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Description
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ToC Naming Our Desires (p28); An Impeccable Pair (p38); Rainbow Runway (p42); Nicole Pacent (p48); Elder Housing (p50); Violet Palmer(p54); Jill Bennett (p56); In the Spirit of Sappho (p66); Pilgrimage to P-Town (p70), Cover: Helen Mirren at 71 (p61).
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issue
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1
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Date Issued
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Feb-Mar 2017
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Format
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PDF/A
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Publisher
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Frances Stevens
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Identifier
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Curve_Vol27_No1_February-March-2017_OCR_PDFa.pdf
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extracted text
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HOW
TO
FIND
THE
LOVE
OF
YOUR
LIFE
RIGHT
NOW
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Women of
the World
first saw Helen Mirren in a TV rerun of the movie Age of
Consent, which she filmed in Australia in 1969, the same
year as the Stonewall riots. In her first major film role, she
played the feisty, feral, and voluptuous muse of a reclusive artist
who had set up his easel on an island in the Great Barrier Reef. I
remember thinking that the casting folks possibly hoped Mirren
would embody some type of Lolita-esque nymphette, but she
brought a lot more to the role than expected. I still remember her
standing naked in the water, holding a fishing spear and looking
more like a feminist Neptune than a pinup.
It's incredible to think that almost 50 years later Helen Mirren is
still going strong, grabbing top roles as powerful women-she is
adept at playing women of status, whether high-ranking military
personnel or royalty-and awards along with them. For a female
performer, her career longevity is unique in Hollywood, possibly
because she does not confine her talents to the film industry alone.
She has always seemed thoroughly authentic, always herself, and
I
2
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
yet true to whichever character she plays. She never quits, is always
in demand, and she averages several notable roles every year,
decade after decade.
We decided to put Helen Mirren on our cover this issue as a
symbol of feminine fortitude and eternal inspiration at any age.
After the results of the U.S. presidential election, we sure needed
an example of an older woman who is universally admired and
successful! Plus, Mirren recently gifted us her Prime Suspect
protagonist, JaneTennison, to include in the pantheon of characters
we always thought (hoped!) might be gay.
This is our first issue for 2017,and it focuses on the theme of Our
Generations. It's a tribute to older lesbians and to younger queer
women who are furthering the causes of our community. It also
hopes to strike an optimistic note. While 2016 did not deliver the
desired political results to many LBTwomen and feminists, as noted
by Victoria A. Brownworth in her Politics column, "History Deferred,"
we must continue to celebrate and support the women-especially
the older women-who are still in the game. And also the younger
queer women who are changing the game. Welcome, Curve guest
writers Nicole Pacent and Jill Bennett, who share their unique
perspectives this issue on spirituality and love.
Be sure to save the date for ClexaCon (March 3-5) in Las Vegas,
the inaugural media and entertainment convention for LGBTQ
women and allies: It will feature celesbian guests, speakers,
panelists, workshops, reunions, special events, and a film festivalwith a portion of the proceeds benefiting the Trevor Project. This
just might be one of the biggest multigenerational gatherings we've
seen yet.
And since we come out in time for Valentine's Day, I'd like to send
my community of feminists and queer women a Valentine's Day
message: Let's always be "stronger together." It's a borrowed phrase
that might now be lost, but it should not be forgotten.
MERRYNJOHNS
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF
merryn@curvemag.com
'}I @Merryn1
THE BEST-SELLING
LESBIAN
MAGAZINE
•
~OW
TOH~
INSMEULTI~ATE
OR
~sro11
www.curvemag.com
FEB/MAR
2017
FEATURES
28
NAMING OUR DESIRES
A new book of portraits
celebrates the gay and
bisexual women who forged
lesbian identity.
38
AN IMPECCABLE PAIR
Meet the friends who started
bespoke fashion label Kipper
Clothiers.
~2
RAINBOW RUNWAY
The queer fashion revolution
continues, coast to coast.
~8
NICOLE PACENT
The out bi actor reflects on her
spiritual journey.
50
ELDER HOUSING
Where will we live when we are
over the hill?
5~
VIOLET PALMER
Celebrating the career of a
super coach.
56
JILL BENNETT
The out lesbian actor on her
new young romance.
66
IN THE SPIRIT OF SAPPHO
Modern Greece has much to
offer vacationing lesbians.
70
PILGRIMAGE TOP-TOWN
This spot on Cape Cod has
long lured lesbians.
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
3
CONTENTS
FEB/MAR
2017
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
IN EVERYISSUE
4
EDITOR'S NOTE
6
CURVETTES
8
FEEDBACK
10
THE GAYDAR
80
STARS
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
TRENDS
REVIEWS
11 OUT IN FRONT
Meet the community leaders
who are doing us proud. By
Sheryl Kay
24 MUSIC
Always at the top of our play
lists, Melissa Etheridge. By
Kelly McCartney
11 IN CASE YOU MISSED
IT ... LGBT news from across
the country. By OutNews
Global
27 FILMS
Meet Katherine Barrell, the
LGBTally star of hit series
Wynonna Earp. By Dana Piccoli
12 WOMEN WE LOVE
Each issue we pick a lucky lady
with a look and a life to match.
30 BOOKS
From pioneering LGBT icons,
to Hollywood lesbians, to lavender love in the White House.
Feast on history this issue!
13 LESBOFILE
What's new and noteworthy
with our favorite celesbians.
By Jocelyn Voo
VIEWS
16 POLITICS
Deep thoughts and heartfelt
convictions on a different topic
each issue from our contributing politics editor. By Victoria
A. Brownworth
18 ISSUES
Our in-depth look into a hot
button topic affecting queer
women worldwide.
4
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
32 SHORT STORY
Relish this excerpt from the
novel Charity. By Paulette
Callen
36 SEX
Meet one of the great minds
behind high quality lesbian
and queer girl erotica By Yana
Tallon-Hicks
LAST LOOK
78 CROSSWORD
Can you tame our Queer Quiz?
By Myles Mellor
00
I,
'-'
• ';1#
'
~
,
r.,
.... t
YOUCANHELPTHEM
DONATENOW
IFAW.ORG/CURVE
QIFAW
International Fund for Animal Welfare
RONTtCURVETTES
DR.FRANKIEBASHAN
Dr. Frankie Bashan is an LGBT relationships specialist.
After nine years of clinical experience, Dr. Frankie sought
a less formal and more dynamic setting and followed her
passion for connecting people and bringing happiness
into their lives by becoming a professional matchmaker.
Little Gay Book (littlegaybook.com) is the premier
lesbian matchmaking service in the San Francisco Bay
Area, Los Angeles, New York and Hawaii. This issue on
page 20 she provides advice on how to find lasting love.
(drfrankie.com)
curve
THE BEST-SELLING
FEB/MAR
LESBIAN
2017 » VOLUME
MAGAZINE
27 NUMBER
1
PUBLISHER Silke Bader
FOUNDING PUBLISHER Frances Stevens
EDITORIAL
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Merryn Johns
SENIORCOPY EDITOR Katherine Wright
CONTRIBUTINGEDITORS Marcie Bianco, Victoria A.
Brownworth, Lyndsey D'Arcangelo, Anita Dolce Vita,
Sheryl Kay, Gillian Kendall, Dave Steinfeld,
Jocelyn Voo
EDITORIALASSISTANTSAnnalese Davis
OPERATIONS
DIRECTOROF OPERATIONS Jeannie Sotheran
PROOFING
FINBARRTOESLAND
PROOFREADERMarcie Bianco
Finbarr Toesland is a London-based journalist who
specializes in business, technology and economic issues,
with a focus on Africa. Finbarr's work has been published
in Financial Times' publications, The Times of London,
The Huffington Post, Africa Report, The European and
World Politics Review. In this issue, on page 18, Finbarr
looks at the progress of LGBT rights in Nigeria and the
difficulties queer women and lesbians face living openly
in often hostile environments. Follow Finbarr on Twitter
@FinbarrToesland
ADVERTISING
NATIONALSALES Rivendell Media (908) 232-2021
EMAIL todd@curvemagazine.com
ART/PRODUCTION
ART DIRECTOR Bruno Cesar Guimaraes
SOCIAL MEDIA
MANAGERAnnalese
Davis
CONTRIBUTING WRITERS
Melany Joy Beck, Victoria Bond, Kelsy Chauvin, Jane
Czyzselska, Mallorie DeRiggi, Dar Dowling, Jill Goldstein,
Kristin Flickinger, Sarah Hasu, Kim Hoffman, Alanna
J. Higginson, Francesca Lewis, Charlene Lichtenstein,
Sassafras Lowrey, Kelly McCartney, Myles Mellor, Laurie
K. Schenden, Janelle Sorenson, Yana Tallon-Hicks, Lisa
Tedesco, Sarah Toce
CONTRIBUTING ILLUSTRATORS & PHOTOGRAPHERS
Steph Brusig, Erica Camille, Grace Chu, Meagan Cignoli,
Sara Lautman, Syd London, Maggie Parker, Diana Price, B.
Proud, Robin Roemer, Leslie Van Stelten
PAULETTECALLEN
Paulette Callen's poems, articles, and short stories have
appeared in small journals, magazines, and anthologies.
For nearly four years, she served as a volunteer staff
member for POWARS(Pet Owners with AIDS Resource
Services) in New York City. After many years as a resident
of Manhattan's Upper West Side she returned, with her
rescued blind Shih Tzu, Lily, to her hometown in South
Dakota, which is where Charity, the first of her four
published novels, is set. Read an excerpt on page 32.
(paulettecallen.com)
GILLIANKENDALL
Gillian Kendall has been writing for Curve since its earliest
days. She is a full-time writer and writing coach, living in
Florida. Her first book, the co-authored How I Became a
Human Being, was the subject of the Oscar-nominated
film, The Sessions. Her second book, Mr. Ding's Chicken
Feet, was a New York Times Notable Book, but filmmakers
stayed away in droves. Currently she's re-revising an
unlikely memoir, Notes from the Stranger's Corridor: A
story of editing, insomnia, and minor mental illness, and
seeking artistic representation like mad. (gilliankendall.org)
CONTACT INFO
Curve Magazine
PO Box 467
New York, NY 10034
PHONE (415) 871-0569
SUBSCRIPTIONINQUIRIES(800)
705-0070 (toll-free in usonly)
ADVERTISINGEMAIL todd@curvemagazine.com
EDITORIALEMAIL editor@curvemag.com
LETTERSTO THE EDITOREMAIL letters@curvemagazine.com
Volume 27 Issue 1 Curve (ISSN 1087-867X) is published 6 times
per year (January/February, March/April, May/June, July/August,
September/October, November/December) by Avalon Media, LLC,
PO Box 467, New York NY 10034. Subscription price: $35/year, $45
Canadian (U.S. funds only) and $55 international (U.S. funds only).
Returned checks will be assessed a $25 surcharge. Periodicals
postage paid at San Francisco, CA 94114 and at additional mailing
offices (USPS 0010-355). Contents of Curve Magazine may not
be reproduced in any manner, either whole or in part, without
written permission from the publisher. Publication of the name or
photograph of any persons or organizations appearing, advertising
or listing in Curve may not be taken as an indication of the sexual
orientation of that individual or group unless specifically stated.
Curve welcomes letters, queries, unsolicited manuscripts and
artwork. Include SASE for response. Lack of any representation
only signifies insufficient materials. Submissions cannot be
returned unless a self-addressed stamped envelope is included.
No responsibility is assumed for loss or damages. The contents
do not necessarily represent the opinions of the editor, unless
specifically stated. All magazines sent discreetly. Subscription
Inquiries: Please write to Curve, Avalon Media LLC., PO Box 467 New
York NY 10034, email jeannie@curvemag.com Canadian Agreement
Number: 40793029. Postmaster: Send address changes to jeannie@
curvemag.com, Curve, PO Box 17138,N. Hollywood, CA 91615-7138.
Printed in the U.S.
curvemag.com
6
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
WHEN
YOU'RE
IN
LAS
VEGAS,
YOU'RE
ALWAYS
TREATED
WELL.
ESPECIALLY
WHENYOUTREAT
YOURSELF
As one of the top destinations
WHEN
YOU'RE
FEELING
night
you're
out
options
your
including
LOOKING
GOOD,
everything
YOU'RE
best.
the Fashion
Visit
In between
and your
around
the world
up the perfect
gift,
Las Vegas
The Forum
Shops
at Caesars
boasts
stores
and restaurants.
FOR YOUR
TASTEBUDS.
all the
partner
fun
that
are going
hot
Restaurant
spots,
course,
of your trip.
your
inside
meals
Paris Las Vegas
to
you're
here
to take
has numerous
or rejuvenate.
There
like Glow
AND
READY
TO
NIGHT.
it easy
world-class
are over
at Tropicana
or do anything
45 luxurious
spas to choose
or ESPA at Vdara
out
Regardless
of how you choose
stores
of options
to keep you refreshed
but,
spas to help you relax
Las Vegas.
to do Vegas, there
and feeling
are plenty
like you could
do it all over again.
THE
has to
to eat.
From amazing
or check
Whether
from,
REJUVENATED
ON ANOTHER
Las Vegas
has countless
seven anchor
Las Vegas
to want
are sure
for a romantic
and keep you looking
Las Vegas can be one of the most romantic
experiences
Tower
REFRESHED,
is all in Las Vegas.
outfit
your inner shopaholic
Show Las Vegas that
and 250 specialty
A TREAT
from
picking
you need to have a great
need to look and feel your best.
TAKE
or an unexpected
to satisfy
Las Vegas has everything
you could
GOOD.
The best shopping
Whether
for LGBT travelers,
time,
offer,
And
you
dining
in
and unforgettable
Strip
views
and,
The nightlife
for every
IS A LIFESTYLE
There's
you're
ALL
ITS OWN.
in Las Vegas is like no other, with amazing
taste,
from
hip bars like Beauty
Las Vegas to LAX at Luxor - a booming,
at Eiffel
to new Downtown
be memorable
NIGHTLIFE
a party
to be found
sure to have a good
every
multilevel
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time whenever
venues
Bar in Downtown
ultra lounge.
day of the year, so
you visit.
of
delicious.
NOMATTER
HOWYOUSPENDYOURTIMEIN VEGASTHERE'S
FINALLY
A GETAWAY
THATGETSYOU
Visit
LasVegas.com
to book flights,
hotels,
vacation
packages
and more.
RONT /
FEEDBACK
thanks for putting her on the
cover of Curve anyway. I hope
to read more about her in
future issues.
-Mallory Evans, via email
KRISTENSTEWARTKILLS
I couldn't believe my eyes
when I saw last issue and
the story on Kristen Stewart
["Becoming Kristen," V.26#6].
I'm a lifelong Kristen Stewart
fan and I loved your story with
her but seriously, you could
do a whole issue on her. From
Kristen news, to the books she
reads, to the music she listens
to and the places she travels to
for film work, to the awesome
clothes she wears. And all the
movies she's made. There's
been 45 already! Kristen is
everything, all the time! But
THANKS FORTHE MEMORIES
2016, YOU SUCKED
For un unbelievably shitty year,
I really enjoyed the roundup
of 2016 in your Politics
column ["The Year of Living
Tumultuously, V.26#6]. I was
never a huge political person,
but this article put everything
in perspective for me in terms
of events impacting women,
queers, and how a huge
opportunity slipped through
our fingers this year. Yes, there
were high points, but boy did
we lose a lot: people, values ...
and hate won. Already people
have forgotten Pulse, Syria,
and the need for women's
rights. I'm truly afraid for where
this country is headed but I
hope I'll always have Curve to
keep me informed.
-Cathy Rhodes, Hudson, N.Y.
MikePenceWantsTo
TurnYouStraight by
VictoriaA. Brownworth
on curvemag.com
I still cannot understand
why these peopleareso
concernedwith what goes
on 1nthe bedroomsof other
people I don t sit around
wonderingwhat they do
why do they carewhat I
might do Who 1sreallythe
sick personhere?Actually,I
don t evenwonder what
other gay peopledo 1ntheir
bedroom - PamFannon
Fuckall the dumbass
poht1ctans
and their bullshit
LGBTbusiness1sNOT
for poht1c1ans1
Theyhave
NO RIGHTto womens
reproductiveorgans or
anyonessexualonentat1on1
Whatthey DO needto worry
about 1sf1x1ng
this fucked
up country,and all those
1ssues1
- Nessa Campbell
MARRIAGE EQUALITY AND QUEER WOMEN STUDY
Has marriage equality and
the US Presidential election
affected you? We are a team
of university researchers
who want to learn about
how marriage equality and
the election have affected
you and your relationships. If
you are interested, visit
http://bit.ly/2gExC6f to
take our survey or email
studyonma rriage.eq ua Iity@
gmail.com for more
information on our study.
li•i!■:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::=··
WHAT
ISYOUR
REACTION
TOTHE
RESULTS
OFTHE
ELECTION?
44%
HILLARY WAS ROBBED! #NOTMYPRESIDENT
48%
IT FELT LIKE SOMEONE HAD DIED. A SAD DAY FOR LGBT AMERICANS
8%
I VOTED FOR TRUMP, GIVE HIM A CHANCE!
0%
I DON'T CARE, IT WON'T MAKE A DIFFERENCE TO MY LIFE
Send to:
WRITE
Curve
USI
magazine, PO Box 467, New York, NY 10034
Email: letters@curvemagazine.com
8
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
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curvemag.com/magazine
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GIRL GAYDAR
CELESBIANGOSSIP
1 SHE SAID WHAT?
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
9
TRENDS/
THE GAYDAR
Supergirl's Alex Danvers (Chyler
Leigh) reveals that her adopted
sister Kara isn't the only one with
a secret identity ...
Debi Mazar's continuing role
on Younger as an Orthodox
lesbian Jew, Maggie. Hat tip to
you, Debi, for keeping it real
A lesbian YouTuber
shows her vagina to a
gay male friend who
has never seen one
before, and films his
reaction
Fake news sites claiming
lvanka Trump is actually
a lesbian. Get outta town,
we don't want her I
Pornhub.com
publishes data
suggesting
that straight
female users
are 186 percent
more likely
to search for
"lesbian" porn
than men
What a TrumpPence presidency
will mean for
LGBT Americans:
conversion
therapy is just the
beginning ....
Desert
Hearts, the
first lesbian
movie to
have a happy
ending turns
30
l
Veronicas singer Jess
Origliasso makes a
passionate plea for
the Safe Schools antibullying program in
Australia
Lesbian Pizzal Lesbian-owned
Pizzeria Paradiso in D.C.is sharing
25th anniversary specials and a
warm place for LGBTs
10
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
Bachelor
Australia
contestants
Megan and
Tiffany keep
their romance
secret for 5
months before
going public.
How'sthat'
The New York Post
"for clicks" video about
NYC Sirens lesbian
motorcycle club that
delivers donor breast
milk to babies who
need it. Go, Sirens!
Taiwan's first female head of state
supports marriage equality and MPs are
working on three same-sex marriage
bills, one of which could be passed soon
TRENDS/
NE
MARIA GIRALT
>>Spain
Problem Solver
When there's a need, Maria Giralt finds a way. In fact,
she doesn't just discover a solution-she
creates it.
In the late 1970s, Giralt, a native Catalan from
Barcelona, met up with her first group of gay men, but
there were no groups for women in Spain at that time,
so Giralt decided to start her own. The Collective de
Lesbianas provided a safe place for gay women to socialize, discuss political struggles, and escape from the verbal
abuse they often encountered just by walking down the
street. While Gira It says the women were sometimes
physically attacked as well, they fought back.
"Normally, we'd win;' she says with a smile. "And then
we run, really really fast."
About eight years ago, she was considering the lack
THE
SAN
ANTONIO
FOUR,
WHO
IN1997WERE
WRONGLY
CONVICTED
OF
SEXUALLY
MOLESTING
GIRLS
aged 7 and 9, were exonerated one day before Thanksg1v1ng
2016. Elizabeth Ramirez, Kristie Mayhugh, Cassandra Rivera
and Anna Vasquez, who were the subject of the documentary
"Southwest of Salem," were declared innocent by the Texas
Court of Criminal Appeals after a long process of trying to clear
their names and records. "These defendants have won the right
to proclaim to the cItIzens of Texas that they did not commit a
crime," ruled Judge David Newell. "These women have carried
that burden. They are innocent. And they are exonerated."
of fashion in intimate apparel created specifically for
lesbians, and once again decided she'd solve the problem
on her own. "This was my way of saying ... we exist!" she
• MARIELA
CASTRO
LEADS
LGBT
explains. So she got together with artists Elisabeth Sabala
Cuba after decades of
persecution, and following the
death of Fidel Castro, Cuba's
LGBTcommunity finds renewed
inspiration in her, the charismatic
daughter of President Raul
Castro and a member of Cuba's
National Assembly. She uses
her passion and pedigree to
promote acceptance in the face
of prejudice and was the subject
of a recent HBO documentary,
Castro is expected to continue
to spread a message of equality
across the country in 2017.
and Valerie Prot and designed her own line of women's
underwear, in femme and butch versions imbued with
desire and sensuality. Inspired by the innovative fashion
show called Bread and Butter, Gira It borrowed the
slang Spanish word for lesbian, bollera, and named her
company Bolla and Butter. Today, not only does she sell
several styles of the lingerie, she also offers fun items like
feather-lined handcuffs, bath foam, candles, and more
(bolloandbuttershop.com).
It would have been easy for
Gira It to stop there, but a few years ago she began to
notice the lack of LGBTQ programming on Spanish TV.
And so, once again, she answered the call and founded
Gayles.TV,a robust on line channel offering an exciting
array of content-from
entertainment to health topics to
politics and more (and yes, you can click the option for
English subtitles).
Spain is a unique country when it comes to gay rights,
Gira It says. It was the first predominantly Catholic country
to permit gay marriage, and since 2013 there is legislation
on the books forbidding homophobia in employment
• ZALES
JEWELERS
CAME
UNDER
attack from right-wing group One
Million Moms for a 30-second
TV commercial depicting lesbian
brides among other happy
couples celebrating their love
with diamonds. According to the
group, the discount diamond
dealers are "glorifying sin" and
should pull the ad from TV.
and housing. But life is not perfect. "Prejudice here is
subtle," notes Giralt. "We may have laws, but society has
not changed its mentality, especially when it comes to
misogyny, sexism, transgender or even immigrant rights.
OUTNEWS
GLOBAL
• SHANIQUE
SANDERS,
WHO
WAS
a 23-year-old black lesbian
"stud" was found lying in
the street in Pittsburgh on
November 30. She had at
least one gunshot wound
and was pronounced dead at
hospital. Police are looking for
five suspects who were seen
fleeing the scene. Pghlesbian,
Pittsburgh's LGBTblog,
interviewed local LGBTactivist
Amber Sloan who was a friend
and mentor to Shanique. Sloan
said there's a lack of resources
and support for young studs
in Pittsburgh and has noticed
recent increased violence
against queer women of color.
• ASOUTH
AFRICAN
LESBIAN
was assaulted, abducted from
her home near Cape Town
in December and shot dead.
More than 55 percent of LGBT
South Africans fear they will
experience discrimination or
violence according to a report
released by Love Not Hate
Campaign.
The fight is not only for lesbian rights, but for all people
who are oppressed:' - By Sheryl Kay
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
11
TRENDS/
GOSBIp
LESBOFILE
IT'S MOSTLY ABOUT COMING OUT, LOUDLY AND PROUDLY.
BY JOCELYN VOO
• SOMETHING TO SCREAM ABOUT
Sometimes there's drama when a celeb comes out, and sometimes it's said in 140 characters
or less. Scream star Bex Taylor-Klaus, who has played several queer characters in her career,
and had also previously denied being a lesbian in a 2013 Facebook post, finally chose to
tweet, "hello my name is bex and yes the rumors are true I am v gay" right before a YouNow
livestream chat with fans. The reason for her declaration? The 2016 election. "Part of why I'm
coming out is because there's so much hate and fear in and around the LGBT community
right now and it's important for us not to halt progress out of fear," she said in her livestream.
In light of so many expressions of hate, what better reason than to share love?
• THIS IS MUSIC TO OUR EARS
Another woman to stand up and come out due to the election: girl group Fifth Harmony's
Lauren Jauregui. But unlike Taylor-Klaus's revelation, Jauregui's was a little more verbose.
The singer posted a letter on Billboard.com lambasting Trump supporters, calling them
racist, sexist, xenophobic and hypocritical-and those are among the nicer things she said.
She also stated how she is proud to be a bisexual Cuban-American woman. "I am grateful
and will continue to speak on behalf of the women around the world and in our very own
country who do not experience a fraction of that respect because of the color of their skin
or what they choose to wear, or how their hair looks, or how much makeup they have on or
any other absurdity that we women are reduced to," she wrote. Preach!
• THERE'S ONE IN EVERY FAMILY?
The Duggar family isn't unfamiliar with fame-or infamy. The giant family starred in 19 Kids
& Counting for seven years until its discontinuation in 2015 when it was revealed that the
eldest son, Josh, had molested five girls, including his younger sisters. But now the rumor
mill has its eyes on Jana Duggar, the eldest daughter, who also happens to be the only girl
who's single. Fans have expressed their concern at the lack of romance in her life. Could
she be lesbian? Earlier this year Duggar explained, "There have been different guys come
along and ask but they haven't been, I don't know, the right one. I'm not just out to get
married to the first one that comes along." Even with no evidence, there's whispers that
maybe, just maybe, she's one of us. Guess we'll wait and see.
• AMAZING ABBY, HOW SWEET THE SOUND
Now seems like the time when we could use a little love. Christian mom blogger and
author Glennon Doyle Melton, who recently divorced her husband of 14 years, revealed
that she's dating FIFA World Cup champion Abby Wambach, who at the time was only
two months separated from her wife Sarah Huffman. At press time all seems well. "What I
need you to know-and what I know you need to know-is that I am deeply, finally, FINE,"
Melton wrote on Facebook. "Fine through my bones and soul and mind and just every
fiber of me ... l have officially become a woman who knows who she is and refuses to
betray herself. So anyway. What I'm trying to say is. PRECIOUSWORLD: I LOVE ABBY.I'm
so happy. Love Wins." Full stop.
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
13
TRENDS/SHE
SAID
"The
devastating
results hit the LGBT
community particularly hard
because we are unique in spanning
all the demographic groups targeted
by the president-elect throughout his
campaign. We are Latino, Black, women,
Muslims, undocumented and we have
d isabi Iities."
-Aisha C. Moodie-Mills for
victoryfund.org
"By a slim
margin, this nation
has elected a demagogue
who trafficked in bigotry, stoked
racist hatred and normalized
misogyny ...We are about to be tested
as never before, and speaking for
myself, and NCLR, we will not stand
down, sit idle or be silent in the face
of oppression, bullying or threat."
-Kate Kendell for NCLR
14
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
16 HISTORYWITHOUT HILLARY
18 OUR SISTERSIN NIGERIA
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
15
History De/erred
What the defeat of Hillary Clinton means for women, and for history.
BY VICTORIA
A. BROWNWORTH
A few days before Thanksgiving, Hillary
Clinton was in a bookstore in Rhode Island
with her family. The bookseller, Jessica
Wick, took a selfie with Hillary and then
posted a message on Facebook:
"I wasn't as eloquent as I'd have liked to be.
I didn't want to take her & her family out
of their day together. I also didn't want to
cry; I feel like strangers crying at one might
detract from one's day. I'd have liked to tell
her I was a poet in ardent support of what
she stood and stands for. I'd have liked to
tell her how, at that very bookstore, behind
the very same counter she approached
to ask about a book, I listened to her
concession speech with two of my coworkers and we cried; how in that same
spot customers and employees have
talked about her with regret and hope.
I'd have liked to tell her something which
encompasses the sadness I feel that she
did not win, but somehow tell her that in a
16
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
way which didn't rub salt in any wounds. I'd
have liked to give her something."
Wick did speak eloquently. Her words
articulated what so many women were
thinking and feeling in the days and weeks
following the biggest political upset in
American presidential history.
I began covering the presidential
campaign in April 2015, when Hillary Clinton
became the first Democrat and Sen. Ted
Cruz (R-TX)became the first Republican to
announce their presidential candidacies.
As this magazine's senior political editor,
I wrote at least one column a week about
the campaign, in addition to the pieces I
wrote for other newspapers. Between April
2015 and November 2016, I wrote several
hundred columns and nearly 50,000
tweets about the election. I watched every
debate and town hall for both Democrats
and Republicans and watched events with
third-party candidates Gary Johnson and
Jill Stein. I watched every minute of the
Republican National Convention on TV
and I attended the Democratic National
Convention, reporting and live-tweeting
daily.
For 19 months, I lived and breathed
the election. During most of the primary
season, I was still standing on the sidelines,
attempting neutrality: There were things I
liked about Bernie Sanders; there were
things I didn't like about Hillary.
But when the primaries ended and
Sanders refused to concede, despite a
deficit of 4 million votes, 1,000 delegates,
and 11contests, I ceased to be any kind of
bystander. I've covered elections for more
than two decades.
I've been a feminist since the day I stood
up to a nun in grade school and told her
women should be able to be priests, too.
I know the damage men who don't get
their way can do to women, no matter
how accomplished the women and how
VIEWS/
mediocre the men. When Hillary began
homing in on the GOP, Sanders was still
lashing out at Democrats. And her.
I began to worry then about the general
election, but the part of me with hope, the
part of me that had borne witness to Hillary
Clinton's remarkable passage and growth
through American politics over the past
40 years, remained stalwart: Of course
she would win the presidency. During my
lifetime, no one had worked harder for
it, and no one was more qualified for the
position. First Lady Michelle Obama gave
stirring speeches about "our friend Hillary:'
Everyone I knew was a Hillary supporter. A
Trump presidency seemed inconceivable.
The photos said it all on election night
and the morning after: pictures of women
of all races, ages, and ethnicities crying,
hugging one another, all in stunned
disbelief. After nearly two years of one
of the most grueling and vituperative
presidential election cycles in modern
times, it was over. Hillary Clinton had
lost the Electoral College vote to Donald
Trump.
We were dumbstruck and gobsmacked
and gutted.
How could this brilliant, hard-working,
savvy, compassionate, beautiful champion
for our rights-as women, as LGBTs, as
immigrants; as the disabled, the poor, the
working poor, the middle class; as whites,
blacks, Latinas, Asians, Native Americansnot be our president-elect? How could
a woman who spends her free time in
bookstores be supplanted by a man who
brags he doesn't read because he "doesn't
have to"?
Over the ensuing weeks, Hillary's vote
lead grew. At press time, she was more than
2.7 million votes ahead of Donald Trump,
the president-elect. At Thanksgiving,
computer scientists and political pollsters
of long standing began to cite problems
with the vote count in three states:
Wisconsin, Michigan, Pennsylvania. There
was pressure to audit the vote, pressure
on the long-outmoded, slavery-protecting,
18th-century anachronism of the Electoral
College that never envisioned the day
when 81 percent of Americans would be
living in cities and people of color would
comprise a third of the voting populacewomen more than half.
I sobbed in the days after the election.
During Hillary's concession speech I was
crying out loud, mourning for all I saw lost
in that speech. I felt as if my heart would
break. I shall never comprehend how
Hillary stood there dry-eyed, her voice
strong and unwavering, as she delivered
the most terrible words of her 40-year
political career. It showed her as the
stateswoman that she was born to be. That
she worked to be. That she will now never
be.
My wife doesn't cry. She gets angry.
For days she stormed around our house
ranting about the demographics of the
vote, as they became known.
We live in a black neighborhood in a
majority-POC city. We are the token white
people in our own lives. So everyone
we know voted for Hillary. And the
demographics showed it.
A full 94 percent of black women
voted for Hillary, 68 percent of Latinas, 69
percent of millennials. But only 43 percent
of white women.
I had known all along that GOP
women wouldn't vote for Hillary. But that
Democrats-progressives-would
vote for
Trump? That I never imagined. Nor did the
pollsters.
Black women were furious. White
women had sold them out for white
privilege. I spoke to women who voted
for Trump, including some lesbians. It
was disheartening. They were concerned
about about ISIS, about having their guns
taken away. They thought Hillary was
dishonest. They thought she was a baby
killer who would agree to abortions on the
last day of gestation. They thought she
might be a lesbian involved with a Muslim
spy-her aide of 20 years, Huma Abedin.
We heard about fake news and how the
majority of those stories targeted Hillary.
We wondered why the press and Google,
Facebook and Twitter, told us after the
election.
There has not been a day since the
election that I have not ached for what was
lost. Our first female president. The only
competent candidate. Watching Trump
roll out his cabinet picks-every one of
them racist, misogynist, anti-LGBT-was
infuriating and terrifying in equal measure.
Clinton had promised a 50 percent female,
40 percent non-white cabinet, reflecting
her own staff, reflecting America. We shall
never have that.
I'm in my 50s. So is my wife. So are most
of our closest friends. It is unlikely we will
see a woman president in our lifetime.
POLITI
Other women may run, but they won't
have Clinton's expertise or the ability to
withstand relentless misogyny. It took 240
years for America to nominate a woman on
a major-party ticket. In every poll, she was
expected to win. But when many peoplemost of them white (a mere 31 percent
of white men voted for Clinton)-got into
the voting booth, their fear overtook their
sense.
Why women vote against themselves
and one another has been studied: Women
distrust women in power because there
are so few role models, and they don't
recognize women as capable of leading.
There is an element of jealousy. There is an
element of internalized misogyny. Of selfloathing.
Black women were able to set those
things aside. Why weren't white women?
Why weren't white lesbians? How could
any woman vote for a self-declared sexual
predator when each of us knows at least
one woman, if not ourselves, who has
been the victim of sexual assault? How
could any woman vote for a man whose
main campaign theme was racism and
hate? Whose vice presidential pick funded
conversion therapy for LGBTsand passed a
law in Indiana, when he was the governor,
that women had to hold funerals for their
aborted fetuses?
I will likely not live to see a woman
president. Hillary Clinton was the most
qualified woman we had to offer. And after
working her way up the political ladder for
40 years, she was challenged by two men
with incredibly slender resumes. Who will
take her place? Elizabeth Warren, who
is the same age as Clinton but has only
been in political office for six years and
was a Republican until 2000? Gov. Nikki
Haley (R-SC), who is 25 years younger
than Warren and may become Trump's UN
ambassador? She is a woman of color but
has far-right-wing views. Kamala Harris,
the former attorney general of California,
newly elected to the Senate in 2016? She
mirrors Hillary in many ways but is 15 years
younger and black.
We can't know who will rise. We do
know that it took Hillary Clinton 40 years of
being outspoken-making waves, making
history, making change-to get close. We
know that there will always be women who
fear other women in power more than they
fear men. We know that in 2016 history was
deferred. We do not know for how long.•
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
17
i -:.
..,
1\~, \\
' ...~a-''-'--'-...-<.&..1
Moving
IOwards
LGB1
Righlsin
Nigeria
1
7
Activists in the African
nation struggle for equality
against a tide of violence.
BY FINBARR TOESLAND
18
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
__
......._______
~---
Not a week goes by without a news
report detailing yet another vicious attack
on members of Africa's LGBT population.
These hate crimes are not confined to just
a few African countries but can be found
across the continent, even in progressive
South Africa.
Although in 2006 South Africa became
the first, and to this day is the only, African
nation to legalize same-sex marriage,
so-called corrective rapes have become
prevalent. Rapes and other violent crimes
are not uncommon in South Africa,
however, corrective rapes specifically
target lesbians in an attempt to change their
sexuality; the attackers believe victims will
be "fixed" by the rape and become straight.
Gangs of men usually commit these crimes
and often transmit AIDS and other diseases.
But lesbians who live in Johannesburg's
affluent Sandton neighborhood will have a
drastically different experience from those
who inhabit one of Cape Town's townships.
Lesbians in poorer South African townships
bear the brunt of these assaults and then
are left to fend for themselves due to the
lack of police-or to the prejudice they face
when reporting their injuries.
Recently, the West African nation of
Nigeria overtook South Africa to become
the largest economy on the continent.
Nigeria has become a major economic
power: But this rapid financial development
has not been matched by progress toward
social equity for the LGBT community.
Being out and open in Nigeria is extremely
difficult due to the many social, political,
and economic barriers, but courageous
lesbian organizations that aim to address
sexual and reproductive health concerns
are emerging in the country.
Akudo Oguaghamba, executive director
of the Women's Health and Equal Rights
Initiative (WHER), is at the forefront of
the call for equal rights for Nigeria's
LGBT citizens. "In the wake of the antihomosexuality crusade, there have been
a lot of push-backs in advocacy efforts.
VIEWS/
These negative reactions also toughened
up LGBT activists in these areas, as our
worst fears became reality and we are left
with no other choice than to be strong and
determined;' explains Oguaghamba.
"In Nigeria, after the Same Sex Marriage
Prohibition Act was enacted, a great deal of
awareness was raised around LGBT rights
and what it means to be a homosexual. We
have continued to educate the Nigerian
people carefully to understand that we are
humans too and deserve to reach our full
potential, regardless of sexual orientation
and gender identity."
While the LGBT rights movement over
the past few decades has achieved a great
deal of success in Western countries, the
same cannot be said in Africa. There is no
simple answer as to why gay rights in Africa
have been so hard to attain, but the roots of
modern-day homophobia in many African
countries can be traced back to the impact
of colonialism. Many of the 19th century
British anti-sodomy laws were exported
to the African countries that were part of
the then British Empire, leaving a legacy
of homophobia that has been difficult to
erase.
Zimbabwe's controversial president,
Robert Mugabe, has scapegoated gays and
lesbiansfor a range of problems the country
is dealing with, has called homosexuality
"un-African," and has even claimed that
colonists brought over this "immoral
culture:' Of course, homosexuality is far
from a colonial import and there is evidence
dating back thousands of years showing
that in Africa, as in anywhere else in the
world, homosexuality is an intrinsic part of
human history. For example, ancient cave
paintings by the San people of Zimbabwe
depict homosexuality, and Sudan's Zande
tribe saw lesbianism practiced.
Comments like those made by Mugabe
sound outrageous and unbelievable,
but unfortunately these views are widely
held. A poll conducted by NOIPolls in
partnership with The Initiative for Equal
Rights (TIERs)and the Bisi Alimi Foundation
in 2015 discovered that anti-gay sentiment
in Nigeria is very high. One of the most
disturbing findings was that 90 percent
of Nigerians agreed with the statement
"Nigeria would be a better country without
homosexuals" and 87 percent had the
opinion that "homosexuals should be
imprisoned for 14 years for having a same-
sex relationship or living together:'
Nigeria's economic ascent, paired with
stunning natural scenery, has made the
country a promising travel destination.
Nevertheless, lesbophobia is still a major
concern for visitors traveling to Nigeria and
has the potential to deter members of the
LGBT community from experiencing this
diverse nation.
"Because same-sex marriage, samesex relationships, and LGBT organizing
are criminalized in Nigeria, it is important
for lesbians traveling through Nigeria to
refrain from indulging in activities that
will publicly brand them as lesbians;' says
Oguaghamba. In some parts of Africa, the
situation might be anecdotally different,
but the lived experiences end up being
the same. I would advise that any lesbian
traveling to any country in Africa consult
the people on the ground to understand
their context and also to have support on
the ground."
Rather than endorsing LGBT rights,
Nigeria's president, Goodluck Jonathan,
recently signed the Same-Sex Marriage
Prohibition Bill, which represents a
considerable setback. This draconian
piece of legislation not only outlaws samesex marriage but also makes it a criminal
offense for same-sex couples to publicly
display affection and to carry out LGBT
advocacy. Some countries, including
the United Kingdom, have threatened
to cut aid to countries that actively
discriminate against gay people. However,
proclamations by Western nations calling
for gay rights further propagate the widely
held notion that homosexuality is a Western
import.
President Barack Obama's vocal
support for LGBT rights on his 2015 visit
to Kenya and Ethiopia also generated
a defensive reaction from those on the
continent who believe that the US is
attempting to impose its cultural values
on Africa.
"Change has to come from within
African societies and be led by Africans.
This is why it is so important to publicize,
support, and empower African LGBT
activists. Training for African journalists
in LGBT issues would help reduce media
homophobia, which often stirs hate and
violence," says Peter Tatchell, a human
rights campaigner and the director of
the Peter Tatchell Foundation. "Churches
ISS
also need to speak out against the
victimization of LGBT people, which is
often driven by religiously motivated
prejudice."
Africans themselves are the only ones
able to reverse anti-gay laws and change
public opinion; however, this battle
for basic rights is monumental. It is
extraordinarily difficult for African LGBT
activists to openly campaign for equal
rights, as they are being targeted and
their cause is being sensationalized by
the media and homophobic mobs.
The Ugandan weekly tabloid Rolling
Stone published photographs of 100 gay
Ugandans in 2010, under the headline
"Hang Them." One of the people named
in the article and pictured on the front
page was David Kato, a prominent
human rights activist who had received
a number of death threats before the
report was published. A few months
after being named, Kato was beaten to
death with a hammer in his home.
Clearly, this environment discourages
many Africans from speaking out in
favor of LGBT rights, and the situation is
deteriorating. "In most African countries,
anti-LGBT attitudes have worsened, and
in Nigeria, Gambia, Cameroon, and
Uganda, legal repression has intensified.
This has hit all LGBT people, but lesbians
have suffered particularly badly by being
subjected to the brutality of corrective
rape," says Tatchell. "There is much
ignorance, fear, and hate toward lesbians
in Africa. Men feel especially threatened
by lesbian [and straight] women who
have broken away from the shackles of
often patriarchal traditional cultures."
At the moment,
it may seem
impossible to overcome such pervasive
problems and for gays and lesbians
to live openly and freely, but the will
of LGBT people in Africa remains
strong. "There is hope-we have seen
tremendous organizing and coming out
by gay and lesbian people in countries
where even such deplorable conditions
exist, such as Egypt and Ethiopia. There
is strong organizing in East and Southern
Africa, which is a strong beacon that selforganizing, self-determination
by gay
and lesbian Africans may indeed change
the tide," concludes Denis Nzioka, a
leading sexual and gender minorities
activist based in Kenya.•
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
19
ADVICE»
L
The
_Dating
Decode
You can find your perfect
match with this simple advice
BY DR. FRANKIE BASHAN
20
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
et's face it. Single lesbians
are terrible at dating.
As a professional lesbian
matchmaker, I've worked
with hundreds of women who are
seeking The One, and I've heard their
idea of a perfect mate described to me
again and again: "My perfect match has
a great sense of humor; likes adventure,
travel, and fun; but is also down to
earth. She's reasonably fit, emotionally
intelligent, and financially secure.
She's supportive but independent,
responsible but spontaneous, and is
open to a healthy, loving, long-term
relationship."
Great! But then I'm immediately
asked, "Where is she? Does she even
exist? Am I asking too much?" The
good news is, the woman you want to
meet is out there waiting to meet you.
So why haven't you found her yet?
Many of us are conditioned to believe
that with no effort on our part (or very little),
our life partners will just fall into our laps.
Any sort of "plan" to find a partner feels
contrived, transactional, and decidedly
unromantic. We passively leave the biggest
part of our happiness to chemistry, chance,
and the universe, while we concentrate on
our jobs, our routines, and everything that's
comfortable and keeps us occupied.
In 2009, when I started my lesbian dating
service, the Little Gay Book, I listened to
women express the same dating struggles:
They're too busy; they're uncertain as to
where the women are; their type of woman
is impossible to find; they have no idea how
to date successfully; they believe all other
lesbians have baggage, and so on. I saw a
significant need for a system to help women
meet one another, maybe get out of their
comfort zones and actually connect faceto-face. Through my experience working
VIEWS/
with single lesbians, I've learned the most
common dating problems among them.
Dating is a numbers game. It takes
seven dates with seven different women
to meet one you actually connect with.
That's right. Seven. If you're serious about
finding Her, dating requires making time
in your schedule for dinners, coffees, and
drinks with strangers, so that you can
begin to find out who they really are. If
every hour of every day is filled with work
or other obligations, you're not going to
have the time (or the energy) to truly focus
on getting to know another individual. And
isn't that what you expect from someone
who is going on a date with YOU?
Dating is not U-Hauling. The polar
opposite of the woman who has no time
to meet the "right" woman is the one
who meets, melds, and moves in with the
"right now" woman. Instant monogamy
might protect us from being alone, but
when we choose convenience over true
compatibility, it doesn't last. Eventually we
break up and we're devastated. Then, we
either repeat the cycle with the next "right
now" woman, or build walls around our
hearts and bemoan the fact that there are
no quality women out there.
Dating isn't really about dating. It's
about you. I can't tell you how many women
I've consulted with who have a laundry list
of traits they're looking for in a partner,
but have given almost no thought to what
they are offering. We all want to be loved
for who we genuinely are, but let's face it:
we can all be better versions of ourselves.
Some improvements are quick and easy.
Try a new hairstyle, update your wardrobe,
take up a new activity or a hobby. If you're
out of shape, start exercising. If you're out
of the loop, take time to read more. In
short, spruce up your house before inviting
someone into it.
Dig deeper. Some self-improvements
aren't as simple as a cool haircut or a
new jacket. Old issues are not going to
solve themselves. In many of the women
I've worked with, I've recognized a need
for therapy, or a serious realignment of
expectations. If you're still carrying around
old baggage, set it down for good through
therapy or self-help. Admitting you have
issues is not the end of the world. Showing
that you're working on them is much more
attractive than being in denial. A great
partner cannot repair your lack of trust,
dissolve your fear of intimacy, or help you
get over your ex. It's not her job to fix you.
And she can't, even if she wants to.
Forgive your exes. If you're still
struggling with old guilt, sadness, or just
a general malaise about your ex, the best
thing you can do for the health of your
future romantic relationships is to forgive
her-not for her sake, but for yours. Write
her a letter, call her, meet her in person (or
only in your mind and heart), and say, "I
forgive you for hurting me." Making peace
with your past and releasing resentment
will open your heart to a whole new world
of possibilities. Besides, talking about your
ex during a first date is a well-known way to
kill a potential second date.
Stop questioning and start asking. The
two questions single lesbians ask me most
frequently are: "How do I know if she's a
lesbian?" and "How do I approach her?"
A woman's hair, nails, clothes, politics, or
playlist are not going to clue you in to her
romantic preferences. The only way you're
going to find out if she dates women is
by talking to her. Be bold-tell her she's
attractive, compliment her on something.
There's nothing wrong with giving another
woman a compliment. If she starts talking
to you, you've opened the door to learning
what you want to know about her.
"I've tried everything you're saying,
and nothing works." When I hear my
clients say this, I recommend that they
see a dating coaching. Is there something
in your expectations, in your beliefs about
love and relationships, or in your dating
patterns that is keeping you from meeting
someone? A dating coach will help you
gain honest, unbiased insight and the kind
of clear guidance that your best friends
simply can't offer.
The Dating Decode.
I've taken
everything I've learned over the past 15
years in my therapy practice, in my oneon-one dating and relationship coaching,
and in my work as a matchmaker to
develop a step-by-step system to help
women find solid matches with the highest
probability of long-term success. Every
woman deserves love-righteous, healthy
love. That is why I've devoted my career
to helping women navigate the lesbian
dating world, and to giving them the tools
they need to find lasting, meaningful, and
healthy relationships. We should expect
nothing less.•
ADVI
DR.FRANKIE'S
LESBIANDATING
TOOLS
The Dating Decode: My new,
comprehensive program uses dual
methodologies in psychology and
matchmaking, and women can utilize
it on their own. This step-by-step
program will not only teach you
how to find love, but how to keep it.
(thedatingcode.com)
Little Gay Book: Available in the San
Francisco Bay Area, Los Angeles, San
Diego, New York, Boston and Hawaii.
Specializing in lesbian and bisexual
matchmaking, our database contains
thousands of women who have been
thoroughly vetted, screened, and
selected specifically for you.
Lesbian Speed Dating: Hosted by a
trained relationship consultant, these
lively events focus on single women
meeting and getting to know up to 12
others, all within 90 minutes.
Lesbian Table for Six: Our newest
lesbian dating offering. A relaxed
dinner party in a local restaurant,
with personal introductions by our
matchmaker. We populate the dinner
table with fun, liked-minded women
from our singles database. They'll be
just your type.
Wing Woman: Exactly what it sounds
like, and exactly what you need: An
outgoing woman accompanies you
to an event, facilitates introductions,
gives pointers, and acts as your
coach, teammate and cheerleader,
all in one.
Professional Coaching: Focused.
Specific. Effective. These short-term
sessions help shift your thinking
patterns, recognize obstacles, and
get you on the path toward a loving
relationship.
YouTube Channel and Blog: Packed
with advice, answers to common
questions, and actionable tips for
every dating situation. My blog has
even more content about surveys,
sex, support, and single-hood.
Learn more about Dr. Frankie
and her suite of dating tools at
littlegaybook.com.
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
21
................................................................................................................................................................
.
BEA
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WHAT'S YOUR ALL-TIME FAVORITE LGBTQ FILM? WHO'S YOUR FAVORITE LESBIAN, Bl OR QUEER FILM STAR?
DO YOU HAVE A QUEER SERIES YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT?
NOMINATE YOUR TOP PICKS AT CURVEMOVIES.COM
IN THE FOLLOWING CATEGORIES:
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26
THE MAKING OF MADONNA
27 FILM FANDOM FUN
28LESBIANSIN HISTORY
FEB/MAR
2017
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To keep herself delighted, our eternally favorite
rocker revisits her musical roots.
BY KELLY MCCARTNEY
"If you look back to history, you'll see
how they all came from the same place,"
Melissa Etheridge says, explaining the
myriad roots of American music. "They all
came from the same musical movement in
the South, from Appalachian music to the
blues coming out of the freed slaves in the
early 19th century, and how they all mixed
together and became the different genres:'
Etheridge recently released MEmphis
Rock and Soul, a collection of classic
Southern soul songs that finds her digging
into the Stax Records catalogs of her heroes' heroes. "When you get down to it, you
realize, Oh, Janis Joplin and Robert Plant
and Mick Jagger were all listening to Otis
Redding. They were hearing Sam and Dave
and going, 'I want to sing like that!' Those
24
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2017
were the artists who influenced me, so it's
like getting back to that seed:'
MEmphis Rock and Soul is the 14th studio album that Etheridge has made over
the span of nearly 30 years, and it sounds
like pure joy. "It was really amazing, probably some of the most fun I've had;' she
says of the recording process, "because I
got out of myself, out of my regular writing
in my head, and the personal stuff, to jump
inside other songs, a musical project-to
go down to Memphis and immerse myself
in the feeling and the people and the musicians and the history. Then, coming out
with horns and background vocals and everything, it was delightfully fun."
To really do it right, Etheridge did indeed
head to the mecca of Southern soul to re-
cord at Willie Mitchell's Royal Studios with
a stellar backing band anchored by the
Hodges Brothers and with vintage gear including one of Al Green's legendary ribbon
microphones. By doing so, she claimed her
place in a music lineage that includes Otis
Redding, Rufus Thomas, the Staple Singers, William Bell, and many more. "I felt so
welcomed, so brought in;' she offers. "The
thing that always struck me so beautifully
about Stax was the interracial thing. It just
didn't matter what color you were. They
were just making the music that they loved.
It didn't matter, the color of my skin. There
I am. Love:'
Even so, Etheridge wasn't blind to the import of making this music amid the issues
of the world. With all that's going on polit-
REVIEWS/
ically and socially, including racial issues
being at a melting point, it was important
for her to revisit these tunes and give them
a new voice. "As I felt drawn to this project,
I really felt those issues rise to the surface;'
she says. "They've always been underneath
there, bubbling. Really, to see them rise
to the surface, it put special meaning to a
song like 'Respect Yourself.'"
For Etheridge's updated version of this
decades-old anthem, she recruited singer-songwriter Priscilla Renea to "help me
make this a colorless statement to all of us,
to all Americans, to all human beings:' The
two women started with a simple premise:
that you can't simply blame and disrespect
everyone around you. "When you change
that, when you respect yourself, then you
change the world and start to think about
things differently and feel like a part of a
great movement," Etheridge offers.
Etheridge sees the parallels between the
great movements for racial equality and
LGBTQ rights. She saw the gay nightclub
shooting in Orlando, Fla.,as a kindred event
to the black church shooting in Charleston,
S.C.: Both involved someone going into a
cultural safe space and making it unsafe. In
response, she wrote a song called "Pulse"
to benefit the Orlando victims.
"I see it all as the same issue, really, because it goes back to the basic fear of 'other; " she says. "That's what's driving these
events. Someone, inside of them, they've
been bred and taught that the problems
come from the outside, from someone
else, that someone's taking something
away from them, so they need to fear. Or
there's something inside yourself you need
to fear that is represented outside of you.
When you get that sort of pressure and you
twist it up with the pain inside a person,
they will explode and act out and do these
horrible acts. It all comes down to the fear.
"We have to deal with it. We have to
find a way to live with inclusion and bring
everyone in, celebrating all of the diversity
and understanding that diversity makes us
stronger:'
An ever-visible, ever-vigilant LGBTQicon,
Etheridge says she is up to the challenges that face us and always feels buoyed
by the responsibility that comes with her
platform. "I never think of it as a weight at
all, because of the times when someone
comes up to me and says, 'Knowing about
you saved my life: I get that. Or, 'When I was
a teenager, you made it possible for me to
come out: That means everything to me,"
she says. "So, if anyone has the chance
to do so much in the world just by being
themselves-and, in reality, we all have that
chance just to come out-I've always been
honored to represent and to inspire a group
of people. And I'll always feel that way:'
Three decades in, making a record
like MEmphis Rock and Soul is but one
way in which Etheridge strives to not
only represent and inspire, but to keep
things fresh-for herself and her fans.
:::0
I
~
C/)
"I have to keep delighting myself," she
says with a laugh. "I have to find the
things that excite me, find the things
I want to do that challenge me. I want,
every time I go onstage, to be excited,
because I get to perform in a certain
way. As long as I keep that going, I believe my audience will be delighted with
me. That's what they want: They want to
experience that creation of music and
delight in it with me. It's up to me to keep
myself delighted. That's my journey."
(melissaetheridge.com) •
KATE
BUSH
I I I
<
I I
MU
Before The Dawn
(Concord Records)
In 2014, UK art/folk/pop legend Kate Bush performed 22 shows at London's
Hammersmith Apollo, her first concert series in over 30 years. Bush has
released the live album of the concert titled Before The Dawn as a 3-disc
CD deluxe edition and 4-disc vinyl edition. The recording is a real treat for
fans who were at the concerts and for those who weren't lucky enough to
grab the tickets that sold out in 15 minutes. But don't expect this release
to be a "best of" compilation. Absent are tracks in Bush's younger, higher
vocal range such as "Wuthering Heights" and "Babooshka:' Instead,
relish mid-career faves such as synth-pop hits "Running Up That Hill" and
"Hounds of Love" in a lovely lower register, and glorious live moments of
her re-blossoming. This perfectionist performer, who some consider to be
the female David Bowie, is a rarity. We queer folk applaud the heartfelt and
dreamy originality of Kate Bush in an increasingly viral world. (katebush.com)
lADYGAGA
Joanne
(lnterscope Records)
We're loving Gaga's new pared-down incarnation of authenticity and
honesty. Her recent activism and philanthropy have found parallel in her
5th album, which reaches back to '60s and '70s rock and folk roots. Joanne
confronts the pain and sorrow of some women's lives (including Gaga's
own) as growing experiences. The album title refers to Gaga's late Aunt
Joanne who died of lupus at age 19; the Melanie Safka-esque title track pays
tribute to the early loss of this female role model. Anger, power, sadness,
and the need to overturn American masculinity myths to get to equality is
a key theme. Guest musicians invited to contribute include Florence Welch
and Beck, who add to a feeling of unpretentiousness and core self. Welch's
moving vocal performance on the track "Hey Girl" is a warm woman-towoman feminist plea to lift each other up; and as we know from recent
events, bad things happen when women hate each other. (ladygaga.com)
FEB/MAR
2017
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A new book by photographer
Roger Cormaacapt.u-~;>.--~~
Madonna's pre-fame style.
. Madonna gazes at the camera in the
summer of 1983, six weeks before the
• r·elease of the debut self-titled alb.um
----that would set her on the road to megare-effi:-1.A-t-t-rese-pl,etos-she--is bel-M--,
---playful, confident-waiting
for her big
vIous y unpu l1shed Polaroid images
-of Madonna, thou ht to have been lost
but recently rediscovered and made
i flt er-ed+trons-th-at-ha've-b-e
e 11 sig 11e d a 11d
• numbered by the photographer. Posing for Corman in a grungy, pre-gen~ri_fied Manhattan tenement, the~image;:,-------,---take us back to a simpler time when
ea strong wannabe shattered
lass ceilin
for women in o
and became a gay icon alorig the. ay.
(madunna66. om) •
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REVIEWS/
Fl
FANS
GIVE
WYNONNA
EARP
THE
THUMBS
UP
ili•II
Katherine Barrell, star of the
supernatural Western horror
series, thanks them.
BY DANA PICCOLI
C
anadian actor Katherine Barrell
has always been an ally, but her
relationship
with
the
LGBTQ
community became a lot more
personal when she stepped into the boots
of Officer Nicole Haught, the fan-favorite
lesbian cop on the SyFy show Wynonna
Earp. "Getting to know fans, hearing their
stories, getting fan mail and letters with
people privately coming out to me and
saying 'You're the first person I've told; or
'You inspired me to talk to my family'-I
think it's a massive difference;' says Barrell.
Clearly, she means a lot to her fans, but
the experience has been profound for her
as well. "Being able to have such a direct
effect on people has been amazing and a
huge privilege. Just being able to directly
talk to the people that the show is helping,
and changing aspects of their lives-I think
for the better:'
Wynonna Earp has made a huge impact
on queer fans, who have been rightfully
guarding their hearts in the wake of the
Bury Your Gays trend. When Nicole Haught
was shot in the chest at the end of Season
1, fans were relived and delighted that she
was wearing a bulletproof vest and would
live to fight another day, and to flash them
her dimpled smile.
Not only does Barrell star in the TV show
Wynonna Earp, her character, and likeness,
have been added to the comic book spinoff as well. Seeing herself immortalized in
the comics was a real trip. "It was crazy. I
mean, that was like next level for me. Even
more than being on TV. Because, as an
actor, I've seen myself on TV already, but I
think to be in a comic book is something
really special and really different. To see
yourself essentially being portrayed as
a superhero, in a way, is really crazy and
beautiful. It took some adjusting, for sure."
Being the face of one of television's most
popular lesbian characters has changed
Barrell's life significantly in the past year.
"Just having people be so passionate about
the show. We have the best fans. I mean,
they petitioned SyFy for a Season 2-that's
how amazing our fans are. They pretty
much got our show renewed. It's been
such a wonderful thing to be a part of,
and so many actors go their entire careers
without ever getting close to anything like
this experience. I'm really lucky."
And to all you Nicole Haught cosplayers
out there: Keep it up. Barrell is overjoyed
about seeing you wearing her Purgatory
police uniform. "The detail and the time
people put into their costumes is just so
wonderful and so cool;' she says. "I'm still
kind of baffled that we are where we are,
and it hasn't even been a year. It's just, like,
where are we going to go from here?"
If you ask fans, the sky's the limit for
Katherine Barrell and Wynonna Earp.
Filming for Season 2 is underway, and
fans are on the edge of their seats when
it comes to Nicole and Waverly, or
WayHaught, as they are also known. When
we last saw Waverly, she had been infected
with a touch of the old evil. What does this
mean for the couple? Guess you'll have to
tune in to the show this spring, Earpers.•
Katherine Barrell will appear at ClexaCon
in Las Vegas, March 3-5. (clexacon.com)
FEB/MAR
2017
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27
SPEAK
ITS
NAME
A new British book of portraits
celebrates LGBT pioneers.
BY SOPHIE WARD
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2017
How
does it feel to be part of monumental change in your lifetime? To be
part of history not because you were
swept up in events, a force majeure, or
a bit part in someone else's war, but because you effected change through your
own agency and determination? All of
you reading this article will have been
part of that movement. All of you are part
of that history. You stood against the tide
of public opinion and calmed the waters
for your own and coming generations
with new laws that you fought for and
civil rights that you claimed. You did it
through the grandest of gestures and
toughest of fights and you did it with
the smallest and most personal of your
choices. You did it with love.
The last 50 years, and the past few
in particular, have seen momentous
change in laws and attitudes towards
LGBT people. We still have so far to go
but we have many new freedoms, and
chief among those is the legal recognition of our right to exist, form families,
marry, divorce and be at the hospital
bedside of our loved ones.
As recently as the 1990s, lesbian
mothers were losing custody of their
children to their ex-husbands purely on
REVIEWS/BO
the basis of their sexuality or whether
they were perceived as "good" (closeted) lesbians, or "bad" (open) lesbians.
Today, the suitability of lesbians to parent is not even open to debate and we
are celebrated for proposing to our girlfriends on Olympic rugby fields in front
of the world's press.
My Korean-American wife moved to
England from Los Angeles to be with me
in 1996. Contrary to everyone's expectations, America was even further behind
LGBT rights than the UK. There was no
legal way to recognize our relationship in
either place, and therefore no imminent
possibility of our staying together in the
same country. But, after much hard work
from pressure groups such as Stonewall
Immigration, the Blair government introduced a policy for same-sex couples. By
following every little byway of this labyrinthine new legislation for four years,
we obtained an indefinite leave-to-remain for Rena. The legend "unmarried
partner of Sophie Ward" was writ large
across the visa in her passport, leading
to many strange interviews at various
international borders, but we sobbed as
we realized we could now officially stay
together. We celebrated with a commitment ceremony in 2000. We felt married
that day but we had no idea that within
15 years equal marriage would be established under UK law.
The understanding that it was thanks
to all the LGBT activists who had come
before us, by campaigning or just living
their lives openly, is central to the analysis of the advance of gay rights and acceptance. A new book, Speak Its Name!
published by the National Portrait Gallery, celebrates the many lesbians, gay
men and famous allies, from James I of
England and VI of Scotland to Elizabeth
Taylor and Kate Tempest, whose portraits form part of their archives. Written
by Christopher Tinker with a full and very
personal introduction by Simon Callow,
the book allows for many happy hours
reading about favorite icons and discovering new ones. Unsurprisingly, the ratio
of male to female portraits noticeably
increases after the 1900s (thank you,
Bloomsbury women) but those early lesbian pioneers make fascinating reading.
Did you know about the artist Rosa
Bonheur (1822-99)? I didn't, and now
long to see an exhibition of her work. Admired by Queen Victoria, who surely did
not know about her private life, Bonheur
was born in Paris and trained at the Louvre's art school. She lived with Nathalie
Micas and later Anna Klumpke and was
awarded the Legion d'Honneur in 1865.
Sadly, her picture does not show her
dressed in the male attire that she had
to seek authorization to wear from the
prefect of police.
Another artist with a preference for
masculine clothing,
Gluck (Hannah
Gluckstein 1895-1978), painted a self-portrait uninhibited by notions of propriety.
A striking individual who had affairs with
society florist Constance Spry, socialite Nesta Obermer and journalist Edith
Shackleton, Gluck also rejected gender
prefixes and other societal impositions
and found continuing success as an artist into later life. You can read more in
Gluck: Her Biography by Diana Souhami.
A luminous portrait of Radclyffe Hall
(1880-1943) by Charles Buchel defies
my preconceptions of the writer as a
tormented woman. Comfortable in her
mannish turn-of-the-century
costume
and cropped hair, the author of The Well
of Loneliness gazes with an intelligent
serenity away from the artist. When I
was first questioning my sexual orientation and longing to know more about
the feelings I could no longer ignore, it
was reassuring to know that such talented and brave women had forged a path
long before my lifetime but those lives
seemed so difficult and, as the title of
her novel emphasizes without subtlety,
lonely.
As a child, I had been labelled a "tomboy," a perfectly acceptable tribe in the
1970s, when wearing dungarees, climbing trees and building Lego forts were
seen as fashionable not aberrant, but I
did not want to be a man. What I recognize when I look at Speak its Name's distinctive portraits now, is that the women
were often simply defining their own
freedoms, the same freedoms afforded
to men of their day, by liberating themselves from restrictive clothing and social expectations.
Still, what women! Alice B. Toklas and
Patricia Highsmith, Greta Garbo and
Marlene Dietrich, Josephine Baker, Billie
Jean King and Maggi Hambling. So many
brilliant and fascinating lesbians and
bisexual women living their lives to the
fullest and in doing so letting the world
know who they were.
These portraits are significant not only
because these women were successful
in their own sphere but because they tell
us and future generations that their lives
are possible. When we are discovering
who we are, we look to these women to
guide us. Radclyffe Hall may have given
me a somewhat mixed message, but
Stella Duffy wrote about sexy lesbians
with modern relationship troubles. Sarah
Waters and Val McDermid were also out
authors including lesbian characters in
their fiction. For full disclosure, an early
photo of me, taken by Trevor Leighton,
is included. I don't pretend to possess
the kudos of the subjects that surround
me, only acknowledge the debt that
I owe them. (npg.org.uk) •
SAPPHIC
SCREEN
Drawing back the curtain
on the queer female
players of Hollywood's
golden age.
BY MERRYN JOHNS
As a gentleman scholar of the golden
age of Hollywood, author Boze Hadleigh
has been sure to include as many queer
women in his 15 books on the subject as
possible, and with good reason: a number
of the most celebrated screen icons were
lesbian, bisexual or queer. His classic Hollywood Lesbians, first published in 1994, was
a delight to read and featured interviews
Hadleigh conducted with stars such as top
1940s box-office earner Barbara Stanwyck, brilliant character actors Dame Judith
Anderson, Sandy Dennis, Capucine, and
Agnes Moorehead-as well as exceedingly rare interviews with pioneering lesbian
director Dorothy Arzner, Oscar-winning
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2017
costume designer Edith Head, and comedians Nancy Culp, Marjorie Main, Patsy
Kelly and Ann B. Davis. In a new edition of
the book, published this past fall, Hadleigh
added chapters on Greta Garbo, Jodie Foster, Ellen DeGeneres and Rosie O'Donnell,
and evaluated their contributions as queer
women to the entertainment industry and
to the wider culture.
There were others he wanted to interview but who declined, such as the late Bea
Arthur. "I kept trying to interview her and
we talked over the phone many times over
the years... She liked the idea of the book
but didn't want to be in it;' says Hadleigh.
Those who did agree to interviews were
guarded, if not hostile. It's almost shocking to read that a furious Barbara Stanwyck ended a cat-and-mouse interview
with Hadleigh and asked him to leave her
house when he raised the topic of marriages of convenience (it's speculated that
Stanwyck's marriage to Robert Taylor was
a "lavender marriage:') All the women
interviewed were deeply conflicted and
closeted, including Edith Head, who gave
Hadleigh an 8-page contract to sign, stipulating that the interview not be published
in her lifetime. "That generation of women
just didn't want the reality [of coming out];'
he tells me. "They came from a time when
Hollywood had nothing to do with reality:'
Even Jodie Foster's coming out at the 2013
Golden Globe Awards has been followed
by silence. "I don't think you'll ever see her
memoirs;' says Hadleigh. "By her own nature she's a very closed person. When people are working in their commercial prime ...
they're that much more difficult to access
in terms of reality:'
Another factor that hides queer women in plain sight is often their bisexuality,
which is more common among Hollywood
REVIEWS/BO
women than men. Add to that the fact
that many Hollywood biographers impose their own morality on the subjects
they admire, and history can become
straightwashed. Take, for example, the
relationship between Katharine Hepburn and Spencer Tracy. Was it real or
staged? "We may never know;' muses
Hadleigh. "He was a good cover for her.
That's always a big factor in Hollywood.
And so, forever more it's 'Tracy and Hepburn: Of course it comes out eventually
that he was bisexual and so chronically
alcoholic he may have been impotent
and not able to have sex after a certain
age:' But Hollywood's made its mind up
about Hepburn: The Aviator portrays her
as a neurotic heterosexual and not the
brilliant bisexual that she actually was.
And then there are the smoke screens
conjured by the stars themselves. As
Mae West once said, "It's not the men
you see me with that counts; it's who you
don't see me with that does:'
For example: "With Garbo, we know
that she was basically lesbian;' asserts
Hadleigh. "But to what degree she was
bisexual we don't know. Did she have
relationships with gay men like Gayelord
Hauser and Cecil Beaton? It's possible,
especially if both those men were trying
to force themselves to be straight for the
sake of their image."
But outing a star, according to Hadleigh, is neither an ethical or effective alternative. "Because if you say X is gay,
lesbian or bi and they say they're not,
that's what the media goes with-and
much of the public. Very often with outing it has to do with how admired is the
person. So if it's a Cary Grant or a Katharine Hepburn, it's much more difficult to
get it out that these people were bisexual because they were so esteemed:'
The new generation of actors is making a difference. "I think they're so much
more open about their sexuality, especially the women. If they're attracted to
another female they'll say it publicly;'
says Hadleigh, citing Jennifer Lawrence
and Amy Schumer. So maybe one day
we'll have a third edition of Hollywood
Lesbians. But for now, this one is certainly a most fascinating read.
Hollywood Lesbians is now available
from RiverdaleAve Books.
LOVE
AT
THE
WHITE
HOUSE
A former First Lady's lesbian affairs.
BY MARCIE BIANCO
SUSAN
WITnc ALBERT
Ywtr-,1,
.. ,.."f..._~
A female journalist falls in love with the
First Lady of the United States. Their love
affair waxes and wanes over 30 years. No
matter that work, competing interests,
even other romantic dalliances threaten
to separate them-their deep bond transcends all of life's ups and downs.
This is the story of the relationship between the longest-serving FLOTUS, Eleanor Roosevelt, and the AP reporter Lorena
Hickok. Their love story is the subject of not
one but two recent publications: the biography Eleanor and Hick: The Love Affair That
Shaped a First Lady, by Susan Quinn (Penguin Press), and the novel Loving Eleanor,
by Susan Wittig Albert (Persevero Press).
These books offer very distinct takes on
the relationship. Quinn's contextualizes the
budding of Eleanor and Hick's relationship
within a larger historical narrative about
America during the Great Depression and
the Second World War. The book is chronological and weaves together chapters that
focus on Eleanor'sand Hick's separate lives
before they met, as well as their separate
lives after they met-for the lives of these
two working women proved a tremendous
challenge to their relationship. They both
traveled extensively: Eleanor, in the role of
First Lady, speaking on behalf of her husband's New Deal programs, and Hick to report on poverty and society throughout the
Depression, an assignment that took her to
the poorest and most remote locations in
the country.
Whereas Quinn is restrained with her
language regarding the amount of sexual
intimacy these two women shared, Albert dives right into it in her fictionalized
account of the relationship, which is narrated through Hick's eyes. Albert's novel
ascribes to many conventions of the lesbian romance and is replete with the typical
language of romance novels in general:
"[Eleanor] took my hand and kissed my
fingers. 'Thank you; she said. 'Oh Hick,
you don't know how much I need you' ... I
leaned forward and kissed her. 'Then come
to me, dear; I said, urgent now, direct:'
But Albert's writing style has a source:
the 3,500 letters uncovered in 1978, 10
years after Hick's death (300 of which
were published in Empty Without You:
The Intimate Letters of Eleanor Roosevelt
and Lorena Hickok, Free Press, 1998). Hick
demanded in her will that these letters remain unopened for that period of time; in
1978, researchers, historians, and friends
of the two women opened up 18 boxes of
letters and other correspondence between
the two women dating from 1932 to 1962,
the year of Eleanor's death. Some of these
exchanges were quite explicit: "All day I've
thought of you & another birthday I will be
with you, & yet tonite you sounded so far
away & formal," Eleanor wrote to Hick the
day after FDR'sinauguration in 1933. "Oh! I
want to put my arms around you, I ache to
hold you close. Your ring is a great comfort.
I look at it & think, she does love me, or I
wouldn't be wearing it!"
It is rumored that Eleanorwore Hick's ring
for the rest of her life, even when the First
Lady was romantically involved with other
men and women. Hick, too, had flings with
other women throughout the decades, especially when Eleanor became distant, for
professional or personal reasons.
These two books provide two different
ways of recording possibly one of the most
unique, compelling, and high-profile lesbian relationships of all time.•
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2017
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31
CHARITY
In Charity, South Dakota the friendship
between Lena Kaiser, a sodbuster's
daughter, and Gustie Roemer, an
educated Easterner blossoms like wild
flowers in the tough prairie soil.
BY PAULETTE CALLEN
32
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2017
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6
ustie shuddered and whispered,
"Oh, my Christ."
Ridges of white flesh, like
twisted ropes, formed a web of
scar tissue that crisscrossed, biting
into Jordis's smooth brown skin. What had
looked like a shadow of dancing leaves
was a hideous caricature of the leaf itself.
Gustie cupped her right hand, dipped
into Crow Kills, and poured water slowly
over Jordis's back. Jordis arched slightly
then relaxed.
"Does it hurt?"
"Sometimes. Water and Grandmother's
ointment help."
Gustie's left hand remained on Jordis's
shoulder. With baptismal motions she
continued to bathe her back.
"How did you get this?'
Jordis took a deep breath. The moon
rose over Crow Kills and let fall a trembling
beam across the water. "I was nine years
old and my brother George was twelve
before we ever went to school. Our
mother kept us hidden, but she could not
hide us forever. The Agency got wind of
us, and we were picked up and hauled off
to an Indian school run by a minister and
his wife. I looked at it as an adventure.
They told me I was going to learn to
read books, and I would come back to
my mother when it was over. My brother
was wild with fear. He was older-maybe
knew more of what we were in for. I do
not know.
"He turned sullen and would not speak
at all. A little kindness might have helped
him get over it, but at the school, they
saw his long hair and before they even
spoke to us, or fed us, or let us rest, they
had to have it off. His beautiful long hair.
'Here, little boys do not have long hair,'
they said. 'Only little girls have long hair.
You do not want to be like a little girl, do
you? They humiliated him. Then, in front
of all of us, they cut off his hair."
Jordis paused and Gustie continued
pouring water over her shoulders, across
the top of her back and the back of her
neck. Jordis relaxed and put her head
down as Gustie massaged the lake water
into the ridged flesh. She kept her head
down and went on softly, "In the middle
of the night, I got out of bed and found
the kitchen. I took a knife, and I cut my
hair off, too. When the matron saw me
in the morning she started howling and
pulled me in to see Everude. He was the
preacher. I will never forget him. An ugly
red-faced man always in a black suit. It
was not that they cared about my hair.
Some of the girls had their hair cut when
they came to the school. I guess they had
lice. I had no lice! They did not care about
my hair-what made them mad was that I
defied them. I did something on my own.
An Indian! A girl. Those teachers and
preachers ...you know, they loved Indians
all right as long as we were docile-like
dogs-and
showed we wanted to be
like them. If we showed any resistance,
they were no better than the soldiers
who poured lead and whiskey into our
fathers and grandfathers. I decided ... !
was only nine, but I decided, if they made
my brother, a Dakotah, cut his hair, I, his
sister, a Dakotah, would cut mine too.
They did not understand it. My brother is
dead. He wasn't made for changes. It is
easier for the women. The changes. The
men could not do it. I have kept it short.
For my brother. I will always keep it short.
For my brother's hair will never grow. So
my hair will never grow long."
Gustie continued
to bathe the
outraged flesh of Jordis's back.
"They starved me all that day. The next
day I started classes. I enraged Everude
even more by being good at my studies.
I learned English. We had to. They hit
us if they heard us speaking Dakotah.
I learned to read, and I read everything
and made a game of passing their tests.
And every time my hair grew out a little, I
hacked it off. After I had been there about
a year, Everude had had enough. He said
I would be 'severely punished' if I ever did
it again. Cut my hair. My hair had become
the most important thing in his life, and
in mine! He was a mean man, and I had
no doubt that I would get a beating.
Beatings were common there. Usually a
few straps in the horse shed with a belt.
I knew I could take it. The next morning
I showed up at breakfast with my hair
hacked off down to the roots. I was some
sight!"
Jordis chuckled and turned slightly,
leaning into Gustie, balancing herself by
resting her hand in the curve of Gustie's
left arm. Gustie continued to massage
the cool water into her back.
"I did not even get all the way through
my bowl of oatmeal and piece of dry
STO
bread before he yanked me from the
table and dragged me to the shed. He
made me take my dress off and lie face
down on the floor. He beat me with a
horsewhip or some kind of whip."
Jordis's hand tightened on Gustie's
arm. Gustie stopped her massage and
held her in the lightest embrace. Jordis
spoke her next words slowly, between
her teeth.
"I did not give him the satisfaction of
making a sound. He whipped me until
I fainted and left me on the floor of the
shed. Later, one of the teachers and the
cook carried me to my bed and dressed
the wound. He would not let them call
for a doctor. It did not heal. They thought
I was dying and somehow the cook got
word out to Grandmother. Why they
were so afraid I would die, I don't know.
The graveyard out behind the school was
full of dead Indian children."•
JORDIS'S
HAND
TIGHTENED
ONGUSTIE'S
ARM.GUSTIE
STOPPED
HER
MASSAGE
ANDHELD
HERINTHE
LIGHTEST
EMBRACE.
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
33
IEWStGIFT
GUIDE
.......................................................................................................................................................................................................................
•·..
11sPP"
'\ ~l~1;~rf\~ 1;'S
\l1~"
-----~-
---
CANDY KISSES
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What a luminous idea: a
candle subscription! Vellabox
delivers high quality candles,
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combined with a bonus
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FIRE AWAY, FIRE AWAY
Get your Jane Bond on with the
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Saturate your lips in lush,
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Perfect for makeout sessions,
its sexy and oh-so-kissable
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••
SAY IT WITH A BOUQUET
MY SPICY VALENTINE
Bring her brunch in bed with a spicy
Bloody Mary cocktail using premium
brand Ketel One Vodka. For a twist on
the classic, try the Ketel One Clamato,
and garnish it with a celery stalk, lemon
wedge, crisp bacon rasher, olives, or all
of the above. (ketelone.com)
There's no simpler way to say "I
love you" than with a Teleflora
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arranged in a collectible
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...
··\......................................
. . ..................................................................................................................................................
.
34
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
IEWStSEX
I meet Sacchi Green, two-time
Lambda Award winner and editor of
Me and My Boi: Queer Erotic Stories,
at my local queer cafe. Our town's
go-to laptop land for the pierced,
tattooed, and gender-variant-the
location of too many Tinder dates and
just enough queer crafting circles-is
busy as usual when I spot Green ordering an iced tea at the register.
She's easy to pick out from this
cafe's particular crowd-not
just because I did my due diligence and
studied her book-jacket headshotbut because she doesn't look like
what many people might think the author of queer, lesbian, bisexual, and
otherwise-non-hetero
erotica would
look like.
She laughs easily at this cognitive
dissonance as we dive right into our
first topic, pronouns and the gender spectrum. "There's no standard
yet for pronouns. There is no longer
a binary system," Green states matter-of-factly. "There are infinite points
on the spectrum now. Which can be
hard. The best thing to do is to ask
someone what they want to be called.
But it might not stay the same, and
it might not be the same thing they
wanted to be called."
She sips her iced tea like a true editor, adding a real-life semicolon to
her sentence. "I can't pass for anything besides a grandmother, at this
point. Which I am. So, It's complicated," she laughs. "But you know, every
generation
thinks they've invented
sex. Have they not heard of the '60s?"
Her latest collection
of erotic
shorts, Me and My Boi, includes stories by of-the-identity-spectrum
writers and queer culture-makers
such
as Sinclair Sexsmith, Tamsin Flowers,
and Sommer Marsden, whose sensual stories all aim to "celebrate masculine-of-center
women in all their
glorious variety," says Green.
Of her editing process, Green says,
"My Call for Submissions always includes a description of what I'm looking for, but I get a special charge
THE
LIFE
EROTIC
For editor Sacchi
Green, titillating tales
have broadened our
rainbow spectrum.
BY YANA TALLON-HICKS
36
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
from stories that surprise me with
something I didn't even know I wanted. Just like the best sex.
"For Me and My Boi, I stated a clear
vision: Tell me stories about more-orless female-identified,
screw-the-binary free spirits of all flavors. Cool
bois, hot bois, swaggering bois, shy
bois, geek boys, drag kings, leather
bois, flannel bois. Young is fine, but
so are butch daddies, mentors, and
role models."
As requested, all the between-thesheets stories contained
between
Me and My Boi's covers do just this.
From bossy blowjobs to tender lovemaking, in old-school
lesbian bars,
Parisian drawing rooms, and hipster
Brooklyn bike shops, queer sex reigns
supreme.
But in the age of high-tech sex
toys, why read erotica? Lesbians and
queers "don't want to be pigeonholed
that way-in the way that has told us
that everything queer must be inherently sexual," says Green. "People
often avoid erotica because they've
read so much bad erotica. I don't
know how many reviews I've read of
my work by writers who say, 'I don't
read erotica but this one is good!' "
So what makes Green's erotica collections good, and, more importantly,
good for us as LGBTQ folks? "Erotic
interchanges
deal with heightened
emotions and sometimes, especially
with queer people, heavily-weighted
baggage from past experiences. With
same-sex characters,
the complex
nature of life for the whole LGBTQ
spectrum adds an edge of potential
risk, whether overt or unspoken. This
can create powerful elements for storytelling.
Beyond all that, those complexities
and risks in our LGBTQ lives make
reading erotica
especially
important for us. The reflection of our own
desires, fantasies, and identities becomes validation
and celebration,
even more essential than the physical
and emotional charge it offers."
(sacchi-green.blogspot.com)
•
4
RAINBOW RUNWAYREVOLUTION
46 NEW YEAR,NEW SKIN
FASHION
ACCESSORIES
NTITY
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
37
es the transition
Kipper Clothiers mak
g to casualwear.
from bespoke tailorin
CLARA FRANK
ADAMS
PHOTOS BY JAY
STYLING BY
FEATURES/
ST
rin Berg and and Kyle Moshrefi
met at a fashion start-up in San
Francisco almost
four
years
ago. "We were both volunteering our time there and quickly realized
that we would make excellent business
partners and decided to give it a shot,"
explains Moshrefi, who is co-founder and
chief creative officer of the San Francisco-based Kipper Clothier.
At the time, Moshrefi and Berg were
strangers, but the neutrality of their relationship proved to be an asset when starting the company. "We had maybe known
each other for about a month. I think that
really helped us actually," says Moshrefi.
"Not only were we building Kipper, but we
were also building our professional relationship. Three and a half years later I can safely
say that we are not only business partners,
but good friends too. That's the key to owning a business with someone else, you have
to like each other!"
How did two strangers click over fashion? Erin Berg, co-founder and chief operating officer shared Moshrefi's frustration
with the lack of options for lesbians and
transgender men looking for high quality,
hand-crafted and well-fitted custom suits.
"After the repeal of Proposition 8, we decided it was time to create something that
served the LGBTQ community around the
idea of accessibility to all genders. That's
when Kipper Clothiers was born and three
years later we continue to provide exceptional menswear that caters to every body
type, despite gender identity," says Berg.
Kipper Clothier makes menswear accessible through a collaborative and educational purchasing process where clients
spend time working with a personal stylist
looking at fabrics and design options, then
works with a tailor to get a precise fit. This
in-depth collaboration
leaves the client
with the product they envisioned, plus
more knowledge about the aspects of suiting and shirting. The word "Kipper" is in fact
an old industry term from London's 19th
century Savile Row and refers to a female
tailor or tailoress. These working women
went jobbing in pairs to avoid unwanted
advances from men. "We thought it worked
perfectly;' says Moshrefi. After creating a
business plan, taking a few courses in en-
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
39
trepreneurship, and talking to as many people as possible, the brand was born.
"The business has grown faster than
we could have imagined;' says Moshrefi.
"We've had a brick and mortar going strong
for over three years and with the recent
launch of our casual collection, we've expanded through e-commerce to be widely
available to everyone looking for quality everyday wear:'
The Kipper Clothier client is hard to pin
down, says Berg. "We don't have a typical
client. We began the company focusing on
making suiting and shirting for women and
transgender folk, but as our brand grew, so
did the variety of people that wanted our
style of suiting and shirting:'
In the midst of the genderqueer fashion
revolution, Kipper Clothier offers clients
self-expression through fashion "as a mode
of resilience against prejudice;' says Berg.
"We are putting that resilience and self-expression front and center for the world to
see. We empower the LGBTQcommunity,
and transgender people specifically, to express their identity through fashion."
And it's not just all about bespoke tailoring, either. Check out the new line of Kipper
Casuals, and get ready for more relevant,
revolutionary and ready-to-wear styles in
2017.(kipperclothiers.biz) •
FEATURES/
ST
ast to coast.
volution goes from co
The queer fashion re
LCE VITA
BY ANITA DO
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FEATURES/
STYLE
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Here are just a few
those events. •
STYLE/
BEAUTY
• BEAUTY FROM THE INSIDE
BeautyWorksWest•
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;;,a;I RESVERADERM
SKIN
LOVE AND RENEW
THE SKIN YOU'RE IN.
SKlNN'
Pure Pore Detoa
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ExtractingCleanS<"r
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Daytime
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PoreReducingSerum
slrumdejour
46
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
Applying topical creams and ointments is
one thing, but nourishing your cells from the
inside is another. The UK's BeautyWorksWest,
newly launched in the US, is working to
replace your daily multivitamin with a special
dietary supplement that addresses aging.
As we age, hormone changes decrease our
ability to absorb vital nutrients. Now you can
boost your nutrients in three key aspects:
Youth, Energy, and Sex. Or maybe all three!
These formulas are a combination of vitamins,
minerals, amino acids and plant extracts.
Take two in the morning and two before
bedtime and let them work their magic. ($110,
bea utyworkswest.com).
•
WINE NOT
We've often heard that a glass or two of
red wine a day is good for heart health
via antioxidants, but the science on this is
sketchy, plus, drinking wine is often not great
for your skin. But you can give your skin a
big sip of the anti-aging ingredient found in
wine without raising a glass. Resveratrol is an
antioxidant found in red wine that is known to
protect skin cells against oxidative damage
and reduce inflammation. In total, Sesderma's
Resveraderm Cream helps to replenish
moisture, recover luminosity and even out
skin tone with its formula of resveratrol,
retinal, coenzyme Q-10, vitamin C and E.
($56, sesdermausa.com)
The pores in your skin are often an indicator of
how happy your skin is. Keep your skin clear
and content with a trio of Skinn products:
Refine your skin with the Pure Pore Detox,
a sulfate and oil free cleanser designed to
strip your skin of dirt, grime, and make-up,
courtesy of natural oils from Brazilian Volcanic
White Clay and Amazonian Green Clay. Using
this cleanser twice daily sets your skin on the
path to detox and renewal. Follow up with the
Daytime Pore Reducing Serum that smooths
during the day, and the Overnight Pore
Reducing Serum which is rich in fruit acids
and brightens your complexion while you
sleep. ($20 and up, skinn.com)
48OUR GENERATIONS
50ELDERLIVING
61QUEEN HELEN
58
MY SPIRITUALITY
BY NICOLE
PACENT
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
47
iflt:x~
MY
SPIRITUALITY
An out bisexual actor reflects on her living faith.
BY NICOLE PACENT
For the past several years now, it's
been pretty uncool to believe in God. At
least if you were born after 1980. And live
in a coastal city. And have ever taken a
science class. As a liberal Millennial who
believes in God, I often feel like I was born
in the wrong generation, or am suffering
nostalgia for a 'simpler' time. My peers
speak about religion in derisive termsGod as an "imaginary friend;' faith as a
"crutch" for when scientific facts are not
"comforting" enough. As an educated
Millennial I regularly debate with my peers
on subjects such as politics, human rights,
art and philosophy. But when it comes to
discussing religion, I fall somewhat silent
for fear of being annihilated by logical,
scientific arguments for which I have no
real answer other than, "I can't explain how,
or why, but I just feel God. I do not pretend
to know, but I feel, and therefore I believe:'
Most of the time, my peers drop the subject
with a final 'agree to disagree' look. No need
to argue or convince, because "to each
their own" is a philosophy I live by.
I don't really mind if others think that
the way I live my life is passe. My fashion
sense has remained squarely in the '90s
and I'm okay with that, so I can deal with the
fact that my sense of spirituality is likewise
dated. Part of me longs for the connections
humans had with each other and with the
natural world before Smart Phones, but
personally I can say that nostalgia doesn't
play a role in my spirituality. I see spirituality
as a way of maintaining a relationship to
the present moment and to the universe
around me-a pursuit which, I would argue,
is necessary for one's own happiness, and
timeless in nature. Look at how yoga has
caught on in Western culture. The practice
has, for a lot of liberal-minded people my
age, taken the place of religious practice-
48
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
I
Follow Nicole Pacent at:
@nicolepacent on Twitter
you tu be.com/N icolePacent
facebook.com/N i colePacentActor
congregation as class, prayer as meditation.
The Sanskrit word "yoga" actually means
"to yoke or unite;' and depending on the
class you attend, "yoga" can mean uniting
with oneself or with God, but always in the
present moment. The popularity of yoga
points to a deep need people have in an
increasingly secular world to quiet their
minds and feel a sense of peace, and a
connection to something bigger. In this
way, Millennials may be more spiritual than
they admit.
People assume that if a Liberal-Millennialof-Faith believes in God we must not believe
in science. I recognize that there are plenty
of religious people in this country who, often
as a byproduct of the church and/or family,
feel that the only way to embrace spirituality
is to reject modern science. But this is not
how my spirituality works. I was fortunate to
grow up in a church, a family, and an area
that did not decry evolution or any other
facet of science, but let science and religion
co-exist peacefully. I owe much of my ability
to balance fact and feeling to the spiritual
discourse and inquiry encouraged by my
pastors. I attended First Congregational
Church of Old Greenwich, Connecticut,
which my mom decided our family would
join when I was a toddler because, at the
one service she'd attended while church
shopping, she loved the music, and the fact
that a very talented female pastor gave the
sermon. (Yay feminist choices, go Mom!).
According to the bylaws of the United
Church of Christ, under which First Church
exists, each individual in the congregation
has what is referred to as "the Right to Private
Judgement:' As explained to me in the year
leading up to my Confirmation, the Right
to Private Judgement means that although
we worship as a Christian community, we
are allowed and encouraged to develop
an individual sense of spirituality. We
were encouraged to take what worked
for us in Christian teachings, leave what
didn't, inquire about other religions and
belief systems, and draw conclusions for
ourselves about the universe around us. At
our Confirmation in ninth grade, we were
asked to read selected passages from our
personal Statements of Faith, individual
declarations of what we believed based
on a year's study and spiritual inquiry.
Some kids shared Christian beliefs, others
said they thought Jesus was less the literal
Son of God and more an awesome hippy
prophet with a tight connection to God (a
belief which aligns with my own). One of my
friends stood in front of the congregation
and proclaimed (in the form of a slam
poem) that a reincarnation-based belief
system made the most sense to him. By
the end of the service, each one of us was
confirmed and went on our merry JudeoChristian-Buddhist-Agnostic way.
See, at First Church our female pastor
told us that all major religions "were just
using different telescopes to look up at the
same star:' We were taught that science is
not in conflict with religion, but is proof of
God's awe-inspiring work. What we were
taught was a "living faith"-a faith that is
ever-evolving; an ongoing dialogue, full
of questions and self-drawn conclusions,
rather than blind belief in what someone
else says is so. And perhaps above all
else, we were taught that no matter what
you believed, it was love, community, and
outreach to those in need that mattered
most. During my junior year of high school,
when the LGBT movement was picking up
steam nationwide and several Christian
sects were denouncing homosexuality as
sin, the First Church congregation voted
to officially take on the title of 'Open and
Affirming; which meant welcoming people
"of all genders and sexual orientations:'
Sometimes I think about what would have
happened if I'd been raised in a church
that didn't embrace the LGBT community,
and I can't help but assume I would have
abandoned religion and lost my connection
to spirituality in general.
In this balancing act between science
and religion I would be remiss if I did
not mention my AP Physics teacher, Dr.
Mazmanian. A man with a Doctorate in
Physics and one of the most brilliant people
I have had the opportunity to interact with,
Dr. Mazmanian (or "Maz;' as he preferred
to be called) was a passionate scientist
and a strong believer in God, and this
seeming paradox inspired me. Maz did
not bring God into the classroom; rather,
his discipleship to the principle of energy
and his openness to the yet-unknown force
that created the universe as we know it
was itself a kind of spirituality. Perhaps the
best way I have ever heard the relationship
of science and spirituality explained is in
the phrase, "Science is the sheet music,
and spirituality is the cello:' Science deals
in logic, spirituality in feeling, and both are
necessary to paint a complete picture of
the universe and my place in it. In the nearly
two years since my younger sister took
her own life, science is how I have been
able to explain that Kim's energy was not
destroyed with her body, and spiritualitymy relationship with the Divine in the
universe-is how I have been able to feel
my sister's eternal life force with me still. I
don't know what the great beyond holds
for us after death-I don't know if Heaven
exists in the utopian way it is explained in
the Bible, or if it is something else entirely,
and I don't know whether or not our
consciousness travels with us there, but I
do find comfort in the belief that I will one
day be reunited with my sister. And I don't
experience that hope as a crutch. I see that
hope as belief in possibility, and possibility
as the core of living faith. There is so much
about the workings of the universe that we
don't yet know, and I allow the not knowing
to translate into possibility, because in
possibility there is magic.
The past few years I have found myself
using the mantra, "Choose magic;' and
when I say it, I am not rejecting fact, but
inviting a sense of wonder into my life.
In this way, I experience spirituality as an
opportunity, as a choice each of us has
in this life to either expand our capacity
for feeling, or remain limited to only what
logic can offer us. As I see it, what it comes
down to is this: If we have the free will to
choose our own paradigm, then why not
choose magic?•
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
49
iflt:x~
HOMES
FOR
OLDER
LESBIANS
Where will we live when we're over the hill?
BY GILLIAN KENDALL
We're all living longer-some
of us much longer-than
ever before. An analysis of worldwide longevity records
published recently in the journal Nature shows that the
oldest age at which people die increased between the 1960s
and 1990s. Though the study shows that it did level off in the
1990s-at approximately 115years!-and does not seem to be
increasing further, many more people are now living to the
age of 100. And all of us, straight, gay, and undeclared,
need places to live that are safe, appropriate, and
enjoyable for our aging bodies and minds. As we get
older and older, where will we live?
Problems: disability, discrimination,
and isolation
For lesbians, aging can present
difficulties
different
from
those
encountered by straight women. For
example, more lesbians live in poverty
or at lower income levels than other
women. "New Patterns of Poverty in the
Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Community,"
a 2013 study from the Williams Institute,
concluded that "as poverty rates for
nearly all populations increased during
the recession, lesbian, gay, and bisexual
Americans remained more likely to be
poor than heterosexual people ...." A
related but less quantifiable problem is
that some lesbians do not have children or
an extended family on whom they can rely
for assistance.
And of course, many of us live in samesex relationships, which do not necessarily
constitute a regular or welcome element
within traditional retirement communities
or assisted living facilities. And even when
we look for homes to live in independently
(that is, not in an assisted living plan),
we can and do experience housing
discrimination.
A 2014 investigation from the Equal
Rights Center (ERC) found adverse
differential treatment (i.e. discrimination)
50
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
against older same-sex couples seeking
housing in senior living facilities. In the
investigation, the ERC conducted 200
matched-pair telephone tests in 10 states:
Arizona, Colorado, Florida, Georgia,
Michigan, Missouri, New Jersey, Ohio,
Pennsylvania, and Washington. In 48
percent of the tests, a caller inquiring
about housing for a same-sex couple in a
senior living facility experienced adverse
differential treatment, compared to a
caller who was not asking about same-sex
accommodations.
Equally concerning, some 41 percent
of LGBT seniors (persons age 50 and
older) in the US are currently living with a
disabling condition. Research from SAGE
(Services and Advocacy for Gay, Lesbian,
Bisexual, and Transgender Elders) shows
that "compared to their heterosexual
counterparts, lesbian, gay and bisexual
older adults are at an elevated risk of
disability and mental distress.... This
means there are at least 1 million LGBT
older adults living with a disability, and this
number could double by 2050."
And even those of us not living with a
recognized disability are subject to stress
related to our queer identities. "Successful
Aging Among LGBTOlder Adults: Physical
and Mental Health-Related Quality of Life
by Age Group," a 2015 study in the journal
The Gerontologist, indicates what most
of us know intuitively-that physical and
mental health can deteriorate in the face of
discrimination and chronic conditions, but
they tend to improve with "social support,
social network size, physical and leisure
activities" and with a "positive sense of
sexual identity." In other words, the desire
of many lesbians to age in community is
good for our health.
Solutions: community living for LGBT
elders
The good news is that all across the
U.S. more and more facilities are opening
that welcome people of all orientations.
In New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, and
Philadelphia, gay-friendly elder housing
initiatives are under way or already in
existence. "It's exciting to see LGBTfocused senior living options across the
country, including the one that SAGE
is building in NYC," says Hilary Meyer,
JD, the director of National Programs at
SAGE. "But there will never be enough
LGBT-focused housing to accommodate
everyone-and not everyone wants to
live in exclusively gay accommodations.
Many people would just as soon stay in
the communities where they have lived
their whole lives. So we've developed a
two-pronged approach. For the folks who
don't want or need LGBT-only housing,
we developed a national LGBT cultural
competency training and credentialing
program for senior service providersSAGECare-so that no matter where
women live, there are no wrong doors
when they need care as they get older."
One of the most progressive and
exciting developments is in Florida,
where, for the first time, an affordable
LGBT senior housing development is
being built. Aimed at serving the LGBT
elder community, it will include subsidized
and supportive housing. The nonprofit
developer Carrfour Supportive Housing is
working with the Pride Center at Equality
Park, one of the nation's largest LGBT
organizations, to create and develop
senior housing specifically aimed at the
LGBT community.Robert Boo is CEO of
the Pride Center. He says that of the 180
members of Centerlink, the national
association of LGBT community centers,
the Pride Center at Equality Park is "about
the seventh largest," and being in Florida it
serves a large proportion of seniors.
Already, the Pride Center offers an
extensive range of senior programming.
For example, every Tuesday some
200 LGBT seniors attend a "coffee and
conversation" social, educational or
entertainment event at the Pride Center,
which Boo says is "a great way for our
seniors to come together and interact.
From 10 to 11 o'clock in the morning,
it's very social, people sitting around
talking, gossiping, kibitzing. At 11,there's a
program from a sponsor, then they break
into smaller groups and play games or
do afternoon movies, entertainment, or
other activities." But despite the extensive
services available to LGBT seniors at the
Pride Center, some problems remain. Boo
cites his organization's finding that "one of
the top issues with LGBT seniors in South
Florida is isolation and loneliness." Given
the potential for housing discrimination,
as well as the likelihood of isolation and
impaired health in LGBT elders, it was
a logical and worthy goal for the Pride
Center to implement a housing program.
Of the new housing initiative, Boo
says, "In the LGBT community there is
stigma and discrimination, because the
Fair Housing Act doesn't necessarily
preclude discrimination against gender
nonconformity. LGBT seniors are staying
longer in their own homes and suffering
from loneliness and isolation. Also, some
60 percent of the elderly are on disability,
so the support aspect of the housing is
important: About 70 percent of the units,
roughly 34 apartments, will be available
only to owners who have a disabling
condition, certified by a doctor, and who
are able to live on their own."
Complementing the extensive senior
programming offered at the Pride Center,
the housing, called the Residences at
Equality Park, will be built on the same
5½-acre campus, a few blocks off the
town's main road, and about 30 miles
north of Miami. In 2008, the Pride Center
purchased the campus in Wilton Manors,
and now it has five buildings, with tens
of thousands of square feet of meeting
and office spaces. Already, some 60
groups and organizations use the meeting
spaces and provide services there; eight
nonprofits are located on the campus.
These and other organizations will help
support and serve the residents of the
new housing facility.
Starting in 2018, the Residences
at Equality Park will open to provide
permanent affordable housing for lowincome senior adults, with a special focus
on members of the LGBT community.
According to Boo, the first phase will
include 48 apartments, a mixture of
studios and one- and two-bedroom units,
a car park, and "all of the amenities that
go along with a housing complex: library,
clubroom, cyber center, laundry, and
more." In the first phase, about 34 units
will be designated for low-income seniors
living with disabling conditions, such as
HIV/AIDS.The remaining units will provide
affordable housing for seniors who earn
less than 60 percent of the area's median
income, which would mean people
earning up to approximately $35,000 a
year. Phase two, for which funding has
not yet been applied, is expected to have
about 75 or 80 additional apartments, and
possibly a pool.
For aging lesbians and our families,
hopefully this trend will continue and
make it easier to plan for our own old-age
housing. (pridecenterflorida.org) •
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INHARMONY
Paula Kimper's radical muse.
BY GILLIAN KENDALL
Opera has traditionally been dominated by
boy-meets-girl love stories, but composer Paula
Kimper has written the first one about lesbians.
Kimper, who has received many commissions
from august musical institutions and is a Columbia
University Community Scholar, knows firsthand about
lesbian commitment. "I'm a lesbian," Kimper says.
"I'm out, and I'm married. I live in New York, and
as soon as it was possible in this state, we
got married."
Long before marriage equality was a
reality, Kimper was writing feminist works.
A graduate of the Eastman School of Music,
Kimper has been working for over 30 years
in the New York area, composing for opera,
theater, dance, television, film, and song.
She has taken femininity and womanhood
as her subjects, composing
songs
based on the poetry of Elizabeth Bishop
and Rumi; she has written works with
historical themes, including the operas
The Captivation of Eunice Williams and The
Bridge of San Luis Rey, based on the novel
by Thornton Wilder. Kimper's opera Truth,
an American opera about Sojourner Truth,
premiered in New York in 2013, played the
Academy of Music in Northampton, Mass.,
and now tours nationally.
But, most important, Kimper says,
"I've written four operas, and they all
have really strong women. That's sort of
my mission-to bring strong women to
opera. These women are strong, heroic,
and they have a happy ending. In opera,
most lesbians don't:' Kimper's operas
feature these heroic women as complex
lead characters. "Working in a large-scale
opera format reflects my aspirations as
a female musician and composer in a
traditionally male-dominated world," says
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Composer Paula Kimper
Kimper. "Growing up, I was told, 'Girls don't
play the trumpet; but I did it anyway; I was
one of just a handful who did. I am pleased
to see significant numbers of women
making music today, and I think the new
generation of female artists should feel
entitled to equality:'
In 1994, when Kimper began writing the
opera Patience & Sarah, an adaptation of
a historical novel by Isabel Miller, she had
no expectations about the legalization of
gay marriage. At that time, Kimper says,
"We were still aware of and struggling
with the issues that these ladies in the
opera did 200 years ago." The opera
premiered in a sold-out run at the 1998
Lincoln Center Festival, at a time when gay
marriage still wasn't legal in America. In
2015, an ensemble performed Act 2 from a
shortened "chamber opera" version at the
LGBTCenter in Greenwich Village on what
proved to be a historic day for gays. "We
did just one performance;' says Kimper.
"It was on June 26th, the day the Supreme
Court made the gay marriage decision!"
Kimper describes her recent work as
"kind of counterculture," adding, "very few
composers are their own producers."
Her next project is a new commission.
One Art will be based on Elizabeth
Bishop's poetry and set to music for the
soprano Laure Meloy. While the work is
still underway, audiences can expect to
encounter fine music and strong women
characters: a harmonious combination for
lesbian listeners. (paulakimper.com) •
HAVING
FUN
WITH
FEMINISM
Meet satirist Sarah Pappalardo.
BY MARCIE BIANCO
Lesbians are funny and comedy is in our
blood. Many of the most beloved lesbians
in mainstream American culture started out in
comedy: Ellen, Rosie, Wanda, Tig.
And if Sarah Pappalardo's success is
any indication, the younger generation
is carrying our iconic comedy status
forward. Pappalardo, 31, is cofounder, with
her sketch comedy colleague Beth
Newell, of popular website Reductress.
Since 2013, Reductress, which satirizes
women's magazines, has been heralded
as the feminist Onion and one of the best
websites on the Internet. You may not
recognize Pappalardo's tomboy style, but
you might remember headlines like "I Lived
It: A Lesbian Hit on Me, Again;' "5 Iconic
Lesbian Sex Scenes to Frantically Turn Off
When Your Mom Walks In," and "Sure, I'm
a Feminist, but if I Support Other Women,
How Will I Become the Highlander?"
Shortly after the launch of the website,
Pappalardo and Newell were approached
to write a book, but decided to wait for
the right moment-and a viral headline. "In
2014, we had posted a piece, 'The Prettiest
Feminist of 2014,' and people went ape
shit over it, thinking that it was real;' recalls
Pappalardo. Around this time feminism
started trending, and so the idea for the
book was born. "We thought, Why not
make a terrible manual about how to win
at feminism based on all these weird mixed
messages and unrealistic standards that
have been handed to us, a little bit by the
media and a little bit by other feminists?"
says Pappalardo. Humor aside, she notes,
"The goal is to come away not thinking that
feminism is a monolith-we can ultimately
be whoever we want."
How to Win at Feminism: The Definitive
Guide to Having It All-and Then Some!
hit bookstores in October. The tonguein-cheek title imparts the message that,
despite what the media suggests, feminism
is not a competition. Pappalardo explains,
"The implication that comes with all politics
these days is that we must be the best at
it, and somehow that shaming other people
makes us better at it, and we must read
all the books and do all the things, and
we must be gorgeous, and we all must be
some kind of robot Gloria Steinem:'
For Pappalardo, no topic is off-limits,
but one thing she avoids is "punching
down," she says, "which is kind of like a
fundamental comedy rule at this point. We
want to make sure that we're making fun
of the perpetrator and not the victim, and
that's what allows us to talk about things like
rape and rape culture, misogyny, and race
without being dicks about it.
"Our job as satirists is to help people be
more media aware, be more aware of the
small messages being sent, and hopefully
just use that awareness to not succumb
to the tricks that have been used time and
time again and have just taken on different
forms for each generation:'
How to Win at Feminism holds delicious
morsels for lesbians, with a full chapter on
"how to go through your lesbian phase,
whether it's one minute, or five years, or
your entire lifetime:'
In addition to the book and book tour,
Pappalardo and her team have ideas in the
works about the next stages of Reductress,
beyond the website and podcast. A stage
show coproduced with Second City is
scheduled to tour in 2017, and they are
currently pitching a TV show. The endgame
is world domination. "Whatever Oprah did
to women's media;' Pappalardo says, "we
want to do to women's media satire."
For Pappalardo and her Reductress
collaborators, there is a social function to
humor, and to satire in particular. Satire
and feminism make great bedfellows,
and Pappalardo is headlong between the
sheets, having a terrific laugh and making
us laugh, too. (reductress.com) •
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QUEEN
VEE
Celebrating Supercoach,
Violet Palmer.
BY LYNDSEY D'ARCANGELO
Violet Palmer is glad to be retired.
But that doesn't mean she's at home
working on crossword puzzles or learning
how to crochet. That's not who she is.
PaImer, 52, has never been one to sit back
and watch the world go by. When she was
given the opportunity to become one
of the first fem a le referees in the NBA,
she took it knowing it would change
her life completely.
"At the time I got the call from the
NBA, I was the full-time recreation
director for the City of Los Angeles,"
Palmer explains. "I was pretty stable and
comfortable. Taking the job in the NBA
was like taking a leap into the unknown.
But I trusted my instincts. I knew I was
up for the challenge and that I could do
the job."
In 1997, the concept of women's
equality in the sports world was still
elusive, and the backlash to Palmer's
hire reverberated throughout the entire
professional
basketball
community.
Commentators, sportswriters, players,
and fans all questioned the move and
spoke out about it in mocking fashion.
The media attention was overwhelming.
But Palmer blocked out the noise.
"Everyone in the NBA circles knew
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about me already because I had been
refereeing in the Summer League," she
says. "But there was this uncertainty
among coaches and players. 'Can
we yell at her? She's a woman-is she
going to be afraid of us?' Hearing all
those things, I just said to myself, 'I'm
a referee. You can say what you want,
as long as you're not disrespectful. I'm
here to do my job.' And that's how I
approached it."
History was made when Palmer
stepped onto the court to ref her
first official NBA game, between the
Vancouver Grizzlies and the Dallas
Mavericks. She was "scared out of [her]
mind," nervous and excited. She felt
that the whole world was watching,
expecting her to fail. But once the ball
sailed out of bounds and Palmer blew
her whistle, that was it. Everything else
faded into the background. It was just
another game.
"For me, it was always about proving
that I had earned my keep, and that I
belonged on the court. When you're
out there refereeing the best basketball
players in the world, you have to be at
your best. Whenever I walked out there,
I was ready to go to work."
Palmer spent nearly 20 years as
an NBA referee, and in that time she
earned the respect and admiration of
players, coaches, and fellow referees
alike. They dubbed her "Queen Vee"
and accepted her into the fold as a
woman and a lesbian. At the beginning
of her career, Palmer says she was
reserved about coming out because of
all the focus on her gender in a male-
dominated
sport. She thought that
adding "lesbian" to the list would be too
much and take even more focus away
from her professional qualifications.
But as time went on, and society itself
evolved, Palmer decided
it wasn't
that big a deal anymore. In 2014, she
married her longtime girlfriend, Tanya
Stine.
Throughout
her career,
Palmer
says she never had any player use
discriminatory language toward her or
make homophobic comments in her
direction, despite it being common
knowledge that she was a lesbian.
She believes it's because the NBA is
a diverse organization
that pushes
for equality on a variety of levels, a
sentiment that can be backed up by
the league's recent positive actions
regarding LGBT issues and concerns.
NBA Commissioner Adam Silver took
part the New York City Pride Parade
this past summer, and also made the
decision to move the 2017 NBA AllStar Game out of North Carolina after
HB2-a law that blatantly discriminates
against transgender
individuals-was
passed.
"I think my coming out happened
organically, as it was supposed to,"
Palmer says. "I never felt like I was
hiding anything, because no one ever
publicly asked me about it. And the
players were always totally professional
and respectful with me. There was
never anything said about my gender
or my sexual preference, and I'm proud
to say that."
This past summer, Palmer finally
decided to hang up her whistle. Her
body was showing the effects of
running up and down the court every
night, and her extensive travel schedule
off the court was becoming too much
to bear. But that didn't mean she was
ready to give up working altogether.
Palmer took another job with the NBA,
this time as the manager of Referee
Development. She gets to share her
knowledge and experience, and advise
young, up-and-coming referees in the
league-something
Palmer is more
than happy to do.
"It's a way for me to help the next
generation
of referees get better.
And to go out and critique and train
is something I'm excited about. So,
I'm not really retired. I'm just retired
from running."•
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2017
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BRIDGING
THE
GAP
A lover of older women reflects
on her new relationship with a
younger woman.
BY JILL BENNETT
"I want to set you up with Lauren Neal."
"Great. Okay."
I was a few months out of a relationship and, as a lifelong
serial monogamist, I had no idea how or where to begin
the dating game.
"She's amazing. Ashley and I saw her one-woman
show last year." Haviland reached for her phone and
pulled up IMDb for proof. "She's smart. Talented.
She graduated from Brown, and she's hot."
Yeah. Damn. Lauren was hot, but
she looked really young. "How old is she?"
"Twenty-three. I think?"
Twenty-three? Like, just
graduated from college? Of
another generation? A Millennial?
Oh, boy.
Older women. Always. That was my rule.
Older women didn't struggle with their
sexual orientation. Older women knew what
they wanted and pursued it. Older women
just didn't play as many games.
I came out young compared to most
lesbians in my age bracket: I was 19.
College wasn't all that great for dating in
the mid '90s; most of us fell into the trap
of being someone's "experiment" at least
once. Anyone under 30 probably wouldn't
recognize the word "LUG;' but falling for
a Lesbian Until Graduation was a painful
reality for many Gen X lezzies. Moving to
Los Angeles was a godsend for a sexually
frustrated Midwesterner like me.
LA was once home to a multitude of
lesbian spaces-before they all disappeared.
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In the late '90s, Girl Bar was the sapphic
playground of my dreams. It was there
that I discovered my appreciation for older
women, who brought a welcome change
after a series of heartbreaking, collegiate
flings with non-committal, bi-curious types.
I soon settled into my first long-term
relationship with a woman twelve years my
senior. The pairing didn't work out (though
not as a result of our age difference), but it
did fortify the idea that older women were
the only logical option moving forward; only
once did I date someone my own age. Each
new relationship ran its course; each ended
for reasons unrelated to age.
At the same time, the gay community
was mobilizing. Gay straight alliances
popped up in high schools across the
country. Media representation gave LGBT
kids role models: Ellen came out; Will &
Grace ruled the airwaves. Lesbian websites
such as AfterEllen, Autostraddle and
SheWired added to the conversation and
the rapidly changing landscape. Kids were
coming out in college and high school and
younger, often dismissing and sometimes
even mocking the "L'' and "G" labels that
my generation had embraced in order to
achieve visibility.
I won't lie: the first time I heard a 13-yearold declare themselves a pansexual gender
non-conformist, I laughed. Loudly. Don't get
me wrong: I applauded how far we'd come.
It was fantastic that younger generations felt
that sexual and gender identity issues were
no longer political hot buttons. Millennials
seemed to live as if we had achieved that
very lofty goal of mainstream assimilation.
In 2012, while attending the very same
rural high school where I'd witnessed daily
harassment of the one openly gay student,
my own niece verified that being gay "wasn't
a big deal at all:'
Many Millennials have transformed
sexuality into a non-issue. As a result, most
lesbian spaces, physical and virtual, have
shuttered their doors. Over time, I found that
most younger women eschewed labels and
weren't particularly interested in gay spaces.
Truthfully, they didn't need them the way my
generation had.
While I admire the confidence of these
younger women, I often find myself
mourning the loss of our collective identity.
lack of women of color in movies and TV
to the refusal of many white, self-professed
progressives to acknowledge
Black
Lives Matter or why such movements are
important. Hell, I now notice when Lauren
is the only POC in a room, and how that
changes the conversation ...or doesn't.
Our friend groups have also meshed
surprisingly well. Most of my friends are
in their mid-to-late 40s; Lauren's circle is
primarily composed of her college friends,
all of whom are in their mid-to-late 20s.
We've mixed and mashed our cliques
for both social and creative purposes
and we've all left these exchanges a little
bit more "woke" (as the youngsters like
to say).
Perhaps it's a consequence of finding
a truly compatible person, but I believe all
of Lauren's and my differences have been
nothing but advantageous. We each offer
the other truly unique and new perspectives
under almost any circumstances. It's this
kind of open-mindedness and unity and
mutual respect that I found lacking in this
last U.S. election, even-and especiallyamongst liberals. Everyone knows how that
turned out.
There is still a slew of forces working hard
to delegitimize the love and livelihood of
members of myriad minority communities.
To present (and practice) a united front
in these current and future battles, it's
going to take empathy. It's going to take
a diverse coalition of individuals, one that
connects women and people of color and
religious communities.
We have entered a new era that
necessitates that we bridge the gap. It is
vital that we abandon our preconceived
notions and open up to the possibility that
we have something to learn from each
other. I did just that and I was lucky enough
to find the love of my life.
One can imagine my surprise, thenat age thirty-seven-when
my friend
announced that she was setting me up
with a 23-year-old. I had a pretty negative
attitude toward Lauren's generation. I had
three long-term relationships behind me;
none of them had worked out, despite my
best efforts.
It was for these reasons that I dove in
without any expectations. Lauren and I both
figured this could be fun, a fling; neither of
us thought it would yield anything lasting.
What could we possibly have in common?
We weren't just 14 years apart in age. We
were different races (I'm white; Lauren is
mixed) and different religions (I'm Jewish;
Lauren was raised a non-denominational,
cultural Christian). Even worse: I lived in the
Valley, and she lived in Los Feliz.
Almost four years later, I can attest that
our differences are our strengths. Except
the distance thing, that was non-negotiable
(Lauren now lives with me in the Valley).
While I'd trudged through the battlefield
of couples therapy numerous times,
Lauren's experience
with
long-term
relationships was limited. Her lack of
"baggage" was refreshing, to say the least. • •• • • •• • • •• • • • • •• • •• • • • • •• • • •• • • •• • • • •• • • • •• • • •• • • •
As a novice, Lauren was open to assessing
how best to navigate any issues that arose;
At the time this article was written,
Lauren and I decided to hold our wedding
I had years of intense therapy that guided
on December 17, 2016, before the US
me to address our bumps in a healthy way.
As a sexual and religious minority, I have
presidential inauguration. This decision
was not born of fear; rather, we knew for
always done my best to educate myself
on issues that impact people of color. Still,
certain that this timing was always meant to
until Lauren came into my life, I didn't really
be. This was the moment we'd been waiting
grok the all-encompassing reality of racism
for. After all, the personal is political, and
in our world. I now notice more, from the
vice versa.•
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2017
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LANDMARK
LESBIANS
How two real-life lesbians
inspired a statue at Stonewall.
BY BRIAN KANTZ
I PORTRAIT BY DONNA VICTOR
A few years back, legendary English
actors Sir Ian McKellen and Sir Patrick
Stewart took to the streets of Manhattan
on a warm autumn day. In town to headline
revivals of No Man's Land and Waiting for
Godot, the two decided to add the role of
tourist to their repertoires.
They strolled from
landmark to
landmark, chatting with fellow pedestrians
and snapping photos along the way. Their
journey eventually led to Christopher Park,
a small wedge of Greenwich Village green
space that is the site of Gay Liberation, the
preeminent American monument to the
gay liberation movement.
McKellen and Stewart sat on the
monument's bench, bookending the
lacquered bronze figures of two women
touching hands, and mugged for the
camera. Stewart promptly tweeted the
image to his 2 million followers with the
simple message "Stonewall!"
Those seeing the tweet surely recognized
the actors. But what about the sculpture?
Who are those women? And what makes
their story so important that it is forged in
bronze for the ages?
The answer: Leslie Cohen and Beth
Suskin modeled for the sculpture-and
their story started at Buffalo State College.
Buffalo State College, Freshman Move-In
Day,1965
Leslie Cohen's mother recognized the
voice immediately. Not someone she knew
personally, but someone she was very
familiar with-a fellow Jewish mother.
"Where you from?" she asked, setting
one foot inside a neighboring Bishop Hall
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2017
dorm room, no invitation expected or
required.
"Hewlett Harbor!" Beth Suskin's mother
looked up and replied.
"Oh, really? Did you just arrive?"
"Yes:'
"Is your daughter a freshman, too?"
"Yes:'
"Oh, maybe you two can be friends,
Les;' Cohen's mother said, turning to her
mortified daughter.
That's it. That's how LeslieCohen and Beth
Suskin met. Just like so many freshmen who
meet on their very first day on campusat the mercy of their embarrassing but
well-intentioned parents-and then stay
connected for years, decades, a lifetime.
College Days, 1965-1967
After the Move-In Day introduction,
Cohen and Suskin did, in fact, become
friends, just as Cohen's mother had hoped.
The two initially connected over music,
sharing a love for R&B,Motown, and jazz.
Cohen and Suskin had fun together
freshman year, but not everything was
rosy. They had arrived at college under very
different circumstances, and they were still
just teenagers. Cohen chose Buffalo State to
get away-far away-from her life in Queens
and her parents' vitriolic relationship. She
reveled in her newfound freedom and loved
the social interaction she found on campus.
Suskin, on the other hand, had left her high
school boyfriend behind to go to college.
Despite the 400 miles between them,
the boyfriend kept close tabs on Suskin,
calling daily and incessantly inquiring about
budding friendships. Feeling as though
she were under CIA surveillance, Suskin
retreated from college social life. And her
isolation led to depression.
"We didn't speak over the summer
break, and during the first semester of our
sophomore year, I would occasionally see
her in the halls, but we were like strangers;'
Cohen said. "It was difficult because I
missed her and, even worse, I knew she
missed me:'
The free-spirited Cohen flew to Italy
the second semester of her sophomore
year to participate in the college's popular
study-abroad program in Siena. When
she returned, she learned that Suskin had
officially transferred to Hofstra University to
be closer to her boyfriend.
New York City, 1969
Cohen graduated from Buffalo State in
1969, the year Neil Armstrong walked on
the moon. The year they began the Vietnam
War draft lottery. The year Ted Kennedy
drove off the bridge near Chappaquiddick.
The year "Broadway Joe" Namath called his
Super Bowl win. The year of the Manson
murders. The year Jimi Hendrix nationalanthemed Woodstock. The year the
Stonewall riots started the gay liberation
movement in the United States.
Seriously, what didn't happen in 1969?
Cohen decided to immerse herself in
artistic chaos amid the societal chaos and
enrolled at Queens College in New York City
to pursue a master's degree in art history,
where she studied surrealism and Dadaism.
She also read books by Colette and Ana·is
Nin, who wrote openly about their affairs
with other women, and articles by Betty
Friedan and Gloria Steinem, who wrote
about women's liberation and Sapphic love.
Her mind swam. She grew up in the
1950s, a time when every girl was expected
to get married-to a man, it went without
saying-have children, and live happily ever
after as a housewife. The white picket fence
of expectations. But that no longer seemed
to be what she expected for herself. She
didn't fit that mold.
Meanwhile, Suskin had already started
that expected life. After leaving Buffalo
State, she married her boyfriend in 1967
when she was 19 years old. Although it
worked at first, the marriage eventually
buckled under the weight of her husband's
jealousy. "His paranoia made me more
mentally ill than I already was," said
Suskin, who stopped singing for 11 years
because her husband couldn't handle the
attention she gained from being on stage.
"I could have no eye contact with anybody,
because if I did, he would accuse me of
having an affair. I stayed in my bed for six
years after we married. I had my beautiful
standard poodle, Damien, with me all the
time. He was my sole source of emotional
connection:'
It was the most painful time of Suskin's
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59
life. But things would change for Suskinand for Cohen.
Opening of Sahara, 1976
After grad school, Cohen landed a
dream job at Artforum magazine and later
became curator of the New York Culture
Center. There she worked with well-known
artists, writers, culturati, and a lot of very,
very rich people. This public, glamorous
art life contrasted with her private, not-soglamorous gay life. After her first intense,
romantic relationship with another woman
ended, Cohen mourned the loss for a
year, but then realized that the hurt she
felt confirmed what she knew to be true.
"I was free-liberated in a way that I had
never experienced before;' she said. "I no
longer felt shame about being a lesbian.
Accepting my sexuality helped unleash
me from society's constraints of gender
and role playing and both defined me and
emboldened me:'
She began accompanying friends
to gay bars, which had effectively been
outlawed and, therefore, were operated in
the shadows by the mafia. The mob ran the
clubs without liquor licenses or a thought
toward sanitation. Entering a gay bar in
the '60s was like entering a bar during the
Prohibition era-back alleys, secret knocks,
and the ever-looming threat of police raids.
Cohen and her friends soon tired of
the scene. That was no way to live, they
thought. So they did what young, hip,
college-educated people do-they stayed
up late into the night and devised a plan
and identified a funding source. The plan?
Cohen, Michelle Florea, Linda Goldfarb,
and Barbara Russo would open New York
City's first women's club, showcasing
women in art, politics, and music. It would
be revolutionary. It would be stylish and
upscale. "A club created by women for
women," read the opening invitation. They
called it Sahara, an oasis in the desert of
conformity-in May 1976 at a highly visible
location in Manhattan's fashionable Upper
EastSide. And what a club it was.
Sahara hosted big-name celebrities,
up-and-coming entertainers, influential
politicians, and thousands upon thousands
of everyday women and men who swooned
over the club's Italian sectional couches,
swaying palm trees, rain lights, pumping
sound system, and world-class collection
of wall-to-wall artwork, curated by Cohen. "I
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wanted to increase our visibility, to educate
the outside world that lesbians existed in
all shapes and sizes, to extinguish the false
notions and stereotypes so that we would
not be so foreign to them," Cohen said.
College Reunion (of Sorts), 1976
A few weeks before Sahara opened,
Cohen received a phone call from Dottie
Coyne, a friend from Buffalo State who
worked in Manhattan's garment district.
"You are not going to believe who's here
with me right now;' Coyne said. "Beth
Suskin from Buffalo State! She came in for a
job interview and I just hired her!"
Cohen nearly dropped the phone. Beth
Suskin. Beth Suskin. Beth Suskin was backand no longer married. A few days after the
phone call, Cohen hosted a reunion at her
fourth-story walk-up for Coyne. Cohen and
Suskin talked for hours that night, catching
up on 11 years apart. It was a wonderful,
glorious second chance. They both knew it.
Cohen and Suskin eventually got
together in 1977, after a whirlwind of
circumstances, ancillary relationships,
"should-we-or-shouldn't-we?" head games,
societal pressures, and back-and-forth, raw,
vulnerable letters-or, as Cohen called it,
the "maelstrom of love:'
A Monument Unveiled
Sahara closed after four years, when
the property's owner-who
had plans
to develop the high-rise into high-rent
apartments-stopped cashing the club's
rent checks and surreptitiously forced
them out of their lease. The club's partners
didn't have the financial means to fight the
battle in court, but they did leave a powerful
legacy as the owners of an establishment
that changed many hearts and minds
during a pivotal time in American history.
Which takes us back to Christopher Park
and the Gay Liberation monument. Two
weeks before Saharawas padlocked, Cohen
received a call from David Boyce, a friend
from the art world. He said that George
Segal, the nation's most prominent
figurative sculptor, who had just
completed Abraham and Isaac,
the Kent State
memorial,
had been commissioned
again by the Mildred
Andrews
Fund
to
create a sculpture
commemorating
the Stonewall uprising of 1969. Boyce
had thought of Cohen-strong-willed,
proud, outspoken-and
was delighted
to learn that both she and her partner,
Suskin, were equally ready for this historic
assignment. "We have always received
incredible feedback about our relationship;'
Suskin said. "Love is contagious. People
see love and it's hard to be aggressive or
antagonistic."
Although the sculpture was proposed in
1979 and received community and design
approvals by 1982, public opposition and
a planned renovation of the park delayed
the sculpture's installation for 13 years. New
York City Mayor David Dinkins unveiled the
monument in 1992.
On June 24, 2016, President Barack
Obama
recognized
the
historical
significance of the 7.7-acre Greenwich
Village site by naming it Stonewall National
Monument, the first gay rights site to be
designated as a national monument and
part of the National Park Service.
"We consider it such an incredible honor
to have sat for this monument and to have
our story be connected to the larger story;'
Suskin said. "All these years later, we still
can't believe it. When we're in New York
City, we'll sit across from the sculpture and
just watch people interact with it. Kids climb
all over it. Grown men and women cry in
front of it. It's very moving:'
Cohen and Suskin married in October
2015 in Florida, 50 years after meeting at
Buffalo State and 39 years since becoming
a couple. For Leslie Cohen and Beth Suskin,
the meaning of life is simple. The meaning
of life is love.
Adapted from a story that originally
appeared in 1300 Elmwood, the alumni
magazine of Buffalo State College.
n any discussion of "older women" in
the entertainment industry, Helen Mirren's name is sure to come up. In fact,
she leads by example in and out of
Hollywood-women everywhere see
her as a role model and as someone to hold
up as proof of how to age authentically.
I remember seeing Helen Mirren speak
at a New York Times TimesTalks event in
December 2015 and thinking how classically beautiful she was, how she embodied
a timeless and a thoroughly modern sense
of class. There was her gorgeous black
dress, which clung to her hourglass figure.
Her black patent-leather Mary Janes. Her
trademark ash-blond silver bob. And her
unmistakable trio of facial features-the
gimlet eyes, a nose that always seems to be
making a point, and a mouth that can be at
once sensual and severe.
At 71 years of age she is a knockout.
Earthy and yet elegant-she's
played
Queen Elizabeth II on the screen and
the stage. In part, she is suited to playing
women with power because she is British
and has studied at the Royal Shakespeare
Company. Director Julie Taymor saw fit to
cast Mirren as Prospera in her 2010 film
adaptation of Shakespeare's The Tempest,
giving Mirren the formerly male lead role
of Prospero. That sense of status you dis-
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cern in her is both innate and inherited.
Dame Helen Mirren was born llyena Lydia
Mironoff, the granddaughter of a Russian
count who lost everything during the 1917
Bolshevik Revolution. Her spirit is no doubt
a legacy of her parents, who spent their
youth enduring the Great Depression and
the Second World War in London, which
was by all accounts a grim place to be. But
beyond a "stiff upper lip" and all that, Mirren chose openness and joy early in life. At
a young age she decided to be independent, especially financially, as her parents
advised, but also to be creative, strong, and
beautiful, and that none of these qualities
need exclude any of the others.
Fiercely intelligent and discerning, Mirren understands the power of "yes:' And by
choosing a great variety of roles during her
career, she's never become typecast. "My
roles became much more interesting after
I hit 40 than they were before;' she said at
TimesTalks.Two approaches helped her immensely, she said. The first was just hanging in there and rolling with the industry's
punches, and the second was returning
to her great love and training ground-the
theatre-every three or four years.
Her enduring appeal has also to do with
her intelligent approach to acting. The
characters she chooses are strong, but
their strength is manifest in their vulnerabilities and their ambivalence. She has
this approach in common with her contemporaries Meryl Streep, Jessica Lange,
and Isabelle Huppert. "We're all vulnerable,
complex, insecure people-all of us. That's
our job as actors, to reflect the nature of
humanity."
Famous for her Oscar- and Tony-winning portrayals of QE2, she is best known
to lesbians as Detective Jane Tennison, the
alcoholic alpha-female in the gritty British
police procedural series Prime Suspect.
"I leapt at it," she says of the role. "God,
yes! And then I became very proactive in
guiding it along and keeping it rooted in
reality and ordinariness. Making sure Jane
remained in the real world:'
Prime Suspect aired from 1991 to 2006,
as Tennison rises from detective inspector to detective superintendent; Mirren's
portrayal influenced a generation of "hardboiled" female characters in shows such as
The Closer and Law & Order. When asked
in 2015 what she imagined her character
might be doing now, Mirren responded,
"She's a lesbian, living with a very attractive
female partner:' Music to our ears!
Alas for us, Mirren herself is by all accounts straight and has spent the past 31
years with the director Taylor Hackford;
FEATURES/COVER
they divide their time between homes in
Los Angeles and Puglia, Italy.
Since Prime Suspect, Mirren has worked
constantly and seems to have had her pick
of roles. At print time, she has four films in
pre- and post-production with her most recent releases including Trumbo, Woman In
Gold, Eye in the Sky, and Collateral Beauty.
In the military thriller Eye in the Sky Mirren
plays Col. Katherine Powell, an intelligence
officer in command of a top-secret droneled operation that identifies suicide bombers in Kenya. However, she is faced with
a tough decision between capture or kill
when a supposedly innocent girl enters the
target zone occupied by terrorists planning
their next strike. In something completely different, Collateral Beauty, released at
Christmas, features Mirren as Brigitte, a
theatrical character with a unique relationship to a troubled advertising executive
played by Will Smith.
Tell us about your most recent film,
Collateral Beauty.
It's a wonderful film with some dark
themes, but told in a very optimistic and
inspired way. Will Smith is the star and he's
very good in it. The story shows us how
something beautiful can still happen even
after some ugly events.
There seems to be no stopping you! Interesting roles in good films just keep on
coming.
I learned a long time ago that you need
to play very different roles in order to avoid
being confined to any one category or type
of character. This is what has helped me to
continue finding interesting work over the
past 20 years or so. I wasn't really expecting
to be able to work so much and I'm still very
excited by the kinds of characters I've been
getting to play.
(f)
~
Was a role like Jane Tennison instrumental in raising your profile in Hollywood?
I'm sure it helped but you can never
know, really. I honestly can't explain why
things have worked out so well. There is
certainly an element of luck in all this, but
I also believe that it was the kinds of roles
I chose to play which has also helped me.
When it comes to choosing the next role,
I usually try to find something opposite to
what I've just played. And over the years,
I've always been inclined towards taking
risks and playing extravagant or extreme
characters. Playing in a film like RED,for example. I think as an actor it's important to
shake the tree a little.
Are you as enthusiastic as ever about
your career?
I'm having a lot of fun getting to do all
kinds of movies. I love working in movies,
I love going to movies, and I enjoy being
able to be part of both big and small films,
working on action movies or doing very serious dramas. I'm open to all kinds of stories
and I hope to keep having opportunities to
work with wonderful actors and directors.
Many people cite your career as an example of how women should be able to
find good roles at any age.
There's more acceptance of women now in different roles and we need
to keep telling more stories about
women and wherewomen can occupy
STORY
significant parts.
In your previous film, Eye in the Sky, you
play a senior military officer. Is that a role
that might not have gone to a woman five
years ago?
Would it have gone to a woman five
years ago-probably not. I play a military
colonel who is a woman in charge of a
very important mission. She's presented as
someone who is just as capable of making
important military decisions as a man-and
also capable of being just as unscrupulous
in doing so. I think what's responsible for
giving women more opportunities in Hollywood is that we're seeing more women
in the real world who are occupying important positions, running companies, and
being influential in many ways. Films are
going to keep reflecting the way women's
roles in society are changing and gaining in
importance.
Mirren means business in RED
I THINK AS AN
ACTOR IT'S
IMPORTANT
TO SHAKE
THE TREE A
LITTLE
Do you think that women are still unfairly
objectified because of their age or their
appearance?
Of course! We're constantly being
judged by our looks in ways that don't apply to me. When I was younger the aesthetic model for British girls was Twiggy and I
suffered because of that, because I was
never stick thin like that. Women are constantly being subjected to the pressure and
stress of needing to conform to a particular
physical type.
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Did you always want to act?
What sparked my interest was a staging
of Hamlet I saw when I was 14 or 15 years
old. It was an amateur production, so it
left a lot to be desired, but I was absolutely
amazed with the world that Shakespeare
created and the excitement of theatre in
general. That sparked my interest in Shakespeare, and after that I started working in
plays in high school. My theatre teacher
would have us do scenes from plays as
part of our classes in English literature and
French literature. I enjoyed that a lot and
always wanted to participate. That was the
point when I started to dream about the
possibility of becoming an actress.
Describe yourself when you first started
your career working in the theatre.
I was very idealistic and I had very specific ideas about acting and performance
that fortunately dissipated with age. But
the motivation was always the same: telling
stories as a way of inspiring an audience. I
was also ambitious and I was determined to
gain recognition. I worked a year with Peter Brook and it was very educational. I also
realized that if your want to have a good
career you need to find projects where
people are going to remember your name
and that there needs to be something striking or compelling about the nature of your
role.
Would you like to do more theatre?
I try to go back to the stage every three
or four years. Theatre will always be important to me. It probably stems from a sense
of guilt. In Britain, there is still this idea that
a real actor needs to do theatre.
After you won an Oscar for The Queen,
did it give you an added sense of security
or validation as an artist?
There's always insecurity and doubt in
this profession. It's just inevitable. In many
cases, those projects where I feel I've done
my best work have not necessarily been
the most successful. You can never predict which films are going to turn out well
or those where everything goes wrong.
Every film and every performance you
give is subject to interpretation, and no
performance is ever perfect. So that keeps
you on edge and it inspires you to keep
pushing yourself.•
66SAPPHO LIVESI
70BRIDESON THE CAPE
74MUJERESWITH PRIDE
68
A SOJOURN IN
SANTA FE
curve
FEB/MAR
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65
The timeless
beauty and historic
significance
of Greece.
BY CYD STURGESS
For as long as I can remember, I have
been fascinated by the mythological
world of Ancient Greece. So, when the
opportunity arose for an early summer
getaway to Athens, even Heracles couldn't
hold me back.
Arriving at Athens International Airport,
I'm surprised by the mildness of the
evening. Knowing that temperatures in the
capital can reach a stifling 99°F in August,
the balmy June sunshine and light breeze
is refreshing after the plane journey. I pick
up my bulging suitcase and opt for a taxi to
Kolonaki, the district closest to the Hilton
hotel where I'm staying. Those who can
bear to leave the extra pair of Birkenstocks
at home will find that the bus and metro
offer cheaper alternatives to reach the
city centre.
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In the taxi, I watch as the dilapidated
stores and buildings on the outskirts slowly
transform into stylish and sophisticated
bars in the centre, revealing a chic,
cosmopolitan cityscape. By the time I've
dropped my bag in my room, the sun has
faded and I head to the rooftop bar to
catch a glimpse of the ancient Acropolis,
now lit by a sumptuous evening skyline.
After some shameless Snapchatting,
walk to
restaurant
Cookoovaya
(cookoovaya.gr), named after "the owl"symbol of Athens. The open kitchen shows
the chefs working hard-everything at this
Greek fusion restaurant is made fresh on
site-and the tuna steak I order is one of
the best I've had.
I start the next day in an equally opulent
manner; with a languid dip in the pool,
followed by a heavenly bowl of honeyed
prunes and Greek yoghurt-what else?before catching the metro to Monastiraki:
the heart of the city. At the station, I notice
the merging of modern and ancient
architecture that characterizes the capital;
Monastiraki is one of several stations that
boasts an archaeological excavation
site. If that wasn't enough to get you
underground, the metro is the fastest and
cheapest way to get around the city, with
tickets costing an average €1.40.
Although it's early, the sun is already
beaming down on Greece's most famous
tourist attraction and I grab a muchneeded bottle of water before I begin my
ascent to the ancient citadel. Entering
the Acropolis through the impressive
Propylaea gateway, I catch sight of the
Parthenon; the temple dedicated to the
goddess Athena. (Legend has it, Athena
and Poseidon tried to win over the city's
inhabitants at the Acropolis by offering
them various gifts in a bid to become the
city's patron. No prizes for guessing who
won that competition.)
After drinking in the splendor of the
Pnyx hill, birthplace of democracy, I visit
the Acropolis museum. Designed as a
FEATURES/
direct mirror of the Parthenon, the huge
windows fill it with natural light. Upstairs,
the cafe offers panoramic views of the
historic hills and on Friday evenings it
comes alive with jazz performances.
G(r)eek-out complete, 10 minutes from
the Acropolis I dine out at vegetarian
and
vegan
restaurant
Avocado
(avocadoathens.com),
where
almost
everything on the menu is locally sourced,
seasonal and organic. Necking a zingy kiwi
and ginger smoothie, I stroll through the
Plaka, a picturesque quarter decorated
with beautiful boughs of bougainvillea,
before heading to lesbian-owned wine bar
and restaurant By The Glass (bytheglass.
gr) in the Syntagma area. Here, I submit
to my Dionysian desires and slake my
thirst into the early hours with the bar's
extensive-and delicious-wine selection.
The following morning, I wake up
slightly worse for wear and, attempting to
make amends with my body, I check into
the peaceful Hammam Baths (hammam.
gr). Entering the beautiful marble steam
bath, I soothe my symptoms with salts and
lotions before cooling down with some
fruit tea and sweet treats.
Rejuvenated and relaxed, I leave the
Hammam and head to hip international
eatery Mama Roux. After devouring
their famous "hush-puppies" (cornmeal
croquettes served with chutney and
Creole mayo), the shrimp tacos, doused in
chili yogurt, lime and guacamole, are the
perfect light lunch. Myrovolos, just across
town, is another popular food-stopwhich at night also turns into a busy bar for
girls who like girls.
Speaking of which, I arrive at Platia
Kotzia just in time to catch the start of the
Athens Pride parade. It is a relatively young
festival and I'm surprised by the sheer
numbers gathered. As the crowds pass by,
the placards supporting LGBT+ migrants,
queers of color, and trans and gender
non-conforming people make it one of
the most inclusive parades I've seen. Not
yet commercialized, it's clear that the
focus remains fully on Athens' colorful and
vibrant queer community.
Instead of joining the crowd, my
friends and I take a trip to the Clumsies
(theclumsies.gr)
to
sample
their
experimental
cocktail
menu before
hopping on the metro to Kerameikos for a
night at Athens' most famous lesbian club:
Noiz. With '90s classics and funky Greek
hits, the club is jumping and it's a great end
to our Pride celebrations.
The morning after the night before is
shakier than usual with a two-hour ferry
journey from Piraeus port. Arriving at the
secluded and luxurious island of Hydra,
however, I soon forget the undulating
ocean voyage. Famous as a bustling
bohemian hub in the early 20th century,
Hydra later became a favorite retreat of
the Rolling Stones and Pink Floyd, and I
can see why.
With cars and motor vehicles prohibited
by law, the entire island exudes a serene
tranquillity. After a few busy days in the
Greek capital, a weekend on this idyllic
island is just what the doctor ordered.
I spend an afternoon idling in the sun,
peeking in the quaint boutiques along
the port, and visiting Hydra's Historical
Archive. As evening closes in, we enjoy
waterfront restaurant Castello, where
glamorous owner Iliana eagerly shows
us the private beach where they recently
celebrated their first gay wedding service.
TRAVEL
With the sun setting on my last evening
in Greece, I take in the view before me.
Despite the heartache of the migrant
crisis and the financial strain that has
burdened the country over the past
decade, I have seen an entrepreneurial
spirit blossoming in Athens, and a Pride
parade that made the streets come alive.
I don't know when I'll next return to
Greece but when I do, I'll make sure
to bring my own Aphrodite with me.
Who knows, soon Iliana might be telling
guests about the Sapphic ceremony she
witnessed on their beach.•
A painting of Sappho by eroticist
Edouard-Henri Avril depicting the
lesbian sexual practices apparently inspired by the Greek poet.
Today, you can't really carry around a
lyre to indicate that you are Sapphically
inclined. However, there is another
more fashionable option. The Sappho
necklace was created by Ali Greenberg
to make it easier for you, and for women
you might meet socially, to identify
each other. "Because I am femme and
also attracted to them, it was nearly
impossible to meet someone without
risking the sheer embarrassment
of hitting on a straight girl," explains
Greenberg. Her creation, the Sappho
necklace is a lucky charm when dating
in Straightsville or in our increasingly
The Sappho
necklace
blended community where identities are
not always easy to discern. It also makes a
great gift for the single lesbian in your life,
or for your valentine. (sappho.life)
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Santa Fe's tag line is "The City Different"
and, sure enough, it's not like anywhere
I've ever been. It holds strong appeal
for lesbians, being a place that respects
the unconventional while preserving its
historic roots. It's also a font of creativity;
it's the second-largest art market in the
US and many artists choose to live here,
including brilliant abstract painter Rose
Masterpol. Popular standup comic and
activist Dana Goldberg is a New Mexico
native, starting the Annual Southwest
Funnyfest in nearby Albuquerque over
ten years ago.
The cultural capital of The Land of
Enchantment, Santa Fe has galleries,
gift shops, gourmet restaurants, iconic
architecture,
landmark
properties,
and high-end and budget retail, as
well as a mesmerizing history and rich
indigenous culture. A world capital of
silver, turquoise and Native American
ceramics, UNESCO honored Santa Fe by
naming it one of only 19 crafts and folk
art Creative Cities in the world. Satisfy
your inner collector and check out the
Museum of Indian Art and Culture and
its unique collection of pottery, jewelry,
textiles, and paintings; or just browse
the 250 galleries in town. But really, the
FEATURES/
whole city is a work of art: landscape
and streetscape form a uniqueness that
was embraced when New Mexico gained
statehood in 1912.
Where to stay? The centrally-located
La Fonda On the Plaza (lafondasantafe.
com) is a palatial adobe hotel built in
the Spanish-Pueblo Revival style and
since 1922 it's been the social pulse of
the town. This romantic property makes
the perfect location for an anniversary
or a wedding; it boasts the city's largest
ballroom and the event spaces are
decorated with fireplaces, chandeliers,
and original Southwest art. It's also
conveniently located to the galleries
of Canyon Road and the nearby market
square where you can bargain for
authentic, handmade Native American
Indian goods. And it's an easy walk to the
Georgia O'Keeffe Museum (gokm.org),
which pays tribute to an artist who lived
life and created art on her own terms.
An iconic American, O'Keeffe's works
and her image have always held great
appeal for lesbians. She considered New
Mexico to be her spiritual home, "the
most wonderful place you can imagine."
Anywhere in Santa Fe will mix you
a delish margarita, but have one and
some scrumptious bar bites at La Fiesta
Lounge, the lobby bar of la Fonda, which
has been restored to its "desert deco"
glory. Santa Fe is thought to be the first
export destination of Mexican tequila
and, to honor this, the local tourism
folks have created a Margarita Trail so
that you can discover the town's unique
mixology. Pick up your "passport" from
the Downtown Visitor Center and get
ready to enjoy 31 margaritas made with
100% agave tequila from participating
restaurants. But be careful: Santa
Fe is 7200 feet above sea level and
alcohol metabolizes differently at high
altitudes. So drink slowly! And eat.
The food is distinctive and delicious,
from appetizers such as grilled corn,
tamales, or fried peppers to heartier fare.
A source of local pride is the influence
of pueblo Indian cooking, such as
breads freshly baked in beehive-shaped
outdoor ovens. And of course red and
green chile; you'll soon be requesting a
side of green chile with everything you
order! There's an unofficial Santa Fe
Chocolate Trail showcasing the region's
finest chocolatiers.
A day trip out of town puts you in
New Mexico wine country. The first
vines were planted there in 1629 by two
monks, that's about 150 years ahead
of California. There are currently over
60 wineries and tasting rooms in New
Mexico for you to enjoy, but beer drinkers
have not been overlooked: pick up the
local beer map produced by the New
Mexico Brewers Guild and find some new
brews. Work off those calories by taking
an outdoor hike in O'Keeffe country, or
wander the Foothill Trails, which can also
be experienced by bike or on horseback.
For something totally different explore
the new immersive art museum Meow
RED CHILE SAUCE
Red Chile is one of the staple
components of many recipes in
New Mexican Cuisine and can be
used on lots of different dishes
including meat and vegetables.
Hearty, spicy, mellow in flavor and
deliciously warm, especially in
winter, it goes particularly well with
chicken enchiladas. This recipe
comes courtesy of the Santa Fe
School of Cooking.
TRAVEL
Wolf (meowwolf.com), which is backed
by Game of Thrones creator and Santa
Fe resident George R.R. Martin and will
spark many deep conversations about
what it all means.
Winter can be a great time to visit, with
acres of ski-worthy terrain that receive
an average of 225 inches of snow. Or
visit in summer for Pride, which is held in
late June. Hosted by the Santa Fe Human
Rights Alliance (santafehra.org) enjoy
the parade and a vibrant street festival
including information and networking
booths, live entertainment and an art
show featuring artwork by the local LGBT
community. (santafe.org) •
Ingredients:
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1/2 cup finely diced onion
2-3 tsp minced garlic
2
tbs all purpose flour
1/2 cup pure ground New Mexican
red chile powder
21/2 cups water or chicken stock
1 tsp Mexican oregano
1/2 tbs freshly ground cumin seed
salt to taste
Method:
Heat the oil in a medium saucepan and saute the onion for 3 to 4 minutes, until
softened. Add the garlic and saute 2 minutes more. Stir in the flour, the chile, and
slowly add the water, whisking to break up any lumps in the chile. Add the oregano
and the cumin, and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat and simmer for about 20 minutes,
or until the mixture has thickened slightly. Season with salt to taste. Enjoy!
FEB/MAR
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For over 50 years, gays and lesbians
have flocked to Provincetown on Cape Cod
for summer vacation. Primarily a pilgrim
colony and fishing village, it became an art
colony in the 1880s, with painters drawn to
P-town's light and picturesque landscape.
By the first half of the 20th century, a
good percentage of resident and visiting
artists were gay and lesbian-dramatists,
poets, and performers, and they spread
word that it was an ideal summer place for
gays and lesbians. By the '70s and '80s,
gay-owned inns and guesthouses sprang
up; stores, restaurants, bars, parties and
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FEATURES/
performance spaces added to the pride
of place, feeling of safety, sense of identity
and self-expression. Parts of town became
especially gay and/or lesbian, such as the
clothing optional Herring Cove Beach, or
more for guys (the West End), or for the
girls (the East End). And before long, there
were enough lesbians visiting P-town to
create a market for programmed events.
Lynette Molnar moved to Provincetown
in 1995, but she had been going there since
before she was of legal drinking age. Molnar
grew up in Pittsburgh and lived for some
time in San Francisco, but Provincetown's
"drop dead gorgeous beauty, absolute
gayness, and the gentleness, quiet,
sense of ease and safety" all keep her in
P-town where she owns a house and runs
ProvincetownForWomen.com.
"There is nowhere in the world like
Provincetown, and nowhere that has
such power and visibility for lesbians,"
says Molnar. "Even on a day when there
are straight daytrippers, we are the town,
and there's a certain empowerment in
that. Everyone on the LGBTQ spectrum
is welcome here and everyone on that
spectrum is safe here."
Lesbians in particular are visible, from
artists, to business owners, to those
representing government. And Molnar
is one of those artist-businesswomen.
An avid photographer, her subject is
"the gloriously beautiful landscapes, the
changing lightshow, the seasons, and the
activities and signs that make up those
seasons. I continue to be exhilarated by it
every single day." A former innkeeper, she
now focuses on producing events during
Women's Week in October, and offers
four summer highlights for women: Single
Women's Weekend (May 19-21), Memorial
Day Weekend (May 25-29), Women of
Color Weekend (June 1-4) and Girl Splash
(July 18-22). "The summer starts with
Memorial Day and the 20-somethings,"
says Molnar, "and Girl Splash draws the
middle-age range. Women's Week has
tended to skew older. That said, every age
group is represented every day here and I
think that's pretty amazing and beautiful."
This year at Women's Week she noticed
many new female faces and a new energy,
too. A highlight of the week was the soldout show Women's Week IDOL, which she
produces. It features singing contestants
and encourages improvisation between
hosts, performers and audience to
produce an electric sense of sisterhood.
Also notable is the camaraderie between
the hosts, which include the nation's top
lesbian standup comics such as Kate
Clinton and Vickie Shaw. "I am so moved
by these women," says Molnar. "I have
never experienced that kind of true,
noncompetitive support in any other
environment or field I've been in."
This special atmosphere is evident to
newer owner-innkeepers Alli Baldwin and
Ilene Mitnick. Their charming, Frenchthemed, 6-room inn, Roux Bed & Breakfast
(rouxprovincetown.com), is not only an inn,
but the base for Bride Pride: The World's
Largest Lesbian Wedding. The inaugural
event was held on October 15, 2016 and
106 women (53 couples from 15 states and
Canada) gathered on the property's front
lawn to take vows. Some women married
for the first time; others renewed their
vows, such as Fran Dunaway and Naomi
Gonzalez of clothing label TomboyX.
"What was most moving and beautiful
to us was witnessing the reaction of
women from states where it might be legal
to marry, but not necessarily comfortable,"
says Baldwin. "The town opened its heart
and soul to these women."
"Provincetown is about love, equality
and acceptance and it's meant to be
shared with lovers," says Mitnick. "Even
when we were mired in the logistics
of planning the event, we were everconscious of what was going to happen
here-that
there would be over one
hundred women simultaneously saying 'I
do' in the state where gay marriage was
first legalized," adds Baldwin. "It was a
gorgeous sight. Lives changed. The lawn
was glowing the morning after."
But as fabulous as it was, the first Bride
Pride fell short of its Guinness Book of
World Records goal of 100 couples. Bride
Pride 2017 is poised to set that record on
July 22 during Girl Splash at the height
of summer. (The earlier date reflects
community concern over the presidential
election, with some couples expressing
a desire to marry sooner rather than
later.) "We're thrilled to be able to offer
up the opportunity to women to discover
Provincetown and marry against the
backdrop of the most accepting place in
the country," says Mitnick.
Should you plan to visit with your bridal
TRAVEL
party and find that Roux is already full, stay
instead at the lesbian-owned Seaglass Inn &
Spa (seaglassinnandspa.com). Proprietors
Nadine and Faith Licostie have revamped a
large hotel offering amenities such as a spa
treatment center and inground pool set
among gardens. It's an easy downhill walk
to the lovely restaurants of the West End
and there's plenty of parking on property
if you came via car.
In addition to traveling to Provincetown
to marry, do explore the sand dunes
and breathe in the salty air. In season,
take a relaxing and romantic sail with
Moment
Sailing (momentsailing.com)
and the delightful Capt. Chris Bartick.
This intimate experience on a beautiful
small-to-medium-sized yacht with friendly
commentary and a young skipper showing
off one of his favorite harbors is a thrill.
Take a relaxing sunset dune tour
(artsdunetours.com) and enjoy a clambake
on the quiet and pristine beach (weather
permitting). See the famous dune shacks
and learn about artistic and aquatic life.
Wander the East End gallery district
on Commercial Street and drop into
Provincetown Art Association and Museum
(paam.org), which has been nurtured to
excellence by its energetic and dedicated
executive director Christine McCarthy, or
pick up a gift at the lesbian-owned and
operated Womencrafts, a feminist fixture
for 40 years. Take a guided historic walking
tour of Pilgrim Monument, which is the
most stunning vertical landmark on the
Cape Cod peninsula to discover how this
paradise first began.
"I absolutely see the possibility of
Provincetown as a lesbian destination
continuing with younger women," says
Molnar. "They respond to being here
in the same way that I did decades
ago. Newcomers, no matter what their
ages, truly have the same reaction to
Provincetown the first time: they're blown
away, and they're falling in love."•
GETTING TO AND AROUND P-TOWN
If you're not driving, take the fast ferry by
Bay State Cruise Company from Boston to
MacMillan Pier (baystatecruisecompany.
com). In P-town, pick up a bike rental at
Gale Force Bikes (galeforcebikes.com).
Grab some delicious sandwiches and cycle
to the seashore for a bracing stroll or swim.
(visit-provincetown.com)
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Kelli Carpenter
Last year, R Family Vacations and Olivia
Travel-two of the best known LGBT travel
brands-partnered
to create a unique
vacation experience not just for singles and
couples, but for all lesbians, gay men, their
friends and families. They chose the Hard
Rock Hotel Vallarta in the LGBT-friendly
Mexican coastal town of Puerto Vallarta
for their July 2016 launch. According to
Kelli Carpenter, co-founder of R Family
Vacations, it was an unprecedented
success. "It was a really wonderful
partnership. All in all, people were very
happy," she says. "The entertainment was
fantastic, the resort was beautiful, and
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the guests loved it. There was some great
feedback, which we've taken on board, and
now we'll be partnering with Olivia again
this July."
The location will also be Mexico, this time
at the all-inclusive, full charter Club Med
lxtapa Pacific. This beachfront haciendastyle family resort is uniquely positioned
to deliver the experience that R Family
and Olivia wish to offer, says Carpenterespecially in regards to parents who love
to travel with their kids but also want some
quality adult time during vacation.
"There's no staff better than a Club
Med staff," says Carpenter, "especially
their innovative club for children. The
enthusiastic and attentive G.Os, as
Club Med calls them, have diplomas or
experience in childcare, and are in charge
of the kids' club and baby program,
allowing you to feel relaxed and confident
that your children are being taken care
of-whether that's providing them their
playtime, walking, feeding, or naptimewhile you relax."
And if that sounds like a rare offering
at an affordable resort, so are the other
inclusions: free Wi-Fi, gourmet dining,
open
bar, entertainment,
activities,
and all taxes and gratuities. In such a
carefree environment, there'll be plenty of
opportunity to catch some relaxation and
romance, says Carpenter-regardless of
parenting status. "Not only is Club Med's
food delicious, but lxtapa truly has one of
the most beautiful sunsets that I've ever
seen. I'm excited to go back there, and to
have R Family working with Olivia again."
But that's not all: R Family will join forces
with another big name in travel, Celebrity
Cruises. Voted Best Premium Cruise Line
four years running, and boasting a chic
and unique onboard experience, Celebrity
Cruises is officially rolling out the rainbow
carpet. Last year the company approached
R Family founders Kelli Carpenter and
Gregg Kaminsky to curate and produce
onboard experiences specifically for LGBT
cruise groups.
DISCOVERTRUE LOVE
EXECUTIVE
GAYMATCHMAKING
FIRM
"It's the very first cruise line to offer selfproduced LGBT trips," says Carpenter.
"Gregg and I will be acting as licensed
travel agents through the TZELL Travel
Group for the LGBT individuals and groups
onboard. Our first group will be sailing to
Alaska in July, and included in the onboard
experience will be select talent tailored to
LGBTaudiences, including our Manhattanstyle piano bar player, singers, the comic
Jessica Kirson, and other talent to be
announced."
Four Celebrity Cruises per year will
cater to LGBT guests, with existing
Celebrity offerings such as the Top Chef
at Sea cooking challenge and the Taste of
Film being tweaked exclusively to them.
Celebrity Cruises already has a "big gay
and lesbian clientele," says Carpenter.
"However, we have a likemindedness
in terms
of our
preferences
in
entertainment, comedy, and even dining
that I think is different to mainstream
audiences. I'm proud of them for taking
their already excellent programming and
tailoring it to the gay and lesbian guests
onboard. Gregg and I can't wait to host
these groups and welcome everyone
aboard for a very memorable vacation at
sea." (rfamilyvacations.com) •
Club Med lxtapa, Mexico: July 8-15, 2017
Rated the #1 family resort in Mexico by Trip Advisor, this oceanfront all-inclusive
experience is big on inclusions: 8 days/7 nights accommodations, food, beverages
(including alcohol), games, most activities, and special Olivia and R Family
programming and entertainment, all-day Kids' Club activities for children of all ages;
(babies and toddlers 4 months to 3 years at an extra charge), and round-trip airport
transfers included.
LGBT Group Cruise to Alaska: July 21-28, 2017
All aboard the Celebrity Solstice-including the LGBTcommunity and their friends.
Visit scenic Alaskan highlights, plus spend an evening in beautiful Victoria, B.C.
Exclusive entertainment including Sail Away mixer, LGBT cruise hosts, welcome
party, NYC piano bars, special theme nights, gay and gay-friendly group dinners,
LGBT comedy, musical performer, late night "Guerrilla Gay Bars," exclusive shore
excursion, and exclusive Celebrity Cruise activities.
Bespoke Matchmaking works with
professional gay men and lesbians who
are serious about meeting the right
person and who are ready to begin a
loving relationship. Our firm provides a
highly regarded alternative to the
typical forms of dating.
Contact us to schedule
a complimentary consultation
1-888-422-6464
BESPOKEMATCHMAKING.COM
In 2017, Madrid will celebrate the
40th anniversary of its first Pride
Parade, in 1977. Madrid Pride, now a
five-day celebration, and one of the
biggest in the world, draws around
1 million people annually. Twice that
number, a whopping 2 million people,
attend the parade itself. The celebration
unfolds in the city's gay district, Chueca
(visitchueca.com), just off the Gran Via
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in the city center.
Madrid Pride kicks off with the
inaugural proclamation
in the Plaza
de Pedro Zerolo and culminates with a
closing ceremony at the Plaza del Rey. In
between, and in addition to the parade,
there are over 100 Pride-related events,
from the High Heels Race-for the drag
queen in you-to guided museum tours
for LGBT visitors.
THE HOST OF WORLD PRIDE
Spain has long been a leader in gay
rights: When it legalized same-sex
marriage in 2005, it was only the third
nation in the world to do so. Currently,
Madrid has a 72-year-oldfemininstmayor,
Manuela Carmena, and she is vocally
supportive of sexual diversity. In light of
both its heritage of progressiveness and
the 40th anniversary of Pride, Spain will
host the 2017 World Pride in Madrid, with
the opening ceremony on Wednesday,
June 23, and the closing ceremony on
Sunday, July 2.
The city anticipates over 3 million
people for nearly 10 days of festivities,
so there is talk of moving Pride from
Chueca to the more open area of the
Madrid Rio Park and Matadero Madrid,
a stunning contemporary arts center
adjacent to the Manzanares River. At
print time this decision had not been
made, although the spacious Rio would
make World Pride more accessible.
While the schedule of events is still
tentative, the Human Rights Conference
is confirmed for June 26 and the World
Pride Parade is scheduled for July 1.
FEATURES/
WHERETO STAY
During my visit this past summer,
I stayed at the H10 Villa de la Reina
(H10hotels.com),
a 4-star property
conveniently located on the Gran Via.
The hotel offers a soothing ambience,
a tasteful blend of design elements, hip
lobby bar, comfy and well-equipped
rooms, free Wi-Fi, and a full breakfast
included. Don't expect a huge room
with a view: The hotel is the product of
a careful restoration of an early-20thcentury building in an old European
city, so space is at a premium. However,
everything
you
need,
including
shopping, restaurants, and the gay
neighborhood,
is right outside your
door, so get out there and enjoy it!
THINGS TO SEE AND DO
Make time to take in all the beauty
and grandeur the city affords, but with
temperatures climbing to a sweltering
100 degrees Fahrenheit in June, and
with parties going on until 7 a.m., you
have to plan your day accordingly.
There are generally two approaches,
depending on your Night Owl Status:
If you enjoy partying all night long and
sleeping through the early afternoon,
whenever you decide to begin your day,
I recommend grabbing a cafe con leche
and a churro or two and hitting one of
Madrid's spectacular museums in the
afternoon.
Begin your day with a walk through
the stunning sculpted gardens of El
Retire Park, not far from the Paseo del
Arte-the name given to Madrid's trio of
world-renowned
museums, the Reina
Soffa (museoreinasofia.es), the Prado
(museodelprado.es), and the ThyssenBornemisza (museothyssen.org).
The
Real Jardin Botanico is also beautiful
and adjacent to the Prado Museum.
If you are strapped for time and
can only visit one of these museums,
I recommend the Reina Soffa, which
holds four floors of Spanish art, mostly
concentrated
around the civil war
and modernist culture, and includes
Picasso's celebrated canvas, 'Guernica.'
Other museums worth your time
and the price of admission include the
Arqueol6gico
Nacional, the Palacio
Real, the CaixaForum museum and
cultural center, and the Naval Museumwhich holds an astounding collection of
naval artefacts from Spain's golden age
ruling the seas throughout the 15th and
TRAVEL
16th centuries.
WHERE TO EAT AND DRINK
Spanish food in summer has a fun and
communal feel. For casual food while out
and about, I recommend walking to the
Plaza Mayor, the biggest square in the
city, where you can and must taste one
of Madrid's signature foods, the Bocata
de Calamares, or calamari sandwich:
fried squid, with just a dash of olive oil,
sandwiched inside fresh-baked bread.
Craving mas comida? A block away
from the Plaza Mayor is the Mercado de
San Miguel, where you can procure the
finest of Madrid's delicacies, from olive
skewers to croquettes to gelato.
For a casual and inexpensive meal
for either lunch or dinner, Yakitoro, a
Japanese-Spanish fusion tavern, has
a menu based around charbroiled
skewers (yakitoro.com). For old world
and traditional
Spanish fare, step
back in time to Botfn Restaurant,
which was founded in 1725 (botin.es/
en). If you're old school like me, take
in dinner and a flamenco show while
in Madrid. I recommend two places
in particular: the Corral de la Morerfa
(corraldelamoreria.com)
and Cafe de
Chinitas
(en.chinitas.com).
The
dancers, singers, and guitarists at
both locations are mesmerizing.
Chinitas is walkable from the center
of the city, although you might need
to hire a taxi if you decide to go to the
Corral; it depends on the location of
your accommodation.
Madrid is a drinking city, and you
must start your night off right with
elegant cocktails and bites at the chic
La Terraza at The Principal Madrid
(theprincipalmadridhotel.com),
but
there are numerous outdoor and
rooftop bars all throughout the city.
WHERE THE GIRLS ARE
Spain is often rated the most
popular gay tourist destination in
Europe by knowledgable bloggers
and guides alike, and for good
reason: From the architecture to the
zapaterias, there's pleasure to be
found on every corner. And there's
no better time of year to go than
June, during Pride. For the single
queer female traveler, take heart in
the fact that the city is as safe as it is
pleasurable. Whether it's 2 a.m. or 2
p.m., I was not catcalled or harassed
once during my time in the cafes,
bars, or walking the streets. The
freedom of movement and sense
of fun one feels in Madrid no doubt
contributes to its popularity with the
queer community.
There are numerous events and
venues for queer women. During
2016 Pride, there were parties every
night, in addition to beloved lesbian
hotspots like Club 33 (club33madrid.
es), the oldest lesbian club in Madrid,
and Truco, a lesbian bar in the center
of Chueca, for queer women to visit.
There's also the Viva Pop Festival,
which is popular with queer and
gender-mixed
crowds. But during
Pride, people don't just party in barsthey're out in the streets. At night
during Pride, the plazas are filled
with people drinking, laughing, and
dancing-together.•
• American tourists can enter Spain and stay without a visa for up to three
months
• Mealtimes are later than in the US,with lunch served between 2 and 4 p.m.,
and dinner served between 9 and 11p.m. or sometimes later
• Spanish cityfolk are night owls: The bar scene and parties do not start jumping
until around 2 a.m. so consider taking an afternoon nap or siesta
• While the culture of the siesta is declining, finding shade indoors during the
afternoon is a must. In the summertime, the sun doesn't set in Madrid until after
10 p.m., so don't worry about losing the day if you take a siesta. The sun always
shines on sunny Madrid and the sky is always blue!
Madrid Pride: (madridorgullo.com/en}
World Pride Madrid: (worldpridemadrid2017.com
Madrid Tourism, LGBT:(esmadrid.com/en/madrid-lgbt}
FEB/MAR
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TLOOK/
CROSSWORD
THE
L-OUIZ
Test your
lesbian knowledge
with our queer crossword.
BY MYLES MELLOR
ACROSS
DOWN
1.
Greek poet(ess) from Lesbos
4
The Price of Salt writer, _
Highsmith
9
Said "I do" together
10 Pulitzer Prize-winning poet,_
St. Vincent Millay
31
1. Country of Queen Christina
28 Stops along the road
2. It's mightier than the sword
30 "Don't move!" to Fido
3
Welcome
32 Resembling
4
Respectively
35 Letters on a pencil
5
Women's activist who had longterm relationship with Mary
Rozet, Jane_
36 Deny entry
38 Negative
6
Email subject line intro
7
Novelist who had relationship
with Edith Lewis, Willa_
First Lady who fell
in love with reporter
Lorena Hickok
8
Lesbian who was New York
State poet laureate, goes with
11across
46
Fur scarf
9
49
Prefix with morphosis
51
Famous '20s actress
who had a lesbian affair
with Mercedes De
Acosta
52
Congresswoman who
made the opening
speech during
Nixon's impeachment
proceedings,_
Jordan
33
Compass direction
34
Maximum degree
36
Writer of Nightwood,
classic of lesbian
fiction, Djuna _
37
Speakeasy performer
and out lesbian in the
1920s, Gladys_
11 See 8 down
13 Collar button
14 "The way" in Chinese
philosophy
15 "Come as you_"
41
16 LGBTactivist in the US who
overturned Section 3 of the
Defense of Marriage Act,_
Windsor
18 Large feather
19 12/24, for one
23 Smallest US state, abbr.
24 Expat American writer who
rote "A rose is a rose is a rose,"
Gertrude
25 Yes in the Senate or Parliament
27 Arts degree
28 Tag player
29 Partner of 24 across
Hers was the first samesex marriage in San
Fran, Del_
English novelist who was the
lover of 20 down
11 Where a small pooch might sit
12 "_ thy fair light had fled;'
Shelley
17 Believer suffix
20 Novelist and garden designer,
Sackville-West
21 New York activist, Barbara_
22 Partner of 31 across, Phyllis
24 Frodo's buddy
25 Took in
26 Barely get, with "out"
78
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2017
39 Zodiac's seventh sign
40 Word before real or lost
42 Boating equipment
43 Dorothy's auntie
44 Shirt's neck shape
45 Experimental area
47 "Just as I thought!"
48 Kilogram, abbr.
50 60 min.
2016 STATEMENT
OF OWNERSHIP
MARKtTPlAC
~
Publication Title: Curve
Publication No.: 0010-355
We love who you are.
Filing Date: Nov 1,2016
Issue Frequency: Bi-monthly
Feb/Mar, Apr/May, Jun/July, Aug/Sep, Oct/ Nov, Dec/Jan
Number of Issues Published Annually: 6
Annual Subscription Price: $35.00
Complete Mailing Address PO Box 467 New York NY 10034.
Contact Person: Silke Bader
Telephone: (415) 871-0569
Publisher: Silke Bader PO Box 467 New York NY 10034
Editor: Merryn Johns PO Box 467 New York NY 10034
Owner(s): Avalon Media LLC PO Box 467 New York NY
10034
Silke Bader PO Box 467 New York NY 10034
Publication Title: Curve
Issue Date for Circulation Data: Nov 24
Extent and Nature of Circulation: Average No.
Copies Each Issue During Preceding 12 Months:
A) Total No. Copies Net Press Run 47,815.B) Paid
Circulation. (By Mail and Outside the Mail) (1)
Mailed Outside-County Paid Subscriptions Stated
on Form 3541: 10,846; (2) Mailed In-County Paid
Subscriptions Stated on Form 3541: 0; (3) Paid
Distribution Outside the Mails Including Sales
_ rough Dealers and Carriers, Street Vendors,
Counter Sales, and Other Paid Distribution outside
USPS:23,258; (4) Paid Distribution by Other
Classes of Mail_ rough the USPS:2003. C) Total
Paid Distribution: 36,107 D) Free or Nominal
Rate Distribution by Mail and Outside the Mail:
(1) Free or Nominal Rate Outside-County Copies
included on Form 3541: 0; (2) Free or Nominal
Rate In-County Copies included on Form 3541: 0;
(3) Free or Nominal Rate Copies Mailed at Other
ONLYONEWOMANCAN
CLOSETHE GATESTO HELL
BUTAT WHATCOST?
Classes Mailed_ rough the USPS 61; (4) Free
or Nominal Rate Distribution Outside the Mail:
10,846. E) Total Free or Nominal Rate Distribution:
10,907. F) Total Distribution 47,014 G) Copies
Not Distributed: 801. H) Total: 47,815.I) Percent
Paid 76.8%. Extent and Nature of Circulation/No.
Copies of Single Issue Published Nearest to Filing
Date A) Total No. Copies Net Press Run: 45,543. B)
Paid Circulation. (By Mail and Outside the Mail) (1)
Mailed Outside-County Paid Subscriptions Stated
on Form 3541: 9756; (2) Mailed In-County Paid
Subscriptions Stated on Form 3541: 0; (3) Paid
Distribution Outside the Mails Including Sales
_ rough Dealers and Carriers, Street Vendors,
Counter Sales, and Other Non-USPS 21,546; (4)
Paid Distribution by Other Classes of Mail_ rough
the USPS:1800. C) Total Paid Distribution: 33,102.
D) Free or Nominal Rate Distribution (by Mail
and Outside the Mail): (1) Free or Nominal Rate
Outside-County as Stated on Form 3541: 0; (2)
Free or Nominal Rate In-County Copies included on
Form 3541: 0; (3) Free or Nominal Rate Distribution
Mailed at Other Classes_ rough the USPS:41; (4)
Free or Nominal Rate Distribution Outside the Mail:
10,946. E) Total Free or Nominal Rate Distribution:
10,987 F) Total Distribution: 44,089 G) Copies
Not Distributed: 813. H) Total: 44,902. I) Percent
Paid: 74%. Publication of Statement of
Ownership: Nov/Dec 2016
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
79
T LOOK/
STARS
Turn Up the Heat
Have a Happy Valentine's Day as Venus in romantic
Pisces and Mars in randy Aries amps up your love meter.
BY CHARLENE LICHTENSTEIN
Lucy Lawlesswas born
on March 29, 1968
PISCES %
%
%
This woman aches for a faithful %
relationship.She is in love with %
love and can't wait to find a %
lovergrrl with whom to share her %
%
dreams of blissful happiness. %
She loves children and avidly %
seeks a partnership with a like- %
minded woman. If you settle in %
%
with a sapphic Pisces,expect %
the pitter patter of little feet %
within the first two years,and %
I don't mean catsl Her optimism %
%
in relationships is often put to %
the test and, while she desires a %
forever, she knows when forever %
simply means for the time being. %
%
ARIES %
%
(Feb 20-March 20)
1/,
Modesty is not a strong suit with 1/,
this gal so don't be surprised if 1/,
1/,
she hangs around the house in 1/,
her undies...or less.But expect 1/,
her usual form to be more 1/,
boxer shorts than lace. The fire 1/,
1/,
of passion will always be there 1/,
but it may be camouflaged in 1/,
flannel. Hey honey, pass the 1/,
beer! Yeah,I love you too. BurpI 1/,
1/,
Make her jealous, nervous or 1/,
unsure and she'll dress in latex or 1/,
zippered black leather for you, 1/,
just to make sure that you notice 1/,
1/,
and still care.
1/,
What a charmer! 1/,
1/,
1/,
1/,
1/,
Charlene
Lichtenstein
is theauthor 1/,
of HerScopes:
A Guide
to Astrology1/,
ForLesbians
(Simon
& Schuster) 1/,
1/,
nowavailable
asanebook. 1/,
(March 21-April 20)
Aries (March 21-April 20)
Leo (July 24-Aug 23)
Sagittarius (Nov 23-Dec 22)
Put some zing in your sex
life by sending secret love
missives designed to get your
special lady hot, bothered
and intrigued. The passion
mounts as weeks of mystery
continue. Will you remain
behind the scenes as you pull
her emotional strings? I doubt
it. "All talk and no action" is
just not your style, Aries.
Lionesses are not only regal
felines, they are also the
most alluring animals. When
you've got it, flaunt it and
when you need it, go get it.
This is no time to sit at home
and wait for a knock on the
door. Get out and prowl. You
never know who's hiding in
the bushes. Ah, but whose
bushes?
Gather your best bosom
buddies and plan a series of
get togethers close to home.
Create an especially convivial
and comfortable collection
of the most interesting,
accomplished and sexy
ladies. So pass around the
gay cheer and see who you
can meet, greet and sweep
off her feet.
Taurus (April 21-May 21)
Virgo (Aug 24-Sept 23)
Capricorn (Dec 23-Jan 20)
Gal pals create unexpected
tumult in your life. Seems
like they want to control
your every move and guide
you to things they want to
do but you may not. Keep
your composure. Taureans
are stubborn sisters who
don't like being handled. But
then again, they love being
handled.
Relationships heat up and
there will be ample time
and energy to make any
liaison great. Earthy Virgos
know what to do and when
to do it. For those seeking a
connection, there is no time
like the present to paint the
town pink and check out new
dyke spots.
You are full of great ideas
and big opinions. Now is
the time to share with those
who can make them realities.
Some of these proposals will
take you far or establish you
as a thinker and orator. But
don't just fan the air. Use that
wonderful mouth of yours
for more interesting and
passionate pursuits.
Libra (Sept 24-Oct 23)
Gemini (May 22-June 21)
Geminis are climbing to the
top of the corporate heap
as they pour soothing oil on
upper management. How
far can you slide and glide
up the food chain? Turns
out you have some powerful
girlfriends who can act as an
advance team. Remember to
spread some of that oil with
those who deserve it.
Cancer (June 22-July 23)
Your long-term plans may
involve some international or
unusual travel. You may have
been in a rut, overworked or
in need of a jolt to increase
your energy. So get moving.
Cancers with the urge to
explore will find hot spots on
which to focus their attention.
(tinyurl.com/HerScopes)
~ And I don't mean WiFi!
80
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
Hard work pays off for Libras
with an agenda and a mind
focused on accomplishing it.
Clear your desk by moving
items from the inbox to your
'out' box. Your efforts will put
you in touch with someone
special who may figure in
your future plans. Love at first
sight? It depends. How sharp
is your eyesight, valentine?
Aquarius (Jan 21-Feb 19)
Aqueerians feel in the fiscal
pink and why not? You have
been carefully cultivating
your money tree and now is a
good time to pluck a few juicy
rubyfruits. While you don't
want to waste any money,
feel free to splurge a little. But
also plant a few money seeds
now to bloom in summer.
Scorpio (Oct 24-Nov 22)
Pisces (Feb 20-March 20)
Your creativity hits a high
now, Scorp. See where your
imagination has the greatest
impact. Anything artistic,
romantic or dramatic will
work. Heck, why not even try
a combination of all three!
Launch a half-baked idea and
watch it cook to a bun-licious
level. You have no barriers to
hold you back from success.
Guppies jump into the social
swim and make a splash this
spring. What is it about you
that seems to be attractive
to anyone you choose?
Maybe it's your boundless
enthusiasm. Maybe it's
your sultry, sexy presence.
Whatever it is, you'll find that
party central is where you
hang your hat.
~
I
l>INAU 261~
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DIRECTV NOW
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Women of
the World
first saw Helen Mirren in a TV rerun of the movie Age of
Consent, which she filmed in Australia in 1969, the same
year as the Stonewall riots. In her first major film role, she
played the feisty, feral, and voluptuous muse of a reclusive artist
who had set up his easel on an island in the Great Barrier Reef. I
remember thinking that the casting folks possibly hoped Mirren
would embody some type of Lolita-esque nymphette, but she
brought a lot more to the role than expected. I still remember her
standing naked in the water, holding a fishing spear and looking
more like a feminist Neptune than a pinup.
It's incredible to think that almost 50 years later Helen Mirren is
still going strong, grabbing top roles as powerful women-she is
adept at playing women of status, whether high-ranking military
personnel or royalty-and awards along with them. For a female
performer, her career longevity is unique in Hollywood, possibly
because she does not confine her talents to the film industry alone.
She has always seemed thoroughly authentic, always herself, and
I
2
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
yet true to whichever character she plays. She never quits, is always
in demand, and she averages several notable roles every year,
decade after decade.
We decided to put Helen Mirren on our cover this issue as a
symbol of feminine fortitude and eternal inspiration at any age.
After the results of the U.S. presidential election, we sure needed
an example of an older woman who is universally admired and
successful! Plus, Mirren recently gifted us her Prime Suspect
protagonist, JaneTennison, to include in the pantheon of characters
we always thought (hoped!) might be gay.
This is our first issue for 2017,and it focuses on the theme of Our
Generations. It's a tribute to older lesbians and to younger queer
women who are furthering the causes of our community. It also
hopes to strike an optimistic note. While 2016 did not deliver the
desired political results to many LBTwomen and feminists, as noted
by Victoria A. Brownworth in her Politics column, "History Deferred,"
we must continue to celebrate and support the women-especially
the older women-who are still in the game. And also the younger
queer women who are changing the game. Welcome, Curve guest
writers Nicole Pacent and Jill Bennett, who share their unique
perspectives this issue on spirituality and love.
Be sure to save the date for ClexaCon (March 3-5) in Las Vegas,
the inaugural media and entertainment convention for LGBTQ
women and allies: It will feature celesbian guests, speakers,
panelists, workshops, reunions, special events, and a film festivalwith a portion of the proceeds benefiting the Trevor Project. This
just might be one of the biggest multigenerational gatherings we've
seen yet.
And since we come out in time for Valentine's Day, I'd like to send
my community of feminists and queer women a Valentine's Day
message: Let's always be "stronger together." It's a borrowed phrase
that might now be lost, but it should not be forgotten.
MERRYNJOHNS
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF
merryn@curvemag.com
'}I @Merryn1
THE BEST-SELLING
LESBIAN
MAGAZINE
•
~OW
TOH~
INSMEULTI~ATE
OR
~sro11
www.curvemag.com
FEB/MAR
2017
FEATURES
28
NAMING OUR DESIRES
A new book of portraits
celebrates the gay and
bisexual women who forged
lesbian identity.
38
AN IMPECCABLE PAIR
Meet the friends who started
bespoke fashion label Kipper
Clothiers.
~2
RAINBOW RUNWAY
The queer fashion revolution
continues, coast to coast.
~8
NICOLE PACENT
The out bi actor reflects on her
spiritual journey.
50
ELDER HOUSING
Where will we live when we are
over the hill?
5~
VIOLET PALMER
Celebrating the career of a
super coach.
56
JILL BENNETT
The out lesbian actor on her
new young romance.
66
IN THE SPIRIT OF SAPPHO
Modern Greece has much to
offer vacationing lesbians.
70
PILGRIMAGE TOP-TOWN
This spot on Cape Cod has
long lured lesbians.
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
3
CONTENTS
FEB/MAR
2017
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
IN EVERYISSUE
4
EDITOR'S NOTE
6
CURVETTES
8
FEEDBACK
10
THE GAYDAR
80
STARS
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
TRENDS
REVIEWS
11 OUT IN FRONT
Meet the community leaders
who are doing us proud. By
Sheryl Kay
24 MUSIC
Always at the top of our play
lists, Melissa Etheridge. By
Kelly McCartney
11 IN CASE YOU MISSED
IT ... LGBT news from across
the country. By OutNews
Global
27 FILMS
Meet Katherine Barrell, the
LGBTally star of hit series
Wynonna Earp. By Dana Piccoli
12 WOMEN WE LOVE
Each issue we pick a lucky lady
with a look and a life to match.
30 BOOKS
From pioneering LGBT icons,
to Hollywood lesbians, to lavender love in the White House.
Feast on history this issue!
13 LESBOFILE
What's new and noteworthy
with our favorite celesbians.
By Jocelyn Voo
VIEWS
16 POLITICS
Deep thoughts and heartfelt
convictions on a different topic
each issue from our contributing politics editor. By Victoria
A. Brownworth
18 ISSUES
Our in-depth look into a hot
button topic affecting queer
women worldwide.
4
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
32 SHORT STORY
Relish this excerpt from the
novel Charity. By Paulette
Callen
36 SEX
Meet one of the great minds
behind high quality lesbian
and queer girl erotica By Yana
Tallon-Hicks
LAST LOOK
78 CROSSWORD
Can you tame our Queer Quiz?
By Myles Mellor
00
I,
'-'
• ';1#
'
~
,
r.,
.... t
YOUCANHELPTHEM
DONATENOW
IFAW.ORG/CURVE
QIFAW
International Fund for Animal Welfare
RONTtCURVETTES
DR.FRANKIEBASHAN
Dr. Frankie Bashan is an LGBT relationships specialist.
After nine years of clinical experience, Dr. Frankie sought
a less formal and more dynamic setting and followed her
passion for connecting people and bringing happiness
into their lives by becoming a professional matchmaker.
Little Gay Book (littlegaybook.com) is the premier
lesbian matchmaking service in the San Francisco Bay
Area, Los Angeles, New York and Hawaii. This issue on
page 20 she provides advice on how to find lasting love.
(drfrankie.com)
curve
THE BEST-SELLING
FEB/MAR
LESBIAN
2017 » VOLUME
MAGAZINE
27 NUMBER
1
PUBLISHER Silke Bader
FOUNDING PUBLISHER Frances Stevens
EDITORIAL
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Merryn Johns
SENIORCOPY EDITOR Katherine Wright
CONTRIBUTINGEDITORS Marcie Bianco, Victoria A.
Brownworth, Lyndsey D'Arcangelo, Anita Dolce Vita,
Sheryl Kay, Gillian Kendall, Dave Steinfeld,
Jocelyn Voo
EDITORIALASSISTANTSAnnalese Davis
OPERATIONS
DIRECTOROF OPERATIONS Jeannie Sotheran
PROOFING
FINBARRTOESLAND
PROOFREADERMarcie Bianco
Finbarr Toesland is a London-based journalist who
specializes in business, technology and economic issues,
with a focus on Africa. Finbarr's work has been published
in Financial Times' publications, The Times of London,
The Huffington Post, Africa Report, The European and
World Politics Review. In this issue, on page 18, Finbarr
looks at the progress of LGBT rights in Nigeria and the
difficulties queer women and lesbians face living openly
in often hostile environments. Follow Finbarr on Twitter
@FinbarrToesland
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EMAIL todd@curvemagazine.com
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MANAGERAnnalese
Davis
CONTRIBUTING WRITERS
Melany Joy Beck, Victoria Bond, Kelsy Chauvin, Jane
Czyzselska, Mallorie DeRiggi, Dar Dowling, Jill Goldstein,
Kristin Flickinger, Sarah Hasu, Kim Hoffman, Alanna
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Sassafras Lowrey, Kelly McCartney, Myles Mellor, Laurie
K. Schenden, Janelle Sorenson, Yana Tallon-Hicks, Lisa
Tedesco, Sarah Toce
CONTRIBUTING ILLUSTRATORS & PHOTOGRAPHERS
Steph Brusig, Erica Camille, Grace Chu, Meagan Cignoli,
Sara Lautman, Syd London, Maggie Parker, Diana Price, B.
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PAULETTECALLEN
Paulette Callen's poems, articles, and short stories have
appeared in small journals, magazines, and anthologies.
For nearly four years, she served as a volunteer staff
member for POWARS(Pet Owners with AIDS Resource
Services) in New York City. After many years as a resident
of Manhattan's Upper West Side she returned, with her
rescued blind Shih Tzu, Lily, to her hometown in South
Dakota, which is where Charity, the first of her four
published novels, is set. Read an excerpt on page 32.
(paulettecallen.com)
GILLIANKENDALL
Gillian Kendall has been writing for Curve since its earliest
days. She is a full-time writer and writing coach, living in
Florida. Her first book, the co-authored How I Became a
Human Being, was the subject of the Oscar-nominated
film, The Sessions. Her second book, Mr. Ding's Chicken
Feet, was a New York Times Notable Book, but filmmakers
stayed away in droves. Currently she's re-revising an
unlikely memoir, Notes from the Stranger's Corridor: A
story of editing, insomnia, and minor mental illness, and
seeking artistic representation like mad. (gilliankendall.org)
CONTACT INFO
Curve Magazine
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LETTERSTO THE EDITOREMAIL letters@curvemagazine.com
Volume 27 Issue 1 Curve (ISSN 1087-867X) is published 6 times
per year (January/February, March/April, May/June, July/August,
September/October, November/December) by Avalon Media, LLC,
PO Box 467, New York NY 10034. Subscription price: $35/year, $45
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Returned checks will be assessed a $25 surcharge. Periodicals
postage paid at San Francisco, CA 94114 and at additional mailing
offices (USPS 0010-355). Contents of Curve Magazine may not
be reproduced in any manner, either whole or in part, without
written permission from the publisher. Publication of the name or
photograph of any persons or organizations appearing, advertising
or listing in Curve may not be taken as an indication of the sexual
orientation of that individual or group unless specifically stated.
Curve welcomes letters, queries, unsolicited manuscripts and
artwork. Include SASE for response. Lack of any representation
only signifies insufficient materials. Submissions cannot be
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Printed in the U.S.
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6
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
WHEN
YOU'RE
IN
LAS
VEGAS,
YOU'RE
ALWAYS
TREATED
WELL.
ESPECIALLY
WHENYOUTREAT
YOURSELF
As one of the top destinations
WHEN
YOU'RE
FEELING
night
you're
out
options
your
including
LOOKING
GOOD,
everything
YOU'RE
best.
the Fashion
Visit
In between
and your
around
the world
up the perfect
gift,
Las Vegas
The Forum
Shops
at Caesars
boasts
stores
and restaurants.
FOR YOUR
TASTEBUDS.
all the
partner
fun
that
are going
hot
Restaurant
spots,
course,
of your trip.
your
inside
meals
Paris Las Vegas
to
you're
here
to take
has numerous
or rejuvenate.
There
like Glow
AND
READY
TO
NIGHT.
it easy
world-class
are over
at Tropicana
or do anything
45 luxurious
spas to choose
or ESPA at Vdara
out
Regardless
of how you choose
stores
of options
to keep you refreshed
but,
spas to help you relax
Las Vegas.
to do Vegas, there
and feeling
are plenty
like you could
do it all over again.
THE
has to
to eat.
From amazing
or check
Whether
from,
REJUVENATED
ON ANOTHER
Las Vegas
has countless
seven anchor
Las Vegas
to want
are sure
for a romantic
and keep you looking
Las Vegas can be one of the most romantic
experiences
Tower
REFRESHED,
is all in Las Vegas.
outfit
your inner shopaholic
Show Las Vegas that
and 250 specialty
A TREAT
from
picking
you need to have a great
need to look and feel your best.
TAKE
or an unexpected
to satisfy
Las Vegas has everything
you could
GOOD.
The best shopping
Whether
for LGBT travelers,
time,
offer,
And
you
dining
in
and unforgettable
Strip
views
and,
The nightlife
for every
IS A LIFESTYLE
There's
you're
ALL
ITS OWN.
in Las Vegas is like no other, with amazing
taste,
from
hip bars like Beauty
Las Vegas to LAX at Luxor - a booming,
at Eiffel
to new Downtown
be memorable
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a party
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sure to have a good
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Bar in Downtown
ultra lounge.
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of
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FINALLY
A GETAWAY
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Visit
LasVegas.com
to book flights,
hotels,
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and more.
RONT /
FEEDBACK
thanks for putting her on the
cover of Curve anyway. I hope
to read more about her in
future issues.
-Mallory Evans, via email
KRISTENSTEWARTKILLS
I couldn't believe my eyes
when I saw last issue and
the story on Kristen Stewart
["Becoming Kristen," V.26#6].
I'm a lifelong Kristen Stewart
fan and I loved your story with
her but seriously, you could
do a whole issue on her. From
Kristen news, to the books she
reads, to the music she listens
to and the places she travels to
for film work, to the awesome
clothes she wears. And all the
movies she's made. There's
been 45 already! Kristen is
everything, all the time! But
THANKS FORTHE MEMORIES
2016, YOU SUCKED
For un unbelievably shitty year,
I really enjoyed the roundup
of 2016 in your Politics
column ["The Year of Living
Tumultuously, V.26#6]. I was
never a huge political person,
but this article put everything
in perspective for me in terms
of events impacting women,
queers, and how a huge
opportunity slipped through
our fingers this year. Yes, there
were high points, but boy did
we lose a lot: people, values ...
and hate won. Already people
have forgotten Pulse, Syria,
and the need for women's
rights. I'm truly afraid for where
this country is headed but I
hope I'll always have Curve to
keep me informed.
-Cathy Rhodes, Hudson, N.Y.
MikePenceWantsTo
TurnYouStraight by
VictoriaA. Brownworth
on curvemag.com
I still cannot understand
why these peopleareso
concernedwith what goes
on 1nthe bedroomsof other
people I don t sit around
wonderingwhat they do
why do they carewhat I
might do Who 1sreallythe
sick personhere?Actually,I
don t evenwonder what
other gay peopledo 1ntheir
bedroom - PamFannon
Fuckall the dumbass
poht1ctans
and their bullshit
LGBTbusiness1sNOT
for poht1c1ans1
Theyhave
NO RIGHTto womens
reproductiveorgans or
anyonessexualonentat1on1
Whatthey DO needto worry
about 1sf1x1ng
this fucked
up country,and all those
1ssues1
- Nessa Campbell
MARRIAGE EQUALITY AND QUEER WOMEN STUDY
Has marriage equality and
the US Presidential election
affected you? We are a team
of university researchers
who want to learn about
how marriage equality and
the election have affected
you and your relationships. If
you are interested, visit
http://bit.ly/2gExC6f to
take our survey or email
studyonma rriage.eq ua Iity@
gmail.com for more
information on our study.
li•i!■:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::=··
WHAT
ISYOUR
REACTION
TOTHE
RESULTS
OFTHE
ELECTION?
44%
HILLARY WAS ROBBED! #NOTMYPRESIDENT
48%
IT FELT LIKE SOMEONE HAD DIED. A SAD DAY FOR LGBT AMERICANS
8%
I VOTED FOR TRUMP, GIVE HIM A CHANCE!
0%
I DON'T CARE, IT WON'T MAKE A DIFFERENCE TO MY LIFE
Send to:
WRITE
Curve
USI
magazine, PO Box 467, New York, NY 10034
Email: letters@curvemagazine.com
8
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FEB/MAR
2017
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GIRL GAYDAR
CELESBIANGOSSIP
1 SHE SAID WHAT?
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
9
TRENDS/
THE GAYDAR
Supergirl's Alex Danvers (Chyler
Leigh) reveals that her adopted
sister Kara isn't the only one with
a secret identity ...
Debi Mazar's continuing role
on Younger as an Orthodox
lesbian Jew, Maggie. Hat tip to
you, Debi, for keeping it real
A lesbian YouTuber
shows her vagina to a
gay male friend who
has never seen one
before, and films his
reaction
Fake news sites claiming
lvanka Trump is actually
a lesbian. Get outta town,
we don't want her I
Pornhub.com
publishes data
suggesting
that straight
female users
are 186 percent
more likely
to search for
"lesbian" porn
than men
What a TrumpPence presidency
will mean for
LGBT Americans:
conversion
therapy is just the
beginning ....
Desert
Hearts, the
first lesbian
movie to
have a happy
ending turns
30
l
Veronicas singer Jess
Origliasso makes a
passionate plea for
the Safe Schools antibullying program in
Australia
Lesbian Pizzal Lesbian-owned
Pizzeria Paradiso in D.C.is sharing
25th anniversary specials and a
warm place for LGBTs
10
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FEB/MAR
2017
Bachelor
Australia
contestants
Megan and
Tiffany keep
their romance
secret for 5
months before
going public.
How'sthat'
The New York Post
"for clicks" video about
NYC Sirens lesbian
motorcycle club that
delivers donor breast
milk to babies who
need it. Go, Sirens!
Taiwan's first female head of state
supports marriage equality and MPs are
working on three same-sex marriage
bills, one of which could be passed soon
TRENDS/
NE
MARIA GIRALT
>>Spain
Problem Solver
When there's a need, Maria Giralt finds a way. In fact,
she doesn't just discover a solution-she
creates it.
In the late 1970s, Giralt, a native Catalan from
Barcelona, met up with her first group of gay men, but
there were no groups for women in Spain at that time,
so Giralt decided to start her own. The Collective de
Lesbianas provided a safe place for gay women to socialize, discuss political struggles, and escape from the verbal
abuse they often encountered just by walking down the
street. While Gira It says the women were sometimes
physically attacked as well, they fought back.
"Normally, we'd win;' she says with a smile. "And then
we run, really really fast."
About eight years ago, she was considering the lack
THE
SAN
ANTONIO
FOUR,
WHO
IN1997WERE
WRONGLY
CONVICTED
OF
SEXUALLY
MOLESTING
GIRLS
aged 7 and 9, were exonerated one day before Thanksg1v1ng
2016. Elizabeth Ramirez, Kristie Mayhugh, Cassandra Rivera
and Anna Vasquez, who were the subject of the documentary
"Southwest of Salem," were declared innocent by the Texas
Court of Criminal Appeals after a long process of trying to clear
their names and records. "These defendants have won the right
to proclaim to the cItIzens of Texas that they did not commit a
crime," ruled Judge David Newell. "These women have carried
that burden. They are innocent. And they are exonerated."
of fashion in intimate apparel created specifically for
lesbians, and once again decided she'd solve the problem
on her own. "This was my way of saying ... we exist!" she
• MARIELA
CASTRO
LEADS
LGBT
explains. So she got together with artists Elisabeth Sabala
Cuba after decades of
persecution, and following the
death of Fidel Castro, Cuba's
LGBTcommunity finds renewed
inspiration in her, the charismatic
daughter of President Raul
Castro and a member of Cuba's
National Assembly. She uses
her passion and pedigree to
promote acceptance in the face
of prejudice and was the subject
of a recent HBO documentary,
Castro is expected to continue
to spread a message of equality
across the country in 2017.
and Valerie Prot and designed her own line of women's
underwear, in femme and butch versions imbued with
desire and sensuality. Inspired by the innovative fashion
show called Bread and Butter, Gira It borrowed the
slang Spanish word for lesbian, bollera, and named her
company Bolla and Butter. Today, not only does she sell
several styles of the lingerie, she also offers fun items like
feather-lined handcuffs, bath foam, candles, and more
(bolloandbuttershop.com).
It would have been easy for
Gira It to stop there, but a few years ago she began to
notice the lack of LGBTQ programming on Spanish TV.
And so, once again, she answered the call and founded
Gayles.TV,a robust on line channel offering an exciting
array of content-from
entertainment to health topics to
politics and more (and yes, you can click the option for
English subtitles).
Spain is a unique country when it comes to gay rights,
Gira It says. It was the first predominantly Catholic country
to permit gay marriage, and since 2013 there is legislation
on the books forbidding homophobia in employment
• ZALES
JEWELERS
CAME
UNDER
attack from right-wing group One
Million Moms for a 30-second
TV commercial depicting lesbian
brides among other happy
couples celebrating their love
with diamonds. According to the
group, the discount diamond
dealers are "glorifying sin" and
should pull the ad from TV.
and housing. But life is not perfect. "Prejudice here is
subtle," notes Giralt. "We may have laws, but society has
not changed its mentality, especially when it comes to
misogyny, sexism, transgender or even immigrant rights.
OUTNEWS
GLOBAL
• SHANIQUE
SANDERS,
WHO
WAS
a 23-year-old black lesbian
"stud" was found lying in
the street in Pittsburgh on
November 30. She had at
least one gunshot wound
and was pronounced dead at
hospital. Police are looking for
five suspects who were seen
fleeing the scene. Pghlesbian,
Pittsburgh's LGBTblog,
interviewed local LGBTactivist
Amber Sloan who was a friend
and mentor to Shanique. Sloan
said there's a lack of resources
and support for young studs
in Pittsburgh and has noticed
recent increased violence
against queer women of color.
• ASOUTH
AFRICAN
LESBIAN
was assaulted, abducted from
her home near Cape Town
in December and shot dead.
More than 55 percent of LGBT
South Africans fear they will
experience discrimination or
violence according to a report
released by Love Not Hate
Campaign.
The fight is not only for lesbian rights, but for all people
who are oppressed:' - By Sheryl Kay
FEB/MAR
2017
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11
TRENDS/
GOSBIp
LESBOFILE
IT'S MOSTLY ABOUT COMING OUT, LOUDLY AND PROUDLY.
BY JOCELYN VOO
• SOMETHING TO SCREAM ABOUT
Sometimes there's drama when a celeb comes out, and sometimes it's said in 140 characters
or less. Scream star Bex Taylor-Klaus, who has played several queer characters in her career,
and had also previously denied being a lesbian in a 2013 Facebook post, finally chose to
tweet, "hello my name is bex and yes the rumors are true I am v gay" right before a YouNow
livestream chat with fans. The reason for her declaration? The 2016 election. "Part of why I'm
coming out is because there's so much hate and fear in and around the LGBT community
right now and it's important for us not to halt progress out of fear," she said in her livestream.
In light of so many expressions of hate, what better reason than to share love?
• THIS IS MUSIC TO OUR EARS
Another woman to stand up and come out due to the election: girl group Fifth Harmony's
Lauren Jauregui. But unlike Taylor-Klaus's revelation, Jauregui's was a little more verbose.
The singer posted a letter on Billboard.com lambasting Trump supporters, calling them
racist, sexist, xenophobic and hypocritical-and those are among the nicer things she said.
She also stated how she is proud to be a bisexual Cuban-American woman. "I am grateful
and will continue to speak on behalf of the women around the world and in our very own
country who do not experience a fraction of that respect because of the color of their skin
or what they choose to wear, or how their hair looks, or how much makeup they have on or
any other absurdity that we women are reduced to," she wrote. Preach!
• THERE'S ONE IN EVERY FAMILY?
The Duggar family isn't unfamiliar with fame-or infamy. The giant family starred in 19 Kids
& Counting for seven years until its discontinuation in 2015 when it was revealed that the
eldest son, Josh, had molested five girls, including his younger sisters. But now the rumor
mill has its eyes on Jana Duggar, the eldest daughter, who also happens to be the only girl
who's single. Fans have expressed their concern at the lack of romance in her life. Could
she be lesbian? Earlier this year Duggar explained, "There have been different guys come
along and ask but they haven't been, I don't know, the right one. I'm not just out to get
married to the first one that comes along." Even with no evidence, there's whispers that
maybe, just maybe, she's one of us. Guess we'll wait and see.
• AMAZING ABBY, HOW SWEET THE SOUND
Now seems like the time when we could use a little love. Christian mom blogger and
author Glennon Doyle Melton, who recently divorced her husband of 14 years, revealed
that she's dating FIFA World Cup champion Abby Wambach, who at the time was only
two months separated from her wife Sarah Huffman. At press time all seems well. "What I
need you to know-and what I know you need to know-is that I am deeply, finally, FINE,"
Melton wrote on Facebook. "Fine through my bones and soul and mind and just every
fiber of me ... l have officially become a woman who knows who she is and refuses to
betray herself. So anyway. What I'm trying to say is. PRECIOUSWORLD: I LOVE ABBY.I'm
so happy. Love Wins." Full stop.
FEB/MAR
2017
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TRENDS/SHE
SAID
"The
devastating
results hit the LGBT
community particularly hard
because we are unique in spanning
all the demographic groups targeted
by the president-elect throughout his
campaign. We are Latino, Black, women,
Muslims, undocumented and we have
d isabi Iities."
-Aisha C. Moodie-Mills for
victoryfund.org
"By a slim
margin, this nation
has elected a demagogue
who trafficked in bigotry, stoked
racist hatred and normalized
misogyny ...We are about to be tested
as never before, and speaking for
myself, and NCLR, we will not stand
down, sit idle or be silent in the face
of oppression, bullying or threat."
-Kate Kendell for NCLR
14
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2017
16 HISTORYWITHOUT HILLARY
18 OUR SISTERSIN NIGERIA
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
15
History De/erred
What the defeat of Hillary Clinton means for women, and for history.
BY VICTORIA
A. BROWNWORTH
A few days before Thanksgiving, Hillary
Clinton was in a bookstore in Rhode Island
with her family. The bookseller, Jessica
Wick, took a selfie with Hillary and then
posted a message on Facebook:
"I wasn't as eloquent as I'd have liked to be.
I didn't want to take her & her family out
of their day together. I also didn't want to
cry; I feel like strangers crying at one might
detract from one's day. I'd have liked to tell
her I was a poet in ardent support of what
she stood and stands for. I'd have liked to
tell her how, at that very bookstore, behind
the very same counter she approached
to ask about a book, I listened to her
concession speech with two of my coworkers and we cried; how in that same
spot customers and employees have
talked about her with regret and hope.
I'd have liked to tell her something which
encompasses the sadness I feel that she
did not win, but somehow tell her that in a
16
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2017
way which didn't rub salt in any wounds. I'd
have liked to give her something."
Wick did speak eloquently. Her words
articulated what so many women were
thinking and feeling in the days and weeks
following the biggest political upset in
American presidential history.
I began covering the presidential
campaign in April 2015, when Hillary Clinton
became the first Democrat and Sen. Ted
Cruz (R-TX)became the first Republican to
announce their presidential candidacies.
As this magazine's senior political editor,
I wrote at least one column a week about
the campaign, in addition to the pieces I
wrote for other newspapers. Between April
2015 and November 2016, I wrote several
hundred columns and nearly 50,000
tweets about the election. I watched every
debate and town hall for both Democrats
and Republicans and watched events with
third-party candidates Gary Johnson and
Jill Stein. I watched every minute of the
Republican National Convention on TV
and I attended the Democratic National
Convention, reporting and live-tweeting
daily.
For 19 months, I lived and breathed
the election. During most of the primary
season, I was still standing on the sidelines,
attempting neutrality: There were things I
liked about Bernie Sanders; there were
things I didn't like about Hillary.
But when the primaries ended and
Sanders refused to concede, despite a
deficit of 4 million votes, 1,000 delegates,
and 11contests, I ceased to be any kind of
bystander. I've covered elections for more
than two decades.
I've been a feminist since the day I stood
up to a nun in grade school and told her
women should be able to be priests, too.
I know the damage men who don't get
their way can do to women, no matter
how accomplished the women and how
VIEWS/
mediocre the men. When Hillary began
homing in on the GOP, Sanders was still
lashing out at Democrats. And her.
I began to worry then about the general
election, but the part of me with hope, the
part of me that had borne witness to Hillary
Clinton's remarkable passage and growth
through American politics over the past
40 years, remained stalwart: Of course
she would win the presidency. During my
lifetime, no one had worked harder for
it, and no one was more qualified for the
position. First Lady Michelle Obama gave
stirring speeches about "our friend Hillary:'
Everyone I knew was a Hillary supporter. A
Trump presidency seemed inconceivable.
The photos said it all on election night
and the morning after: pictures of women
of all races, ages, and ethnicities crying,
hugging one another, all in stunned
disbelief. After nearly two years of one
of the most grueling and vituperative
presidential election cycles in modern
times, it was over. Hillary Clinton had
lost the Electoral College vote to Donald
Trump.
We were dumbstruck and gobsmacked
and gutted.
How could this brilliant, hard-working,
savvy, compassionate, beautiful champion
for our rights-as women, as LGBTs, as
immigrants; as the disabled, the poor, the
working poor, the middle class; as whites,
blacks, Latinas, Asians, Native Americansnot be our president-elect? How could
a woman who spends her free time in
bookstores be supplanted by a man who
brags he doesn't read because he "doesn't
have to"?
Over the ensuing weeks, Hillary's vote
lead grew. At press time, she was more than
2.7 million votes ahead of Donald Trump,
the president-elect. At Thanksgiving,
computer scientists and political pollsters
of long standing began to cite problems
with the vote count in three states:
Wisconsin, Michigan, Pennsylvania. There
was pressure to audit the vote, pressure
on the long-outmoded, slavery-protecting,
18th-century anachronism of the Electoral
College that never envisioned the day
when 81 percent of Americans would be
living in cities and people of color would
comprise a third of the voting populacewomen more than half.
I sobbed in the days after the election.
During Hillary's concession speech I was
crying out loud, mourning for all I saw lost
in that speech. I felt as if my heart would
break. I shall never comprehend how
Hillary stood there dry-eyed, her voice
strong and unwavering, as she delivered
the most terrible words of her 40-year
political career. It showed her as the
stateswoman that she was born to be. That
she worked to be. That she will now never
be.
My wife doesn't cry. She gets angry.
For days she stormed around our house
ranting about the demographics of the
vote, as they became known.
We live in a black neighborhood in a
majority-POC city. We are the token white
people in our own lives. So everyone
we know voted for Hillary. And the
demographics showed it.
A full 94 percent of black women
voted for Hillary, 68 percent of Latinas, 69
percent of millennials. But only 43 percent
of white women.
I had known all along that GOP
women wouldn't vote for Hillary. But that
Democrats-progressives-would
vote for
Trump? That I never imagined. Nor did the
pollsters.
Black women were furious. White
women had sold them out for white
privilege. I spoke to women who voted
for Trump, including some lesbians. It
was disheartening. They were concerned
about about ISIS, about having their guns
taken away. They thought Hillary was
dishonest. They thought she was a baby
killer who would agree to abortions on the
last day of gestation. They thought she
might be a lesbian involved with a Muslim
spy-her aide of 20 years, Huma Abedin.
We heard about fake news and how the
majority of those stories targeted Hillary.
We wondered why the press and Google,
Facebook and Twitter, told us after the
election.
There has not been a day since the
election that I have not ached for what was
lost. Our first female president. The only
competent candidate. Watching Trump
roll out his cabinet picks-every one of
them racist, misogynist, anti-LGBT-was
infuriating and terrifying in equal measure.
Clinton had promised a 50 percent female,
40 percent non-white cabinet, reflecting
her own staff, reflecting America. We shall
never have that.
I'm in my 50s. So is my wife. So are most
of our closest friends. It is unlikely we will
see a woman president in our lifetime.
POLITI
Other women may run, but they won't
have Clinton's expertise or the ability to
withstand relentless misogyny. It took 240
years for America to nominate a woman on
a major-party ticket. In every poll, she was
expected to win. But when many peoplemost of them white (a mere 31 percent
of white men voted for Clinton)-got into
the voting booth, their fear overtook their
sense.
Why women vote against themselves
and one another has been studied: Women
distrust women in power because there
are so few role models, and they don't
recognize women as capable of leading.
There is an element of jealousy. There is an
element of internalized misogyny. Of selfloathing.
Black women were able to set those
things aside. Why weren't white women?
Why weren't white lesbians? How could
any woman vote for a self-declared sexual
predator when each of us knows at least
one woman, if not ourselves, who has
been the victim of sexual assault? How
could any woman vote for a man whose
main campaign theme was racism and
hate? Whose vice presidential pick funded
conversion therapy for LGBTsand passed a
law in Indiana, when he was the governor,
that women had to hold funerals for their
aborted fetuses?
I will likely not live to see a woman
president. Hillary Clinton was the most
qualified woman we had to offer. And after
working her way up the political ladder for
40 years, she was challenged by two men
with incredibly slender resumes. Who will
take her place? Elizabeth Warren, who
is the same age as Clinton but has only
been in political office for six years and
was a Republican until 2000? Gov. Nikki
Haley (R-SC), who is 25 years younger
than Warren and may become Trump's UN
ambassador? She is a woman of color but
has far-right-wing views. Kamala Harris,
the former attorney general of California,
newly elected to the Senate in 2016? She
mirrors Hillary in many ways but is 15 years
younger and black.
We can't know who will rise. We do
know that it took Hillary Clinton 40 years of
being outspoken-making waves, making
history, making change-to get close. We
know that there will always be women who
fear other women in power more than they
fear men. We know that in 2016 history was
deferred. We do not know for how long.•
FEB/MAR
2017
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17
i -:.
..,
1\~, \\
' ...~a-''-'--'-...-<.&..1
Moving
IOwards
LGB1
Righlsin
Nigeria
1
7
Activists in the African
nation struggle for equality
against a tide of violence.
BY FINBARR TOESLAND
18
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FEB/MAR
2017
__
......._______
~---
Not a week goes by without a news
report detailing yet another vicious attack
on members of Africa's LGBT population.
These hate crimes are not confined to just
a few African countries but can be found
across the continent, even in progressive
South Africa.
Although in 2006 South Africa became
the first, and to this day is the only, African
nation to legalize same-sex marriage,
so-called corrective rapes have become
prevalent. Rapes and other violent crimes
are not uncommon in South Africa,
however, corrective rapes specifically
target lesbians in an attempt to change their
sexuality; the attackers believe victims will
be "fixed" by the rape and become straight.
Gangs of men usually commit these crimes
and often transmit AIDS and other diseases.
But lesbians who live in Johannesburg's
affluent Sandton neighborhood will have a
drastically different experience from those
who inhabit one of Cape Town's townships.
Lesbians in poorer South African townships
bear the brunt of these assaults and then
are left to fend for themselves due to the
lack of police-or to the prejudice they face
when reporting their injuries.
Recently, the West African nation of
Nigeria overtook South Africa to become
the largest economy on the continent.
Nigeria has become a major economic
power: But this rapid financial development
has not been matched by progress toward
social equity for the LGBT community.
Being out and open in Nigeria is extremely
difficult due to the many social, political,
and economic barriers, but courageous
lesbian organizations that aim to address
sexual and reproductive health concerns
are emerging in the country.
Akudo Oguaghamba, executive director
of the Women's Health and Equal Rights
Initiative (WHER), is at the forefront of
the call for equal rights for Nigeria's
LGBT citizens. "In the wake of the antihomosexuality crusade, there have been
a lot of push-backs in advocacy efforts.
VIEWS/
These negative reactions also toughened
up LGBT activists in these areas, as our
worst fears became reality and we are left
with no other choice than to be strong and
determined;' explains Oguaghamba.
"In Nigeria, after the Same Sex Marriage
Prohibition Act was enacted, a great deal of
awareness was raised around LGBT rights
and what it means to be a homosexual. We
have continued to educate the Nigerian
people carefully to understand that we are
humans too and deserve to reach our full
potential, regardless of sexual orientation
and gender identity."
While the LGBT rights movement over
the past few decades has achieved a great
deal of success in Western countries, the
same cannot be said in Africa. There is no
simple answer as to why gay rights in Africa
have been so hard to attain, but the roots of
modern-day homophobia in many African
countries can be traced back to the impact
of colonialism. Many of the 19th century
British anti-sodomy laws were exported
to the African countries that were part of
the then British Empire, leaving a legacy
of homophobia that has been difficult to
erase.
Zimbabwe's controversial president,
Robert Mugabe, has scapegoated gays and
lesbiansfor a range of problems the country
is dealing with, has called homosexuality
"un-African," and has even claimed that
colonists brought over this "immoral
culture:' Of course, homosexuality is far
from a colonial import and there is evidence
dating back thousands of years showing
that in Africa, as in anywhere else in the
world, homosexuality is an intrinsic part of
human history. For example, ancient cave
paintings by the San people of Zimbabwe
depict homosexuality, and Sudan's Zande
tribe saw lesbianism practiced.
Comments like those made by Mugabe
sound outrageous and unbelievable,
but unfortunately these views are widely
held. A poll conducted by NOIPolls in
partnership with The Initiative for Equal
Rights (TIERs)and the Bisi Alimi Foundation
in 2015 discovered that anti-gay sentiment
in Nigeria is very high. One of the most
disturbing findings was that 90 percent
of Nigerians agreed with the statement
"Nigeria would be a better country without
homosexuals" and 87 percent had the
opinion that "homosexuals should be
imprisoned for 14 years for having a same-
sex relationship or living together:'
Nigeria's economic ascent, paired with
stunning natural scenery, has made the
country a promising travel destination.
Nevertheless, lesbophobia is still a major
concern for visitors traveling to Nigeria and
has the potential to deter members of the
LGBT community from experiencing this
diverse nation.
"Because same-sex marriage, samesex relationships, and LGBT organizing
are criminalized in Nigeria, it is important
for lesbians traveling through Nigeria to
refrain from indulging in activities that
will publicly brand them as lesbians;' says
Oguaghamba. In some parts of Africa, the
situation might be anecdotally different,
but the lived experiences end up being
the same. I would advise that any lesbian
traveling to any country in Africa consult
the people on the ground to understand
their context and also to have support on
the ground."
Rather than endorsing LGBT rights,
Nigeria's president, Goodluck Jonathan,
recently signed the Same-Sex Marriage
Prohibition Bill, which represents a
considerable setback. This draconian
piece of legislation not only outlaws samesex marriage but also makes it a criminal
offense for same-sex couples to publicly
display affection and to carry out LGBT
advocacy. Some countries, including
the United Kingdom, have threatened
to cut aid to countries that actively
discriminate against gay people. However,
proclamations by Western nations calling
for gay rights further propagate the widely
held notion that homosexuality is a Western
import.
President Barack Obama's vocal
support for LGBT rights on his 2015 visit
to Kenya and Ethiopia also generated
a defensive reaction from those on the
continent who believe that the US is
attempting to impose its cultural values
on Africa.
"Change has to come from within
African societies and be led by Africans.
This is why it is so important to publicize,
support, and empower African LGBT
activists. Training for African journalists
in LGBT issues would help reduce media
homophobia, which often stirs hate and
violence," says Peter Tatchell, a human
rights campaigner and the director of
the Peter Tatchell Foundation. "Churches
ISS
also need to speak out against the
victimization of LGBT people, which is
often driven by religiously motivated
prejudice."
Africans themselves are the only ones
able to reverse anti-gay laws and change
public opinion; however, this battle
for basic rights is monumental. It is
extraordinarily difficult for African LGBT
activists to openly campaign for equal
rights, as they are being targeted and
their cause is being sensationalized by
the media and homophobic mobs.
The Ugandan weekly tabloid Rolling
Stone published photographs of 100 gay
Ugandans in 2010, under the headline
"Hang Them." One of the people named
in the article and pictured on the front
page was David Kato, a prominent
human rights activist who had received
a number of death threats before the
report was published. A few months
after being named, Kato was beaten to
death with a hammer in his home.
Clearly, this environment discourages
many Africans from speaking out in
favor of LGBT rights, and the situation is
deteriorating. "In most African countries,
anti-LGBT attitudes have worsened, and
in Nigeria, Gambia, Cameroon, and
Uganda, legal repression has intensified.
This has hit all LGBT people, but lesbians
have suffered particularly badly by being
subjected to the brutality of corrective
rape," says Tatchell. "There is much
ignorance, fear, and hate toward lesbians
in Africa. Men feel especially threatened
by lesbian [and straight] women who
have broken away from the shackles of
often patriarchal traditional cultures."
At the moment,
it may seem
impossible to overcome such pervasive
problems and for gays and lesbians
to live openly and freely, but the will
of LGBT people in Africa remains
strong. "There is hope-we have seen
tremendous organizing and coming out
by gay and lesbian people in countries
where even such deplorable conditions
exist, such as Egypt and Ethiopia. There
is strong organizing in East and Southern
Africa, which is a strong beacon that selforganizing, self-determination
by gay
and lesbian Africans may indeed change
the tide," concludes Denis Nzioka, a
leading sexual and gender minorities
activist based in Kenya.•
FEB/MAR
2017
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19
ADVICE»
L
The
_Dating
Decode
You can find your perfect
match with this simple advice
BY DR. FRANKIE BASHAN
20
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
et's face it. Single lesbians
are terrible at dating.
As a professional lesbian
matchmaker, I've worked
with hundreds of women who are
seeking The One, and I've heard their
idea of a perfect mate described to me
again and again: "My perfect match has
a great sense of humor; likes adventure,
travel, and fun; but is also down to
earth. She's reasonably fit, emotionally
intelligent, and financially secure.
She's supportive but independent,
responsible but spontaneous, and is
open to a healthy, loving, long-term
relationship."
Great! But then I'm immediately
asked, "Where is she? Does she even
exist? Am I asking too much?" The
good news is, the woman you want to
meet is out there waiting to meet you.
So why haven't you found her yet?
Many of us are conditioned to believe
that with no effort on our part (or very little),
our life partners will just fall into our laps.
Any sort of "plan" to find a partner feels
contrived, transactional, and decidedly
unromantic. We passively leave the biggest
part of our happiness to chemistry, chance,
and the universe, while we concentrate on
our jobs, our routines, and everything that's
comfortable and keeps us occupied.
In 2009, when I started my lesbian dating
service, the Little Gay Book, I listened to
women express the same dating struggles:
They're too busy; they're uncertain as to
where the women are; their type of woman
is impossible to find; they have no idea how
to date successfully; they believe all other
lesbians have baggage, and so on. I saw a
significant need for a system to help women
meet one another, maybe get out of their
comfort zones and actually connect faceto-face. Through my experience working
VIEWS/
with single lesbians, I've learned the most
common dating problems among them.
Dating is a numbers game. It takes
seven dates with seven different women
to meet one you actually connect with.
That's right. Seven. If you're serious about
finding Her, dating requires making time
in your schedule for dinners, coffees, and
drinks with strangers, so that you can
begin to find out who they really are. If
every hour of every day is filled with work
or other obligations, you're not going to
have the time (or the energy) to truly focus
on getting to know another individual. And
isn't that what you expect from someone
who is going on a date with YOU?
Dating is not U-Hauling. The polar
opposite of the woman who has no time
to meet the "right" woman is the one
who meets, melds, and moves in with the
"right now" woman. Instant monogamy
might protect us from being alone, but
when we choose convenience over true
compatibility, it doesn't last. Eventually we
break up and we're devastated. Then, we
either repeat the cycle with the next "right
now" woman, or build walls around our
hearts and bemoan the fact that there are
no quality women out there.
Dating isn't really about dating. It's
about you. I can't tell you how many women
I've consulted with who have a laundry list
of traits they're looking for in a partner,
but have given almost no thought to what
they are offering. We all want to be loved
for who we genuinely are, but let's face it:
we can all be better versions of ourselves.
Some improvements are quick and easy.
Try a new hairstyle, update your wardrobe,
take up a new activity or a hobby. If you're
out of shape, start exercising. If you're out
of the loop, take time to read more. In
short, spruce up your house before inviting
someone into it.
Dig deeper. Some self-improvements
aren't as simple as a cool haircut or a
new jacket. Old issues are not going to
solve themselves. In many of the women
I've worked with, I've recognized a need
for therapy, or a serious realignment of
expectations. If you're still carrying around
old baggage, set it down for good through
therapy or self-help. Admitting you have
issues is not the end of the world. Showing
that you're working on them is much more
attractive than being in denial. A great
partner cannot repair your lack of trust,
dissolve your fear of intimacy, or help you
get over your ex. It's not her job to fix you.
And she can't, even if she wants to.
Forgive your exes. If you're still
struggling with old guilt, sadness, or just
a general malaise about your ex, the best
thing you can do for the health of your
future romantic relationships is to forgive
her-not for her sake, but for yours. Write
her a letter, call her, meet her in person (or
only in your mind and heart), and say, "I
forgive you for hurting me." Making peace
with your past and releasing resentment
will open your heart to a whole new world
of possibilities. Besides, talking about your
ex during a first date is a well-known way to
kill a potential second date.
Stop questioning and start asking. The
two questions single lesbians ask me most
frequently are: "How do I know if she's a
lesbian?" and "How do I approach her?"
A woman's hair, nails, clothes, politics, or
playlist are not going to clue you in to her
romantic preferences. The only way you're
going to find out if she dates women is
by talking to her. Be bold-tell her she's
attractive, compliment her on something.
There's nothing wrong with giving another
woman a compliment. If she starts talking
to you, you've opened the door to learning
what you want to know about her.
"I've tried everything you're saying,
and nothing works." When I hear my
clients say this, I recommend that they
see a dating coaching. Is there something
in your expectations, in your beliefs about
love and relationships, or in your dating
patterns that is keeping you from meeting
someone? A dating coach will help you
gain honest, unbiased insight and the kind
of clear guidance that your best friends
simply can't offer.
The Dating Decode.
I've taken
everything I've learned over the past 15
years in my therapy practice, in my oneon-one dating and relationship coaching,
and in my work as a matchmaker to
develop a step-by-step system to help
women find solid matches with the highest
probability of long-term success. Every
woman deserves love-righteous, healthy
love. That is why I've devoted my career
to helping women navigate the lesbian
dating world, and to giving them the tools
they need to find lasting, meaningful, and
healthy relationships. We should expect
nothing less.•
ADVI
DR.FRANKIE'S
LESBIANDATING
TOOLS
The Dating Decode: My new,
comprehensive program uses dual
methodologies in psychology and
matchmaking, and women can utilize
it on their own. This step-by-step
program will not only teach you
how to find love, but how to keep it.
(thedatingcode.com)
Little Gay Book: Available in the San
Francisco Bay Area, Los Angeles, San
Diego, New York, Boston and Hawaii.
Specializing in lesbian and bisexual
matchmaking, our database contains
thousands of women who have been
thoroughly vetted, screened, and
selected specifically for you.
Lesbian Speed Dating: Hosted by a
trained relationship consultant, these
lively events focus on single women
meeting and getting to know up to 12
others, all within 90 minutes.
Lesbian Table for Six: Our newest
lesbian dating offering. A relaxed
dinner party in a local restaurant,
with personal introductions by our
matchmaker. We populate the dinner
table with fun, liked-minded women
from our singles database. They'll be
just your type.
Wing Woman: Exactly what it sounds
like, and exactly what you need: An
outgoing woman accompanies you
to an event, facilitates introductions,
gives pointers, and acts as your
coach, teammate and cheerleader,
all in one.
Professional Coaching: Focused.
Specific. Effective. These short-term
sessions help shift your thinking
patterns, recognize obstacles, and
get you on the path toward a loving
relationship.
YouTube Channel and Blog: Packed
with advice, answers to common
questions, and actionable tips for
every dating situation. My blog has
even more content about surveys,
sex, support, and single-hood.
Learn more about Dr. Frankie
and her suite of dating tools at
littlegaybook.com.
FEB/MAR
2017
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................................................................................................................................................................
.
BEA
PART
OF
THE
CURVE
MYSTERY
MOVIE
WHAT'S YOUR ALL-TIME FAVORITE LGBTQ FILM? WHO'S YOUR FAVORITE LESBIAN, Bl OR QUEER FILM STAR?
DO YOU HAVE A QUEER SERIES YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT?
NOMINATE YOUR TOP PICKS AT CURVEMOVIES.COM
IN THE FOLLOWING CATEGORIES:
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THE WINNING FEATURE FILM WILL BE SCREENED AS THE CURVE MYSTERY MOVIE DURING THE CLEXACON
FESTIVAL ON MARCH 5, 2017 AT BALLY'S LAS VEGAS HOTEL & CASINO, 3645 S LAS VEGAS BLVD.
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................................................................................................................................................................
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26
THE MAKING OF MADONNA
27 FILM FANDOM FUN
28LESBIANSIN HISTORY
FEB/MAR
2017
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23
To keep herself delighted, our eternally favorite
rocker revisits her musical roots.
BY KELLY MCCARTNEY
"If you look back to history, you'll see
how they all came from the same place,"
Melissa Etheridge says, explaining the
myriad roots of American music. "They all
came from the same musical movement in
the South, from Appalachian music to the
blues coming out of the freed slaves in the
early 19th century, and how they all mixed
together and became the different genres:'
Etheridge recently released MEmphis
Rock and Soul, a collection of classic
Southern soul songs that finds her digging
into the Stax Records catalogs of her heroes' heroes. "When you get down to it, you
realize, Oh, Janis Joplin and Robert Plant
and Mick Jagger were all listening to Otis
Redding. They were hearing Sam and Dave
and going, 'I want to sing like that!' Those
24
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FEB/MAR
2017
were the artists who influenced me, so it's
like getting back to that seed:'
MEmphis Rock and Soul is the 14th studio album that Etheridge has made over
the span of nearly 30 years, and it sounds
like pure joy. "It was really amazing, probably some of the most fun I've had;' she
says of the recording process, "because I
got out of myself, out of my regular writing
in my head, and the personal stuff, to jump
inside other songs, a musical project-to
go down to Memphis and immerse myself
in the feeling and the people and the musicians and the history. Then, coming out
with horns and background vocals and everything, it was delightfully fun."
To really do it right, Etheridge did indeed
head to the mecca of Southern soul to re-
cord at Willie Mitchell's Royal Studios with
a stellar backing band anchored by the
Hodges Brothers and with vintage gear including one of Al Green's legendary ribbon
microphones. By doing so, she claimed her
place in a music lineage that includes Otis
Redding, Rufus Thomas, the Staple Singers, William Bell, and many more. "I felt so
welcomed, so brought in;' she offers. "The
thing that always struck me so beautifully
about Stax was the interracial thing. It just
didn't matter what color you were. They
were just making the music that they loved.
It didn't matter, the color of my skin. There
I am. Love:'
Even so, Etheridge wasn't blind to the import of making this music amid the issues
of the world. With all that's going on polit-
REVIEWS/
ically and socially, including racial issues
being at a melting point, it was important
for her to revisit these tunes and give them
a new voice. "As I felt drawn to this project,
I really felt those issues rise to the surface;'
she says. "They've always been underneath
there, bubbling. Really, to see them rise
to the surface, it put special meaning to a
song like 'Respect Yourself.'"
For Etheridge's updated version of this
decades-old anthem, she recruited singer-songwriter Priscilla Renea to "help me
make this a colorless statement to all of us,
to all Americans, to all human beings:' The
two women started with a simple premise:
that you can't simply blame and disrespect
everyone around you. "When you change
that, when you respect yourself, then you
change the world and start to think about
things differently and feel like a part of a
great movement," Etheridge offers.
Etheridge sees the parallels between the
great movements for racial equality and
LGBTQ rights. She saw the gay nightclub
shooting in Orlando, Fla.,as a kindred event
to the black church shooting in Charleston,
S.C.: Both involved someone going into a
cultural safe space and making it unsafe. In
response, she wrote a song called "Pulse"
to benefit the Orlando victims.
"I see it all as the same issue, really, because it goes back to the basic fear of 'other; " she says. "That's what's driving these
events. Someone, inside of them, they've
been bred and taught that the problems
come from the outside, from someone
else, that someone's taking something
away from them, so they need to fear. Or
there's something inside yourself you need
to fear that is represented outside of you.
When you get that sort of pressure and you
twist it up with the pain inside a person,
they will explode and act out and do these
horrible acts. It all comes down to the fear.
"We have to deal with it. We have to
find a way to live with inclusion and bring
everyone in, celebrating all of the diversity
and understanding that diversity makes us
stronger:'
An ever-visible, ever-vigilant LGBTQicon,
Etheridge says she is up to the challenges that face us and always feels buoyed
by the responsibility that comes with her
platform. "I never think of it as a weight at
all, because of the times when someone
comes up to me and says, 'Knowing about
you saved my life: I get that. Or, 'When I was
a teenager, you made it possible for me to
come out: That means everything to me,"
she says. "So, if anyone has the chance
to do so much in the world just by being
themselves-and, in reality, we all have that
chance just to come out-I've always been
honored to represent and to inspire a group
of people. And I'll always feel that way:'
Three decades in, making a record
like MEmphis Rock and Soul is but one
way in which Etheridge strives to not
only represent and inspire, but to keep
things fresh-for herself and her fans.
:::0
I
~
C/)
"I have to keep delighting myself," she
says with a laugh. "I have to find the
things that excite me, find the things
I want to do that challenge me. I want,
every time I go onstage, to be excited,
because I get to perform in a certain
way. As long as I keep that going, I believe my audience will be delighted with
me. That's what they want: They want to
experience that creation of music and
delight in it with me. It's up to me to keep
myself delighted. That's my journey."
(melissaetheridge.com) •
KATE
BUSH
I I I
<
I I
MU
Before The Dawn
(Concord Records)
In 2014, UK art/folk/pop legend Kate Bush performed 22 shows at London's
Hammersmith Apollo, her first concert series in over 30 years. Bush has
released the live album of the concert titled Before The Dawn as a 3-disc
CD deluxe edition and 4-disc vinyl edition. The recording is a real treat for
fans who were at the concerts and for those who weren't lucky enough to
grab the tickets that sold out in 15 minutes. But don't expect this release
to be a "best of" compilation. Absent are tracks in Bush's younger, higher
vocal range such as "Wuthering Heights" and "Babooshka:' Instead,
relish mid-career faves such as synth-pop hits "Running Up That Hill" and
"Hounds of Love" in a lovely lower register, and glorious live moments of
her re-blossoming. This perfectionist performer, who some consider to be
the female David Bowie, is a rarity. We queer folk applaud the heartfelt and
dreamy originality of Kate Bush in an increasingly viral world. (katebush.com)
lADYGAGA
Joanne
(lnterscope Records)
We're loving Gaga's new pared-down incarnation of authenticity and
honesty. Her recent activism and philanthropy have found parallel in her
5th album, which reaches back to '60s and '70s rock and folk roots. Joanne
confronts the pain and sorrow of some women's lives (including Gaga's
own) as growing experiences. The album title refers to Gaga's late Aunt
Joanne who died of lupus at age 19; the Melanie Safka-esque title track pays
tribute to the early loss of this female role model. Anger, power, sadness,
and the need to overturn American masculinity myths to get to equality is
a key theme. Guest musicians invited to contribute include Florence Welch
and Beck, who add to a feeling of unpretentiousness and core self. Welch's
moving vocal performance on the track "Hey Girl" is a warm woman-towoman feminist plea to lift each other up; and as we know from recent
events, bad things happen when women hate each other. (ladygaga.com)
FEB/MAR
2017
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25
A new book by photographer
Roger Cormaacapt.u-~;>.--~~
Madonna's pre-fame style.
. Madonna gazes at the camera in the
summer of 1983, six weeks before the
• r·elease of the debut self-titled alb.um
----that would set her on the road to megare-effi:-1.A-t-t-rese-pl,etos-she--is bel-M--,
---playful, confident-waiting
for her big
vIous y unpu l1shed Polaroid images
-of Madonna, thou ht to have been lost
but recently rediscovered and made
i flt er-ed+trons-th-at-ha've-b-e
e 11 sig 11e d a 11d
• numbered by the photographer. Posing for Corman in a grungy, pre-gen~ri_fied Manhattan tenement, the~image;:,-------,---take us back to a simpler time when
ea strong wannabe shattered
lass ceilin
for women in o
and became a gay icon alorig the. ay.
(madunna66. om) •
26
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2017
REVIEWS/
Fl
FANS
GIVE
WYNONNA
EARP
THE
THUMBS
UP
ili•II
Katherine Barrell, star of the
supernatural Western horror
series, thanks them.
BY DANA PICCOLI
C
anadian actor Katherine Barrell
has always been an ally, but her
relationship
with
the
LGBTQ
community became a lot more
personal when she stepped into the boots
of Officer Nicole Haught, the fan-favorite
lesbian cop on the SyFy show Wynonna
Earp. "Getting to know fans, hearing their
stories, getting fan mail and letters with
people privately coming out to me and
saying 'You're the first person I've told; or
'You inspired me to talk to my family'-I
think it's a massive difference;' says Barrell.
Clearly, she means a lot to her fans, but
the experience has been profound for her
as well. "Being able to have such a direct
effect on people has been amazing and a
huge privilege. Just being able to directly
talk to the people that the show is helping,
and changing aspects of their lives-I think
for the better:'
Wynonna Earp has made a huge impact
on queer fans, who have been rightfully
guarding their hearts in the wake of the
Bury Your Gays trend. When Nicole Haught
was shot in the chest at the end of Season
1, fans were relived and delighted that she
was wearing a bulletproof vest and would
live to fight another day, and to flash them
her dimpled smile.
Not only does Barrell star in the TV show
Wynonna Earp, her character, and likeness,
have been added to the comic book spinoff as well. Seeing herself immortalized in
the comics was a real trip. "It was crazy. I
mean, that was like next level for me. Even
more than being on TV. Because, as an
actor, I've seen myself on TV already, but I
think to be in a comic book is something
really special and really different. To see
yourself essentially being portrayed as
a superhero, in a way, is really crazy and
beautiful. It took some adjusting, for sure."
Being the face of one of television's most
popular lesbian characters has changed
Barrell's life significantly in the past year.
"Just having people be so passionate about
the show. We have the best fans. I mean,
they petitioned SyFy for a Season 2-that's
how amazing our fans are. They pretty
much got our show renewed. It's been
such a wonderful thing to be a part of,
and so many actors go their entire careers
without ever getting close to anything like
this experience. I'm really lucky."
And to all you Nicole Haught cosplayers
out there: Keep it up. Barrell is overjoyed
about seeing you wearing her Purgatory
police uniform. "The detail and the time
people put into their costumes is just so
wonderful and so cool;' she says. "I'm still
kind of baffled that we are where we are,
and it hasn't even been a year. It's just, like,
where are we going to go from here?"
If you ask fans, the sky's the limit for
Katherine Barrell and Wynonna Earp.
Filming for Season 2 is underway, and
fans are on the edge of their seats when
it comes to Nicole and Waverly, or
WayHaught, as they are also known. When
we last saw Waverly, she had been infected
with a touch of the old evil. What does this
mean for the couple? Guess you'll have to
tune in to the show this spring, Earpers.•
Katherine Barrell will appear at ClexaCon
in Las Vegas, March 3-5. (clexacon.com)
FEB/MAR
2017
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27
SPEAK
ITS
NAME
A new British book of portraits
celebrates LGBT pioneers.
BY SOPHIE WARD
28
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
How
does it feel to be part of monumental change in your lifetime? To be
part of history not because you were
swept up in events, a force majeure, or
a bit part in someone else's war, but because you effected change through your
own agency and determination? All of
you reading this article will have been
part of that movement. All of you are part
of that history. You stood against the tide
of public opinion and calmed the waters
for your own and coming generations
with new laws that you fought for and
civil rights that you claimed. You did it
through the grandest of gestures and
toughest of fights and you did it with
the smallest and most personal of your
choices. You did it with love.
The last 50 years, and the past few
in particular, have seen momentous
change in laws and attitudes towards
LGBT people. We still have so far to go
but we have many new freedoms, and
chief among those is the legal recognition of our right to exist, form families,
marry, divorce and be at the hospital
bedside of our loved ones.
As recently as the 1990s, lesbian
mothers were losing custody of their
children to their ex-husbands purely on
REVIEWS/BO
the basis of their sexuality or whether
they were perceived as "good" (closeted) lesbians, or "bad" (open) lesbians.
Today, the suitability of lesbians to parent is not even open to debate and we
are celebrated for proposing to our girlfriends on Olympic rugby fields in front
of the world's press.
My Korean-American wife moved to
England from Los Angeles to be with me
in 1996. Contrary to everyone's expectations, America was even further behind
LGBT rights than the UK. There was no
legal way to recognize our relationship in
either place, and therefore no imminent
possibility of our staying together in the
same country. But, after much hard work
from pressure groups such as Stonewall
Immigration, the Blair government introduced a policy for same-sex couples. By
following every little byway of this labyrinthine new legislation for four years,
we obtained an indefinite leave-to-remain for Rena. The legend "unmarried
partner of Sophie Ward" was writ large
across the visa in her passport, leading
to many strange interviews at various
international borders, but we sobbed as
we realized we could now officially stay
together. We celebrated with a commitment ceremony in 2000. We felt married
that day but we had no idea that within
15 years equal marriage would be established under UK law.
The understanding that it was thanks
to all the LGBT activists who had come
before us, by campaigning or just living
their lives openly, is central to the analysis of the advance of gay rights and acceptance. A new book, Speak Its Name!
published by the National Portrait Gallery, celebrates the many lesbians, gay
men and famous allies, from James I of
England and VI of Scotland to Elizabeth
Taylor and Kate Tempest, whose portraits form part of their archives. Written
by Christopher Tinker with a full and very
personal introduction by Simon Callow,
the book allows for many happy hours
reading about favorite icons and discovering new ones. Unsurprisingly, the ratio
of male to female portraits noticeably
increases after the 1900s (thank you,
Bloomsbury women) but those early lesbian pioneers make fascinating reading.
Did you know about the artist Rosa
Bonheur (1822-99)? I didn't, and now
long to see an exhibition of her work. Admired by Queen Victoria, who surely did
not know about her private life, Bonheur
was born in Paris and trained at the Louvre's art school. She lived with Nathalie
Micas and later Anna Klumpke and was
awarded the Legion d'Honneur in 1865.
Sadly, her picture does not show her
dressed in the male attire that she had
to seek authorization to wear from the
prefect of police.
Another artist with a preference for
masculine clothing,
Gluck (Hannah
Gluckstein 1895-1978), painted a self-portrait uninhibited by notions of propriety.
A striking individual who had affairs with
society florist Constance Spry, socialite Nesta Obermer and journalist Edith
Shackleton, Gluck also rejected gender
prefixes and other societal impositions
and found continuing success as an artist into later life. You can read more in
Gluck: Her Biography by Diana Souhami.
A luminous portrait of Radclyffe Hall
(1880-1943) by Charles Buchel defies
my preconceptions of the writer as a
tormented woman. Comfortable in her
mannish turn-of-the-century
costume
and cropped hair, the author of The Well
of Loneliness gazes with an intelligent
serenity away from the artist. When I
was first questioning my sexual orientation and longing to know more about
the feelings I could no longer ignore, it
was reassuring to know that such talented and brave women had forged a path
long before my lifetime but those lives
seemed so difficult and, as the title of
her novel emphasizes without subtlety,
lonely.
As a child, I had been labelled a "tomboy," a perfectly acceptable tribe in the
1970s, when wearing dungarees, climbing trees and building Lego forts were
seen as fashionable not aberrant, but I
did not want to be a man. What I recognize when I look at Speak its Name's distinctive portraits now, is that the women
were often simply defining their own
freedoms, the same freedoms afforded
to men of their day, by liberating themselves from restrictive clothing and social expectations.
Still, what women! Alice B. Toklas and
Patricia Highsmith, Greta Garbo and
Marlene Dietrich, Josephine Baker, Billie
Jean King and Maggi Hambling. So many
brilliant and fascinating lesbians and
bisexual women living their lives to the
fullest and in doing so letting the world
know who they were.
These portraits are significant not only
because these women were successful
in their own sphere but because they tell
us and future generations that their lives
are possible. When we are discovering
who we are, we look to these women to
guide us. Radclyffe Hall may have given
me a somewhat mixed message, but
Stella Duffy wrote about sexy lesbians
with modern relationship troubles. Sarah
Waters and Val McDermid were also out
authors including lesbian characters in
their fiction. For full disclosure, an early
photo of me, taken by Trevor Leighton,
is included. I don't pretend to possess
the kudos of the subjects that surround
me, only acknowledge the debt that
I owe them. (npg.org.uk) •
SAPPHIC
SCREEN
Drawing back the curtain
on the queer female
players of Hollywood's
golden age.
BY MERRYN JOHNS
As a gentleman scholar of the golden
age of Hollywood, author Boze Hadleigh
has been sure to include as many queer
women in his 15 books on the subject as
possible, and with good reason: a number
of the most celebrated screen icons were
lesbian, bisexual or queer. His classic Hollywood Lesbians, first published in 1994, was
a delight to read and featured interviews
Hadleigh conducted with stars such as top
1940s box-office earner Barbara Stanwyck, brilliant character actors Dame Judith
Anderson, Sandy Dennis, Capucine, and
Agnes Moorehead-as well as exceedingly rare interviews with pioneering lesbian
director Dorothy Arzner, Oscar-winning
30
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
costume designer Edith Head, and comedians Nancy Culp, Marjorie Main, Patsy
Kelly and Ann B. Davis. In a new edition of
the book, published this past fall, Hadleigh
added chapters on Greta Garbo, Jodie Foster, Ellen DeGeneres and Rosie O'Donnell,
and evaluated their contributions as queer
women to the entertainment industry and
to the wider culture.
There were others he wanted to interview but who declined, such as the late Bea
Arthur. "I kept trying to interview her and
we talked over the phone many times over
the years... She liked the idea of the book
but didn't want to be in it;' says Hadleigh.
Those who did agree to interviews were
guarded, if not hostile. It's almost shocking to read that a furious Barbara Stanwyck ended a cat-and-mouse interview
with Hadleigh and asked him to leave her
house when he raised the topic of marriages of convenience (it's speculated that
Stanwyck's marriage to Robert Taylor was
a "lavender marriage:') All the women
interviewed were deeply conflicted and
closeted, including Edith Head, who gave
Hadleigh an 8-page contract to sign, stipulating that the interview not be published
in her lifetime. "That generation of women
just didn't want the reality [of coming out];'
he tells me. "They came from a time when
Hollywood had nothing to do with reality:'
Even Jodie Foster's coming out at the 2013
Golden Globe Awards has been followed
by silence. "I don't think you'll ever see her
memoirs;' says Hadleigh. "By her own nature she's a very closed person. When people are working in their commercial prime ...
they're that much more difficult to access
in terms of reality:'
Another factor that hides queer women in plain sight is often their bisexuality,
which is more common among Hollywood
REVIEWS/BO
women than men. Add to that the fact
that many Hollywood biographers impose their own morality on the subjects
they admire, and history can become
straightwashed. Take, for example, the
relationship between Katharine Hepburn and Spencer Tracy. Was it real or
staged? "We may never know;' muses
Hadleigh. "He was a good cover for her.
That's always a big factor in Hollywood.
And so, forever more it's 'Tracy and Hepburn: Of course it comes out eventually
that he was bisexual and so chronically
alcoholic he may have been impotent
and not able to have sex after a certain
age:' But Hollywood's made its mind up
about Hepburn: The Aviator portrays her
as a neurotic heterosexual and not the
brilliant bisexual that she actually was.
And then there are the smoke screens
conjured by the stars themselves. As
Mae West once said, "It's not the men
you see me with that counts; it's who you
don't see me with that does:'
For example: "With Garbo, we know
that she was basically lesbian;' asserts
Hadleigh. "But to what degree she was
bisexual we don't know. Did she have
relationships with gay men like Gayelord
Hauser and Cecil Beaton? It's possible,
especially if both those men were trying
to force themselves to be straight for the
sake of their image."
But outing a star, according to Hadleigh, is neither an ethical or effective alternative. "Because if you say X is gay,
lesbian or bi and they say they're not,
that's what the media goes with-and
much of the public. Very often with outing it has to do with how admired is the
person. So if it's a Cary Grant or a Katharine Hepburn, it's much more difficult to
get it out that these people were bisexual because they were so esteemed:'
The new generation of actors is making a difference. "I think they're so much
more open about their sexuality, especially the women. If they're attracted to
another female they'll say it publicly;'
says Hadleigh, citing Jennifer Lawrence
and Amy Schumer. So maybe one day
we'll have a third edition of Hollywood
Lesbians. But for now, this one is certainly a most fascinating read.
Hollywood Lesbians is now available
from RiverdaleAve Books.
LOVE
AT
THE
WHITE
HOUSE
A former First Lady's lesbian affairs.
BY MARCIE BIANCO
SUSAN
WITnc ALBERT
Ywtr-,1,
.. ,.."f..._~
A female journalist falls in love with the
First Lady of the United States. Their love
affair waxes and wanes over 30 years. No
matter that work, competing interests,
even other romantic dalliances threaten
to separate them-their deep bond transcends all of life's ups and downs.
This is the story of the relationship between the longest-serving FLOTUS, Eleanor Roosevelt, and the AP reporter Lorena
Hickok. Their love story is the subject of not
one but two recent publications: the biography Eleanor and Hick: The Love Affair That
Shaped a First Lady, by Susan Quinn (Penguin Press), and the novel Loving Eleanor,
by Susan Wittig Albert (Persevero Press).
These books offer very distinct takes on
the relationship. Quinn's contextualizes the
budding of Eleanor and Hick's relationship
within a larger historical narrative about
America during the Great Depression and
the Second World War. The book is chronological and weaves together chapters that
focus on Eleanor'sand Hick's separate lives
before they met, as well as their separate
lives after they met-for the lives of these
two working women proved a tremendous
challenge to their relationship. They both
traveled extensively: Eleanor, in the role of
First Lady, speaking on behalf of her husband's New Deal programs, and Hick to report on poverty and society throughout the
Depression, an assignment that took her to
the poorest and most remote locations in
the country.
Whereas Quinn is restrained with her
language regarding the amount of sexual
intimacy these two women shared, Albert dives right into it in her fictionalized
account of the relationship, which is narrated through Hick's eyes. Albert's novel
ascribes to many conventions of the lesbian romance and is replete with the typical
language of romance novels in general:
"[Eleanor] took my hand and kissed my
fingers. 'Thank you; she said. 'Oh Hick,
you don't know how much I need you' ... I
leaned forward and kissed her. 'Then come
to me, dear; I said, urgent now, direct:'
But Albert's writing style has a source:
the 3,500 letters uncovered in 1978, 10
years after Hick's death (300 of which
were published in Empty Without You:
The Intimate Letters of Eleanor Roosevelt
and Lorena Hickok, Free Press, 1998). Hick
demanded in her will that these letters remain unopened for that period of time; in
1978, researchers, historians, and friends
of the two women opened up 18 boxes of
letters and other correspondence between
the two women dating from 1932 to 1962,
the year of Eleanor's death. Some of these
exchanges were quite explicit: "All day I've
thought of you & another birthday I will be
with you, & yet tonite you sounded so far
away & formal," Eleanor wrote to Hick the
day after FDR'sinauguration in 1933. "Oh! I
want to put my arms around you, I ache to
hold you close. Your ring is a great comfort.
I look at it & think, she does love me, or I
wouldn't be wearing it!"
It is rumored that Eleanorwore Hick's ring
for the rest of her life, even when the First
Lady was romantically involved with other
men and women. Hick, too, had flings with
other women throughout the decades, especially when Eleanor became distant, for
professional or personal reasons.
These two books provide two different
ways of recording possibly one of the most
unique, compelling, and high-profile lesbian relationships of all time.•
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
31
CHARITY
In Charity, South Dakota the friendship
between Lena Kaiser, a sodbuster's
daughter, and Gustie Roemer, an
educated Easterner blossoms like wild
flowers in the tough prairie soil.
BY PAULETTE CALLEN
32
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
REVIEWS/SHORT
6
ustie shuddered and whispered,
"Oh, my Christ."
Ridges of white flesh, like
twisted ropes, formed a web of
scar tissue that crisscrossed, biting
into Jordis's smooth brown skin. What had
looked like a shadow of dancing leaves
was a hideous caricature of the leaf itself.
Gustie cupped her right hand, dipped
into Crow Kills, and poured water slowly
over Jordis's back. Jordis arched slightly
then relaxed.
"Does it hurt?"
"Sometimes. Water and Grandmother's
ointment help."
Gustie's left hand remained on Jordis's
shoulder. With baptismal motions she
continued to bathe her back.
"How did you get this?'
Jordis took a deep breath. The moon
rose over Crow Kills and let fall a trembling
beam across the water. "I was nine years
old and my brother George was twelve
before we ever went to school. Our
mother kept us hidden, but she could not
hide us forever. The Agency got wind of
us, and we were picked up and hauled off
to an Indian school run by a minister and
his wife. I looked at it as an adventure.
They told me I was going to learn to
read books, and I would come back to
my mother when it was over. My brother
was wild with fear. He was older-maybe
knew more of what we were in for. I do
not know.
"He turned sullen and would not speak
at all. A little kindness might have helped
him get over it, but at the school, they
saw his long hair and before they even
spoke to us, or fed us, or let us rest, they
had to have it off. His beautiful long hair.
'Here, little boys do not have long hair,'
they said. 'Only little girls have long hair.
You do not want to be like a little girl, do
you? They humiliated him. Then, in front
of all of us, they cut off his hair."
Jordis paused and Gustie continued
pouring water over her shoulders, across
the top of her back and the back of her
neck. Jordis relaxed and put her head
down as Gustie massaged the lake water
into the ridged flesh. She kept her head
down and went on softly, "In the middle
of the night, I got out of bed and found
the kitchen. I took a knife, and I cut my
hair off, too. When the matron saw me
in the morning she started howling and
pulled me in to see Everude. He was the
preacher. I will never forget him. An ugly
red-faced man always in a black suit. It
was not that they cared about my hair.
Some of the girls had their hair cut when
they came to the school. I guess they had
lice. I had no lice! They did not care about
my hair-what made them mad was that I
defied them. I did something on my own.
An Indian! A girl. Those teachers and
preachers ...you know, they loved Indians
all right as long as we were docile-like
dogs-and
showed we wanted to be
like them. If we showed any resistance,
they were no better than the soldiers
who poured lead and whiskey into our
fathers and grandfathers. I decided ... !
was only nine, but I decided, if they made
my brother, a Dakotah, cut his hair, I, his
sister, a Dakotah, would cut mine too.
They did not understand it. My brother is
dead. He wasn't made for changes. It is
easier for the women. The changes. The
men could not do it. I have kept it short.
For my brother. I will always keep it short.
For my brother's hair will never grow. So
my hair will never grow long."
Gustie continued
to bathe the
outraged flesh of Jordis's back.
"They starved me all that day. The next
day I started classes. I enraged Everude
even more by being good at my studies.
I learned English. We had to. They hit
us if they heard us speaking Dakotah.
I learned to read, and I read everything
and made a game of passing their tests.
And every time my hair grew out a little, I
hacked it off. After I had been there about
a year, Everude had had enough. He said
I would be 'severely punished' if I ever did
it again. Cut my hair. My hair had become
the most important thing in his life, and
in mine! He was a mean man, and I had
no doubt that I would get a beating.
Beatings were common there. Usually a
few straps in the horse shed with a belt.
I knew I could take it. The next morning
I showed up at breakfast with my hair
hacked off down to the roots. I was some
sight!"
Jordis chuckled and turned slightly,
leaning into Gustie, balancing herself by
resting her hand in the curve of Gustie's
left arm. Gustie continued to massage
the cool water into her back.
"I did not even get all the way through
my bowl of oatmeal and piece of dry
STO
bread before he yanked me from the
table and dragged me to the shed. He
made me take my dress off and lie face
down on the floor. He beat me with a
horsewhip or some kind of whip."
Jordis's hand tightened on Gustie's
arm. Gustie stopped her massage and
held her in the lightest embrace. Jordis
spoke her next words slowly, between
her teeth.
"I did not give him the satisfaction of
making a sound. He whipped me until
I fainted and left me on the floor of the
shed. Later, one of the teachers and the
cook carried me to my bed and dressed
the wound. He would not let them call
for a doctor. It did not heal. They thought
I was dying and somehow the cook got
word out to Grandmother. Why they
were so afraid I would die, I don't know.
The graveyard out behind the school was
full of dead Indian children."•
JORDIS'S
HAND
TIGHTENED
ONGUSTIE'S
ARM.GUSTIE
STOPPED
HER
MASSAGE
ANDHELD
HERINTHE
LIGHTEST
EMBRACE.
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
33
IEWStGIFT
GUIDE
.......................................................................................................................................................................................................................
•·..
11sPP"
'\ ~l~1;~rf\~ 1;'S
\l1~"
-----~-
---
CANDY KISSES
A NATURAL VALENTINE'S
Give your girl a loving touch with
Valentina's Naturals Hydrating Body
& Massage Oil in rose-scented True
Love aroma. Deeply moisturizing, it's a
great post-bath romantic ritual. Follow
up with the delicious, all-natural Body
Mist. (valentinashomebrewed.com)
What a luminous idea: a
candle subscription! Vellabox
delivers high quality candles,
crafted by American artisans,
combined with a bonus
lifestyle gift and unique
packaging to create a
memorable gift every month.
(vellabox.com)
FIRE AWAY, FIRE AWAY
Get your Jane Bond on with the
new sleek and modern Crave
Bullet vibe. This aesthetically
pleasing and functional vibe is
made from durable and bodysafe stainless steel. It's a lovely
humdinger. (lovecrave.com)
Saturate your lips in lush,
sophisticated color with
Sheer Wisdom Lush Lip Oil.
Perfect for makeout sessions,
its sexy and oh-so-kissable
ingredients include Tahitian
coconut oil, Prickly Pear
seed oil, and Cloudberry oil.
(butterlondon .com)
••
SAY IT WITH A BOUQUET
MY SPICY VALENTINE
Bring her brunch in bed with a spicy
Bloody Mary cocktail using premium
brand Ketel One Vodka. For a twist on
the classic, try the Ketel One Clamato,
and garnish it with a celery stalk, lemon
wedge, crisp bacon rasher, olives, or all
of the above. (ketelone.com)
There's no simpler way to say "I
love you" than with a Teleflora
Swirling Heart Bouquet, handdelivered red and pink roses,
arranged in a collectible
stoneware vase with intricate
heart motif. (teleflora.com)
...
··\......................................
. . ..................................................................................................................................................
.
34
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
IEWStSEX
I meet Sacchi Green, two-time
Lambda Award winner and editor of
Me and My Boi: Queer Erotic Stories,
at my local queer cafe. Our town's
go-to laptop land for the pierced,
tattooed, and gender-variant-the
location of too many Tinder dates and
just enough queer crafting circles-is
busy as usual when I spot Green ordering an iced tea at the register.
She's easy to pick out from this
cafe's particular crowd-not
just because I did my due diligence and
studied her book-jacket headshotbut because she doesn't look like
what many people might think the author of queer, lesbian, bisexual, and
otherwise-non-hetero
erotica would
look like.
She laughs easily at this cognitive
dissonance as we dive right into our
first topic, pronouns and the gender spectrum. "There's no standard
yet for pronouns. There is no longer
a binary system," Green states matter-of-factly. "There are infinite points
on the spectrum now. Which can be
hard. The best thing to do is to ask
someone what they want to be called.
But it might not stay the same, and
it might not be the same thing they
wanted to be called."
She sips her iced tea like a true editor, adding a real-life semicolon to
her sentence. "I can't pass for anything besides a grandmother, at this
point. Which I am. So, It's complicated," she laughs. "But you know, every
generation
thinks they've invented
sex. Have they not heard of the '60s?"
Her latest collection
of erotic
shorts, Me and My Boi, includes stories by of-the-identity-spectrum
writers and queer culture-makers
such
as Sinclair Sexsmith, Tamsin Flowers,
and Sommer Marsden, whose sensual stories all aim to "celebrate masculine-of-center
women in all their
glorious variety," says Green.
Of her editing process, Green says,
"My Call for Submissions always includes a description of what I'm looking for, but I get a special charge
THE
LIFE
EROTIC
For editor Sacchi
Green, titillating tales
have broadened our
rainbow spectrum.
BY YANA TALLON-HICKS
36
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
from stories that surprise me with
something I didn't even know I wanted. Just like the best sex.
"For Me and My Boi, I stated a clear
vision: Tell me stories about more-orless female-identified,
screw-the-binary free spirits of all flavors. Cool
bois, hot bois, swaggering bois, shy
bois, geek boys, drag kings, leather
bois, flannel bois. Young is fine, but
so are butch daddies, mentors, and
role models."
As requested, all the between-thesheets stories contained
between
Me and My Boi's covers do just this.
From bossy blowjobs to tender lovemaking, in old-school
lesbian bars,
Parisian drawing rooms, and hipster
Brooklyn bike shops, queer sex reigns
supreme.
But in the age of high-tech sex
toys, why read erotica? Lesbians and
queers "don't want to be pigeonholed
that way-in the way that has told us
that everything queer must be inherently sexual," says Green. "People
often avoid erotica because they've
read so much bad erotica. I don't
know how many reviews I've read of
my work by writers who say, 'I don't
read erotica but this one is good!' "
So what makes Green's erotica collections good, and, more importantly,
good for us as LGBTQ folks? "Erotic
interchanges
deal with heightened
emotions and sometimes, especially
with queer people, heavily-weighted
baggage from past experiences. With
same-sex characters,
the complex
nature of life for the whole LGBTQ
spectrum adds an edge of potential
risk, whether overt or unspoken. This
can create powerful elements for storytelling.
Beyond all that, those complexities
and risks in our LGBTQ lives make
reading erotica
especially
important for us. The reflection of our own
desires, fantasies, and identities becomes validation
and celebration,
even more essential than the physical
and emotional charge it offers."
(sacchi-green.blogspot.com)
•
4
RAINBOW RUNWAYREVOLUTION
46 NEW YEAR,NEW SKIN
FASHION
ACCESSORIES
NTITY
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
37
es the transition
Kipper Clothiers mak
g to casualwear.
from bespoke tailorin
CLARA FRANK
ADAMS
PHOTOS BY JAY
STYLING BY
FEATURES/
ST
rin Berg and and Kyle Moshrefi
met at a fashion start-up in San
Francisco almost
four
years
ago. "We were both volunteering our time there and quickly realized
that we would make excellent business
partners and decided to give it a shot,"
explains Moshrefi, who is co-founder and
chief creative officer of the San Francisco-based Kipper Clothier.
At the time, Moshrefi and Berg were
strangers, but the neutrality of their relationship proved to be an asset when starting the company. "We had maybe known
each other for about a month. I think that
really helped us actually," says Moshrefi.
"Not only were we building Kipper, but we
were also building our professional relationship. Three and a half years later I can safely
say that we are not only business partners,
but good friends too. That's the key to owning a business with someone else, you have
to like each other!"
How did two strangers click over fashion? Erin Berg, co-founder and chief operating officer shared Moshrefi's frustration
with the lack of options for lesbians and
transgender men looking for high quality,
hand-crafted and well-fitted custom suits.
"After the repeal of Proposition 8, we decided it was time to create something that
served the LGBTQ community around the
idea of accessibility to all genders. That's
when Kipper Clothiers was born and three
years later we continue to provide exceptional menswear that caters to every body
type, despite gender identity," says Berg.
Kipper Clothier makes menswear accessible through a collaborative and educational purchasing process where clients
spend time working with a personal stylist
looking at fabrics and design options, then
works with a tailor to get a precise fit. This
in-depth collaboration
leaves the client
with the product they envisioned, plus
more knowledge about the aspects of suiting and shirting. The word "Kipper" is in fact
an old industry term from London's 19th
century Savile Row and refers to a female
tailor or tailoress. These working women
went jobbing in pairs to avoid unwanted
advances from men. "We thought it worked
perfectly;' says Moshrefi. After creating a
business plan, taking a few courses in en-
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
39
trepreneurship, and talking to as many people as possible, the brand was born.
"The business has grown faster than
we could have imagined;' says Moshrefi.
"We've had a brick and mortar going strong
for over three years and with the recent
launch of our casual collection, we've expanded through e-commerce to be widely
available to everyone looking for quality everyday wear:'
The Kipper Clothier client is hard to pin
down, says Berg. "We don't have a typical
client. We began the company focusing on
making suiting and shirting for women and
transgender folk, but as our brand grew, so
did the variety of people that wanted our
style of suiting and shirting:'
In the midst of the genderqueer fashion
revolution, Kipper Clothier offers clients
self-expression through fashion "as a mode
of resilience against prejudice;' says Berg.
"We are putting that resilience and self-expression front and center for the world to
see. We empower the LGBTQcommunity,
and transgender people specifically, to express their identity through fashion."
And it's not just all about bespoke tailoring, either. Check out the new line of Kipper
Casuals, and get ready for more relevant,
revolutionary and ready-to-wear styles in
2017.(kipperclothiers.biz) •
FEATURES/
ST
ast to coast.
volution goes from co
The queer fashion re
LCE VITA
BY ANITA DO
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FEATURES/
STYLE
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Here are just a few
those events. •
STYLE/
BEAUTY
• BEAUTY FROM THE INSIDE
BeautyWorksWest•
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SEX
BeautyWorksWest•
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BeautyWorksWest•
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;;,a;I RESVERADERM
SKIN
LOVE AND RENEW
THE SKIN YOU'RE IN.
SKlNN'
Pure Pore Detoa
Intense Port
ExtractingCleanS<"r
SKtNN'
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slrumdejour
46
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
Applying topical creams and ointments is
one thing, but nourishing your cells from the
inside is another. The UK's BeautyWorksWest,
newly launched in the US, is working to
replace your daily multivitamin with a special
dietary supplement that addresses aging.
As we age, hormone changes decrease our
ability to absorb vital nutrients. Now you can
boost your nutrients in three key aspects:
Youth, Energy, and Sex. Or maybe all three!
These formulas are a combination of vitamins,
minerals, amino acids and plant extracts.
Take two in the morning and two before
bedtime and let them work their magic. ($110,
bea utyworkswest.com).
•
WINE NOT
We've often heard that a glass or two of
red wine a day is good for heart health
via antioxidants, but the science on this is
sketchy, plus, drinking wine is often not great
for your skin. But you can give your skin a
big sip of the anti-aging ingredient found in
wine without raising a glass. Resveratrol is an
antioxidant found in red wine that is known to
protect skin cells against oxidative damage
and reduce inflammation. In total, Sesderma's
Resveraderm Cream helps to replenish
moisture, recover luminosity and even out
skin tone with its formula of resveratrol,
retinal, coenzyme Q-10, vitamin C and E.
($56, sesdermausa.com)
The pores in your skin are often an indicator of
how happy your skin is. Keep your skin clear
and content with a trio of Skinn products:
Refine your skin with the Pure Pore Detox,
a sulfate and oil free cleanser designed to
strip your skin of dirt, grime, and make-up,
courtesy of natural oils from Brazilian Volcanic
White Clay and Amazonian Green Clay. Using
this cleanser twice daily sets your skin on the
path to detox and renewal. Follow up with the
Daytime Pore Reducing Serum that smooths
during the day, and the Overnight Pore
Reducing Serum which is rich in fruit acids
and brightens your complexion while you
sleep. ($20 and up, skinn.com)
48OUR GENERATIONS
50ELDERLIVING
61QUEEN HELEN
58
MY SPIRITUALITY
BY NICOLE
PACENT
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
47
iflt:x~
MY
SPIRITUALITY
An out bisexual actor reflects on her living faith.
BY NICOLE PACENT
For the past several years now, it's
been pretty uncool to believe in God. At
least if you were born after 1980. And live
in a coastal city. And have ever taken a
science class. As a liberal Millennial who
believes in God, I often feel like I was born
in the wrong generation, or am suffering
nostalgia for a 'simpler' time. My peers
speak about religion in derisive termsGod as an "imaginary friend;' faith as a
"crutch" for when scientific facts are not
"comforting" enough. As an educated
Millennial I regularly debate with my peers
on subjects such as politics, human rights,
art and philosophy. But when it comes to
discussing religion, I fall somewhat silent
for fear of being annihilated by logical,
scientific arguments for which I have no
real answer other than, "I can't explain how,
or why, but I just feel God. I do not pretend
to know, but I feel, and therefore I believe:'
Most of the time, my peers drop the subject
with a final 'agree to disagree' look. No need
to argue or convince, because "to each
their own" is a philosophy I live by.
I don't really mind if others think that
the way I live my life is passe. My fashion
sense has remained squarely in the '90s
and I'm okay with that, so I can deal with the
fact that my sense of spirituality is likewise
dated. Part of me longs for the connections
humans had with each other and with the
natural world before Smart Phones, but
personally I can say that nostalgia doesn't
play a role in my spirituality. I see spirituality
as a way of maintaining a relationship to
the present moment and to the universe
around me-a pursuit which, I would argue,
is necessary for one's own happiness, and
timeless in nature. Look at how yoga has
caught on in Western culture. The practice
has, for a lot of liberal-minded people my
age, taken the place of religious practice-
48
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
I
Follow Nicole Pacent at:
@nicolepacent on Twitter
you tu be.com/N icolePacent
facebook.com/N i colePacentActor
congregation as class, prayer as meditation.
The Sanskrit word "yoga" actually means
"to yoke or unite;' and depending on the
class you attend, "yoga" can mean uniting
with oneself or with God, but always in the
present moment. The popularity of yoga
points to a deep need people have in an
increasingly secular world to quiet their
minds and feel a sense of peace, and a
connection to something bigger. In this
way, Millennials may be more spiritual than
they admit.
People assume that if a Liberal-Millennialof-Faith believes in God we must not believe
in science. I recognize that there are plenty
of religious people in this country who, often
as a byproduct of the church and/or family,
feel that the only way to embrace spirituality
is to reject modern science. But this is not
how my spirituality works. I was fortunate to
grow up in a church, a family, and an area
that did not decry evolution or any other
facet of science, but let science and religion
co-exist peacefully. I owe much of my ability
to balance fact and feeling to the spiritual
discourse and inquiry encouraged by my
pastors. I attended First Congregational
Church of Old Greenwich, Connecticut,
which my mom decided our family would
join when I was a toddler because, at the
one service she'd attended while church
shopping, she loved the music, and the fact
that a very talented female pastor gave the
sermon. (Yay feminist choices, go Mom!).
According to the bylaws of the United
Church of Christ, under which First Church
exists, each individual in the congregation
has what is referred to as "the Right to Private
Judgement:' As explained to me in the year
leading up to my Confirmation, the Right
to Private Judgement means that although
we worship as a Christian community, we
are allowed and encouraged to develop
an individual sense of spirituality. We
were encouraged to take what worked
for us in Christian teachings, leave what
didn't, inquire about other religions and
belief systems, and draw conclusions for
ourselves about the universe around us. At
our Confirmation in ninth grade, we were
asked to read selected passages from our
personal Statements of Faith, individual
declarations of what we believed based
on a year's study and spiritual inquiry.
Some kids shared Christian beliefs, others
said they thought Jesus was less the literal
Son of God and more an awesome hippy
prophet with a tight connection to God (a
belief which aligns with my own). One of my
friends stood in front of the congregation
and proclaimed (in the form of a slam
poem) that a reincarnation-based belief
system made the most sense to him. By
the end of the service, each one of us was
confirmed and went on our merry JudeoChristian-Buddhist-Agnostic way.
See, at First Church our female pastor
told us that all major religions "were just
using different telescopes to look up at the
same star:' We were taught that science is
not in conflict with religion, but is proof of
God's awe-inspiring work. What we were
taught was a "living faith"-a faith that is
ever-evolving; an ongoing dialogue, full
of questions and self-drawn conclusions,
rather than blind belief in what someone
else says is so. And perhaps above all
else, we were taught that no matter what
you believed, it was love, community, and
outreach to those in need that mattered
most. During my junior year of high school,
when the LGBT movement was picking up
steam nationwide and several Christian
sects were denouncing homosexuality as
sin, the First Church congregation voted
to officially take on the title of 'Open and
Affirming; which meant welcoming people
"of all genders and sexual orientations:'
Sometimes I think about what would have
happened if I'd been raised in a church
that didn't embrace the LGBT community,
and I can't help but assume I would have
abandoned religion and lost my connection
to spirituality in general.
In this balancing act between science
and religion I would be remiss if I did
not mention my AP Physics teacher, Dr.
Mazmanian. A man with a Doctorate in
Physics and one of the most brilliant people
I have had the opportunity to interact with,
Dr. Mazmanian (or "Maz;' as he preferred
to be called) was a passionate scientist
and a strong believer in God, and this
seeming paradox inspired me. Maz did
not bring God into the classroom; rather,
his discipleship to the principle of energy
and his openness to the yet-unknown force
that created the universe as we know it
was itself a kind of spirituality. Perhaps the
best way I have ever heard the relationship
of science and spirituality explained is in
the phrase, "Science is the sheet music,
and spirituality is the cello:' Science deals
in logic, spirituality in feeling, and both are
necessary to paint a complete picture of
the universe and my place in it. In the nearly
two years since my younger sister took
her own life, science is how I have been
able to explain that Kim's energy was not
destroyed with her body, and spiritualitymy relationship with the Divine in the
universe-is how I have been able to feel
my sister's eternal life force with me still. I
don't know what the great beyond holds
for us after death-I don't know if Heaven
exists in the utopian way it is explained in
the Bible, or if it is something else entirely,
and I don't know whether or not our
consciousness travels with us there, but I
do find comfort in the belief that I will one
day be reunited with my sister. And I don't
experience that hope as a crutch. I see that
hope as belief in possibility, and possibility
as the core of living faith. There is so much
about the workings of the universe that we
don't yet know, and I allow the not knowing
to translate into possibility, because in
possibility there is magic.
The past few years I have found myself
using the mantra, "Choose magic;' and
when I say it, I am not rejecting fact, but
inviting a sense of wonder into my life.
In this way, I experience spirituality as an
opportunity, as a choice each of us has
in this life to either expand our capacity
for feeling, or remain limited to only what
logic can offer us. As I see it, what it comes
down to is this: If we have the free will to
choose our own paradigm, then why not
choose magic?•
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iflt:x~
HOMES
FOR
OLDER
LESBIANS
Where will we live when we're over the hill?
BY GILLIAN KENDALL
We're all living longer-some
of us much longer-than
ever before. An analysis of worldwide longevity records
published recently in the journal Nature shows that the
oldest age at which people die increased between the 1960s
and 1990s. Though the study shows that it did level off in the
1990s-at approximately 115years!-and does not seem to be
increasing further, many more people are now living to the
age of 100. And all of us, straight, gay, and undeclared,
need places to live that are safe, appropriate, and
enjoyable for our aging bodies and minds. As we get
older and older, where will we live?
Problems: disability, discrimination,
and isolation
For lesbians, aging can present
difficulties
different
from
those
encountered by straight women. For
example, more lesbians live in poverty
or at lower income levels than other
women. "New Patterns of Poverty in the
Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Community,"
a 2013 study from the Williams Institute,
concluded that "as poverty rates for
nearly all populations increased during
the recession, lesbian, gay, and bisexual
Americans remained more likely to be
poor than heterosexual people ...." A
related but less quantifiable problem is
that some lesbians do not have children or
an extended family on whom they can rely
for assistance.
And of course, many of us live in samesex relationships, which do not necessarily
constitute a regular or welcome element
within traditional retirement communities
or assisted living facilities. And even when
we look for homes to live in independently
(that is, not in an assisted living plan),
we can and do experience housing
discrimination.
A 2014 investigation from the Equal
Rights Center (ERC) found adverse
differential treatment (i.e. discrimination)
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against older same-sex couples seeking
housing in senior living facilities. In the
investigation, the ERC conducted 200
matched-pair telephone tests in 10 states:
Arizona, Colorado, Florida, Georgia,
Michigan, Missouri, New Jersey, Ohio,
Pennsylvania, and Washington. In 48
percent of the tests, a caller inquiring
about housing for a same-sex couple in a
senior living facility experienced adverse
differential treatment, compared to a
caller who was not asking about same-sex
accommodations.
Equally concerning, some 41 percent
of LGBT seniors (persons age 50 and
older) in the US are currently living with a
disabling condition. Research from SAGE
(Services and Advocacy for Gay, Lesbian,
Bisexual, and Transgender Elders) shows
that "compared to their heterosexual
counterparts, lesbian, gay and bisexual
older adults are at an elevated risk of
disability and mental distress.... This
means there are at least 1 million LGBT
older adults living with a disability, and this
number could double by 2050."
And even those of us not living with a
recognized disability are subject to stress
related to our queer identities. "Successful
Aging Among LGBTOlder Adults: Physical
and Mental Health-Related Quality of Life
by Age Group," a 2015 study in the journal
The Gerontologist, indicates what most
of us know intuitively-that physical and
mental health can deteriorate in the face of
discrimination and chronic conditions, but
they tend to improve with "social support,
social network size, physical and leisure
activities" and with a "positive sense of
sexual identity." In other words, the desire
of many lesbians to age in community is
good for our health.
Solutions: community living for LGBT
elders
The good news is that all across the
U.S. more and more facilities are opening
that welcome people of all orientations.
In New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, and
Philadelphia, gay-friendly elder housing
initiatives are under way or already in
existence. "It's exciting to see LGBTfocused senior living options across the
country, including the one that SAGE
is building in NYC," says Hilary Meyer,
JD, the director of National Programs at
SAGE. "But there will never be enough
LGBT-focused housing to accommodate
everyone-and not everyone wants to
live in exclusively gay accommodations.
Many people would just as soon stay in
the communities where they have lived
their whole lives. So we've developed a
two-pronged approach. For the folks who
don't want or need LGBT-only housing,
we developed a national LGBT cultural
competency training and credentialing
program for senior service providersSAGECare-so that no matter where
women live, there are no wrong doors
when they need care as they get older."
One of the most progressive and
exciting developments is in Florida,
where, for the first time, an affordable
LGBT senior housing development is
being built. Aimed at serving the LGBT
elder community, it will include subsidized
and supportive housing. The nonprofit
developer Carrfour Supportive Housing is
working with the Pride Center at Equality
Park, one of the nation's largest LGBT
organizations, to create and develop
senior housing specifically aimed at the
LGBT community.Robert Boo is CEO of
the Pride Center. He says that of the 180
members of Centerlink, the national
association of LGBT community centers,
the Pride Center at Equality Park is "about
the seventh largest," and being in Florida it
serves a large proportion of seniors.
Already, the Pride Center offers an
extensive range of senior programming.
For example, every Tuesday some
200 LGBT seniors attend a "coffee and
conversation" social, educational or
entertainment event at the Pride Center,
which Boo says is "a great way for our
seniors to come together and interact.
From 10 to 11 o'clock in the morning,
it's very social, people sitting around
talking, gossiping, kibitzing. At 11,there's a
program from a sponsor, then they break
into smaller groups and play games or
do afternoon movies, entertainment, or
other activities." But despite the extensive
services available to LGBT seniors at the
Pride Center, some problems remain. Boo
cites his organization's finding that "one of
the top issues with LGBT seniors in South
Florida is isolation and loneliness." Given
the potential for housing discrimination,
as well as the likelihood of isolation and
impaired health in LGBT elders, it was
a logical and worthy goal for the Pride
Center to implement a housing program.
Of the new housing initiative, Boo
says, "In the LGBT community there is
stigma and discrimination, because the
Fair Housing Act doesn't necessarily
preclude discrimination against gender
nonconformity. LGBT seniors are staying
longer in their own homes and suffering
from loneliness and isolation. Also, some
60 percent of the elderly are on disability,
so the support aspect of the housing is
important: About 70 percent of the units,
roughly 34 apartments, will be available
only to owners who have a disabling
condition, certified by a doctor, and who
are able to live on their own."
Complementing the extensive senior
programming offered at the Pride Center,
the housing, called the Residences at
Equality Park, will be built on the same
5½-acre campus, a few blocks off the
town's main road, and about 30 miles
north of Miami. In 2008, the Pride Center
purchased the campus in Wilton Manors,
and now it has five buildings, with tens
of thousands of square feet of meeting
and office spaces. Already, some 60
groups and organizations use the meeting
spaces and provide services there; eight
nonprofits are located on the campus.
These and other organizations will help
support and serve the residents of the
new housing facility.
Starting in 2018, the Residences
at Equality Park will open to provide
permanent affordable housing for lowincome senior adults, with a special focus
on members of the LGBT community.
According to Boo, the first phase will
include 48 apartments, a mixture of
studios and one- and two-bedroom units,
a car park, and "all of the amenities that
go along with a housing complex: library,
clubroom, cyber center, laundry, and
more." In the first phase, about 34 units
will be designated for low-income seniors
living with disabling conditions, such as
HIV/AIDS.The remaining units will provide
affordable housing for seniors who earn
less than 60 percent of the area's median
income, which would mean people
earning up to approximately $35,000 a
year. Phase two, for which funding has
not yet been applied, is expected to have
about 75 or 80 additional apartments, and
possibly a pool.
For aging lesbians and our families,
hopefully this trend will continue and
make it easier to plan for our own old-age
housing. (pridecenterflorida.org) •
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INHARMONY
Paula Kimper's radical muse.
BY GILLIAN KENDALL
Opera has traditionally been dominated by
boy-meets-girl love stories, but composer Paula
Kimper has written the first one about lesbians.
Kimper, who has received many commissions
from august musical institutions and is a Columbia
University Community Scholar, knows firsthand about
lesbian commitment. "I'm a lesbian," Kimper says.
"I'm out, and I'm married. I live in New York, and
as soon as it was possible in this state, we
got married."
Long before marriage equality was a
reality, Kimper was writing feminist works.
A graduate of the Eastman School of Music,
Kimper has been working for over 30 years
in the New York area, composing for opera,
theater, dance, television, film, and song.
She has taken femininity and womanhood
as her subjects, composing
songs
based on the poetry of Elizabeth Bishop
and Rumi; she has written works with
historical themes, including the operas
The Captivation of Eunice Williams and The
Bridge of San Luis Rey, based on the novel
by Thornton Wilder. Kimper's opera Truth,
an American opera about Sojourner Truth,
premiered in New York in 2013, played the
Academy of Music in Northampton, Mass.,
and now tours nationally.
But, most important, Kimper says,
"I've written four operas, and they all
have really strong women. That's sort of
my mission-to bring strong women to
opera. These women are strong, heroic,
and they have a happy ending. In opera,
most lesbians don't:' Kimper's operas
feature these heroic women as complex
lead characters. "Working in a large-scale
opera format reflects my aspirations as
a female musician and composer in a
traditionally male-dominated world," says
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Composer Paula Kimper
Kimper. "Growing up, I was told, 'Girls don't
play the trumpet; but I did it anyway; I was
one of just a handful who did. I am pleased
to see significant numbers of women
making music today, and I think the new
generation of female artists should feel
entitled to equality:'
In 1994, when Kimper began writing the
opera Patience & Sarah, an adaptation of
a historical novel by Isabel Miller, she had
no expectations about the legalization of
gay marriage. At that time, Kimper says,
"We were still aware of and struggling
with the issues that these ladies in the
opera did 200 years ago." The opera
premiered in a sold-out run at the 1998
Lincoln Center Festival, at a time when gay
marriage still wasn't legal in America. In
2015, an ensemble performed Act 2 from a
shortened "chamber opera" version at the
LGBTCenter in Greenwich Village on what
proved to be a historic day for gays. "We
did just one performance;' says Kimper.
"It was on June 26th, the day the Supreme
Court made the gay marriage decision!"
Kimper describes her recent work as
"kind of counterculture," adding, "very few
composers are their own producers."
Her next project is a new commission.
One Art will be based on Elizabeth
Bishop's poetry and set to music for the
soprano Laure Meloy. While the work is
still underway, audiences can expect to
encounter fine music and strong women
characters: a harmonious combination for
lesbian listeners. (paulakimper.com) •
HAVING
FUN
WITH
FEMINISM
Meet satirist Sarah Pappalardo.
BY MARCIE BIANCO
Lesbians are funny and comedy is in our
blood. Many of the most beloved lesbians
in mainstream American culture started out in
comedy: Ellen, Rosie, Wanda, Tig.
And if Sarah Pappalardo's success is
any indication, the younger generation
is carrying our iconic comedy status
forward. Pappalardo, 31, is cofounder, with
her sketch comedy colleague Beth
Newell, of popular website Reductress.
Since 2013, Reductress, which satirizes
women's magazines, has been heralded
as the feminist Onion and one of the best
websites on the Internet. You may not
recognize Pappalardo's tomboy style, but
you might remember headlines like "I Lived
It: A Lesbian Hit on Me, Again;' "5 Iconic
Lesbian Sex Scenes to Frantically Turn Off
When Your Mom Walks In," and "Sure, I'm
a Feminist, but if I Support Other Women,
How Will I Become the Highlander?"
Shortly after the launch of the website,
Pappalardo and Newell were approached
to write a book, but decided to wait for
the right moment-and a viral headline. "In
2014, we had posted a piece, 'The Prettiest
Feminist of 2014,' and people went ape
shit over it, thinking that it was real;' recalls
Pappalardo. Around this time feminism
started trending, and so the idea for the
book was born. "We thought, Why not
make a terrible manual about how to win
at feminism based on all these weird mixed
messages and unrealistic standards that
have been handed to us, a little bit by the
media and a little bit by other feminists?"
says Pappalardo. Humor aside, she notes,
"The goal is to come away not thinking that
feminism is a monolith-we can ultimately
be whoever we want."
How to Win at Feminism: The Definitive
Guide to Having It All-and Then Some!
hit bookstores in October. The tonguein-cheek title imparts the message that,
despite what the media suggests, feminism
is not a competition. Pappalardo explains,
"The implication that comes with all politics
these days is that we must be the best at
it, and somehow that shaming other people
makes us better at it, and we must read
all the books and do all the things, and
we must be gorgeous, and we all must be
some kind of robot Gloria Steinem:'
For Pappalardo, no topic is off-limits,
but one thing she avoids is "punching
down," she says, "which is kind of like a
fundamental comedy rule at this point. We
want to make sure that we're making fun
of the perpetrator and not the victim, and
that's what allows us to talk about things like
rape and rape culture, misogyny, and race
without being dicks about it.
"Our job as satirists is to help people be
more media aware, be more aware of the
small messages being sent, and hopefully
just use that awareness to not succumb
to the tricks that have been used time and
time again and have just taken on different
forms for each generation:'
How to Win at Feminism holds delicious
morsels for lesbians, with a full chapter on
"how to go through your lesbian phase,
whether it's one minute, or five years, or
your entire lifetime:'
In addition to the book and book tour,
Pappalardo and her team have ideas in the
works about the next stages of Reductress,
beyond the website and podcast. A stage
show coproduced with Second City is
scheduled to tour in 2017, and they are
currently pitching a TV show. The endgame
is world domination. "Whatever Oprah did
to women's media;' Pappalardo says, "we
want to do to women's media satire."
For Pappalardo and her Reductress
collaborators, there is a social function to
humor, and to satire in particular. Satire
and feminism make great bedfellows,
and Pappalardo is headlong between the
sheets, having a terrific laugh and making
us laugh, too. (reductress.com) •
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2017
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iilt:x~
QUEEN
VEE
Celebrating Supercoach,
Violet Palmer.
BY LYNDSEY D'ARCANGELO
Violet Palmer is glad to be retired.
But that doesn't mean she's at home
working on crossword puzzles or learning
how to crochet. That's not who she is.
PaImer, 52, has never been one to sit back
and watch the world go by. When she was
given the opportunity to become one
of the first fem a le referees in the NBA,
she took it knowing it would change
her life completely.
"At the time I got the call from the
NBA, I was the full-time recreation
director for the City of Los Angeles,"
Palmer explains. "I was pretty stable and
comfortable. Taking the job in the NBA
was like taking a leap into the unknown.
But I trusted my instincts. I knew I was
up for the challenge and that I could do
the job."
In 1997, the concept of women's
equality in the sports world was still
elusive, and the backlash to Palmer's
hire reverberated throughout the entire
professional
basketball
community.
Commentators, sportswriters, players,
and fans all questioned the move and
spoke out about it in mocking fashion.
The media attention was overwhelming.
But Palmer blocked out the noise.
"Everyone in the NBA circles knew
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about me already because I had been
refereeing in the Summer League," she
says. "But there was this uncertainty
among coaches and players. 'Can
we yell at her? She's a woman-is she
going to be afraid of us?' Hearing all
those things, I just said to myself, 'I'm
a referee. You can say what you want,
as long as you're not disrespectful. I'm
here to do my job.' And that's how I
approached it."
History was made when Palmer
stepped onto the court to ref her
first official NBA game, between the
Vancouver Grizzlies and the Dallas
Mavericks. She was "scared out of [her]
mind," nervous and excited. She felt
that the whole world was watching,
expecting her to fail. But once the ball
sailed out of bounds and Palmer blew
her whistle, that was it. Everything else
faded into the background. It was just
another game.
"For me, it was always about proving
that I had earned my keep, and that I
belonged on the court. When you're
out there refereeing the best basketball
players in the world, you have to be at
your best. Whenever I walked out there,
I was ready to go to work."
Palmer spent nearly 20 years as
an NBA referee, and in that time she
earned the respect and admiration of
players, coaches, and fellow referees
alike. They dubbed her "Queen Vee"
and accepted her into the fold as a
woman and a lesbian. At the beginning
of her career, Palmer says she was
reserved about coming out because of
all the focus on her gender in a male-
dominated
sport. She thought that
adding "lesbian" to the list would be too
much and take even more focus away
from her professional qualifications.
But as time went on, and society itself
evolved, Palmer decided
it wasn't
that big a deal anymore. In 2014, she
married her longtime girlfriend, Tanya
Stine.
Throughout
her career,
Palmer
says she never had any player use
discriminatory language toward her or
make homophobic comments in her
direction, despite it being common
knowledge that she was a lesbian.
She believes it's because the NBA is
a diverse organization
that pushes
for equality on a variety of levels, a
sentiment that can be backed up by
the league's recent positive actions
regarding LGBT issues and concerns.
NBA Commissioner Adam Silver took
part the New York City Pride Parade
this past summer, and also made the
decision to move the 2017 NBA AllStar Game out of North Carolina after
HB2-a law that blatantly discriminates
against transgender
individuals-was
passed.
"I think my coming out happened
organically, as it was supposed to,"
Palmer says. "I never felt like I was
hiding anything, because no one ever
publicly asked me about it. And the
players were always totally professional
and respectful with me. There was
never anything said about my gender
or my sexual preference, and I'm proud
to say that."
This past summer, Palmer finally
decided to hang up her whistle. Her
body was showing the effects of
running up and down the court every
night, and her extensive travel schedule
off the court was becoming too much
to bear. But that didn't mean she was
ready to give up working altogether.
Palmer took another job with the NBA,
this time as the manager of Referee
Development. She gets to share her
knowledge and experience, and advise
young, up-and-coming referees in the
league-something
Palmer is more
than happy to do.
"It's a way for me to help the next
generation
of referees get better.
And to go out and critique and train
is something I'm excited about. So,
I'm not really retired. I'm just retired
from running."•
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2017
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BRIDGING
THE
GAP
A lover of older women reflects
on her new relationship with a
younger woman.
BY JILL BENNETT
"I want to set you up with Lauren Neal."
"Great. Okay."
I was a few months out of a relationship and, as a lifelong
serial monogamist, I had no idea how or where to begin
the dating game.
"She's amazing. Ashley and I saw her one-woman
show last year." Haviland reached for her phone and
pulled up IMDb for proof. "She's smart. Talented.
She graduated from Brown, and she's hot."
Yeah. Damn. Lauren was hot, but
she looked really young. "How old is she?"
"Twenty-three. I think?"
Twenty-three? Like, just
graduated from college? Of
another generation? A Millennial?
Oh, boy.
Older women. Always. That was my rule.
Older women didn't struggle with their
sexual orientation. Older women knew what
they wanted and pursued it. Older women
just didn't play as many games.
I came out young compared to most
lesbians in my age bracket: I was 19.
College wasn't all that great for dating in
the mid '90s; most of us fell into the trap
of being someone's "experiment" at least
once. Anyone under 30 probably wouldn't
recognize the word "LUG;' but falling for
a Lesbian Until Graduation was a painful
reality for many Gen X lezzies. Moving to
Los Angeles was a godsend for a sexually
frustrated Midwesterner like me.
LA was once home to a multitude of
lesbian spaces-before they all disappeared.
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In the late '90s, Girl Bar was the sapphic
playground of my dreams. It was there
that I discovered my appreciation for older
women, who brought a welcome change
after a series of heartbreaking, collegiate
flings with non-committal, bi-curious types.
I soon settled into my first long-term
relationship with a woman twelve years my
senior. The pairing didn't work out (though
not as a result of our age difference), but it
did fortify the idea that older women were
the only logical option moving forward; only
once did I date someone my own age. Each
new relationship ran its course; each ended
for reasons unrelated to age.
At the same time, the gay community
was mobilizing. Gay straight alliances
popped up in high schools across the
country. Media representation gave LGBT
kids role models: Ellen came out; Will &
Grace ruled the airwaves. Lesbian websites
such as AfterEllen, Autostraddle and
SheWired added to the conversation and
the rapidly changing landscape. Kids were
coming out in college and high school and
younger, often dismissing and sometimes
even mocking the "L'' and "G" labels that
my generation had embraced in order to
achieve visibility.
I won't lie: the first time I heard a 13-yearold declare themselves a pansexual gender
non-conformist, I laughed. Loudly. Don't get
me wrong: I applauded how far we'd come.
It was fantastic that younger generations felt
that sexual and gender identity issues were
no longer political hot buttons. Millennials
seemed to live as if we had achieved that
very lofty goal of mainstream assimilation.
In 2012, while attending the very same
rural high school where I'd witnessed daily
harassment of the one openly gay student,
my own niece verified that being gay "wasn't
a big deal at all:'
Many Millennials have transformed
sexuality into a non-issue. As a result, most
lesbian spaces, physical and virtual, have
shuttered their doors. Over time, I found that
most younger women eschewed labels and
weren't particularly interested in gay spaces.
Truthfully, they didn't need them the way my
generation had.
While I admire the confidence of these
younger women, I often find myself
mourning the loss of our collective identity.
lack of women of color in movies and TV
to the refusal of many white, self-professed
progressives to acknowledge
Black
Lives Matter or why such movements are
important. Hell, I now notice when Lauren
is the only POC in a room, and how that
changes the conversation ...or doesn't.
Our friend groups have also meshed
surprisingly well. Most of my friends are
in their mid-to-late 40s; Lauren's circle is
primarily composed of her college friends,
all of whom are in their mid-to-late 20s.
We've mixed and mashed our cliques
for both social and creative purposes
and we've all left these exchanges a little
bit more "woke" (as the youngsters like
to say).
Perhaps it's a consequence of finding
a truly compatible person, but I believe all
of Lauren's and my differences have been
nothing but advantageous. We each offer
the other truly unique and new perspectives
under almost any circumstances. It's this
kind of open-mindedness and unity and
mutual respect that I found lacking in this
last U.S. election, even-and especiallyamongst liberals. Everyone knows how that
turned out.
There is still a slew of forces working hard
to delegitimize the love and livelihood of
members of myriad minority communities.
To present (and practice) a united front
in these current and future battles, it's
going to take empathy. It's going to take
a diverse coalition of individuals, one that
connects women and people of color and
religious communities.
We have entered a new era that
necessitates that we bridge the gap. It is
vital that we abandon our preconceived
notions and open up to the possibility that
we have something to learn from each
other. I did just that and I was lucky enough
to find the love of my life.
One can imagine my surprise, thenat age thirty-seven-when
my friend
announced that she was setting me up
with a 23-year-old. I had a pretty negative
attitude toward Lauren's generation. I had
three long-term relationships behind me;
none of them had worked out, despite my
best efforts.
It was for these reasons that I dove in
without any expectations. Lauren and I both
figured this could be fun, a fling; neither of
us thought it would yield anything lasting.
What could we possibly have in common?
We weren't just 14 years apart in age. We
were different races (I'm white; Lauren is
mixed) and different religions (I'm Jewish;
Lauren was raised a non-denominational,
cultural Christian). Even worse: I lived in the
Valley, and she lived in Los Feliz.
Almost four years later, I can attest that
our differences are our strengths. Except
the distance thing, that was non-negotiable
(Lauren now lives with me in the Valley).
While I'd trudged through the battlefield
of couples therapy numerous times,
Lauren's experience
with
long-term
relationships was limited. Her lack of
"baggage" was refreshing, to say the least. • •• • • •• • • •• • • • • •• • •• • • • • •• • • •• • • •• • • • •• • • • •• • • •• • • •
As a novice, Lauren was open to assessing
how best to navigate any issues that arose;
At the time this article was written,
Lauren and I decided to hold our wedding
I had years of intense therapy that guided
on December 17, 2016, before the US
me to address our bumps in a healthy way.
As a sexual and religious minority, I have
presidential inauguration. This decision
was not born of fear; rather, we knew for
always done my best to educate myself
on issues that impact people of color. Still,
certain that this timing was always meant to
until Lauren came into my life, I didn't really
be. This was the moment we'd been waiting
grok the all-encompassing reality of racism
for. After all, the personal is political, and
in our world. I now notice more, from the
vice versa.•
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LANDMARK
LESBIANS
How two real-life lesbians
inspired a statue at Stonewall.
BY BRIAN KANTZ
I PORTRAIT BY DONNA VICTOR
A few years back, legendary English
actors Sir Ian McKellen and Sir Patrick
Stewart took to the streets of Manhattan
on a warm autumn day. In town to headline
revivals of No Man's Land and Waiting for
Godot, the two decided to add the role of
tourist to their repertoires.
They strolled from
landmark to
landmark, chatting with fellow pedestrians
and snapping photos along the way. Their
journey eventually led to Christopher Park,
a small wedge of Greenwich Village green
space that is the site of Gay Liberation, the
preeminent American monument to the
gay liberation movement.
McKellen and Stewart sat on the
monument's bench, bookending the
lacquered bronze figures of two women
touching hands, and mugged for the
camera. Stewart promptly tweeted the
image to his 2 million followers with the
simple message "Stonewall!"
Those seeing the tweet surely recognized
the actors. But what about the sculpture?
Who are those women? And what makes
their story so important that it is forged in
bronze for the ages?
The answer: Leslie Cohen and Beth
Suskin modeled for the sculpture-and
their story started at Buffalo State College.
Buffalo State College, Freshman Move-In
Day,1965
Leslie Cohen's mother recognized the
voice immediately. Not someone she knew
personally, but someone she was very
familiar with-a fellow Jewish mother.
"Where you from?" she asked, setting
one foot inside a neighboring Bishop Hall
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dorm room, no invitation expected or
required.
"Hewlett Harbor!" Beth Suskin's mother
looked up and replied.
"Oh, really? Did you just arrive?"
"Yes:'
"Is your daughter a freshman, too?"
"Yes:'
"Oh, maybe you two can be friends,
Les;' Cohen's mother said, turning to her
mortified daughter.
That's it. That's how LeslieCohen and Beth
Suskin met. Just like so many freshmen who
meet on their very first day on campusat the mercy of their embarrassing but
well-intentioned parents-and then stay
connected for years, decades, a lifetime.
College Days, 1965-1967
After the Move-In Day introduction,
Cohen and Suskin did, in fact, become
friends, just as Cohen's mother had hoped.
The two initially connected over music,
sharing a love for R&B,Motown, and jazz.
Cohen and Suskin had fun together
freshman year, but not everything was
rosy. They had arrived at college under very
different circumstances, and they were still
just teenagers. Cohen chose Buffalo State to
get away-far away-from her life in Queens
and her parents' vitriolic relationship. She
reveled in her newfound freedom and loved
the social interaction she found on campus.
Suskin, on the other hand, had left her high
school boyfriend behind to go to college.
Despite the 400 miles between them,
the boyfriend kept close tabs on Suskin,
calling daily and incessantly inquiring about
budding friendships. Feeling as though
she were under CIA surveillance, Suskin
retreated from college social life. And her
isolation led to depression.
"We didn't speak over the summer
break, and during the first semester of our
sophomore year, I would occasionally see
her in the halls, but we were like strangers;'
Cohen said. "It was difficult because I
missed her and, even worse, I knew she
missed me:'
The free-spirited Cohen flew to Italy
the second semester of her sophomore
year to participate in the college's popular
study-abroad program in Siena. When
she returned, she learned that Suskin had
officially transferred to Hofstra University to
be closer to her boyfriend.
New York City, 1969
Cohen graduated from Buffalo State in
1969, the year Neil Armstrong walked on
the moon. The year they began the Vietnam
War draft lottery. The year Ted Kennedy
drove off the bridge near Chappaquiddick.
The year "Broadway Joe" Namath called his
Super Bowl win. The year of the Manson
murders. The year Jimi Hendrix nationalanthemed Woodstock. The year the
Stonewall riots started the gay liberation
movement in the United States.
Seriously, what didn't happen in 1969?
Cohen decided to immerse herself in
artistic chaos amid the societal chaos and
enrolled at Queens College in New York City
to pursue a master's degree in art history,
where she studied surrealism and Dadaism.
She also read books by Colette and Ana·is
Nin, who wrote openly about their affairs
with other women, and articles by Betty
Friedan and Gloria Steinem, who wrote
about women's liberation and Sapphic love.
Her mind swam. She grew up in the
1950s, a time when every girl was expected
to get married-to a man, it went without
saying-have children, and live happily ever
after as a housewife. The white picket fence
of expectations. But that no longer seemed
to be what she expected for herself. She
didn't fit that mold.
Meanwhile, Suskin had already started
that expected life. After leaving Buffalo
State, she married her boyfriend in 1967
when she was 19 years old. Although it
worked at first, the marriage eventually
buckled under the weight of her husband's
jealousy. "His paranoia made me more
mentally ill than I already was," said
Suskin, who stopped singing for 11 years
because her husband couldn't handle the
attention she gained from being on stage.
"I could have no eye contact with anybody,
because if I did, he would accuse me of
having an affair. I stayed in my bed for six
years after we married. I had my beautiful
standard poodle, Damien, with me all the
time. He was my sole source of emotional
connection:'
It was the most painful time of Suskin's
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59
life. But things would change for Suskinand for Cohen.
Opening of Sahara, 1976
After grad school, Cohen landed a
dream job at Artforum magazine and later
became curator of the New York Culture
Center. There she worked with well-known
artists, writers, culturati, and a lot of very,
very rich people. This public, glamorous
art life contrasted with her private, not-soglamorous gay life. After her first intense,
romantic relationship with another woman
ended, Cohen mourned the loss for a
year, but then realized that the hurt she
felt confirmed what she knew to be true.
"I was free-liberated in a way that I had
never experienced before;' she said. "I no
longer felt shame about being a lesbian.
Accepting my sexuality helped unleash
me from society's constraints of gender
and role playing and both defined me and
emboldened me:'
She began accompanying friends
to gay bars, which had effectively been
outlawed and, therefore, were operated in
the shadows by the mafia. The mob ran the
clubs without liquor licenses or a thought
toward sanitation. Entering a gay bar in
the '60s was like entering a bar during the
Prohibition era-back alleys, secret knocks,
and the ever-looming threat of police raids.
Cohen and her friends soon tired of
the scene. That was no way to live, they
thought. So they did what young, hip,
college-educated people do-they stayed
up late into the night and devised a plan
and identified a funding source. The plan?
Cohen, Michelle Florea, Linda Goldfarb,
and Barbara Russo would open New York
City's first women's club, showcasing
women in art, politics, and music. It would
be revolutionary. It would be stylish and
upscale. "A club created by women for
women," read the opening invitation. They
called it Sahara, an oasis in the desert of
conformity-in May 1976 at a highly visible
location in Manhattan's fashionable Upper
EastSide. And what a club it was.
Sahara hosted big-name celebrities,
up-and-coming entertainers, influential
politicians, and thousands upon thousands
of everyday women and men who swooned
over the club's Italian sectional couches,
swaying palm trees, rain lights, pumping
sound system, and world-class collection
of wall-to-wall artwork, curated by Cohen. "I
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wanted to increase our visibility, to educate
the outside world that lesbians existed in
all shapes and sizes, to extinguish the false
notions and stereotypes so that we would
not be so foreign to them," Cohen said.
College Reunion (of Sorts), 1976
A few weeks before Sahara opened,
Cohen received a phone call from Dottie
Coyne, a friend from Buffalo State who
worked in Manhattan's garment district.
"You are not going to believe who's here
with me right now;' Coyne said. "Beth
Suskin from Buffalo State! She came in for a
job interview and I just hired her!"
Cohen nearly dropped the phone. Beth
Suskin. Beth Suskin. Beth Suskin was backand no longer married. A few days after the
phone call, Cohen hosted a reunion at her
fourth-story walk-up for Coyne. Cohen and
Suskin talked for hours that night, catching
up on 11 years apart. It was a wonderful,
glorious second chance. They both knew it.
Cohen and Suskin eventually got
together in 1977, after a whirlwind of
circumstances, ancillary relationships,
"should-we-or-shouldn't-we?" head games,
societal pressures, and back-and-forth, raw,
vulnerable letters-or, as Cohen called it,
the "maelstrom of love:'
A Monument Unveiled
Sahara closed after four years, when
the property's owner-who
had plans
to develop the high-rise into high-rent
apartments-stopped cashing the club's
rent checks and surreptitiously forced
them out of their lease. The club's partners
didn't have the financial means to fight the
battle in court, but they did leave a powerful
legacy as the owners of an establishment
that changed many hearts and minds
during a pivotal time in American history.
Which takes us back to Christopher Park
and the Gay Liberation monument. Two
weeks before Saharawas padlocked, Cohen
received a call from David Boyce, a friend
from the art world. He said that George
Segal, the nation's most prominent
figurative sculptor, who had just
completed Abraham and Isaac,
the Kent State
memorial,
had been commissioned
again by the Mildred
Andrews
Fund
to
create a sculpture
commemorating
the Stonewall uprising of 1969. Boyce
had thought of Cohen-strong-willed,
proud, outspoken-and
was delighted
to learn that both she and her partner,
Suskin, were equally ready for this historic
assignment. "We have always received
incredible feedback about our relationship;'
Suskin said. "Love is contagious. People
see love and it's hard to be aggressive or
antagonistic."
Although the sculpture was proposed in
1979 and received community and design
approvals by 1982, public opposition and
a planned renovation of the park delayed
the sculpture's installation for 13 years. New
York City Mayor David Dinkins unveiled the
monument in 1992.
On June 24, 2016, President Barack
Obama
recognized
the
historical
significance of the 7.7-acre Greenwich
Village site by naming it Stonewall National
Monument, the first gay rights site to be
designated as a national monument and
part of the National Park Service.
"We consider it such an incredible honor
to have sat for this monument and to have
our story be connected to the larger story;'
Suskin said. "All these years later, we still
can't believe it. When we're in New York
City, we'll sit across from the sculpture and
just watch people interact with it. Kids climb
all over it. Grown men and women cry in
front of it. It's very moving:'
Cohen and Suskin married in October
2015 in Florida, 50 years after meeting at
Buffalo State and 39 years since becoming
a couple. For Leslie Cohen and Beth Suskin,
the meaning of life is simple. The meaning
of life is love.
Adapted from a story that originally
appeared in 1300 Elmwood, the alumni
magazine of Buffalo State College.
n any discussion of "older women" in
the entertainment industry, Helen Mirren's name is sure to come up. In fact,
she leads by example in and out of
Hollywood-women everywhere see
her as a role model and as someone to hold
up as proof of how to age authentically.
I remember seeing Helen Mirren speak
at a New York Times TimesTalks event in
December 2015 and thinking how classically beautiful she was, how she embodied
a timeless and a thoroughly modern sense
of class. There was her gorgeous black
dress, which clung to her hourglass figure.
Her black patent-leather Mary Janes. Her
trademark ash-blond silver bob. And her
unmistakable trio of facial features-the
gimlet eyes, a nose that always seems to be
making a point, and a mouth that can be at
once sensual and severe.
At 71 years of age she is a knockout.
Earthy and yet elegant-she's
played
Queen Elizabeth II on the screen and
the stage. In part, she is suited to playing
women with power because she is British
and has studied at the Royal Shakespeare
Company. Director Julie Taymor saw fit to
cast Mirren as Prospera in her 2010 film
adaptation of Shakespeare's The Tempest,
giving Mirren the formerly male lead role
of Prospero. That sense of status you dis-
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cern in her is both innate and inherited.
Dame Helen Mirren was born llyena Lydia
Mironoff, the granddaughter of a Russian
count who lost everything during the 1917
Bolshevik Revolution. Her spirit is no doubt
a legacy of her parents, who spent their
youth enduring the Great Depression and
the Second World War in London, which
was by all accounts a grim place to be. But
beyond a "stiff upper lip" and all that, Mirren chose openness and joy early in life. At
a young age she decided to be independent, especially financially, as her parents
advised, but also to be creative, strong, and
beautiful, and that none of these qualities
need exclude any of the others.
Fiercely intelligent and discerning, Mirren understands the power of "yes:' And by
choosing a great variety of roles during her
career, she's never become typecast. "My
roles became much more interesting after
I hit 40 than they were before;' she said at
TimesTalks.Two approaches helped her immensely, she said. The first was just hanging in there and rolling with the industry's
punches, and the second was returning
to her great love and training ground-the
theatre-every three or four years.
Her enduring appeal has also to do with
her intelligent approach to acting. The
characters she chooses are strong, but
their strength is manifest in their vulnerabilities and their ambivalence. She has
this approach in common with her contemporaries Meryl Streep, Jessica Lange,
and Isabelle Huppert. "We're all vulnerable,
complex, insecure people-all of us. That's
our job as actors, to reflect the nature of
humanity."
Famous for her Oscar- and Tony-winning portrayals of QE2, she is best known
to lesbians as Detective Jane Tennison, the
alcoholic alpha-female in the gritty British
police procedural series Prime Suspect.
"I leapt at it," she says of the role. "God,
yes! And then I became very proactive in
guiding it along and keeping it rooted in
reality and ordinariness. Making sure Jane
remained in the real world:'
Prime Suspect aired from 1991 to 2006,
as Tennison rises from detective inspector to detective superintendent; Mirren's
portrayal influenced a generation of "hardboiled" female characters in shows such as
The Closer and Law & Order. When asked
in 2015 what she imagined her character
might be doing now, Mirren responded,
"She's a lesbian, living with a very attractive
female partner:' Music to our ears!
Alas for us, Mirren herself is by all accounts straight and has spent the past 31
years with the director Taylor Hackford;
FEATURES/COVER
they divide their time between homes in
Los Angeles and Puglia, Italy.
Since Prime Suspect, Mirren has worked
constantly and seems to have had her pick
of roles. At print time, she has four films in
pre- and post-production with her most recent releases including Trumbo, Woman In
Gold, Eye in the Sky, and Collateral Beauty.
In the military thriller Eye in the Sky Mirren
plays Col. Katherine Powell, an intelligence
officer in command of a top-secret droneled operation that identifies suicide bombers in Kenya. However, she is faced with
a tough decision between capture or kill
when a supposedly innocent girl enters the
target zone occupied by terrorists planning
their next strike. In something completely different, Collateral Beauty, released at
Christmas, features Mirren as Brigitte, a
theatrical character with a unique relationship to a troubled advertising executive
played by Will Smith.
Tell us about your most recent film,
Collateral Beauty.
It's a wonderful film with some dark
themes, but told in a very optimistic and
inspired way. Will Smith is the star and he's
very good in it. The story shows us how
something beautiful can still happen even
after some ugly events.
There seems to be no stopping you! Interesting roles in good films just keep on
coming.
I learned a long time ago that you need
to play very different roles in order to avoid
being confined to any one category or type
of character. This is what has helped me to
continue finding interesting work over the
past 20 years or so. I wasn't really expecting
to be able to work so much and I'm still very
excited by the kinds of characters I've been
getting to play.
(f)
~
Was a role like Jane Tennison instrumental in raising your profile in Hollywood?
I'm sure it helped but you can never
know, really. I honestly can't explain why
things have worked out so well. There is
certainly an element of luck in all this, but
I also believe that it was the kinds of roles
I chose to play which has also helped me.
When it comes to choosing the next role,
I usually try to find something opposite to
what I've just played. And over the years,
I've always been inclined towards taking
risks and playing extravagant or extreme
characters. Playing in a film like RED,for example. I think as an actor it's important to
shake the tree a little.
Are you as enthusiastic as ever about
your career?
I'm having a lot of fun getting to do all
kinds of movies. I love working in movies,
I love going to movies, and I enjoy being
able to be part of both big and small films,
working on action movies or doing very serious dramas. I'm open to all kinds of stories
and I hope to keep having opportunities to
work with wonderful actors and directors.
Many people cite your career as an example of how women should be able to
find good roles at any age.
There's more acceptance of women now in different roles and we need
to keep telling more stories about
women and wherewomen can occupy
STORY
significant parts.
In your previous film, Eye in the Sky, you
play a senior military officer. Is that a role
that might not have gone to a woman five
years ago?
Would it have gone to a woman five
years ago-probably not. I play a military
colonel who is a woman in charge of a
very important mission. She's presented as
someone who is just as capable of making
important military decisions as a man-and
also capable of being just as unscrupulous
in doing so. I think what's responsible for
giving women more opportunities in Hollywood is that we're seeing more women
in the real world who are occupying important positions, running companies, and
being influential in many ways. Films are
going to keep reflecting the way women's
roles in society are changing and gaining in
importance.
Mirren means business in RED
I THINK AS AN
ACTOR IT'S
IMPORTANT
TO SHAKE
THE TREE A
LITTLE
Do you think that women are still unfairly
objectified because of their age or their
appearance?
Of course! We're constantly being
judged by our looks in ways that don't apply to me. When I was younger the aesthetic model for British girls was Twiggy and I
suffered because of that, because I was
never stick thin like that. Women are constantly being subjected to the pressure and
stress of needing to conform to a particular
physical type.
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Did you always want to act?
What sparked my interest was a staging
of Hamlet I saw when I was 14 or 15 years
old. It was an amateur production, so it
left a lot to be desired, but I was absolutely
amazed with the world that Shakespeare
created and the excitement of theatre in
general. That sparked my interest in Shakespeare, and after that I started working in
plays in high school. My theatre teacher
would have us do scenes from plays as
part of our classes in English literature and
French literature. I enjoyed that a lot and
always wanted to participate. That was the
point when I started to dream about the
possibility of becoming an actress.
Describe yourself when you first started
your career working in the theatre.
I was very idealistic and I had very specific ideas about acting and performance
that fortunately dissipated with age. But
the motivation was always the same: telling
stories as a way of inspiring an audience. I
was also ambitious and I was determined to
gain recognition. I worked a year with Peter Brook and it was very educational. I also
realized that if your want to have a good
career you need to find projects where
people are going to remember your name
and that there needs to be something striking or compelling about the nature of your
role.
Would you like to do more theatre?
I try to go back to the stage every three
or four years. Theatre will always be important to me. It probably stems from a sense
of guilt. In Britain, there is still this idea that
a real actor needs to do theatre.
After you won an Oscar for The Queen,
did it give you an added sense of security
or validation as an artist?
There's always insecurity and doubt in
this profession. It's just inevitable. In many
cases, those projects where I feel I've done
my best work have not necessarily been
the most successful. You can never predict which films are going to turn out well
or those where everything goes wrong.
Every film and every performance you
give is subject to interpretation, and no
performance is ever perfect. So that keeps
you on edge and it inspires you to keep
pushing yourself.•
66SAPPHO LIVESI
70BRIDESON THE CAPE
74MUJERESWITH PRIDE
68
A SOJOURN IN
SANTA FE
curve
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The timeless
beauty and historic
significance
of Greece.
BY CYD STURGESS
For as long as I can remember, I have
been fascinated by the mythological
world of Ancient Greece. So, when the
opportunity arose for an early summer
getaway to Athens, even Heracles couldn't
hold me back.
Arriving at Athens International Airport,
I'm surprised by the mildness of the
evening. Knowing that temperatures in the
capital can reach a stifling 99°F in August,
the balmy June sunshine and light breeze
is refreshing after the plane journey. I pick
up my bulging suitcase and opt for a taxi to
Kolonaki, the district closest to the Hilton
hotel where I'm staying. Those who can
bear to leave the extra pair of Birkenstocks
at home will find that the bus and metro
offer cheaper alternatives to reach the
city centre.
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In the taxi, I watch as the dilapidated
stores and buildings on the outskirts slowly
transform into stylish and sophisticated
bars in the centre, revealing a chic,
cosmopolitan cityscape. By the time I've
dropped my bag in my room, the sun has
faded and I head to the rooftop bar to
catch a glimpse of the ancient Acropolis,
now lit by a sumptuous evening skyline.
After some shameless Snapchatting,
walk to
restaurant
Cookoovaya
(cookoovaya.gr), named after "the owl"symbol of Athens. The open kitchen shows
the chefs working hard-everything at this
Greek fusion restaurant is made fresh on
site-and the tuna steak I order is one of
the best I've had.
I start the next day in an equally opulent
manner; with a languid dip in the pool,
followed by a heavenly bowl of honeyed
prunes and Greek yoghurt-what else?before catching the metro to Monastiraki:
the heart of the city. At the station, I notice
the merging of modern and ancient
architecture that characterizes the capital;
Monastiraki is one of several stations that
boasts an archaeological excavation
site. If that wasn't enough to get you
underground, the metro is the fastest and
cheapest way to get around the city, with
tickets costing an average €1.40.
Although it's early, the sun is already
beaming down on Greece's most famous
tourist attraction and I grab a muchneeded bottle of water before I begin my
ascent to the ancient citadel. Entering
the Acropolis through the impressive
Propylaea gateway, I catch sight of the
Parthenon; the temple dedicated to the
goddess Athena. (Legend has it, Athena
and Poseidon tried to win over the city's
inhabitants at the Acropolis by offering
them various gifts in a bid to become the
city's patron. No prizes for guessing who
won that competition.)
After drinking in the splendor of the
Pnyx hill, birthplace of democracy, I visit
the Acropolis museum. Designed as a
FEATURES/
direct mirror of the Parthenon, the huge
windows fill it with natural light. Upstairs,
the cafe offers panoramic views of the
historic hills and on Friday evenings it
comes alive with jazz performances.
G(r)eek-out complete, 10 minutes from
the Acropolis I dine out at vegetarian
and
vegan
restaurant
Avocado
(avocadoathens.com),
where
almost
everything on the menu is locally sourced,
seasonal and organic. Necking a zingy kiwi
and ginger smoothie, I stroll through the
Plaka, a picturesque quarter decorated
with beautiful boughs of bougainvillea,
before heading to lesbian-owned wine bar
and restaurant By The Glass (bytheglass.
gr) in the Syntagma area. Here, I submit
to my Dionysian desires and slake my
thirst into the early hours with the bar's
extensive-and delicious-wine selection.
The following morning, I wake up
slightly worse for wear and, attempting to
make amends with my body, I check into
the peaceful Hammam Baths (hammam.
gr). Entering the beautiful marble steam
bath, I soothe my symptoms with salts and
lotions before cooling down with some
fruit tea and sweet treats.
Rejuvenated and relaxed, I leave the
Hammam and head to hip international
eatery Mama Roux. After devouring
their famous "hush-puppies" (cornmeal
croquettes served with chutney and
Creole mayo), the shrimp tacos, doused in
chili yogurt, lime and guacamole, are the
perfect light lunch. Myrovolos, just across
town, is another popular food-stopwhich at night also turns into a busy bar for
girls who like girls.
Speaking of which, I arrive at Platia
Kotzia just in time to catch the start of the
Athens Pride parade. It is a relatively young
festival and I'm surprised by the sheer
numbers gathered. As the crowds pass by,
the placards supporting LGBT+ migrants,
queers of color, and trans and gender
non-conforming people make it one of
the most inclusive parades I've seen. Not
yet commercialized, it's clear that the
focus remains fully on Athens' colorful and
vibrant queer community.
Instead of joining the crowd, my
friends and I take a trip to the Clumsies
(theclumsies.gr)
to
sample
their
experimental
cocktail
menu before
hopping on the metro to Kerameikos for a
night at Athens' most famous lesbian club:
Noiz. With '90s classics and funky Greek
hits, the club is jumping and it's a great end
to our Pride celebrations.
The morning after the night before is
shakier than usual with a two-hour ferry
journey from Piraeus port. Arriving at the
secluded and luxurious island of Hydra,
however, I soon forget the undulating
ocean voyage. Famous as a bustling
bohemian hub in the early 20th century,
Hydra later became a favorite retreat of
the Rolling Stones and Pink Floyd, and I
can see why.
With cars and motor vehicles prohibited
by law, the entire island exudes a serene
tranquillity. After a few busy days in the
Greek capital, a weekend on this idyllic
island is just what the doctor ordered.
I spend an afternoon idling in the sun,
peeking in the quaint boutiques along
the port, and visiting Hydra's Historical
Archive. As evening closes in, we enjoy
waterfront restaurant Castello, where
glamorous owner Iliana eagerly shows
us the private beach where they recently
celebrated their first gay wedding service.
TRAVEL
With the sun setting on my last evening
in Greece, I take in the view before me.
Despite the heartache of the migrant
crisis and the financial strain that has
burdened the country over the past
decade, I have seen an entrepreneurial
spirit blossoming in Athens, and a Pride
parade that made the streets come alive.
I don't know when I'll next return to
Greece but when I do, I'll make sure
to bring my own Aphrodite with me.
Who knows, soon Iliana might be telling
guests about the Sapphic ceremony she
witnessed on their beach.•
A painting of Sappho by eroticist
Edouard-Henri Avril depicting the
lesbian sexual practices apparently inspired by the Greek poet.
Today, you can't really carry around a
lyre to indicate that you are Sapphically
inclined. However, there is another
more fashionable option. The Sappho
necklace was created by Ali Greenberg
to make it easier for you, and for women
you might meet socially, to identify
each other. "Because I am femme and
also attracted to them, it was nearly
impossible to meet someone without
risking the sheer embarrassment
of hitting on a straight girl," explains
Greenberg. Her creation, the Sappho
necklace is a lucky charm when dating
in Straightsville or in our increasingly
The Sappho
necklace
blended community where identities are
not always easy to discern. It also makes a
great gift for the single lesbian in your life,
or for your valentine. (sappho.life)
FEB/MAR
2017
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Santa Fe's tag line is "The City Different"
and, sure enough, it's not like anywhere
I've ever been. It holds strong appeal
for lesbians, being a place that respects
the unconventional while preserving its
historic roots. It's also a font of creativity;
it's the second-largest art market in the
US and many artists choose to live here,
including brilliant abstract painter Rose
Masterpol. Popular standup comic and
activist Dana Goldberg is a New Mexico
native, starting the Annual Southwest
Funnyfest in nearby Albuquerque over
ten years ago.
The cultural capital of The Land of
Enchantment, Santa Fe has galleries,
gift shops, gourmet restaurants, iconic
architecture,
landmark
properties,
and high-end and budget retail, as
well as a mesmerizing history and rich
indigenous culture. A world capital of
silver, turquoise and Native American
ceramics, UNESCO honored Santa Fe by
naming it one of only 19 crafts and folk
art Creative Cities in the world. Satisfy
your inner collector and check out the
Museum of Indian Art and Culture and
its unique collection of pottery, jewelry,
textiles, and paintings; or just browse
the 250 galleries in town. But really, the
FEATURES/
whole city is a work of art: landscape
and streetscape form a uniqueness that
was embraced when New Mexico gained
statehood in 1912.
Where to stay? The centrally-located
La Fonda On the Plaza (lafondasantafe.
com) is a palatial adobe hotel built in
the Spanish-Pueblo Revival style and
since 1922 it's been the social pulse of
the town. This romantic property makes
the perfect location for an anniversary
or a wedding; it boasts the city's largest
ballroom and the event spaces are
decorated with fireplaces, chandeliers,
and original Southwest art. It's also
conveniently located to the galleries
of Canyon Road and the nearby market
square where you can bargain for
authentic, handmade Native American
Indian goods. And it's an easy walk to the
Georgia O'Keeffe Museum (gokm.org),
which pays tribute to an artist who lived
life and created art on her own terms.
An iconic American, O'Keeffe's works
and her image have always held great
appeal for lesbians. She considered New
Mexico to be her spiritual home, "the
most wonderful place you can imagine."
Anywhere in Santa Fe will mix you
a delish margarita, but have one and
some scrumptious bar bites at La Fiesta
Lounge, the lobby bar of la Fonda, which
has been restored to its "desert deco"
glory. Santa Fe is thought to be the first
export destination of Mexican tequila
and, to honor this, the local tourism
folks have created a Margarita Trail so
that you can discover the town's unique
mixology. Pick up your "passport" from
the Downtown Visitor Center and get
ready to enjoy 31 margaritas made with
100% agave tequila from participating
restaurants. But be careful: Santa
Fe is 7200 feet above sea level and
alcohol metabolizes differently at high
altitudes. So drink slowly! And eat.
The food is distinctive and delicious,
from appetizers such as grilled corn,
tamales, or fried peppers to heartier fare.
A source of local pride is the influence
of pueblo Indian cooking, such as
breads freshly baked in beehive-shaped
outdoor ovens. And of course red and
green chile; you'll soon be requesting a
side of green chile with everything you
order! There's an unofficial Santa Fe
Chocolate Trail showcasing the region's
finest chocolatiers.
A day trip out of town puts you in
New Mexico wine country. The first
vines were planted there in 1629 by two
monks, that's about 150 years ahead
of California. There are currently over
60 wineries and tasting rooms in New
Mexico for you to enjoy, but beer drinkers
have not been overlooked: pick up the
local beer map produced by the New
Mexico Brewers Guild and find some new
brews. Work off those calories by taking
an outdoor hike in O'Keeffe country, or
wander the Foothill Trails, which can also
be experienced by bike or on horseback.
For something totally different explore
the new immersive art museum Meow
RED CHILE SAUCE
Red Chile is one of the staple
components of many recipes in
New Mexican Cuisine and can be
used on lots of different dishes
including meat and vegetables.
Hearty, spicy, mellow in flavor and
deliciously warm, especially in
winter, it goes particularly well with
chicken enchiladas. This recipe
comes courtesy of the Santa Fe
School of Cooking.
TRAVEL
Wolf (meowwolf.com), which is backed
by Game of Thrones creator and Santa
Fe resident George R.R. Martin and will
spark many deep conversations about
what it all means.
Winter can be a great time to visit, with
acres of ski-worthy terrain that receive
an average of 225 inches of snow. Or
visit in summer for Pride, which is held in
late June. Hosted by the Santa Fe Human
Rights Alliance (santafehra.org) enjoy
the parade and a vibrant street festival
including information and networking
booths, live entertainment and an art
show featuring artwork by the local LGBT
community. (santafe.org) •
Ingredients:
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1/2 cup finely diced onion
2-3 tsp minced garlic
2
tbs all purpose flour
1/2 cup pure ground New Mexican
red chile powder
21/2 cups water or chicken stock
1 tsp Mexican oregano
1/2 tbs freshly ground cumin seed
salt to taste
Method:
Heat the oil in a medium saucepan and saute the onion for 3 to 4 minutes, until
softened. Add the garlic and saute 2 minutes more. Stir in the flour, the chile, and
slowly add the water, whisking to break up any lumps in the chile. Add the oregano
and the cumin, and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat and simmer for about 20 minutes,
or until the mixture has thickened slightly. Season with salt to taste. Enjoy!
FEB/MAR
2017
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For over 50 years, gays and lesbians
have flocked to Provincetown on Cape Cod
for summer vacation. Primarily a pilgrim
colony and fishing village, it became an art
colony in the 1880s, with painters drawn to
P-town's light and picturesque landscape.
By the first half of the 20th century, a
good percentage of resident and visiting
artists were gay and lesbian-dramatists,
poets, and performers, and they spread
word that it was an ideal summer place for
gays and lesbians. By the '70s and '80s,
gay-owned inns and guesthouses sprang
up; stores, restaurants, bars, parties and
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FEATURES/
performance spaces added to the pride
of place, feeling of safety, sense of identity
and self-expression. Parts of town became
especially gay and/or lesbian, such as the
clothing optional Herring Cove Beach, or
more for guys (the West End), or for the
girls (the East End). And before long, there
were enough lesbians visiting P-town to
create a market for programmed events.
Lynette Molnar moved to Provincetown
in 1995, but she had been going there since
before she was of legal drinking age. Molnar
grew up in Pittsburgh and lived for some
time in San Francisco, but Provincetown's
"drop dead gorgeous beauty, absolute
gayness, and the gentleness, quiet,
sense of ease and safety" all keep her in
P-town where she owns a house and runs
ProvincetownForWomen.com.
"There is nowhere in the world like
Provincetown, and nowhere that has
such power and visibility for lesbians,"
says Molnar. "Even on a day when there
are straight daytrippers, we are the town,
and there's a certain empowerment in
that. Everyone on the LGBTQ spectrum
is welcome here and everyone on that
spectrum is safe here."
Lesbians in particular are visible, from
artists, to business owners, to those
representing government. And Molnar
is one of those artist-businesswomen.
An avid photographer, her subject is
"the gloriously beautiful landscapes, the
changing lightshow, the seasons, and the
activities and signs that make up those
seasons. I continue to be exhilarated by it
every single day." A former innkeeper, she
now focuses on producing events during
Women's Week in October, and offers
four summer highlights for women: Single
Women's Weekend (May 19-21), Memorial
Day Weekend (May 25-29), Women of
Color Weekend (June 1-4) and Girl Splash
(July 18-22). "The summer starts with
Memorial Day and the 20-somethings,"
says Molnar, "and Girl Splash draws the
middle-age range. Women's Week has
tended to skew older. That said, every age
group is represented every day here and I
think that's pretty amazing and beautiful."
This year at Women's Week she noticed
many new female faces and a new energy,
too. A highlight of the week was the soldout show Women's Week IDOL, which she
produces. It features singing contestants
and encourages improvisation between
hosts, performers and audience to
produce an electric sense of sisterhood.
Also notable is the camaraderie between
the hosts, which include the nation's top
lesbian standup comics such as Kate
Clinton and Vickie Shaw. "I am so moved
by these women," says Molnar. "I have
never experienced that kind of true,
noncompetitive support in any other
environment or field I've been in."
This special atmosphere is evident to
newer owner-innkeepers Alli Baldwin and
Ilene Mitnick. Their charming, Frenchthemed, 6-room inn, Roux Bed & Breakfast
(rouxprovincetown.com), is not only an inn,
but the base for Bride Pride: The World's
Largest Lesbian Wedding. The inaugural
event was held on October 15, 2016 and
106 women (53 couples from 15 states and
Canada) gathered on the property's front
lawn to take vows. Some women married
for the first time; others renewed their
vows, such as Fran Dunaway and Naomi
Gonzalez of clothing label TomboyX.
"What was most moving and beautiful
to us was witnessing the reaction of
women from states where it might be legal
to marry, but not necessarily comfortable,"
says Baldwin. "The town opened its heart
and soul to these women."
"Provincetown is about love, equality
and acceptance and it's meant to be
shared with lovers," says Mitnick. "Even
when we were mired in the logistics
of planning the event, we were everconscious of what was going to happen
here-that
there would be over one
hundred women simultaneously saying 'I
do' in the state where gay marriage was
first legalized," adds Baldwin. "It was a
gorgeous sight. Lives changed. The lawn
was glowing the morning after."
But as fabulous as it was, the first Bride
Pride fell short of its Guinness Book of
World Records goal of 100 couples. Bride
Pride 2017 is poised to set that record on
July 22 during Girl Splash at the height
of summer. (The earlier date reflects
community concern over the presidential
election, with some couples expressing
a desire to marry sooner rather than
later.) "We're thrilled to be able to offer
up the opportunity to women to discover
Provincetown and marry against the
backdrop of the most accepting place in
the country," says Mitnick.
Should you plan to visit with your bridal
TRAVEL
party and find that Roux is already full, stay
instead at the lesbian-owned Seaglass Inn &
Spa (seaglassinnandspa.com). Proprietors
Nadine and Faith Licostie have revamped a
large hotel offering amenities such as a spa
treatment center and inground pool set
among gardens. It's an easy downhill walk
to the lovely restaurants of the West End
and there's plenty of parking on property
if you came via car.
In addition to traveling to Provincetown
to marry, do explore the sand dunes
and breathe in the salty air. In season,
take a relaxing and romantic sail with
Moment
Sailing (momentsailing.com)
and the delightful Capt. Chris Bartick.
This intimate experience on a beautiful
small-to-medium-sized yacht with friendly
commentary and a young skipper showing
off one of his favorite harbors is a thrill.
Take a relaxing sunset dune tour
(artsdunetours.com) and enjoy a clambake
on the quiet and pristine beach (weather
permitting). See the famous dune shacks
and learn about artistic and aquatic life.
Wander the East End gallery district
on Commercial Street and drop into
Provincetown Art Association and Museum
(paam.org), which has been nurtured to
excellence by its energetic and dedicated
executive director Christine McCarthy, or
pick up a gift at the lesbian-owned and
operated Womencrafts, a feminist fixture
for 40 years. Take a guided historic walking
tour of Pilgrim Monument, which is the
most stunning vertical landmark on the
Cape Cod peninsula to discover how this
paradise first began.
"I absolutely see the possibility of
Provincetown as a lesbian destination
continuing with younger women," says
Molnar. "They respond to being here
in the same way that I did decades
ago. Newcomers, no matter what their
ages, truly have the same reaction to
Provincetown the first time: they're blown
away, and they're falling in love."•
GETTING TO AND AROUND P-TOWN
If you're not driving, take the fast ferry by
Bay State Cruise Company from Boston to
MacMillan Pier (baystatecruisecompany.
com). In P-town, pick up a bike rental at
Gale Force Bikes (galeforcebikes.com).
Grab some delicious sandwiches and cycle
to the seashore for a bracing stroll or swim.
(visit-provincetown.com)
FEB/MAR
2017
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Kelli Carpenter
Last year, R Family Vacations and Olivia
Travel-two of the best known LGBT travel
brands-partnered
to create a unique
vacation experience not just for singles and
couples, but for all lesbians, gay men, their
friends and families. They chose the Hard
Rock Hotel Vallarta in the LGBT-friendly
Mexican coastal town of Puerto Vallarta
for their July 2016 launch. According to
Kelli Carpenter, co-founder of R Family
Vacations, it was an unprecedented
success. "It was a really wonderful
partnership. All in all, people were very
happy," she says. "The entertainment was
fantastic, the resort was beautiful, and
72
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2017
the guests loved it. There was some great
feedback, which we've taken on board, and
now we'll be partnering with Olivia again
this July."
The location will also be Mexico, this time
at the all-inclusive, full charter Club Med
lxtapa Pacific. This beachfront haciendastyle family resort is uniquely positioned
to deliver the experience that R Family
and Olivia wish to offer, says Carpenterespecially in regards to parents who love
to travel with their kids but also want some
quality adult time during vacation.
"There's no staff better than a Club
Med staff," says Carpenter, "especially
their innovative club for children. The
enthusiastic and attentive G.Os, as
Club Med calls them, have diplomas or
experience in childcare, and are in charge
of the kids' club and baby program,
allowing you to feel relaxed and confident
that your children are being taken care
of-whether that's providing them their
playtime, walking, feeding, or naptimewhile you relax."
And if that sounds like a rare offering
at an affordable resort, so are the other
inclusions: free Wi-Fi, gourmet dining,
open
bar, entertainment,
activities,
and all taxes and gratuities. In such a
carefree environment, there'll be plenty of
opportunity to catch some relaxation and
romance, says Carpenter-regardless of
parenting status. "Not only is Club Med's
food delicious, but lxtapa truly has one of
the most beautiful sunsets that I've ever
seen. I'm excited to go back there, and to
have R Family working with Olivia again."
But that's not all: R Family will join forces
with another big name in travel, Celebrity
Cruises. Voted Best Premium Cruise Line
four years running, and boasting a chic
and unique onboard experience, Celebrity
Cruises is officially rolling out the rainbow
carpet. Last year the company approached
R Family founders Kelli Carpenter and
Gregg Kaminsky to curate and produce
onboard experiences specifically for LGBT
cruise groups.
DISCOVERTRUE LOVE
EXECUTIVE
GAYMATCHMAKING
FIRM
"It's the very first cruise line to offer selfproduced LGBT trips," says Carpenter.
"Gregg and I will be acting as licensed
travel agents through the TZELL Travel
Group for the LGBT individuals and groups
onboard. Our first group will be sailing to
Alaska in July, and included in the onboard
experience will be select talent tailored to
LGBTaudiences, including our Manhattanstyle piano bar player, singers, the comic
Jessica Kirson, and other talent to be
announced."
Four Celebrity Cruises per year will
cater to LGBT guests, with existing
Celebrity offerings such as the Top Chef
at Sea cooking challenge and the Taste of
Film being tweaked exclusively to them.
Celebrity Cruises already has a "big gay
and lesbian clientele," says Carpenter.
"However, we have a likemindedness
in terms
of our
preferences
in
entertainment, comedy, and even dining
that I think is different to mainstream
audiences. I'm proud of them for taking
their already excellent programming and
tailoring it to the gay and lesbian guests
onboard. Gregg and I can't wait to host
these groups and welcome everyone
aboard for a very memorable vacation at
sea." (rfamilyvacations.com) •
Club Med lxtapa, Mexico: July 8-15, 2017
Rated the #1 family resort in Mexico by Trip Advisor, this oceanfront all-inclusive
experience is big on inclusions: 8 days/7 nights accommodations, food, beverages
(including alcohol), games, most activities, and special Olivia and R Family
programming and entertainment, all-day Kids' Club activities for children of all ages;
(babies and toddlers 4 months to 3 years at an extra charge), and round-trip airport
transfers included.
LGBT Group Cruise to Alaska: July 21-28, 2017
All aboard the Celebrity Solstice-including the LGBTcommunity and their friends.
Visit scenic Alaskan highlights, plus spend an evening in beautiful Victoria, B.C.
Exclusive entertainment including Sail Away mixer, LGBT cruise hosts, welcome
party, NYC piano bars, special theme nights, gay and gay-friendly group dinners,
LGBT comedy, musical performer, late night "Guerrilla Gay Bars," exclusive shore
excursion, and exclusive Celebrity Cruise activities.
Bespoke Matchmaking works with
professional gay men and lesbians who
are serious about meeting the right
person and who are ready to begin a
loving relationship. Our firm provides a
highly regarded alternative to the
typical forms of dating.
Contact us to schedule
a complimentary consultation
1-888-422-6464
BESPOKEMATCHMAKING.COM
In 2017, Madrid will celebrate the
40th anniversary of its first Pride
Parade, in 1977. Madrid Pride, now a
five-day celebration, and one of the
biggest in the world, draws around
1 million people annually. Twice that
number, a whopping 2 million people,
attend the parade itself. The celebration
unfolds in the city's gay district, Chueca
(visitchueca.com), just off the Gran Via
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2017
in the city center.
Madrid Pride kicks off with the
inaugural proclamation
in the Plaza
de Pedro Zerolo and culminates with a
closing ceremony at the Plaza del Rey. In
between, and in addition to the parade,
there are over 100 Pride-related events,
from the High Heels Race-for the drag
queen in you-to guided museum tours
for LGBT visitors.
THE HOST OF WORLD PRIDE
Spain has long been a leader in gay
rights: When it legalized same-sex
marriage in 2005, it was only the third
nation in the world to do so. Currently,
Madrid has a 72-year-oldfemininstmayor,
Manuela Carmena, and she is vocally
supportive of sexual diversity. In light of
both its heritage of progressiveness and
the 40th anniversary of Pride, Spain will
host the 2017 World Pride in Madrid, with
the opening ceremony on Wednesday,
June 23, and the closing ceremony on
Sunday, July 2.
The city anticipates over 3 million
people for nearly 10 days of festivities,
so there is talk of moving Pride from
Chueca to the more open area of the
Madrid Rio Park and Matadero Madrid,
a stunning contemporary arts center
adjacent to the Manzanares River. At
print time this decision had not been
made, although the spacious Rio would
make World Pride more accessible.
While the schedule of events is still
tentative, the Human Rights Conference
is confirmed for June 26 and the World
Pride Parade is scheduled for July 1.
FEATURES/
WHERETO STAY
During my visit this past summer,
I stayed at the H10 Villa de la Reina
(H10hotels.com),
a 4-star property
conveniently located on the Gran Via.
The hotel offers a soothing ambience,
a tasteful blend of design elements, hip
lobby bar, comfy and well-equipped
rooms, free Wi-Fi, and a full breakfast
included. Don't expect a huge room
with a view: The hotel is the product of
a careful restoration of an early-20thcentury building in an old European
city, so space is at a premium. However,
everything
you
need,
including
shopping, restaurants, and the gay
neighborhood,
is right outside your
door, so get out there and enjoy it!
THINGS TO SEE AND DO
Make time to take in all the beauty
and grandeur the city affords, but with
temperatures climbing to a sweltering
100 degrees Fahrenheit in June, and
with parties going on until 7 a.m., you
have to plan your day accordingly.
There are generally two approaches,
depending on your Night Owl Status:
If you enjoy partying all night long and
sleeping through the early afternoon,
whenever you decide to begin your day,
I recommend grabbing a cafe con leche
and a churro or two and hitting one of
Madrid's spectacular museums in the
afternoon.
Begin your day with a walk through
the stunning sculpted gardens of El
Retire Park, not far from the Paseo del
Arte-the name given to Madrid's trio of
world-renowned
museums, the Reina
Soffa (museoreinasofia.es), the Prado
(museodelprado.es), and the ThyssenBornemisza (museothyssen.org).
The
Real Jardin Botanico is also beautiful
and adjacent to the Prado Museum.
If you are strapped for time and
can only visit one of these museums,
I recommend the Reina Soffa, which
holds four floors of Spanish art, mostly
concentrated
around the civil war
and modernist culture, and includes
Picasso's celebrated canvas, 'Guernica.'
Other museums worth your time
and the price of admission include the
Arqueol6gico
Nacional, the Palacio
Real, the CaixaForum museum and
cultural center, and the Naval Museumwhich holds an astounding collection of
naval artefacts from Spain's golden age
ruling the seas throughout the 15th and
TRAVEL
16th centuries.
WHERE TO EAT AND DRINK
Spanish food in summer has a fun and
communal feel. For casual food while out
and about, I recommend walking to the
Plaza Mayor, the biggest square in the
city, where you can and must taste one
of Madrid's signature foods, the Bocata
de Calamares, or calamari sandwich:
fried squid, with just a dash of olive oil,
sandwiched inside fresh-baked bread.
Craving mas comida? A block away
from the Plaza Mayor is the Mercado de
San Miguel, where you can procure the
finest of Madrid's delicacies, from olive
skewers to croquettes to gelato.
For a casual and inexpensive meal
for either lunch or dinner, Yakitoro, a
Japanese-Spanish fusion tavern, has
a menu based around charbroiled
skewers (yakitoro.com). For old world
and traditional
Spanish fare, step
back in time to Botfn Restaurant,
which was founded in 1725 (botin.es/
en). If you're old school like me, take
in dinner and a flamenco show while
in Madrid. I recommend two places
in particular: the Corral de la Morerfa
(corraldelamoreria.com)
and Cafe de
Chinitas
(en.chinitas.com).
The
dancers, singers, and guitarists at
both locations are mesmerizing.
Chinitas is walkable from the center
of the city, although you might need
to hire a taxi if you decide to go to the
Corral; it depends on the location of
your accommodation.
Madrid is a drinking city, and you
must start your night off right with
elegant cocktails and bites at the chic
La Terraza at The Principal Madrid
(theprincipalmadridhotel.com),
but
there are numerous outdoor and
rooftop bars all throughout the city.
WHERE THE GIRLS ARE
Spain is often rated the most
popular gay tourist destination in
Europe by knowledgable bloggers
and guides alike, and for good
reason: From the architecture to the
zapaterias, there's pleasure to be
found on every corner. And there's
no better time of year to go than
June, during Pride. For the single
queer female traveler, take heart in
the fact that the city is as safe as it is
pleasurable. Whether it's 2 a.m. or 2
p.m., I was not catcalled or harassed
once during my time in the cafes,
bars, or walking the streets. The
freedom of movement and sense
of fun one feels in Madrid no doubt
contributes to its popularity with the
queer community.
There are numerous events and
venues for queer women. During
2016 Pride, there were parties every
night, in addition to beloved lesbian
hotspots like Club 33 (club33madrid.
es), the oldest lesbian club in Madrid,
and Truco, a lesbian bar in the center
of Chueca, for queer women to visit.
There's also the Viva Pop Festival,
which is popular with queer and
gender-mixed
crowds. But during
Pride, people don't just party in barsthey're out in the streets. At night
during Pride, the plazas are filled
with people drinking, laughing, and
dancing-together.•
• American tourists can enter Spain and stay without a visa for up to three
months
• Mealtimes are later than in the US,with lunch served between 2 and 4 p.m.,
and dinner served between 9 and 11p.m. or sometimes later
• Spanish cityfolk are night owls: The bar scene and parties do not start jumping
until around 2 a.m. so consider taking an afternoon nap or siesta
• While the culture of the siesta is declining, finding shade indoors during the
afternoon is a must. In the summertime, the sun doesn't set in Madrid until after
10 p.m., so don't worry about losing the day if you take a siesta. The sun always
shines on sunny Madrid and the sky is always blue!
Madrid Pride: (madridorgullo.com/en}
World Pride Madrid: (worldpridemadrid2017.com
Madrid Tourism, LGBT:(esmadrid.com/en/madrid-lgbt}
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
77
TLOOK/
CROSSWORD
THE
L-OUIZ
Test your
lesbian knowledge
with our queer crossword.
BY MYLES MELLOR
ACROSS
DOWN
1.
Greek poet(ess) from Lesbos
4
The Price of Salt writer, _
Highsmith
9
Said "I do" together
10 Pulitzer Prize-winning poet,_
St. Vincent Millay
31
1. Country of Queen Christina
28 Stops along the road
2. It's mightier than the sword
30 "Don't move!" to Fido
3
Welcome
32 Resembling
4
Respectively
35 Letters on a pencil
5
Women's activist who had longterm relationship with Mary
Rozet, Jane_
36 Deny entry
38 Negative
6
Email subject line intro
7
Novelist who had relationship
with Edith Lewis, Willa_
First Lady who fell
in love with reporter
Lorena Hickok
8
Lesbian who was New York
State poet laureate, goes with
11across
46
Fur scarf
9
49
Prefix with morphosis
51
Famous '20s actress
who had a lesbian affair
with Mercedes De
Acosta
52
Congresswoman who
made the opening
speech during
Nixon's impeachment
proceedings,_
Jordan
33
Compass direction
34
Maximum degree
36
Writer of Nightwood,
classic of lesbian
fiction, Djuna _
37
Speakeasy performer
and out lesbian in the
1920s, Gladys_
11 See 8 down
13 Collar button
14 "The way" in Chinese
philosophy
15 "Come as you_"
41
16 LGBTactivist in the US who
overturned Section 3 of the
Defense of Marriage Act,_
Windsor
18 Large feather
19 12/24, for one
23 Smallest US state, abbr.
24 Expat American writer who
rote "A rose is a rose is a rose,"
Gertrude
25 Yes in the Senate or Parliament
27 Arts degree
28 Tag player
29 Partner of 24 across
Hers was the first samesex marriage in San
Fran, Del_
English novelist who was the
lover of 20 down
11 Where a small pooch might sit
12 "_ thy fair light had fled;'
Shelley
17 Believer suffix
20 Novelist and garden designer,
Sackville-West
21 New York activist, Barbara_
22 Partner of 31 across, Phyllis
24 Frodo's buddy
25 Took in
26 Barely get, with "out"
78
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
39 Zodiac's seventh sign
40 Word before real or lost
42 Boating equipment
43 Dorothy's auntie
44 Shirt's neck shape
45 Experimental area
47 "Just as I thought!"
48 Kilogram, abbr.
50 60 min.
2016 STATEMENT
OF OWNERSHIP
MARKtTPlAC
~
Publication Title: Curve
Publication No.: 0010-355
We love who you are.
Filing Date: Nov 1,2016
Issue Frequency: Bi-monthly
Feb/Mar, Apr/May, Jun/July, Aug/Sep, Oct/ Nov, Dec/Jan
Number of Issues Published Annually: 6
Annual Subscription Price: $35.00
Complete Mailing Address PO Box 467 New York NY 10034.
Contact Person: Silke Bader
Telephone: (415) 871-0569
Publisher: Silke Bader PO Box 467 New York NY 10034
Editor: Merryn Johns PO Box 467 New York NY 10034
Owner(s): Avalon Media LLC PO Box 467 New York NY
10034
Silke Bader PO Box 467 New York NY 10034
Publication Title: Curve
Issue Date for Circulation Data: Nov 24
Extent and Nature of Circulation: Average No.
Copies Each Issue During Preceding 12 Months:
A) Total No. Copies Net Press Run 47,815.B) Paid
Circulation. (By Mail and Outside the Mail) (1)
Mailed Outside-County Paid Subscriptions Stated
on Form 3541: 10,846; (2) Mailed In-County Paid
Subscriptions Stated on Form 3541: 0; (3) Paid
Distribution Outside the Mails Including Sales
_ rough Dealers and Carriers, Street Vendors,
Counter Sales, and Other Paid Distribution outside
USPS:23,258; (4) Paid Distribution by Other
Classes of Mail_ rough the USPS:2003. C) Total
Paid Distribution: 36,107 D) Free or Nominal
Rate Distribution by Mail and Outside the Mail:
(1) Free or Nominal Rate Outside-County Copies
included on Form 3541: 0; (2) Free or Nominal
Rate In-County Copies included on Form 3541: 0;
(3) Free or Nominal Rate Copies Mailed at Other
ONLYONEWOMANCAN
CLOSETHE GATESTO HELL
BUTAT WHATCOST?
Classes Mailed_ rough the USPS 61; (4) Free
or Nominal Rate Distribution Outside the Mail:
10,846. E) Total Free or Nominal Rate Distribution:
10,907. F) Total Distribution 47,014 G) Copies
Not Distributed: 801. H) Total: 47,815.I) Percent
Paid 76.8%. Extent and Nature of Circulation/No.
Copies of Single Issue Published Nearest to Filing
Date A) Total No. Copies Net Press Run: 45,543. B)
Paid Circulation. (By Mail and Outside the Mail) (1)
Mailed Outside-County Paid Subscriptions Stated
on Form 3541: 9756; (2) Mailed In-County Paid
Subscriptions Stated on Form 3541: 0; (3) Paid
Distribution Outside the Mails Including Sales
_ rough Dealers and Carriers, Street Vendors,
Counter Sales, and Other Non-USPS 21,546; (4)
Paid Distribution by Other Classes of Mail_ rough
the USPS:1800. C) Total Paid Distribution: 33,102.
D) Free or Nominal Rate Distribution (by Mail
and Outside the Mail): (1) Free or Nominal Rate
Outside-County as Stated on Form 3541: 0; (2)
Free or Nominal Rate In-County Copies included on
Form 3541: 0; (3) Free or Nominal Rate Distribution
Mailed at Other Classes_ rough the USPS:41; (4)
Free or Nominal Rate Distribution Outside the Mail:
10,946. E) Total Free or Nominal Rate Distribution:
10,987 F) Total Distribution: 44,089 G) Copies
Not Distributed: 813. H) Total: 44,902. I) Percent
Paid: 74%. Publication of Statement of
Ownership: Nov/Dec 2016
FEB/MAR
2017
CURVE
79
T LOOK/
STARS
Turn Up the Heat
Have a Happy Valentine's Day as Venus in romantic
Pisces and Mars in randy Aries amps up your love meter.
BY CHARLENE LICHTENSTEIN
Lucy Lawlesswas born
on March 29, 1968
PISCES %
%
%
This woman aches for a faithful %
relationship.She is in love with %
love and can't wait to find a %
lovergrrl with whom to share her %
%
dreams of blissful happiness. %
She loves children and avidly %
seeks a partnership with a like- %
minded woman. If you settle in %
%
with a sapphic Pisces,expect %
the pitter patter of little feet %
within the first two years,and %
I don't mean catsl Her optimism %
%
in relationships is often put to %
the test and, while she desires a %
forever, she knows when forever %
simply means for the time being. %
%
ARIES %
%
(Feb 20-March 20)
1/,
Modesty is not a strong suit with 1/,
this gal so don't be surprised if 1/,
1/,
she hangs around the house in 1/,
her undies...or less.But expect 1/,
her usual form to be more 1/,
boxer shorts than lace. The fire 1/,
1/,
of passion will always be there 1/,
but it may be camouflaged in 1/,
flannel. Hey honey, pass the 1/,
beer! Yeah,I love you too. BurpI 1/,
1/,
Make her jealous, nervous or 1/,
unsure and she'll dress in latex or 1/,
zippered black leather for you, 1/,
just to make sure that you notice 1/,
1/,
and still care.
1/,
What a charmer! 1/,
1/,
1/,
1/,
1/,
Charlene
Lichtenstein
is theauthor 1/,
of HerScopes:
A Guide
to Astrology1/,
ForLesbians
(Simon
& Schuster) 1/,
1/,
nowavailable
asanebook. 1/,
(March 21-April 20)
Aries (March 21-April 20)
Leo (July 24-Aug 23)
Sagittarius (Nov 23-Dec 22)
Put some zing in your sex
life by sending secret love
missives designed to get your
special lady hot, bothered
and intrigued. The passion
mounts as weeks of mystery
continue. Will you remain
behind the scenes as you pull
her emotional strings? I doubt
it. "All talk and no action" is
just not your style, Aries.
Lionesses are not only regal
felines, they are also the
most alluring animals. When
you've got it, flaunt it and
when you need it, go get it.
This is no time to sit at home
and wait for a knock on the
door. Get out and prowl. You
never know who's hiding in
the bushes. Ah, but whose
bushes?
Gather your best bosom
buddies and plan a series of
get togethers close to home.
Create an especially convivial
and comfortable collection
of the most interesting,
accomplished and sexy
ladies. So pass around the
gay cheer and see who you
can meet, greet and sweep
off her feet.
Taurus (April 21-May 21)
Virgo (Aug 24-Sept 23)
Capricorn (Dec 23-Jan 20)
Gal pals create unexpected
tumult in your life. Seems
like they want to control
your every move and guide
you to things they want to
do but you may not. Keep
your composure. Taureans
are stubborn sisters who
don't like being handled. But
then again, they love being
handled.
Relationships heat up and
there will be ample time
and energy to make any
liaison great. Earthy Virgos
know what to do and when
to do it. For those seeking a
connection, there is no time
like the present to paint the
town pink and check out new
dyke spots.
You are full of great ideas
and big opinions. Now is
the time to share with those
who can make them realities.
Some of these proposals will
take you far or establish you
as a thinker and orator. But
don't just fan the air. Use that
wonderful mouth of yours
for more interesting and
passionate pursuits.
Libra (Sept 24-Oct 23)
Gemini (May 22-June 21)
Geminis are climbing to the
top of the corporate heap
as they pour soothing oil on
upper management. How
far can you slide and glide
up the food chain? Turns
out you have some powerful
girlfriends who can act as an
advance team. Remember to
spread some of that oil with
those who deserve it.
Cancer (June 22-July 23)
Your long-term plans may
involve some international or
unusual travel. You may have
been in a rut, overworked or
in need of a jolt to increase
your energy. So get moving.
Cancers with the urge to
explore will find hot spots on
which to focus their attention.
(tinyurl.com/HerScopes)
~ And I don't mean WiFi!
80
CURVE
FEB/MAR
2017
Hard work pays off for Libras
with an agenda and a mind
focused on accomplishing it.
Clear your desk by moving
items from the inbox to your
'out' box. Your efforts will put
you in touch with someone
special who may figure in
your future plans. Love at first
sight? It depends. How sharp
is your eyesight, valentine?
Aquarius (Jan 21-Feb 19)
Aqueerians feel in the fiscal
pink and why not? You have
been carefully cultivating
your money tree and now is a
good time to pluck a few juicy
rubyfruits. While you don't
want to waste any money,
feel free to splurge a little. But
also plant a few money seeds
now to bloom in summer.
Scorpio (Oct 24-Nov 22)
Pisces (Feb 20-March 20)
Your creativity hits a high
now, Scorp. See where your
imagination has the greatest
impact. Anything artistic,
romantic or dramatic will
work. Heck, why not even try
a combination of all three!
Launch a half-baked idea and
watch it cook to a bun-licious
level. You have no barriers to
hold you back from success.
Guppies jump into the social
swim and make a splash this
spring. What is it about you
that seems to be attractive
to anyone you choose?
Maybe it's your boundless
enthusiasm. Maybe it's
your sultry, sexy presence.
Whatever it is, you'll find that
party central is where you
hang your hat.
~
I
l>INAU 261~
WE'ttE 6ETTIN6 ftEAl>Y.AftE Y~V?
ICl1TENS
IXT • Pt6t>V<:U
GOLD
SILVER
INCLRI
Dffll
TII~-
TheDinoh.com
IJ Club Skirts Dinah Shore Weekend
't# @DinohShore
I #DinohShore I
rn~
888-92dinoh
•· •
_
I
•
r
MARCH 29 • APRL 2, 2017 • PALMSPFINGS, CA
••Th~~iGirlPa~·M;;;;;;·;;~;i;,;;l·;,;~Wcrlj···
TheFlorida
Keys
The rest of the country has finally embraced the opento forever, but there will never be a more beautiful
KeyWest
place to celebrate this historic achievement.
Close To Perfect - Far From Normal
minded attitude that Key West has been committed
fla-keys.com/gaykeywest
305.294.4603
~~.~
Big P,ne Key & The Lower Keys