solid week
underscores some of the difficulties of being on the boat. I
want to track down every single woman who previously told
me that they couldn't'clo" cruises (sea sick, claustrophobic, too
much walking, too restrictive) and shout from the ocean-view
balcony of my room, "Olivia Resorts rule!"
I'm a convert, once again. Everything about the cruises
that can be a little restrictive is solved in a make-your-ownfun absolutely all-inclusive resort vacation. There is snorkeling,
sailing, waterskiing, wakeboarding, beach soccer and volleyball, water polo, kayaking, aquafitness, yoga, dance classes,
bocce ball, ping pong and-wait for it-a flying trapeze and
circus school-all free, lessons included. I never thought I'd
go to Mexico, to the beach no less, to learn to walk a tightrope
and fly through the air on a trapeze, but damn if it doesn't
make sense once I'm there.
Booze was free, which meant I had a pifia colada in my
hands at all time, and since, unlike the boats, I didn't have to
worry about port calls at 7 a.m., I could sleep in. I drank my
weight in frozen cocktails that week.
Another joy of being on
resort time is the absolute
freedom to sleep when you want
(siestas were a must for us) and
eat when and where you want.
At the buffet style La Hacienda,
we pile on the fresh tropical fruit
and feast on Mexican specialties
every day (I'm still dreaming of
their breakfast chilaquiles weeks
later). At another of the resort's
~
~
~
i
w
~
~0
~
g
~
z
g
~
~LL
~
~
~
SPECIAL
ADVERTISING
PROMOTION
Best Lesbian
Resort Vacations
Around the Globe
Beloved
for itsserenewhitebeaches
andsoothing
surf,you'llsoonseewhythepristine,
secluded
Columbus
Isle,Bahamas
is oneof Olivia's
favoriteoases.
Tucked
alongtheshoresof
Bonefish
Bayontheislandof SanSalvador,
theresort'sbungalow-style
buildings
aresurrounded
bya privatewhitesandbeach.
Yourwell-appointed
roomwill havea soothing
oceanor peace(u1
tree-lined
gardenview.Remember,
yourfood,mostdrinks,mostactivities
andallyourOlivia
entertainment
areincluded,
including
showsfromfiveofthetopfemalecomicsintheU.S.:
MicheleBalan,Sandra
Valls,MargaGomez,
JulieGoldman
andDanaGoldberg.
Punta Cana Paradise Resort • May 7-14,2011
ClubMed'sPuntaCanaResortis nestledbetweenwhitesandybeaches
anda magnificent
coconut
grove.Theresortis situatedon75 acresontheeasterntip of Hispaniola
Island,between
the
Caribbean
SeaandtheAtlanticOcean.
Thisresortfeaturesa newfull-service
spa,oceanfront
suiteswithprivateinfinitipool,upgraded
rooms,restaurants
andbars.PuntaCanaParadise
is
all-inclusive-thatmeansall meals,beverages
(extrachargefor champagne
andpremiumliquors)
andmostsportingactivitiesareincluded.Weevencomegetyouat theairportandbringyouto the
club.Bestbet:Explore
thebeautifulbluewaters-go sailing,takea snorkeling
trip,try kayaking
or
simplyrelaxonthesun-drenched
beaches
alongwithlesbians
fromaroundtheglobe.
Palm Springs Spa Escape • October 13-17,2010
Relaxandrejuvenate
withthewomenof Oliviaat the#1 resortspaintheU.S.(according
to CondeNastTraveler).
Thiselegantescapeis trulya retreatforthemindandbody.The
private,spacious
andgracefully-appointed
Miramonte
boastsanaward-winning
spa;two
18-holechampionship
golfcourses,
threepoolsandjacuzzisandfresh,seasonal
Galifomia
cuisine.
Whether
yourpleasure
is tennis,golf,spatreatments,
hotair ballooning,
shopping
or
takinga tourof thestars'homes,ourPalmSpringsSpaEscape
is indeed"paradise
found."
JazzsingerSweetBabyJ'ai entertains
andyou'llbejoinedbya bevyof athletes,
including
golfsuperstar
RosieJones,Hallof FarnerDianaNyad,Olympic
trainerBonnieStollandtennis
proRosieCasals.
More Luxury Lesbian Vacations
:.,
~.
. .., ,,,, ...
r
_.
,~~
.
Alaska Cruise
Discover China
May I 5-22, 20 I I
June 24-July 5, 20 I I
Barcelona to
Rome Cruise
July 2-9, 2011
-
~
From European riverboat cruises, to Alaska
adventures, to African safaris and Mexican
Riviera escapes, Olivia has a trip for lesbians
of every age, as well as special programs for
solo travelers and women of color .
~
olivia
20 gears of lesbian travel• olivia.com
www.olivia.com
800-631-6277
restaurants, a more
formal Las Cazuelas,
we feast on lobster
tail with goat cheese
risotto that's so good
we literally write home
about it.
That first quiet night as were exploring the
resort by ourselves, we find hammocks off
in the distance, strung between palm trees. I
flop into one and immediately flip over. Is it
my size or lack of coordination? My co-pilot,
trying to assuage my obvious shame, comes
to me but does the same. Two more tries and
we're down in the sand atop each other, in the
middle of the night, below the hammocks,
laughing and holding each other. I hear wildlife noises in the distances and the whole
moment feels like that scene in From Here to
Eternity. Except, you know, queer.
The Olivia energy is alive and well at this
Club Med resort vacay. One day there's the
Olivia Olympics, where teams of lesbians do
beachside games to anoint winners (curve's
own Kathy Belge, aka Dipstick, is among the
jocks who score, while I watch from below
my beach umbrella, pifia colada in hand).
Every day there are pool games and water
aerobics that attracted dozens of women. The
water, instructors are tall, dark and handsome
Caribbean men, but to be sensitive to our
desire to have women teach us and add levity
to the seriously high-energy throbbing DJ
beats-style pool workouts, they dress in drag,
water balloons tucked beneath jog bras. The
lesbians in the pool love it. But I watch from
my lounge chair, pifia colada in hand.
Many Olivia women go on day excursions.
There are Mayan ruins ofTulum and underground rivers at Xcaret and dophins you can
swim with. Some rent cars at the resort and
drive down the Riviera, others take boats to
Cozumel or Isle Mujeres (the isle of women).
Each night, there is dancing at one of the
three bars. Special events abound. Theres even
a Dating Game (three butchlerettes and one
femme who we send on a date, chaperoned by
Dipstick). I'm not sure if they hit it off or not,
but I can tell you that the women in the room
next to us sure do. One day they have sex for
eight hours; I _knowthis because the women
seems to yelp like a puppy during the act. I
need an extra pifia colada that day just to get
through my siesta.
Cancun is gorgeous, though on hotel rowliterally a strip of hotels along a peninsula-I
can see that Club Med, on the southernmost
edge, offers something more. It combines
the feel of a high-end Euro resort with real
Mexico. At Las Cazuelas, a restaurant with
a giant thatched roo£ birds fly in and out of
the restaurant while we dine. In America, this
would lead to a lot of shooing and screaming
and probably a restaurant manager with a
giant broom trying not to violate the safety
codes. Here the wait staff seems unconcerned
by them. The waiters speak little English but
still cobble together enough to tell jokes, like,
"Remember, if you don't like dinner, you don't
have to pay for it;' which of course, is funny
because the resort is all-inclusive and you've
already paid for it. Those jokes get me going,
if only because I've had several more pifia
coladas before dinner.
The resort is environmentally-friendly,
with a focus on eco-toursim. Snorkeling is
literally 50 feet from my door, so I spend a
good chunk of my week underwater, circling
the coral reefs to look at ocean life that's so
vibrant and jeweled that even weeks later
I'm at a loss for how to describe it. Since I'm
sunburned on day one and my hair is a wreck
from the ocean salts, I rush to the Club Med
store to find more sunscreen and a bottle of
hair conditioner. Not grasping the exchange
rate, I end up paying $50 for those two items.
The boutiques at Club Med are not part of
the all-inclusive package.
But of course, I'm surrounded by gorgeous
frolicking lesbians, on the pristine Mayan
Riviera, with another pifia colada in my
gullet, so I forget all about that one ridiculous
purchase and just dive back into the blue.
green waters, where I want to stay forever. ■
flf
~
a:
g
!:!:,
[;j
~
d:i
g
u..
lA.p-c~ose-a""'d-per-so""'aL
Wt..th ;;Los Ar-cos"
CeLebr-ate
::2.0 t1ear-sof
firaveLwi.t'1oLi.vi.a.,
TH6 Lea~ey
i.~ Lesbi.a&&
<:::;r-&rb
r,olA.r-flip-flops
&rvt,~r,olA.r-sar-o""'g, &rvt,~
viop o""'bo&rr-~OlA.rMexic&r""' 'Ri.vier-&rCruise
(M&rr-cvi=:2.6-Apr-iL=:2.,~011) w[tn 1()00
Woll\.te""'!
FREE
PaymentPlan!
Bookyour lesbian
dream vacationtoday!
(BOO}631-6277 • olivia.com/curvetove
As low as
$207 pp/month
olivi
™
CST#1009281040
ALLABOARD
Adventure and romance on the rails. By Lauren Marie Fleming
"Grab your passport and follow me;' Laurel whispered in
my ear. She didn't need to be so quiet. We were probably
the only ones around who spoke English, but fear forced
us into secrecy.
The man across the train car-the one who had just pulled
a gun on us-asked where we were going. "To get food;' my
best friend replied in the calmest Russian she could.muster,
and he let us pass.
Less than an hour into our overnight trek across eastern
Ukraine, a young self-identified mobster from Odessa pointed
a pistol at us and, staring me in the eye, pulled the trigger.
He would later tell Ukrainian police that he was just flirting
with us, but when he cackled, cocked his gun again and put it
back in the holster, nothing could convince me to spend our
12-hour journey anywhere near this man.
The train attendants were reluctant at first to believe two
American girls-then thought we were "crying wolf" -but a
call to the Peace Corps headquarters where Laurel worked,
soon got us a police escort for the rest of our journey.
This is the only bad experience I've ever had on a train.
From my first 30-minute ride through San Diego, to the
trip I took last month through the Pacific Northwest, I have
found train travel to be gleefully exhilarating. Where others
see tracks with limited destinations, I see a journey with limitless freedoms.
I have dined on five-course meals traveling through wine
country, watched the snow-capped Alps while playing cards
38
Icurve
and chatted in five languages while passing under the English
Channel, all on trains.
My first girlfriend and I fell in love traveling through Italy
on trains. I still remember the moment at the Varenna Esino
station that I looked into her eyes and realized everything
between us was about to change. We held hands as we rode
through the mountain passes from Lake Como to Florence,
and that evening I made love to a woman for the first time.
Two years later, alone and lost, I boarded my third train of
the day, attempting to get to Hruba Skala, a famous castle on a
hill in the northern Czech Republic. My only companion was
SAVOR QUALITY
TIME
AND EXPERIENCE
A
TASTE
OFCHICAGO
With service to over 500 destinations nationwide, our welcoming onboard environment is just as
important as our cozy seats, beautiful views and great food. Enjoy the journey..
VISIT AMTRAK.COM
•y
----
Amtrak ts a registered service mark of the National Railroad PassengerCorporation.·
AIVlTRAK
9
Enjoy the journey.s•
SEEINGCANADABY RAIL
Oceanis likethe OrientExpress-a
super-luxury
train.TheQuebecOntarioCorridorofVIARailhas
fabulousservicebecauseit is also
a commuterrail lineandstops
frequentlywithinall the maincities
fromMontrealto Toronto.
All trainsin Canadahave
coachseats,whichareincredibly
comfortable.
Forlongtrips,sleeper
carsareavailable.
Thesecanbe
pricey,butif youwantto lie right
downor takea shower,this is the
wayto go.
Oh,Canada!
Theycall it the "world
Therearevariousdiscounts,
nextdoor,"andthat couldnotbe
however,
depending
onyour
moreaccurate.
Wishyoucouldgo
destination
and
the
length
of your
to France?
Vivele Quebec!
Yearning
trip.Seniorsalwaysget1Opercent
for London?
Torontois amazingly
off,asdopeoplebetween18and25
similar.Wantthat combination
of
(youhaveto requestthesediscounts,
countryandcity with a temperate
however).
Studentscangetmajor
climate?That'sVancouver.
Feel
discounts
of
upto 35 percent,
likewinterin thesummer?
Trythe
ontheirdestination.
hinterlands
of Saskatchewan.
Liketo depending
is the peak
ski mostof theyearbut can'tafford AprilthroughSeptember
seasonin Canada.
Off-season
rates
theAlps?Whistleris magnificent.
will belower.
NeverseenNiagaraFalls?It is far
A CanRailpasswill takeyoumost
granderonthe Canadian
side.The
in Canadain economy
RockyMountains
areamazingwhen everywhere
class.Thisprovides12 daysof
yougo rightthroughthem.Nova
comfortable
classtravelin a 3OScotiareallyis like Scotland,but
day
period.
Large
citiesalsohave
with betterweather.
commuterrail linesthat will let you
Canada
is alsooneof theworld's
travelwithincity limits.
safestcountries.
Halfthebottled
All rail travelrequiressome
waterin Americacomesfromthere,
registration.Don'texpectto just
soyouknowit's safeto drink,
buya ticket andhopa train. If you
andyouwon'tneeda travelvisa
go via Amtrak,for example,you
or vaccinations.
A countrywhere
everyone
speaksEnglish(Frenchand mustregisterup to five daysin
advance,dependingon whereyou
Englishin Quebec)
is alwayseasier
to travelthroughfor mostAmericans. aredepartingfrom.
Therearesomeminordownsides
Andthere'salsotheperkthat
to traintravel,astherearewith
Canadians
embraced
queersages
ago,soyoucouldalwaysgetmarried air travel.Trainsin Canadacanbe
delayeddueto freighttransport,
thereif themoodstrikesyou.
whichhasrail prioritythere.
Thereis nobetterwayto see
Butunlikebeingtrappedin an
Canada
thanbyrail.ThePolarBear
airport,waitingfor a train is rarely
Express
through"the
near-Arctic
unpleasant.
At yourdeparturepoint,
regionsof Canada
is amazing.
The
youcanusuallygetan estimateon
yourwaittime,andyoucansightsee
in the interim.
A traintrip to Canada
is,without
question,
a trulymemorable
vacation
in oneof the mostunderestimated
andoverlooked
countriesin the
world:beautiful,friendlyandsafe,
andthe perfecttrip for single,
lesbianscouplesor a groupof
friends.[Victoria
A.Brownworth]
40
Icu
ve
Sven, a pocket;size ceramic gnome, and I took pictures of him
and the red;and;white;striped Czech train cars in an attempt
to keep myself from crying in frustration. Yet no matter how
lost I got, once I was actually on the train I could always count
on the lulling clickity;clack of the wheels on the tracks to ease
my worries and calm me into a zenlike state of happiness.
And if the rocking of the train car doesn't work, I can read,
write or play cards, all things that would normally make me
extremely sick on any other form of wheeled transportation.
On this journey to Hrubi Skala, I chose to study my Czech,
so that by the time I finally made it to the castle on the hill,
I was able to order a well;deserved ice cream cone without
using a word of English.
A week later, I stood at that same confusing train station
eating kielbasa sausages, drinking the best beer ever and
listening to Cechomor, a band I was beginning to love. In a
stroke of brilliance, the band had bought an old red;and;white
Czech steam engine and taken it on tour, traveling from
station to station, playing on preset stages -to the crowds
that filled the train yards.
Part of the allure of trains is that ability to wander
through the cars, people;watch on your way to get food,
use the bathroom, or, if you're on the bullet train in Japan,
Where others see tracks with limited
destinations,I see a journeywith
limitlessfreedoms.
see just how fast you are going. Even though I had to walk
through toxic;cloud;filled smoking cars, my 15;year;old
self couldn't resist repeatedly checking on our speed. We
were going as fast as an airplane and from that moment on
I had no idea why anyone would ever fly when they could
take a train.
Back in die United States, I use Amtrak as much as posible
and know more fascinating details about my country because
of it. For example, did you know that there is both a Little
Dirty Creek and a Big Dirty Creek between Eugene and
Portland, Ore. r
I didn't, until I parked my car and took the train. ■
c3
~
~
~
f
hl
~
~
~
u.
w
~
:E
~
~
RIDINGTHE RAILSAGAIN
The unconventional reasons I love Amtrak. By Jennifer Parello
It's day three of my train trip from Chicago to San
Francisco and I've been jolted awake again by one of
the sudden, mysterious stops that have put us 12 hours
behind schedule.
I climb over the netting that is designed to keep riders
from falling out of their ·bunks and make my way to my
private bathroom. It's a small, stainless steel room (probably
not unlike the type used to hose down inmates in an insane
asylum). The showerhead is placed directly above the toilet.
I shudder at the sight, and wistfully transport myself to the
five-star hotel awaiting me at journey's end. Private sleeper
cars on Amtrak have perks: fresh linens and towels, bottled
water, free newspapers, an attendant, room service. But they
do not have the bathroom of my dreams.
My stomach growls. I made the mistake of taking a late
dinner seating, by which time the dining car had run out of
food. So I retreat to the bar car and grab a bag of pretzels
and a couple of beers.
I climb back into my bunk and giggle. I'm filthy, hungry
and trapped on a train in the middle of nowhere, with no
idea of when or if I'll ever arrive at my destination. And I
couldn't be happier.
I'm an impatient person, and I get anxious if I'm not on
time. I have never been camping and refuse to stay in anything less than a four-star hotel. Yet, in spite of all this, I also
love Amtrak.
, I travel a lot for work, and spend most of my week on
airplanes. Although you can usually count on planes to get
you where you're going quickly and on time, there is no dignity in air travel. You are treated little better than livestock. I'm
sure if the TSA would allow it, airline staff would happily use
cattle prods to keep you moving up the gangway. The airlines'
crowded conditions and general lack of civility have given
rise to a dehumanizing culture that prevents you from even
making eye contact with the person sharing your armrest.
So, whenever I can, I take Amtrak. Once you board the
train, time stands still. You are trapped for days with a weird
collection of fellow travelers, bound by sketchy food, erratic
scheduling, insouciant porters and public health threats from
close.proximity. Like strangers trapped on a deserted island,
you have no choice but to form alliances and figure out a way
to survive together.
In addition to women like mysel£ the population of my
current train trip can be broken down into four categories:
+
+
the Amish
recently released convicts
+
+
senior citizens
conservative Republicans
I tended to gravitate to the Amish and convicts.
I'm absolutely fascinated by the Amish, but, then again,
who isn't? The fact that they want nothing to do with me only
~ makes me love them more. On this trip, I've been smitten with
~ an Amish woman who is often huddled in the corner of the
>
~
S
observation car, hoarding snack food. She eats it compulsively,
stuffing chips into her mouth while staring blankly out the
window. When she finally runs out of snacks, I slowly push a
bag of Fritos across the table, in the same way you would try
to lure a suspicious squirrel with a chestnut. As soon as I turn
my head, she snatches the bag and scurries away.
The former prisoners are lots of fun and can be found in
the bar at all hours. A lot of trains, they tell me, aren't all that
different from prison-same food, same long, pointless hours,
same soulless martinets who often use their limited power to
make our lives miserable.
No one on this train knows me or
expects anything of me ... For this brief,
glorious respite, I am unreachable.
We are supposed to reach California sometime tomorrow.
This evening in the bar car, when I ask an engineer what time
we'll arrive, he says cheerfully, "Your guess is as good as mine.
What's your hurry, anywayt
And just as I am about to get on my high horse, and
lecture him on what an important person I am, I catch sight
of myself in the mirror behind the bar. My hair is greasy and
sticking out at odd angles. I am dressed in a ratty T-shirt and
holding a beer. Behind me, my new friend Rusty is shuffling
cards and waiting for me to return to our gin game.
No one on this train knows me or expects anything of
me. There is no cell phone- service, no Internet. For this brie£
glorious respite, I am unreachable. And where else in this world
can you make that claim? I ease into my club chair and pick up
my cards. "You're right;' I say.'Tm in no hurry at all:' ■
REHOBOTHBEACH,DELAWHERE?
Discovering this gay seaside town. By Fay Jacobs
Scenes from
Rehoboth:
beach walker,
gay dining
and directions
to gay Camp
Rehoboth
42
Icurve
Generations of U.S. legislators and their staffers have called
it "The Nation's Summer Capital" because it has long been
a seaside escape from sweltering D.C., but since the 1980s
Rehoboth Beach has been strengthening its claim to a new
title: "The Nation's Lesbian Getaway:'
More and more, the ladies are gathering, vacationing
and moving to Rehoboth. What's not to love:' Rehoboth
sits right along the Atlantic Coast and constitutes one
delightful square mile of beach cottages, expansive homes
and sparkling water. My spouse and I arrived by powerboat
from Washington, D.C., for a summer weekend in '94 and
never really left, morphing from visitors to property owners
to "locals" in a whirl.
In our tiny town, beach and boardwalk connect eateries
and gourmet restaurants (many gay,owned) including the
pioneering Back Porch, which sparked a gay incursion when it
opened back in 1974. The Blue Moon soon followed and the
transformation of Rehoboth into a contemporary and sophis,
ticated gay resort was off and running. Today, Rehoboth is a
treasured stop on the foodie circuit, offering everything from
gourmet cuisine to beach fries, and that includes vegetarian
sushi, all kinds of seafood and saltwater taffy.
Lodging includes high,rise hotels, Victorian and beach,
chic B&Bs (several are women,owned, like Delaware Inn
and The Homestead), a huge number of rental cottages and
condos. From upscale to funky, Rehoboth has it all. And
plenty of gay,gal realtors can help you find exactly what
you're looking for.
Exceptional gay,owned and gay,friendly shops lure visitors
from metro D.C., Philadelphia, Pittsburgh and beyond.
A recent multimillion,dollar revitalization of Rehoboth
Avenue has made sure that visitors get charming architecture
to go with their requisite hot dogs and funnel cakes.
S1,1mmermornings, before hitting the beach, my partner
and I sip java at Lori's Oy,Vey Cafe in the courtyard at
the LGBT Community Center along very gay Baltimore
Avenue. Then it's off to Gordon's Pond-our mostly women's
beach-where I hold a book but never actually finish a page
of text. There's way too much eye candy.
Sunbathers of all body types, ages and personalities
generously co,mingle on the beach here. Children of the
'gayby boom'' abound, and pooches are welcome in most
places. Flying Frisbees, volleyball and.conversations abound,
as restaurant emissaries traverse the sand with leaflets hawking
dances and celebrity DJs at our watering holes later that night.
Each spring, Rehoboth holds a Women's Fest, with nationally
known entertainers, a rockin' tea dance, classes, gol.£ happy
hours, girl parties and so much more.
Rehoboth's gay history actually began much earlier,
when Tallulah Bankhead and other starlets played at the
DuPont mansion here in town, and local women painters
became known both for their canvases and for their very
close friendships.
More and more, the ladies are
gathering, vacationing and moving to
Rehoboth. What's not to love?
When gays descended in the '80s, a backlash saw bumper
stickers screaming, "Keep Rehoboth a Family Town!" Now,
with lots of gay businesses helping Rehoboth through tough
economic times, the town is very happy to welcome all
kinds of families.
Women love to gather at happy hour on Friday nights (and
throughout the week, too) at Cloud 9 or Frogg Pond, and then
enjoy marvelous food and drink, trivia contests and karaoke at
women,owned Seafood Shack or Mixx.
There's lot:s of live entertainment, with popular enter,
tainers like Viki Dee, Mama's Black Sheep and One Love
ramping up the amps all over town. Throughout the
year, big,name entertainers like Kate Clinton, Suzanne
Westenhoefer, Judy Gold, Suede and Sweet Baby J'ai stop
by for sold,out concerts.
BESTPLACETO WRITEYOUR NOVEL
Summer Saturdays, I walk from one art opening to
another, many featuring women artists, often winding
up, Cosmo in hand, with hundreds of gays and lesbians
on the patio of The Blue Moon or Aqua Grill. Plans
are finalized for attending book signings, neighborhood
parties and fundraisers, or for dining out or doing some
laid-back grazing along the boardwalk.
The LGBT organization CAMP (Create A More
Positive) Rehoboth-born
to combat anti-gay attitudes
and now positively impacting the whole communitysponsors huge dance party fundraisers on the Fourth of
July and Labor Day.
Throughout the summer and all year long, CAMP
hosts women's events and keeps the community in
the loop with its award-winning magazine, Letters
from CAMP Rehoboth. Ladies 2000, the legendary
promoters from New Jersey, have fallen in love with
Rehoboth and produce huge women's dance parties
here as well. There's always something to do and fun and
interesting women to meet.
Despite four seasons of weather, Rehoboth is a
year-round beach town. The outdoor lifestyle of
summer cedes to fall's Independent Film Fest (with an
astonishing number of lesbian films) and Jazz Festival,
wild holiday shopping (no sales tax) and a New Year's
women's dinner dance at the Convention Center.
Did I mention the gorgeous scenery? Rehoboth is
a photographer's paradise, with amazing water and
boardwalk views and wildlife for anyone who enjoys the
digital camera quest.
Our hometown crowd is a seamless blend of
Delaware locals and a burgeoning number of LGBT
retirees (or wannabe retirees like myself), who decide
to spend the last of their working years dialing back
on their careers and doing something rewarding in
a place they love. Bye-bye corporate drag and nasty
commutes-hello
Pride and joy in "Gayberry R.F.D:'
Our weekend visitors number hundreds of young
women, many couples but just as many singles, in
search of love. We've been known to host frantic
and very successful lesbian speed-dating sessions,
Olympic-worthy women's beach volleyball and fourwheel-drive spins along the shore for beach fishing
(li<;en~esrequired but they're easy to obtain).
For gals with a passion for boating there are sport
boats, pontoon crafts and fast-and-furious wave runners
for rent, along with charter fishing if you're a really
serious fisher-woman.
From pinball arcades and dolphin watching
to dazzling cuisine and a colossal gay sensibility,
Rehoboth might be an unexpected place to visit, but
spend some quality time here and you'll never say
"Delawherer'' again. ■
FayJacobs is the author of As I Lay Frying:A Rehoboth
BeachMemoir.
Thedriveto ShaktiCoveCottages-a
littlesliceof lesbian-owned
paradise
onthe LongBeachPeninsula
of the
Washington
coast-is onlya few hours
fromPortland,
Ore.
OnthewayupI dothethingsI oftendo
in thecar:holda phonemeetingwith my
publisher,
illegallytexttheofficewhile
driving,checkmyTwitterfeedat stop
signsandrepeatedly
listento myfavorite
roadtrip song,MelissaEtheridge's
"You
CanSleepWhileI Drive."
I pulloversixtimesto writedown
storyideas,twiceto snapphotosat
sceniclookoutsandonceto checkout
the localCountryStore.Sufficeit to say,
I amnotin relaxation
mode.Butall that
changesassoonas I getto mycabin.
ShaktiCoveis a seriesof 1Olittle
one-room'5Osstylecoastalcottages
that aren'tprimitive(theyhave1Vs,
stovesandnice,butsmallbathrooms)
butareby no meansthe luxuryresort
cabanasyoufind otherplaces.But,
again,this is theWashington
coastwherecrabfests,clamdiggingand
dogsplayingFrisbeeonthe beachare
morecommonthanhautecuisineand
typicaltouristactivities.Eachcottage
hasits owntheme:I'm in Goddess,
whichis adornedwith womenfromthe
ageswhoembodythat ethos.There
arehandmade
soapsin the bathrooms,
old guestjournalsandvideosyoucan
checkoutat nocost.
Thecottageshavebeenheredecades,
andsomefolksreturnhereyearafter
year.Theywritein journalskeptin the
cottagesandthestoriesarefilledwith
lesbianloveandlossandeverything
in between.Oneentry,writtenonthe
daytheWorldTradeCentercamedown,
bringschills:"Nothingcouldtakeaway
thepainandgriefof whathappened
today... butbeinghereat Shaktihelped
lessenourangerandbringaboutcalm
andconnectedness
andasyearspass
andpeopleaskwherewereyouwhen
terrorstruck,we'll countourblessings
andsaywewereat the mostlovely
placeonearth."
Onewomanfoundclosurein the
Angelcottageafterherpartnerof 18
yearsdied-a hotrodderwhocame
upannuallyfor a localcarshow.His
motherbroughthisashesto placebelow
thetreeoverlooking
a sloughonthe
propertyandin the oceanthat'sa five-
minutewalkacrossthe dunes.
It's nearthis peacefulplacewhereI
sinkquicklyintoa peacefulmeditative
state.ThebookI haven'tbeenableto
startbecauseof six monthsof writer's
blockcomesflowingoutof mewithinan
hourof myarrival.
Theotherresidentshere-a lesbian
couplein their 7Os,two lesbiansin their
3Os,a straightcouplewith two dogs,
a motherandherkids-are whisper
quietandthe placeis so safethat
the cottagesaren'tevenlocked.It's a
lesbian-ownedretreatprimarilyfor
lesbians,but welcomingto everyone
who respectsit. Dogsaren't just
allowed,theyarepreferred.All Shakti
furnishingsarecoveredin dog-friendly
throws,anddogshavetheir owntowels
in the laundryroom.
I canseewhyonelesbiancouple
saysthey'vebeencomingto Shakti
oncea monthsincetheygottogether13
yearsago:it's seemsthe easiestplace
to shutout everythingbut eachother.
Forme,I spendmy dayswritingand
returningto thosewetlands,nevereven
venturingthat briefwalkto the coast,
becauseI'm contentandcreativein the
Shaktibubble,a peacefulatmosphere
that I neverexperience
at home.
Later,as I eatandwrite amonga
groveof trees,I watchasthe womanin
the cottagenextto megivesherkite to
a little boywhois alsovisitingShakti,a
strangerwhois thrilledto playwith it all
dayonthe beach.Thatnighthe comes
backwithoutit andI overhearhim ask
herhowmuchit costto replace.
"Whensomeonegivesyousomething
youdon'taskaboutthe cost,"shetells
him."Youconsiderthat a gift fromthe
universe,a signthatthat gift is meantto
bewith younow,to enrichyourlife.Just
cherishit."
It is a perfect,pricelesssentiment
for time spentat ShaktiCove,as well.
[DianeAnderson-Minshall]
~
SEEINGL.A.THEGAY.WAY
A bus trip through the city's queer history. By Mary McGrath
A gay bus tour of Los Angeles? Surely
you jest. I hear about many L.A. bus
tours, but they're usually your straight
and standard tourist fare-Dead Actors
Tours, Shopping and Sushi, See the Getty
and Go Fishing! You name it. There's a
tour for everyone ... except us.
So when I got wind of a tour of gay L.A.,
I was immediately excited. Will we board
a big rainbow van and throw beads from
the windows? Will drag queens trip the
light fantastic channeling Judy Garland?
Perhaps a k.d. lang look~alike will be our
guide. Who cares-sign me up!
Out & About Tours is "Hollywood's
First and Only Gay Bus Tour" and it's a blast. Imagine
unveiling the hidden gems of Hollywood's "glorious and
sometimes painful past, through this entertaining look at
LGBT history:'
We showed our tickets, and as we boarded the bus from our
West Hollywood location, we heard a friendly voice.
"Do you want to be a top or a bottom?" our host asked,
inquiring about our preference to sit on the top deck or
below. We both opted for the better view, climbing the stairs
to take our seats. I looked around at the glee among all the
passengers. All denominations were present-old,
young,
gay,straight and even the sexually undecided were on hand to
enjoy the ride. The camaraderie was infectious as the engine
roared and we headed east.
Touring West Hollywood, downtown L.A., Silver Lake,
Echo Park and the Sunset Strip, we covered a lot of LGBT
history, beginning with the city's pre~Spanish~settlement
era, continuing through the Golden age of Hollywood, the
ROUTE
gay rights movement of the '60s and '70s and finally focusing
on what's been going on today. Much was revealed about
closeted movie stars and the places they'd frequent, including
those underground bars where whistles would blow when the
cops arrived. We learned about the sometimes painful blows
endured by many clamoring for basic human rights. And of
course, there was that sprinkling of celebrity gossip-Did
you know that Rock Hudson's career flourished when Tab
Hunter's private life was exposed?
Founded by Jim Anzide, who started as an actor and was
a founding member of the Circle X Theater Company, Out
& About Tours (outandabouttours.com) began in 2009, born
of Anzide's frustration with the outcome of Prop. 8. And it's
been on a roll ever since.
The tour is lively-calling for a lot of
audience participationas the hardships
and triumphs of gay life over the
decades are revealed.
The tour is lively-calling for a lot of audience participation
as the hardships and triumphs of gay life over the decades are
revealed. Riders wear nametags, becoming Harvey Milk, Greta
Garbo, Billie Jean King and others who have had an impact
on gay history. LGBT villains are booed, while our heroes are
cheered. I was Harvey Milk and enjoyed my applause.
Halfway through the tour, we took a break in Silver
Lake at one of the oldest gay bars in the area, appropriately
called The Other Side. Men and women both crooned and
swooned at the piano bar as memories were shared and new
friendships blossomed. ■
MEGABUS BOLTBUS
FARE
FARE
.TAKETHE BUS
·············································
...........................
···············································
..............................
.
.~.~.~~~.~..~~ ..~.~.~..Y.~r~.....................
.............
....
,1.,......................
...
,.~~
.........
.. Forgetyourbusofyesteryear, buck),youcanaffordtosee
loveany
.~~.i!.~.~.~!P.~.!~
..~~ ..~~~.X~r~.................
$.1..~
........................
...~~.~..........
. withitscrampedcabinsand yourlong-distance
scratchy
seats.Today's
busses timeyouwant.
*FareboughtIn July,basedon 14-dayadvancepurchase.
arecomfy,
ecoandmodem-all
Along
thesame[bus]lines,
whileretaining
anultraBOLTBUS
features
perkssuch
budget
price.Nowonder
asfreeWi-Fi,extralegroom
somanylesbians
are
andreserved
seating,
soyou
choosing
thebus.Here
cansitnexttoyourhoney.
aretwogreatcompanies: Itsfaresalsorunaslowas
MEGABUS
covers
the
$1.BoltBus
serves
theEast
Northeast
region
and
Coast,
running
tripsbetween
boasts
freeWi-Fiand
NewYork,Baltimore
and
outlets.
Withspecial
Washington
(andit'sa whole
pricesaslowas$1
lotnicerthantheChinatown
(that'sright,I saida
bus).[Eleni
Stephanides]
44
I curve
TREKKINGJORDANAND ISRAEL
Three days of female bonding in the desert. By Stephanie L. Freid
We had trekked Jordan's Jabel Bakker cliffs for six hours. The
luxury vacation, but the valley was beautiful, and it was
steep incline had been rough, but we were now on the way unlike anywhere I'd traveled before.
down. Robin, a 54-year-old Canadian psychotherapist, was a
Spotting the others circled around a blazing fire in the center
first-time hiker and self-proclaimed "recovering couch potato:'
camp, I hastily joined. "Lucky weve got wine;' one of my new
She had endured six miles of rough, desert terrain but finally friends enthused. Jordan's Islamic conservatism make beer
snapped on the slippery descent, unwilling to go further.
and wine inaccessible most places. And, no surprise, displays
"You won't fall down the cliff. Give me your hand;' coaxed of affection between same-sex partners are also taboo.
Judy Mizrachi, the slight, blonde Ohio proprietor of Women
"Good evening!" Mizrachi greeted me boisterously, passing
Walkers. The rest of us, women from all over the globe, cheered
the Shiraz. "Welcome to Raunchville cocktail hour. Let it
our fellow hiker on. I marveled at the outpouring from the
loose. Feel free to talk about your divorce, boob job, financial
trouble, in-law trouble-anything!"
nine women who, just hours earlier, had been strangers. This
was why I had joined Women Walkers: challenge, adventure,
As the wine worked its magic, secrets began escaping. One
fun and female camaraderie.
woman alluded to "wild sexual experimentation;' another
We slowly made our way out of the canyon that had once • spoke of her divorce from her husband of 21 years and
served trade merchants crossing Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Jordan
still others offered advice on single parenting. We were
and Israel. Exiting after dark, we piled into the back of a waiting in Girlsville, all right, and it was bliss. This was summer
pickup truck and headed to the "Rum Oasis Desert Palm
camp fun in the Mid East winter.
Camp:' The camp is named for the Wadi Rum, a Nabataean
When the mess tent dinner bell rang, we feasted on a
stomping ground of yore and Jordan's largest valley,which sits delicious Middle Eastern buffet of roasted lamb, baked garlic
atop shifting tectonic plates.
chicken, cucumber and tomato salad, rice, hummus, tehini,
At camp we offloaded our gear inside our roomy canvas pita bread and baklava with hot tea.
tents and I ventured to the generator-lit, concrete bathroom.
Between bites, I asked Mizrachi about her all-female
The porcelain sinks were modem but the toilet was nothing
trekking business, which she started in her 50s. "It was a lifemore than a hole-in-the-ground with a rubber hose-a
long dream. I love hiking here. With girls-only, you don't have
simple bidet. Frigid temperatures and no hot water cancelled to worry about make-up and you can be compassionate and
out the possibility of an evening shower. It was not exactly a let your emotions show;' said Mizrachi.
46
Icurve
:r
u
~
ffi
::E
i
@
a:
LL
.J
LU
~::c
a.
~
A woman from Berlin concurred. "On mixed excursions the chemistry changes. There's less bonding, and
domination and competition sap the calm energy:'
After dinner, we retired to our tents, seeking warmth
beneath sleeping bags covered with wool blankets. Too
cold to change, I reluctantly resigned myself to wearing
the leggings, fleece and wool socks I'd hiked in all day.
I was asleep within minutes.
DAY2: CAMELS,4X4SAND A TURKISHBATH
"Wakey, wakey!" Mizrachi beckoned at 7:30 a.m.
Stiff quad and calf muscles complaining, I pulled
on hiking boots and exited my tent for a first view
of our environment. Towering canyons glowed pale
rouge and sienna in the morning sun and endless
sand carpets disappeared into vast valleys of silence.
It was magnificent.
Two men were setting up an outdoor breakfast buffet
opposite the mess tent, while others, now rousing,
grabbed cameras to capture the morning view.
After quickly changing and brushing my teeth, I
joined the gal squad at a plastic table. We dined on
boiled eggs, pita bread with grape jelly, sliced cucumber
salad, Velveeta style cheese, black olives, halva, sweet
tea, instant coffee and more intimate talk: Divorce,
therapy, struggles and advice were the topics du jour.
Afterwards, we reconvened at the camel-loading area.
For the next three hours, our guides led us in caravan
formation on camelback through The Lawrence of
Arabia Valley, named for the famous movie filmed
there. We viewed vast canyons, stretches of desert and
ancient etchings on the stone walls.
This was "extreme desert;' our 28-year-old guide
Benny explained. Scant rain and drastic temperature
variables-high 90s during the day and low 30s at
night-were standard. "The desert is a testing ground;'
the tall, soft-spoken blonde explained. "You come up
against yoursel£ layers get stripped away and you
discover quiet parts you didn't know existed:'
Back at camp by midday, we piled into 4x4s and raced
across desert sand dunes, screaming with exhilaration.
We exited the desert in late afternoon a11d traveled
by highway to Petra's Amra Palace Hotel, our lodging for the night. In sharp contrast to the desert, the
resple.ndent marble staircase entrance, cascading
Bougainvillea and spotless rooms with crisp white
linens and feather pillows were refreshing. Desert?
OK. Luxury? Absolutely.
After check-in, we met at the hotel's Turkish bath
for an authentic Mid East experience: communal steam
room followed by almond soap body scrub and full
body massage.
At dinner we discussed the heavenly massage
experience. "Being bathed was like infant regression;'
one woman enthused. "I nearly fell asleep;' another
LEZ-FRIENDLY
TOURS
Aroundtheworld,tourcompanies
are
offeringwomen-only
andlesbian-specific
traveltours.Here'sanoverviewof some LESBIAN-FRIENDLY
TOURS
of thebest:
WhileWomenTraveling
Together
is not
a lesbiantravelcompany,
it organizes
an impressive
collectionof womenGAY-RUN
ORLESBIAN-ONLY
TOURS
Stronglyqueer-positive
WildWomen
onlytours,emphasizing
adventure
and
culturalimmersion.
Its 2011offerings
Expeditions,
whichdirectorBethMairs
includea VirginIslandstrip,Thailand,
started20yearsago,runsmorethan
Hawaiiandanexcursion
to Jordanand
25 all-womenoutdooradventure
trips
throughout
Canada
everyyear.WWEoffers Israel.(women-traveling.com)
a fewlesbianandbisexual
trips,andon
anygiventourabouthalftheparticipants All of theenticinglynamedAdventurous
andthevastmajorityof thestaffarequeer Wench'stoursarefor womenonlyactive,outdoorsy
women-thoughnone
women.
(wildwomenexp.com,
is specifically
designated
for lesbians.
"Ourtoursareopento all women,"writes
Bushwise
Women,
founded13years
founderDeanna
Keahey,
whoespouse$
ago,offerstripsto Europe,
Canada
and
thefollowingqueer-friendly
philosophy:
NewZealand.
OwnerYvonne
Jenkins
"Travelteachestolerance."
Theirtrips
estimates
,thatabout70 percentof her
participants
arequeerwomen.Bushwise includesailingthe BritishVirginIslands,
exploring
wildlifein CostaRicaandhiking
offerslesbian-only
trips-the most
inArizona.
(adventurouswench.com)
popularis to the motherland,
Lesbos,
Greece.
(bushwise.co.nz)
TheFemmeFITallhomepage
showsa
slimyoungwomanwearingpinkboxing
DriftwoodDreamers
offersguided
glovesanda grimexpression.
President
toursaroundNewZealand.
OwnerLyn
KateLichtersaysthat hertoursoffer"a
Riesterer
says,"MypartnerandI who
healthytwist onthe traditionalgirlfriend
runthis business
arelesbian,andif at
getaway."
Althoughthe organization
all possiblewe uselesbian-run
B&B
hasnotyet runanytoursexclusively
for
accommodation
onourtoursaswell."
Approximately
75 percentof Driftwood's lesbiansor bisexualwomen,theywould
loveto startone.(femmefita/1.com)
clientsarelesbian,andtheyoffer
lesbian-only
smallgrouptours.
Lucky,DickyandNickyChhetriare
(driftwooddreamers.com)
threeNepalesesisterswho have
Alsoin NewZealand,
PotikiAdventures openedup the worldfor womenby
co-owneranddirectorBiancaRansonis beingthe first femaletrekking
a Maorilesbianwhorunswomen-only guidesin their country.Since1994,
toursfroman indigenous
perspective. 3 SistersAdventurehasworkedtoward
empowering
womenin Nepal.Lucky
"I specializein adventure-kayaking,
estimatesthat 1Oto15percentof the
snorkeling,
abseilingandtrekking,as
participantsarelesbians,but 100
well as Maoriart andculture,"says
percentof the womenwho participate
Ranson.
Halfherstaffarelesbians,
"will be supportingNepalese
women...
andtheyprovidelesbiantours,too.
to beeconomically
independent
andself(potikiadventures.co.nz)
supporting."
(3sistersadventure.com)
In 201O,Canadian-based
gaytravel
companyOutAdventures
is offeringtwo Thoughnot primarilydesignedfor
toursfor womenonly,whichcofounder lesbians,GutsyWomenofferstours
Robert
Sharpexplains
are"sortof" lesbian- aroundthe world,includingNorth
America,LatinAmerica,Africa,Europe,
only."Weofferwomen-only
tours,[but]
Asiaandthe SouthPacific.OwnerApril
evenon ourregular[mixed]tripswe
Merendasays,"Weattractwomen
don'tidentifyas beinggay-only.We
from all overthe world,and65 percent
standbythe policythat we welcome
of our clienteleare repeatcustomers."
gaymen,lesbians,
theirfriendsand
(gutsywomen.ne~
[GillianKendall]
family."(out-adventures.com)
Trekkingcontinuedon page 63
Want more all-women
lesbian-owned
adventure travel? Read about
Manah Wilderness Expeditions at curvemag.com
HOT,GAY-FRIENDLY
HOTELSOF THE WEST
_ SurftidesInn,LincolnCity,Ore.
Ocean-front
roomswith private
balconies?
Check.Indoorpooland
sauna?Check.Ober-gay
friendly
ambiance?
Check.Locatedin one
of the Northwest's
mostLGBTfriendlyc·oastal
towns,Surftides
Inn(above)
containsall the
ingredients
for a romanticgetaway
(orevena familyaffair).This75yearoldfamilyoperatedboutique
hotelcombines
hipandswanky
detailingandoldschoolcoastal
charm.Sure,thesurfbeckons,
but
you'llalsofindvisitorscanoodling
arounda gorgeous
communal
fire
pit (thesiteof a giantclambake
duringtheirPride),findingsolace
in theoutdoorgardenandculling
throughbooksin the library.The
recentlyrenovated
Surftides'
restaurant
includes
anopencopper
fireplaceandbarthatservesup
nauticallynamedcocktailsand
comfortfoodfromthesea(like
theirto-die-forDungeness
crab
omelet).Clean,picturesque,
with
a mildmaritimeclimate,Surftides
Innis alsothe spotmanylesbian
coupleschooseto renewtheir
vows.Witha city as romantic
as LincolnCity-where local
glassblowers
put 2,000rare
hand-blownfloatsto seaeach
year,so visitingbeachgoers
can
findthem-who canblamethem?
(surftideslincolncity.com)
Hotel43,
Boise,Idaho
Nowthatthe
city hasalmost
halfa million
residents(many
whoworkin the
hi-techindustry),Boisefinallyhas
an upscaleboutiquehotelbefitting
a majortraveldestination.
And
whata doozy:this post-modern,
mahogany
marveloffersup live
jazzin the lounge,12-footceilings
andhugeflatscreen
lVs elsewhere.It'sjust blocksfromthe
charmingdowntown,
the Basque
region,a 16-milegreenbeltand
thecountry'sonlyriverthatruns
rightthroughdowntown.More
importantly,it's rightsmackin the
city'sculturallyburgeoning
artsy
hipsterhood,the LinenDistrict.
Everypartof Hotel43 is wonderful
andbefittinga NewYorkor San
Francisco
boutiquehotel.Around
eachcorneryoucanimagine
runningintoa novelistor cowgirl
or maybeevenan Idahonativelike
• DemiMoore.(hote/43.com)
HotelMonaco,
Seattle,
Wash.
Smackdabin the middleof the
EmeraldCity'sdowntown,
and
nearthefamousPikePlace
Market,PioneerSquareandthe
famedSeattlePublicLibrary,the
HotelMonacois a gay-friendly
Greekseaport-inspired
fourstarhotel.What'smore,the
hotelis superpetfriendly-no
extrachargefor sizeor weight
limitations.
Dogsittinganddog
itinerariesareavailable.
Bestyet?
AVIP(veryimportantpets)register
andmonogrammed
dogcoatsfor
the rainyweather(everytimeyou
buyone,Monacodonates$1Oto
the KingCountyHumane
Society).
(monaco-seattle.com)
andWestHollywood,
it is across
fromtheGrove,
walkingdistance
to MuseumRow,Melroseand
CBSStudios(sotakein a show).
(farmersdaughterhotel.com)
HotelMaya,LongBeach,Calif.
A gaggleof gaysdescended
on
queer-friendly
HotelMayafor Long
BeachPride,butthe pullto plush
bedswith inlaidstoneheadboards
andprivatebalconies
overlooking
the LongBeachwaterfrontkept
somefromthefestivitiesall
together.Oneof JoiedeVivre's
pet-friendlyboutiquehotels,Latin
American-inspired
HotelMaya
offersa placewhereyoucandrink
in poolsidecabanas,
eatcevicheat
theiroutdoorrestaurant
or snuggle
nextto thefirepitandwatchthe
boatscomein. Udvhotels.com)
[AnnaBellePeterson,
Kristin
A.
Smith,DianeAnderson-Minshall
andEleniSt~phanides]
Farmer'sDaughter
Hotel,West
·Hollywood,
Calif.
DoesL.A.saycountry?Probably
not,butFarmer'sDaughter-a
boutiquehotelwithcountry-styled
roomsandSouthern
hospitalitywill haveyoubootscootin'in no
time.Evenbetter,thehotelborders
thesupergayareasof Hollywood
GAYGAMBLING
INNEWENGLAND?
butthat Foxwoods
will makeroomfor sexualminoritiesin its Employment
Thistimeofyear,thousands
areflocking
to NewEngland
toseethe
EqualityPolicy(whichnowincludessexualorientation,
genderidentity
famedfallcolors,
withtreesdecked
out in shades
ofcrimson,
gold
andexpression)
makingtheover8,000-person
workforceevenmore
andevergreen.
Butwe'vefoundanevenmoreexciting
reason
to
queerandtrans-friendly.
Additionally,
its MinorityVendorProgram
will
visit.Foxwoods
Resort
andCasino,
in Mashantucket,
Conn.,
isthe
alsonowincludeLGBT,
alongwithotherminoritiesthatget
quintessential
gambler's
playground,
withsixcasinos,
priorityconsideration.
7,600slots,
theonlyWPTWorld
PokerRoomin New
England
andoneofthelargest
bingohallsin thecountry.
"TheMashantucket
PequotTribalNationis nostrangerto
discrimination
andthe strugglefor dignityandequality,dating
That's3,600seatsofhighstakesbingo-andlesbians
love
theirbingo.
Withthreehotels,
morethan30 restaurants,
asfar backasthe early17thcentury,"saidMashantucket
a luxurious
spa,24 retailshops
andfiveentertainment
PequotGamingEnterprises
ChiefMarketing
OfficerRobert
venues,
Foxwoods
isa gamers
paradise.
Buttheresort
Victoria."AtFoxwoods
ResortCasino,
we sympathize
with
recently
tooknewstepstoprotect
LGBT
workers,
the plightof anypeoplestrivingto receivethedignity,
making
it a queerparadise
aswell.In honor
ofLGBT
acknowledgement
andrespectpursuedbyhumankind
PrideinJune,Foxwoods--owned
bytheMashantucket
Pequot
Tribal
as a whole,andwe areproudto enactthis initiativeonbehalfof our
employees,
as wellasthe LGBT
community
at large."
Nation-announced
policies
thatwillofficially
recognize
andprotect
the
rightsofLGBT
resortcasino
employees,
notjustfortourism
buttobe
What'sevenbetter?Votingwithyourwallet.Hip,happening
anduber
in accordance
withnewtriballaws.Thismeans
thattheirstafftraining
gay-friendly,
Foxwoods
is nowthe placefor youto takeyourladyand
programs
include
procedures
toincrease
LGBT
awareness
andsensitivity, possiblywin somecashalongtheway.[E.S.andD.A.M.]
48
Icurve
DOWN AND DERBY: The Insider's Guide To Roller Derby {Soft Skull Press)
At first,it maybedifficultto trustsomeone
whogoesbythenameof "Axlesof Evil"or "KaceyBomber"as anexpert,but
BomberandEvil(whoalsogobyJenniferBarbeeandAlexCohen)
havecollaborated
to provideuswith oversevenyearsworth
of insiderknowledge
onthe roughandtumbleworldof rollerderby.It's a how-tomanualoneverything
derby.Asmembers
of the L.A.DerbyDollssince2003,theauthorsusetheirpersonalexperience,
coupledwith a well-researched
historyof the
sport,to writethisguide.A must-read
for anyderbygirl,rollerwannabe
or fanof thetrack.(softskull.com)
[NicoleVermeer]
REVIEWSMusic Watch
UncommonRoots
New Orleans-inspired sounds, beyond the bayou. By Margaret Coble
25,PattyLarkin
(Signature
Sounds):
ThelasttimeI heardPatty
Larkinlive,it wasjust herwith
herguitaronthenightstage
at theMichigan
Womyn's
MusicFestival.
Manya singer
wouldhavebeenswallowed
upin thatbigspace,but
notLarkin.Hermostrecent
album,25,is likeonefabulous
concert,withstripped-down
acousticversionsof 25 of
herfavoritelovesongsand
a guestlistthatreadslike
anindiefan'sdream:Janis
Ian,ErinMcKeown,
Cheryl
Wheeler
andmore.It's no
surprisethat"ComingUpfor
Air" is a standoutbecause
JenniferKimballis usedto
wrappinghersupplesoprano
arounda leadvocalto create
lovelyharmonies.
Larkin's
intricate,guitarworkon
"Tango"
will haveyoureaching
for oxygen.
"GoodThing,"
withDarWilliams,is slower
thantheoriginalbutjust as
expressive.
MaryChapin
Carpenter
addshersensuous
altoto "Chained
to These
Lovin'Arms."Guitargod
BeppeGambetta
addsacoustic
heftto "St.Augustine."
The
albumendswith"I'm Fine,"
complimented
bytheclose
harmonies
of TheNields.
I'm notwaitinguntilshe's-at
Michigan
again;I wantherin
myheadphones.
Youwill too.
[JamieAnderson]
s2
Icurve
Living in New Orleans, I'm exposed to a wide range of
"roots" music-blues, jazz, folk, bluegrass and more.
This month's featured albums all draw on various roots
sounds but come from somewhat unlikely sources:
a quirky Norwegian: female quartet; an out-queer
playwright, spoken word artist and singer-songwriter
originally from the suburbs of Chicago; and an '80s
New Wave icon with a four-octave vocal range.
A richly textured, roots-inspired
Le Pop, Katzenjammer
(Nettwerk):Coming off its
first U.S. tour, including a few Lilith Fair dates,
Katzenjammer has a good buzz going. And its
jubilant, 12-track debut, originally released in 2008
overseas, has hit American shores recently, keeping
that buzz alive. This album very aptly captures the
quartet's amazing energy and obvious talent. From
the opening circus-carousel sounds of "Tea With
Cinnamon" to the high-spirited mariachi-polka of
"A Bar in Amsterdam" to the piratical sea shanty
"Hey Ho on the Devil's Back;' bandmembers Solveig
Heilo, Anne Marit Bergheim, T urid Jorgensen and
Marianne Sveen prove themselves to be gifted
vocalists and clever instrumentalists, utilizing every-
in the end that is exactly what
sound that still somehow
manages to have widespread
pop appeal. They are a bit all
over the place, musically, but
I love about this album.
er
w
~
~
~
z
w
thing from banjos, mandolins, guitars and trumpets,
to accordions, xylophones, kazoos and melodicas
for a richly textured, roots-inspired sound that still
somehow manages to have widespread pop appeal.
"Play-My Darling, Play" mixes bluegrass with Celtic
folk, 'J\in't No Thang" goes a more bluesy route and
"Demon Kitty Rag" is a knee-knockin' ragtime rollick.
They are a bit all over the place, musically, but in
the end that is exactly what I love about this album.
(katzenjammer.com)
~
~
~
ijl
(j)
f2
(j)
~
i
~
~
~
~
<I'.
~
ed~nfantasys
Oompa!,SabrinaChap (ERT):The leadoff
song, "Blueprint for Destruction;' on Chap's
sophomore musical release might leave you
thinking she's doing her best Ani Difrancodoes-New-Orleans
impression, but keep
listening: Chap's got more tricks up her
sleeve. "Never Been a Bad Girl" is a cheeky,
cabaret-style jazz number (the video for
which features New York City's Lower East
Side queer scene star Murray Hill),"Carolina"
is a bouncy bluegrass cut, "Failed Waitress/
Failed Astronaut" is languid Dixieland jazz
and "Nobody Home to Sing the Blues;' is,
well, the blues. The entire album is exquisitely
produced and Chap's vocals are rich and spoton, across many diverse styles. This album
deserves more attention than it's getting, and
Chap deserves to be a star. (sabrinachap.com)
her wish, and works with a Dream Team of
A-list players-B.B. King, Allen Toussaint,
Jonny Lang, Charlie Musselwhite and Ann
Peebles, among others. You might wonder
if she can pull it off, but make no mistake,
Lauper nails it. From the harmonica-blues
of the opening "Just Your Fool;' to the New
Orleans-style piano R&B of "Shattered
Blues;' to the Bobby Blue Bland classic"Early
in the Morning;• to the upbeat honky-tonk
blues of "Rollin' _and Tumblin; " Lauper's
voice works. The production is impeccable,
and the song choice is diverse and interesting.
What a pleasant surprise. (cyndilauper.com)
■
II DiscoverSex
{. ~
FunShopping
withFriends
•L •Reviews: real opinions
-1_. from real people
X
MemphisBlues,Cyndi Lauper(Downtown):
Cyndi Lauper has had a long and illustrious
career since her early, yellow-haired'80s New
Wave days, racking up album nods, as well as
a whole host of other musical awards. She's
made albums of folk, pop, dance, classics,
jazz and other genres, but recording a set
of blues covers has been a desire of hers for
en years. With this 12-cut disc she finally gets
Sexis magazine:
discover your own is
Speak up:
J forums
and polls
,,,,
Connect to toy
~~ makers: Edenlink
""'
Fun to follow:
EdenCafe blog
,
Get personal:
!!.--. interviews
www.edenfantasys.com
(800) 350-9050 Mon-Fr 8 am-4 pm ET
@ edenfantasys
facebook@ edenfantasys
w
:iE
<(
::],
z
w
~
I
Other Licks
_
reduce your
w
0
z
carbon
footprint
~
0
ct
~
0
0
~cc
0
z::)
FleshTone
Kelis
:5
z (lnterscope)
~
Cl)
iI:
LoveAndIts Opposite Synthesis
OJRap
TraceyThorn
(Merge)
(MinistryOfSound)
MySoul
LeelaJames
(Stax)
cc
0
E, Fouryearsis a long
Q.
0
timeto waitfor a
I
ai newalbum,but
0
cc
sometimes
it's worth
~0
it. Takinga decidedly
w
uf electronic
turn,this
:J
w
non-stop10-track
~
0
zw discis oneof the
w
~
summer'sbestdancect
popsoundtracks.
w
a..
"Acapella"and"4th
~
of July"arealready
~w hugehits,whilethe
3::
z eurodisco
"Intro"and
z
blippy
techno
"22nd
~
z Century"
aremyfaves.
w
UJ
(iamkelis.
com)
Cl)
::)
::)
J
J
+.
make your
w
Fromthe momentI
first heardThorn's
voiceon the first
EverythingButThe
Girlalbumin 1984,
I was in love.That
hasn'tchanged,and
this latestsolorelease
is like reconnecting
with an old friend.
Stark,simpleand
beautifullyarranged,
Thorntacklesthe
complexitiesof
relationships
and
life, everin flux.
(traceythorn.com)
Following
up her1999
debutdiscLearning
Curve,here'sanother
gorgeous,
lushalbum
fromthequeenDJ
of drumandbassto
addto ourcollection.
Don'texpectskittering
beats,though-this
is sophisticated
but
purepop-electronica,
fromthe melodic
"GivingIt AllAway"to
the rocking"InYour
Corner"to theelectro
beatsof "FinallyGetTo
You."(djrap.com)
Mixingthesoul
traditionof singerslike
ArethaFranklin,
Mavis
StaplesandGladys
Knightwithproduction
valuesof contemporary
R&B,Jamesturns
outa variedbut
consistent
modern
soulalbumthatopens
withthepowerfully
defiant"I Ain'tNewTo
This"andendswith
theemotional
"It's
Over"-with a whole
lotof heartin between.
(lee/ajames.
com)
girl proud!
Subscribe to our interactive
digital edition and get curve
in your inbox before it hits
the stands.
REVIEWSIn The Stacks
Three,Two, One, Action!
Books to inspire the inner stuntwoman in all of us. By Rachel Pepper
JoanJett,ToddOldham
(Ammo):"Peoplealwayscall
JoanJettan'icon,'andit kind
of pissesmeoff.Notbecause
she'snotaniconbutbecause
thatwordtendsto glossover
thefactthatsheisa totalweirdo
whocontinues
to makegreat
music,"writesBikiniKill's
Kathleen
Hannain theforewordof thisbook.Whether
youcallJettaniconfor her
music,heroft-replicated
shag
haircutorfor beinga tough
chickwhoknowshowto
wielda guitar,thisbookwill
appealto yourfanaticism.
Chronicling
the life of the '?Os
rockgoddess,
everychapter
tellsthestoryfromJett's
perspective,
beginning
with herchildhood,
intoher
infamous
Runaways
yearsand
reaching
all thewayto the
Blackhearts.
Thebackstage
snapshots
andglamourpies
thateditorandfashionicon
ToddOldhampullstogether
makethisbookexceptional
andhelppainta refreshingly
uneditedimageof the iconic
artist.It'sgoodenoughto be
displayed
onyourowncoffee
tableor theoneat yourlocal
dykecafe.[LiskaKoenig]
54
I curve
Streb, offers up action
This month, real-life women of action tell their stories.
Pam Grier's memoir tackles race, sex and runaway
horses, while Elizabeth Streb's book serves as a guide
to becoming your very own action hero.
riding motorcycles and dancing with companies in
San Francisco and New York, where she still makes
her home. In 2003, Streb took over a vacant loading
dock in Brooklyn and established the much-beloved
Streb Lab for Action Mechanics (SLAM), a place of
courage, cunning, contortionism and queer urban
cheekiness. Most of the text of Streb is concerned
with the mechanics ·of space, place and time and how
'extreme action" dance can subvert these notions.
Irritated by the traditional, rigid world of classical
ballet, Streb writes that she wanted"to find a way to be
true to my own experience of action;' which included
wanting to fly.Much of the choreography that evolved
from these early ambitions became stunt-oriented,
and pushed her willing accomplices into exciting, often
dangerous territory: evading pendulums of cement
blocks, spinning on a wheel, running up walls and
generally challenging the conventional parameters of
dance. Enjoy Streb's book as you would a performance,
or a visit to a foreign country. The knowledge you'll
glean on the journey through its pages makes the trip
worthwhile. (feministpress.org)
Foxy:
MyLifeinThree
Acts,PamGrier(Springboard):
Many
lesbians know Pam Grier as the actress who played Kit
Streb:HowtoBecome
an Extreme
ActionHero,Elizabeth Porter on The L Word. Kit, a recovering alcoholic and
Streb(Feminist
Press):Elizabeth Streb is the founder the owner of The Planet cafe, was one of the series'
of STREB, a pioneering dance company specializing best-developed characters: (mostly) straight but funky,
in "extreme action" choreography. She is an out dating across the gender spectrum and always ready
for some fun. Grier was handpicked to play Kit by the
lesbian with an impressive list of accomplishments,
show's producers and added some professional cred
which include a Guggenheim Fellowship, National
to an otherwise unknown cast (except for Jennifer
Endowment for the Arts grants and a MacArthur
Fellowship (nicknamed the Genius Award). Streb's first Beals, of course). Before there was Kit Porter, though,
book is not so much an autobiography as a manifesto. there was FoxyBrown,Grier's breakout film from 197 4.
It's divided into nonsequential sections, including One of the era's best-known blaxploitation movies,
"Body;' "Motion" and 'The Real Move:' Anna Deavere shot with an urban, African American audience in
Smith, the acclaimed playwright, actor and New York mind, Foxy Brown, as well as its predecessor, Coffy,
University professor, supplies the foreword, in which made Grier a star. Since then, she has appeared on TV
she calls Streb a "brilliant rascal:'
and in many other films, including Quentin Tarantino's
Streb's own childhood is sketched out briefly. She JackieBrown.In her fast-paced autobiography, written
was a tomboyish child who enjoyed downhill skiing, with Andrea Cagan, Grier traces her rise to fame,
helping her father with construction projects and starting with her childhood growing up in a military
performing brave feats. These include extracting a family.-Sexuallyassaulted as a child and young woman,
fishhook from an eel at age 8, which incited a nearby Grier is open about the abuse-both the devastating
group of fishermen to cheer "good fella!" This, she effect it had on her and the strength she developed to
writes, made her "hugely proud for hours and hours:' survive it. The book also chronicles Grier's relationships
Armed with a burning ambition to succeed, Streb soon with stars like basketball player Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
became an unstoppable "human action machine;' and actor Freddie Prinze, as well as her brush with
•
m
~
§
~
~
~
E
3
~
a:
~
fil
Q+A
Rachel Venning
Lesbian sexperts Rachel Venning and Claire
Cavanah have been running the womanfriendly sex boutique Babeland for nearly
20 years, setting up stores in Seattle and
New York. Last year, the two collaborated
on writing Moregasm:Babeland'sGuide to
Mind-BlowingSex. Venning gives us her
take ~n the how-to guide.
Who'stheintended
audience
foryourbook?
Anyone who's at a transition point in their
sexual journey, whether they're just starting
out ... coming out of a relationship or even
if they're still in the relationship but they're
at some new phase of"Let's explore all these
things and try things together:'
Howis it differentfromothersexbooks?
There are some good sex guides, but they
tend to fall into the category of either the
encyclopedic ones that have sort of everything from analingus to zoophilia-good
for reference, but not fun. And then there
::i-
UJ
(/)
:::i
0
a:
~
J
a:
UJ
a.
Q
~
f
i
a:
0
~
J
J
~
(/)
l:
~
;:i
cancer. Still, it's her rise to Hollywood fameshe was discovered working as a receptionist
at American International Pictures-and her
continued success as an actor that give this
book its heart. About the blaxploitation movement, she writes, "To me, what really stood out
about the genre was women of color acting like
heroes rather than depicting nannies or maids.
We were redefining heroes as school teachers,
nurses, mothers and street-smart women who
were proud of who they were:' Grier also did all
her own stunts, even though the outcome was
so~etimes unexpected. She was riding a runaway stallion, on-a shoot in Rome, as it crashed
through from the set of her film, Arena, into
Federico Fellini's Amarcord, causing the
acclaimed director to mutter,"My fantasy has
come true;' at the sight of her. "If you needed a
woman of color to handle a gun, do a wheelie
on a chopper, or fall off a cliff into a rice paddy,
I was the one to call;'she writes. Grier's amazing
rise to fame as a black woman in racist America
will continue to inspire young women. Foxy
will give Grier's fans the backstory they've
been waiting for, proving again that hard
work and resilience, mixed with a passion for
life, will take you far. (springboardpress.net)
■
are ones that are glossy, with Barbie and Ken
photographs. We wanted to make a book
that had really good information that was
presented in a fun way, and that was also
visually very appealing and a little bit quirky
and individualistic-not so formulaic.
Howis it organized?
It starts with anatomy and physiology. The
second part of the book is all about knowing
yourself. Then we move into communication,
which is about asking for what you want.
Talkaboutthequeercomponents
ofthebook.
The way that we incorporated queer stuff
-wasn't, like, oh, here's a lesbian chapter at
the end. We tried to really interweave that
throughout the book.
Whatpartsof thebookareyouproudest
of?
I'm proud of the way we did the sexual-
GoodPorn-A
Woman's
Guide
ErikaLust
(SealPress)
LuvYaBunches
LaurenMyracle
(AmuletBooks)
Fourawkwardpreteens(includingone
ErikaLusthasbeen
makingwomen-friendlywithtwo mommies)
uniteto bringdown
pornfor years,andit
showsin GoodPorn, the meanmiddleschoolqueenbee,
givingthe readera
Modessa.
Intheir
comprehensive
look
at the industry.Better plightfor fight (aka
chat-roommadness),
yet,it giveswomen
thetoolsto starttheir the girls"awesometatiously"discover
ownexploration
of
"friends4 life."A book
feministporn,with
for youngwomenand
everything
froma list
of pornterminology
to a cutereminderof
classicadultfilm titles. friendshipat anyage.
(abramsbooks.
com)
(sea/press.
com)
[SarahC.Jimenez]
[NicoleVermeer]
orientation fluidity, because this is a very
mainstream book. This is a book that's in
all the Borders and Barnes & Nobles in the
country. To be able to bring ... self-expression
and exploration, and get it into a very mainstream distribution felt really good.
I wasimpressed
at thebalanceof thedesign
andthequantityof information.
It can almost seem like it is going to be
fluffy, because it is a very well-designed
book. It was really important to us to get a
range of models, and more realistic-looking
people than is typical.
Werethereanytopicsthatyouwantedto talk
aboutbutfelt youdidn'thavespacefor?
No, not really. We wanted to do this great,
fun, accessible, empowering bpok, and I feel
like we did that.
Anything
elsethatyou'dliketo sharewith
curve readers?
Claire and I just feel very lucky to be in
the lesbian community, be lesbians, and be
so supported by our community and do
this work around sexuality in the world.
[LoriSelke]
RockPaperTiger
ByLisaBrackmann
.(Soho
Books)
TheCarousel
StefaniDeoul
(A&MBooks)
IraqveteranEllie
A strangerinfluences
hasfoundrefuge
a smallNortheastern
in the Beijingart
community
whenshe
community,
buta
inspiresthetownspeople
chanceencounter
with to rebuilda carousel.
A
a strangercatapults
brilliantandunsettJing
herintoa mazeof
mystery(witha lesbian
conspiracies.
Rock
twist) TheCarousel
PaperTigerprovides introduces
usto people
insightintomodern-day we mightnormally
Chinaandintotheworld ignorebutsoongrow
of a femalesoldierwho fondof.An intensenovel
questions
theroleof her aboutfriendship,
love
government
in a war
andheartache
it's also
shedidnotexpectto
inspirational
andfull of
fight.(sohopress.con1)hope.(aandmbooks.com)
[LiskaKoenig]
[Kathilsserman]
September 2010
I55
REVIEWSSapphic Screen
Meta MotionPictures
Directors come out from behind the camera. By Candace Moore
Daria:TheComplete
Animated
Series(MTV):
"I don'thavelowself-esteem.
I havelowesteemfor everyoneelse,"saysthecartoon
character
Daria.Foranyone
who'severfelt liketheodd
girloutin highschool,Daria's
cynicismandwry humorwas
well-deserved
comfortfood
for everybabydykein the
'90s.Alongwith herfriend
JaneLane,Dariatakes
on snootyFashionClub
members,ignorantteachers
andobnoxious
footballplayers,
andmakesus LOLin the
process.Morethan1oyears
havepassedsincetheshow
(anunlikelyspinoffof Beavis
andButt-Head}
first airedon
MTV.
Withits DVDrelease,
brightnewgenerations
of
girlswill undoubtedly
fall
victimto thisbespectacled
brainiac'scharms.The
eight-discsetcontainsall
fiveseasons,
as well astwo
specialmovie-length
episodes.
The"roughcut" pilot,"Sealed
Witha Kick,"is alsoincluded.
Theonlydownsideto the
newlyreleasedseriesis that
someof the originalmusic
hasbeenchanged,dueto
copyrightissues,but it's still
• wortheverypenny.Don't
passthis oneup-your
geekgirl creEIhangsin the
balance.
(dariaondvd.
com)
[lisa Gunther]
56
I curve
Both the experimental thriller The Owls and the
mockumentary The Baby Formula feature their
auteurs on-screen, as the films toy with genre and
genetics, respectively.
haunts the film, her dead body in the desert is also
a metaphor, illustrating the buried-in-time quality
of the past and the potential isolation of the future.
While the rotting corpse and a mysterious stranger
(hunky Skyler Cooper) are important elements in the
film, so too are the four main characters, who, finding
TheOwls(Peccadillo
Pictures):
The film is sun-flecked
rather than shadowy, as might befit a story about a that they can no longer drink and take drugs the way
dark secret. In this desert-set film noir, Cheryl Dunye they used to, must weigh their desire for new affairs
assumes the role of both filmmaker and character as against the reality of their longtime commitments and
she explores lesbian desire, subjectivity and history. face their ambivalence about taking on "adult" roles.
The Owls incorporates self-conscious genre play, The Owls eventually confesses that its generational
beyond the film's framed realities and realistic concerns outweigh its genre tropes. Interviews with
constructs, crafting its meditation on lesbian midlife members of the Parliament Collective, the brain trust
crises as a murder mystery and a ghost story. Opening
that collaborated on The Owls (and a nice pun on
Chaucer's Parliamentof Fowls),eventually share a split
with footage of queer activism, from AIDS-era ACT
UP protests to recent rallies against California's Prop. screen with the fictional storyline. "Owls;' it turns
8, the film uses the murder of a young dyke, Cricket
out, is a funny acronym for older, wiser lesbians and
(Itty Bitty Titty Committee'sDeak Evgenikos), as a seems like a premature obsession for Dunye and her
set. The figureheads of queer cinema involved in the
plot hook, implicating a foursome of 40-something
lesbians-Cheryl
Dunye, Guinevere Turner (Go making of this film are really just owlets, experienced
Fish,The L Word), Lisa Gornick (Tick Tock Lullaby) and contemplative, yet still relevant, vital and hip. No
and V.S. Brodie ( Go Fish)-who
are the true doubt they have much more to give. (theowlsmovie.com)
subjects of the film. Shots of the feathers, cacti,
TheBabyFormula(Wolfe):The notion of "womanly
skulls and animal hides that decorate the characters'
homes (which are also splashed with modern art and sperm'' is the sci-fi premise that stretches Alison
posters from their rock band glory days) tell a story of Reid's lesbian-mom mockumentary until it nearly
women who retain bohemian tastes but have acquired pops. After attempts to cat-burgle semen from stem
many domestic comforts. While Cricket's presence cell labs and family members, committed girlfriends
Q±A
Alison Reid
Alison Reid's IMDb resume reads like the
manifesto for a bona fide badass, from stunt
doubling in Shoot 'Em Up and X-Men: The
Last Stand to stunt coordinating two of the
Saw films,Reid is a woman not to betrifled
with. However, this self~professedadrenaline
junkie has found a new passion behind the
camera in directing the sci-fi mockumentary
The Baby Formula (see article left). Reid shares
the challenges of working with a real-life
pregnant cast, her daring dayjob and how a
near death experience inspired her to come out.
Howdidyoubecome
a stuntcoordinator?
My standard answer is I fell into it. I did my
first stunt when I was 17 years old and I just
craved excitement and I was sort of bored with
school and .. .I was a bit of an adrenalinejunkie
w
w
..J
so... I went after it, and managed to makea
f2,
~ career out of it.
ul Youcameoutafteryouwereinjured
ina stunt
z
§(.) gonewrong,canyoutellusaboutthat?
frl I was rolling a car off a ramp and ... there was
~
an explosion to go along with it
and it went just perfectly,the car
flew up in the air and came down
on its roo£ It wasn't until I took my
helmet off and my neck brace that
I realized something wasn't quite
right. So they took me to the hospital and of
course discovered that Cl, which is the very
top vertebrae,had a compression fracture. That
could've been my last moving moment or my
last moment alive.The attraction to women
had alwaysbeen in my being, I had sort of
suppressed it and that just came to the forefront as something I didn't want to suppress
anymore.
Howdidyougofromstuntsto directingThe
BabyFormula?
Ia wanted to do it for a very long time. I just
felt like I needed to bechallengingmyself in
different ways... and was interested in telling
stories that appealed to me.
Whatuniqueproblems
didworkingwitha
pregnant
castpresent
foryou?
Oh my God. [Laughs] What, like when they
go into labor when they're not supposed to in
the middle of a shooting day,
that kind of thing perhaps? I
wanted to shoot during the
Pride parade here in Toronto
and have Angela's water
break during the parade and
so we could make a bit of a scene of it and
throw her on the back of a Harley~Davidson.
And we were rehearsing that exact scene
when her water broke. For real.
Whatdoyouhaveplanned
next?
Well, plans are two-fold. I want to make
another feature film.And I want there to be
some stunts in this one. But I also very much
want to make a television series using The
Baby Formula characters.
OKhere'sa funquestion,
asidefromyour
partner,
whowouldyouchoseasyourstem-cell
babymama?
It's hard not to say Angelina Jolie. I was one
of her stunt doubles in Taking Lives.
Whowouldwinin an arm-wre lingmatch-you or ZoeBell?
•... .
Me.
. ,
[RachelShatto]
• • .' • ..
.
(.)
er
~
6
~
a:
:::)
!!!.
:::)
~
z
z
0
CD
a:
<{
:I:
(.)
(.)
er
w
cir
a:
w
~
g
..J
~
w
g
er
0
z
~
en
::E
::;
~
en
::i
:::)
[
..J
w
::E
a:
w
w
a:
0
z
~
..J
<{
cf
[jj
!;.
§
z
~
0
a:
0
(.)
~
::E
Athena and Lilith
become the first
women to prove
men unnecessary
to
procreation.
Comparing bulging tummies, they
allow· a camera crew to document their
private medical miracle: They are having
each other's biological babies. Reid plays
the documentary filmmaker who pushes
to stay with the action as the Sapphically
named pair have noisy lovers' spats, refuse
to be filmed or pull the shower curtain
closed on their candle-lit baths. The Baby
Form~la lambastes the hormonal surges,
dual cooing, prenatal yoga, hypervigilant
ultrasounds, topless gay Pride parades
and awkward family gatherings of a couple
enamored with their unique process of
conception. A baby-happy derivative of
such tongue-in-cheek films as Best in Show,
The Baby Formula (now on DVD) takes its
"what if" premise as far as it can but has
little in the way of plot-instead, the film
relies on the spontaneous hilarity of its
loony, punch-drunk and melodramatic
cast of ·characters. (wolfevideo.com) ■
DVD Picks
' .....- ..
t
•
r
•-
I
r• •• • r
I
,: •
--
Lord,SaveUsFrom
BehindtheBurlyO
Glee:TheComplete
(FirstRunFeatures) FirstSeason
YourFollowers
(Thunderstruck
Films)
(20thCenturyFox)
Thisfilmoffersa
ThisBrazilian
film is a
glimpseintothe
touchingtributeto that Thisdocattemptsto
Gleeis abouta group
worldof
age-oldconundrum- engagein an unbiased glamourous
of kidstryingto make
burlesque.
Archive
relationships.
Marina conversation
about
it to stardom-orat
footageandinterviews leastoffof thelowest
movesto thecity
religion,butgrows
withstarsof the
hopingto becomean
tiresomewhenthe
rungonthehighschool
genr~ncluding Kitty ladder.
actor,butis distracted narratormocksthe
Theshowis
West,Tempest
Storm
bylovewithmusician separation
of church
complete
withqaby
Justine.Alongthe
andstate.Weapplaud andBlazeStarrdramaanda touching
chronicle
thehistoryof coming-out
way,herflatmates,
thefilm's critiqueof
story.It
including
a transwoman,intolerance,
butnotits thissexyandsubversive featuresa talented
experience
theirown
condescending
attitude formoftheatrical
cast,including
Jane
This
romanticencounters toward"gaylifestyles." entertainment.
Lynchwhoclearlywas
nostalgicandinform- putonEarthto playSue
asthefilmtiestogether Themessage-"God
ativedocwill leaveyou Sylvester,
threedifferent
stories lovesyou,butnot
thehard-ass
wantingto knowmore. cheerleading
about,well,relationwhatyoudo."Pass.
coach.
(firstrunfeatures.con1)(foxconnect.con1)
ships.(figafilms.con1) (/ordsaveusthemovie.con1)
[Anna
[LiskaKoenig]
BellePeterson]
[LisaGunther]
[LisaGunther]
Paulista
(FiGaFilms)
September 2010
I57
REVIEWSTech Girl
How Gay Is Your Phone?
What you don't know about your service provider might surprise you. By Serena Freewomyn
Today's headlines are filled with stories of corporate misdeeds and
fiscal irresponsibility. The banks are failing and Big Oil is killing the
oceans. Sometimes it seems like the world's problems are so big that
the average person can't make a difference. But that's actually not the
case. Little things-like which cell phone company you choose-can
make a big difference.
The January 2010 issue of Consumer Reports rates the four major
cell phone providers in the U.S. on cost, data plans and overall
customer satisfaction. If you're looking for the best financial deal,
this report is very helpful. Unfortunately, the report says nothing
about political track records or LGBT support.
Luckily, there is someone who is looking into these important
criteria. The HRC Corporate Equality Index has compiled detailed
feedback about many major corporations. Its evaluation is based on
the following criteria:
• Nondiscrimination
policiesmustincludesexual
orientation
andgenderidentity
• Employee
benefitscoversame-sex
partners
• Benefits
includetransgender-inclusive
health
insurance
coverage
• Thecompany
mustprovideLGBTcompetency
training
• Thecompany
is committed
to LGBTpublic
engagement,
including
philanthropy
• Thecompany
doesnotsupportcausesthatwould
hurttheLGBT
community
58
Icurve
HOWDIFFERENT
CARRIERS
RATE
AT&Thas an HRC rating of 100 percent. It includes both sexual
orientation and gender identity in its nondiscrimination policy. AT&T
provides domestic partner benefits for its employees, and transgender
health care is fully covered under the company's plan. AT&T also
provides training for managers on LGBT employment issues and is a
financial supporter of LGBT causes.
•
Sprint also has a 100 percent rating from the HRC, though
Consumer Reports scores Sprint lower on its data plans and overall
customer satisfaction.
Verizonhas a 70 percent rating because its nondiscrimination policy
does not include gender identity, and the company actively opposed a
measure from its shareholders that would have added gender identity
to the policy.
CREDO
Mobileis another mobile provider that was not ranked by the
HRC because it has fewer than 500 employees. However, that doesn't
mean it isn't LGBT-friendly. Its nondiscrimination policy covers
sexual orientation and gender identity and provides limited health
care coverage for transgender employees. The HRC does recognize
CREDO as a responsible corporate citizen. And no wonder-since
the company was founded in 1985, CREDO/Working
Assets
has raised $65 million for progressive causes and supports groups
such as the Gay, Lesbian, Straight Education Network (GLSEN),
Planned Parenthood and the Ms. Foundation for Women.
. The LGBT community is estimated to have $712 billioh in'buying
power, according to research by Witeck-Combs Communications
and Marketresearch.com. "Wireless providers are in overdrive
promoting their products and services. LGBT and other equalityminded consumers must hold them accountable by supporting
those that support us and avoiding companies and products in
the 'red' on equality;' says Eric Bloem, Deputy Director of HRC's
Workplace Project.
During tough economic times, it is hard to say which is more
important: saving money or supporting gay-friendly businesses.
However, businesses are also more apt to listen to their customers in
an economic downturn and lesbians are especially known for voting
with their wallets. ■
SERVICE
PROVIDER
AVERAGE
PRICE
CUSTOMER HRC
SERVICE
RANKING
AT&T
$86
$83
$83
$80
$70
66%
67%
75%
70%
100%
100%
70%
50%
N/A
N/A
Sprint
Verizon
TMobile
CREDO
Basedon Consumer
Reports
Surveyof 2-lineplanwith601-1000sharedanytimeminutes
~
()
0
f-
<£l.
er
w
....J
....J
w
~
z
~
:J
Cl
LGBTweet
Ten tweeters to follow now.
You've signed up for Twitter, added Ellen DeGeneres, Rachel Maddow and your girlfriend (in that order) to your
feed. So who do you add next? We've braved the questionable places that keywords like "lesbian" take you on
Twitter to suggest these 10 accounts to make your tweeting experience a dyketastic voyage. [YanaTallon-Hicks]
@bigqueer covers up-to-the-minute happenings in queer
news. This tweeter encourages "intelligent dialogue ... by, for
and about the LGBT community," and brings a legitimizing
balance to all those pop culture icons you also follow.
@lezgetreal gives you the quick skinny on a "gay girl's
view of the world," featuring news, noteworthy lesbians and
links to favorite "lezsites."
@bestlesbianweek is a gay gossip's best friend. These
tweets feature leztastic quotes and titillating tidbits with a
hilarious attention to detail that won't let you miss a thing.
@Babeland_ Toys will let you be the first to know about its
sexy promos, lip-biting giveaways and-ahem-educational tips. Not that you need them.
@TheQCC, queer crafters from queercraftercollective.com
share dykey DIY tips, crafty queers you can buy from and
details on the "crafternoons" they host in Washington, D.C.
Great for queers with kids, too.
@SuzeOrmanShow is full of advice, quips and personal
tidbits from the financial maven herself.
@dykerepublic, the owners of "Blog for Sophisticated
Dykes" is clever and helpful. Linking to boi-ish fashion
trends and articles to keep you in the know about everything from natural deodorants to "how to spot a dyke in
the Midwest."
@FemmesGuide follows a "sex-positive, femme, queer
collaborative blog focusing on gender, sexuality and life
as a femme." Their tweets offer yummy vegan recipes,
sewing tricks, book reviews and offer all things femmecentric to your perfectly manicured fingertips.
@dorothysnarker, one of our favorite gay girl pop
culture commentators, lets you follow her every snarky
thought. Updating her 4,500 plus followers-sometimes
every three minutes-it's never a dull moment with
Dorothy tweets.
@lesbiangeek and @lesbiangamers are sister sites and
sister Twitter feeds, offering up all manner of geek-related
news, from video game goodies and gadgets to lezzie
geek pop culture tweets. Micro-blogging doesn't get any
better than this.
15 MORE
CELESBIANS
TOFOLLOW:
@SandraBemhardt
@THEsaragilbert
@Courtenaysemel
@Lisa_BrookeMTV
@KimmyStolz
@amandapalmer
@staceyannchin
@theteganandsara
@ladygaga
@bridgetmcmanus
@samantharonson
@lindsaylohan
@shamimsarif
@katemoennig
@TheRealCurveg
September 2010
Io
.ASTROGRRL
Feel The Earth Move
Solid plans shift this September. Will you stay strong or be
swallowed up in the moment? By Charlene Lichtenstein
Virgo(Aug.24-Sept23)
Sex:Money can't buy you love. But it can buy expensive
dinners and lavish trips. You have to decide if she loves
you for your money or for your true sel£ Uh oh. Career:
Cash in on all your hard work this month. You may
get a raise or a promotion. If not, get a new job. Be the
corporate despot you always dreamed you would be.
Ubra(Sept.24--0ct.23)
Sex:Youare a babe magnet this month. Don't ask
why. Just make good use of time. Holiday planning
season is not that far off. Career:
You meet and greet
all the high~powered corporate players now. Can you
impress them with your savior faire and intelligence?
Scorpio(Oct.24-Nov.22)
Sex:She loves you but will not reveal all of her secrets
to you just yet. Will you be sufficiently intrigued
to continue probing? Maybe that's her plan. Career:
VIRGO(AUG.24-SEPT.23) Colleagues are moving and grooving behind the
I havealwaysfoundit amusing scenes at work. Are they going to get the advantage
(andsomewhat
arousing)
that over you? It will be highly unlikely if you can "out"
Virgoshavebeendesignated
as maneuver them.
theVirginsof the zodiac.Maybe
it's becausetheycanappearso Sagittarius(Nov.23-Dec.22)
formidableandseriousthat many Sex:Gal pals can turn into lovergrrls if you decide to
faintof heartwomendon'teven take that big step. Do you want to risk a perfectly good
try to breakthroughthatstiff friendship on a quick fling? Hmm. Career:Friends in
veneerto plumbtheirdepths.Fact high places make sure that you are protected from the
is,sisters,thesebabesarevixens
greater corporate forces.
underthesheets.Theyjust don't
believein advertising
all their
merchandise
beforethe general capricorn(Dec.23-Jan.20)
public.Goodthing,t0<r-no sense Sex:Look your very best at work so you can catch the
in gettingshopworn
fromtoo eyes of the power elite. A big executive takes a liking
muchroughhandling. to you. Will she also take a licking to you? Career:
Build your path to the very top through hard work
and political diligence. When all else fails, buy the
company and take over by force.
Aqu~rius(Jan.21-Feb.19)
Sex:You fall head over heels for an exotic delight. Will
you meet her close to home or on some faraway jaunt?
Keep your options open and, well, jaunty. Career:
Travel for business will bring extra rewards. And that
is more than just the padded expense account. Enjoy!
Pisces(Feb.2D-March20)
Sex:You are especially sexy now. Will you maximize
your allure and lure in the woman you truly desire or
60 Icurve
will you cast your net far and wide and trawl in any
and all? Let's guess. Career:Someone in power helps
you gain some power yoursel£ Use it for the corporate
good and not for evil and selfish gains. I guess we can
only hope.
Aries(March21-April20)
Sex:Keep a certain lady closely under surveillance.
It is not that your suspicions will be confirmed. It
is that her life is far more interesting than yours is
now. Career:Build up important relationships at
work. You never know who will get the upper hand
in the corporate chess game and you don't want to
be just another pawn.
Taurus(April21-May 21)
Sex:Find your next lovergrrl at work. Check out who
is percolating at the coffee machine and give her a
tour of your supply room. Career:Hard work will
bring its own rewards this September. But are these
particular rewards enough to encourage you to work
hard? Delegate where possible.
Gemini(May22-June21)
Sex:You are charming, flirty and very sexy right now.
Romance is in the air. Or is it dinner burning on the
stove? Career:Work is much more fun than usual.
Maybe that is because you are really working less and
getting away with it-for now.
cancer(June22-July 23)
Sex:There is a lot to be gained from reaching out to
family members now. Maximize your advantage by
pretending to compromise. But don't worry, you don't
really have to. Career:Develop your own political
cadre and see if you can take over the corporation.
Revolution or evolution? You decide.
Leo(July24-Aug.23)
Sex:Ask and you shall receive. Ask again and she will
be delighted. ]3ut don't push it. Keep expectations real.
Career:You are focused on the job and put all your
energies into it. Decisive action at work will get any
job done. But is that all there is to life? ■
Astrologer Charlene Lichtenstein is the
author ofHerscopes: A Guide to Astrology
for Lesbians. Get more at thestarryeye.com
orgo to her blogat thestarryeye.typepad.com.
~
Cl
~
....I
w
J:
()
~
OUTINFRONT
Community
Voices
These women spread the
activist word. By Sheryl Kay
says. "Not only is the general attitude queer,
phobic, it's even coded into law in some parts
of the state:'
Activism, she says, saved her. "For me, it's
just so obvious. Queer kids are getting beat
up, killing themselves and getting kicked out
of their homes. How the hell can you not do
something about it, if you're able tor"
MakingConnections
The LGBT community has to join with other
oppressed people including the poor, people of
color and new immigrants, says LindaStout.
"Only then can we build alliances strong
enough to overcome the powers working
against us;' she says. "None of us can do it
alone. We can't work separately and win:'
Stout grew up very poor in the rural south,
the daughter of a tenant farmer, and a 13th,
generation Quaker. The family didn't have a
bathroom or running water, notes Stout.
Hardest for her was living with all
the societal messages of "you're not good
Mississippi
Turning
Many readers will recall the case of Constance
McMillen, the brave young woman from
Mississippi. who challenged her school's
prom regulations by taking her girlfriend
(while wearing a tuxedo, no less). After briefly
cancelling the prom the school held another
prom that only McMillen and a student with
a developmental delay attended, while the
rest· of the student body attended a secret
dance held elsewhere.
What many of us didn't read about was the
Mississippi Safe Schools Coalition, and one of
its members, IzzyPellegrine,
who, in response
to the prom debacle, went to McMillen's
school district, and hosted a studen~s' rights
workshop and held a Second Chance Prom.
"Community involvement is something
I want to do for the rest of my life;' says
Pellegrine, a 20,year,old sophomore at
Mississippi State University. Ten years from
now, I hope to be post,doctorate and still
working towards policy change for LGBT
youth in Mississippi:'
Pellegrine knows there is still much work
in the South to be done. She was raised in
Jackson, Miss. and attended a very strict
Catholic school where she could have easily
been expelled for being an out lesbian. And the
overall community vibe wasn't much better.
"Honestly, it's ridiculous down here;' she
enough, not smart enough, not a whole
person;' eventually becoming something
she believed about herself. "Even though I
was never taught this from my family, I got
the messages ... everywhere else I went;' she
recalls. "Oppression in itself is bad enough,
but when it becomes internalized, it is the
hardest to overcome:'
Today Stout serves as the founder and
executive d1rector of Spirit in Action in
Belchertown, Mass., a national non,profit
organization that connects activists and others
who are passionate about working collectively
for lasting social change by offering leader,
ship and other networking programs. Keep
an eye out for her upcoming book, Collective
Visioning: Creating the World We Want to
Live In, a summary of ways to incorporate
62 j curve
=-------
-
- - - ---
positive actions into community activism
and daily life, and tools for building trust and
relationships.
FindingStrengthin Anger
She'll tell you her personality was shaped
by having activist parents, fantastic siblings
and by surviving a lot of bullying, teasing and
taunting when she was growing up.
Today, PamelaMerritt,is the Angry Black
Bitch. No judgments here. That's how Merritt
refers to herself, and her widely circulated
blog of the same name.
"If you're not angry, you are not paying
attention;' says Merritt, a St. Louis native
who also goes by Shark,fu. 'Tm angry at
injustice, at the thought of having the masses
vote in favor of or against my rights, poverty,
hunger, greed, ignorant politicians, valueless
family value voters and on and on and on:'
Blogging, says Merritt, is a lot like therapy,
only cheaper, and it provides her with a vehicle
where she can share her. online activism as
well as stories about her offiine activism.
"Immigrant rights, reproductive justice,
anti,racism and anti,poverty work are
all of concern· and all impact the LGBT
community;' she observes. "I stand in awe of
the work grassroots activists do every day to
represent and empower all LGBT people:'
Despite the challenges, Merritt has enough
faith in equality and social justice that she can
get up every morning believing that LGBT
Americans will be granted full protection
and civil rights within her lifetime.
"They call social justice movements
strugglesfor a reason;' she says. "I not only
reflect on how far we've come in so many
areas but I keep reminding myself that it
took time and dedication. Most importantly,
success demands faith in the outcome. And
I believe:' ■
a:
:5
5
~
_J
w
<(
I
()
~
_J
::,
a:
Trekking continued from page 47
admitted. I also loved it, despite crying out in
pain when the Ethiopian masseuse kneaded
my sore calves.
After dinner, we retired to the lounge for
• coffee and apple tobacco smoked from a
hookah. "Take a picture of me exhaling!" a
usually reserved Geri insisted. 'Tm telling
my kids it's Lebanese hasheesh!" Laughter
ricocheted along with tales of wild drug years
and college antics. Before retiring at midnight,
I had an"it can't get better than this" moment.
The group chemistry was electric.
DAY3: PETRAAND ISRAEL
At 5 a.m., the summon to prayer echoed
from loudspeakers in mosque minarets,
jarring me from sleep. Another day_of travel
began early, and by. mid-morning we were
in Petra, a sixth century B.C. Nabataean
city carved out of rock. Descending the
ravine to the rose-hewed stone temple that
was featured in the film Indiana Jones and
The Last Crusade, horse-drawn carts raced
madly across the stone floor, with dozens of
Jordanian men riding donkey and horseback
and tchocthke-hawkers swarming.
The BBC describes Petra as 'one of the ten
places you have to see before you die:'I concur.
The scale and historical imprint were indelible.
We hiked through the vast city and climbed
a miles-long trail to the ancient sacrificial
altar atop the Temple plateau. Once there, we
spontaneously shed hiking boots and undulated gleefully to the sound of a local Bedouin
woman's flute playing.
During the eight hours we scaled Petra,
I noticed Robin, who had nearly given up
two days ago, had quickened her pace. "I feel
stronger;' she smiled. Two hours later,
we were at the Israeli border undergoing
stringent security checks. On the Israeli side,
I joined the group at their hotel for our final
communal meal: tradition~ Sabbath dinner.
The group would trek Israel's southern desert
the next day, but professional commitments
beckoned me back to Tel Aviv.
Some of us received Hebrew blessings
over the wine and bread, a Russian singer
wearing go-go boots and silver sequined
miniskirt crooned '80s tunes in the hotel
lobby. It was surreal.
After dinner I found it tough saying goodbye. I wanted to continue with the group
despite the grueling hikes ahead. I hated to
break my bond with the others.
En route to Tel Aviv,I remembered something Judy had explained in Petra earlier that
day. "These trips are conducive to laughter
and interaction. We share something you
can't share with anyone else and form bonds
we'll always have in common:' Months later,
as I draw on memories and reply to an e-mail
from one of my distant traveling friends, I
realize she was right. ■
TOP150QUEER
WOMEN
PHOTO
CREDITS:
AndrewSoutham
(2),
DanaEdelson
(4),BoValentine/filmmagic
(5),RobinRoemer
(6),
NaomiKaltman/Showtime
(7),VirginiaSherwood
(8),ChadSlattery
(12),NaomiKaltman/Showtime
(13),MatthiasClamer/FOX
(14),
JudyFrancesconi
(15),VirginiaSherwood
(17),CharlieGowins(22),
Pamela
Littky(27),
LeslieVanStelten(28),AndrewMacpherson
(29),
MontyBrinton(32),TonyDonaldson/tdphoto.com
(33),BeckStarr
(36),PaulMichaud/Showtime.
(39),KerryKrenzin
(42),Courtesy
Food
Network
(44),LaceyTerrell(49),JamesSorensen/2008
CrownMedia
(51), RyanForbes
(53),JaimieTrueblood
(55),AustinYoung(56),
JeriHeiden(60),makoto2007
(61),JDDisalvatore
(65),RheaAnna
(67),Olivia(70),RogerErickson/FOX
(71),AbigailCruz(72),Luciana
Pampalone
(73),CharlieHopkins/Time
Warner(74),MontyBriton(75),
BrettPatterson
(77),DavidCooper
(78),ZackArias/Usedfilm
(80),
ChrisBaldwin(82),MariaSchriber
(84),George
Napolitano
(85),David
Fenton
(86),RupertTaper(87),AnthonyMandler(93),LydiaDaniller
(94),FrankieFrankeny
(95),SylvainGaboury
(96),LisaSandor(100)
__.)
make your Africandreamscometrue.
r r)nt
11f)
Ht
rJ'
I
•
1
I
dr
lrJ,
,d
1
,1tdJ
111
r,'
1,
1+,
Iii
,f ,,
,1
1
1
sublime
JOU
E
l .877.805.7969
disco 1er u lim
September 2010 f
TOPTENREASONS
WELOVE
...
Jeanne
C6rdova
By Victoria A. Brownworth
A lesbian activist, writer, ex-nun and social worker, Jeanne Cordova has spent her
adult life championing the rights of lesbians. Her upbringing, as the daughter of
a strong New York Irish mother and a social justice-oriented Mexican American
father, led her to think she could do anything. She is the author of an upcoming
memoir and an organizer of the Butch Voices Conference to be held Oct. 8-10 in
Los Angeles. Cordova has all the traits we love in a butch-and
1. She'sa cross-gendered
loverofwomen."My
earliest oppression is being cross-gendered;'
explains Cordova. She defines herself as
having been born a woman yet identifying
with her masculine side, too. "I like my boi
clothes and style:'
2. Sheusedto be a nun.After high school,
"I was there at the start
of a new movement
being born within the
great family of LGBT
people, but here the
B stands for butch."
64
Icurve
then some.
6. Shehelpedorganize
ButchVoices.
The first
conference was held in 2009 in Oakland,
Cali£ Cordova lead the organization of
the L.A. conference. She explains that the
conference was an awakening for her. "I
was there at the start of a new movement
being born within the great family of LGBT
people, but here the B stands for butch:'
Cordova joined the Sisters of the Immaculate
Heart of Mary, an order that was dedicated to the radical changes of Vatican II,
and that protested the Vietnam War. She
wrote about her experiences in the convent
in her first memoir, Kicking the Habit-A
Lesbian Nun Story. She was also included in
a groundbreaking collection Lesbian Nuns:
Breaking Silence.
Her partner just turned 49 and Cordova is
acutely aware that growing older is different_
for femmes than it is for butches. She thinks
femmes are made to feel less lesbian because
of their appearance and looks, when they
are actually fighting a different kind of
homophobia, in the workplace and beyond.
3. She'sa life-longactivist.Post-convent she
8. She's concernedaboutthe inclusionof
became the president of the Los Angeles
chapter of the Daughters of Bilitis, the first
lesbian rights organization in the country. As
queerness mainstreamed, so did she, becoming
president of the Stonewall Democratic Club,
where she led the statewide campaign in
California to elect 88 openly gay delegates to
the i980 Democratic National Convention.
Latinasin the LGBTcommunity.
Half Latina,
Cordova wants Latinas to feel included
in all things LGBT. "Racism and ethnic
tensions easily divide us as a community;'
Cordova says.
7. Sheaddresses
theoppression
offemmes.
9. Shecreditstransgender
peoplefor raising
her butchconsciousness.
Before the Butch
Voices Conference, Cordova says she "never
4. Sheisdedicated
toendingbutchoppression. in my life got to rejoice and embrace being
Cordova feels that butch oppression is largely butch. It was not until transgender people
ignored, and notes that many butch women
opened the door that it was truly OK for
don't get jobs because they are obviously queer women to be masculine-that
it could be a
in the workplace. She feels that these issues for natural part of who you are."
butch women have yet to be addressed in the
LGBT community.
1 O. She'ssurvivedbreastandcoloncancer.
At 61, Cordova's taken on cancer and beat
5. She's an entrepreneurand a social it the way she's taken on so many issues in
worker.Cordovagot her master's degree her life. She's currently in remission, which
in social work at age 22 and wrote
means she can fight with
_her dissertation
on community
g{isto. "I feel stronger
2010 BUTCHVOICES
organizing in the lesbian community,
REGIONAL
CONFERENCES now. I'm buoyed up
despite her thesis advisor's denial
by the prospect of
New York,Sept.25
that such a community existed. She
the conference and
Portland,Ore.,Oct.2
also founded the Community Yellow
by the things to come
Los Angeles,Oct.8-1 O
Pages, which she ran until 1999.
in my life:' ■
JULY 31-AUGUST 7, 2010
Sweet Hawaiian Islands Cruise
Let's explore paradise together this summer.
UGUST 16-21, 2010
eet Salnwn Ri,a,er Rafti,ng
un, sun and friendship as we laugh our way
gorgeous Salmon River In Idaho.
1, 2010
l Pa~e
Resort
JULY 21-31, 2011
Sweet M~hu Pi.emu Ad'Venture
Immerse yourself In the myths, legends and history of the Inca.
CA[
877 793 3830
DISCO
R SWEET.COM
CST#2091766-40
See all items with this value
-
7
25274 80539 6
CAMPVEGAS'"
BRID6ESTORE
Sure, it's just a tire.
Like the Grand Canyon is just a big crack.
•
••
Up
GIT
los100
\IALUE
Vt\
BACK*
on anAmericanExpress®
brandedprepaidrewardcardby mail
whenyoubuya set of four eligibletBridgestoneDuelertires.
OffervalidSept.2throughOct.2, 2010.Forthe nearestBridgestoneretailer,call 1-877-TIRE
USA. •
*Reward
Card
canbeused
virtual~
anyM',efe
American
Express9
Cards
arewelcome
intheU.S.
asdetailed
atwww.rewardearrer.com/oodgestone;
valid
forupto6months;
card
isixiint-based
andnotredeemable
forcash.
Card
issued
inthename
submitted
onofficial
claim
form;
cannot
beissued
tominors;
nottransferrable.
Usage
restrictions,
guidelines,
terms
andconditions
apply.
Card
issued
bylnteliSpend
Prepaid
Solutions,
LLC.
ffiresmust
bepurchased
from
aparticipating
Bridgestone
retailer's
inventory
between
Sept2andOct.
2,2010.
Mail-in
claim
form
required.
Certain
restrictions
andlimitations
apply.
See
your
participating
Bridgestone
retailer
forcomplete
details.
Offer
excludes
Costco
purchases.
Fordriverswho want to get the mostout of theircars,
IT'SBRIDGESTONE
ORNOTHING.
ll::.III.IIE=ILIE=l!I.II~
bridgestonetire.comtiresafety.com
PASSION
for EXCELLENCE
Features SEPTEMBER
2010
24
The Supermodel is Back, Baby!
Jenny Shimizu has come a long way since
her runway days and famous dalliances.
We catch up with the queer icon 14 years
after she last graced our cover. By Lauren
Marie Fleming
26
150 Most Desirable Queer Women
The votes are in! Daniela Sea and Portia di
Rossi are on it. Are your other favorites? Find
out which sexy ladies made the cut.
30
Annette Bening Goes Gay
The actor talks about what it's like to play
house with Julianne Moore in The Kids Are
All Right. Plus, we chat with director Lisa
Cholodenko. By Kristin A. Smith
50
Derby Grrls
We hit the rink.with some of the real life.
Whip It girls. By Lisa Gunther
32
25 Placesto FindYourself
A Lesbian Tour of Las Vegas
Fun in America's lesbian playground.
By Lauren Marie Fleming
34
Not Just For Spring Break
Lesbian Olympics, snorkeling and pool
parties-a lesbian vacation in Cancun,
Mexico. By Diane Anderson-Minshall
36
Riding the rails: Love Stories
Train trips across the U.S., Canada and
Europe. By Victoria A. Brownworth, Lauren
Marie Fleming and Jennifer Pare/lo
37
Great Weekend Getaways
Fun short trips from Rehoboth Beach to
a tour of gay L.A. By Fay Jacobs and
Mary McGrath
~
~
a:
w
I
40
(/)
Hot Homo-friendly Hotels
a:
Five gay-friendly hotels you'll love. Plus,
why you should play the slots at this LGBTinclusive casino. By Staff
~
>z
z
6
£2.
~
::,
0
CD
<{
CJ
z
~
>(/)
<ii
~
zw
~
w
t:i
z
~
w
::i
(/)
w
...J
21
curve
g
Impressionism is the second most injluential movement this paintin9 was part of
A TOLERANT WORLD IS A WORK IN PROGRESS. But we're getting there. At Progressive,we/
believe in respecting all people and finding beauty in their differences. It's just one way we live
up to our name. To learn more about our Works in Progressinitiative, visit progressive.com/lgbt.
ProgressiveCasualty Ins Co and its affiliates, Mayfield Village, OH. 10D00056 (06/10)
PROGR£JI/V£
Departments SEPTEMBER
2010
Jl
•
•
IN EVERY ISSUE
18
6
Relationships: Loving long distance.
What to do when your heart spans borders.
Frankly Speaking
19
Money: Stop fighting about money. Six
8
9
Letters
10
16
60
62
64
expert tips for financial intimacy.
::,
LL.
Contributors, Scene
This is What a Lesbian Looks Like
(/)
20
AstroGrrl
22
Top Ten Reasons We Love ...
-
Curvatures
Lady Sovereign officially joins our
team! Kate Moss and Courtney
Love? Plus, who cares about the
Kagan rumors?
54
56
58
-
-
t:i:
~
fz
0
Politics
(/)
~
Why teaching is a powerful activist tool.
Out in Front
Celebrity Gossip
<{
I
Dyke Drama
Separate but unequal. Give us our wedding
stress, difficult divorces and rights already!
Lipstick & Dipstick
Shoes and ties- new dyketastic
accessories for the fall. Why kids
of lesbians do better, and Queen
Latifah's at the center of gaydar.
14
~
(/)
(/)
0
52
12
@'
~
.
•
-
Music: Back to our roots (music) with the
still fabulous Cyndi Lauper, Norwegian stars
Katzenjammer and Nola-infused Sabrina
Chap. Plus, Patty Larkin's new album.
Books: Pam Grier's new Foxy memoir
()
~
...J
LU
z
<t
0
~
(/)
LU
[::!
z
<t
I
<t
r
a.
0
(/)
and Streb's lessons on becoming an action
hero. Plus, the Moregasmgirls.
c5
Film: Sexy lesbo noir TheOwlsand making
Cl
babies without men. Plus, our fave toon Daria
is back. And a Q&A with director Alison Reid.
LU
LU
Tech: How gay-friendly is your cell phone
company? Also, 10 terrific lesbian Tweeters.
Ii:
LU
...J
z
~
«f
a:
LU
~~
z
<t
0
a:
Q
4
Icurve
Valeria
Solarino, the
heteroflexible ~
queen of new
Italian Cinema
The Newest Italian Lesbian Film
....J
:i:
c..
::j
Valeria Solarino talks to us about her new Italian lesbian film,
Sea Purple. In it, Solarino plays a young woman growing up in
Sicily during the 19th century and dealing with her sexuality.
~.
~~~~LJJ
b
~
LJJ
~
Ten Powerful Queers Under 21
~
~
0
~
Cl)
<t
Cl
a:
Q.
LJJ
~
Across the country, youth activists are leading the fight toward
LGBT equality. From Constance McMillen's very public prom
battle to the leaders of local chapters of the Gay Straight
Alliances, young people are helping to create a more equitable
and just world. Here are ten youth who are making a difference.
~
a:
0
~z
::::>
ID
a:
0
(!)
a:
Orgasmic Pregnancy
Authors Danielle Cavallucci and Yvonne K. Fulbright of Your
Orgasmic Pregnancy: Little Secrets Every Hot Mama Should
Know offer up five tips on how to keep your oven hot, even
when there's a bun in it.
LJJ
0
~
<t
6
z
a:
:5
(/)
a:
LJJ
(!)
Caster Semenya may be getting a bum deal, as critics debate
her "female-hood."Alison Steinberg tackles the gender issue.
Stunt Woman Turned Filmmaker Alison Reid
There are only so many ways we can say hot.
a:
z
<t
6
[ij
~
z
LJJ
t::!
....J
ii:
LJJ
~
Gender in Mainstream Professional Sports
0
0
Caster
Semenya
and the role
of gender in
sports
Ghost Hunting at the Mission Inn Hotel
One lesbian's paranormal tale from the Riverside, Calif. hotel
(and the catacombs beneath it), where the Nixons married and
Reagons honeymooned.
Who can say no to
Jenny Shimizu? We
couldn't, but alas, if
anyone could make us
think twice, it'd be sexy
Brooklyn singer Fiona
Silver. Who's your fave?
Email letters@curvemag.com.
COVERSMACKDOWN
:c
(.)
September 2010
I5
FRANKLY
SPEAKING
Step Intothe HonestyBox
We've just spent the last six months surveying
lesbians (ages 16 to 86) of all cultural, political
and spiritual backgrounds, from large metros to
small towns across the country. The one thing you
all agreed on, is the importance of having a lesbian
magazine-in print and on the web. Here's where
I admit the horrible truth: without your help, in
the form of a subscription or even an outright gift
or donation, that might not continue.
Sadly, it's been a really tough couple of years
here at curve. Like all of you, we're still feeling
the economic crunch. For magazines of all sizes,
sales in bookstores and newsstands are down,
subscription sales are down and the number of
people renewing their subscriptions is down-that's
as true for us as it is
for Newsweek or any other mainstream magazine. I get it, really. When it's
between dinner and a magazine, reading is much further down on the list of
Maslov's hierarchy of needs.
But curve has always strived to be more than a mere magazine. We aim
to be a community, a rare place among all the cacophony, where queer women
can hear our own voices, where we celebrate all the parts of our lives, not just
our sexuality. And, like a few feminist and progressive organizations, we're
choosy about who we allow to advertise in the magazine. Beauty and fashion
ads are rare, tobacco and fur ads are forbidden. Why, when we need money
so badly, would we turn away an advertiser? Because we know you are loyal
to our advertisers: A full 90 percent of you said you're likely to buy from a
company that advertises in curve or curvemag.com.
Right now, curve is celebrating our 20th anniversary in print, and, though
we've cut costs everywhere, we're questioning whether we'll make it to our
21st. We've been through this before twice in curve history (many of you
were along with us as we battled a lawsuit in the early '90s) so we know what
we're experiencing is survivable-especially by such crafty dykes-but we just
can't do it anymore without outside support. So, how can you help?
+ Buy a subscription for yourself or your girlfriend (or better yet, all your
friends, the LGBT community center and your local library).
+ Send curve a donation. Vote for lesbian media with your wallet. We've
made it easy. You can PayPal money to us at publisher@curvemag.com. We
won't sell your name to anyone, and nobody but our accountant sees your
information. It's as anonymous as you want it to be (but if you like, we'll thank
you in print!).
+ Turn your next barbecue or TV viewing party into an in-house, DIY
fundraiser (we'll send you magazines).
+ Start a curve fundraising campaign in your hometown ( a marathon?
baseball playoff? bake-sale?).
+ And finally, please, come to next month's Curve 20th Anniversary Gala
and meet some of the celebrities and everyday women who have supported
curve over the years. It's a fundraiser that'll help usher us into 2011.
Just remember, we can't do it without your help. Now.
£~
6
Icurve
curve
THE BEST-SELLING
SEPTEMBER 2010
I
LESBIAN MAGAZINE
VOLUME 20 NUMBER 7
Publisher and Founder Frances Stevens
EDITORIAL
Editor in Chief Diane Anderson-Minshall
Managing Editor Kristin A. Smith
Associate Editor Rachel Shatto
Book Review Editor Rachel Pepper
Music Review Editor Margaret Coble
Contributing Editors Julia Bloch, Victoria A. Brownworth,
Gina Daggett, Sheryl Kay, Gretchen Lee, Stephanie Schroeder
Copy Editor Katherine Wright
EditorialAssistants Lisa Gunther, Liska Koenig, Anna Belle Peterson,
Eleni Stephanides, Nicole Vermeer
PUBLISHING
Director of Operations Flo Enriquez
Senior Advertising Executive Diana L Berry
Advertising Sales Rivendell Media
Marketing Assistant Rose Tachis, Sarah C. Jimenez
ART
/PRODUCTION
Art Director Stefanie Liang
Photo Editor Hayley McMillen
Production Manager Ondine Kilker
Production Artist Kelly Nuti
Web Producer Nikki Woelk
Photo Assistant Cathryn Lovecraft
CONTRIBUTING
WRITERS
Jamie Anderson, Melany Joy Beck, Rachel Beebe, Kathy Beige,
Stacy Bias, Kelsy Chauvin, Bree Clarke, Jennifer Corday, Lyndsey
D'Arcangelo, Beren deMotier, Ainsley Drew, Michele Fisher, Lauren
Marie Fleming, Katrina Fox, Serena Freewomyn, Ash Goddard,
Tania Hammidi, Kathi lsserman, Gillian Kendall, Kate Lacey, Sheela
Lambert, Charlene Lichtenstein, Karen Loftus, Sassafras Lowrey,
Ariel Messman-Rucker, Candace Moore, Alison Peters, Catherine
Plato, Aimsel L. Ponti, Heather Robinson, Laurie K. Schenden, Lori
Selke, Dave Steinfeld, Edie Stull, Robin Miner-Swartz, Yana TallonHicks, Kyra Thomson, Jocelyn Voo, Jamie Wetherbe
CONTRIBUTING
ILLUSTRATORS
& PHOTOGRAPHERS
Paul Michael Aguilar, Erica Beckman, Brie Childers, Meagan
Cignoli, Cheryl Craig, JD Disalvatore, Tony Donaldson, Sophia
Hantzes, Cheryl Mazak, Maggie Parker, Elisa Shebaro, Leslie Van
Stelten, Katherine Streeter, Kina Williams, Misty Winter
1550 Bryant Street, Suite 510
San Francisco, CA 94103
Phone (415) 863-6538 Fax (415) 863-1609
Advertising Sales (415) 863-6538 ext. 15
Subscription Inquiries (800) 705-0070 International (818) 286-3102
Advertising Email advertising@curvemag.com
Editorial Email editor@curvemag.com
Letters to the Editor Email letters@curvemag.com
Volume 20 Issue 7 Curve (ISSN 1087-867)() is published monthly (except for bimonthly
January/February and July/August) by Outspoken Enterprises, Inc., 1550 Bryant St.,
Ste. 510, San Francisco, CA 94103. Subscription price: $49.95/year, $62.95 Canadian
(U.S. funds only) and $71.95 international (U.S. funds only). Returned checks will be
assessed a $25 surcharge. Periodicals postage paid at San Francisco, CA 94114 and
at additional mailing offices (USPS 0010-355). Contents of Curve Magazine may not be
reproduced in any manner, either whole or in part, without written permission from the
publisher. Publication of the name or photograph of any persons or organizations appearing,
advertising or listing in Curve may not be taken as an indication of the sexual orientation
of that individual or group unless specifically stated. Curve welcomes letters, queries,
unsolicited manuscripts and artwork. Include SASE for response. lack of any representation
only signifies insuffJCientmaterials. Submissions cannot be returned unless a self-addressed
stamped envelope is included. No responsibility is assumed for loss or damages. The
contents do not necessarily represent the opinions of the editor, unless specifically stated. All
magazines sent discreetly. Subscription Inquiries: Please write to Curve, 1550 Bryant Street,
Suite 510, San Francisco, CA 94103, email shop@curvemag.com. Canadian Agreement
Number: 40793029. Postmaster:Send Canadianaddresschangesto shop@curvemag.com,
Curve,
PO Box 122, Niagara Falls, ON L2E 6S8. SendU.S. addresschangesto shop@curvemag.com,
. Curve,PO Box 17138,N. Hollywood,
CA 91615-7138.Printedin the U.S.
curvemag.com
>:c
a.
~
(!l
5
:c
a.
_)
LU
ID
<(
::E
od
LU
Cl
:;:)
a:
ti:
LU
(!l
LmERS
The WrightStuff
Thank you for the article, "She's a Little Bit
Country" [Vol. 20#5] on Chely Wright.
There are still many gays and lesbians who
feel trapped in their closeted existence, but
by Chely coming out so publicly, others will
follow. Each time a famous person takes a
big risk and comes out, it helps the rest of us.
Many of us who share a similar background
with Chely have experienced the same fear,
heard the same sermons in church and felt the
same shame. I appreciate Chely so much. I had
the opportunity to meet her in Kansas City,
Mo. recently and she was simply fantastic.
- VetaBordeaux,OklahomaCity, Okla.
As a mom of a lesbian, I am interested in
knowing if Chely Wright suffered a lot of
fallout from her coming out story written by
Diane Anderson-Minshall. I hope her mom
is accepting of her lesbianism and steps up to
let Chely know she is a wonderful person who
happens to be a lesbian. The article made me
sad, happy and angry. I am so sorry that Chely
has had to go through so much torment and
struggle. She sounds like a great person with
standards any parent would be proud 0£ I
enjoy your magazine. Keep up the good work.
trust that the last 'couple
of sentences don't mislead
anyone, because _I do not
regret having my daughter
first-I love, am grateful
for and appreciate Adrian
as much as her children
and was happy to see
them all included. I find
Erica Beckman's pictures
arresting and illustrative.
That direct daylight sure
brings out every wrinkle,
but
that's
only me
looking my age, which,
thanks to Old Lesbians
Organizing for Change
(OLOC), I have learned
to appreciate. Kudos for
the article and for your
exceedingly readable and
attractive mag-a service
to lesbians of every age.
I wantto get
24% Hawaii.
lei'd.
events so we can find out
how we can help. We are
not just about partying-we
have social consciences and
that "call to action" response
that comes from having to
fight for our own rights.
France.
14% Paris,
It's gayPareefor me.
-Kristin Rothenberger,
Bloomfield,NJ.
outback.
13% Australian
Tofind myCrocodile
TacklingToughSubjects
Poll
What's your dream
vacation destination?
Dundeena.
Thank you so much for
publishing
the "LesbianLondon,England.
on-Lesbian Rape" article by
I can'tresistthose
Britishbirds.
Victoria A. Brownworth
on curvemag.com. This is
LasVegas.
Sapphicsin city.
the first time I have seen
an article about woman-toPhuket,
Thailand.
Beaches,
beverages
woman sexual violence. Until
andbeautifullesbians.
it happened to me, I didn't
RiodeJaneiro,Brazil.
think it was possible. Even .
Carnaval
hereI come.
after it happened, I didn't
think it was rape until I saw a
Reykjavik,
Iceland.
Lezziepresident,
-Alix Dobkin,
counselor who specialized in
yesplease.
Woodstock,N.Y.
treating survivors of same-sex
CapeTown,South
domestic violence. I still don't
Africa.SapphicSafari
Tried and True
talk about it to many people,
adventure.
Wedding Tips
even
though it happened
According
to a curvemag.com
poll
over seven years ago. It's
I just wanted to thank
Serena Freewomyn, writer of "Have Your something that is rarely acknowledged
Wedding Cake and Eat It, Too" [Vol. or discussed, just as domestic violence in
20#3], for finally helping out the ladies
lesbian relationships is rarely acknowledged.
who don't know how to plan their
Thank you for writing this and helping
those of us who are survivors feel less alone.
wedding. I loved the article and did almost
-Posted by purplebutterjlyon curvemag.com
everything to the letter. It cost my partner
and me $3,000 to pull off our special day.
Editor's
Note:Go to curvemag.com
to see moreof
- Tina Dwight, Kansas City, Mo.
11%
10%
10°/o
8%
6%
4%
Kudosfor Oil Spill Coverage
Ijust finished reading"The Devil Went Down
to Louisiana" about the Gulf Oil disaster on
curvemag.com. I want to commend you for
putting together an article that is unbiased
and very comprehensive in its presentation
of all the issues around this tragedy. It is
important that our community gets an
objective look at this and other current
award-winninginvestigative
journalistVictoria
A. Bro~nworth's
Jive-partserieson hiddensocial
issuesimpactingthe lesbiancommunity.
Corrections:In "Our Stores, Our Lives;'
Giovanni's Room co-founders should have
been listed as Tom Weinberg, Danny Sherbo
and Pat Hill. Amy Andre co-authored
Bisexual Health. Aynee 0. Joujon-Roche
fronts The Restless Blues Band.
-Nancy Schroeder,Kenosha,Wis.
Dobkinon Dobkin
I very much enjoyed reading Rene Rosechild's
well-written, mostly accurate (I met Liza
months after leaving my husband) article
"Telling the Tale" [Vol. 20#5]. I have to
s Icurve
Sendletters
to:curve magazine
1550Bryant
St.,Ste.510SanFrancisco,
CA94103
WRITE
TOCURVE!
Subscriber
Services
arenowavailable
at
curvemag.corn/customerservice:
EMAIL:
letters@curvemag.com• subscribe
FAX:415-863-1609
• renew
GOTO:curvemag.com/letters • payyourbill
• getmissing
issues
• change
address
• givea gift
CONTRIBUTORS
"Did someone say roller derby? Hot!" says KinaWilliams,about the
opportunity to photograph Derby Grrls at the historic Oaks Park
Roller Rink in Portland, Ore. (pg. 50). "I spent almost my entire sixth
and seventh grades on roller skates, and I've finally gotten back on them;.'
Williams admits proudly. The new surge of leagues throughout the
country and the sharp increase in mainstream popularity, drew her to
this project to help insure that queer derby grrls remain visible. Williams
has recently taken over ownership of The Hideout Photography Forum
and blog, and is working on a <;:onceptualgallery project for 2011.
From the Editor
Ever have one of
those days when
everything goes
wrong? That's
been our whole
When curve editorial assistant LiskaKoenigisn't busy banging
on Japanese taiko drums or writing anything and everything we
throw her way (she penned the Intern's Pick on Joan Jett, pg.
52), she loves to enjoy her morning coffee at the beach and cook
scrumptious German meals for her friends. She assures us that
she is not a Hasselhoff fan, but we've heard "Hooked on a Feeling"
coming from her cubicle ... twice. We never want her to leave.
month at curve.
First, copy chief
Katherine Wright
was taken down
by a tennis game:
a broken hip hospitalized her
during production. So, if you see
"If words could describe my time at curve, I wouldn't need
typos here, please forgive us.
to lug around this camera;' says contributing photographer and
former photography assistant BrittanyJeffers.An explorer of all
things fun and unique,Jeffers, a Hawaii native, finds her inspiration
through experiencing new places and people. Jeffers' photographs
have appeared in many curve issues, including her portrait of
SF Pride director Amy Andre in the June issue. Jeffers aspires to
have her photography contribute to continuing the progression of
LGBT rights and other causes around the world.
Also, our German-native editorial
assistant Liska Koenig's work
visa ran out. Then, when things .
couldn't get worse, we had a
major meltdown of our computer
server. For about 24 hours, as
we prepped to go to press, the
backup server-that
hosts all of
the magazine's files from 1990
on -went
kaput. Talk about
techie hysteria. Thankfully, our
production guru Ondine Kilker
and a couple of computer geeks
(thanks Randy and Bill) came
to our rescue and we managed
to save our 20 years of work,
and get this issue out to you.
1 Pride superstars(fromleft):FoxyladyPam
Grier,curve founderFrancesStevens,
funny
girl DanaGoldberg
and TheRealL WordsMikey
Koffman2 Partygoers
at L.A.'sLesbianAttack3
GLAAD
Awardsgirls(fromleft):Clementine
Ford,
CybillShepherd,curve's senioradvertising
executiveDianaBerry,singerChelyWright
4 OurSanFranciscoPridefloat clebrating
20 yearsof publishing5 Freedomto Marry
protestorsin Minnesota6 Volunteers
at L.A.
HarveyMilk Daycelebration
But, if you happen to be a major
shareholder in Apple, spread the
word: I think a big equipment
upgrade will top our holiday wish
list this year!
~
Diane Anderson-Minshall
Editor in Chief
September 2010
I9
1
_Agricultural activist and organic
grocer Kelly Clark cops to a shoe
addiction, a passion for organic
food and a love of heady women.
Which Sneaker Is Right For You?
Our editors take to the pavement with these cool kicks.
SHOE TerraPlanaLucy
RYKA
Womens's
UltimaRun
USE Everydayuse.Sinceit's ultra
A stablerunningshoe,perfect
light andflexibleit makesa great for neutralrunners,walkersand
clumsylesbians.
travelshoe.
spreads RYKAis theonlyperformance
SPECIAL VivoBarefoottechnology
footwearcompany
dedicated
FEATURE yourtoeswideandflat, theway
weweremeantto be.Youfeel
likeyou'rewalkingbarefoot,
withoutthefearof pointyobjects,
filthystreetsor yourpeeling
pedicure.
makesecosexy.
SEXY TerraPl.ana
FACTOR Thesebabiesaremadewith
recycledmaterialsanddesigned
for posturealignment,butstill
superhipandurban.
exclusively
to women,which
meanstheirshoesfit us
better-Narrowheel,widefoot,
lateralguidance
supportshank
for stability.
Youtradearchsupport,
breathable
meshandexcellent
tractionfor sexappeal.
Reebok
Easytone
Reeinspire
NewBalance
759
Everyday
use.Thesecomfy
kicksmakethe worldyour
personaltrainer.
Goodfor shorterrunsandroad
races,because
of its lightweight
andflexibility.
Airpodsontheballof thefoot
andhealcausesmildinstability
whichyourmuscles
workto
compensate,
resultingin a work
outfor yourlegs.Andaccording
to theads,theabilityto make
yourboobsjealousof yourbutt.
Stabilitywebdesignandshock
absorbingheel,meansthat
youget a light-weightshoe
with enoughstabilityto carry
youthrougha roadrace.Shoe
hassnugfit, so it is perfectfor
narrowerfeet.
Theycomein a varietyof colors
includingdiscotheque-friendly
gold,soyoudon'thaveto forfeit
glamourin yourquestfor the
superiorposterior.
It's a runningshoe,sobyits
nature,kindalow.Buttheaqua
tonesare.nice.
Youmightget
the attentionof the hot locker
roomdyke.
SUPERHEROWalkingonwater,or at least
POWER feelinglikeyoucould.
Speedbaby.You'llfeellikeMarion Bouncing
quartersmile-highoff
Jonesin notime.
youreasy-toned
bum
Lightening
speed.I bestedmy
5Ktimein these.
andstylish
SAYS You'rea conscious
ABOUTYOU dyke.
Youcareaboutyourfeetmore
thananyoneon TheL Word.
Youwantthe gymbunnybooty
withoutthegymbunnyfees.
Youlivein thefast lane.
Passingonyourleft.
$60(ryka.com)
$125(reebok.com)
$95 (newbalance.com)
PRICE $125(terraplana.com)
..
::J
w
::,
(!J
~
The Sole of San Miguel
z
~
en
a:
w
~
I first heard about the fabulous footwear
of San Miguel Shoe in the tiny village of
Ajijic, near in central Mexico. A welldressed, well-traveled Canadian woman
assured me that the sandal with three-inchwide elastic straps is the most comfortable
shoe for maneuvering Mexico's treacherous
cobblestone streets, and suggested I visit the
factory store (smshoe.com)when I reached
San Miguel de Allende.
In the flagship shop, located appropriately
off a narrow cobblestone lane, my selection
of brown slides were dropped by a clerk from
the second floor overhang like manna from
heaven. Inside, Martha Muniz a.k.a. the
Sandal Lady sat at her desk smiling, ready for
primetime. Despite her rumored penchant
for eccentric dress and daring col~ choices,
including Paris Hilton-esque bright pink,
that day she was looking sedate in navy blue.
Since then, my one-strap sandals have
become my favorite on uneven terrain, and
have served me well on the dusty cracked
streets of Chiang Mai, Thailand as well as
on the mean concrete streets of New York
City. They're a must for any world-traveling
woman. [Carole
Terwilliger
Meyers]
::?
a:
w
(!)
::J
..J
~w
1-
w
..J
0
~
()
[i]
w
l-
b
J:
u.i
z
<(
8
en
~
::J
..J
~
~
52
ej
~
~
~
a:
w
J:
()
a:
::,
N
~0
(.)
z
The· Hot Girls Are Tying One On
6
g:
~
(.)
~
00
i
z
~
~
~
Detroit-based Cyberoptix Tie Lab have
been making sexy dyke accessories since
2006. From power-dykes to riot grrrls, these
colorful handprinted ties are the perfect
addition. It's owner Bethany Shorb's mission
to bring "punky fashion statement for
executives bound to the neck noose, and
a sharply-styled alternative for those
who don't need to wear a tie, but
choose to do so:' Coming
from one of the country's
largest eco-friendly print
shops, Cyberoptix ties are
hand-made to order from
rehashed vintage, resulting
in colorful, snarkily designed
neckwear that won't make
feel like you' re wearing
grandpa's old duds.
Low prices, hot
gender-bending
photo shoots and
playfully-named prints like "Fool's Gold;'
"Terminal Illness" (an homage to Swine Flu)
and an X-ray print called "Skeletie" will have
you happily sporting neck ties, on and off the
clock. Shorb is especially happy to see her
LGBT clients wearing her ties. "We proudly
support human rights for everyone
and aren't afraid to say so. If it
scares a few conservative clients
away, they can shop elsewhere:'
We'd let Shorb tie us up any day.
[YanaTallon-Hicks]
d
(/)
a:
w
~a:
co
0
r
The Gaydar
!z
Here's a taste of lesbians in pop culture this month.
Who missed the mark and who was right on target?
~
0
~
0
(/)
a.
::J
u..
::J
u.
(.)
SN
~
:i:
fa,
:.::
8
a:
(.)
..J
w
<(
I
(.)
~
g
a:
w
Q;,
z
~w
:::E
:::E
::>
(/)
<(
:::E
:::E
w
~
~
@_
0
a:
~
..J
~
5
~
w
::J
Lesbian musician Bitch
was pulled at the last
moment from Oregon's
OUT/LOUD
queer women's
music festival,which
she had been booked to
headline. The unanimous
decision came after the
festivalbecame aware of comments she'd
previously made to the media that they felt
were transphobic ... "I Kissed a Girl's"Katy
Penyhas condemned
Lady Gaga's'i\lejandro"
video on her Twitter
account, saying,"using
blasphemy as entertainment is as cheap as a
comedian telling a fart
joke''... A new study
published in TheJoumal
of Pediatricsshows
that children raised in lesbian families have
higher self-esteem, more confidence, do better
academicallyand also are less likely to have
behavioral problems, such as rule-breaking
and aggression... Illinois state
treasurer AlexGiannoulias
has
signedan executiveorder providing
gay and lesbianstate employees
the same familyleavebenefits
extended to their heterosexual
married co-workers.This includes
12 weeks of unpaid leave to care
for a sick partner or relative,as well as the
opportunity to take time off for the adoption
or birth of a child... LGBT groups in Hawaii
were outraged after the
state Gov.LindaLlngle's
veto of a bill that would
have recognized same-sex
couples in civil unions
in the state-eight
years after promising
she would not ... Arlene
Ramery,
a lesbian and former NYPDcop, has
filed a $40 million suit against the City of
NewYork,saying that sexual and homophobic
harassment at the 49th
Precinct, where she
was the only female
detective, caused her to
retire after more than
18 years on the job.
[Sassafras
Lowrey]
..J
iii
She'sNoGagaTilaTequiladoesclearance
rack LadyGaga.Nobodycares
September 2010
I 13
LESBOFILE
Sapphic· Scandals
The Lady comes out, secret love affairs and a lesbian
sex tape. By Jocelyn Voo
TheLadyLikestheLadies
A LesbianontheCourt?
The small, sassy and underestimated rapper
LadySovereign
made waves when she officially
came out in May. In the past, Sovereign had
avoided making statements regarding her
sexuality, but in an interview with Diva
magazine, the 24-year-old finally tackled the
subject head-on.
"I was a bit worried about it, but now I don't
really give as---;• she said."You can't hide away
forever. It's just stupid, and now I've come out
I feel a lot more comfortable with myself:'
Sex and politics have always been intertwined: Recently, we've seen everything from
career-ending dalliances by politicians to
the political divide over gay marriage. Now,
enter ElenaKagan,Supreme Court nominee.
The blogosphere lit up with questions about
Kagan's sexuality, but the issue was scarcely
mentioned in the mainstream media ... that
is, until Kagan's alleged lesbianism was stated
as a fact by a blogger on CBSNews.com.
After that, the White House went full
steam ahead to quash the rumor, as are
Kagan's friends, who say the brouhaha is
"distracting" from her qualifications-and
we're apt to agree. Really,just because she has
short hair and wears almost no makeup? Just
because she hasn't introduced a significant
other to the public? What, are lesbians not
allowed on the court?
UkeAttractsUke
Sure, Lindsay Lohan's days of making headlines for partying all night (again) are over~
well for up to 90 days, plus rehab time
anyway-but there's still plenty to talk about
in the romance department. The latest news
is that she's chasing a new girl. Photographer
and reality show star Julia lndrani PalChaudhuri
has been spotted out on dates with
Lohan, and Indrani herself told the New York
Post,"We have been spending a lot of time
together. I have never had a relationship with
a woman before, but Lindsay is just somebody
who I find fascinating, gorgeous and extremely
smart, as well as super-hot:'
However-and
this may be one for the
record books-Lohan denied the affair: "No,
no, no ...In NO way am I dating her;' she told
Us Weekly.After watching Lohan's appearance
on Indrani's new reality show, we believe her.
14lcurve
Love,Love,Love
Courtney
Love,best known for marrying one
of the quintessential rockers of the '90s,
Kurt Cobain, may now be known for
hooking up with one of the quintessential models of the same
decade, KateMoss.
"It was just a thing
that happened in Milan''
in the '90s, Love told the
Irish magazine Hot Press.
"It happened and it was fun
and whatever. And she talks about it, and so
I hope she doesn't get mad that I outed her
about it:'
With the crazy, drug-addled history ofboth
Love and Moss, it's hard to know what's true.
Yeah, it couldhave happened. In fact, we like __
to imagine it did.
LesbianSexTapeScandal
Reality star KendraWilkinson
was first introduced to mainstream audiences on The Girls
Next Door, the butchest of Playboyfounder
Hugh Hefner's three girlfriends, a role she then
spun off into Kendra, her own reality show
on E! Kendra follows her life after He£ with
her husband, Hank Baskett, a wide receiver
for the Philadelphia Eagles. But things may
have gotten a little tooreal for Wilkinson now,
as she is the headliner on yet another reality w
~2
show-a sex tape.
The announcement of a sex tape isn't ~
particularly shocking, but this tape ~
has graphic, hardcore lesbian ~
sex with a woma~ named c3
Taryn. Considering that
Kendra spent her formative •
years in the Playboy ~
a:
Mansion having 00
bubble baths with ~
Hef' s two other
girlfriends, it makes us ~
wonder what else went on ~
()
behind closed doors. ■
8
_J
J
i
l
She Said
Women's resorts, bars,
cafes, bookstores & more,
across the US, Canada,
Europe & beyond.
Plus lesbian cruises &
tours. women's festivals.
pride celebrations,
LGBT film fests,
eco-adventures & morel
6LU
cc
~
~
Cu
z
ti:
::>
8
f
Call for a free catalog
4~~-~~~~
or visit us online at
(/)
::>
!!l.
a:
LU
~
~
~
a:
~a.
<i:
~
~
z
a:
0
J:
z
LU
~
z
5
ID
(!)
~
(.)
---,...-_..;...._.
_____________
_
Get Gurl Scout by Damron
on your iPhonel
Avoiding the Butch Blues
Can you be a modern femme without becoming
a Stepford Wife? By Lipstick and Dipstick
Dear Lipstick and Dipstick: Is it possible to love a butch woman and
not step on her toes by offering to take your own car to get the wiper
blades changed? I want to be a modern wife, not Mrs. Cleaver. Help!
- Frustrated Femme
Lipstick:Silly girl, butch women are pretty
progressive these days. Well, at least Dipstick
is. Although I'm the femme, when were on
the road, Dipstick let's me change the tire
when we have a flat, even if I'm in a cute skirt
and it's below freezing outside.
Dipstick:
Hold on there, Lipstick! I'm the one
who actually put the new doughnut on the
rental car when we blew out that tire during
our book tour.
Lipstick:
Yeah, after I got the old one off and
found the new· tire in the trunk.
Dipstick:
Well, someone had to call the bookstore and tell them we were going to be late.
Anyway, Ms. Cleaver, I sympathize with you.
I really do. I came out as a feminist before
I came out as lesbian or butch, and it still
puzzles me that there are butches out there
who want their women to stay home, cook,
clean, have babies and lay on their backs in
bed. Those tired sex roles are not what makes
you butch or femme. It's how you feel on the
inside. I love a femme woman who understands
basic house ma4itenance, the NCAA bracket
and how to take me for a ride now and then.
Lipstick:
Here, here, Dip. Who wants to just
stand by while the butch does all the heavy
lifting? Most of us keep our nails trimmed
for more than one reason. We like to not only
get on 'er, but also get 'er done. Stand your
ground, fellow femme, and grab those power
tools (or wiper blades) whenever you damn
well please. The butch will have to deal. It's
2010 and OK to be a modern femme.
DearLipstickandDipstick:My girlfriendandI
havebeentogether
for 1Omonthsandit's been
16
Icurve
verydifficult.Notbecauseof her,but because
of me. She's everythingI've ever wantedin
a womanand more.She makesme happyin
all aspectsof our relationship,
but sincethe
beginningit's been hard for me to do the
simplestthing,likebe honest.BeforeI metmy
girlfriend,
I usedto party,smokepotandhang
outwithfriendsall the time{I'm20 yearsold).
Whenwe met,I decidedto changemy life and
stoppartying,
dropall of mybadhabits.Orso I
thought.Butin a matterof 10 months,I've lost
her trust,security,loveand heart.No matter
how manyfightswe've had, however,she's
alwaysstayed.I lovemygirlfriendwithall my
heart.CanI fix this?Howcan I proveto her
thatI wantthisrelationship
as badlyas I want
her?-LyingFool
Dipstick:Obviously, your girlfriend sees
potential or she wouldn't have stayed
despite how hard you're making it for her. It's
either that, or she's extremely codependent.
You say you've stopped doping, but as any
addict will tell you, quitting is just part of the
change that needs to happen. You also have
to change your thinking, change your habits
and take control of your actions. I suggest you
check out a 12-step program and refer your
honey to an Al-Anon group. Start getting
involved with some positive activities you
will both enjoy. And conquer your lying the
same way you do your drug habit: One day
at a time.
Lipstick:I'll tell you how you can prove it:
Stop lying. Your lack of integrity is a gnarly
character flaw that needs fixing. Why your
girl is still around is beyond me; I'd have
kicked you to the curb months ago. Beyond
simply telling the truth, you desperately
need to examine what you're lying about,
Lipstick & Dipstick ADVICE
and why-as this will be incredibly telling.
Dipstick is right: Don't only get busy with
positive activities, also surround yourself
with positive people. The latter is just as
important to your well,being.
DearLipstickand Dipstick:I didn'tcomeout
to myselfuntilmysecondsemester
in college,
andI neverwanteda guy to touchme, ever.
My problemis my comingout was a slow,
slowprocess.
In otherwords,I amcurrentlya
virgin.I finallyreachedthestageI shouldhave
in my mid20s and I am approaching
my mid
30s.Anyadvice?-VirginTerritory
Lipstick:You put your right tit in, you put
your right tit out, you put your left tit in and
you shake it all about. You do the dykey pokey
and you turn her inside out. And that's what
it's all about.
Dipstick:
Lip, this isn't the hokey pokey.
Lipstick:I know. I wanted to loosen her up.
Dipstick:Well, she's probably not gonna be
loose the first time she has sex; she'll be ner,
vous as hell. She'll be shaking in her boots as
much as the vibrator shaking in her hand. We
were all nervous Nellies the first time. And
do you want to know a secret? Most of us are
nervous the first time with every new lover.
Old pro Dipstick included. It's kind of like
starting all over again. Your situation is com,
pounded for you, because it's not just sex, but
you're a virgin dater, too. I suggest you take it
slow and focus on meeting someone you can
partner know you're a total virgin. Just let her
know you've never been with a woman before.
In the meantime, study up on lesbian humpty
hump. The Whole Lesbian Sex Book by Felice
Newman is a great place to start, but also
check out the Best Lesbian Erotica series.
Lipstick:
Madonna once said that losing her
virginity was a career move. While I'm not
encouraging you to be that loose, you should
chill about it like Madonna. Dip makes some
good suggestions, but why not check out some
good girl,on,girl porn for some pointers, too?
Try the Crash Pad series by Shine Louise
Houston or Hard Love & How to Fuck in
High Heels from S.I_.R.Productions. ■
be comfortable with. Browse the personal ~
_
ads, attend lesbian mixers, go on a lesbian
Tune in to curvemag.com/lipstickanddip,
cruise, join a coming out group. I don't think
stick to learn how to "make your move."
there's any reason you need to let a potential
•• Or, write to tv@lipstickdipstick.com.
September 2010 j 17
ADVICERelationships
Love Across the Border
Don't forget to pack your FBI background check.
By Jamie Anderson
What does a lesbian bring on her 37th date?
Answer: An immigration visa. Well, you do
if you're me, and you fall for a handsome
Canadian. I know it's only Canada, where they
speak English and love American Idol,but it is
a different country. Here's my story. Treat it
as a cautionary tale or simply as inspiration to
find your own gorgeous Canadian.
At the Michigan Womyn's Music Festival
I see friends every year that I've met online
on the festival boards. One of them had
been sending posts from exotic places like
Sri Lanka. "Working for a humanitarian
organization has its perks;' she wrote. "One
of them is getting an apartment near a beach.
The downside is that sometimes it's right after
a tsunami:' I was delighted.
We were both in relationships so I didn't
see her in that way, although I thought
she was attractive and intelligent. Hey, I'm
not dead. Then I got dumped from a sevenyear relationship. She showed up at the next
festival, told me that her relationship had also
changed and gave me a full-on hug that had all
my parts screaming. Oh yeah!
Things went from there. That's all I'm going
to say because I'm not that kind of a writer.
Besides, I'd resort to euphemisms, and you'd
only laugh at me. After a long kiss goodbye, I
set off for North Carolina and she flew back
to Sri Lanka.
I thank the goddess of cheap phone rates
for the progression of our relationship. We
could have emailed, but I loved her sexy
accent, and she laughed at my jokes. We
didn't seem too different, except that she
grew up in a small town in Ontario, Canada
and I'm from suburban Phoenix.
I was thrilled when she moved back to
Canada-at
least we were on the same
continent-and
we could have stayed in
long-distance relationship, but when a cluster
of disasters happened at the same time around
the world it got us thinking. If there's a big one,
we wanted to be together. We decided to get
married so that I could move to Ottawa and
she could sponsor me as a family member.
Trips across the border are interesting. My
partner is annoyed by the long waits at U.S.
a
1s
Icurve
Customs, and she's never sure what to reply
when they ask why she's visiting. She's learned
that "To have hot sex with an American
woman'' is not the appropriate answer.
The Canadians are much kinder to me, but
U.S. officials have delayed me twice. The first
time I was asked why I'd been in Canada, I
said, "To visit my fianc~e:' The guy replied,
"Oh, he must've been happy:' I corrected
him: "She:' Beat one ... two ... "You've been
selected for a random check. Give us your
passport and keys, pull over and go inside:'
I did as requested and slunk into a building
crammed with people.
I jumped when my name was called. The
official grimly asked ifI knew why I was there.
I grinned and said, "Because I'm cute and you
want to give me a lot of money?" A voice in my
head was screaming, Crap, wrong answer! He
waited before responding, "Are you kidding?
I work for the U.S. government:' After some
additional back-and-forth, he decided I was
not going to overthrow the government and
returned my passport and keys.
I visited New York City for the weekend
then went back to Canada. A week later, I
returned to the States. When the U.S.
border guard asked what I'd been doing in
Canada, I again used the "f" word (fiancee)
and again I was selected for a "random" check.
I puiled over and sauntered into the dreaded
office again.
The downside to moving north is that winter
is almost as scary as the thought of Sarah Palin
becoming president. I can't see Russia from our
house but it'sjust as cold. We make jokes about
my partner keeping me warm, and since we're
both menopausal, that has multiple meanings.
Turns out, you can't just marry a Canadian
and move. She had to prove she could support
my newly-out-of-work ass. I had to get fingerprinted and an FBI background check. They
wanted to know every address and job I'd had
since I was 18 and wanted documentation to
back it up. I had to guarantee I'd love cheese on
french fries and say'eh''at least 50 times a day.
The immigration process was supposed to
take four to 10 months. It took less than three.
The U-Haul"is booked and the cats can prove
their shots are current. Yes, I can bring them
(without quarantine), but I can't bring my plants
or my eight-year-old Toyota. I am mourning the
loss of my irises but I am comforted by the fact
that it's too cold for them in Ontario anyway.
Just when we finally get a president with
an IQ higher than a carrot, I move north. Go
figure. That'll teach me to hug a handsome
Canadian, eh? ■
Money ADVICE
doing things with your money that are in
accordance to what's important to you?" And
what could be more romantic than
saving up together for an island getaway for two?
Put the Joy in Your Joint Account
How to stop fighting about money. By Heather Robinson
Anyone who has been in a relationship is no
stranger to the calm financial discussion that
quickly elevates into an all out battle royale. It's
this common problem that inspired Jacquette
Timmons to write Financial Intimacy in an
effort to help couples stop fighting about
money and get closer by becoming more
financially secure. The book combines real-life
gQries, exercises and practical habits to create
a road map to financial success. Timmons, a
national investment expert and money coach,
has been working in the financial industry
for 24 years and is the founder of New York's
Sterling Investment Management, making
the author a sage of fiscal wisdom. Here's her
advice for managing the money talk:
Start with yourself.It's best to have some
familiarity with your own financial house
before you start knocking on someone else's door. Timmons recommends
doing some self reflection before approaching
your partner, especially if you've fought about
money before. She emphasizes that financial
intimacy begins with you: "I don't think
you can effectively, and with compassion,
create it with someone else until you've
gone through the process of creating it with
yourself:' Stare by thinking about your own
history with money, good and bad habits,
and what you're hoping to achieve.
a:
~
Knowthat this is hardfor everyone.
If you
<(
~ have tried discussing finances with your
~ partner and felt like a pig on roller skates, take
Q comfort in knowing you're not alone. Most
people have no idea how to communicate
constructively about money. "It's not something that a majority of us learn how to
do within our own family units. We don't
really, in general, talk about money or have a
model for how to do that;' says Timmons. Not
judging your partner and taking responsibility
for your own issues with money are keys to
keeping things civil and productive.
Put it downon paper.Writing down what
you want is an amazingly powerful tool,
says Timmons. She often sees uncertainty
and fear of failure derailing this process. "Part
of the reason that people don't put it down
on paper is that they haven't figured out the
how [of becoming financially secure], and my
whole thing is it's not your responsibility at the
beginning to know the how. Writing down
what you want is the first seep in figuring out
how to get it;' she says.
Getit on.One of Timmons' biggest goals is
to change the perception that talking about
money isn't romantic. "It can be the most
loving, nurturing, romantic thing you can do:'
The key is co initiate calm, proactive discussions as opposed to the more common, much
louder reactive types. Timmons recommends
meeting on a regular basis, weekly or monthly,
and trying to create an environment that
fosters relaxation. "If you do participate in
libations, have a glass of wine on a Friday
night and just talk about what you need
to discuss: how much money was spent
that week, what your goals are, are you
Realizewhatyou'rereallyfightingabout.
Though couples often fight about money,
Timmons has learned that most disagreements are really about something else. "I
would say 99 percent of our goals have a
financial component to them. Because the
resources you have are not infinite, your
goals are fighting for those resources, even
if you're not thinking that that is the case:'
If you haven't articulated and discussed your
goals with your partner you may be setting
yourself up for trouble, warns Timmons.
A1so, she recommends keeping in mind that
there will always be three kinds of goals: your
goals, her goals and shared goals." Sometimes
you have to negotiate which of those sets
of goals will be a priority in terms of how
you allocate your resources:' And keep the
channels of communication flowing.
Learnto recognize
yourownblindspots.While
it's much more fun to comment on your
partner's shortcomings, learning to recognize
your own blind spots is more powerful. The
most common weak spot Timmons sees is
underestimating how much money you spend.
She has her clients practice the discipline of
tracking their spending for a month and they
are always surprised at the results. Most people
consistently underestimate how much money
they spend. Though tracking your everyday
spending is not particularly fun, it can give you
great insight in to where your money is really
going and why you keep ending up in the red. ■
30 SECONDS
TOCLOSE
THEDEAL
Another
bookthatfocuses
onwomen
andmoney
is Marketplace
reporter
Andrea
Gardner's
The30-Second
Seduction,
whichexplores
the
relationship
between
advertisers
and
femaleconsumers.
WhatGardner
finds
isthatwomenholdanimmense
amount
of
purchasing
powerandsuggests
advertisers
needtospeaktothedynamic
modern
woman.(sea/press.com)
[Frances
Yee]
September 2010
I 19
DYKE
DRAMA
U-Hauls Vs. Federal Rights
Why we don't want "seperate but equal." By Michele Fisher
"I could not afford eight ex-wives;' lamented
our serial monogamist friend over lunch the
other day. The rest of us nodded our heads
in agreement. She may hold the record for
cohabitation with the most ex-girlfriends,
but not by much.
"How many of those women would you
have married for real," I asked the octoex. She hesitated and finally answered,
"Maybe two:'
Most of us have played house with a
woman or two-or eight. I have moved in
with a woman I was dating for the following
reasons (or a combination the·reof): I was
broke. I wanted sex without having to leave
home. I felt sorry for her. My house burned
down. She wouldn't take no for an answer.
The apartment had a pool and a balcony. I
liked her dog.
The amount of time and thought I usually
devoted to deciding whether to move in with
a woman was about the same as I take to pick
an entree at dinner-and
I am not a picky
eater-and yes, I know how that sounds.
Gay marriage, big deal. I thought that
until not too long ago, in fact right up until
yesterday, when this column was due. I really
couldn't fathom what all the hubbub was
about. After all, we are already in committed
relationships. We even have commitment
ceremonies. We have children together, buy
homes, join political and social groups as
couples. I mean, what is marriage but a piece
of paper?
Spending the rest of your life with one
person is a big deal. And sleeping with one
person forever is a super-duper big deal. I
really didn't buy the idea that our promises
were any less valid than federally blessed
ones. But I now see that feeling "less than" is
taking its toll on our collective soul. A commitment ceremony is all we've got right now, but
let's face it-it ain't a real wedding. Like it
or not, we were raised with the same view of
marriage as our heterosexual counterparts.
As much as I have pooh-poohed the
concept of gay marriage and advocated that
20 Icurve
we leave God and the church out of the
thing and have civil unions, some part of me
realizes that many of us don't want "separate
but equal;' we want exactly the same thing
that everybody else has. We want to see a
lesbian Bridezilla. We long to witness an
angry lesbian cursing out an unsuspecting
salesclerk and ripping a lace veil in two with
her bare hands and then storming out of
the bridal shop, leaving her poor mother to
sort things out. We want our chance to behave
poorly and chalk it up to wedding stress.
The act of planning a wedding makes you
really consider if you have found your soul
mate and continue to question it every hour
until the thing is over.
You two will have to make a lot of decisions
and many of them will be about things you
just don't give a crap about, like buttercream
versus fondant for the icing on the wedding
cake. (Wait a minute-that's
a food-related
decision, so it is important.) Every day before
the wedding, there are more ridiculous but
expensive decisions to make, and any one of
a::
~w
a::
tr
w
z
ff
J:
~
them can cause a couple to implode. You are
tired and she is exhausted and you are both
broke but some putz keeps calling and asking
you about whether you want a swan or a
dolphin ice sculpture on the buffet table at
the reception.
A wedding is a production and everybody
wants a part in it. One of your friends has
insisted on doing the invitations, but your
fiancee has told you that she would sooner
have the Unabomber do the invitationsat least he can spell. Your girl's sister fancies
herself a songbird and has volunteered to
warble you down the aisle, but you think she
sounds more like a parrot on meth.
Disagreements, stress, financial ruin-all
are part of the wedding planning process. If
you two can make it through a wedding, then
you have a better than 50 percent chance of
survival as a couple, which is about average
for het marriages and certainly a lot higher
than our current success rates.
What marriage is really about is holding
you to your word. You cannot later say, "I
meant that I loved you, not that I was in love
with you" when you want to move on with
some tramp. There was a ceremony and food
and lots of witnesses and a videographer who
heard you say blah, blah, blah, "rill death do
us pare:'
So, when our marriages are legal-and the
very same as the unions of our heterosexual
counterparts-we
will no doubt find that
we have to be more honest with ourselves
and with each other. Right now, you can say,
"What the heck, lee's give it a whirl;' when
the woman you are dating suggests taking
things to the next level. But when the next
level is a legally binding lifetime commitment, you may have to stop and think for
a moment. This isn't going to end with an
uncomfortable chat, some tears and a few
months of sniping texts and hostile emails.
This is marriage and divorce.
Today, a lezzie divorce just means grabbing
a few things and moving into a new place. Oh
sure, there may be a few ugly moments when
you're deciding who actually gets to keep the
sex toys and the cat. But real divorce is something else completely. That old dyke tradition
of being best buddies with your ex will be
gone faster than your sobriety at the bachelorette parry. Lawyers, settlements, division of
property, child custody battles-and all of it
very expensive, even when it's not.
But divorce is a hazard that we are willing
to face. High rewards involve high risk, but
that doesn't scare me. I will now join the
fight for gay marriage in earnest. Bring on
the rabbi, the veils and the bad bridesmaid
dresses. No more almost for us, we demand
nationally recognized nuptials.
By the way, the wife thinks I am sincere
but quixotic about this whole gay marriage
thing. She just wants gay marriage so that
we'll have the same rights as everybody else.
She thinks it sucks that she and I have to
pay five grand more in federal taxes than her
married couples do, and she thinks it double
sucks that her straight counterparts will have
their husbands' Social Security money after
they perish, but she will have to make it on
her own meager allotment, which is a shame,
especially since I will be just as big a pain in
the ass as any old man. ■
erto
September 2010
I21
POLITICS
The Power of Teaching
Why literacy is independence. By Victoria A. Brownworth
September marks the official end of summer.
Yet for me and others who teach, September
marks not an end, but a beginning-new
classes, new students, new ideas. I began my
teaching career by accident, through activism.
It started with a program teaching illiterate
adults while I was in college as part of one of
my classes. After college, that work translated
into a stint in the AmeriCorps. I have beeri
teaching as an adjunct to my other work as a
journalist and writer ever since.
Teaching is probably the most underappreciated job on earth and yet it's difficult to
imagine a more important job. Good teachers
can turn poor students into great ones. Bad
teachers can turn even the best students away
from learning. The teachers who touch you
mark you forever and literally change your life.
One of my high school English teachers
changed mine-he made me see my great
love, books, in a whole new way. Dominic
Corsaro introduced me to the secrets of
language and the power behind it. I learned
about subtext and metaphor and the panoply
of enticements that are embedded in language.
22
Icurve
These things have application to every aspect
of our lives.Before, I was merely reading. After,
I was immersed-I
could not help but see
the layers that could be peeled back upon
language to reveal yet more. It was thrilling.
And empowering.
I still remember the day that it all became
clear to me. We were reading D.H. Lawrence's
Women in Love. The subtext of the homoerotic relationship between the two main
male characters was a revelation. That there
were secrets in language that one needed a
special key to uncover-was a moment that
is forever seared in my mind's eye. The door
opened to the secret garden of language. I
entered and never left.
As a teenaged lesbian, seeing a queer
relationship revealed in a high school English
class just one year after Stonewall meant that
there would be other such stories to discover.
It ~eant that there was a world of writing out
there for me to decode, now that I h;J been
given the tools with which to do so.
My own experience of learning made
teaching people to read a political act. I told
my students again and again that learning
to read was the most revolutionary thing
they could ever do. In my excitement and
political fervor, I would tell them that society
was predicated on maintaining an illiterate
underclass that could never succeed and
move ahead because language was the tool of
power and illiteracy was the way power was
kept away from them.
Yet despite my youthful n.uvete, it was
true. Women and girls are purposefully kept
illiterate in much of the developing world.
It was illegal to teach slaves to read here
in America. One of the main differences
between the developed world and the
developing world today is who can read and
who can't. It's obvious that literacy is the
greatest tool to independence.
Books had been my ticket out of an
abusive and poverty-stricken childhood. I
knew what language could do-that it could
open not just the door Mr. Corsaro had shown
me, but to being able to stand up for one's self
in life. For my ~tudents, it meant the difference
between being able to read the instructions on
their child's medicine or being able to read the
information on a bus or a street sign or to fill
out a job application.
I taught literacy for more than a decade.
I started out teaching adults in the literacy
program and later taught English as a Second
Language (ESL), which was tremendously
difficult and frustrating. I could only imagine
how difficult it must be for my students, who
were already fluent in the language of their
birth but were struggling to learn an entirely
new language.
After that, I taught inside prisons and
in halfway houses for ex-cons. More than
half of all men and women in prison are
functionally illiterate, which means they
cannot read above a fourth-grade level. In
today's society, not being able to read at an
eighth-grade level or more means you can
never get beyond minimum wage. Ever. It
also means you are more likely to end up
in prison.
My most difficult work as a teacher was
the years I spent teaching pregnant teenagers,
trapped by systemic disenfranchisement that
left them angry and surly. They didn't want
to be in class, but to qualify for governmental
assistance they had to a earn high school
equivalency. Half the class time was spent
i'.5
(/)
~-
~
~
:::E
~
~
learning the basics-English, math, historyand then "life-skills;' or as I started to think of
it: how to not spend your entire paycheck on a
sweater when your baby needs diapers.
Even as I was doing these other teaching
jobs, I was also teaching college.The disconnect
was immense. Imagine the difference between
teaching film or literature to college freshman
and sitting in a halfway house with men or
women who are trying desperately not to buy
drugs and teaching them how to read.
I could take my college freshmen to Mr.
Corsaro's secret garden of intellectual enticements. But those hollow-eyed guys in the
halfway house or my surly teens who regularly
sucker-punched me in the hallway? They
needed to be taught the basics they should
have learned years earlier and time was not
on their side. The time to make them love
books and idealize language was lost for them.
Whenever I was with them I wished I had an
IV full of knowledge that I could pump into
them to catch them up to where they could
actually love learning.
After doing it for more than 25 years, I can
say that there is no more political act than
teaching. Take those pregnant girls. I wanted so
much for them. I wanted them to have the Mr.
Corsaro moment I had when I was poor and
surly and angry about everything.
Learning about encoded language taught
me about my own life as a lesbian and as
a woman. A few years later I would meet
Mary Daly and 'ct.is-cover"the buried work of
women writers and artists and historians.
One good teacher gave me the tools to
find my own voice and to give voice to others.
He showed me the power of language. It
ultimately put me in front of the classroom
instead of in it. It opened the door to a world
where queers existed, not just in literature, but
in life. I could then open that door for others.
And so September remains the best month
of the year-the month of new students
and new minds to open. As the heat begins
to abate and the leaves begin to turn, I teach
and I learn, because each new classroom is a
new experience, a new dynamic, a new set of
questions that must be answered.
When we teach, we learn. When we learn,
we teach. If we could all give back just some
of what we have been taught, the world
would be so much less ignorant a place. And
all the doors would open-for everyone. ■
MEET MAYOR PARKER
for an economicboycottof Houston
becauseof yourelection?
YoumeanafterI gotdonelaughing?One
of the mostinterestingthingsthat has
happened
sincemyelectionis theabsolute
onslaught
_ofnationalandinternational
media.Weexpectedto get attention
but it wasmuchbeyondwhatwe had
anticipated.I havebeenan electedofficial
in Houstoncitywidefor 12years.The
factthat I'm a lesbianwasknownin the
campaignandwasdiscussedbut even
with an anti-gayattackat the endof the
campaignit wasn'ta hugeissue.The
responseof Houstonians
wason the order
of,"Weknowthat but canshegetthe
trashpickedup andthe potholesfilled?"
Whenpeoplelookbackonyourterm
of officewhatwouldyoulikethemto
Therearea lotof opinions
aboutthe
sayaboutIt?
significance
of yourelection.Whatdo
youthinkaboutIt?
ThatI dida greatjobin makingthecity
I amconflicted
ontheanswerto this.I really livable,andthatthecitygovernment
havespentmyadultlifeworkinghardto
functioned
at a veryhighlevel.[EdieStul~
advance
thegayandlesbiancommunity
...
andI havebeenawareof thefactthat I
ama rolemodelfor mycommunity.
I have
alwaysconducted
myselfwiththat in
mind.Ontheotherhand,I ranfor mayor
of HoustonbecauseI absolutely
wanted
thejob andbelievedthatI wasthe best
candidate
for mayorof Houston.
Thoseof
uswhocan,havethe responsibility
to live
ourlivesopenlyandhonestlyandthat's
whatmakesthebigadvances.
Whatis thebestpartof thejobsofar?
WhatI loveaboutlocalgovernment
is that
youcanaffectpeople'slivesverydirectly
ona dailybasis.Thebestlocalgovernment
is the oneyouneversee.Youonlynotice
localgovernment
whenwe screwsomethingup.
Hyoucouldwavea wandanddoone
thingforthecityof Houston
what
wouldyouchooseto do?
Trulyit wouldbeto focusonjobsandthe
economy.
I wouldjumpstartoureconomy
andtakethe unemployment
ratedown.We
havesomelong-terminfrastructure
needs.I
campaigned
onthefactthatI wouldfinally
puta comprehensive
floodanddrainage
programin placefor Houston,
notto be
completed
in mymaximum
sixyearsin
office,butto putit in place.
Whatwasyourreactionto Amarillo,
TexaspastorDavidGrlsham's
call
Houston,
TexasMayorAnniseParker
madeheadlinenewslastyearwhenshe
becamethefirstopenlygaymayorof a
U.S.city withovera millionresidents.
Parker,
53,wasbornin Houstonandhas
livedtheremostof herlife.Shegraduated
fromRiceUniversity
in 1978witha
triplemajorin psychology,
sociologyand
anthropology
andthenspent20 years
working
in the oil andgasindustry.A gay
activist
sincecollege,
shelostherfirst
two bidsfor a seaton CityCouncilbut
wonin 1997andwasreelected
twice.She
thenservedthreetermsasHoustonCity
Controller.
MayorParkerandherpartner
of 20 years,KathyHubbard,
livetogether
withtheirtwodaughters.
"Thoseof us who can,
havethe responsibility
to liveour livesopenly
and honestly."
September 2010
I23
SUPERMODELTURNED ACTOR TURNED REALITYTV
REGULAR,JENNY SHIMIZU IS SUDDENLYHOT AGAIN.
~ ~~
,,
[7ZA~UM/J-
PHOTOS BYJENNY RISH-ER--7
J
JENNY SHIMIZU has a crush on someone but she won't
clothes. It's more powerful than a page in a magazine:'
tell you who it is. Who can blame her, since much of the
Since she first arrived in L.A. in the 1980s, Shimizu has
speculation about the pioneering supermodel turned media
consistently been active in performance art, especially art
personality has been about her famous affairs.
pertaining to the queer subculture, a world she feels most
"Hopefully people ar~ tired of reading the same old story
at home in.
[about my sex life]. It's like if you won a race iri first grade and
"Being a member of Queer Nation changed my life,"
people kept bringing it up," says the 43-year old openly gay, Shimizu says, of the direct-action protest group. "It taught
Japanese American model, actor and media icon.
me at a very early age about what people can accomplish by
But if having sex with famous, gorgeous women was a , protesting peacefully and physically putting themselves out
race, Shimizu would be the winner. Among a number of there. Looking back, on the runway [my contribution] was
Hollywood's sexiest women, Shimizu has allegedly shared the
all about visibility for people who don't fit in. The impact was
beds of Ione Skye, Angelina Jolie and Madonna, gaining her
more important than just for me; it was important to reach
the reputation of an androgynous sexual demigod that even queer kids in subcultures or on the fringe," says Shimizu.
gay men seem to desire. Yet despite all of her experiences,
Suddenly hot again, as a series regular on Bravo's Make
Shimizu still says she still has a lot to learn about the ladies.
Me a Supermodel, a guest on numerous reality shows
"My mother says I never have problems getting women ...
including America's Next Top Model and Logo's Curl Girls,
but I'm completely not like that;' says Shimizu, who was a Shimizu never really went away.
college basketball star and garage mechanic as a young adult.
She's made a name for herself in multiple art forms,
'Tm very shy when it comes to women:'
transcending the fashion world to become one of the most
When it comes to her career though, Shimizu knows how
identifiable and inspiring queer faces in Hollywood. She
to say yes. "One day someone asked me to do modeling. I was starred in last year's smash lesbian hit film Itty Bitty Titty
terrified, didn't think I belonged and didn't think I was good
Committee- l 4 years after she starred opposite Angelina
looking," she admits."But I said yes and it took me places-it
Jolie in her first feature film, Foxfire. (Not long after Foxfire
took me everywhere. I have fear as a human being like every- wraped, Jolie came out to Girlfriends magazine about falling
body else but when a door of opportunity opens, I'm going
in love with Shimizu.) In 2007, Shimizu joined the cast of
to be the first to jump through it:'
the queer gothic beach TV series Dante's Cove (playing girlA the time, Shimizu was working as a car mechanic, friend to Michelle Wolff) and most recently starred in the
mt
apt to wear coveralls than couture, but after she was working class drama Bob's New Suit.
di-~vered straddling a motorcycle outside an L.A. club,
"When I was younger, I was getting to know mysel£ Now
and sporting an 8-inch tattoo of a woman with her legs that I'm older and more comfortable in my skin, it's fun to
wrapped around a wrench that reads "Strap-On," Shimizu
play different types of characters," says the actor
said "yes" to modeling.
While Shimizu has somewhat slipped away from the
Calvin and Kelly Klein were stunned when they met her. constant paparazzi attention she once got, she continues to
Shimizu's androgynous looks launched Klein's prominent
produce work she's connected to. She recently began writing
black and white ad campaign for CK One and set the standard
her autobiography, a few years ago she began collaborating
for androgynous models ever since. Since then, she has
with other artists to create her own clothing line and she is
worked with Prada,Jean Paul Gaultier and Versace (among
currently working with Richardson magazine and artist Molly
others), has graced dozens of magazine covers (including
Shiot on a new limited edition graphic tee collection under
Vogue, Glamour, Elle-even curve, 14 years ago), and
the guise of a line called MERCH.
was eventually named one of the 100 Most Powerful Asian
"My universe has died down a bit and I'm glad;' says
Americans by A magazine.
Shimizu, who once traveled the globe with Madonna and
Throughout her journey, Shimizu has been muse to such
was rolling in the kind of cash few models ever get to see. The
prominent photographers as Richard Avedon, Irving Penn,
change, the slow down, was a purposeful choice, she admits.
Bruce Weber and Catherine Opie, and photographs of her
Her new, less flashy life can be summed up by the change
have adorned the walls of the Guggenheim and the Los in the cars the former mechanic drives. "I used to own a
Angeles County Museum of Modern Art.
handcrafted 1985 Mercedes coupe from Germany. Now I'm
"I like the idea of being art," Shimizu says. Adding, "When
really getting into the modern station wagon. I like utility,
something gets shown in a museum, it transcends more
not pomp and circumstance. I'm not flashy. I like anything
than just the outside body of a person standing there with
that serves a purpose. That, to me, is really sexy:' Agreed. ■
September 2010 j 25
THE KIDSARE
[MORETHAN]
ALL RIGHT
Annette Bening and Lisa Cholodenko discuss the breakout film.
ONTHS
BEFORE its theatrical release,
there was already Oscar buzz building for Lisa
Cholodenko's new film, The Kids Are All Right.
While the glistening statue may not be certain,
what is certain is that the film is the largest,budget lesbian
movie ever made (unless you factor in films with marginal
lesbian themes like Mulholland Dr. and The Hours), and that
with Annette Bening and Julianne Moore-both
of whom
have recieved multiple Oscar nods for previous work-as the
leads, it boasts more star power than any lesbian film before.
Cholodenko is best known for directing the indie gems High
Art and Laurel Canyon and while Kids is a more mainstream
movie than her previous films, it still retains the intimate film
making qualities of her other work, a
calculated move by the auteur.
';\fter having made a few films that
were well received-but I think they were considered more
art house films- I wanted to make something personal but
commercial;' explains Cholodenko.
And she succeeded in her mission. The Kids Are All Right
is a beautiful film that reaches across the Indie/Hollywood
chasm and falls in the much beloved category of Little Miss
Sunshi~e and Juno.
The story centers around a family, made up of moms Nie
(Bening),Jules (Moore) and their two children Joni and Laser.
Joni, played brilliantly by up,and,comer Mia Wasikowska, the
star of Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland, turns 18, the age at
which she becomes eligible to contact the man who "fathered"
her through an open donor program.
Enter Mark Ruffalo's character, Paul, a motorcycle,riding,
organic food,cooking, L.A. hipster, and the excitement, both
positive and negative, that he adds to the family equation.
"We found this equilibrium where [Paul] had this dark side
and this arrested side ... that that he was magnetic and he was
charming," says Cholodenko, of the character.
The film explores the changing dynamics of adding an
unexpected family member to the mix. It is the ultimate
"what if" scenario for lesbians electing to use an open donor
program to start a family, and is the first film to answer the
question of what might happen when a kid who was once just
a blip on a sonogram meets the man who was once just a list
of desirable genetic traits in a pamphlet.
Ir was this investigation of the issues that attracted Bening
to the film. "I love that all of those questions are being tested,
not in some idealistic, earnest way, but in kind of an odd, gritty,
uncomfortable at times, funny way;' says Bening, who is filled
with praise for Cholodenko.
"Lisa's very smart about letting people figure out their way,
and kind of take ownership of the characters and the family,
and she doesn't get in the way of thar;' says Bening. She
thought about this for a long time. Thar's so important for me
to keep in mind-the years and years and years it took to find
these little moments, these little details:'
While the plot is compelling and moves at a good clip, it is
the character development that really sets this film apart. Nie
and Jules, despite being played by straight actors, are one of the
most authentic and believable lesbian couples in film history.
"I think they're both pretty evolved people;' says Cholodenko
of the actors. "Even though they are in straight relationships, I
think that wasn't a hard transition for them:'
Bening agrees. "We talked some and we rehearsed some,
but I guess we both felt sort of intuitively that we understood them. I felt that I understood their relationship, based
§' on what was written:' And really, who wouldn't want to play
...J
~ house with either Bening or Moore?
lBening seems tailor-made for her role as Nie, the seemingly
cc
::l uptight, yet vulnerable doctor who struggles the most with
<(
~ Paul's intrusion into the family. "I felt very comfortable with
~ Nic's skin, in her skin," says the actor.
~
Bening also delivers a brilliant comic performance. In one
I
~ scene, she awkwardly tries to explain to her son why she and
~ Jules prefer to watch gay male porn rather than lesbian. In
~ another, she lets her guard down and joyfully loses herself in
z
~ singingJoni Mitchell.
~
Cholodenko says she handpicked Bening for her capacity
to juggle vulnerability and comedy. "Just recalling scenes from
~ American Beauty, and her ability to be dramatic and kind of
g
§? straight and then hilarious, was something that's rare. You don't
;;- see that ability in actors a lor;' says the director.
w
Q While Bening came onto the project later in the game,
~ Moore was attached to it from the beginning. Cholodenko
\!i had met her years earlier at a dinner and Moore, who is known
~ for taking risks on indie films, dared the director to write her a
z
~ part."We had a funny conversation and Julianne said,'Oh, you
know, you should write something for me sometime: And she
~ was serious," says Cholodenko.
~w
The part of Jules is a great fit for Moore, who plays the
~ openhearted-if somewhat fumbling-character to perfection.
~ There's a real playfulness to her character and even when she
falters, you want to pick her up. "I love that she's looking, and
that she's not quite sure what she needs," says Bening, who
pauses and then adds, "I find that really endearing:'·
And that's a great word to describe the film as a whole.
This isn't a sexy film and even by Cholodenko's own words,
it's not a political film, bur it's an endearing, bittersweet
and authentic story that subtly and effectively erodes the
argument against same-sex parenting (and marriage for that
matter) by showing a family that's hard not to identify with.
And perhaps there's nothing more political than showing
how similar we all are. ■
"I think they're both pretty evolved people,"
says Cholodenko of the actors. "Even
though they are in straight relationships, I
think that wasn't a hard transition for them."
a
i
I
On set with the family
(top to bottom):
Dinner with the full
cast; the two moms,
Bening and Moore;
Cholodenko (middle)
with the stars
September 2010
I31
, why would you ever leave L
To help fight the heat, I like to spend my days in or near a pool.
Luxor is the first hotel to market to the gay community, and
they host the "Temptation Sundays" pool party, which caters
mostly to gay men, but still offers some nice eye candy for us
gals. During Las Vegas Pride, Luxor also collaborates with the
Women's Empowerment Network to host "Get Wet;' an
all-women pool party.
Kitty Dip at Tao Beach in the Venetian is a lesbian-focused
event that tends to be a little less crowded than the Luxor. If
you're looking for something even more relaxing, head over to
Mandalay Bay for sandy beaches, palm trees and a tranquil
tropical atmosphere. Dubbed "Mandalay Gay" by the locals,
it's not infrequent to see scantily clad girls engaged in heavy
petting in the private cabanas.
The pool parties are only foreplay, however, for the sexually
charged evening entertainment to come. Well worth their
ticket price, the Cirque du Soleil shows will blow your mind
and Zumanity is especially titillating. Located in the New
York, New York hotel, Zumanity features glorious naked
acrobats, gender bending eroticism and a remarkable girl-ongirl act, in a fish tank, that borders on pornography.
After the shows get you worked up, head out to one
of the many clubs that cater to the Sapphic scene. Booty
Bar, a monthly event at the Bootlegger Copa Room, is well
worth planning your travel around. However, the most
popular lesbian night is Saturday at Krave in the Planet
Hollywood hotel.
If you're looking for something a little more low-key, try
Down at Ghostbar, an indoor-outdoor lounge on top of the
Palms Hotel, or better yet Freezone, which hosts the longest
running drag show in Vegas and offers a Tuesday Ladies Night.
The Gold Lounge at the Aria Hotel also hosts an LGBT night
on Thursdays, but it tends to have more men than women.
When you're ready to crash, do so at the Wynn hotel, or
Wynn's "little sister;' Encore, which is my favorite luxury hotel
on the strip. With the most Forbes five-star restaurants in
Vegas, Wynn and Encore offer special pampering packages
designed for the gay traveler and a dedicated LGBT concierge
who will cater to your every decadent need.
If you're looking for something a bit closer to the action
(and a bit less expensive) try Harrah's casino or its neighboring
sister hotel Paris. Both are located in the middle of the strip
and offer reasonably priced rooms, but I prefer Paris' painted
ceilings and romantic atmosphere over Harrah's nice, yet less
exciting interior.
When hunger hits, scarf down some of the world-class
buffets offered all over town. From jiggling green goop to
lobster and champagne, there's a buffet for every palate and
Zumanityfeaturesglorious
naked acrobats,gender
bendingeroticismand a
remarkablegirl-on-girlact, in a fish
tank, that borderson pornography.
wallet. The Harrah's casino chain offers an all-access pass to
every one of its buffets for one low price, making it by far the
best dining plan on the strip.
Well worth the drive off the strip, the M Resort has the
best luxury buffet in town, featuring live-action cooking
demonstrations and a seafood feast to die for. Best of all, it's
a good $15 cheaper than its strip buffet counter-parts. While
you're out there, check out the M's Villagio Bar, located poolside and offering splendid views overlooking the strip.
After you are good and full, head to one of the many hotel
spas to wash away last night's sins and rejuvenate before you
do it all again. Like everything else at Wynn, the spa offers
decadent pampering including body treatments, airbrush
tanning and, my favorite, couples massages. Book early, or
buy a treatment with a hotel package, and the prices are
relatively affordable.
If you're looking to go green, Aria Hotel-a part of
CityCenter, the largest private sustainable development in
the world-boasts an eco-friendly spa offering organic skin
treatments and en suite services that don't even require leaving
your spectacular room.
Best of all, every hotel mentioned here, and its parent
company, boasts a 100 rating on the HRC Equality Index
and supports LGBT rights, which makes me happy to
support them in return. For more information on what
Las Vegas has to offer you for business and pleasure, go to
visitlasvegas.com. ■
September 2010
I33
NOT JUST FOR SPRINGBREAK
Why Cancun is an ideal lesbian destination. By Diane Anderson-Minshall
Yucatan
loveliness:
(top) the
thatched roof
umbrellas
along the
beach. Bottom
(from left):
underwater
scenescapes;
women at the
Olivia games;
a hottie that
makes us think
of From Here
to Eternity
34
I curve
Since our generally empty bank account required a rather
arduous flight itinerary-Portland,
Ore. to Phoenix to
Mexico City to Cancun-I planned for us to arrive at Club
Med Cancun Yucatan a day before the other Olivia travelers
swarmed in. That first night, as visitors slowly trickle in, there's
a sense that all of Club Med is ours.
Nestled between a lagoon and the Caribbean Sea, the resort
is built on a private peninsula so the haciendas we are staying in
are surrounded by gorgeous aquamarine and turquois water on
one side, and a no-swim jungle-like crocodile-friendly lagoon
on the other.
We wander the lands, encountering iguanas and lizards
sunning themselves, thatched roof beach umbrellas overlooking a quiet coast and pelican~ dive-bombing for fish,
just inches from our gorgeous beachfront that never seems
crowded. There are birds and i~anas and wildlife nearly every
where we turn (but thankfully, we saw no mosquitos).
This trip is my third with Olivia, the lesbian travel
company now celebrating its 20th anniversary of travel, but
it's my first at a resort. I have grown to love the cruises, but
something about being on a land-based resort for a solid week
underscores some of the difficulties of being on the boat. I
want to track down every single woman who previously told
me that they couldn't'clo" cruises (sea sick, claustrophobic, too
much walking, too restrictive) and shout from the ocean-view
balcony of my room, "Olivia Resorts rule!"
I'm a convert, once again. Everything about the cruises
that can be a little restrictive is solved in a make-your-ownfun absolutely all-inclusive resort vacation. There is snorkeling,
sailing, waterskiing, wakeboarding, beach soccer and volleyball, water polo, kayaking, aquafitness, yoga, dance classes,
bocce ball, ping pong and-wait for it-a flying trapeze and
circus school-all free, lessons included. I never thought I'd
go to Mexico, to the beach no less, to learn to walk a tightrope
and fly through the air on a trapeze, but damn if it doesn't
make sense once I'm there.
Booze was free, which meant I had a pifia colada in my
hands at all time, and since, unlike the boats, I didn't have to
worry about port calls at 7 a.m., I could sleep in. I drank my
weight in frozen cocktails that week.
Another joy of being on
resort time is the absolute
freedom to sleep when you want
(siestas were a must for us) and
eat when and where you want.
At the buffet style La Hacienda,
we pile on the fresh tropical fruit
and feast on Mexican specialties
every day (I'm still dreaming of
their breakfast chilaquiles weeks
later). At another of the resort's
~
~
~
i
w
~
~0
~
g
~
z
g
~
~LL
~
~
~
SPECIAL
ADVERTISING
PROMOTION
Best Lesbian
Resort Vacations
Around the Globe
Beloved
for itsserenewhitebeaches
andsoothing
surf,you'llsoonseewhythepristine,
secluded
Columbus
Isle,Bahamas
is oneof Olivia's
favoriteoases.
Tucked
alongtheshoresof
Bonefish
Bayontheislandof SanSalvador,
theresort'sbungalow-style
buildings
aresurrounded
bya privatewhitesandbeach.
Yourwell-appointed
roomwill havea soothing
oceanor peace(u1
tree-lined
gardenview.Remember,
yourfood,mostdrinks,mostactivities
andallyourOlivia
entertainment
areincluded,
including
showsfromfiveofthetopfemalecomicsintheU.S.:
MicheleBalan,Sandra
Valls,MargaGomez,
JulieGoldman
andDanaGoldberg.
Punta Cana Paradise Resort • May 7-14,2011
ClubMed'sPuntaCanaResortis nestledbetweenwhitesandybeaches
anda magnificent
coconut
grove.Theresortis situatedon75 acresontheeasterntip of Hispaniola
Island,between
the
Caribbean
SeaandtheAtlanticOcean.
Thisresortfeaturesa newfull-service
spa,oceanfront
suiteswithprivateinfinitipool,upgraded
rooms,restaurants
andbars.PuntaCanaParadise
is
all-inclusive-thatmeansall meals,beverages
(extrachargefor champagne
andpremiumliquors)
andmostsportingactivitiesareincluded.Weevencomegetyouat theairportandbringyouto the
club.Bestbet:Explore
thebeautifulbluewaters-go sailing,takea snorkeling
trip,try kayaking
or
simplyrelaxonthesun-drenched
beaches
alongwithlesbians
fromaroundtheglobe.
Palm Springs Spa Escape • October 13-17,2010
Relaxandrejuvenate
withthewomenof Oliviaat the#1 resortspaintheU.S.(according
to CondeNastTraveler).
Thiselegantescapeis trulya retreatforthemindandbody.The
private,spacious
andgracefully-appointed
Miramonte
boastsanaward-winning
spa;two
18-holechampionship
golfcourses,
threepoolsandjacuzzisandfresh,seasonal
Galifomia
cuisine.
Whether
yourpleasure
is tennis,golf,spatreatments,
hotair ballooning,
shopping
or
takinga tourof thestars'homes,ourPalmSpringsSpaEscape
is indeed"paradise
found."
JazzsingerSweetBabyJ'ai entertains
andyou'llbejoinedbya bevyof athletes,
including
golfsuperstar
RosieJones,Hallof FarnerDianaNyad,Olympic
trainerBonnieStollandtennis
proRosieCasals.
More Luxury Lesbian Vacations
:.,
~.
. .., ,,,, ...
r
_.
,~~
.
Alaska Cruise
Discover China
May I 5-22, 20 I I
June 24-July 5, 20 I I
Barcelona to
Rome Cruise
July 2-9, 2011
-
~
From European riverboat cruises, to Alaska
adventures, to African safaris and Mexican
Riviera escapes, Olivia has a trip for lesbians
of every age, as well as special programs for
solo travelers and women of color .
~
olivia
20 gears of lesbian travel• olivia.com
www.olivia.com
800-631-6277
restaurants, a more
formal Las Cazuelas,
we feast on lobster
tail with goat cheese
risotto that's so good
we literally write home
about it.
That first quiet night as were exploring the
resort by ourselves, we find hammocks off
in the distance, strung between palm trees. I
flop into one and immediately flip over. Is it
my size or lack of coordination? My co-pilot,
trying to assuage my obvious shame, comes
to me but does the same. Two more tries and
we're down in the sand atop each other, in the
middle of the night, below the hammocks,
laughing and holding each other. I hear wildlife noises in the distances and the whole
moment feels like that scene in From Here to
Eternity. Except, you know, queer.
The Olivia energy is alive and well at this
Club Med resort vacay. One day there's the
Olivia Olympics, where teams of lesbians do
beachside games to anoint winners (curve's
own Kathy Belge, aka Dipstick, is among the
jocks who score, while I watch from below
my beach umbrella, pifia colada in hand).
Every day there are pool games and water
aerobics that attracted dozens of women. The
water, instructors are tall, dark and handsome
Caribbean men, but to be sensitive to our
desire to have women teach us and add levity
to the seriously high-energy throbbing DJ
beats-style pool workouts, they dress in drag,
water balloons tucked beneath jog bras. The
lesbians in the pool love it. But I watch from
my lounge chair, pifia colada in hand.
Many Olivia women go on day excursions.
There are Mayan ruins ofTulum and underground rivers at Xcaret and dophins you can
swim with. Some rent cars at the resort and
drive down the Riviera, others take boats to
Cozumel or Isle Mujeres (the isle of women).
Each night, there is dancing at one of the
three bars. Special events abound. Theres even
a Dating Game (three butchlerettes and one
femme who we send on a date, chaperoned by
Dipstick). I'm not sure if they hit it off or not,
but I can tell you that the women in the room
next to us sure do. One day they have sex for
eight hours; I _knowthis because the women
seems to yelp like a puppy during the act. I
need an extra pifia colada that day just to get
through my siesta.
Cancun is gorgeous, though on hotel rowliterally a strip of hotels along a peninsula-I
can see that Club Med, on the southernmost
edge, offers something more. It combines
the feel of a high-end Euro resort with real
Mexico. At Las Cazuelas, a restaurant with
a giant thatched roo£ birds fly in and out of
the restaurant while we dine. In America, this
would lead to a lot of shooing and screaming
and probably a restaurant manager with a
giant broom trying not to violate the safety
codes. Here the wait staff seems unconcerned
by them. The waiters speak little English but
still cobble together enough to tell jokes, like,
"Remember, if you don't like dinner, you don't
have to pay for it;' which of course, is funny
because the resort is all-inclusive and you've
already paid for it. Those jokes get me going,
if only because I've had several more pifia
coladas before dinner.
The resort is environmentally-friendly,
with a focus on eco-toursim. Snorkeling is
literally 50 feet from my door, so I spend a
good chunk of my week underwater, circling
the coral reefs to look at ocean life that's so
vibrant and jeweled that even weeks later
I'm at a loss for how to describe it. Since I'm
sunburned on day one and my hair is a wreck
from the ocean salts, I rush to the Club Med
store to find more sunscreen and a bottle of
hair conditioner. Not grasping the exchange
rate, I end up paying $50 for those two items.
The boutiques at Club Med are not part of
the all-inclusive package.
But of course, I'm surrounded by gorgeous
frolicking lesbians, on the pristine Mayan
Riviera, with another pifia colada in my
gullet, so I forget all about that one ridiculous
purchase and just dive back into the blue.
green waters, where I want to stay forever. ■
flf
~
a:
g
!:!:,
[;j
~
d:i
g
u..
lA.p-c~ose-a""'d-per-so""'aL
Wt..th ;;Los Ar-cos"
CeLebr-ate
::2.0 t1ear-sof
firaveLwi.t'1oLi.vi.a.,
TH6 Lea~ey
i.~ Lesbi.a&&
<:::;r-&rb
r,olA.r-flip-flops
&rvt,~r,olA.r-sar-o""'g, &rvt,~
viop o""'bo&rr-~OlA.rMexic&r""' 'Ri.vier-&rCruise
(M&rr-cvi=:2.6-Apr-iL=:2.,~011) w[tn 1()00
Woll\.te""'!
FREE
PaymentPlan!
Bookyour lesbian
dream vacationtoday!
(BOO}631-6277 • olivia.com/curvetove
As low as
$207 pp/month
olivi
™
CST#1009281040
ALLABOARD
Adventure and romance on the rails. By Lauren Marie Fleming
"Grab your passport and follow me;' Laurel whispered in
my ear. She didn't need to be so quiet. We were probably
the only ones around who spoke English, but fear forced
us into secrecy.
The man across the train car-the one who had just pulled
a gun on us-asked where we were going. "To get food;' my
best friend replied in the calmest Russian she could.muster,
and he let us pass.
Less than an hour into our overnight trek across eastern
Ukraine, a young self-identified mobster from Odessa pointed
a pistol at us and, staring me in the eye, pulled the trigger.
He would later tell Ukrainian police that he was just flirting
with us, but when he cackled, cocked his gun again and put it
back in the holster, nothing could convince me to spend our
12-hour journey anywhere near this man.
The train attendants were reluctant at first to believe two
American girls-then thought we were "crying wolf" -but a
call to the Peace Corps headquarters where Laurel worked,
soon got us a police escort for the rest of our journey.
This is the only bad experience I've ever had on a train.
From my first 30-minute ride through San Diego, to the
trip I took last month through the Pacific Northwest, I have
found train travel to be gleefully exhilarating. Where others
see tracks with limited destinations, I see a journey with limitless freedoms.
I have dined on five-course meals traveling through wine
country, watched the snow-capped Alps while playing cards
38
Icurve
and chatted in five languages while passing under the English
Channel, all on trains.
My first girlfriend and I fell in love traveling through Italy
on trains. I still remember the moment at the Varenna Esino
station that I looked into her eyes and realized everything
between us was about to change. We held hands as we rode
through the mountain passes from Lake Como to Florence,
and that evening I made love to a woman for the first time.
Two years later, alone and lost, I boarded my third train of
the day, attempting to get to Hruba Skala, a famous castle on a
hill in the northern Czech Republic. My only companion was
SAVOR QUALITY
TIME
AND EXPERIENCE
A
TASTE
OFCHICAGO
With service to over 500 destinations nationwide, our welcoming onboard environment is just as
important as our cozy seats, beautiful views and great food. Enjoy the journey..
VISIT AMTRAK.COM
•y
----
Amtrak ts a registered service mark of the National Railroad PassengerCorporation.·
AIVlTRAK
9
Enjoy the journey.s•
SEEINGCANADABY RAIL
Oceanis likethe OrientExpress-a
super-luxury
train.TheQuebecOntarioCorridorofVIARailhas
fabulousservicebecauseit is also
a commuterrail lineandstops
frequentlywithinall the maincities
fromMontrealto Toronto.
All trainsin Canadahave
coachseats,whichareincredibly
comfortable.
Forlongtrips,sleeper
carsareavailable.
Thesecanbe
pricey,butif youwantto lie right
downor takea shower,this is the
wayto go.
Oh,Canada!
Theycall it the "world
Therearevariousdiscounts,
nextdoor,"andthat couldnotbe
however,
depending
onyour
moreaccurate.
Wishyoucouldgo
destination
and
the
length
of your
to France?
Vivele Quebec!
Yearning
trip.Seniorsalwaysget1Opercent
for London?
Torontois amazingly
off,asdopeoplebetween18and25
similar.Wantthat combination
of
(youhaveto requestthesediscounts,
countryandcity with a temperate
however).
Studentscangetmajor
climate?That'sVancouver.
Feel
discounts
of
upto 35 percent,
likewinterin thesummer?
Trythe
ontheirdestination.
hinterlands
of Saskatchewan.
Liketo depending
is the peak
ski mostof theyearbut can'tafford AprilthroughSeptember
seasonin Canada.
Off-season
rates
theAlps?Whistleris magnificent.
will belower.
NeverseenNiagaraFalls?It is far
A CanRailpasswill takeyoumost
granderonthe Canadian
side.The
in Canadain economy
RockyMountains
areamazingwhen everywhere
class.Thisprovides12 daysof
yougo rightthroughthem.Nova
comfortable
classtravelin a 3OScotiareallyis like Scotland,but
day
period.
Large
citiesalsohave
with betterweather.
commuterrail linesthat will let you
Canada
is alsooneof theworld's
travelwithincity limits.
safestcountries.
Halfthebottled
All rail travelrequiressome
waterin Americacomesfromthere,
registration.Don'texpectto just
soyouknowit's safeto drink,
buya ticket andhopa train. If you
andyouwon'tneeda travelvisa
go via Amtrak,for example,you
or vaccinations.
A countrywhere
everyone
speaksEnglish(Frenchand mustregisterup to five daysin
advance,dependingon whereyou
Englishin Quebec)
is alwayseasier
to travelthroughfor mostAmericans. aredepartingfrom.
Therearesomeminordownsides
Andthere'salsotheperkthat
to traintravel,astherearewith
Canadians
embraced
queersages
ago,soyoucouldalwaysgetmarried air travel.Trainsin Canadacanbe
delayeddueto freighttransport,
thereif themoodstrikesyou.
whichhasrail prioritythere.
Thereis nobetterwayto see
Butunlikebeingtrappedin an
Canada
thanbyrail.ThePolarBear
airport,waitingfor a train is rarely
Express
through"the
near-Arctic
unpleasant.
At yourdeparturepoint,
regionsof Canada
is amazing.
The
youcanusuallygetan estimateon
yourwaittime,andyoucansightsee
in the interim.
A traintrip to Canada
is,without
question,
a trulymemorable
vacation
in oneof the mostunderestimated
andoverlooked
countriesin the
world:beautiful,friendlyandsafe,
andthe perfecttrip for single,
lesbianscouplesor a groupof
friends.[Victoria
A.Brownworth]
40
Icu
ve
Sven, a pocket;size ceramic gnome, and I took pictures of him
and the red;and;white;striped Czech train cars in an attempt
to keep myself from crying in frustration. Yet no matter how
lost I got, once I was actually on the train I could always count
on the lulling clickity;clack of the wheels on the tracks to ease
my worries and calm me into a zenlike state of happiness.
And if the rocking of the train car doesn't work, I can read,
write or play cards, all things that would normally make me
extremely sick on any other form of wheeled transportation.
On this journey to Hrubi Skala, I chose to study my Czech,
so that by the time I finally made it to the castle on the hill,
I was able to order a well;deserved ice cream cone without
using a word of English.
A week later, I stood at that same confusing train station
eating kielbasa sausages, drinking the best beer ever and
listening to Cechomor, a band I was beginning to love. In a
stroke of brilliance, the band had bought an old red;and;white
Czech steam engine and taken it on tour, traveling from
station to station, playing on preset stages -to the crowds
that filled the train yards.
Part of the allure of trains is that ability to wander
through the cars, people;watch on your way to get food,
use the bathroom, or, if you're on the bullet train in Japan,
Where others see tracks with limited
destinations,I see a journeywith
limitlessfreedoms.
see just how fast you are going. Even though I had to walk
through toxic;cloud;filled smoking cars, my 15;year;old
self couldn't resist repeatedly checking on our speed. We
were going as fast as an airplane and from that moment on
I had no idea why anyone would ever fly when they could
take a train.
Back in die United States, I use Amtrak as much as posible
and know more fascinating details about my country because
of it. For example, did you know that there is both a Little
Dirty Creek and a Big Dirty Creek between Eugene and
Portland, Ore. r
I didn't, until I parked my car and took the train. ■
c3
~
~
~
f
hl
~
~
~
u.
w
~
:E
~
~
RIDINGTHE RAILSAGAIN
The unconventional reasons I love Amtrak. By Jennifer Parello
It's day three of my train trip from Chicago to San
Francisco and I've been jolted awake again by one of
the sudden, mysterious stops that have put us 12 hours
behind schedule.
I climb over the netting that is designed to keep riders
from falling out of their ·bunks and make my way to my
private bathroom. It's a small, stainless steel room (probably
not unlike the type used to hose down inmates in an insane
asylum). The showerhead is placed directly above the toilet.
I shudder at the sight, and wistfully transport myself to the
five-star hotel awaiting me at journey's end. Private sleeper
cars on Amtrak have perks: fresh linens and towels, bottled
water, free newspapers, an attendant, room service. But they
do not have the bathroom of my dreams.
My stomach growls. I made the mistake of taking a late
dinner seating, by which time the dining car had run out of
food. So I retreat to the bar car and grab a bag of pretzels
and a couple of beers.
I climb back into my bunk and giggle. I'm filthy, hungry
and trapped on a train in the middle of nowhere, with no
idea of when or if I'll ever arrive at my destination. And I
couldn't be happier.
I'm an impatient person, and I get anxious if I'm not on
time. I have never been camping and refuse to stay in anything less than a four-star hotel. Yet, in spite of all this, I also
love Amtrak.
, I travel a lot for work, and spend most of my week on
airplanes. Although you can usually count on planes to get
you where you're going quickly and on time, there is no dignity in air travel. You are treated little better than livestock. I'm
sure if the TSA would allow it, airline staff would happily use
cattle prods to keep you moving up the gangway. The airlines'
crowded conditions and general lack of civility have given
rise to a dehumanizing culture that prevents you from even
making eye contact with the person sharing your armrest.
So, whenever I can, I take Amtrak. Once you board the
train, time stands still. You are trapped for days with a weird
collection of fellow travelers, bound by sketchy food, erratic
scheduling, insouciant porters and public health threats from
close.proximity. Like strangers trapped on a deserted island,
you have no choice but to form alliances and figure out a way
to survive together.
In addition to women like mysel£ the population of my
current train trip can be broken down into four categories:
+
+
the Amish
recently released convicts
+
+
senior citizens
conservative Republicans
I tended to gravitate to the Amish and convicts.
I'm absolutely fascinated by the Amish, but, then again,
who isn't? The fact that they want nothing to do with me only
~ makes me love them more. On this trip, I've been smitten with
~ an Amish woman who is often huddled in the corner of the
>
~
S
observation car, hoarding snack food. She eats it compulsively,
stuffing chips into her mouth while staring blankly out the
window. When she finally runs out of snacks, I slowly push a
bag of Fritos across the table, in the same way you would try
to lure a suspicious squirrel with a chestnut. As soon as I turn
my head, she snatches the bag and scurries away.
The former prisoners are lots of fun and can be found in
the bar at all hours. A lot of trains, they tell me, aren't all that
different from prison-same food, same long, pointless hours,
same soulless martinets who often use their limited power to
make our lives miserable.
No one on this train knows me or
expects anything of me ... For this brief,
glorious respite, I am unreachable.
We are supposed to reach California sometime tomorrow.
This evening in the bar car, when I ask an engineer what time
we'll arrive, he says cheerfully, "Your guess is as good as mine.
What's your hurry, anywayt
And just as I am about to get on my high horse, and
lecture him on what an important person I am, I catch sight
of myself in the mirror behind the bar. My hair is greasy and
sticking out at odd angles. I am dressed in a ratty T-shirt and
holding a beer. Behind me, my new friend Rusty is shuffling
cards and waiting for me to return to our gin game.
No one on this train knows me or expects anything of
me. There is no cell phone- service, no Internet. For this brie£
glorious respite, I am unreachable. And where else in this world
can you make that claim? I ease into my club chair and pick up
my cards. "You're right;' I say.'Tm in no hurry at all:' ■
REHOBOTHBEACH,DELAWHERE?
Discovering this gay seaside town. By Fay Jacobs
Scenes from
Rehoboth:
beach walker,
gay dining
and directions
to gay Camp
Rehoboth
42
Icurve
Generations of U.S. legislators and their staffers have called
it "The Nation's Summer Capital" because it has long been
a seaside escape from sweltering D.C., but since the 1980s
Rehoboth Beach has been strengthening its claim to a new
title: "The Nation's Lesbian Getaway:'
More and more, the ladies are gathering, vacationing
and moving to Rehoboth. What's not to love:' Rehoboth
sits right along the Atlantic Coast and constitutes one
delightful square mile of beach cottages, expansive homes
and sparkling water. My spouse and I arrived by powerboat
from Washington, D.C., for a summer weekend in '94 and
never really left, morphing from visitors to property owners
to "locals" in a whirl.
In our tiny town, beach and boardwalk connect eateries
and gourmet restaurants (many gay,owned) including the
pioneering Back Porch, which sparked a gay incursion when it
opened back in 1974. The Blue Moon soon followed and the
transformation of Rehoboth into a contemporary and sophis,
ticated gay resort was off and running. Today, Rehoboth is a
treasured stop on the foodie circuit, offering everything from
gourmet cuisine to beach fries, and that includes vegetarian
sushi, all kinds of seafood and saltwater taffy.
Lodging includes high,rise hotels, Victorian and beach,
chic B&Bs (several are women,owned, like Delaware Inn
and The Homestead), a huge number of rental cottages and
condos. From upscale to funky, Rehoboth has it all. And
plenty of gay,gal realtors can help you find exactly what
you're looking for.
Exceptional gay,owned and gay,friendly shops lure visitors
from metro D.C., Philadelphia, Pittsburgh and beyond.
A recent multimillion,dollar revitalization of Rehoboth
Avenue has made sure that visitors get charming architecture
to go with their requisite hot dogs and funnel cakes.
S1,1mmermornings, before hitting the beach, my partner
and I sip java at Lori's Oy,Vey Cafe in the courtyard at
the LGBT Community Center along very gay Baltimore
Avenue. Then it's off to Gordon's Pond-our mostly women's
beach-where I hold a book but never actually finish a page
of text. There's way too much eye candy.
Sunbathers of all body types, ages and personalities
generously co,mingle on the beach here. Children of the
'gayby boom'' abound, and pooches are welcome in most
places. Flying Frisbees, volleyball and.conversations abound,
as restaurant emissaries traverse the sand with leaflets hawking
dances and celebrity DJs at our watering holes later that night.
Each spring, Rehoboth holds a Women's Fest, with nationally
known entertainers, a rockin' tea dance, classes, gol.£ happy
hours, girl parties and so much more.
Rehoboth's gay history actually began much earlier,
when Tallulah Bankhead and other starlets played at the
DuPont mansion here in town, and local women painters
became known both for their canvases and for their very
close friendships.
More and more, the ladies are
gathering, vacationing and moving to
Rehoboth. What's not to love?
When gays descended in the '80s, a backlash saw bumper
stickers screaming, "Keep Rehoboth a Family Town!" Now,
with lots of gay businesses helping Rehoboth through tough
economic times, the town is very happy to welcome all
kinds of families.
Women love to gather at happy hour on Friday nights (and
throughout the week, too) at Cloud 9 or Frogg Pond, and then
enjoy marvelous food and drink, trivia contests and karaoke at
women,owned Seafood Shack or Mixx.
There's lot:s of live entertainment, with popular enter,
tainers like Viki Dee, Mama's Black Sheep and One Love
ramping up the amps all over town. Throughout the
year, big,name entertainers like Kate Clinton, Suzanne
Westenhoefer, Judy Gold, Suede and Sweet Baby J'ai stop
by for sold,out concerts.
BESTPLACETO WRITEYOUR NOVEL
Summer Saturdays, I walk from one art opening to
another, many featuring women artists, often winding
up, Cosmo in hand, with hundreds of gays and lesbians
on the patio of The Blue Moon or Aqua Grill. Plans
are finalized for attending book signings, neighborhood
parties and fundraisers, or for dining out or doing some
laid-back grazing along the boardwalk.
The LGBT organization CAMP (Create A More
Positive) Rehoboth-born
to combat anti-gay attitudes
and now positively impacting the whole communitysponsors huge dance party fundraisers on the Fourth of
July and Labor Day.
Throughout the summer and all year long, CAMP
hosts women's events and keeps the community in
the loop with its award-winning magazine, Letters
from CAMP Rehoboth. Ladies 2000, the legendary
promoters from New Jersey, have fallen in love with
Rehoboth and produce huge women's dance parties
here as well. There's always something to do and fun and
interesting women to meet.
Despite four seasons of weather, Rehoboth is a
year-round beach town. The outdoor lifestyle of
summer cedes to fall's Independent Film Fest (with an
astonishing number of lesbian films) and Jazz Festival,
wild holiday shopping (no sales tax) and a New Year's
women's dinner dance at the Convention Center.
Did I mention the gorgeous scenery? Rehoboth is
a photographer's paradise, with amazing water and
boardwalk views and wildlife for anyone who enjoys the
digital camera quest.
Our hometown crowd is a seamless blend of
Delaware locals and a burgeoning number of LGBT
retirees (or wannabe retirees like myself), who decide
to spend the last of their working years dialing back
on their careers and doing something rewarding in
a place they love. Bye-bye corporate drag and nasty
commutes-hello
Pride and joy in "Gayberry R.F.D:'
Our weekend visitors number hundreds of young
women, many couples but just as many singles, in
search of love. We've been known to host frantic
and very successful lesbian speed-dating sessions,
Olympic-worthy women's beach volleyball and fourwheel-drive spins along the shore for beach fishing
(li<;en~esrequired but they're easy to obtain).
For gals with a passion for boating there are sport
boats, pontoon crafts and fast-and-furious wave runners
for rent, along with charter fishing if you're a really
serious fisher-woman.
From pinball arcades and dolphin watching
to dazzling cuisine and a colossal gay sensibility,
Rehoboth might be an unexpected place to visit, but
spend some quality time here and you'll never say
"Delawherer'' again. ■
FayJacobs is the author of As I Lay Frying:A Rehoboth
BeachMemoir.
Thedriveto ShaktiCoveCottages-a
littlesliceof lesbian-owned
paradise
onthe LongBeachPeninsula
of the
Washington
coast-is onlya few hours
fromPortland,
Ore.
OnthewayupI dothethingsI oftendo
in thecar:holda phonemeetingwith my
publisher,
illegallytexttheofficewhile
driving,checkmyTwitterfeedat stop
signsandrepeatedly
listento myfavorite
roadtrip song,MelissaEtheridge's
"You
CanSleepWhileI Drive."
I pulloversixtimesto writedown
storyideas,twiceto snapphotosat
sceniclookoutsandonceto checkout
the localCountryStore.Sufficeit to say,
I amnotin relaxation
mode.Butall that
changesassoonas I getto mycabin.
ShaktiCoveis a seriesof 1Olittle
one-room'5Osstylecoastalcottages
that aren'tprimitive(theyhave1Vs,
stovesandnice,butsmallbathrooms)
butareby no meansthe luxuryresort
cabanasyoufind otherplaces.But,
again,this is theWashington
coastwherecrabfests,clamdiggingand
dogsplayingFrisbeeonthe beachare
morecommonthanhautecuisineand
typicaltouristactivities.Eachcottage
hasits owntheme:I'm in Goddess,
whichis adornedwith womenfromthe
ageswhoembodythat ethos.There
arehandmade
soapsin the bathrooms,
old guestjournalsandvideosyoucan
checkoutat nocost.
Thecottageshavebeenheredecades,
andsomefolksreturnhereyearafter
year.Theywritein journalskeptin the
cottagesandthestoriesarefilledwith
lesbianloveandlossandeverything
in between.Oneentry,writtenonthe
daytheWorldTradeCentercamedown,
bringschills:"Nothingcouldtakeaway
thepainandgriefof whathappened
today... butbeinghereat Shaktihelped
lessenourangerandbringaboutcalm
andconnectedness
andasyearspass
andpeopleaskwherewereyouwhen
terrorstruck,we'll countourblessings
andsaywewereat the mostlovely
placeonearth."
Onewomanfoundclosurein the
Angelcottageafterherpartnerof 18
yearsdied-a hotrodderwhocame
upannuallyfor a localcarshow.His
motherbroughthisashesto placebelow
thetreeoverlooking
a sloughonthe
propertyandin the oceanthat'sa five-
minutewalkacrossthe dunes.
It's nearthis peacefulplacewhereI
sinkquicklyintoa peacefulmeditative
state.ThebookI haven'tbeenableto
startbecauseof six monthsof writer's
blockcomesflowingoutof mewithinan
hourof myarrival.
Theotherresidentshere-a lesbian
couplein their 7Os,two lesbiansin their
3Os,a straightcouplewith two dogs,
a motherandherkids-are whisper
quietandthe placeis so safethat
the cottagesaren'tevenlocked.It's a
lesbian-ownedretreatprimarilyfor
lesbians,but welcomingto everyone
who respectsit. Dogsaren't just
allowed,theyarepreferred.All Shakti
furnishingsarecoveredin dog-friendly
throws,anddogshavetheir owntowels
in the laundryroom.
I canseewhyonelesbiancouple
saysthey'vebeencomingto Shakti
oncea monthsincetheygottogether13
yearsago:it's seemsthe easiestplace
to shutout everythingbut eachother.
Forme,I spendmy dayswritingand
returningto thosewetlands,nevereven
venturingthat briefwalkto the coast,
becauseI'm contentandcreativein the
Shaktibubble,a peacefulatmosphere
that I neverexperience
at home.
Later,as I eatandwrite amonga
groveof trees,I watchasthe womanin
the cottagenextto megivesherkite to
a little boywhois alsovisitingShakti,a
strangerwhois thrilledto playwith it all
dayonthe beach.Thatnighthe comes
backwithoutit andI overhearhim ask
herhowmuchit costto replace.
"Whensomeonegivesyousomething
youdon'taskaboutthe cost,"shetells
him."Youconsiderthat a gift fromthe
universe,a signthatthat gift is meantto
bewith younow,to enrichyourlife.Just
cherishit."
It is a perfect,pricelesssentiment
for time spentat ShaktiCove,as well.
[DianeAnderson-Minshall]
~
SEEINGL.A.THEGAY.WAY
A bus trip through the city's queer history. By Mary McGrath
A gay bus tour of Los Angeles? Surely
you jest. I hear about many L.A. bus
tours, but they're usually your straight
and standard tourist fare-Dead Actors
Tours, Shopping and Sushi, See the Getty
and Go Fishing! You name it. There's a
tour for everyone ... except us.
So when I got wind of a tour of gay L.A.,
I was immediately excited. Will we board
a big rainbow van and throw beads from
the windows? Will drag queens trip the
light fantastic channeling Judy Garland?
Perhaps a k.d. lang look~alike will be our
guide. Who cares-sign me up!
Out & About Tours is "Hollywood's
First and Only Gay Bus Tour" and it's a blast. Imagine
unveiling the hidden gems of Hollywood's "glorious and
sometimes painful past, through this entertaining look at
LGBT history:'
We showed our tickets, and as we boarded the bus from our
West Hollywood location, we heard a friendly voice.
"Do you want to be a top or a bottom?" our host asked,
inquiring about our preference to sit on the top deck or
below. We both opted for the better view, climbing the stairs
to take our seats. I looked around at the glee among all the
passengers. All denominations were present-old,
young,
gay,straight and even the sexually undecided were on hand to
enjoy the ride. The camaraderie was infectious as the engine
roared and we headed east.
Touring West Hollywood, downtown L.A., Silver Lake,
Echo Park and the Sunset Strip, we covered a lot of LGBT
history, beginning with the city's pre~Spanish~settlement
era, continuing through the Golden age of Hollywood, the
ROUTE
gay rights movement of the '60s and '70s and finally focusing
on what's been going on today. Much was revealed about
closeted movie stars and the places they'd frequent, including
those underground bars where whistles would blow when the
cops arrived. We learned about the sometimes painful blows
endured by many clamoring for basic human rights. And of
course, there was that sprinkling of celebrity gossip-Did
you know that Rock Hudson's career flourished when Tab
Hunter's private life was exposed?
Founded by Jim Anzide, who started as an actor and was
a founding member of the Circle X Theater Company, Out
& About Tours (outandabouttours.com) began in 2009, born
of Anzide's frustration with the outcome of Prop. 8. And it's
been on a roll ever since.
The tour is lively-calling for a lot of
audience participationas the hardships
and triumphs of gay life over the
decades are revealed.
The tour is lively-calling for a lot of audience participation
as the hardships and triumphs of gay life over the decades are
revealed. Riders wear nametags, becoming Harvey Milk, Greta
Garbo, Billie Jean King and others who have had an impact
on gay history. LGBT villains are booed, while our heroes are
cheered. I was Harvey Milk and enjoyed my applause.
Halfway through the tour, we took a break in Silver
Lake at one of the oldest gay bars in the area, appropriately
called The Other Side. Men and women both crooned and
swooned at the piano bar as memories were shared and new
friendships blossomed. ■
MEGABUS BOLTBUS
FARE
FARE
.TAKETHE BUS
·············································
...........................
···············································
..............................
.
.~.~.~~~.~..~~ ..~.~.~..Y.~r~.....................
.............
....
,1.,......................
...
,.~~
.........
.. Forgetyourbusofyesteryear, buck),youcanaffordtosee
loveany
.~~.i!.~.~.~!P.~.!~
..~~ ..~~~.X~r~.................
$.1..~
........................
...~~.~..........
. withitscrampedcabinsand yourlong-distance
scratchy
seats.Today's
busses timeyouwant.
*FareboughtIn July,basedon 14-dayadvancepurchase.
arecomfy,
ecoandmodem-all
Along
thesame[bus]lines,
whileretaining
anultraBOLTBUS
features
perkssuch
budget
price.Nowonder
asfreeWi-Fi,extralegroom
somanylesbians
are
andreserved
seating,
soyou
choosing
thebus.Here
cansitnexttoyourhoney.
aretwogreatcompanies: Itsfaresalsorunaslowas
MEGABUS
covers
the
$1.BoltBus
serves
theEast
Northeast
region
and
Coast,
running
tripsbetween
boasts
freeWi-Fiand
NewYork,Baltimore
and
outlets.
Withspecial
Washington
(andit'sa whole
pricesaslowas$1
lotnicerthantheChinatown
(that'sright,I saida
bus).[Eleni
Stephanides]
44
I curve
TREKKINGJORDANAND ISRAEL
Three days of female bonding in the desert. By Stephanie L. Freid
We had trekked Jordan's Jabel Bakker cliffs for six hours. The
luxury vacation, but the valley was beautiful, and it was
steep incline had been rough, but we were now on the way unlike anywhere I'd traveled before.
down. Robin, a 54-year-old Canadian psychotherapist, was a
Spotting the others circled around a blazing fire in the center
first-time hiker and self-proclaimed "recovering couch potato:'
camp, I hastily joined. "Lucky weve got wine;' one of my new
She had endured six miles of rough, desert terrain but finally friends enthused. Jordan's Islamic conservatism make beer
snapped on the slippery descent, unwilling to go further.
and wine inaccessible most places. And, no surprise, displays
"You won't fall down the cliff. Give me your hand;' coaxed of affection between same-sex partners are also taboo.
Judy Mizrachi, the slight, blonde Ohio proprietor of Women
"Good evening!" Mizrachi greeted me boisterously, passing
Walkers. The rest of us, women from all over the globe, cheered
the Shiraz. "Welcome to Raunchville cocktail hour. Let it
our fellow hiker on. I marveled at the outpouring from the
loose. Feel free to talk about your divorce, boob job, financial
trouble, in-law trouble-anything!"
nine women who, just hours earlier, had been strangers. This
was why I had joined Women Walkers: challenge, adventure,
As the wine worked its magic, secrets began escaping. One
fun and female camaraderie.
woman alluded to "wild sexual experimentation;' another
We slowly made our way out of the canyon that had once • spoke of her divorce from her husband of 21 years and
served trade merchants crossing Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Jordan
still others offered advice on single parenting. We were
and Israel. Exiting after dark, we piled into the back of a waiting in Girlsville, all right, and it was bliss. This was summer
pickup truck and headed to the "Rum Oasis Desert Palm
camp fun in the Mid East winter.
Camp:' The camp is named for the Wadi Rum, a Nabataean
When the mess tent dinner bell rang, we feasted on a
stomping ground of yore and Jordan's largest valley,which sits delicious Middle Eastern buffet of roasted lamb, baked garlic
atop shifting tectonic plates.
chicken, cucumber and tomato salad, rice, hummus, tehini,
At camp we offloaded our gear inside our roomy canvas pita bread and baklava with hot tea.
tents and I ventured to the generator-lit, concrete bathroom.
Between bites, I asked Mizrachi about her all-female
The porcelain sinks were modem but the toilet was nothing
trekking business, which she started in her 50s. "It was a lifemore than a hole-in-the-ground with a rubber hose-a
long dream. I love hiking here. With girls-only, you don't have
simple bidet. Frigid temperatures and no hot water cancelled to worry about make-up and you can be compassionate and
out the possibility of an evening shower. It was not exactly a let your emotions show;' said Mizrachi.
46
Icurve
:r
u
~
ffi
::E
i
@
a:
LL
.J
LU
~::c
a.
~
A woman from Berlin concurred. "On mixed excursions the chemistry changes. There's less bonding, and
domination and competition sap the calm energy:'
After dinner, we retired to our tents, seeking warmth
beneath sleeping bags covered with wool blankets. Too
cold to change, I reluctantly resigned myself to wearing
the leggings, fleece and wool socks I'd hiked in all day.
I was asleep within minutes.
DAY2: CAMELS,4X4SAND A TURKISHBATH
"Wakey, wakey!" Mizrachi beckoned at 7:30 a.m.
Stiff quad and calf muscles complaining, I pulled
on hiking boots and exited my tent for a first view
of our environment. Towering canyons glowed pale
rouge and sienna in the morning sun and endless
sand carpets disappeared into vast valleys of silence.
It was magnificent.
Two men were setting up an outdoor breakfast buffet
opposite the mess tent, while others, now rousing,
grabbed cameras to capture the morning view.
After quickly changing and brushing my teeth, I
joined the gal squad at a plastic table. We dined on
boiled eggs, pita bread with grape jelly, sliced cucumber
salad, Velveeta style cheese, black olives, halva, sweet
tea, instant coffee and more intimate talk: Divorce,
therapy, struggles and advice were the topics du jour.
Afterwards, we reconvened at the camel-loading area.
For the next three hours, our guides led us in caravan
formation on camelback through The Lawrence of
Arabia Valley, named for the famous movie filmed
there. We viewed vast canyons, stretches of desert and
ancient etchings on the stone walls.
This was "extreme desert;' our 28-year-old guide
Benny explained. Scant rain and drastic temperature
variables-high 90s during the day and low 30s at
night-were standard. "The desert is a testing ground;'
the tall, soft-spoken blonde explained. "You come up
against yoursel£ layers get stripped away and you
discover quiet parts you didn't know existed:'
Back at camp by midday, we piled into 4x4s and raced
across desert sand dunes, screaming with exhilaration.
We exited the desert in late afternoon a11d traveled
by highway to Petra's Amra Palace Hotel, our lodging for the night. In sharp contrast to the desert, the
resple.ndent marble staircase entrance, cascading
Bougainvillea and spotless rooms with crisp white
linens and feather pillows were refreshing. Desert?
OK. Luxury? Absolutely.
After check-in, we met at the hotel's Turkish bath
for an authentic Mid East experience: communal steam
room followed by almond soap body scrub and full
body massage.
At dinner we discussed the heavenly massage
experience. "Being bathed was like infant regression;'
one woman enthused. "I nearly fell asleep;' another
LEZ-FRIENDLY
TOURS
Aroundtheworld,tourcompanies
are
offeringwomen-only
andlesbian-specific
traveltours.Here'sanoverviewof some LESBIAN-FRIENDLY
TOURS
of thebest:
WhileWomenTraveling
Together
is not
a lesbiantravelcompany,
it organizes
an impressive
collectionof womenGAY-RUN
ORLESBIAN-ONLY
TOURS
Stronglyqueer-positive
WildWomen
onlytours,emphasizing
adventure
and
culturalimmersion.
Its 2011offerings
Expeditions,
whichdirectorBethMairs
includea VirginIslandstrip,Thailand,
started20yearsago,runsmorethan
Hawaiiandanexcursion
to Jordanand
25 all-womenoutdooradventure
trips
throughout
Canada
everyyear.WWEoffers Israel.(women-traveling.com)
a fewlesbianandbisexual
trips,andon
anygiventourabouthalftheparticipants All of theenticinglynamedAdventurous
andthevastmajorityof thestaffarequeer Wench'stoursarefor womenonlyactive,outdoorsy
women-thoughnone
women.
(wildwomenexp.com,
is specifically
designated
for lesbians.
"Ourtoursareopento all women,"writes
Bushwise
Women,
founded13years
founderDeanna
Keahey,
whoespouse$
ago,offerstripsto Europe,
Canada
and
thefollowingqueer-friendly
philosophy:
NewZealand.
OwnerYvonne
Jenkins
"Travelteachestolerance."
Theirtrips
estimates
,thatabout70 percentof her
participants
arequeerwomen.Bushwise includesailingthe BritishVirginIslands,
exploring
wildlifein CostaRicaandhiking
offerslesbian-only
trips-the most
inArizona.
(adventurouswench.com)
popularis to the motherland,
Lesbos,
Greece.
(bushwise.co.nz)
TheFemmeFITallhomepage
showsa
slimyoungwomanwearingpinkboxing
DriftwoodDreamers
offersguided
glovesanda grimexpression.
President
toursaroundNewZealand.
OwnerLyn
KateLichtersaysthat hertoursoffer"a
Riesterer
says,"MypartnerandI who
healthytwist onthe traditionalgirlfriend
runthis business
arelesbian,andif at
getaway."
Althoughthe organization
all possiblewe uselesbian-run
B&B
hasnotyet runanytoursexclusively
for
accommodation
onourtoursaswell."
Approximately
75 percentof Driftwood's lesbiansor bisexualwomen,theywould
loveto startone.(femmefita/1.com)
clientsarelesbian,andtheyoffer
lesbian-only
smallgrouptours.
Lucky,DickyandNickyChhetriare
(driftwooddreamers.com)
threeNepalesesisterswho have
Alsoin NewZealand,
PotikiAdventures openedup the worldfor womenby
co-owneranddirectorBiancaRansonis beingthe first femaletrekking
a Maorilesbianwhorunswomen-only guidesin their country.Since1994,
toursfroman indigenous
perspective. 3 SistersAdventurehasworkedtoward
empowering
womenin Nepal.Lucky
"I specializein adventure-kayaking,
estimatesthat 1Oto15percentof the
snorkeling,
abseilingandtrekking,as
participantsarelesbians,but 100
well as Maoriart andculture,"says
percentof the womenwho participate
Ranson.
Halfherstaffarelesbians,
"will be supportingNepalese
women...
andtheyprovidelesbiantours,too.
to beeconomically
independent
andself(potikiadventures.co.nz)
supporting."
(3sistersadventure.com)
In 201O,Canadian-based
gaytravel
companyOutAdventures
is offeringtwo Thoughnot primarilydesignedfor
toursfor womenonly,whichcofounder lesbians,GutsyWomenofferstours
Robert
Sharpexplains
are"sortof" lesbian- aroundthe world,includingNorth
America,LatinAmerica,Africa,Europe,
only."Weofferwomen-only
tours,[but]
Asiaandthe SouthPacific.OwnerApril
evenon ourregular[mixed]tripswe
Merendasays,"Weattractwomen
don'tidentifyas beinggay-only.We
from all overthe world,and65 percent
standbythe policythat we welcome
of our clienteleare repeatcustomers."
gaymen,lesbians,
theirfriendsand
(gutsywomen.ne~
[GillianKendall]
family."(out-adventures.com)
Trekkingcontinuedon page 63
Want more all-women
lesbian-owned
adventure travel? Read about
Manah Wilderness Expeditions at curvemag.com
HOT,GAY-FRIENDLY
HOTELSOF THE WEST
_ SurftidesInn,LincolnCity,Ore.
Ocean-front
roomswith private
balconies?
Check.Indoorpooland
sauna?Check.Ober-gay
friendly
ambiance?
Check.Locatedin one
of the Northwest's
mostLGBTfriendlyc·oastal
towns,Surftides
Inn(above)
containsall the
ingredients
for a romanticgetaway
(orevena familyaffair).This75yearoldfamilyoperatedboutique
hotelcombines
hipandswanky
detailingandoldschoolcoastal
charm.Sure,thesurfbeckons,
but
you'llalsofindvisitorscanoodling
arounda gorgeous
communal
fire
pit (thesiteof a giantclambake
duringtheirPride),findingsolace
in theoutdoorgardenandculling
throughbooksin the library.The
recentlyrenovated
Surftides'
restaurant
includes
anopencopper
fireplaceandbarthatservesup
nauticallynamedcocktailsand
comfortfoodfromthesea(like
theirto-die-forDungeness
crab
omelet).Clean,picturesque,
with
a mildmaritimeclimate,Surftides
Innis alsothe spotmanylesbian
coupleschooseto renewtheir
vows.Witha city as romantic
as LincolnCity-where local
glassblowers
put 2,000rare
hand-blownfloatsto seaeach
year,so visitingbeachgoers
can
findthem-who canblamethem?
(surftideslincolncity.com)
Hotel43,
Boise,Idaho
Nowthatthe
city hasalmost
halfa million
residents(many
whoworkin the
hi-techindustry),Boisefinallyhas
an upscaleboutiquehotelbefitting
a majortraveldestination.
And
whata doozy:this post-modern,
mahogany
marveloffersup live
jazzin the lounge,12-footceilings
andhugeflatscreen
lVs elsewhere.It'sjust blocksfromthe
charmingdowntown,
the Basque
region,a 16-milegreenbeltand
thecountry'sonlyriverthatruns
rightthroughdowntown.More
importantly,it's rightsmackin the
city'sculturallyburgeoning
artsy
hipsterhood,the LinenDistrict.
Everypartof Hotel43 is wonderful
andbefittinga NewYorkor San
Francisco
boutiquehotel.Around
eachcorneryoucanimagine
runningintoa novelistor cowgirl
or maybeevenan Idahonativelike
• DemiMoore.(hote/43.com)
HotelMonaco,
Seattle,
Wash.
Smackdabin the middleof the
EmeraldCity'sdowntown,
and
nearthefamousPikePlace
Market,PioneerSquareandthe
famedSeattlePublicLibrary,the
HotelMonacois a gay-friendly
Greekseaport-inspired
fourstarhotel.What'smore,the
hotelis superpetfriendly-no
extrachargefor sizeor weight
limitations.
Dogsittinganddog
itinerariesareavailable.
Bestyet?
AVIP(veryimportantpets)register
andmonogrammed
dogcoatsfor
the rainyweather(everytimeyou
buyone,Monacodonates$1Oto
the KingCountyHumane
Society).
(monaco-seattle.com)
andWestHollywood,
it is across
fromtheGrove,
walkingdistance
to MuseumRow,Melroseand
CBSStudios(sotakein a show).
(farmersdaughterhotel.com)
HotelMaya,LongBeach,Calif.
A gaggleof gaysdescended
on
queer-friendly
HotelMayafor Long
BeachPride,butthe pullto plush
bedswith inlaidstoneheadboards
andprivatebalconies
overlooking
the LongBeachwaterfrontkept
somefromthefestivitiesall
together.Oneof JoiedeVivre's
pet-friendlyboutiquehotels,Latin
American-inspired
HotelMaya
offersa placewhereyoucandrink
in poolsidecabanas,
eatcevicheat
theiroutdoorrestaurant
or snuggle
nextto thefirepitandwatchthe
boatscomein. Udvhotels.com)
[AnnaBellePeterson,
Kristin
A.
Smith,DianeAnderson-Minshall
andEleniSt~phanides]
Farmer'sDaughter
Hotel,West
·Hollywood,
Calif.
DoesL.A.saycountry?Probably
not,butFarmer'sDaughter-a
boutiquehotelwithcountry-styled
roomsandSouthern
hospitalitywill haveyoubootscootin'in no
time.Evenbetter,thehotelborders
thesupergayareasof Hollywood
GAYGAMBLING
INNEWENGLAND?
butthat Foxwoods
will makeroomfor sexualminoritiesin its Employment
Thistimeofyear,thousands
areflocking
to NewEngland
toseethe
EqualityPolicy(whichnowincludessexualorientation,
genderidentity
famedfallcolors,
withtreesdecked
out in shades
ofcrimson,
gold
andexpression)
makingtheover8,000-person
workforceevenmore
andevergreen.
Butwe'vefoundanevenmoreexciting
reason
to
queerandtrans-friendly.
Additionally,
its MinorityVendorProgram
will
visit.Foxwoods
Resort
andCasino,
in Mashantucket,
Conn.,
isthe
alsonowincludeLGBT,
alongwithotherminoritiesthatget
quintessential
gambler's
playground,
withsixcasinos,
priorityconsideration.
7,600slots,
theonlyWPTWorld
PokerRoomin New
England
andoneofthelargest
bingohallsin thecountry.
"TheMashantucket
PequotTribalNationis nostrangerto
discrimination
andthe strugglefor dignityandequality,dating
That's3,600seatsofhighstakesbingo-andlesbians
love
theirbingo.
Withthreehotels,
morethan30 restaurants,
asfar backasthe early17thcentury,"saidMashantucket
a luxurious
spa,24 retailshops
andfiveentertainment
PequotGamingEnterprises
ChiefMarketing
OfficerRobert
venues,
Foxwoods
isa gamers
paradise.
Buttheresort
Victoria."AtFoxwoods
ResortCasino,
we sympathize
with
recently
tooknewstepstoprotect
LGBT
workers,
the plightof anypeoplestrivingto receivethedignity,
making
it a queerparadise
aswell.In honor
ofLGBT
acknowledgement
andrespectpursuedbyhumankind
PrideinJune,Foxwoods--owned
bytheMashantucket
Pequot
Tribal
as a whole,andwe areproudto enactthis initiativeonbehalfof our
employees,
as wellasthe LGBT
community
at large."
Nation-announced
policies
thatwillofficially
recognize
andprotect
the
rightsofLGBT
resortcasino
employees,
notjustfortourism
buttobe
What'sevenbetter?Votingwithyourwallet.Hip,happening
anduber
in accordance
withnewtriballaws.Thismeans
thattheirstafftraining
gay-friendly,
Foxwoods
is nowthe placefor youto takeyourladyand
programs
include
procedures
toincrease
LGBT
awareness
andsensitivity, possiblywin somecashalongtheway.[E.S.andD.A.M.]
48
Icurve
DOWN AND DERBY: The Insider's Guide To Roller Derby {Soft Skull Press)
At first,it maybedifficultto trustsomeone
whogoesbythenameof "Axlesof Evil"or "KaceyBomber"as anexpert,but
BomberandEvil(whoalsogobyJenniferBarbeeandAlexCohen)
havecollaborated
to provideuswith oversevenyearsworth
of insiderknowledge
onthe roughandtumbleworldof rollerderby.It's a how-tomanualoneverything
derby.Asmembers
of the L.A.DerbyDollssince2003,theauthorsusetheirpersonalexperience,
coupledwith a well-researched
historyof the
sport,to writethisguide.A must-read
for anyderbygirl,rollerwannabe
or fanof thetrack.(softskull.com)
[NicoleVermeer]
REVIEWSMusic Watch
UncommonRoots
New Orleans-inspired sounds, beyond the bayou. By Margaret Coble
25,PattyLarkin
(Signature
Sounds):
ThelasttimeI heardPatty
Larkinlive,it wasjust herwith
herguitaronthenightstage
at theMichigan
Womyn's
MusicFestival.
Manya singer
wouldhavebeenswallowed
upin thatbigspace,but
notLarkin.Hermostrecent
album,25,is likeonefabulous
concert,withstripped-down
acousticversionsof 25 of
herfavoritelovesongsand
a guestlistthatreadslike
anindiefan'sdream:Janis
Ian,ErinMcKeown,
Cheryl
Wheeler
andmore.It's no
surprisethat"ComingUpfor
Air" is a standoutbecause
JenniferKimballis usedto
wrappinghersupplesoprano
arounda leadvocalto create
lovelyharmonies.
Larkin's
intricate,guitarworkon
"Tango"
will haveyoureaching
for oxygen.
"GoodThing,"
withDarWilliams,is slower
thantheoriginalbutjust as
expressive.
MaryChapin
Carpenter
addshersensuous
altoto "Chained
to These
Lovin'Arms."Guitargod
BeppeGambetta
addsacoustic
heftto "St.Augustine."
The
albumendswith"I'm Fine,"
complimented
bytheclose
harmonies
of TheNields.
I'm notwaitinguntilshe's-at
Michigan
again;I wantherin
myheadphones.
Youwill too.
[JamieAnderson]
s2
Icurve
Living in New Orleans, I'm exposed to a wide range of
"roots" music-blues, jazz, folk, bluegrass and more.
This month's featured albums all draw on various roots
sounds but come from somewhat unlikely sources:
a quirky Norwegian: female quartet; an out-queer
playwright, spoken word artist and singer-songwriter
originally from the suburbs of Chicago; and an '80s
New Wave icon with a four-octave vocal range.
A richly textured, roots-inspired
Le Pop, Katzenjammer
(Nettwerk):Coming off its
first U.S. tour, including a few Lilith Fair dates,
Katzenjammer has a good buzz going. And its
jubilant, 12-track debut, originally released in 2008
overseas, has hit American shores recently, keeping
that buzz alive. This album very aptly captures the
quartet's amazing energy and obvious talent. From
the opening circus-carousel sounds of "Tea With
Cinnamon" to the high-spirited mariachi-polka of
"A Bar in Amsterdam" to the piratical sea shanty
"Hey Ho on the Devil's Back;' bandmembers Solveig
Heilo, Anne Marit Bergheim, T urid Jorgensen and
Marianne Sveen prove themselves to be gifted
vocalists and clever instrumentalists, utilizing every-
in the end that is exactly what
sound that still somehow
manages to have widespread
pop appeal. They are a bit all
over the place, musically, but
I love about this album.
er
w
~
~
~
z
w
thing from banjos, mandolins, guitars and trumpets,
to accordions, xylophones, kazoos and melodicas
for a richly textured, roots-inspired sound that still
somehow manages to have widespread pop appeal.
"Play-My Darling, Play" mixes bluegrass with Celtic
folk, 'J\in't No Thang" goes a more bluesy route and
"Demon Kitty Rag" is a knee-knockin' ragtime rollick.
They are a bit all over the place, musically, but in
the end that is exactly what I love about this album.
(katzenjammer.com)
~
~
~
ijl
(j)
f2
(j)
~
i
~
~
~
~
<I'.
~
ed~nfantasys
Oompa!,SabrinaChap (ERT):The leadoff
song, "Blueprint for Destruction;' on Chap's
sophomore musical release might leave you
thinking she's doing her best Ani Difrancodoes-New-Orleans
impression, but keep
listening: Chap's got more tricks up her
sleeve. "Never Been a Bad Girl" is a cheeky,
cabaret-style jazz number (the video for
which features New York City's Lower East
Side queer scene star Murray Hill),"Carolina"
is a bouncy bluegrass cut, "Failed Waitress/
Failed Astronaut" is languid Dixieland jazz
and "Nobody Home to Sing the Blues;' is,
well, the blues. The entire album is exquisitely
produced and Chap's vocals are rich and spoton, across many diverse styles. This album
deserves more attention than it's getting, and
Chap deserves to be a star. (sabrinachap.com)
her wish, and works with a Dream Team of
A-list players-B.B. King, Allen Toussaint,
Jonny Lang, Charlie Musselwhite and Ann
Peebles, among others. You might wonder
if she can pull it off, but make no mistake,
Lauper nails it. From the harmonica-blues
of the opening "Just Your Fool;' to the New
Orleans-style piano R&B of "Shattered
Blues;' to the Bobby Blue Bland classic"Early
in the Morning;• to the upbeat honky-tonk
blues of "Rollin' _and Tumblin; " Lauper's
voice works. The production is impeccable,
and the song choice is diverse and interesting.
What a pleasant surprise. (cyndilauper.com)
■
II DiscoverSex
{. ~
FunShopping
withFriends
•L •Reviews: real opinions
-1_. from real people
X
MemphisBlues,Cyndi Lauper(Downtown):
Cyndi Lauper has had a long and illustrious
career since her early, yellow-haired'80s New
Wave days, racking up album nods, as well as
a whole host of other musical awards. She's
made albums of folk, pop, dance, classics,
jazz and other genres, but recording a set
of blues covers has been a desire of hers for
en years. With this 12-cut disc she finally gets
Sexis magazine:
discover your own is
Speak up:
J forums
and polls
,,,,
Connect to toy
~~ makers: Edenlink
""'
Fun to follow:
EdenCafe blog
,
Get personal:
!!.--. interviews
www.edenfantasys.com
(800) 350-9050 Mon-Fr 8 am-4 pm ET
@ edenfantasys
facebook@ edenfantasys
w
:iE
<(
::],
z
w
~
I
Other Licks
_
reduce your
w
0
z
carbon
footprint
~
0
ct
~
0
0
~cc
0
z::)
FleshTone
Kelis
:5
z (lnterscope)
~
Cl)
iI:
LoveAndIts Opposite Synthesis
OJRap
TraceyThorn
(Merge)
(MinistryOfSound)
MySoul
LeelaJames
(Stax)
cc
0
E, Fouryearsis a long
Q.
0
timeto waitfor a
I
ai newalbum,but
0
cc
sometimes
it's worth
~0
it. Takinga decidedly
w
uf electronic
turn,this
:J
w
non-stop10-track
~
0
zw discis oneof the
w
~
summer'sbestdancect
popsoundtracks.
w
a..
"Acapella"and"4th
~
of July"arealready
~w hugehits,whilethe
3::
z eurodisco
"Intro"and
z
blippy
techno
"22nd
~
z Century"
aremyfaves.
w
UJ
(iamkelis.
com)
Cl)
::)
::)
J
J
+.
make your
w
Fromthe momentI
first heardThorn's
voiceon the first
EverythingButThe
Girlalbumin 1984,
I was in love.That
hasn'tchanged,and
this latestsolorelease
is like reconnecting
with an old friend.
Stark,simpleand
beautifullyarranged,
Thorntacklesthe
complexitiesof
relationships
and
life, everin flux.
(traceythorn.com)
Following
up her1999
debutdiscLearning
Curve,here'sanother
gorgeous,
lushalbum
fromthequeenDJ
of drumandbassto
addto ourcollection.
Don'texpectskittering
beats,though-this
is sophisticated
but
purepop-electronica,
fromthe melodic
"GivingIt AllAway"to
the rocking"InYour
Corner"to theelectro
beatsof "FinallyGetTo
You."(djrap.com)
Mixingthesoul
traditionof singerslike
ArethaFranklin,
Mavis
StaplesandGladys
Knightwithproduction
valuesof contemporary
R&B,Jamesturns
outa variedbut
consistent
modern
soulalbumthatopens
withthepowerfully
defiant"I Ain'tNewTo
This"andendswith
theemotional
"It's
Over"-with a whole
lotof heartin between.
(lee/ajames.
com)
girl proud!
Subscribe to our interactive
digital edition and get curve
in your inbox before it hits
the stands.
REVIEWSIn The Stacks
Three,Two, One, Action!
Books to inspire the inner stuntwoman in all of us. By Rachel Pepper
JoanJett,ToddOldham
(Ammo):"Peoplealwayscall
JoanJettan'icon,'andit kind
of pissesmeoff.Notbecause
she'snotaniconbutbecause
thatwordtendsto glossover
thefactthatsheisa totalweirdo
whocontinues
to makegreat
music,"writesBikiniKill's
Kathleen
Hannain theforewordof thisbook.Whether
youcallJettaniconfor her
music,heroft-replicated
shag
haircutorfor beinga tough
chickwhoknowshowto
wielda guitar,thisbookwill
appealto yourfanaticism.
Chronicling
the life of the '?Os
rockgoddess,
everychapter
tellsthestoryfromJett's
perspective,
beginning
with herchildhood,
intoher
infamous
Runaways
yearsand
reaching
all thewayto the
Blackhearts.
Thebackstage
snapshots
andglamourpies
thateditorandfashionicon
ToddOldhampullstogether
makethisbookexceptional
andhelppainta refreshingly
uneditedimageof the iconic
artist.It'sgoodenoughto be
displayed
onyourowncoffee
tableor theoneat yourlocal
dykecafe.[LiskaKoenig]
54
I curve
Streb, offers up action
This month, real-life women of action tell their stories.
Pam Grier's memoir tackles race, sex and runaway
horses, while Elizabeth Streb's book serves as a guide
to becoming your very own action hero.
riding motorcycles and dancing with companies in
San Francisco and New York, where she still makes
her home. In 2003, Streb took over a vacant loading
dock in Brooklyn and established the much-beloved
Streb Lab for Action Mechanics (SLAM), a place of
courage, cunning, contortionism and queer urban
cheekiness. Most of the text of Streb is concerned
with the mechanics ·of space, place and time and how
'extreme action" dance can subvert these notions.
Irritated by the traditional, rigid world of classical
ballet, Streb writes that she wanted"to find a way to be
true to my own experience of action;' which included
wanting to fly.Much of the choreography that evolved
from these early ambitions became stunt-oriented,
and pushed her willing accomplices into exciting, often
dangerous territory: evading pendulums of cement
blocks, spinning on a wheel, running up walls and
generally challenging the conventional parameters of
dance. Enjoy Streb's book as you would a performance,
or a visit to a foreign country. The knowledge you'll
glean on the journey through its pages makes the trip
worthwhile. (feministpress.org)
Foxy:
MyLifeinThree
Acts,PamGrier(Springboard):
Many
lesbians know Pam Grier as the actress who played Kit
Streb:HowtoBecome
an Extreme
ActionHero,Elizabeth Porter on The L Word. Kit, a recovering alcoholic and
Streb(Feminist
Press):Elizabeth Streb is the founder the owner of The Planet cafe, was one of the series'
of STREB, a pioneering dance company specializing best-developed characters: (mostly) straight but funky,
in "extreme action" choreography. She is an out dating across the gender spectrum and always ready
for some fun. Grier was handpicked to play Kit by the
lesbian with an impressive list of accomplishments,
show's producers and added some professional cred
which include a Guggenheim Fellowship, National
to an otherwise unknown cast (except for Jennifer
Endowment for the Arts grants and a MacArthur
Fellowship (nicknamed the Genius Award). Streb's first Beals, of course). Before there was Kit Porter, though,
book is not so much an autobiography as a manifesto. there was FoxyBrown,Grier's breakout film from 197 4.
It's divided into nonsequential sections, including One of the era's best-known blaxploitation movies,
"Body;' "Motion" and 'The Real Move:' Anna Deavere shot with an urban, African American audience in
Smith, the acclaimed playwright, actor and New York mind, Foxy Brown, as well as its predecessor, Coffy,
University professor, supplies the foreword, in which made Grier a star. Since then, she has appeared on TV
she calls Streb a "brilliant rascal:'
and in many other films, including Quentin Tarantino's
Streb's own childhood is sketched out briefly. She JackieBrown.In her fast-paced autobiography, written
was a tomboyish child who enjoyed downhill skiing, with Andrea Cagan, Grier traces her rise to fame,
helping her father with construction projects and starting with her childhood growing up in a military
performing brave feats. These include extracting a family.-Sexuallyassaulted as a child and young woman,
fishhook from an eel at age 8, which incited a nearby Grier is open about the abuse-both the devastating
group of fishermen to cheer "good fella!" This, she effect it had on her and the strength she developed to
writes, made her "hugely proud for hours and hours:' survive it. The book also chronicles Grier's relationships
Armed with a burning ambition to succeed, Streb soon with stars like basketball player Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
became an unstoppable "human action machine;' and actor Freddie Prinze, as well as her brush with
•
m
~
§
~
~
~
E
3
~
a:
~
fil
Q+A
Rachel Venning
Lesbian sexperts Rachel Venning and Claire
Cavanah have been running the womanfriendly sex boutique Babeland for nearly
20 years, setting up stores in Seattle and
New York. Last year, the two collaborated
on writing Moregasm:Babeland'sGuide to
Mind-BlowingSex. Venning gives us her
take ~n the how-to guide.
Who'stheintended
audience
foryourbook?
Anyone who's at a transition point in their
sexual journey, whether they're just starting
out ... coming out of a relationship or even
if they're still in the relationship but they're
at some new phase of"Let's explore all these
things and try things together:'
Howis it differentfromothersexbooks?
There are some good sex guides, but they
tend to fall into the category of either the
encyclopedic ones that have sort of everything from analingus to zoophilia-good
for reference, but not fun. And then there
::i-
UJ
(/)
:::i
0
a:
~
J
a:
UJ
a.
Q
~
f
i
a:
0
~
J
J
~
(/)
l:
~
;:i
cancer. Still, it's her rise to Hollywood fameshe was discovered working as a receptionist
at American International Pictures-and her
continued success as an actor that give this
book its heart. About the blaxploitation movement, she writes, "To me, what really stood out
about the genre was women of color acting like
heroes rather than depicting nannies or maids.
We were redefining heroes as school teachers,
nurses, mothers and street-smart women who
were proud of who they were:' Grier also did all
her own stunts, even though the outcome was
so~etimes unexpected. She was riding a runaway stallion, on-a shoot in Rome, as it crashed
through from the set of her film, Arena, into
Federico Fellini's Amarcord, causing the
acclaimed director to mutter,"My fantasy has
come true;' at the sight of her. "If you needed a
woman of color to handle a gun, do a wheelie
on a chopper, or fall off a cliff into a rice paddy,
I was the one to call;'she writes. Grier's amazing
rise to fame as a black woman in racist America
will continue to inspire young women. Foxy
will give Grier's fans the backstory they've
been waiting for, proving again that hard
work and resilience, mixed with a passion for
life, will take you far. (springboardpress.net)
■
are ones that are glossy, with Barbie and Ken
photographs. We wanted to make a book
that had really good information that was
presented in a fun way, and that was also
visually very appealing and a little bit quirky
and individualistic-not so formulaic.
Howis it organized?
It starts with anatomy and physiology. The
second part of the book is all about knowing
yourself. Then we move into communication,
which is about asking for what you want.
Talkaboutthequeercomponents
ofthebook.
The way that we incorporated queer stuff
-wasn't, like, oh, here's a lesbian chapter at
the end. We tried to really interweave that
throughout the book.
Whatpartsof thebookareyouproudest
of?
I'm proud of the way we did the sexual-
GoodPorn-A
Woman's
Guide
ErikaLust
(SealPress)
LuvYaBunches
LaurenMyracle
(AmuletBooks)
Fourawkwardpreteens(includingone
ErikaLusthasbeen
makingwomen-friendlywithtwo mommies)
uniteto bringdown
pornfor years,andit
showsin GoodPorn, the meanmiddleschoolqueenbee,
givingthe readera
Modessa.
Intheir
comprehensive
look
at the industry.Better plightfor fight (aka
chat-roommadness),
yet,it giveswomen
thetoolsto starttheir the girls"awesometatiously"discover
ownexploration
of
"friends4 life."A book
feministporn,with
for youngwomenand
everything
froma list
of pornterminology
to a cutereminderof
classicadultfilm titles. friendshipat anyage.
(abramsbooks.
com)
(sea/press.
com)
[SarahC.Jimenez]
[NicoleVermeer]
orientation fluidity, because this is a very
mainstream book. This is a book that's in
all the Borders and Barnes & Nobles in the
country. To be able to bring ... self-expression
and exploration, and get it into a very mainstream distribution felt really good.
I wasimpressed
at thebalanceof thedesign
andthequantityof information.
It can almost seem like it is going to be
fluffy, because it is a very well-designed
book. It was really important to us to get a
range of models, and more realistic-looking
people than is typical.
Werethereanytopicsthatyouwantedto talk
aboutbutfelt youdidn'thavespacefor?
No, not really. We wanted to do this great,
fun, accessible, empowering bpok, and I feel
like we did that.
Anything
elsethatyou'dliketo sharewith
curve readers?
Claire and I just feel very lucky to be in
the lesbian community, be lesbians, and be
so supported by our community and do
this work around sexuality in the world.
[LoriSelke]
RockPaperTiger
ByLisaBrackmann
.(Soho
Books)
TheCarousel
StefaniDeoul
(A&MBooks)
IraqveteranEllie
A strangerinfluences
hasfoundrefuge
a smallNortheastern
in the Beijingart
community
whenshe
community,
buta
inspiresthetownspeople
chanceencounter
with to rebuilda carousel.
A
a strangercatapults
brilliantandunsettJing
herintoa mazeof
mystery(witha lesbian
conspiracies.
Rock
twist) TheCarousel
PaperTigerprovides introduces
usto people
insightintomodern-day we mightnormally
Chinaandintotheworld ignorebutsoongrow
of a femalesoldierwho fondof.An intensenovel
questions
theroleof her aboutfriendship,
love
government
in a war
andheartache
it's also
shedidnotexpectto
inspirational
andfull of
fight.(sohopress.con1)hope.(aandmbooks.com)
[LiskaKoenig]
[Kathilsserman]
September 2010
I55
REVIEWSSapphic Screen
Meta MotionPictures
Directors come out from behind the camera. By Candace Moore
Daria:TheComplete
Animated
Series(MTV):
"I don'thavelowself-esteem.
I havelowesteemfor everyoneelse,"saysthecartoon
character
Daria.Foranyone
who'severfelt liketheodd
girloutin highschool,Daria's
cynicismandwry humorwas
well-deserved
comfortfood
for everybabydykein the
'90s.Alongwith herfriend
JaneLane,Dariatakes
on snootyFashionClub
members,ignorantteachers
andobnoxious
footballplayers,
andmakesus LOLin the
process.Morethan1oyears
havepassedsincetheshow
(anunlikelyspinoffof Beavis
andButt-Head}
first airedon
MTV.
Withits DVDrelease,
brightnewgenerations
of
girlswill undoubtedly
fall
victimto thisbespectacled
brainiac'scharms.The
eight-discsetcontainsall
fiveseasons,
as well astwo
specialmovie-length
episodes.
The"roughcut" pilot,"Sealed
Witha Kick,"is alsoincluded.
Theonlydownsideto the
newlyreleasedseriesis that
someof the originalmusic
hasbeenchanged,dueto
copyrightissues,but it's still
• wortheverypenny.Don't
passthis oneup-your
geekgirl creEIhangsin the
balance.
(dariaondvd.
com)
[lisa Gunther]
56
I curve
Both the experimental thriller The Owls and the
mockumentary The Baby Formula feature their
auteurs on-screen, as the films toy with genre and
genetics, respectively.
haunts the film, her dead body in the desert is also
a metaphor, illustrating the buried-in-time quality
of the past and the potential isolation of the future.
While the rotting corpse and a mysterious stranger
(hunky Skyler Cooper) are important elements in the
film, so too are the four main characters, who, finding
TheOwls(Peccadillo
Pictures):
The film is sun-flecked
rather than shadowy, as might befit a story about a that they can no longer drink and take drugs the way
dark secret. In this desert-set film noir, Cheryl Dunye they used to, must weigh their desire for new affairs
assumes the role of both filmmaker and character as against the reality of their longtime commitments and
she explores lesbian desire, subjectivity and history. face their ambivalence about taking on "adult" roles.
The Owls incorporates self-conscious genre play, The Owls eventually confesses that its generational
beyond the film's framed realities and realistic concerns outweigh its genre tropes. Interviews with
constructs, crafting its meditation on lesbian midlife members of the Parliament Collective, the brain trust
crises as a murder mystery and a ghost story. Opening
that collaborated on The Owls (and a nice pun on
Chaucer's Parliamentof Fowls),eventually share a split
with footage of queer activism, from AIDS-era ACT
UP protests to recent rallies against California's Prop. screen with the fictional storyline. "Owls;' it turns
8, the film uses the murder of a young dyke, Cricket
out, is a funny acronym for older, wiser lesbians and
(Itty Bitty Titty Committee'sDeak Evgenikos), as a seems like a premature obsession for Dunye and her
set. The figureheads of queer cinema involved in the
plot hook, implicating a foursome of 40-something
lesbians-Cheryl
Dunye, Guinevere Turner (Go making of this film are really just owlets, experienced
Fish,The L Word), Lisa Gornick (Tick Tock Lullaby) and contemplative, yet still relevant, vital and hip. No
and V.S. Brodie ( Go Fish)-who
are the true doubt they have much more to give. (theowlsmovie.com)
subjects of the film. Shots of the feathers, cacti,
TheBabyFormula(Wolfe):The notion of "womanly
skulls and animal hides that decorate the characters'
homes (which are also splashed with modern art and sperm'' is the sci-fi premise that stretches Alison
posters from their rock band glory days) tell a story of Reid's lesbian-mom mockumentary until it nearly
women who retain bohemian tastes but have acquired pops. After attempts to cat-burgle semen from stem
many domestic comforts. While Cricket's presence cell labs and family members, committed girlfriends
Q±A
Alison Reid
Alison Reid's IMDb resume reads like the
manifesto for a bona fide badass, from stunt
doubling in Shoot 'Em Up and X-Men: The
Last Stand to stunt coordinating two of the
Saw films,Reid is a woman not to betrifled
with. However, this self~professedadrenaline
junkie has found a new passion behind the
camera in directing the sci-fi mockumentary
The Baby Formula (see article left). Reid shares
the challenges of working with a real-life
pregnant cast, her daring dayjob and how a
near death experience inspired her to come out.
Howdidyoubecome
a stuntcoordinator?
My standard answer is I fell into it. I did my
first stunt when I was 17 years old and I just
craved excitement and I was sort of bored with
school and .. .I was a bit of an adrenalinejunkie
w
w
..J
so... I went after it, and managed to makea
f2,
~ career out of it.
ul Youcameoutafteryouwereinjured
ina stunt
z
§(.) gonewrong,canyoutellusaboutthat?
frl I was rolling a car off a ramp and ... there was
~
an explosion to go along with it
and it went just perfectly,the car
flew up in the air and came down
on its roo£ It wasn't until I took my
helmet off and my neck brace that
I realized something wasn't quite
right. So they took me to the hospital and of
course discovered that Cl, which is the very
top vertebrae,had a compression fracture. That
could've been my last moving moment or my
last moment alive.The attraction to women
had alwaysbeen in my being, I had sort of
suppressed it and that just came to the forefront as something I didn't want to suppress
anymore.
Howdidyougofromstuntsto directingThe
BabyFormula?
Ia wanted to do it for a very long time. I just
felt like I needed to bechallengingmyself in
different ways... and was interested in telling
stories that appealed to me.
Whatuniqueproblems
didworkingwitha
pregnant
castpresent
foryou?
Oh my God. [Laughs] What, like when they
go into labor when they're not supposed to in
the middle of a shooting day,
that kind of thing perhaps? I
wanted to shoot during the
Pride parade here in Toronto
and have Angela's water
break during the parade and
so we could make a bit of a scene of it and
throw her on the back of a Harley~Davidson.
And we were rehearsing that exact scene
when her water broke. For real.
Whatdoyouhaveplanned
next?
Well, plans are two-fold. I want to make
another feature film.And I want there to be
some stunts in this one. But I also very much
want to make a television series using The
Baby Formula characters.
OKhere'sa funquestion,
asidefromyour
partner,
whowouldyouchoseasyourstem-cell
babymama?
It's hard not to say Angelina Jolie. I was one
of her stunt doubles in Taking Lives.
Whowouldwinin an arm-wre lingmatch-you or ZoeBell?
•... .
Me.
. ,
[RachelShatto]
• • .' • ..
.
(.)
er
~
6
~
a:
:::)
!!!.
:::)
~
z
z
0
CD
a:
<{
:I:
(.)
(.)
er
w
cir
a:
w
~
g
..J
~
w
g
er
0
z
~
en
::E
::;
~
en
::i
:::)
[
..J
w
::E
a:
w
w
a:
0
z
~
..J
<{
cf
[jj
!;.
§
z
~
0
a:
0
(.)
~
::E
Athena and Lilith
become the first
women to prove
men unnecessary
to
procreation.
Comparing bulging tummies, they
allow· a camera crew to document their
private medical miracle: They are having
each other's biological babies. Reid plays
the documentary filmmaker who pushes
to stay with the action as the Sapphically
named pair have noisy lovers' spats, refuse
to be filmed or pull the shower curtain
closed on their candle-lit baths. The Baby
Form~la lambastes the hormonal surges,
dual cooing, prenatal yoga, hypervigilant
ultrasounds, topless gay Pride parades
and awkward family gatherings of a couple
enamored with their unique process of
conception. A baby-happy derivative of
such tongue-in-cheek films as Best in Show,
The Baby Formula (now on DVD) takes its
"what if" premise as far as it can but has
little in the way of plot-instead, the film
relies on the spontaneous hilarity of its
loony, punch-drunk and melodramatic
cast of ·characters. (wolfevideo.com) ■
DVD Picks
' .....- ..
t
•
r
•-
I
r• •• • r
I
,: •
--
Lord,SaveUsFrom
BehindtheBurlyO
Glee:TheComplete
(FirstRunFeatures) FirstSeason
YourFollowers
(Thunderstruck
Films)
(20thCenturyFox)
Thisfilmoffersa
ThisBrazilian
film is a
glimpseintothe
touchingtributeto that Thisdocattemptsto
Gleeis abouta group
worldof
age-oldconundrum- engagein an unbiased glamourous
of kidstryingto make
burlesque.
Archive
relationships.
Marina conversation
about
it to stardom-orat
footageandinterviews leastoffof thelowest
movesto thecity
religion,butgrows
withstarsof the
hopingto becomean
tiresomewhenthe
rungonthehighschool
genr~ncluding Kitty ladder.
actor,butis distracted narratormocksthe
Theshowis
West,Tempest
Storm
bylovewithmusician separation
of church
complete
withqaby
Justine.Alongthe
andstate.Weapplaud andBlazeStarrdramaanda touching
chronicle
thehistoryof coming-out
way,herflatmates,
thefilm's critiqueof
story.It
including
a transwoman,intolerance,
butnotits thissexyandsubversive featuresa talented
experience
theirown
condescending
attitude formoftheatrical
cast,including
Jane
This
romanticencounters toward"gaylifestyles." entertainment.
Lynchwhoclearlywas
nostalgicandinform- putonEarthto playSue
asthefilmtiestogether Themessage-"God
ativedocwill leaveyou Sylvester,
threedifferent
stories lovesyou,butnot
thehard-ass
wantingto knowmore. cheerleading
about,well,relationwhatyoudo."Pass.
coach.
(firstrunfeatures.con1)(foxconnect.con1)
ships.(figafilms.con1) (/ordsaveusthemovie.con1)
[Anna
[LiskaKoenig]
BellePeterson]
[LisaGunther]
[LisaGunther]
Paulista
(FiGaFilms)
September 2010
I57
REVIEWSTech Girl
How Gay Is Your Phone?
What you don't know about your service provider might surprise you. By Serena Freewomyn
Today's headlines are filled with stories of corporate misdeeds and
fiscal irresponsibility. The banks are failing and Big Oil is killing the
oceans. Sometimes it seems like the world's problems are so big that
the average person can't make a difference. But that's actually not the
case. Little things-like which cell phone company you choose-can
make a big difference.
The January 2010 issue of Consumer Reports rates the four major
cell phone providers in the U.S. on cost, data plans and overall
customer satisfaction. If you're looking for the best financial deal,
this report is very helpful. Unfortunately, the report says nothing
about political track records or LGBT support.
Luckily, there is someone who is looking into these important
criteria. The HRC Corporate Equality Index has compiled detailed
feedback about many major corporations. Its evaluation is based on
the following criteria:
• Nondiscrimination
policiesmustincludesexual
orientation
andgenderidentity
• Employee
benefitscoversame-sex
partners
• Benefits
includetransgender-inclusive
health
insurance
coverage
• Thecompany
mustprovideLGBTcompetency
training
• Thecompany
is committed
to LGBTpublic
engagement,
including
philanthropy
• Thecompany
doesnotsupportcausesthatwould
hurttheLGBT
community
58
Icurve
HOWDIFFERENT
CARRIERS
RATE
AT&Thas an HRC rating of 100 percent. It includes both sexual
orientation and gender identity in its nondiscrimination policy. AT&T
provides domestic partner benefits for its employees, and transgender
health care is fully covered under the company's plan. AT&T also
provides training for managers on LGBT employment issues and is a
financial supporter of LGBT causes.
•
Sprint also has a 100 percent rating from the HRC, though
Consumer Reports scores Sprint lower on its data plans and overall
customer satisfaction.
Verizonhas a 70 percent rating because its nondiscrimination policy
does not include gender identity, and the company actively opposed a
measure from its shareholders that would have added gender identity
to the policy.
CREDO
Mobileis another mobile provider that was not ranked by the
HRC because it has fewer than 500 employees. However, that doesn't
mean it isn't LGBT-friendly. Its nondiscrimination policy covers
sexual orientation and gender identity and provides limited health
care coverage for transgender employees. The HRC does recognize
CREDO as a responsible corporate citizen. And no wonder-since
the company was founded in 1985, CREDO/Working
Assets
has raised $65 million for progressive causes and supports groups
such as the Gay, Lesbian, Straight Education Network (GLSEN),
Planned Parenthood and the Ms. Foundation for Women.
. The LGBT community is estimated to have $712 billioh in'buying
power, according to research by Witeck-Combs Communications
and Marketresearch.com. "Wireless providers are in overdrive
promoting their products and services. LGBT and other equalityminded consumers must hold them accountable by supporting
those that support us and avoiding companies and products in
the 'red' on equality;' says Eric Bloem, Deputy Director of HRC's
Workplace Project.
During tough economic times, it is hard to say which is more
important: saving money or supporting gay-friendly businesses.
However, businesses are also more apt to listen to their customers in
an economic downturn and lesbians are especially known for voting
with their wallets. ■
SERVICE
PROVIDER
AVERAGE
PRICE
CUSTOMER HRC
SERVICE
RANKING
AT&T
$86
$83
$83
$80
$70
66%
67%
75%
70%
100%
100%
70%
50%
N/A
N/A
Sprint
Verizon
TMobile
CREDO
Basedon Consumer
Reports
Surveyof 2-lineplanwith601-1000sharedanytimeminutes
~
()
0
f-
<£l.
er
w
....J
....J
w
~
z
~
:J
Cl
LGBTweet
Ten tweeters to follow now.
You've signed up for Twitter, added Ellen DeGeneres, Rachel Maddow and your girlfriend (in that order) to your
feed. So who do you add next? We've braved the questionable places that keywords like "lesbian" take you on
Twitter to suggest these 10 accounts to make your tweeting experience a dyketastic voyage. [YanaTallon-Hicks]
@bigqueer covers up-to-the-minute happenings in queer
news. This tweeter encourages "intelligent dialogue ... by, for
and about the LGBT community," and brings a legitimizing
balance to all those pop culture icons you also follow.
@lezgetreal gives you the quick skinny on a "gay girl's
view of the world," featuring news, noteworthy lesbians and
links to favorite "lezsites."
@bestlesbianweek is a gay gossip's best friend. These
tweets feature leztastic quotes and titillating tidbits with a
hilarious attention to detail that won't let you miss a thing.
@Babeland_ Toys will let you be the first to know about its
sexy promos, lip-biting giveaways and-ahem-educational tips. Not that you need them.
@TheQCC, queer crafters from queercraftercollective.com
share dykey DIY tips, crafty queers you can buy from and
details on the "crafternoons" they host in Washington, D.C.
Great for queers with kids, too.
@SuzeOrmanShow is full of advice, quips and personal
tidbits from the financial maven herself.
@dykerepublic, the owners of "Blog for Sophisticated
Dykes" is clever and helpful. Linking to boi-ish fashion
trends and articles to keep you in the know about everything from natural deodorants to "how to spot a dyke in
the Midwest."
@FemmesGuide follows a "sex-positive, femme, queer
collaborative blog focusing on gender, sexuality and life
as a femme." Their tweets offer yummy vegan recipes,
sewing tricks, book reviews and offer all things femmecentric to your perfectly manicured fingertips.
@dorothysnarker, one of our favorite gay girl pop
culture commentators, lets you follow her every snarky
thought. Updating her 4,500 plus followers-sometimes
every three minutes-it's never a dull moment with
Dorothy tweets.
@lesbiangeek and @lesbiangamers are sister sites and
sister Twitter feeds, offering up all manner of geek-related
news, from video game goodies and gadgets to lezzie
geek pop culture tweets. Micro-blogging doesn't get any
better than this.
15 MORE
CELESBIANS
TOFOLLOW:
@SandraBemhardt
@THEsaragilbert
@Courtenaysemel
@Lisa_BrookeMTV
@KimmyStolz
@amandapalmer
@staceyannchin
@theteganandsara
@ladygaga
@bridgetmcmanus
@samantharonson
@lindsaylohan
@shamimsarif
@katemoennig
@TheRealCurveg
September 2010
Io
.ASTROGRRL
Feel The Earth Move
Solid plans shift this September. Will you stay strong or be
swallowed up in the moment? By Charlene Lichtenstein
Virgo(Aug.24-Sept23)
Sex:Money can't buy you love. But it can buy expensive
dinners and lavish trips. You have to decide if she loves
you for your money or for your true sel£ Uh oh. Career:
Cash in on all your hard work this month. You may
get a raise or a promotion. If not, get a new job. Be the
corporate despot you always dreamed you would be.
Ubra(Sept.24--0ct.23)
Sex:Youare a babe magnet this month. Don't ask
why. Just make good use of time. Holiday planning
season is not that far off. Career:
You meet and greet
all the high~powered corporate players now. Can you
impress them with your savior faire and intelligence?
Scorpio(Oct.24-Nov.22)
Sex:She loves you but will not reveal all of her secrets
to you just yet. Will you be sufficiently intrigued
to continue probing? Maybe that's her plan. Career:
VIRGO(AUG.24-SEPT.23) Colleagues are moving and grooving behind the
I havealwaysfoundit amusing scenes at work. Are they going to get the advantage
(andsomewhat
arousing)
that over you? It will be highly unlikely if you can "out"
Virgoshavebeendesignated
as maneuver them.
theVirginsof the zodiac.Maybe
it's becausetheycanappearso Sagittarius(Nov.23-Dec.22)
formidableandseriousthat many Sex:Gal pals can turn into lovergrrls if you decide to
faintof heartwomendon'teven take that big step. Do you want to risk a perfectly good
try to breakthroughthatstiff friendship on a quick fling? Hmm. Career:Friends in
veneerto plumbtheirdepths.Fact high places make sure that you are protected from the
is,sisters,thesebabesarevixens
greater corporate forces.
underthesheets.Theyjust don't
believein advertising
all their
merchandise
beforethe general capricorn(Dec.23-Jan.20)
public.Goodthing,t0<r-no sense Sex:Look your very best at work so you can catch the
in gettingshopworn
fromtoo eyes of the power elite. A big executive takes a liking
muchroughhandling. to you. Will she also take a licking to you? Career:
Build your path to the very top through hard work
and political diligence. When all else fails, buy the
company and take over by force.
Aqu~rius(Jan.21-Feb.19)
Sex:You fall head over heels for an exotic delight. Will
you meet her close to home or on some faraway jaunt?
Keep your options open and, well, jaunty. Career:
Travel for business will bring extra rewards. And that
is more than just the padded expense account. Enjoy!
Pisces(Feb.2D-March20)
Sex:You are especially sexy now. Will you maximize
your allure and lure in the woman you truly desire or
60 Icurve
will you cast your net far and wide and trawl in any
and all? Let's guess. Career:Someone in power helps
you gain some power yoursel£ Use it for the corporate
good and not for evil and selfish gains. I guess we can
only hope.
Aries(March21-April20)
Sex:Keep a certain lady closely under surveillance.
It is not that your suspicions will be confirmed. It
is that her life is far more interesting than yours is
now. Career:Build up important relationships at
work. You never know who will get the upper hand
in the corporate chess game and you don't want to
be just another pawn.
Taurus(April21-May 21)
Sex:Find your next lovergrrl at work. Check out who
is percolating at the coffee machine and give her a
tour of your supply room. Career:Hard work will
bring its own rewards this September. But are these
particular rewards enough to encourage you to work
hard? Delegate where possible.
Gemini(May22-June21)
Sex:You are charming, flirty and very sexy right now.
Romance is in the air. Or is it dinner burning on the
stove? Career:Work is much more fun than usual.
Maybe that is because you are really working less and
getting away with it-for now.
cancer(June22-July 23)
Sex:There is a lot to be gained from reaching out to
family members now. Maximize your advantage by
pretending to compromise. But don't worry, you don't
really have to. Career:Develop your own political
cadre and see if you can take over the corporation.
Revolution or evolution? You decide.
Leo(July24-Aug.23)
Sex:Ask and you shall receive. Ask again and she will
be delighted. ]3ut don't push it. Keep expectations real.
Career:You are focused on the job and put all your
energies into it. Decisive action at work will get any
job done. But is that all there is to life? ■
Astrologer Charlene Lichtenstein is the
author ofHerscopes: A Guide to Astrology
for Lesbians. Get more at thestarryeye.com
orgo to her blogat thestarryeye.typepad.com.
~
Cl
~
....I
w
J:
()
~
OUTINFRONT
Community
Voices
These women spread the
activist word. By Sheryl Kay
says. "Not only is the general attitude queer,
phobic, it's even coded into law in some parts
of the state:'
Activism, she says, saved her. "For me, it's
just so obvious. Queer kids are getting beat
up, killing themselves and getting kicked out
of their homes. How the hell can you not do
something about it, if you're able tor"
MakingConnections
The LGBT community has to join with other
oppressed people including the poor, people of
color and new immigrants, says LindaStout.
"Only then can we build alliances strong
enough to overcome the powers working
against us;' she says. "None of us can do it
alone. We can't work separately and win:'
Stout grew up very poor in the rural south,
the daughter of a tenant farmer, and a 13th,
generation Quaker. The family didn't have a
bathroom or running water, notes Stout.
Hardest for her was living with all
the societal messages of "you're not good
Mississippi
Turning
Many readers will recall the case of Constance
McMillen, the brave young woman from
Mississippi. who challenged her school's
prom regulations by taking her girlfriend
(while wearing a tuxedo, no less). After briefly
cancelling the prom the school held another
prom that only McMillen and a student with
a developmental delay attended, while the
rest· of the student body attended a secret
dance held elsewhere.
What many of us didn't read about was the
Mississippi Safe Schools Coalition, and one of
its members, IzzyPellegrine,
who, in response
to the prom debacle, went to McMillen's
school district, and hosted a studen~s' rights
workshop and held a Second Chance Prom.
"Community involvement is something
I want to do for the rest of my life;' says
Pellegrine, a 20,year,old sophomore at
Mississippi State University. Ten years from
now, I hope to be post,doctorate and still
working towards policy change for LGBT
youth in Mississippi:'
Pellegrine knows there is still much work
in the South to be done. She was raised in
Jackson, Miss. and attended a very strict
Catholic school where she could have easily
been expelled for being an out lesbian. And the
overall community vibe wasn't much better.
"Honestly, it's ridiculous down here;' she
enough, not smart enough, not a whole
person;' eventually becoming something
she believed about herself. "Even though I
was never taught this from my family, I got
the messages ... everywhere else I went;' she
recalls. "Oppression in itself is bad enough,
but when it becomes internalized, it is the
hardest to overcome:'
Today Stout serves as the founder and
executive d1rector of Spirit in Action in
Belchertown, Mass., a national non,profit
organization that connects activists and others
who are passionate about working collectively
for lasting social change by offering leader,
ship and other networking programs. Keep
an eye out for her upcoming book, Collective
Visioning: Creating the World We Want to
Live In, a summary of ways to incorporate
62 j curve
=-------
-
- - - ---
positive actions into community activism
and daily life, and tools for building trust and
relationships.
FindingStrengthin Anger
She'll tell you her personality was shaped
by having activist parents, fantastic siblings
and by surviving a lot of bullying, teasing and
taunting when she was growing up.
Today, PamelaMerritt,is the Angry Black
Bitch. No judgments here. That's how Merritt
refers to herself, and her widely circulated
blog of the same name.
"If you're not angry, you are not paying
attention;' says Merritt, a St. Louis native
who also goes by Shark,fu. 'Tm angry at
injustice, at the thought of having the masses
vote in favor of or against my rights, poverty,
hunger, greed, ignorant politicians, valueless
family value voters and on and on and on:'
Blogging, says Merritt, is a lot like therapy,
only cheaper, and it provides her with a vehicle
where she can share her. online activism as
well as stories about her offiine activism.
"Immigrant rights, reproductive justice,
anti,racism and anti,poverty work are
all of concern· and all impact the LGBT
community;' she observes. "I stand in awe of
the work grassroots activists do every day to
represent and empower all LGBT people:'
Despite the challenges, Merritt has enough
faith in equality and social justice that she can
get up every morning believing that LGBT
Americans will be granted full protection
and civil rights within her lifetime.
"They call social justice movements
strugglesfor a reason;' she says. "I not only
reflect on how far we've come in so many
areas but I keep reminding myself that it
took time and dedication. Most importantly,
success demands faith in the outcome. And
I believe:' ■
a:
:5
5
~
_J
w
<(
I
()
~
_J
::,
a:
Trekking continued from page 47
admitted. I also loved it, despite crying out in
pain when the Ethiopian masseuse kneaded
my sore calves.
After dinner, we retired to the lounge for
• coffee and apple tobacco smoked from a
hookah. "Take a picture of me exhaling!" a
usually reserved Geri insisted. 'Tm telling
my kids it's Lebanese hasheesh!" Laughter
ricocheted along with tales of wild drug years
and college antics. Before retiring at midnight,
I had an"it can't get better than this" moment.
The group chemistry was electric.
DAY3: PETRAAND ISRAEL
At 5 a.m., the summon to prayer echoed
from loudspeakers in mosque minarets,
jarring me from sleep. Another day_of travel
began early, and by. mid-morning we were
in Petra, a sixth century B.C. Nabataean
city carved out of rock. Descending the
ravine to the rose-hewed stone temple that
was featured in the film Indiana Jones and
The Last Crusade, horse-drawn carts raced
madly across the stone floor, with dozens of
Jordanian men riding donkey and horseback
and tchocthke-hawkers swarming.
The BBC describes Petra as 'one of the ten
places you have to see before you die:'I concur.
The scale and historical imprint were indelible.
We hiked through the vast city and climbed
a miles-long trail to the ancient sacrificial
altar atop the Temple plateau. Once there, we
spontaneously shed hiking boots and undulated gleefully to the sound of a local Bedouin
woman's flute playing.
During the eight hours we scaled Petra,
I noticed Robin, who had nearly given up
two days ago, had quickened her pace. "I feel
stronger;' she smiled. Two hours later,
we were at the Israeli border undergoing
stringent security checks. On the Israeli side,
I joined the group at their hotel for our final
communal meal: tradition~ Sabbath dinner.
The group would trek Israel's southern desert
the next day, but professional commitments
beckoned me back to Tel Aviv.
Some of us received Hebrew blessings
over the wine and bread, a Russian singer
wearing go-go boots and silver sequined
miniskirt crooned '80s tunes in the hotel
lobby. It was surreal.
After dinner I found it tough saying goodbye. I wanted to continue with the group
despite the grueling hikes ahead. I hated to
break my bond with the others.
En route to Tel Aviv,I remembered something Judy had explained in Petra earlier that
day. "These trips are conducive to laughter
and interaction. We share something you
can't share with anyone else and form bonds
we'll always have in common:' Months later,
as I draw on memories and reply to an e-mail
from one of my distant traveling friends, I
realize she was right. ■
TOP150QUEER
WOMEN
PHOTO
CREDITS:
AndrewSoutham
(2),
DanaEdelson
(4),BoValentine/filmmagic
(5),RobinRoemer
(6),
NaomiKaltman/Showtime
(7),VirginiaSherwood
(8),ChadSlattery
(12),NaomiKaltman/Showtime
(13),MatthiasClamer/FOX
(14),
JudyFrancesconi
(15),VirginiaSherwood
(17),CharlieGowins(22),
Pamela
Littky(27),
LeslieVanStelten(28),AndrewMacpherson
(29),
MontyBrinton(32),TonyDonaldson/tdphoto.com
(33),BeckStarr
(36),PaulMichaud/Showtime.
(39),KerryKrenzin
(42),Courtesy
Food
Network
(44),LaceyTerrell(49),JamesSorensen/2008
CrownMedia
(51), RyanForbes
(53),JaimieTrueblood
(55),AustinYoung(56),
JeriHeiden(60),makoto2007
(61),JDDisalvatore
(65),RheaAnna
(67),Olivia(70),RogerErickson/FOX
(71),AbigailCruz(72),Luciana
Pampalone
(73),CharlieHopkins/Time
Warner(74),MontyBriton(75),
BrettPatterson
(77),DavidCooper
(78),ZackArias/Usedfilm
(80),
ChrisBaldwin(82),MariaSchriber
(84),George
Napolitano
(85),David
Fenton
(86),RupertTaper(87),AnthonyMandler(93),LydiaDaniller
(94),FrankieFrankeny
(95),SylvainGaboury
(96),LisaSandor(100)
__.)
make your Africandreamscometrue.
r r)nt
11f)
Ht
rJ'
I
•
1
I
dr
lrJ,
,d
1
,1tdJ
111
r,'
1,
1+,
Iii
,f ,,
,1
1
1
sublime
JOU
E
l .877.805.7969
disco 1er u lim
September 2010 f
TOPTENREASONS
WELOVE
...
Jeanne
C6rdova
By Victoria A. Brownworth
A lesbian activist, writer, ex-nun and social worker, Jeanne Cordova has spent her
adult life championing the rights of lesbians. Her upbringing, as the daughter of
a strong New York Irish mother and a social justice-oriented Mexican American
father, led her to think she could do anything. She is the author of an upcoming
memoir and an organizer of the Butch Voices Conference to be held Oct. 8-10 in
Los Angeles. Cordova has all the traits we love in a butch-and
1. She'sa cross-gendered
loverofwomen."My
earliest oppression is being cross-gendered;'
explains Cordova. She defines herself as
having been born a woman yet identifying
with her masculine side, too. "I like my boi
clothes and style:'
2. Sheusedto be a nun.After high school,
"I was there at the start
of a new movement
being born within the
great family of LGBT
people, but here the
B stands for butch."
64
Icurve
then some.
6. Shehelpedorganize
ButchVoices.
The first
conference was held in 2009 in Oakland,
Cali£ Cordova lead the organization of
the L.A. conference. She explains that the
conference was an awakening for her. "I
was there at the start of a new movement
being born within the great family of LGBT
people, but here the B stands for butch:'
Cordova joined the Sisters of the Immaculate
Heart of Mary, an order that was dedicated to the radical changes of Vatican II,
and that protested the Vietnam War. She
wrote about her experiences in the convent
in her first memoir, Kicking the Habit-A
Lesbian Nun Story. She was also included in
a groundbreaking collection Lesbian Nuns:
Breaking Silence.
Her partner just turned 49 and Cordova is
acutely aware that growing older is different_
for femmes than it is for butches. She thinks
femmes are made to feel less lesbian because
of their appearance and looks, when they
are actually fighting a different kind of
homophobia, in the workplace and beyond.
3. She'sa life-longactivist.Post-convent she
8. She's concernedaboutthe inclusionof
became the president of the Los Angeles
chapter of the Daughters of Bilitis, the first
lesbian rights organization in the country. As
queerness mainstreamed, so did she, becoming
president of the Stonewall Democratic Club,
where she led the statewide campaign in
California to elect 88 openly gay delegates to
the i980 Democratic National Convention.
Latinasin the LGBTcommunity.
Half Latina,
Cordova wants Latinas to feel included
in all things LGBT. "Racism and ethnic
tensions easily divide us as a community;'
Cordova says.
7. Sheaddresses
theoppression
offemmes.
9. Shecreditstransgender
peoplefor raising
her butchconsciousness.
Before the Butch
Voices Conference, Cordova says she "never
4. Sheisdedicated
toendingbutchoppression. in my life got to rejoice and embrace being
Cordova feels that butch oppression is largely butch. It was not until transgender people
ignored, and notes that many butch women
opened the door that it was truly OK for
don't get jobs because they are obviously queer women to be masculine-that
it could be a
in the workplace. She feels that these issues for natural part of who you are."
butch women have yet to be addressed in the
LGBT community.
1 O. She'ssurvivedbreastandcoloncancer.
At 61, Cordova's taken on cancer and beat
5. She's an entrepreneurand a social it the way she's taken on so many issues in
worker.Cordovagot her master's degree her life. She's currently in remission, which
in social work at age 22 and wrote
means she can fight with
_her dissertation
on community
g{isto. "I feel stronger
2010 BUTCHVOICES
organizing in the lesbian community,
REGIONAL
CONFERENCES now. I'm buoyed up
despite her thesis advisor's denial
by the prospect of
New York,Sept.25
that such a community existed. She
the conference and
Portland,Ore.,Oct.2
also founded the Community Yellow
by the things to come
Los Angeles,Oct.8-1 O
Pages, which she ran until 1999.
in my life:' ■
JULY 31-AUGUST 7, 2010
Sweet Hawaiian Islands Cruise
Let's explore paradise together this summer.
UGUST 16-21, 2010
eet Salnwn Ri,a,er Rafti,ng
un, sun and friendship as we laugh our way
gorgeous Salmon River In Idaho.
1, 2010
l Pa~e
Resort
JULY 21-31, 2011
Sweet M~hu Pi.emu Ad'Venture
Immerse yourself In the myths, legends and history of the Inca.
CA[
877 793 3830
DISCO
R SWEET.COM
CST#2091766-40
See all items with this value
